#i hate them (affectionate <3) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

opiopal · 4 days ago

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thinking about how for some reason my brain convinced itself that demons have a hard time realizing that their emotions and feelings aren’t to different from humans. highkey this is just an angsty headcanon,(I think… now I may be a little delusional…. It’s… kinda canon..???? I don’t remember😭 my minds telling me that it was hinted) but either way it makes me think of good angsty sad ways for the brothers to finally have this realization of “wait a minute humans can feel like that too?? Huh,”like, I personally have put my mc through hell before she could even turn 18, and she’s still struggling to work past everything since she lost someone really close to her. And it makes me think of an Mc having an episode and the brothers are just…😧

For the sake of me being able to write coherently and also be able to properly write from experience-let’s say mc, while out in public, had suddenly smelled something that had brought them back for a moment, and they can’t seem to bring themselves out of fight or flight, because of course brains are stupid like that.

as usual with my longer more serious things, a few warnings for those who would like one: ⚠️description of trauma related panic/anxiety, (though said trauma is up to interpretation and undetailed) Mc gets irrationally angry, mammon gets yelled at</3, four out of the seven brothers act very stupid, WRITTEN DIALOGUE DEAR LORD😨😨😨😨, pre-pact with Lucifer(so first season of the OG OM), satans kind of the only one with more than a few brain cells, hurt comfort ig? No romantic relationships established/mentioned, sry gang the other brothers aren’t mentioned much apart from Satan being a g.. mams is my guilty pleasure😞⚠️

it started when all eight were out shopping, it was a rare day off for all of them, and many had agreed that it would be a good idea to do some shopping(a few wanting to simply just get a few person items and not necessities.) and quite frankly it turned out to be a nice outing! Not many arguments, no one got the group kicked out of anywhere, and they actually managed to get lunch without Beel wrecking the place after being denied more food, honestly it was just perfect! Even Mc was having a great time, they had gotten a few trinkets for themselves, though not a whole lot- only a funky little keychain and a brand new school bag! They had only remembered how horribly damaged their current one was from carrying all those books all year when they noticed a wonderful bag in their favorite color sitting on a rack, so they figured it would be a nice and useful little treat for themselves! But they were suddenly pulled from their thoughts when they took a deep breath in and smelled something horribly familiar, only for a moment. Almost immediately they shut down, they fall silent, their brain immediately becomes overwhelmed with thoughts and panic, “why now? God I hope they don’t notice- am I attention seeking? I feel gross. Why am I tearing up? Shit. Shit shit shit shit. Why now why now why now why now???!!!” they can’t wrap their brain around the reason WHY this just HAD to happen now and not in the privacy of their own bedroom. And why this split second of a scent can just do this to them this easily. And why does this always happen in public???! Satan is the first to notice Mc’s shift in mood. He can sense some anger, and he can sense it more clearly due to their pact. The sudden feeling caught him off guard, what in the world upset them? It didn’t feel like the white hot seething rage he himself was usually accustomed to feeling, but more like a sudden irritation-however, nothing could have possibly provoked it? Hell, a second ago they were just giggling at Beel for already reminiscing about the food they JUST ate. He turns his head to meet their eyes, but their gaze is focused on the ground, their brows furrowed as they seem strangely focused. Satan begins to assume Mc has started to get overwhelmed. He’s read about it, and maybe Levi had sent him a few online articles about humans a while back so than he could understand Mc better. Though he later realized he didn’t need to read much of it, since it seemed quite similar to what he experienced often. Though he still quickly went over all the information in his mind, and decided to speak up to the rest of the group, he knew pointing out mc’s condition wouldn’t do much for them but freak them out further, so he went with a reasonable excuse. “I think it’s time we should start heading back. I want to begin reading these preferably tonight.” He motions to the books he had picked out for himself as a few groans break through the waves of agreement, and ultimately they all turn and begin to walk back. Thankfully not much else happens, everyone is too tired from the unexpectedly good shopping trip to even properly bicker among themselves.

