#im. having struggles again and thats just how it be... <333< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[night-raven-miscellany]

(✨open rp post! If ppl are interested, ofc.)

Casimir sat quietly on a bench in the NRC courtyard, reading over a collection of pages. He'd flip through a few at a time, reading and rereading them, until he would sigh, flipping back to the start of the pages...

Eventually, he would seem to give up on a stack, turning to another collection of pages, and repeat the process before returning to a previous stack.

[pearlescentparade]

Valentines.. Oh my goodness gracious.. oh my lord..🤤🤤🤤 She needs to oiled up righttt nowww and be tied with a bow in my bed immediately!!! Waiter!! Waiter!! More Valentines please!!

Tell us abt him pls.. PLEASE!!! Pretty pleas.. pls..❤️

-🍊🍨

HEH. CRACKS MY KNUCKLES . VALETNINES TIDBITS COMING RIGHT UP!!!

valentines hails from House Chocolate, a clan in my series that specializes in negotiation and business and whose members possess an innate ability to Charm (a psychological skill that increases a target's willingness to listen and follow orders, but doesnt guarantee complete obedience). despite this, valentines is not very keen on making deals or anything. rather, she's an aerial outrider who scouts the perimeter

she has an identical twin, who is the head of House Chocolate. he's older than them by 20 minutes, and they have a typical sibling relationship. in terms of personality, they are wildly different

valentines was completely shut off and hidden from society by his caretakers at age 6 when she demonstrated extremely effective abilities to Charm others to the point of almost complete mind control (she had no bad intentions, she was just very excited to make friends :[). he was released 20 years later, now sloppy and clumsy in controlling her Charm due to lack of usage, which results in valentines often activating it when he doesnt mean to

enjoys valentine's day for the aesthetic only, but doesn't actually like the concept because she doesn't believe love should be so commercialized for a single day,, love should be shown everyday :[

due to little social interaction during confinement, valentines is poor at picking up social cues and norms, so he often can't read the room well (which has both benefits and drawbacks). additionally, she sometimes speaks in a way that comes off as vague and easy to misconstrue, leading to misunderstandings. other times, he can cross boundaries, but is quick to fix it if you reprimand her

she peoplewatches as a hobby, perching on roofs and observing how people socialize

she has low self-esteem. being raised like a prisoner makes him see himself as something that doesn't even deserve to be touched or looked at. maybe thats why she likes being in the sky, where nobody has to do either. tends to also fall into the thought process that if it werent for his Charm, nobody would want to be around him.

particularly skilled at archery

out of all of the planned characters so far, valentines is the most friendly and open (as symbolized by the gaping hole in his torso that reveals her organs [the boxes of chocolates are meant to look like lungs and the heart chocolate is well... her heart]), but she struggles with controlling his extreme feelings (again, a result of poor social interaction. it leads to poor emotional regulation). out of everyone, valentines's flaws are the worst to deal with.

a bit of a people pleaser because he's desperate to make friends and actually maintain a friendship

theres obviously much more planned but i either cant think of it at the moment or i want to keep it hidden for now,, ,,,im realizing a lot of this info is very angsty and about her flaws guys pls hes a sweetheart i swear i just like to nerf my characters into the ground </333

[mirxzii]

hanni's tumblr wrapped!

everyone's making a little wrapped on here, and i didn't want to feel left out! since i don't write, i'll put some of my art pieces, since i want to post more art here in 2025. and ofc, some messages to my favourite mutuals. im sorry for being a little mia this year, but i want to talk again in 2025!!

favourite art piece

hands down this piece, no question. i literally saw the concept pictures and something possessed me dont ask how i made this

the art piece that took the longest time

though it looks the simplest, this scoups drawing took me the longest time, 9 hours! this was my first svt drawing after changing my art style :))

most unserious art piece

bald jeonghan to deal with... is an explanation needed?

most difficult art piece

i wouldn't say this was insanely difficult, but shading the mask and drawing the hair were definitely parts where i struggled. product was worth it tho!!

least favourite art piece of 2024

i say this only because this was made right as i was entering a horrible art block. its also supposed to be vernon but it looks nothing like him, so thats my reasoning

favourite non drawing of 2024

this took an excruciating 30 hours to make but it was SO worth it. saw those mingyu pics and i wanted to try a magazine collage so..! all questions answers and quotes are from actual interviews with him ;))

work in progress going into 2025

it's going to look sooo good when done trust. you all will see it

most inspiring art piece of 2024

this was the first drawing i made that changed my artstyle for good (wicked??) it still makes me happy everytime i see it

best non seventeen art piece of 2024

idk i just tbink this one looks so cool. made it in like 2 hours on the plane i was so bored

honourable mentions

taking this moment to mention i have commissions open! probably for robux (pls hmu)

mutuals appreciation

my two most favourite writers @fairyhaos and @blue-jisungs. i love you both from the bottom of my heart!! your writing is just so ethereal and i always come back to read it. thank you for being my friend (and for accepting my fic requests lol) dont forget me when youre famous!!!

@wheeboo @rubywonu and @slytherinshua i just love you all so much and!! your writing!! rania i feel like im in another universe reading your stories, nia's writing is so sweet and easy to enjoy, and zanna's writing is literally perfect to just sit down and binge read. ily guys sm and have an amazing new year!!

and finally a shout out to some of my other awesome mutuals!! have a great new year <333 @welcometomyoasis @weird-bookworm @planetkiimchi @starshuas @haowrld @icyminghao @haecien @etherealyoungk @wonijinjin

my new year's resolution for tumblr is to be more active <3 i cant wait to see you all in 2025! i love you all so much 🫶🫶

[wasyago]

how did u get so good at composition:3 did u like to draw background all the time or it came to be after practice how long does one piece usually take:333

hehe well, thank you first of all. second of all... um both? practice yes, no one gets it on the first time. and just. i dont know? doing it over and over again and trying new things and experimenting, seeing what works, what doesn't, where the background is needed and not.

