#it probably won't be done for a few more months bc I'm trying not to rush myself

[aroaessidhe]

I need to get better at posting about aspec books as I read them, not just quietly adding them to my database and mentioning in the bottom of my reviews lol so here's the last few months [no order]

The Keeper of Lonely Spirits - cozy fantasy. the MC is likely acespec - he's only been interested in two people in 200 years, mostly uncomfortable about it otherwise. (& I think I saw the author mention this also). He's gay and also immortal - and elderly, not like an immortal-20-year-old, which is nice. It's vague/brief enough that I probably would not read it for aceness though.

I finally read the Villains duology, everyone knows about it, it's solid, only a brief direct mention of his asexuality in book 2 but the vibes are there throughout.

Be The Sea - a slow character focused scififantasy, with a demisexual (nonbinary, autistic) MC, and an ace SC. asexuality is discussed quite a bit in the book. lots of things are discussed. the book is mostly discussions.

The Fallow Year / Holy Terrors - end of the little thieves trilogy! Vanja and Emeric are still demisexual. they both explore some other relationships in TFY - I've seen some opinions that it felt 'not very demi' of them but imo the way it was depicted felt pretty clear on the difference of attraction vs action? I would have been happy with not as much focus on their relationship in the latter books but it's fine it's a good series

This Ends in Embers - end of a YA fantasy duology with dragons and sisters. one MC is demi. it's only briefly brought up but she has a romance subplot that it's lightly woven into.

Kiss Me, Maybe - contemporary romance with a greyace lesbian MC. I wrote a bit in my review here, it's not bad

The End Crowns All - YA Cassandra/Helen Greek retelling fantasy with a sex-favourable ace lesbian MC. bit too long and slow for me, but her ace journey was nice.

Wearing The Lion - heracles retelling, aroace author, athena (minor character) is alloace which is briefly discussed in a scene. probably won't put this in my database, just mentioning it here tho

Cradle and Grave - postapoc horror with an aroace character - just a single mention. no romance.

The Ocean Hugs Hard - historical mystery w a bit of cosmic horror, ace man MC. the depiction of his asexuality felt pretty true to the historical setting and was decent and complex, just didn't love the book.

Limitless: Poetry of an Aromantic & Asexual Journey - what it says on the tin. i'm not really a poetry person

What Wakes The Bells - YA fantasy with a demisexual girl MC, m/f. I liked how it emphasised the friendship aspect of their relationship just as much. her brother is also aroace. the book was just okay.

We Are Villains - YA mystery/thriller from Kacen Callender. the main MC is aroace, briefly explored. very glad for more Black aspecs from a Black author! the book was.....okay.

Vagabonds! - great Nigerian contemporary fantasy with a couple of ace/aroace coded characters in the ensemble cast, though only really discussed in a few paragraphs. very good book.

Unbury The Bones / Boneless - a couple very short cozy fantasy mystery novellas about an aromantic vampire & the werewolf who's trying so so hard to be their friend

That’s What She Said - contemporary novel about two friends in their 20s, one is demisexual. it is very focused on her demisexuality which is done pretty well imo, unfortunately the other MC is arospec coded and then villainised for it (aromanticism is never brought up. it's just commitment issues or whatever, eyeroll)

The Chronicles of Nerezia - not new, I just read the most recent two books. 3 aroaces and a lesbian going on adventures and playing so many board games and trying to save the world

Come Drink With Me - chinese fairytale vibe novella about two immortals who live/work at an opera house, who are both aromantic. this isn't new I just reread it bc i've been meaning to for a while! read my bestie's books 🫵

Children of Ruin - unexpected major character in book 2 of this trilogy is mentioned to be asexual (implied aro). very much the asocial mad scientist stereotype and only mentioned the once, I wouldn’t really call this good representation. But I do like this kind of character and I also liked the books, so,

Black Salt Queen - again unexpected, a side character is an aroace woman. (just mentioned once). fingers crossed POV in book 2? idk

A Stage Over Ruthless Stars - YA sci-fi with an aroallo MC and gay MC. his being aro is pretty much just mentioned the once. the other MC also expresses disinterest in amatonormative 'when you settle down with a partner in the future' rhetoric. no romance.

Hallowed Be Her Flesh - another monster romance/erotica from emryn bird, sapphic with an ace MC and asexual-species angel LI

a couple books I've heard/ been reminded about recently and are on my hopefully-near-future tbr:

The Star Crossed Empire - space opera with an ace MC

The Map And The Territory - high fantasy with aroace MC(s?), been vaguely on my tbr for ages but I just got a copy.

A Crimson Covenant - sapphic vampire/werewolf romance, I believe one is demisexual

Threads of the City - demiromantic ace MC

Demon Song - an ace MC, I think

That Devil Ambition - it's a linsey miller book I'm sure there's an ace girl in there somewhere

Painted Flock - obviously! I always forget about books I designed when im book blogging lmao

Rising Ashes - Fallen Thorns sequel, aroace MC

One Morning Sun - book 3 in the Sãoni Cycle! aroallo & alloace MCs

(there are obviously MANY more I know about these are just. I do actually plan to read these soon)

[louisliamforever]

.

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Cramps

Summary: After going off of birth control, your periods have been a little more intense than you're used to. What starts out as a stressful morning between you and your husband, very quickly turns into a night that bodes very well for the both of you.

Paring: Husband Frankie Morales x Wife f!reader (no use of y/n)

Word Count: 5.4K on the dot (idk how we got here)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) PERIOD SEX, unprotected p in v sex (do better, but also they want a baby so), vaginal fingering, oral (f receiving, again, you're on your period but our pussy eating king Fransisco Morales is an unstoppable force of nature), creampie, praise kink, big fat nasty breeding kink (it's who I am now, I won't apologize for it), Frankie's got a NASTY mouth, Frankie is the best husband, reader is on her period/has period symptoms, talks about family planning/not being on birth control, use of nicknames (hermosa, quierda, cariño), reader has no physical descriptions besides that she can wear Frankie's clothes

A/N: Well... This was gonna be a drabble... and then it was just gonna be fluff.... and then it was gonna be just some implied smut... and now, we're here??? Idk, don't ask me 🥴 self indulgent bc I just finished my period (and my periods have been whack since stopping bc) and what better way to heal myself than imagining what Frankie would be like taking care of you 🥺 also pls be nice to me this is my first time writing Frankie and I'm v nervous EEK I hope you enjoy!!! sorry Javi bby, I still love u

Bitchy. 

You wished you had a better word to describe your mood for today, but truth be told, bitchy was by far the most accurate. 

You and Frankie were hoping to start trying for your first baby soon, and had recently gone off your birth control after your doctor had told you it may take a few months for your body to regulate itself before you had a better chance at getting pregnant. Your doctor had also  warned you about many of the symptoms and side effects that stopping the pill could have, one of those being becoming more aware of your emotions and mood swings throughout your cycle. That, you were prepared for. 

What you were not prepared for, was to feel like an absolute psychopath in the days leading up to your period. 

 Your cycle had  been wonky the past few months as your body began to sort itself out- you had a feeling your period was probably about to start soon, but hadn’t thought much about it, considering your terrible and grouchy mood had overshadowed it. You had tried your best to pull yourself together the past few days, chalking up your grumpiness to long hours at work, or just being in a weird funk, but today, you woke up with a fire in your gut, ready to fight, and poor Frankie was about to be your punching bag. 

Sweet Frankie had been nothing short of a saint when it came to just about anything, but dealing with your newly heightened emotions right before your period really should have earned him some sort of Presidential Medal of Bravery, considering that your newly discovered highs and lows while PMS-ing were just as frightening as any time he had spent during his time in the military. 

Unfortunately for your husband, despite his best efforts, he had been on your nerves all morning. Not because he was really doing anything wrong, but because the little things that you were normally so good about letting go, or the patience you frequently had seemed to have flown out the window, and you were convinced that if Frankie even breathed the wrong way, you were going to absolutely lose it. 

So when unsuspecting Frankie decided to ask you a simple request about after work plans, there was very little he could have done to prepare for your response. 

“Morning, Hermosa.” Frankie cooed, emerging into the kitchen, his hand rustling through his untamed, sleepy brown curls as he let out a yawn and a stretch, the slight softness of his stomach peeking out between his t-shirt and pajama pants as he raised his arms above his head before settling behind you. He wrapped himself around your waist, pressing a gentle kiss into your shoulder as you finished putting the last of your lunch in your bag for work, trying to force yourself to focus on his sweet good morning, rather than the empty bowl of cereal in the sink that had greeted you first thing when you woke up, already starting you off on the wrong foot in your already irritable mood. 

“Morning, babe.” You grinned, forcing yourself to forgo the annoyance hidden behind your smile as you pecked a quick kiss on Frankie’s lips before gathering the rest of your things for the day scattered across the kitchen table. “Sorry, I didn’t have time to make you breakfast this morning because I was running late, but there’s extra scrambled eggs on the stove if you want them. I’m really sorry, Frankie, I gotta head out, have a good day, I’ll see you later okay?” You sighed, slinging your work bag over your shoulder, your hands full of your coffee mug, water bottle and keys, your cluttered grip and running behind schedule only adding to your frustration. 

“All good, Querida, no worries. Hey, actually baby, before you leave,” He paused, setting down the coffee mug he was just about ready to take a sip of, as if a little lightbulb had just gone off in his brain, “do you mind picking up stuff to make that really good buffalo chicken dip for Benny’s tonight? I told ‘em we’d bring like, an appetizer or something, if that’s okay.” 

For Frankie’s sake, you couldn’t have been more thankful that you had your back turned to him, because if looks could kill, Frankie Morales would have been a dead man. 