the second they walk through the front doors Mc darts to their room, maybe a little too fast since it causes the others to offer a glance in Mc’s direction. They nearly slam their door shut while tossing their shopping bag on the ground, they don’t even bother to turn on the lights, it was just another thing to overwhelm them and they did NOT need that right now, besides, the small hanging lights above their bed provided a comforting glow to the room. They throw off their shoes as they shakily sit on the edge of their bed, staring down at their knees as they try those stupid breathing exercises that the internet swears work. They fumble with their sleeves, trying to focus on the texture of the fabric. They try counting backwards from 20, then 30, then 50, and so on. But of course it’s never that simple, why would the universe allow anything simple to come their way? God they feel stupid. So insanely stupid and dramatic and sensitive- but before they can beat themselves up further they try one more time to ground themselves, by.. attempting to look on the bright side? At least no one noticed, at least they didn’t cry infront of any of them, at least the brothers were way to tired to continue to bug th-

They then hear their bedroom door swing open. Of course. they forgot to lock their damn door.

the lights are flicked on as the usual four flood in. Mammon immediately jumps onto their bed, taking his usual spot next to mc, asmo pulls out a chair to sit on as he sifts through photos of himself to post to devilgram, Levi sits on the ground with his back against the bed, and beel immediately take a seat and begins snacking on whatever he hauled out of the kitchen. oh how mc loved them. But not right now. God they felt bad for even feeling even more overwhelmed by the four just continuing to exist. But it was just too loud. There was a crinkle in their right ear- the sound of a camera shutter as well. Talking in their left ear. Below them the sound of a video game raged on, as if it were too good to only take up sound in one of their ears and decided to overwhelm both. They felt someone touch their legs and arms a few times. They were suddenly aware of the clothes on their body, they could feel their finger nails. Everything just suddenly became sensory hell. Touch. Crinkle. Click. Pew. Fabric. Touch. Crinkle. Click. Pew. Fabric. they couldn’t take it, suddenly everything in their body was yelling at them to just LEAVE, LEAVE THE ROOM, DONT BE HERE GET AWAY. GOD WHO CARES JUST GO. GO NOW. THEY CAN SUCK IT UP IF YOU’RE NOT AROUND. LEAVE.

suddenly it was like their legs moved on their own, lifting them up off the bed and silently exiting their own bedroom, the only room in the house that should feel like their own. But of course it isn’t. Mc hadn’t even listened the question Mammon had just asked. Something about.. shoes? Then.. they think he questioned what was up with them, but they couldn’t tell. all commotion comes to a stop as all four pause to watch mc leave.

okay, something definitely isn’t right. Mammon immediately pushes off the bed and walks to the door, pausing to look at his younger brothers and orders them to stay put. And for once they listen. Maybe because it was the first time they’d seen their human act like this. mammon speed walks out, looking left and right to see where Mc had set off to. he spots the back of their heel ducking behind a wall. Even though they were moving fast, he was faster. He catches up quickly and reaches out, grabbing their wrist.

“yo what’s your deal-“

“STOP. DONTTOUCHME.”

mc yanks their arm away from him roughly as they spin around to look at him, their sudden outburst causes him to stop, absolutely baffled. He doesn’t even feel offended he just got yelled at- he’s just surprised it was by none other than Mc. he stares at their face as it starts to get a little red, tears finally falling down their face. Crap. Did he cause this? Did he say something? Was it one of his brothers? Did something happen and he wasn’t there? Why were they crying??

“hey, hey hey- mc, i-it’s okay,”

he instinctively reaches out again, but forces his arms to stop moving the second he watches them take a few steps back. They take a deep breath in, their head feels foggy and their vision seems to give out slightly as their mouth moves on its own.

“no, NO ITS NOT! I CANT BREATH AROUND HERE. I CANT EVEN CALM MYSELF DOWN IN MY OWN ROOM WITHOUT ONE OF YOU BARGING IN!” ‘stop.’ Their mind yells at them. ‘Stop yelling at him,’ but they just can’t.

“I CANT HAVE TIME TO MYSELF. I JUST CANT! IM NOT AN ENDLESS SOURCE OF CONVERSATION FOR YOU PEOPLE!”

he can’t help but shrink in on himself a bit- is that how they make them feel? Do they actually feel so suffocated by them? Is that how he makes them feel?