i remember i heard a lot of artists around me saying that they didn't like or couldn't draw backgrounds, and for some reason i decided that im not gonna be like other girls and learn to do it. and i uhhh.... just started? drawing backgrounds? i was trying, and watching tutorials on youtube, and seeing how other people did it and eventually it got easier? i can say that i definitely enjoyed figuring out how to do it, struggling to get the perspective and composition right. like, it was hard but i had a lot of fun doing it, so it felt natural and just like, normal art progression? it didn't feel like i was going out of my way to draw backgrounds, i just did it when i felt like it?

at some point i joined a character ask, you know, when people ask questions and you draw the character answering. and i decided that im gonna draw a background for each answer instead of it being a character on a blank background. and doing this, like, specifically trying to draw backgrounds and tell a story with them, and doing it regularly and coherently, it helped me progress a lot. like, i started with a character sitting on a couch in a room, and then it got better and better, multiple rooms, multiple angles of the same room, different locations and images. it helped me a ton. just, figuring out when you need a background, when its rather i did something simple for one frame and focused on the other instead, where the character needs to be positioned, etc.

i can say i didn't do a lot of proper studies, and if i did maybe it would've been helpful... i only drew things that were in my head, with characters that i liked, with imaginary locations and stuff. never really drew from photos... we did go on plein-airs, or whatever they're called, when i was in art school, so drawing backgrounds from real life probably also helped a little, but i can't remember anything about it so it didn't do as much.

i looked at a lot of art from cool artists and expanded my visual library, i analyzed their art trying to figure out why i like it and how to make my art have the same kind of feeling. and i still do! sometimes something just takes over me and i scroll pinterest for 3 hours looking at pretty art and going to artists' profiles and saving art and using it as inspiration later. and it helps! a lot!

i dont know where this post is going ummm. i guess if you want to learn to draw something, just like, start. scrap it if you don't like it and try again, have fun, don't get attached. and uhh, i felt a little nostalgic so here are some of my pieces that i did throughout the years. definitely feels like i got better at it recently, but there's still a lot of room for improvement

oh and for your second question. one piece takes about ummmm... more than a thousand episodes, thats 20 minutes times 1000 devided by 60 devided by 24... we're looking at about 14+ days of non stop watching?

no but for real. i dont really keep track of time when im drawing, uhh. plus depending on the complexity... my recent jrwi drawings are sketches, so they took maybe one or two hours max. something rendered uhhh, maybe 5 hours? if i don't finish it in one day the chances of this drawing ever getting done are super low, soo yeah

[hyunjins-orange-slice-too]

emmy!!!

i dont know you, you dont know me, i only know a few os that you've posted and found comfort in them. I wanted to thank you for them, you put effort in something just so others can feel giddy and nice too <333

i dont know that one of the poems you wrote actually relates to your life or not (the one with a tear on the teddy and feeling unattractive) i just wanted to say, that i have older sister (turning 29) and shes also saying stuff like that, and many others her age too and i just can say that theyre so damn pretty. And i bet so are you. Im not just saying that because thats what anyone would say. i dont even know how you look like, i just know you give off pretty energy through the screen!!!

so from one silly stay to the other, life sucky and can be a big meanie, so poop on it and continue (easier said than done i know i know...) take little steps, take the help from others if you get it offered. I dont know if what im gonna say could have anything to do with you but, maybe you gotta put your pride aside and what others think of you to move forward.

damn that turned long, i just wanted to write something to make you smile because your content makes me smile. You seem so sweet <3. I hope you will get the biggest hug before monday and that you will find something to cheer you up and money on the ground

mwah mwah <3333

(sorry for grammar mistakes or spelling mistakes!!!!! )

so i got this message while i was on break at work. but i wanted to wait until i got home to answer it so that i could give a thought out response instead of a quick one. but now that im here, there are no thoughts. only emotions. so i will try my best.

thank you. truly. that poem, unfortunately, does come from my own experience and i wrote it when i was having a particularly tough night. i have never felt attractive. ever. not today, not on my wedding day, and definitely not when i was younger. i’ll save you the details, but honestly, i hate every single thing about myself. apart from my ability to be kind. even if im not attractive or beautiful or whatever, i know that the way i treat others is beautiful. so i try to focus on that.

you are correct in saying that i need to put aside my thoughts on what others may think of me, and that’s something i have always struggled with and continue to struggle with. and maybe that’s a small part of a bigger diagnosis. i’m sure it’s related to my anxiety.

luckily i have some of the most amazing friends that i could go to if i ever needed to. though i need to work on actually opening up to them and telling myself im not burdening them.

but i try to do my best each day and messages from sweet people like yourself make that so much easier. so again, thank you. it’s comforting to know that there are still people out there who are genuinely kind. i’m sure you’re just as beautiful as your words suggest.

this got long lol sorry. but your message made my day! brought tears to my eyes honestly. so thank you. thank you for being here and reading my silly little fics. and thank you for being so so sweet.

🩷🫂

[violntfemme]

hi doli this is a yap pass you know the drill :333

i figure everybody needs one every once in a while

- ash

YEAH OKAY WOOHOOOO I LOVE YAP PASSES

we are up thinking about dally. again. as always. most specifically sh dally TRUTH. god i love 'taboo' hcs...but also dally and johnny's entire dynamic as it is so honestly ill start with that first because looordddd do i have THOUGHTS.

tw// sh and suicide!! im yapping about dally be warned

okay so obviously we know johnny is 'obsessive,' but i think some people forget that if we take into account what the fuck happrned, dally is equally - if not more - obsessive as johnny is. I think they both just demonstrate it differently than each other. Johnny shows it in a more straightforward, 'worshipping,' way, but dally demonstrates it in a more discreet way I guess? Its discreet until the end at least, i mean he literally killed himself for johnny🤷‍♀️

what i find interesting about their dynamic though is that it in no way could be healthy. that is mutual obsession at its FINEST and it can. NOT. end well. One dies, the other dies. One leaves, the other is ruined, if not both of them ruined. Problem with this is one of them is bound to die in every universe. Usually, if any were to die first, it would be Dally. Hell, he was close to snapping by the time johnny died anyway, i dont think he wouldve lasted long even if johnny lived. Bit the problem with this is thag if dally died first, johnny would probably feel like an empty shell of a person if you get what i mean? Like, Dally was one of the things Jonny loved, but he loved him the hardest. Johnny loved ponyboy, but in a different way than he loved Dally. And im not just talking about the fhance of romantic love either. No, im talking about idolization and putting each other on a pedestal. For johnny, this pedestal isnt fragile, it would take a lot to break. But i think for dally, hes holding johnny higher than the rest, yeah, but it doesnt take much for that pedestal to crumble.