Every rational part of your brain knew that even though his request perhaps wasn’t the best timing, stopping by the store and making dip to bring to Benny’s for game night really wasn’t that much time or effort out of your day. But today, it seemed like every part of your brain but the rational one seemed to be functioning properly, and the raging, irrational part might as well have heard that Frankie wanted you to prepare and cook a Thanksgiving meal for 74 after you got home from work. 

You took a deep breath, your grip tightening around the items in your hand, praying with every bone in your body that someway or another, you had misheard your husband. 

“Tonight? As in, like, today, after I get home from work?” You questioned, trying to do your best to keep your tone from sounding too condescending. 

“Yeah, we don’t have to be there until 7, I just don’t think I’m gonna have time to since I probably won’t be outta work until 6:30.” He shrugged nonchalantly, taking another swig of his coffee 

Oh yeah, you’d heard him right.  

You let out a deep sigh, even more over dramatic than you had intended it to be, arms crossed over your chest and stark frown spread across your face as you turned towards Frankie. 

“Oh, perfect! That’s a great thing for me to find out about at 7:45 A.M. the day of, Frank!” Your voice oozed with ferocious sarcasm, now slamming your things back down onto the table to run your hands over your face. “No, that’s great, because there’s nothing I wanted to do more than to come home and make buffalo chicken dip instead of all the other shit I needed to do today before we left! Amazing! Thank you!” 

At this point, you were almost positive that if your eyes rolled any further, they’d be in the back of your skull, letting out another angry huff as you shook your head at Frankie, who was looking absolutely petrified as he leaned back against the counter, eyes darting to the floor to avoid yours, running his hand over the wispy curls at the nape of his neck. Frankie began to stammer, trying to defend himself from your wrath. 

“Hermosa, I’m- I’m sorry? I know it’s last minute, but you normally make it every time we go over there, I just- I figured it’d be easy for you to do? You can get something else, or I can try to stop by the store really quick on the way home, I just might-” 

“Nope, you want buffalo chicken dip, apparently I’m making buffalo chicken dip!” You groaned, collecting everything back into your hands, swearing under your breath as you tried to balance everything in your grip. “Jesus, okay, I need to go to work, just- I don’t even know. I gotta go, Frankie.” 

“Querida, I-” Frankie pleaded, beginning to trail behind you as you made your way to the front door. 

“Frankie, whatever, it’s fine! I’ll make the stupid dip! I have to go to work, I’ll see you later.” You could feel the muscles in your jaw beginning to clench as you gritted your teeth, trying with everything in you to keep from exploding as you headed out of the house. Without even a kiss goodbye, you left Frankie in the doorway, watching you throw your things in the car and slam the door behind you as you drove down the driveway. 

But as soon as you were on the road and your house was out of view, you could instantly feel the tears beginning to well in your eyes, slowly streaming down your cheeks as you began to sob, wondering why you had ruined the morning over as stupid as an appetizer, and even worse, that you had been a complete asshole to your husband about it. 

You couldn’t have been more thankful that work had been quiet today- no meetings on the schedule, and no one coming to bother you, leaving you plenty of peace and quiet to continue sulking and brooding in your unpleasant mood. 

Right around lunch time, you found yourself eating alone in your office, wishing your lunch was about ten times saltier and chocolatier than it was, crying to yourself as you watched a video of a dog meeting its new human sibling for the first time.

Just as you were beginning to pack up the rest of your lunch and start back up with your work, you felt a terrible twinge in your lower stomach that had you just about keeled over in pain, followed by that all too familiar feeling in your underwear. 

Frantically scrambling, you reached into your bag to pull out a tampon, hurriedly shuffling to the nearest bathroom, only to reveal the murder scene equivalent as you pulled down your pants. 

Your period had come.  

In that moment, as much as you were dreading the pain and misery that was the next few days to come, you couldn’t also help but feel a slight sense of relief, realizing that you were in fact, not actually a crazy person for the way you were feeling, you were just PMS-ing out of your mind. You couldn’t also help but feel absolutely awful for your unjustified freak out at your husband this morning, your heart sinking with guilt as you made your way back to your desk, immediately grabbing your phone to text Frankie. 

“Hey… I’m so sorry about this morning. What you were asking me to do wasn’t a big deal at all and I totally freaked out on you. My period just started, I think that’s why I’ve been such a bitch this morning. I’m sorry, Frankie, I love you.💕 ” 

It was almost instantly after you hit send that the reply bubble popped up in your message, your heart pounding anxiously waiting for your husband’s reply. 

“It’s okay, I kind of had a feeling 😉 babe, you weren’t being a bitch- I should have talked to you about it sooner. Shitty timing on my part. I’m sorry. I love you too, Querida.” 

Before you could even respond, another message popped up below his first. 

“Don’t worry about going to the store or making anything tonight. I already texted Benny and told him we couldn’t come. We can spend the night in, just the two of us. I can pick up takeout on the way home if you want and we can pick a movie to watch.” 

You could feel your frustrated facade beginning to melt away as your lips shifted from a pursed frown to a small smirk reading Frankie’s text, your thumbs quickly tapping across the screen of your phone to reply. 

“Thank you. You’re the best.” 

“Of course. Hopefully none of your co-workers ask you to make buffalo chicken dip before you leave 😘” 

“Oh shut up, meanie.” 

“Just kidding. Have a good rest of your day, love you. 💙

“Love you too. 🤍” 

Although the rest of your day was nowhere near enjoyable, given the fact you felt like you were getting punched repeatedly in the uterus and your personality resembled that of Oscar the Grouch, you knew that your night in with Frankie was your light at the end of the tunnel, and only needed to make it a few more hours before there was at least some sweet relief finally headed your way. 

Despite the constant stabbing pain in your lower stomach and back, your drive home from work had you in much better spirits than your drive there, now not only having an explanation as to why you had felt like such a mess, but also knowing the rest of your night was going to be dedicated to nothing but cuddling up in your comfiest clothes and snuggling up next to Frankie on the couch. 

As you pulled down your street, you were surprised to see Frankie’s truck already parked in the driveway, wondering what he was doing at home almost an hour earlier than he had mentioned he would be this morning. Gathering all of your things out of the back of your car, you quietly entered your home, confusion scrunching in your brow as you called out for your husband. 

“Frankie? Babe, are you home?” 

Before you could even kick off your shoes or hang up your coat, Frankie had already appeared at the front door to greet you, boyish grin spread across his face as he grabbed your things out of your hand, carefully placing them on your entryway table before engulfing you in a bear hug, his broad arms wrapping around your body and pulling you closer into his chest. 

You could feel all the muscles in your body instantly relax as your face rested against the soft cotton of his t-shirt, soaking in the familiar woody and savory scent of him, letting yourself be consumed by every ounce of his embrace. 

“Hi Hermosa.” Frankie cooed, pressing a soft kiss against your temple, running his hands up and down your back as you looked up at his sweet brown eyes shining down at you. 

“What are you doing home so early? I mean, not that I’m mad about it at all, I just thought you said that you had to work until 6:30 and-” 

“Told my boss I had to head out early for a family emergency.” Frankie smirked, laughing at you playfully rolling your eyes from his so-called excuse. 

“Last time I checked, your wife being a grump because she’s bleeding out of her cooch doesn’t classify as a family emergency, Fransisco.” You teased, giving him a little shove, making the two of you giggle in tandem. 

“Eh, close enough. I’m really sorry about this morning, querida. I was a dick for not talking to you about plans beforehand and just assuming you could go do it. It wasn’t fair of me.” 

“It’s okay, Frankie. What you were asking for wasn’t a big deal and I made it one because I’ve been a psycho all day. I’m sorry, too.” 

“Well,” Frankie paused, pressing another kiss onto your cheek, the width of his palm gently cradling your jaw as you stared up at him and his sympathetic smile, “number one, you are not a psycho. I can’t imagine how uncomfortable you must feel right now, so even if you were, I wouldn’t blame you one bit. Number two,” he paused again, shifting his kiss from your cheek to your lips, his thumb delicately swiping across your skin, “you’re my wife and I love you more than anything, and if I can take a little time off to help make you feel better, it’s the least I can do. So, why don’t you go change into something comfortable, and when you get back down here, I will have pizza and ice cream, whatever movie you wanna watch, and a back rub ready for you, okay?”   

“Okay. Thank you, Frankie. God, you’re the best.” You grinned, pressing up on your tiptoes to let your mouth meet Frankie’s, the plush pout of his bottom lip swiping across yours, lingering just long enough to let the butterflies in your stomach begin to swirl, heat creeping through your cheeks in the tenderness of the moment.

“Of course, cariño. Te amo. Now go get changed.” With one last peck on his lips, you wiggled out of Frankie’s grasp to make your way up the stairs, grinning to see that your husband had already set out your favorite of his oversized sweatshirts and sweatpants, neatly folded on the bed for you to grab, quickly shuffling out of your uncomfortable work attire and exchanging it for Frankie’s clothes, your smile growing even wider at the feeling of perpetually being wrapped up in the essence of him. 

As you made your way back downstairs to meet Frankie, you found your heart skipping a beat again to see that the better part of the living room had been turned into a cozy sanctuary- lights dim and candles lit, both parts of your couch squished together, filled with every pillow and blanket you owned, and Frankie sitting in the middle, giant box of pizza, tub of ice cream and your handsome husband waiting for you. 

As if your emotions hadn’t already taken you on a wild roller coaster of a ride today, the adorable sight in front of you had you on the verge of tears again, wiping the wetness pooling in your eyes with the back of Frankie’s sweatshirt sleeve drooping off your arm before crawling into the blanket fort he had constructed for the two of you. 

“Frankie… You didn’t have to do this.” You sniffled, curling up next to Frankie as he draped a blanket over your lap and his arm over your shoulder, passing you a plate with 2 large pieces of pizza. 