“I- I JUST-JUst... ” their mouth finally listens to their brain as they begin to loose their voice to hiccups and wheezes, they couldn’t breath, their head felt light, everything was spinning, stars dotted their vision. Mammon just stood and watched as they began to hang their head, shaky hands reaching to try and wipe away their tears. It finally clicks in his head, he’s seen his brothers break like this plenty of times. Over their lost feathers, over the fall, over her. That’s when he realizes that it couldn’t possibly be about something that happened today, or even yesterday, or maybe even a year ago. Even though there was no way he could have possibly known, he still felt guilty.

“I’m sorry.. yo-u don’t.. you didnt.. DO anything I’m just.. it’s me..”

They finally speak again, mousy, hiccupy, and full of guilt. he raises his arms up again,

“Can I.?” ”yesplease.”

he pulls them in quickly, resting his head on top of theirs as their arms squeeze around his torso tight. They muffled their cries in his shoulder, effectively soaking through his shirt, though he couldn’t care less. “I’m sorry-you don’t deserve to be yelled at- I’m sorry- I’m just-“ ”its fine, it’s fine. Ya don’t have to explain nothin. Not like this.” And so they don’t. they just stand there, squeezing onto each other until the shake in mc’s legs finally fades and their head stops feeling fuzzy. Mammon can feel as their heart finally stops trying to escape their chest, and they loosen their arms and sort of fall into his chest. the relief he feels when mc finally lifts themselves away from him is immense, they wipe their face one more time before looking at him, then at his shirt, then they snort a little “sorry,” ”eh- oh this? Nah don’t worry about it, I needa wash it anyways.” they knew he was lying for their sake, they could smell how clean it was. But they laughed again anyways, he cracks a smile and clears his throat. ”do ya want me to kick everyone out your room?” ”that’d be nice..”

he walks ahead of Mc back to their room, asmo and Levi object the second mammon cocks his thumb to motion out the door as he tells them to “beat it,”, but beels nudges them once he spots mc’s red and tear stained face. So reluctantly they stand up, awfully confused sure, but they leave anyways. Asmo desperately wants to fuss over mc, offering a cooling face mask or a bath in his bathroom, but he restrains himself and heads off for his own room. Levi feels a bit grumpy, but like asmo he makes himself keep quiet, guilt replacing the hint of entitlement he felt for a moment when he himself took in how utterly miserable mc looked. Beel gently pats mc’s shoulder, squeezing gently as he looks down at them with a small frown, mc places a hand over his, ”I’m okay, I’m sorry, we can hang out tomorrow,” they whisper, he slowly nods his head, unsure of what else to do, so he does as the other two did and makes his way to his own room.

“oi, do ya need anything?” ”no- well maybe a nap… thank you,” ”don’t mention it,”

the second he’s gone from view mc returns to their room, actually making sure to turn the lock and flicking the lights back off before CRUMBLING onto their bed. They felt bad, but they know they would have felt worse if they decided to push through and force themselves to continue to socialize. Finally they manage to shut their eyes, thankfully no nightmares decide to haunt their consciousness. Possibly due to the work of the youngest after hearing beels explanation as to why he wasn’t hanging out with Mc anymore, but who knows really. a few hours pass and Mc finally opens their eyes again, looking around their room and checking the time on their alarm clock, 1:36AM. They would have felt more embarrassed about missing dinner after their outburst- but instead they notice a water bottle and one of their favorite snacks placed on their nightstand. They sit up and stare, there wasn’t a note, it wasn’t a big grand gesture, but it still felt loving. They chug down most of the water as they try to make a mental note of finding however left it for them and thanking him. •

(YAYAY I FINALLY FINISHED IT! Honestly turned out to be more fluff than the angst I wanted.. but I had to finish it off more wholesomely after I made myself sad, bc originally mc was just gonna leave mams in the hall and go off somewhere else to calm down after yelling. But im still glad i was finally able to sit down and write something longer than a fluff hc. Sry if theres any spelling mistakes, i am but one very dyslexic person😞 also sry its so mammon heavy i just can’t help myself i lobe him😁 I am gonna try to post a cute little hc next so if anyone wants to have a say in which brothers just lmk cuz I also wanna know what I should write LMAO)

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