So, back to what i said earlier, dally was one of the things johnny loved, but johnny was the only thing dally loved. Recipe for disaster. Johnny loved him and idolized him, dally thought of him as a purpose to keep going. I mean, Dally really didnt know how to handle his emotions at all and he saw himself as someone who had to protect johnny. (i know thats a big reason on why he reacted the way he did.) He thought he failed and whatnot, but that also doesnt excuse the fact they blatantly favored each other over most of the gang(exception being ponyboy, but even then i dont think johnny favored either.)

In short, dally was a mess who couldnt handle emotions and instead of figuring out his own brain and traumas, decided to take to johnny and do his best to protect him because hes like, the one person who doesnt hold a grudge against Dallas. I have hcs and whatnot about why he got drawn to johnny(like he saw himself in the kid, even if he was only a year older, but that aint canon so🤷‍♀️.)

Their dynamic fucks me up so hard and in tired of pretending they would be healthy. they wouldnt!! they would be HORRIBLE for each other!!! they would feed into each others obsession, probably get extremely jealous over each other, and they would be completely unaware about how bad they are together. Yes, they are portrayed as a duo, but dallys way of dealing with his struggles is ignoring them til he snaps. Johnnys way of dealing with his is also ignoring them until he snaps.

They both showed that they at least had suicidal thoughts and again, if someone ended up killing themself, it would br a punch to the gut for the other. This is IGNORING the constant worrying that would be going on that the other is in danger, the other may have killed themself, the other hates them, etc etc. They both demonstrated suicidal thoughts. they both demonstrates obsessive behavior. put those two togetehr and youre getting the worst of both worlds. Im not even gonna get into what woukd happen if someone DID end up killing themself because thag would be a violent circle of self hatred and guilt for whoever lived if not an immediate death. For johnny i think he would try and live on but constantly blame himself that it was his fault he died, or he would instantly follow after him. With dally, he would get mad. oh he would br a ball of anger and hate and he would snap much like he did in the movie, if not worse. I think hr would also blame himself for the reasoning AND the fact that he wasnt enough for johnny, difference being he would probably end up dying an hour after he got the news.

Alrighty, time for sh dally truth now because this man is the embodiment of self destruction and i think there is no way he wouldnt have at least TRIED it. This is partly me projecting my own problems onto characters but also i genuinely think its in his character to actually do it, yknow? Part of me thinks he would do it to seem tough, that he can handle pain and he would ise that as an excuse to keep going cause no ones stopping him. The other part of my brain is saying that he would do it as a genuine coping mechanism or the desire to feel pain.

From firsthand experience im saying..neither! Im seeing it as a way for him to get an adrenaline rush, if not for a little bit of pain/'punishment.' Most of his reckless behavior is, from what i see, the result of getting bored. He sees normal living and to him its boring. He wants to shake shit up and start problems and rven then, he gets bored of that too. Eventually, he's bound to run out of things to give him that rush of adrenaline anymore and yk. sh is just there. its new, it lets him get an 'adrenaline rush' for the time being and then he'll stop. Then he does it again, then he stops, and its a cycle until surprise surprise, it turns into a comfort more than anything!

Instead of getting an adrenaline rush for a little, it calms him down and he realizes he likes that WAY more. add in his already self destructive nature i doubt he'd see much wrong with it, too. Just as a thing he does to 'calm down.' I dont even think hed have a 'main form.' Cvtting, burning, whatever, i dont think hed use one more than the other. Whatever he can get his hands on in that moment is fair game.

I could go more into the psych of it all if i wanted but im summing it up to a subconscious need to feel pain accompanied by an addiction and a false sense of euphoria. I also have a lot of ideas about the gang finding out and either being extremely concerned or chalking jt up to 'yeah, thats dally.' because they know they wouldnt be able to do jack shit to stop him. so yeah. youre welcome for the yap

[kellystar321]

im asking YOU a question. haha. pranked.

which ava stickman would you most want to hug

HGKJHG DAMB, PRANKED <33 hello eros i adore you <3

I WANT TO HUG RED HE GOES THROUGH SO MUCH AND FOR WHAT HKJH, possessed by Herobrine and loses most competitions and is trying SO HARD,,, like, during the events of AvM episodes 20-30:

Green goes on a big musical adventure and has an emotional heart-to-heart with Purple, there's no physical battle

Yellow and Blue have to battle, but they have each other and A REALLY POWERFUL WEAPON, and they're absolutely prepared with backup to spare

Orange is having. A time. because they need to hide from the warden, but that's kinda all it was, hiding from it. he's not really hurt from the battle, just scared.

MEANWHILE.

THIS ISNT EVEN FKGGJING ALL OF IT TOO.

Went through the events of the Witch Fight with everyone else

Fought, got beat up and was nearly killed by Orange in The Lush Caves

FELL THROUGH THE ROOF OF A FCKING SCHOOL, re-met the person who possessed him, got slammed into the wall of a classroom

Jegus i dont even like looking back through the bullying montage, there SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN A BULLYING MONTAGE

BEAT UP BY ALL OF THE OTHER MONSTERS AS SEEN ABOVE ^

literally was the second stick back in the big boss fight, so they were in it for a WHILE (they PASSED OUT,,, they legitimately swayed on their feet and fell backwards, unconscious for a second, and then IMMEDIATELY HAD TO GET BACK UP AND INTO BATTLE AGAIN)

ALL THIS VVV HAPPENED

POSSESSED BY HEROBRINE AGAIN (probably on better terms now but like JEGUHDF THE AMOUNT HIS PHYSICAL BODY GOT BEAT UP WHILE POSSESSED)

^^^ UNCONSCIOUS FOR SO LONG AFTER POSSESSION, AND THEN IMMEDIATELY ONCE THEY GET BACK UP, WHAT DO THEY DO? FIRST ONE TO RUN BACK INTO THE FRAY!!