“It’s the least I could do. I put on Hercules for us to watch, but if you wanna-” 

Before you could let him finish the rest of his sentence, you were running your hand across the scratchy stubble of his cheek, pulling his face closer to yours as you planted a kiss on his lips, feeling your smiles melt into one another's as your mouths met. “That sounds perfect. God, how’d I get so lucky?” 

“I could say the same thing, mi amor. You ready to start the movie?” 

“Only if you also pass me that tub of Ben and Jerry’s to go with my pizza.” 

“I think I can make that happen.” 

About half way through the movie, pizza and tub of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, your and Frankie’s bodies were tangled together in a sea of limbs and blankets, contently snuggled up with one another as Frankie’s fingers traced lazy circles on your back and shoulder as you laid against his chest. 

“You doin’ okay, querida? Need anything?” He cooed, his soft voice dancing in your ear. As if it weren’t enough that you had already been through the extreme highs and lows of almost every feeling under the sun today, the one you hadn’t been until this very moment was insatiably horny. While the mood swings you had mentally prepared yourself for with your new period symptoms, the constant other kind of ache between your legs you had not, and feeling the low rasp of Frankie’s words tickling your neck had been just enough to flip the switch to make you desperately needy. 

Letting your leg slide over Frankie’s lap, you pushed yourself up to straddle his hips, running your hands through the dark curls of his thick, brown hair, and down his broad chest, your fists bunching the worn fabric of his shirt in your hands as your mouths became a mess of tangled tongues and teeth. 

“I need- fuck- I need you, Frankie, please.” You pleaded between muffled moans, his tongue swiping in the parted space where your lips melted together as one, instinctively beginning to grind your hips into his, feeling the bulge in his sweatpants starting to grow beneath you. 

“Fuck- You sure, baby?” Frankie rasped, reactively bucking up into you, making you whine as his hands dug into your hips, guiding you as you swirled over the tented fabric of his bottom half rubbing against your covered core. 

“Please. Please, Frankie.” You were all but whimpering at this point, nodding frantically in approval as Frankie used the grasp on your hips to guide you onto your back, making you cock your head in confusion as Frankie scampered to the other side of the couch, back turned to you as he reached over the ledge, pulling out a thick, black towel with a smug grin on his face. “Did you seriously have a towel ready incase I wanted to have sex?” You snorted, shaking your head at Frankie, now crawling back to you, caging your body under his with an electric kiss as he shimmied the towel underneath you. 

“Maybe.” Frankie smirked, breaking from your kiss to let his lips trail down your body, his hands toying with the edge of his sweatshirt covering your body as he pushed it up your stomach and chest, helping you to shimmy it over your head, leaving your top half exposed. He gently palmed at your breasts, taking each pebbled nipple in his mouth, sucking and flicking at the buds with his tongue before letting his kisses travel down the soft skin of your stomach and waistband of your sweatpants. The clothes on your bottom half soon joined your sweatshirt in a crumpled pile as Frankie nestled himself between your legs, gently nudging your hips to let your thighs part, revealing your pussy, slick and shiny for him with your juices. 

Even though Frankie would eat you out for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a late night snack, you couldn’t help but feel guilty that he still found himself between your legs during your time of the month, considering any other man probably would have scoffed at just the thought of going down on you on your period. 

But, then again, Frankie Morales wasn’t just any other man. 

“Frankie, baby, you know you don’t- Oh fuck!” You gasped, cut off in surprise as Frankie’s tongue licked a long, broad strip across your cunt, making you shudder in pleasure as his head perked up, revealing the devilish grin spread between his cheeks watching your chest already heave in heavy, shaky breaths. 

“Oh I know I don’t have to, sweet girl. But I want to. Relax, baby, lemme take care of you.” 

Before you could agree, protest, or anything in between, Frankie was back between your legs, arms wrapped around your thighs as they draped over his broad shoulders, digging his fingertips into the plush softness of your skin, dragging his tongue through your folds with the exact grace and precision that he knew made you fall apart in seconds. 

With flat, firm presses of his mouth latched against your clit, you could already feel your bottom half writhing under him, the perfect pressure of his tongue dancing around your sensitive bundle of nerves making you moan in pleasure. As your head dipped back, falling into the couch pillow behind you, your hand shot down, fingers burying themselves in the wild curls of Frankie’s hair, tugging at the thick ends for any sort of release as he worked relentlessly at your aching cunt. 

“Fuck, Frankie, oh fuck- Fuck, baby, you feel so good.” You whined, your praise only intensifying the way your husband drank every ounce of you up, two thick fingers now gently pressing inside your heat, curled deliciously as they rocked in and out of your entrance, nudging against your g-spot. 

Frankie had spent enough time worshiping the altar that was your pussy to know exactly how to make you crumble beneath him, leaving you chanting his name like a prayer as his lips latched around your clit, ferociously sucking as his fingers prodded at the soft, spongy spot that made your cunt begin to clench and heat in your belly pool. 

“That’s it, Hermosa. I know you’re close, baby girl. Let me feel you, mi amor. I’ve got you.” Frankie groaned, his words humming deep in his chest, placing chaste kisses on the inside of your thighs before drinking you up like a man starved, adding a third finger into your heat, the added fullness and stretch, combined with Frankie’s relentless pace, enough to have the tingle that had been building at the base of your spine now washing through every inch of your body. Your orgasm began to crash through you, your pussy fluttering as pleasure radiated in your veins, making you cry out Frankie’s name over and over. 

Frankie worked persistently through your high, only pulling back after making sure that you had cum again, sitting back on his haunches as he admired the blissed out and ragged mess you had become, your pussy slick and swollen as your chest rose and fell in wrecked inhales and exhales, trying to compose yourself from the Frankie and fucked you senseless with just his tongue. 

Wiping the slick and juices glistening in his mustache with the back of his hand, Frankie tugged the sweatshirt covering his own body over his head, followed by his pants and boxers, freeing his painfully hard cock as it slapped against his stomach, his tip red and leaking with precum as his broad body loomed over yours, sucking and nipping at your pulse point as you whimpered his name. 

“Frankie, holy fuck.” 

“Such a good girl for me, querida. You still want me to fuck you, baby?” He mewled, the metallic and tangy taste of you still lingering on his tongue as he kissed you, laughing to himself at the way you found yourself frantically nodding your head to tell him yes before your words could. 

“Jesus Christ, yes. Fuck, please Frankie, I need to feel you.” 

Reaching down to stroke himself, he lined his cock up with your entrance, easily sliding into your heat and brushing his tip against your cervix, taking a moment to let you adjust to his fullness. The whine you let out as Frankie filled every inch of you was nothing short of ragged, digging your nails into the skin of his broad back as he ever so slowly began to thrust in and out of you, dragging his length against the slick of your cunt. 

“Oh fuck me- Fuck, you hear how wet you are for me, sweet girl? This what you needed, baby? To fill up that pretty little pussy of yours?” Frankie groaned, letting his forehead rest against yours, his sweaty curls now starting to stick to his skin as he pounded into you, rutting his hips at a faster and faster pace. 

“It’s all for you, Frankie- Oh shit- only for you.” You moaned, your fingers wrapping around the width of his biceps, flexing deliciously as he hovered over you, sucking you in to a long, deep kiss, fucking into you over and over. 

Even with the years between you and the ring on your finger, the possessive part of Frankie’s brain would never get over how the primal and all consuming feeling of knowing you were his, forever, your words shooting straight to his dick as a low groan rumbled in his chest, silently cursing to himself through gritted teeth, watching you fall apart below him. 

Readjusting himself, Frankie sat back on his heels, hooking his arm under one of your legs to drape it over his shoulder, the new angle stretching you out in a way that had you seeing stars as Frankie rammed into your g-spot and began thumbing at your clit, still swollen and sensitive from your first orgasm. You could already feel the heat beginning to bloom in your belly once again, your leg beginning to tremble hoisted over Frankie’s shoulder as he dug into the meat of your thigh with a bruising intensity. 

Just like he would never get over the fact of knowing you were his, Frankie would never get over watching you begin to crumble under his touch, taking the time to memorize every twitch and twinge your body made as you came closer and closer to your end, always savoring in the moaning mess you’d become as you fell apart around him. 

“Fuck, Frankie, Fuck, oh my god- I’m close, baby.” You were all but rambling at this point, your brain barley stringing together coherent sentences as you felt your cunt beginning to clench around his cock, the lewd noises of your moans, wetness and skin slapping together as your hips met filling the room at a borderline pornagraphic rate. 

“Meirda, I’m not gonna last much longer, hermosa. Fuck, where do you want me, baby?” Frankie growled through gritted teeth, his eyes locking on yours and telling him everything he needed to know without you saying a word. 

“Inside. Fuck, please Frankie, I want you to cum inside me.” 

Your confirmation was all it took to flip the switch in Frankie that sent him absolutely feral, the thought of being able to actually knock you up now that you weren’t on birth control anymore, giving you a baby, proving another way to the world to mark you as his? The thought alone was enough to have him bracing every bone in his body to keep him from cuming right then and there. 

“Fuck me. You want me to fill you up, querida? Fuck me full of you? Fuck a baby into you? That's what you want, huh?” Frankie moaned, grunting with each thrust of his hips, his rhythm becoming more frantic and shaky as he felt your pussy begin to flutter around him, pressing the pads of his fingers against your clit, swirling them in frantic circles to make sure you came before he did. 

“Fuck, yes. I need you too, holy fuck- wanna make you a daddy, Fransisco.” 

You could feel the tightly wound knot in your core starting to snap, your legs trembling and breath shaking as Frankie fucked into you, finding yourself on the verge of collapse- but not before Frankie’s filthy mouth got the last word in. 

“Jesus, fuck- Fuck, hermosa. That’s what you want, pretty girl? I swear, I’m gonna fuck myself so deep into you it’ll fucking take. Get you fucking pregnant tonight.” 