ALWAYS THE FIRST. ALWAYS THE FIRST!!! THE THING I LOVE ABOUT THEM SO MUCH IS THAT THEY'RE SO BRAVE AND SO RECKLESS, theyre so eager to jump back into the mix, they NEED to help, they need to fight, no sense of self preservation, as long as he's up he can fight, as long as he can struggle to get to his feet, as long as he can do SOMETHING, off he goes, unabashedly and unafraid, and THAT'S WHY THEY'RE ALWAYS THE FIRST ONE DEAD. BECAUSE HE WANTS TO DO SOMETHING, no matter how powerless he is, as long as he can stand up, he will fight to his dying breath, and i love him SOOO MUCH. red is the sweetest, bravest, most selfless little guy and he is always trying.

AND THATS WHY I WANT TO HUG THEM THE MOST. THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK <333

[reco-obsessed]

HC ANON HERE!!!!!! do u have hcs for...baby reko? :333

howdy there my hc anon . im sorry im late to respond once again . the truth is i have a lot less headcanons for baby reko, at least off the top of my head . a lot of these will be centric around alice too because a lot of the focus of when she was a kid was around them as siblings .

i think reko started doing rebellious / "bad" kid stuff even before her "official" rebellion in middle school, at least in small ways. if i remember correctly she says crap in one of her lines during the minisode, which while really not that bad of curse word, is probably hot shit for an 8-12 year old. her parents suspected her of being a defiant kid for a long time, but they never relented against it or disapproved until she was older, figuring she would grow out of it.

she was probably a really sporty, stereotypically tomboyish kid

alice was the complete opposite

i imagine most of her friends as a little kid were boys who she'd play sports and stuff with. mightve had a "not like other girls" phase (or, for a transfem baby reko, it couldve just been an exaggerated "boys rule girls drool" type of thing).

which is why she definitely doesnt wanna watch weird sparkly magical girl shows, okay ?!? ewwwwwww !!!!!!! its not her fault alice always gets to the tv first (and that she never tries to change the channel...)

and if one of the girl characters makes her feel weird than thats neither nor there .

i dont think she developed an interest in make up and more feminine fashion until later- when she was later in her teens, and she had more of a capacity to unpack things like gender expression and the ability to perform femininity for other women, not men.

classic case of pushing away girly stuff as a kid because she was always told it was about being "pretty for boys" and other reductive ideas. she always had a distaste for that. on the other hand, she mightve been able to tell she felt a certain way about other girls (whether that be wanting to be one or wanting to be with them) at an early age, and that probably reinforced her rejection of girly things, too.

expanding more on alice. he liked playing outside, sure, but he couldnt really keep up with her, and especially not her friends. he probably got teased a lot, but especially by the kind of people reko liked hanging out with. if she was there to try and shield him, that was one thing... but he couldnt just borrow friends from her, even if he wanted to. theyd probably throw rocks at him or something

alice liked quieter stuff. reading books, plays, video games, watching cartoons and drawing stuff for them. more of a homebody. reko would try to participate in this stuff with him, but especially as she got older, it became more and more the other way around. reko getting better at him with piano was just one thing; more and more, he noticed other ways he couldnt keep up with her as she grew up. he wasnt a runner, he didnt like horsing around, and he couldnt handle even light teasing from boys his age. in the end, usually reko would be the one comforting him instead of the other way around.

i dont think alice developed a more competitive, rough and tough streak until he was older. theres the chance he had the rare hints of it as a kid (maybe one boy he had a bit of rivalry with or something where he wouldnt take it lying down), but his mom discouraged it. reko would support the contrary, but in the end, alice listened to his mother back then, which i think she mightve resented a little as a kid, on account of not being able to fully understand how he mustve felt.

i think alice would often try to include reko in his hobbies. 'can i watch you play that level' 'i drew us as sonic characters' and such. baby reko is mostly ambivalent but she tries her best.

alice probably had a couple of girl (space) friends, though i get the feeling he mightve struggled making friends with girls too. i think his friends were less gender-bound and more just about common ground. there was probably at least one or two quieter boys his age he was able to become friends with (though, how that panned out is questionable; theres a good chance theyd be like, 'youre a girl so i have a crush on you' and then not want to be friends if he didnt reciprocate).

i think despite her 'not-like-other-girls' phase she couldve easily been kind of jealous of him for being able to become friends with girls. she'd be all "eewwwww i dont wanna be around girls theyre all obsessed with boys and make up and they never want to get dirt on them" but then secretly wonder why only alice got to be around them huh. she would totally never wanna go to a tea party even a little bit but also why does only alice get to do it. i think reko did genuinely want to be friends with other girls as a kid, but probably fumbled it or couldnt make much progress because she got so used to being friends with boys. her struggling to read a "woman's heart" and all that.

oh, heres an important one: i think their mother was fairly spiritual, and probably read them a lot of horror stories and folklore as kid. i might be repeating myself i genuinely cant tell. i think theres a good shot their mother probably did things like reading them ghost stories before bed. shed just go 'and then they all died because they didnt change their bed sheets when mama said to. goodnight, mommy loves you' while baby reko and alice are there holding onto each other and shaking.

i think theres the possibility reko tried to get over her fear of ghosts and the dark as a kid and accidentally made it worse. read a really scary story or watch a 18+ horror movie as a kid when no ones looking thinking if she just sit through this, then none of the other kids will be able to make fun of her for it again, only to have debilitating nightmares for at least a week. so she has to wake up alice every night big wet eyes style so she can ask:

"are you sure there are no skin eating ghosts in our house ???? that come out when its dark ??? youre suurrrrrreeeeee?! sniff sniff..."

alice has to visibly swallow and be like "y...yes reko! im sure!" and then they both sleep with the lights on

theres the possibility she'd ask their mom instead since she knows alice is kind of scared of the same stuff too, but she probably didnt want their mom figuring out she did something she wasnt supposed to.

similarly, theres always the chance her fear of ghosts and the dark was reinforced by some sort of lasting memory as a kid. possibly something like getting teased by the other kids, them trying to get a reaction out of her but going too far in a way that makes her shaky about this stuff forever. ouch.

speaking of, i mentioned alice getting teased, but i dont think reko would be immune either. definitely a lot less, because she learns how to posture herself so she seems intimidating from an early age, but she had to earn her way there. she definitely got a least a little flack for some stuff, but not a whole lot more than other kids her age, and she knew how to stand up for herself.

hmm, alright, i think thats all ive got for now. i hope you liked these, anon !

[generalsmemories]

Hii not a request, more a ramble bevause im insane, but just came from a stressful college day (was asked if i wanted to go home so haha…obv.) and I’m so done and well maybe it seems like a request but I’m fr curious what jingy’d do like when you’re having a panic attack.

Specifically because I don’t want to be touched during one but I feel like the assumption will be that he’d just hug you and (even tho id probs want that but LIKE THATS ME ITS HIM YOU KNOW WHAG I MEAN AAAAA) like you know (do you?)

Okay sorry I’m a mess, so when I have panic attacks I go non-verbal. (I might be autistic) And like all i do is apologise and cry and hyperventilate and id love a hug but hate it at the aame time. And I feel like he’d know yk? That like if youre not into physical touch, he won’t touch. And if you are okay with it he will…. So hed ask and id nod? BUT THEN ALSO NO BECAUSE ID CRY EVEN MORE WHICH SUCKS AAAAA.

Or: i just want him yo be real and exist and hold me because im touch starved but I also dont because then hes real and I cant do anything and i cant talk and then its all fucked up because bad communication and haha mentally ill.

Sorry if this aint your tea i jusy feel its so normal bc all my friends havw this shit so we share the most insane stories and jokes yk?

Anyways much love <333

dear god anon i hope you took a nice rest when you got home from college- rememeber to put your health first before anything else! you can't flourish or give it your all if your body is ready to collapse any second.

I recently graduated earlier this year (around may) so i can totally understand the stress, but treat yourself well and i hope you got the very much needed rest. also don't be sorry, i get you and not wanting to be touched in such a vulnerable situation. well sorta anyway, i can perfectly initiate physical touch with others, but when others try it with me it's always a 50/50 chance that i will not even let them touch me or pull away after a few seconds HAHA (friends and family alike).

but as for how jing yuan would react i'm pretty sure he would notice pretty quick - he has quite a good eye for details after all! he pays close attention to everything around him, so picking up a few habits of some people would be a piece of cake for him. but if he's unsure i'm sure he would be the type to actually test the waters, if you're able to talk under such panic attacks he would softly ask and then just stay by your side as a presence if you were to confirm his suspicions!

if you weren't able to confirm or deny anything, i think he would try first. not go straight for a hug, but place a comforting hand and test the waters ya know? and if you were to first say yes then later say no he wouldn't question it - if anything if it stresses u out more after he would just placate you with the same :3 smile he sports.

BUT REMEMBER ANON FROM ME PERSONALLY!

don't put yourself down like that, battling mental illness is already a struggle in itself. you're already doing plenty enough by getting by each day! and judging by how you can still joke and talk about it with your friends, you already have close people who would probably stay by your side willingly to comfort you. you're not alone, but if you ever want to drop by again in the near future and ramble you're welcome to!

i would gladly chat with you again (و •̀ ᴗ•́ )و

[royal-they]

hi so i kinda happened to fall in love with your art.....and i wanted to ask a few things!!! (if its ok!)

uhmm first of all how long did it take you to get that art style and perfection it etc etc?

also do you have any tips for anatomy? not big complex full body anatomy, just like...idrk honestly, some tips related to anatomy or hands or just the body that helped/help you?

and uh yeah if you just have any general tips on whatever to improve my art/art style i'll take litterally anything 😭

again, i love your art, i love what you make! keep doing what you do, you're awesome!!!! sending love and support <3

ah!! tysm <333!! thats so cool to hear!!!!!!!!!/gen

ive been drawing forever honestly. i've always been really into it. im fifteen so thatd be like 12 years. and obviously i wasnt always studying it super seriously or anything. idk. my art isnt perfect by any means. i just dont really post the shitty pieces lmao. i struggle with sm stuff and will be continuing to study probably till the day i cant hold a pencil anymore lol. (i draw too much, my hand hurts ;w;) its a never ending process and honestly thats why i love it sm.

as for anatomy i think the main thing to keep in mind is that anatomy and just drawing people in general is really hard. i heard this in this old video about how pixar used to do 3d animation is that the reason they didnt do animations of humans for so long is because we ourselves have very specefic ideas of what a human looks like. i think this also applies to art. which is a really long way of saying, trust the process.

i use photos personally! you can find a lot on pinterest but there are a couple things id keep in mind when it comes to photos people edit their bodies sometimes so their proportions so be careful, it will defeat the purpose of the study if the bodies inaccurate.

idk here are some that might be good for starting off. dancers and people like that are super helpful. remember to not to focus too much on the lines but more copying down the shapes,

for hands i would just look at your own hands and try to capture them quickly. i say quickly mainly bc i shake a lot lmao, maybe youre different. or you could just be smart and take a picture of your hand but im very lazy and dont like getting up to grab my phone.

for art style id just save stuff that inspire you. could be animations, comics, album covers, cool photos, just stuff that gives you like vibes. literally ANYTHING.

like, omg this is making me think of a cool idea rn!! save it! even if you cant execute it now you can always execute it in the future when your skills are more developed :)

style studies are also helpful! try copying art you like, seeing different peoples techniques however some things to keep in mind with this are

you might accidently copy down an artists mistakes or bad habits without realizing it so try to have some variety in your artists

dont post the art. some people are okay with tracing but the vast majority of artists dont like it and it makes them uncomfortable. so id just like keep it in your sketchbook or whatever :) better safe than sorry.

anyway ah this is so longgggg! sry im so bad at being concise lol. theres probably a lot of youtube videos that could help you with this stuff if you want more explanation. the channel ive been watching a lot in since this summer is sketches of shay. she makes a variety of stuff but her art studies and resources are also very helpful :)

Sketches of Shay - YouTube

[into-the-bugverse]

guilt?

guilt: What is your OC guilty about? How do they handle their guilt? Do they try to avoid guilt, or do they accept it?