That was all it took to have you orgasm come crashing through you, every inch of your body radiating with pleasure as you came, crying out Frankie’s name as you gushed around him, your eyes practically rolling to the back of your head, your mind going blank and numb, the only thing grounding you were the incoherent ramblings of your husband as he followed suit behind you. 

“Fuck, that’s it, baby. Fuck, I’m gonna cum too, fuck, fuck-ahhhhhh.” With one final thrust, Frankie could feel himself spilling against your walls, coating you with his spend as his cock pulsed, making sure he milked himself of every last drop deep inside your cunt before even thinking about pulling out. Moving your leg, Frankie slumped into you, splaying himself across your body as your chests rose and fell in sync, laying in silence as you let your breathing steady, coming back down to Earth from your high. 

With a shallow grunt, Frankie carefully pulled his softening cock out of your heat, leaning back to admire the mess he had made between your legs, his cum dripping down the inside of your thighs and pussy glistening with the mixture of your arousal. You let out a soft hiss at the loss of Frankie’s fullness inside you, only to quickly be replaced by a gasp as he buried his two fingers back into your cunt.  

“Gotta make sure every last drop stays in there, hermosa. Gonna keep you full of me all night, baby.” He mewled, carefully gathering his spend and pushing it deep inside you, making you whimper as he slowly pulsed his fingers back and forth, pulling away his hand to lean back into your body, engulfing you with an electric kiss. 

“Holy fuck, fuck me. Jesus, Frankie.” You laughed to yourself, your head dipping back on the pillow as you buried your face in your hands, at a loss for words at how euphoric you now felt in your post colital bliss. 

“Wow, again, already? Gotta give me a few after that querida.” He smirked, making you roll your eyes at his joke as you playfully swatted at him, making him lean in to pepper your body with kisses, leaving you squealing and squirming in delight. 

“You are absolutely ridiculous, Fransisco Morales. If you keep fucking me like that, then yeah, absolutley.” 

“If I keep fucking you like this, I have a very hopeful feeling that next month, we’ll have something else to care about besides period cramps.”

“I swear to god, if one of my cravings ends up being buffalo chicken dip once I’m pregnant, I’m gonna be pissed.”

Taglist:

@bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog @jaciejay13 @poodlebae @gobaaby-blog-blog @lola8888673 @persephone-girl @copperhalfcent @innerpersonunknown @messinadresss @devineconjuring @endlessthxxghts @cool-iguana @rhoorl @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @messinadress @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @ilovepedro @pascalscoffin @missladym1981 @munson-hargrove-barnes86 @angel98624 @anoverwhelmingdin @pimosworld @nandan11 @iloveenya @survivingandenduring

[lotus-pear]

YAAAAAYYYY ITS FINALLY HERE!!! ty guys sm again for 5k i rly appreciate it <3

rules and guidelines under the cut!

rules and due date (i've never done this before so bear w me ok!!):

-due date will be march 1st! i will accept entries a few days late dw i'm nor ur professor or smth BUT I WOULD RLY PREFER IF U GET IT DONE BY THEN (just dm me if u need more time)

-pls tag ur finished piece under #lotuspear5kdtiys and dont forget to mention my user @lotus-pear! if i neglect to reblog ur piece then pls lmk even though that probably won't happen bc i'll be checking that tag every day for new entries👹

-pls don't trace the art.. i'll be really sad if u do that :(((( if u need help at all w the posing or hands then shoot me an ask or weed ur way into my dms bc ik this is kind of a complicated piece

-anyone can participate!! u don't have to be following me or anything and it's fine if we've never interacted before

-colors and expression are completely flexible and i'd even encourage playing around w it since the final product isn't meant to mimic my style. if u can then pls try to keep the pose relatively similar although i don't mind if it's changed a little bit. whatever is most comfortable to u as the artist.

-if u guys want to see the piece without any shading or rendering then pls dm me, ik it might be easier for some ppl to just see the bare sketch or the lineart w base colors

prizes🤩 (ik this is what u guys are rly after /j):

-alr so ik everybody's all like "well what's in this for me🤨" oh my god if u would just let me explain 😐 i'll be choosing three winners and two honorable mentions amongst all the contestants

-the top three winners get a follow (yea ok kinda sucky but wtv) AND they get to commission a fully rendered piece from me of a single character of their choice for free >:) (i'll discuss the details w the winners in two months)

-the two runner ups will also get a follow from me AND they get to commission a sketch of a single character from me (again, i'll discuss what this entails in further detail when the honorable mentions are selected in two months)

————

ermmm yea i think thats it for now i'll come back and edit the post if i feel the need to add anything.. HAVE FUN GUYS I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT U GUYS DO🫶🏼🫶🏼

[pomefioredove]

May I have a chocolate cookie n 3 with chocolate chips and marshmallows 😋

omg I haven't done an RSA reader in a long time but this is perfecttt!! good lord I'm ngl to you guys I live for drama like this, I know che'nya isn't as popular in the fandom but this is worth reading bc I had TOO much fun writing it

order #3, chocolate with chocolate chips, marshmallows

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ especially when upside down

summary: no one ever said that being riddle's ex would be easy tropes: roommate au, fake dating characters: chenya additional info: romantic, gender neutral reader, reader is not yuu, reader is from RSA, riddleyuu real, probably ooc, PDA and kissing warning (this CORNBALL)

Being Che'nya's roommate for the past three years, you've been involved in your fair share of pranks and ploys.

This is, by far, the dumbest.

"This is an awful idea," you say, letting him fiddle with your frilly tie. "He'll be too busy with the festivities, anyway, maybe we should just-"

He pushes a finger to your lips and shushes you, shutting you up.

"You worry more than an elder oyster," Che'nya chides. "Let's be off."

He cavorts you through the gates of Night Raven College, a place you seldom visit- at least, nowadays.

"I just don't think this is the right way to rekindle with Riddle,"

He smirks, his fangs poking his lower lip. "All ways are right ways,"

To him, at least. You drag your feet through the curious crowds, their sharp-toothed smiles taunting you. You probably won't even see Riddle, you reason with yourself. He's probably busy. Yeah! You won't even-

"Che'nya! And- ah! It's you!"

Damn it all.

Riddle might be working, but Trey-

"Wow, it's been a few months, huh?" the vicewarden smiles. "I, uh... wasn't expecting you. Riddle's running a few last-minute checks with the presenters, and then we're all heading to the VDC. You can walk with us."

"No," you say.

"Yes!" Che'nya counters.

Trey smiles and shakes his head. "You two make... an interesting pair. How you ended up so close is a mystery, even to me,"

Che'nya grins. "You might even say we're-"

You slap a hand over his overeager lips and give Trey an awkward smile. "W-we should start walking!"

Trey seems wary, but he is, as always, too polite to ask. The three of you start walking, and with each step, your stomach sinks lower and lower. Why'd you let him talk you into this?

It takes almost ten minutes to reach the coliseum. Night Raven College is much larger than it looks from the outside... or perhaps you just feel very small.

"Alright, Riddle should be around here somewhere..." Trey says, his hand shielding his eyes from the sun. "Ah, there they are."

They? You follow his eyes to Riddle, as red-haired and overdressed as you remember, talking to someone scrappy, scrawny, and nearly his height.

"Who's that?" you ask. Che'nya blows air in your ear, bothering you to say he's unhappy with your lack of attention on him.

Trey leads you to the two, as if marching into battle. "That's the Prefect," he says. "They and Riddle are..."

He hesitates, his eyes darting to the way Che'nya is tugging on your hair to avoid your pout.

"They're what, Trey?"

"Uh... close. Here we are!"

Upon hearing his voice, Riddle turns towards Trey, and the rest of you. He's smiling, his cheeks are round and plump, his face full of color. He looks... happy. It's strange.

...His hand is tightly around theirs. The Prefect.

Your stomach turns.

"Ah, you're all here," Riddle says. He eyes the way Che'nya is leaning on your shoulder. He doesn't say a word about it. "...Uh, a... pleasure... to see you again."

"And you," you say. Che'nya sets a hand on your waist, as if daring someone to ask.

And you stick out your hand, desperately trying to prevent that. "I-I don't think we've met," you say, to the Prefect. "I'm a... a... friend of Riddle's."

They smile. They're sweet, so unlike the other Night Raven students you've met.

"Oh, nice! And you know Trey and Che'nya, too?"

Che'nya perks up. "One might say that we-"

"WE'RE ROOMMATES!" you spit out, preventing him from saying any more than that.

The Prefect smiles awkwardly and shakes your hand. You can just tell they're thinking "these people are weird."

"You go to school here?" you ask. Surely not. If they did, someone would have told you about them by now. Or you've just been spending way too much time with Che'nya...

They nod. "Oh, yes. A few months now. You must go to Royal Sword, right?"

"That's right," you say, crossing your arms. Che'nya teasingly bites your shoulder. No one brings it up. "How do you know Riddle?"

"Oh, it's a... long story," they laugh. "We-"

"We're partners," Riddle interrupts, crossing his arms in parody of your pose. Your knees are knocking together. Why is this so hard?

Che'nya sets his chin on your shoulder, smiling. You don't stop him from speaking this time. "Ah, you too?"

Trey takes a step back, as if planning his escape. You can sympathize with that.

""Too?" Meaning what, now?" Riddle responds, his eyes narrowing.

"We've been tithering to tell you," says the cat. "But we wanted to wait. Where's the fun in no surprise?"

"Enough of this. Spit it out, what's it mean?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

Without so much as a warning (though it might've been brought to your attention with tap of his fingertip on your lips), Che'nya kisses you. On the mouth. In front of everyone.

When he pulls away, Riddle looks more appalled than envious. Trey has backed himself into the wall, and the Prefect is blushing.

"...I see," Riddle says, eyes wide. "You never were one for following social conventions, Che'nya. I wish you the best. Just... don't... do that in front of me again."