LOVE THIS ONE <333

Emoc : He feels extremely guilty about how he behaved in his relationship w/ Alec. He’s done his best to accept the guilt for the (mutual) toxic relationship, but from time to time he gets random reminders of what he did. He kind of tries to avoid it until he’s able to be in a place where he’s alone.

Samuel : His first kill gives him so much shame and guilt that it might as well have been fundamental to his formation as a person. It happened when he was??? Like 14yo and it was entirely on accident. If he thinks about it, he gets violently ill to his stomach, so he avoids the guilt as much as he can. He does. Not handle his guilt well. Samuel drinks his guilt away.

Charles : What happened with his family gives him guilt in the same way as Samuel. He gets violently ill, but he will sob over it. Im sure he would be in the fetal position in bed, face in his hands. Charles has tried to accept and move on from what happened, but untreated PTSD is a bitch. Flashbacks happen often, even when he’s j chilling at work. Big factor in why his addictions are the main way he handles his guilt.

Rodger : YIPPEE! The (mostly) healthy one!! He has gone to therapy- that’s right! Rodger went to therapy for years and learned how to healthily cope with guilt. He doesn’t struggle much with guilt from his past, though he does still suffer from flashbacks and nightmares. His philosophy with flashbacks is that he just rides them out in order to process them, but nightmares? He avoids those. When he wakes up from a nightmare, he has to work through his guilt again because of how vivid his dreams are. He doesn’t necessarily AVOID guilt, but he does avoid nightmares. That’s it tho.

Jakk : Lack of Remorse McGee over here. I don’t think he’s ever felt guilt- Even when he got into the huge ass, holy book worthy fight with Flip. Sometimes with Flip, he will give gifts when he knows he’s messed up, but thats not too often.

Flip : Selective Remorse- He only feels guilty when he hurts a few people, particularly Melissa and Mr. Happy, but even then there’s nothing that like.. haunts him iykwim? He processes his guilt pretty well me thinks

[woolying]

!!! 2024 art summaries yayy !!!

is my handwriting legible ??? it doesnt matter this is moreso just for me lol

also i really struggled finding things to put on the timeline bc the beginning of the year i was sooo Artblocked i didnt draw at all and the end of the year all i have are wips and sketches... the struggler

regardless this was a good art year for me i think!!! lots of highlights yay see yall next year <333

(past art summaries and more yapping below if u care...)

reminiscing and revisiting:

2023

i miss u kirizono........lowk i peaked here

goal: better composition -> tbh no i havent done anything too compositionally difficult... character(s) on colored background galore

goal: let ocs be seen -> i posted One(1) Once...barely... but im working on them more than i was before so i need them to be more fleshed out before i let people see them. But i am so obsessed with them now so i think its a win regardless

goal: do more studies, stop struggling!! -> i havent done many more studies but i havent been struggling that much?? do i have a better understanding of things or have i not left my comfort zone... actually that will be another goal

2022

the last time a variety of colors were seen in my art 😔💔 may they rest in peace

"lineless/rendering! ended up being not for me lol" -> i love rendering now never give up !!

goal: artstyle consistency -> not rlly lol but its fine im exploring <3

goal: better landscapes/backgrounds -> this is once again the goal for next year we'll get it this time for sure 🙏

goal: be cringe publicly! have fun! -> i am having sooo much fun but im not cringe i am so based actually... also the move from twt to here has done wonders for me. I used to be so scared and miserable all of the time about art but its chill here

reflecting:

lowkey i feel like i regressed this year in terms of skill which is kinda sad,,,, i havent drawn a background in ages, my anatomy is still kinda bad and inconsistent, idk how clothing works, etc what ever

but maybe im just being critical bc of the skill/knowledge curve thing!! at least thats what im telling myself <3

however also im trying new things that are like not related just to just illustrations (which i used to be the only thing i drew ever). like im getting back into designing ocs and coming up with aus/stories (ive always been such a bad uncreative writer its not even funny but im trying anyway!!) and im using my sketchbook again and ive tried animation ?!? which i used to say i would never do bc it seemed so hard (it still is) so maybe im just like expanding outward instead of deeper idk if thats a good thing or not ...master of none maybe

but tbh its all good honestly im just yapping bc i really am just enjoying art!! i love drawing and i love sharing my art and i love drawing other peoples ideas and !!!! yippppeeee

soon i hope i get more confident and share more of my own ideas, i feel like the art i draw is ??? not that deep or exciting just characters Who Are There or just like mildly pretty. I wanna be able to tell stories and show emotions and such in my art ykno?? but thats so hard

i wanna share ideas more but i feel like i cant unless i have art attached to it?? (part of why i wanna practice comics, bc some of them are easier to share that way) and also im just scared i guess lol. But maybe i just need to get over myself and just do it!!!!

Any Way, i love being a drawer next year we will Grow🌱🌱🆙

[kayotic-catgirl]

TMAGP 18 LIVEBLOG TIME WEEWOOWEEOO!!!!

ohhh the vibes from this ep title are SO rancid im afraid

RETURN OF TEDDY??)??!?!!!!?!?? hi alice i love you <333 teddy why are you lingering. oh miss dyer please kiss me (platonic) you are so funny. why does she has chemistry with almost everyone.

ALICE DID YOU JUST DESCRIBE CELIA AS "really weird but in a hot way". YOU ABSOLUTE BISEXUAL PLEASE JUST ASK HER ABOUT POLYAMOURY

i hope so bad thry actually get to meet up for those drink. i want everyone to be friends and happy but i know in this podcast thats basically impossible. bye teddy i hope you don't die and you actually get a job <33

sam honey are you alright. lena why are you like that. no celia today </ 3 SAD, i'll miss you darling. "childcare emergency" WHAT DOES THST MEAN. IS JACK OKAY. IS CELIA OKAY. lena do you know how small talk works.

AUGUSTUS IS THAT YOU?,!,!??!?????!!!!!!

"god i hope she stays silent" OH SO THR TALKING CORPSES ARE A REGULAR THING NOW. OKAY.

THIS CASE ALREADY REMINDS ME OF THE LONELY I KNOW THOSE SYSTEMS PROBABLY DON'T APPLY ANYMORE BUT IM ATTACHED. also this casement feels mecore can't explain it but HOLY SHIT THE SAID IT THET SAID THE WORD LONELY

oh no sam's letting alice know about the horrors hope it goes okay. "you can't just ignore this—" "why not!?" ...ow. alice :(( that hits home, are you alright?? poor alice......i understand that feeling, not wanting to address something because you're afraid it'll get worse if you do.

ALICE WHY ARE YOU SO FUNMY. I LOVE YOU. hi gwen :333

oh gwen is struggling......the horrors . god i can just hear her pure dread. i don't like the audio ambiance its making me feel like something bad will happen

GOD BONZO MENTION GET AWAY MR BONZO!!!/!/!/!/ SAM DON'T LAUGH AT HER :(( its nice to hear him crack up but GOD ANY OTHER SITUATION PLEASE

oh my god. the way gwendolyn yells at him to shut up fills me with so much upset. she's clearly fucked up by this. the sheer fucking fear in her vocie as if she's reliving it again.

alice. alice i fuckinng LOVE YOU but PLEASE. jusr be nice to gwen.

IM ACTUALLY FUCKING SHAKIFN. GEORGIE??????????? GEROEGEINVNCNNCNC!?!?!,!,!;!:!?: ALDO JACK IS HERE OMG ABSHSKSHDHD I CAN'T I CANT SOMEONE SEDATE ME THE WHIPSLAHS IS KILLING ME

"oh no! who keeps taking georgie's face?? :OO" i don't know why that was just so adorable to me

"celia...you don't have to lie to me." "i'm not!" [audio glitch] OH GOOD LORD. GEORGIE WHY IS THST YOUR FIRST QUESTION. celia darling whats happening with you.

in conclusion: OH MY GOD I FEEL LIKE I JUST GOT HIT WITH SEVEN TRAINS IN A ROW. FIRST TEDDY, THEN AGUSTUS, THEN GWEN, THEN GEORGIE??????? GOD AT THIS POINT JUST SHOOT ME I CAN'T HANDLE THIS

[cxffinpinnk]

ABSOLUTELY !!!! HEHEHE

AN TYSM !! IIM GLAD YOU ARE AN HONESTLY I THINK YOU SHOULD HOP ON THE BANDWAGON TOO Your writing is just as amazing an Im gen interested in what you can do !!!

YESYES YES YES THATS EXACTLY IT !! People who struggle with what the Questers go through can really bring out the character as a whole an it can make it 10x better, imo its better than a majority of what ppl do I will say this, I REALLY have a bone to pick with how a majority of the fandom treats Cuphead/how they rite him for their rmks, cause it always feels like they're just making him out to be an asshole an/or a sex prop (Im hypersexual an have suffered from it since I was 4. That shit is NOT funny.) , not even that but just completely strip him of his character or make fun of it completely an say "OH WELL MY VER. IS BETTER!" when all it is is a shell of what Cupheads meant to be. The amount of times Ive been icked over how someone writes him is boggling, tbh I judge ppl a little based on how they treat him an I only let in those who understand him

WE ALL ARE!! We all are snowflakes, everyone is unique in their own ways an theres a character out there for everyone to really shine through with how they are as a person <333

TOUCHING ON YOUR TAGS;

The fact his attempt gets made into a big joke is absolutely gross an disgusting, I have no idea why ppl think its okay to shame it. YES ! It wasnt that well written, NOT AN EXCUSE TO MAKE FUN OF IT !! Theres a plethora of ways suicide can be brought about an that was HIS. WAY. OF SHOWING IT. After a full ep of clear psychosis he finally let his emotions out but it was so bottled up he couldn't take it. He literally thought he lost his brother, his only family, an had a vali reason to almost end his life. It feels like nobody gets that at all, the lack of empathy ppl have is disturbing .... I can go on a full rant about it but thats for a post after this lmao

The stripper au DONT. GET ME STARTED HOLY SHIT.

THE LOLICONING OF BENDY, CUPHEAD, ALMOST EVERYONE HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT WAS THE MOST DISGUSTING SHIT EVER. rvpe an abuse is NEVER funny an the fact that it was brought about the way it was is sickening. The shit with Mickey I FUCKING HATTTEEEEEEEE HIM. I SEETH AT THE SIGHT OF HIM HE ISNT ALLAT. I FEEL HORRIBLE FOR BOREESE AN THE OTHER KIDS IN THE AU.

NOT ALSO SAYING THE SHIT W FELIX AN OSWALD WAS RAW PROOF THAT THEY WERE NOTHING BUT THE DOGSHIT YAOI PLOT FOR TGR. ITS SO GROSS YYUCK

Cups pisses me off sm in that au but not bc he was annoying, but cause he was watered down to a sex martyr who bangs the loli of the crew. bringing it up again, as a hypersexual that shit makes me visceral, HOW DARE HER FOR DRAWING HIM LIKE THAT. AT ALL. I DO NOT FUUCKKKKING CARE IF THE "CUPS IS A BOYKISSER!!! UWU ALFA YAOI DADDY" CROWD IS ANGRY I WILL NEVER GET OVER HOW HE WAS DEPICTED IN THAT AU. EVER.

UGH.