"The Prefect should head inside!" Trey blurts out, "Vil is probably looking for them!"

Thank the Sevens. "O-oh- right!" they say, "I-I'll see you all at the VDC!"

They stumble away, obviously just as taken aback as Riddle. Maybe they're meant for each other, after all, you think. You're not as revolted by the idea as before. Che'nya's hand is still on your waist.

"...Go, Night Raven," Trey says, weakly.

Che'nya's chin sits on your shoulder again, and he smiles. You scoff, finding your confidence. "...Royal Sword Academy is a shoe-in for the win,"

"I wouldn't be so sure," Riddle mutters, smoothing out his clothing as if it'll help him with his composure. "Vil Schoenheit is a formidable trainer."

Your eyes dart to the door which the Prefect- Riddle's partner- had run into.

"Mm, but they're right, of course," Che'nya purrs, his arms around your waist. "RSA will win by a hare... I mean, a hair. The heart always wins over the head... especially when upside down."

Riddle rolls his eyes. You smile. "That, I understand,"

[hwanchaesong]

━⁠☞🍽️ Second Course: He treats you so well, and you're naive enough to believe that only you have the key to his tasty heart. Or his pants. 🥢

🎧: Olivia Rodrigo - Traitor

wc: 1.0k

genre & warnings: angst, some fluff, mentions of sex, cursing, crying, there's another girl, lovers to exes, pure heartbreak :D , Yeji of ITZY special appearance etc etc

a/n: this is a part of The Sour Restaurant series. if y'all want, you can read the other album inspired fics of other groups here.

ps. i've already reposted this but it still won't appear under the tags that i've put so ig i'll just let it be lmao. imma just post it the way it is bc i'm tired of trying and thinking on what to do to make it work.

At the tender age of 13, you took note of everything that was written in an article that you accidentally opened and read on a fishy website entitled, 'Signs that your partner is falling out of love.'

You thought it would help you avoid conflict with a future partner, it would help you evade an impending heartbreak, but nothing can prepare you for the real world, it seems.

Your boyfriend, Park Seonghwa, was the definition of a picture perfect man.

He's kind, respectful and loving. He had all the love languages.

He never shunned away from skinship, and most of the time, he's the one who's initiating it. Giving you hugs and kisses even in public without any ounce of shame.

Even when he's busy, he still gives you the time of his day. Often, he would choose to lose sleep if it means that he'll be able to talk and see you after a long, tiring day at work.

He's also the type to buy 'just because' gifts. Randomly walking around a park then he'll see this cute bunny keychain, buying it immediately so he can give it to you because the bunny reminds him of you.

Fixing collars, tying shoelaces, cooking you food— he does it all, and naturally too. The way he pampers you like a mother hen is the sweetest thing you have ever seen in a man.

The most important thing though? It's his ability to listen and soothe all your worries away. He tells you that if you're overthinking, you can simply say it to him and he'll gladly give you all the assurance that you need.

So, what went wrong? Where did it go wrong? Is there something wrong with you?

The situation at hand made you question yourself, then again, are you really the problem here?

"The least you can give me is a reasonable explanation!" you yelled, gripping Seonghwa's arm that was holding his suitcase, attempting to stop him from leaving you without any form of closure.

"Well, what do you want me to say?" he snapped, raising his usual soft voice at you, something that he has never done before.

"A reason! Explanation, anything! Why are you suddenly breaking up with me?!" you blinked rapidly, the itchiness in your throat makes it harder for you to breathe, and the sinking feeling of dread in your stomach is urging you to vomit.

This is so fucking messed up.

Just last night, Seonghwa was fine. He even made love to you in your shared bed, whispering how good you are for him.

Last week, he brought you flowers. Last last week, he took you to a nice restaurant for dinner. Last month, he took you to Maldives for a summer getaway.

Nothing changed and everything felt the same, thus, the current happenings don't make sense.

You come home from work and the next thing you know, your significant other of how many years are mumbling nonsense of going separate ways. That you two are better off without the other.

You just don't fucking understand what the hell went wrong.

"I don't love you anymore."

You never knew that a mere sentence that is composed of five words is more than enough to break your heart, your world.

He doesn't love you anymore?

"Since when?" you weakly muttered, wanting answers that will probably hurt you more.

"For the last few months."

You winced, there were no signs of him not loving you. He must be lying, his shaky chocolate orbs say otherwise.

"Okay." you speak, no more energy to fight for him, to fight for a battle that is not worth the blood, sweat, and tears.

Just like that, you watched him walk away. Out of your home, out of your life, and you were left alone. Crying your heart out, gripping your chest as it physically hurts as well, the pain searing through you.

Two weeks later.

Your friend, Yeji, was making a ruckus, she was basically shoving her phone in your face.

"Y/N, look! Isn't this your ex?"

You peeked at the device, and your heart dropped along with your mood.

What the fuck?

That is your only reaction at the photo posted on Seonghwa's instagram because it hasn't been a month, and here he is, with a girl that he's being lovey-dovey with.

A girl.. a familiar one.

"That fucker." you uttered menacingly, your fists tightly clenched on your lap as your friends worriedly glanced at you.

Isn't that the one you asked him about? The fucking girl that was lingering around him all the damn time like a wretched fly. He told she's nothing but a co-worker.

Sure. Kissing your co-worker on the cheeksin a field of maple trees is very professional, isn't it?

You are not sure what to feel. He broke up with you so he could date that girl, it seems.

Should you be thankful? Or should you curse him until he dies?

Either way, now that you're thinking about it, maybe he really didn't fall out of love with you, just that he found someone that he loves more. There was no proof, but there was evidence of his upcoming betrayal.

The way he was always on his phone, and maybe, all the things he had done for you before were nothing but distractions so you wouldn't notice what he was doing behind your back.

A lady's gut never lies, yet you choose to ignore it, and this is what you get.

You laughed yet the tears dripping down your cheeks is the complete opposite of your actions.

Not once did you hear him apologize during the argument about the break-up, and my god, did you hate him so much for entering your life like a storm and leaving such a mess behind.

Park Seonghwa is no cheater, but he is a raging traitor.

Then again, no one is at fault here but you, as you should've seen this coming. You should've been alert, using your rationality instead of your useless heart, and now you're paying the price for his treason.

taglist:

@acciocriativity @iarayara @stolasisyourparent @shakalakaboomboo @xdannix @nsixns

[project-sekai-facts]

VBS event teaser commentary

Welcome back, it has been *checks calendar* 8 months since I was last able to do one of these jeez. Anyway, this will be a bit different to the ones I've done in the past, since rather than trying to predict what the event will be about, we already know. This is more of me trying to guess what will be in this event and what will be in VBS' next arc.

(TL by Project SEKAI ENG on twt)

(TLs from here onward by lozy bug on YT)

This event will have VBS finally surpassing RAD WEEKEND!!! This has been their primary goal since the start of the story, however more recently it has become more of a stepping stone for them in order to go beyond it. BREAK DOWN THE WALL has a lot of talk about how RW is a step for VBS before they go and do their own thing. It also is the obstacle blocking their SEKAI from expanding fully, in the form of a wall (hence the event title), which is also referenced in the event synopsis. The wall has started to crack with them honing their skills and resolve, but won't fully crumble until VBS can go beyond Nagi's dream.

Now all the way back to LUTF. Specifically the Nagi flashback section. So Nagi's dream was always for RADder to go on and reach a worldwide stage. They were popular in Japan and doing tours, and they had plans to do stuff overseas, but Nagi fell ill and died before any of this could become a reality. Nagi is like, the most important person in VBS' story. Ultimately she's the one who started it all. She decided to hold RW which inspired a whole generation of young people, passing the torch and hoping that they would go beyond what she achieved and do the things she always dreamed of. Without Nagi, there would be no VBS and no Street SEKAI.

So VBS' current goal is to go beyond what Nagi did, which entails VBS reaching around the world. However, the first step right now is to surpass RW. Now for what a lot of people have been asking me all day: is this rushed. Well, we won't really know until the event is out. But, imo, not really? It's been pretty obvious we're leading up to it, and while I thought we would have a few more events, this placement makes some sense (also WLEs are clearly leading up to a soon-ish big lore event so we need to get those sekai expanding lol).

I think some aspects could get rushed though or will happen offscreen. Again. Which was kinda an issue with On Your Feet, their last arc ender (though this was no fault of the writers i'm pretty sure they were not intending to wrap everything up at that point in time but plans were changed kinda last minute... you can tell bc events got insanely long for a bit and some units clearly needed more or less time than they were given). Mainly what comes to mind and what i've seen people talking about is Toya's song writing, and Arata's Whole Thing (& Souma!).

Toya's song writing is undoubtedly going to happen offscreen or in a card story. If it happens in the event itself, it probably will just be something that happens in passing and not given any focus, since this isn't his event. As for Arata (and Souma)? I think Arata will probably come back in this event, just because it feels very wrong to surpass RW without him. How they're going to bring him back? No idea, it was set up in BDTW and vaguely in Toya4 that he would come back in a future Toya event but this now feels like something that won't happen. However I still think the emotional baggage (aka his feelings about Souma and what Taiga said to him) will be dealt with in more detail in a future event, probably Toya5. Also then you can deal with Souma's stuff too, like the song he wrote for Arata that has been a thing since woao. Seriously, this is Toya event stuff, the only way they can get it in here is if they pull an Our Happy Ending and give Toya a dedicated chapter and try and squeeze it all in there. At the same time, I wouldn't be surprised if Arata stays MIA or is limited to a small appearance. It would be a bit disappointing, but there's a lot for the Squad past RW, so he can be there for event that surpasses the event that surpassed RW ig.

So what's next? I seriously suggest reading the epilogue of BDTW, it's only 6 minutes long and talks a lot about VBS' goals from here on out.

Their new SEKAI area takes inspiration from many places worldwide and their cultures and music, and the graffiti is all the names of famous street music events. They conclude that it's a place for teams that take the world. There's also an interesting scene earlier in the event that Miku reflects on here - Nagi's ghost (possibly her actual ghost, possibly a physical incarnation of An's imagination) was walking around the SEKAI, and she was looking at this one specific blank spot on one of the walls. Obviously, that spot was meant for RADder, but they never got to carve their name. VBS' new goal is to do exactly that. Maybe we'll see some travelling from that (where on earth they'd get the money i don't know), or maybe we'll deal with everyone's feelings and unresolved plot points first and Then get on the worldwide stage stuff (probably in the same arc. two if they decide to continue this past 6th anni).

[birdy-babe]

My final predictions: to then go back and look at after the Full Moon Episode and laugh at myself

I'm just going to compile everything I personally believe about the full moon, my predictions for things in it based on the trailer/past episodes, and just some miscellaneous other things.

Disclaimer: 1. these are all theories and this post is for fun 2. excuse all my screenshots bc I didn't feel like cropping them lol

Scenes in the trailer

Scenes I KNOW will be in The Full Moon

These three scenes are in the Stolitz Duet preview that we saw at the LVL UP panel - so they're confirmed :)

Scenes I'm CONFIDENT will be in there (but not confirmed)

They are using the book! and we are pretty sure Stolas is giving Blitzo the crystal in this episode. So this scene is pre-crystal :) Most likely the beginning of the Full Moon Episode.

Also Blitzo's suit jacket has blood on it! Which is important because that would prompt him to take it off (not wanting to see Stolas while covered in blood) and explain why in the rest of these scenes he's not wearing is jacket

So this scene would match up (Blitzo's outfit), which additionally goes along with all these scenes:

In all these scenes he is wearing the same outfit :) therefore part of the same episode <3

It's harder to say for Stolas, since it seems he's wearing the same outfit he wears a lot- but these are the scenes that I think are in the Full Moon based on 1. his outfit is the same 2. the scenes are simillar 3. the mood/theme of the scene would make sense

(this shot is the same as one posted earlier, where we see Blitz in his Full Moon outfit, therefore probs also apart of the Full Moon episode)

I believe this scene is in the Full Moon because it looks like it follows this gif that was posted on the Helluva Boss twitter:

ADDITIONALLY, at the beginning of the duet that was shown at the LVL UP panel, we hear Stolas "throw up" as he sings about "butterflies in his stomach". Therefore, we think that Gif is the beginning of the Stolitz duet, which is then followed by the scene in the trailer (pictured above), and then the rest of the Stolitz duet (shown at the LVL panel, you can find it on youtube).

Okay hear me out- it is MOST LIKELY in the full moon episode, for obvious reasons. (but.. what if its not... what if this is stolas sadly looking at the full moon in the apology tour or something... knowing he won't see blitz for the first time since they started seeing each other.... what if.....)

The only reason i'm pretty confident this is in the Full Moon episode is because... i want it to be? lmao. Like this could definitely be Blitzo sulking after things go wrong.

Scenes I think are definitely possible but i'm not confident

Notes: I was watching the trailer and realized theres most likely not a lot of scenes in it from Sinmas, since there's only a few from Mastermind (supposedly). They probably don't have a lot of animation done for the last two episodes. Therefore most scenes have to be ghostfuckers, apology tour, and the full moon.

I think it's pretty easy to see which scenes are confidently most likely from ghostfuckers and apology tour. So that leaves some scenes that might be from anything but are more likely from The Full Moon (since they probs don't have a lot of animation done for the last two).

ADDITIONALLY, they've been working on The Full Moon for what- 6? 7? Months? meaning it has to be a longer episode (at least 20 mins, most likely 30 mins). The crystal scene cannot be all of it.

Therefore I think these scenes have a good chance to be in The Full Moon, but i'm not confident and i don't really have any definite evidence for it.

(Stolas wearing the same fit therefore all the same scene) (could be a flash back?) (Could be after they breakup and Blitz is trying to make things better?) (Stella could have said something stupid which causes Stolas to get mad. Then she leaves, Blitz shows up, and they hang out???) (Maybe they don't break up, and agree to try to work things out/restart, and this is the beginning of that?) (So many options)

(could be apart of a song?) (I saw someone say we were maybe getting two songs this episode?)

(okay hear me out-) (Yes I agree this is most likely in an episode further down, like sinmas, after they develop their relationship further) (but what if-) (the idea here is that stolitz kinda breaks up/fights at the beginning of the episode, and then, and then this happens) (like i'm not certain what the context could be, like why Blitzo is there and why Andrealphus is attacking) ( but what if after their fight Blitzo saves Stolas's life, he shows up, shows he cares in this way-) (thus setting up the plot for apology tour) (where they decide hey- maybe we can work this out)

(Im including this because I DONT THINK it will be in The Full Moon, but I guess? it's possible) (because anything is possible) (but I think this is a court scene) (which is most likely going to be about the divorce?) (which btw, we think this is a court scene because of the trailer scene with mammon, he's obviously in the same room as these two, and he's wearing a suit? also Viv posted a video of Bryce Pinkham, who voices Stolas, saying a line that indicated he was in court, talking about Blitzo). (anyway) (I think this is A LOT of important plot) (and I think that would be too heavy to include in the Full Moon Episode) (I think it's more likely to be the B plot of another episode like Ghostfuckers or Mastermind)

Plot Predictions (theories?)

Okay so based on all the scenes we have, this is my official conclusion / prediction for how the episode will go (half based on my own wants and half based on evidence)

Starts with the Stolitz Duet.

Blitz goes to work with I.M.P and gets covered in blood. takes off his coat

Gives Moxxie the rest of the work for the day because he has "important business to attend too"

He goes to FIZZAROLLI'S HOUSE hehe

his important business was essentially asking FIZZAROLLI HOW TO SPICE UP THEIR DATE

bonus points if he asks for dating advice / confesses it might be more than it seems

Fizz shows him around, shows him some stuff (thus the scene where he's holding the uh....toy)

Thats where Blitz gets that big ass candle

Because he leaves here

and heads to Stolas' Palace

he shows up, either suspecting nothing and thinking it will go perfectly normal, or just pretending that everything's normal

he's excitedly showing Stolas the stuff he brought (like the candle and maybe other things that he got from Fizz)

Stolas interrupts him, suggests they should talk or something idk but theres some segue into him giving Blitz the crystal

They fight !! Thats when Blitz takes it badly, theres miscommunication, Blitz yells about how "You think you can just toy with our feelings because we are smaller"

At some point Blitzo reaches for Stolas' hand, maybe after saying something that crosses the line, and Stolas sends him through a portal (bc in that one scene, if you watch slow enough, you see blitz reaching for stolas' hand but ends up through a portal instead)

Cue: Sulking.

After this, is all really just headcanon? very loosely put together scenes that are pretty based on nothing, just assumptions. So take it as you will:

17. Maybe even cue: talking to m&m, talking to Loona, talking to someone and realizing he wants to try to fix this, or at least talk to Stolas again

18. Potentially returns to the palace, where Stolas is in the garden (and personally I think he fights with stella in that scene where he says "do you have any remorse for what you do" but I guess this could be to Blitzo aswell). Blitzo is half trying to act like things are normal, trying to kinda win him back, or talk to him or SOMETHING

19. Stolas catches an attitude bc wtf blitz pls be normal and communicate wtf

20. Idk what really happens here uhhhh

Or OR OR

22. He returns

23. and Andrealphus is attacking the palace

24. boom thats where he defends stolas

25. hahah please I just need NEED to know the context of that scene

26. so I hope its in The Full moon and I think thats what it would be.

27. They have a moment of mutual understanding, almost an unspoken "yes I love you too, idiot" and thus decide to work on things

28. setting the plot up for Apology Tour

lets out a breath anyway, that really concludes everything I think about The Full Moon and all the evidence/hints/peaks we've gotten for the episode.

Here is some links to some things I mentioned

the trailer incase you haven't seen it

LVL UP duet "when I see him"

Bryce Pinkman Voicing sneak peak

Helluva boss twitter

[shopwitchvamp]

Hello! You can ignore this if the subject is too personal, but I saw you mention that you got a hysterectomy. I've been wanting to get one for awhile for a variety of reasons (no desire to have children, wanting to permanently stop periods, ect) and I was wondering if there was anything I should know about it that isn't talked about a lot?

Yeah I had one at 25 after yearssss of medical horrors. It's a lot and probably a good deal of people don't wanna read my nightmares so-

I had absolutely life ruining periods from endometriosis/PCOS, and I also never wanted children, but couldn't stay on BC to control any of those things because I found out at 21 that it was making my cholesterol sky high. I then spent a few years being truly, literally insane because I was going off and on birth control of various types every few months to try to find anything that wouldn't give me high cholesterol. Drs were like oh maybe the patches will bypass whatever weird mechanism is making this happen, maybe nuvaring, maybe progesterone only, maybe the hormonal IUD, etc etc.

I'd rather not get into what exactly led to finally getting the hysterectomy (extremely traumatic..) but I don't mind talking about the hysterectomy itself.

All I really have to say is that I have ZERO regrets and that my life has improved DRAMATICALLY since getting the hysterectomy. I had a partial so I still have ovaries, which means still having issues from PCOS, still having a hormonal cycle, still dealing with PMDD at times, etc. But given all of the issues I'd had with hormonal BC I didn't want to have my ovaries removed and need to rely on taking hormones forever when they might have caused me more problems. This is an issue very very specific to me tho.