I will keep writing an loving him, I WILL CAUSE HE DESERVES ATTENTION THAT WAS NEEDED FOR THE LONGEST TIME !! He'll always have a very special place in my heart an I will always value ppl who write him with care and attentiveness <3

Cuphead appreciates it too, I can't speak for him but Im most confident he likes your depiction of him, Ill let him say that for himself lmao

Absolutely !!! <33

It's interesting needing to be specific whenever I bring up a character, like I have to say "in Quest" basically any time I note something, because holy shit I'd sound insane if I said some of the shit that is canon in Quest without saying that.

Just imagine not knowing what Quest is but knowing what Bendy is and you hear "Yeah, Bendy is basically a playboy who acts like every women is walking boobs and he drinks a lot, he usually does all this around his 12 year old brother"..... you'd be so fucking horrified and confused as to where that fucking came from 💀💀

[miaiwonsjwo]

Hi!

I hope you are doing good :D

Im not sure if your requests are open but could I ask for Grell x reader (who likes to draw a lot and is very arty and reallt likes to draw her)

Mostly im a huge simp for Grell and she has my heart ❤

Thank you 🍓

hi hello! yes yes my requests are open! TYSM FOR REQUESTING GRELLLL AAAAAAA I LOVE WRITING HER<333 anyways, your request is my command🫡😌 HEREEEE WE GOOO (btw i was not sure if you wanted headcanons or a oneshot SO I COMBINED IT HOPE THATS OKAY!!!)

artsy!reader who draws grell often!

tw: none!

genre: fluffiesss

- OH SHE LOVES IT

- as soon as she discovers YOU BET SHE WILL BE POSING

- she’d just be working when you walked up to her and immediately she goes model mode

- is it very convenient while working?

- no

- but she’ll do it anyways

- tell her shes beautiful whenever<3

- *insert grell gushing*

- always sneaking up on you to see the drawings

- “PLEASE!!!! SHOW ME HOW THEY TURNED OUT!”

- she pulls the sketchbook out of ur hands bet

- thinks its adorable

- “so romantic~”

the sound of your pencil touching the paper made a soft scraping sound, filling the silence.

today was rather peaceful, not exactly what you were used to.

you were highly focused on grell’s figure, while she read through her reaper book one last time. you jumped at the sound of grell’s book slamming shut.

“well well, it seems our victim of today will be an easy job.” she said, smiling vigorously.

suddenly her eyes landed on you, who was clumsily hiding your stack of papers. her eyes were almost like two big question marks.

she made her way over to you slowly “what do you have there, darling~?”

laughing awkwardly, you pushed the papers further behind your back “nothing.” you stuttered.

suddenly grell lunged forwards, landing atop of you perfectly, trapping you between her arms.

“show me~! please??” she begged while giving you puppy eyes. but you refused to show her the papers.

grell decided she needed to take more drastic measures, and so she tried to grab the paper and pull it out of your hands.

“now now, let go darling.” her voice got a little more “aggressive” as she struggled to pull the paper from your hands.

“when’d you get this strong?!” pulling harder, until you let go.

“okay, okay! youre going to rip it!” you exclaimed as grell flew backward a little, excitedly looking at the papers, almost putting her face into them. she gasped.

“this - she paused in shock, it was almost sad, like no one ever did something sweet for her - this is me!” her eyes flicked from the papers to you and back to the papers as she started flipping them to see the other one, her mouth opened the entire time.

“oh sweety.. - she started - this is so good, and so sweet!” her eyes were a little teary. she lunged forward again, tackling you into a hug.

“i love you.” she whispered into your shoulder.

HI HELLO THANK YOU FOR READING<3 requests are still open but i will also be working on some of my own ideas! so it might be a little slower than usual! buttt i will first finish all the requests i had so far ofc!

yours truly,

[ariapmdeol]

tell me your Witch's heart theories pretty please

this is less a theory and more an analysis bc i've played bonus stage but not sirius conclusion! so here are my predictions/thoughts for the conclusions :] obligatory 'spoilers under the cut'!

overall: I think it absolutely makes sense that we start with Sirius's conclusion. He's been on Claire's side nearly the entire time, and has no desire for the Witch's heart. All Claire really needs to do is to sit down and have a proper conversation with him :] the real issue would be handling ashe and wilardo, hmmm.... I also assume the demon in the house by the bench is relevant (aka lady dorothy) bc gavi has drawn fanart of sirius next to that monster so OFC. OFC GAVI WOULD DRAW ANGST. IT HAS TO BE LADY DOROTHY

Likewise, it makes sense that Wilardo's conclusion is next. All we need to do to get HIM on our side is to give him the extra Witch's heart. Then he can die and it all works out!

I expect Ashe to be third. I DO think he'll be VERY difficult to manage-- he doesn't know that the WH can only grant negative wishes, so i suspect that he will... struggle with that realization. He's been latching onto this wish for so long that I'm not sure what he'll do with himself when forced to confront the grief that he's been trying to run away from ^_^ cannot wait to see him suffer it'll be GREAT. I do think we might have to get someone else on our side as a defender/protector from Ashe-- he might decide that two WH are more powerful than one, after all! I just want to see him morb <3

Noel HAS to be last. he HAS TO BE, his ONLY WISH IS FOR CLAIRE TO BE OKAY SO IT MAKES SENSE THAT HIS CONCLUSION WOULD COME LAST <333 his would be unquestionably sad-- i wonder what claire would want to wish for... im not sure how to give him a happy ending :( i would LOVE for him to be freed from hell but. thats still a POSITIVE WISH. WITCHS HEARTS CANT DO THAT,,

mechanics wise tho it ABSOLUTELY makes sense that Bonus stage and the conclusion are all separate games-- if we consider playing the base game over and over again to be the different loops (as you can always go replay a scenario that you've already unlocked, thus you as claire can keep looping), then it makes SENSE that bonus stage is separate; it IS a separate loop bc its meant to be the LAST one. Likewise, it makes sense for the conclusions to all be separate because they aren't MEANT to be connected in the same way that the scenarios are!

Likewise, I think it's impactful that we CANT give everyone a happy ending in the same route. we HAVE to choose, and that's so fascinating to me!