But yeah, before the hysterectomy I used to spend 7-10 days each month-ish incapacitated by nightmare periods, and then very often end up sick (like with a cold or sinus infection or strep throat) afterwards because my body was so weakened. The only thing that had helped before was being on the kind of BC pills you take for like 3 months straight with no breaks so that you skip periods. But once I found out about the cholesterol problem, well. They just cycled me on and off a bunch of different options while doing frequent blood tests, and then in the end were like "idk guess you just have to live with it forever." Until the obgyn I'd been seeing since I was 17, who had witnessed 8 years of my suffering and already done 2 surgeries on me, was finally willing to just do a hysterectomy back in 2016.

I hear that maybe it's a bit easier these days to find a doctor willing to perform a hysterectomy, but I can't say I know much about the process. If you're on the hunt I think maybe like the childfree subreddit has a list of doctors?

If you have any kind of more specific question I guess lemme know. I'm not sure what people do or don't talk about when it comes to this stuff, but I really don't have any negatives to report, which I mainly credit to not getting a total hysterectomy (so no early menopause issues, etc). (EDIT: just fyi anyone reading this, I've muted notifcations because while I don't mind talking about this it isn't exactly something I want popping up into my awareness every few minutes 😅 if you leave any comments or reblog tags it's totally fine, just know that I won't see them. thanks for understanding!)

[curious-l1ght-archived]

Took a break bc I had a short lived panic attack and calmed myself down so it wouldn't worsen but I'm back with a message for Ivorii

THIS IS REALLY LONG

Leave me the fuck alone. I don't understand why targeting me and thinking you can just apologise is something you can do. I'm literally scared of you after you targeted me. Just so you know, I BARELY GET SCARED OF PEOPLE!!!

And the fact that you are the reason that I'm hurting myself is a fact that I REALLY need you to know. You KNOW I was suicidal at one point, YOU KNOW YOU MOTHERFUCKER.

Getting that message was why I had a panic attack. AND I WILL FUCKING LEAK IT. HERE YOU GO

Tldr is at the bottom

Ivorii:

Okay, look. I fucked up, I know I did. I lied, and I was, so wrong for it. But, about my heart problems, they are hereditary, but my heart problems are not like yours, I didn't have to get cut open. It wasn't an open heart surgery like yours, it was originally going to be put in from my wrist/groin area, but it was changed to my esophagus area due to it being more "uphill". I know I caused you hell and that I probably scared the living shit out of you.

It wasn't right of me, at all. I feel bad about it everyday. I shouldn't have lied either, and I don't wish harm against anyone. I never did and I never will. I was a bad influence and a bad person, but I'm working to change. I know messing with any of you guys was the worst thing I could've done, and I feel so bad about it! If I had a second chance to go back and undo it, I would. I promise that I'm not a bad person, or a liar. I just didn't to get the attention I wanted, and I very immature when did it. I have remorse for everyone I hurt, and this isn't the first time I hurt someone(s) like this. But I have bigger apology to give out to you guys [Kris, Izzy, Candied] because you guys are minors, and you look up to those older than you, and I was the complete opposite. I probably know you won't see this and that you'll never trust me again, and it's understandable. I wouldn't trust myself either, but I'm working on being better, and trying to change. It's lonely without you guys, and I hate it. I hate every moment of it, and I hate that I did what I did. I hate not being there when you guys joke, or to celebrate holidays. I really want a second chance, only if you'll allow it. I'm so sorry for making you hurt, I'm really am a better person than this, I swear! I can try again, only if you'll let me. I acknowledge my wrong-doing, like an adult. I'm turning 20 this year and I'm acting like it. Just please don't tell Warden or the others that I'm here! I'm still very scared of them, and when I'm ready, I'll talk to them, but I just needed you to know.

I'm not a person, and I'll never make a foolish mistake like this again. Also, to clarify about my heart problems, but also apologize while I'm at it. I hurt you, and I never want you to feel a pain like that again. Just know I regret everything. I swear. You don't have to respond, I just needed to get that off of my shoulders, and hopefully off of yours too.

My response:

You targeted a minor, someone who just got tumblr a few months ago, and pretended to be someone else. I wanted to stay as far away from this stituation as far I possibly could but you pulled me into it. I'm actually fucking terrified of you now. You broke everyone's trust and ruined your reputation. You have caused me to hurt myself because I wanted a distraction from this and wanted to deal with a different type of pain. Targeting minors because you'd think they are more naive or whatever the fuck went through your rotting brain is downright wrong and its manipulation. Leave tumblr and never come back. Fuck you.

--------------

Taking it apart to respond better:

Okay, look. I fucked up, I know I did. I lied, and I was, so wrong for it.

You're damn right. You fucked up big time, and everybody knows that.

I know I caused you hell and that I probably scared the living shit out of you.

Yes, you really did. You scared me so bad I'm properly scared of you as a person.

It wasn't right of me, at all. I feel bad about it everyday. I shouldn't have lied either, and I don't wish harm against anyone.

Then why did you do this? Oh, right, ATTENTION.

I know messing with any of you guys was the worst thing I could've done, and I feel so bad about it!

Think before you act, fucker.

I promise that I'm not a bad person, or a liar. I just didn't to get the attention I wanted, and I very immature when did it.

Hard to believe you're turning 20.

But I have bigger apology to give out to you guys [Kris, Izzy, Candied] because you guys are minors, and you look up to those older than you, and I was the complete opposite.

You targeted minors. Think about that and get it through your thick ass skull.

I probably know you won't see this and that you'll never trust me again, and it's understandable. I wouldn't trust myself either, but I'm working on being better, and trying to change. It's lonely without you guys, and I hate it.

Yeah, I don't trust you at all anymore. Nobody does. And you're gonna have to deal with being lonely because of that.

I really want a second chance, only if you'll allow it. I'm so sorry for making you hurt, I'm really am a better person than this, I swear! I can try again, only if you'll let me. I acknowledge my wrong-doing, like an adult. I'm turning 20 this year and I'm acting like it.

Who is gonna give you a second chance? Are you really a better person? You act like a fucking 6 year old with your shitty lies and the fact that you constantly return and try to reconnect when we clearly don't want you around.

Just please don't tell Warden or the others that I'm here! I'm still very scared of them, and when I'm ready, I'll talk to them, but I just needed you to know.

WHAT THE FUCK?! DONT TELL THE PEOPLE WHO I ACTUALLY TRUST AND ARE ABLE TO HANDLE THIS BETTER THAN ME??? YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF THEM BECAUSE EVERY TIME YOU RETURN THEY KNOW OR I WILL TELL THEM BECAUSE NOBODY, AND I REPEAT, NOBODY, WANTS YOU HERE YOU SICK FUCK!

I'm not a person, and I'll never make a foolish mistake like this again. Also, to clarify about my heart problems, but also apologize while I'm at it. I hurt you, and I never want you to feel a pain like that again. Just know I regret everything. I swear. You don't have to respond, I just needed to get that off of my shoulders, and hopefully off of yours too.

"I'm not a person" this typo is fucking hilarious. You didn't clarify anything about your heart problems in this last paragraph. You hurt everyone. This made the weight on my shoulders worse.

Sorry, the tldr was still really long ;-;

[goldenflowers]

HII ITS IDIAVIL ANON AGAIN!!! i wanted to respond to the post u made in response to my ask... I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND NOT BEING ABLE 2 WRITE FICS LIKE!! ive been creatively writing for years and when it comes to stuff im rlly passionate abt i can become super duper creative. my struggle with writing fanfic is finding the time and motivation, plus my adhd makes it difficult for me to focus, BUT IVE BEEN DOING BETTER RECENTLY!!! im kinda familiar with wicked? i saw it on stage back when i was just a wee lad but i dont remember much of it (i honestly think i fell asleep ;-;) but i've been wanting to watch both the play and the new movie, i just haven't gotten to it yet. i will definitely keep this in mind as i watch both!! a few weeks ago i actually watched jennifer's body for the first time, i'd been wanting to watch it but then i saw someone mention a jennifer's body idiavil au and oh my gods i literally couldnt stop thinking about it. i've definitely kept that au in mind, and i will do the same for the wicked au!! when i do eventually watch wicked i'll probably send another giant yapping paragraph in ur asks abt it... ALSO PLEEASEE I WOULD LOVE LOVE LOVE TO HEAR MORE ABT UR AU IT SEEMS SO COOL!!! also. hercules au. oh my god u get me. i'm not exaggerating when i say i've thought abt the idiavil meg and hercules parallel at least once a day for the past like five or so months. i NEVER stop talking to my friends about it EVER. i was actually on a disney cruise (twas a family trip) about a month ago and they had a giant tv above the pool, they showed a movie every fifteen minutes (after the movie prior had ended) and WHEN I TELL YOU I FREAKED OUT WHEN I SAW THEY HAD A SHOWING FOR HERCULES. AND I HAD TO RESIST FROM STIMMING (i get embarrassed when i stim in public bc i dont like being looked at or percieved like ever) DURING WONT SAY IM IN LOVE LIKE THATS PROBABLY MY FAVORITE DISNEY SONG OF ALL TIME OH MY GOODNESS. I WOULDNT STOP TEXTING MY FRIEND AND TALKING ABOUT IDIAVIL. also i did see ur response and oh my goodness i think abt it so much. ill probably share the keychains and playlists off anon later... also i LOVE the fact u keep ur pins of them next to each other... my birthday was actually a while ago (oct 28th) but the art has been delayed bc shes been busy which idm, shes putting a ton of effort into it. ill also probably share that off anon whenever its done!! alr im gonna wrap this up, i do have a few things i have to get done soon but i'll try to send in those playlists and pictures of the keychains b4 i go to bed tn!!

hi again haha!! whenever you watch the wicked movie i really hope you enjoy it! just keep in mind that they kind of, extended every single scene in act 1 to make it 2.5 hours long (when the whole stage musical with both acts combined is that length), so it's only a part 1 and we won't get part 2 until next year. which admittedly DOES bug me but i still loved the movie anyway. if you want to watch the stage musical after that, well, the people who record bootlegs usually ask you not to put them on youtube but people do anyway AKJDGJFSG. so you can probably find one easily enough! it's my absolute favorite musical! when i went to see it live in april, i kept thinking "well, vil does share glinda's love of fashion and her popularity and ambition, but he's different from her in a lot of ways too! for example, he doesn't believe that popularity is the only thing that really matters, and he would never sacrifice his own morals and ideals to achieve his goals... oh... wait..." and then i realized that the whole plot of book 5 is that vil kind of DID do all that! that's the whole tragedy of it, that he overblotted because he DID start to think that his hard work was meaningless and that he SHOULD resort to any means possible to be the most popular at the expense of his moral compass, and he thought of himself as ugly for doing so! he COULD have ended up basically alone, being praised by others around him as beautiful and good while inside he secretly believes himself to be wicked, just like glinda if his friends hadn't done everything to stop him from poisoning neige.

and idia may not be an animal rights activist like elphaba, nor is she an otaku LOL, but elphaba grew up lonely and ostracized because of her green skin and idia's family curse forced him to grow up isolated on the isle of woe and have blue fire for hair. she's a caretaker for her disabled sister whose father blames her for her condition, and idia has a robot brother whose death he blames himself for. elphaba is jaded and sarcastic and abrasive and deeply insecure, and who else fits that description? the only issue is that idia is far too pessimistic about the future to decide to do what elphaba does in defying gravity on his own, but i think in an AU he could be pushed to do it. also there's this part in wicked where after glinda and elphaba get back from a big dance at the ozdust ballroom glinda says "was that your first party?!" and elphaba deadpans "does a funeral count?" and i can just so clearly see that with idia and vil AFKJDGHF. there's so many other scenes too that i just see as being perfect for them.

as for fiyero i had two ideas here: in the actual musical, there's a love triangle in which elphaba and fiyero ultimately end up together but as i mentioned i would want to give my AU a happy ending and make vil and idia end up together in it. so i would do one of two things: 1) cast kalim as fiyero, because he literally just fits the role perfectly. fiyero is a foreign prince, and look at the lyrics to dancing through life and try to tell me kalim wouldn't sing this. but i don't ship kalim with either vil or idia, so in this scenario i'd probably cut the love triangle and have him somehow end up as their bestie who supports whatever insane gay thing those two have got going on. imo kalim really does fit fiyero better than anyone else and this idea is just so funny to me. or 2) cast rook as fiyero, keep the love triangle, and have it end in polyamory because even though i've never even considered shipping rook with idia i do ship rook/vil and i think this would be hilarious as an AU. also, there's a scene in wicked where glinda and elphaba are hanging out and glinda is like "let's tell each other our best secrets! i'll go first! FIYERO AND I ARE GOING TO BE MARRIED!!!" and since they've just started dating elphaba is like "he's asked you already??" and then glinda goes "oh no, he doesn't know yet!" and imagining vil saying that about rook just makes me laugh so hard.

OKAY. so there is an incomplete summary of my thoughts on a vilidia wicked AU!! honestly i don't really watch horror movies so i haven't seen jennifer's body but if i ever do watch it i'll have to keep that AU idea in mind. as for the hercules parallel idk if you've seen this post of mine but it makes me so happy every time someone likes or reblogs it because then i get to think about them again. hercules/meg has always been one of my favorite disney couples so when i saw this happen in book 6 i was immediately just. doomed to be insane about vil/idia forever because are you KIDDING ME?? also your birthday is right after mine omg, mine was october 25th!! so a late happy birthday to you, then! one last thing i'd like to say in this already way too long response is that i have two sets of floyd and riddle nuis--listen, they're my other favorite ship so i bought the first ones online and then saw more at a con i went to and couldn't resist--and i'm going to be getting idia and ortho nuis for christmas. hopefully soon i'll be able to get a vil nui as well so i can keep him right next to his boyfriend and his film club buddy/future brother-in-law 💙💜

[angst-in-space]

october '24 writing progress

words written: 11.5k

most words written in a day: 1,781

least words written in a day: 0

yearly total: 126.2k

projects worked on:

ya sci-fi book edits

planning adult sci-fi book

bsd regency au

sylvix week fic

published spy x vacation piece

planning alnst fics

works published in september:

mama bear (spy x family / gen)

october goals:

do some more edits on ya sci-fi book and send to friends!!

finish planning + draft most of sylvix week fic

finish ch 1 of bsd regency fic

post ch 4 of renga practice kissing fic (maybe chapter 5 too if i have time?)

work on other fic if i have time

november:

HAVE FUN IN JAPAN 🇯🇵

more ya sci-fi book edits, maybe send out to friends

finish draft of sylvix week fic

work on / plan other fics if i have time (i probably won't)

notes:

october was a bit all over the place for me. i was traveling for the first week-ish of the month and then the rest of the month... well, didn't get a lot done but that's partly because I'M GOING TO JAPAN IN THREE DAYS (!!!) so the last few weeks have been a lot of planning/preparing etc. plus stressed about...other things going on in the world, so i just did not have as much mental energy. but oh well that's ok!

i still did a bit more editing of my ya sci-fi book, mostly on One Chapter that has been a pain in my ass. but i think i am almost done with it now and hope to send it out to critique partners soon. i'm hoping i can also do a bit more general editing and be able to send the whole book out to some friends/fam to read for fun (maybe by end of the year at least)... feel like i need a positivity pass very badly lol.

also did a bit of planning on an adult sci-fi book idea i've been thinking about for like... a year-ish now. still am trying to figure out a lot of plot details, but i did at least sorta figure out the ending i think!

i got a fair amount of my sylvix week fic done (i think about 2.5k so far) but uhh not as much as i hoped. i'm nervous about getting it done on time bc i haven't even finished the first chapter (out of a planned 4 chapters) annddd i am gonna be in japan for half the month and have accepted i will not have time to write lol. plus there is thanksgiving and everything after that... 😅 but i will try my best o7

oh yeah i also fell very far down the alien stage rabbit hole (i sure do love that.. angst in space....hahaha) so that has basically consumed my entire brain for the past week. literally like a day after i finished watching all of it / consuming all the bonus content i started planning two fics immediately, one of which i've written like 3k words of notes for so errmmm. i'm not sure when i'll actually have time to write those, maybe if i can actually finish writing a thing or two by the end of the year lmao.

soooo yeah that's what was up with me this past month! november i'm just going to focus primarily on enjoying my trip, but i hope to get a bit done here and there too. happy november and manifesting that this month treats us all well 💖

[baiyunli]

Wait so! Jack confesses he loves Nico and Nico is like “hmm I’m not sure” and then after the season starts and Jack is officially retired Nico comes home one day and Jack is still there and Nico confronts him about it and Jack has to make sure Nico knows one more time he loves him. Is it possible to get Nico’s pov please?!

finally getting around to answering this ask, my bad anon!!

ref - there is like, a ton of drawn-out tension and exposition and whatever the fuck (i say this bc i'm reading back my notes and i don't even know what i was talking about) that happens between jack confessing and nico finally confronting him about it for good, particularly re: jack recognizing that it's time for him to bow out of hockey, as sort of a stepping stone in actually understanding why nico is mad at him and what he's done wrong.

i don't know how productive it would be to outright repeat the scene beat-for-beat in nico's POV but the bare bones, absolutely!

i think that leading up to this scene, there's probably a lot of things that just haven't gotten right for nico - it's been more than a week on the road and he's exhausted and hungry and he knows he'll have to get home and make small talk with jack, because that's what they always do. because it's been just small talk for however many months since jack first arrived and he won't stop shying away any time nico tries to dig a little deeper and figure out what's going on.

jack sitting on his couch is like looking at a memory from a past nico thought he had moved on from but that refuses to let him go, so really it's not his fault when he drops his bags too loud and asks if jack's going to leave anytime soon - maybe not in those exact words, but close enough.

and nico has to watch all of this as jack stumbles around the apartment in the eerie blue light of the tv, and he could turn on the kitchen light but he doesn't, because if he did it would just make this all more real. he wishes he hadn't hurt jack but it's easy to feel distant from it when jack won't even look at him and nico's leaning against the kitchen counter, all of jack's shit tossed everywhere that he hadn't even noticed before. nico doesn't think he's a bad person but he's tired and petty and vengeful and he just wants this all to go away, make it a little easier for him to exist in his own space, by himself.

then when jack finally says it; tells him how long he's loved nico for, how every time when he ducked out of the visitor's locker room so nico couldn't catch him or avoided answering questions about facing his old team or ignored nico's texts, he was just trying not to spend the rest of his lifetime loving nico more than nico loved him back.

and nico just - maybe everything breaks wide open then and there, jack's face somewhere between heartbreak and resignment in the light of the tv. nico's hand on his arm. the tight, unhappy downturn of his mouth and the steely look in his eye, because no matter how many times he'd told nico he loved him in the past few months he had never really tried to convince nico (or himself) that he truly did understand and knew what it meant, to grow up and grow out and offer himself up to someone else like this.

maybe it's the lack of desperation that gets nico, this time. the fact that jack looks like he's never believed more in what he's saying, but he's also ready to take no for an answer. the fact that nothing and no one has ever made nico give in as easily as jack hughes does, every single day, and nico is tired of holding so much resentment in his heart. that he's forgiven so many people, so many times, and just once more can't hurt.

[wern]

the reason he accused me of animal abuse is literally THEE stupidest thing in the world im gonna put it under a read more

so my dad has this anti-bark device that he used on his dogs consistently for a year. i was actually originally opposed to him getting it bc ive heard it's inhumane, but i couldn't stop him, and the dogs treated it like a minor annoyance and it reduced their barking. whatever. i know the device well bc it was turned on when i dogsat for him and after a couple weeks i turned it off bc it would go off if you even put down grocery bags or opened a door. i could hear it go off those times (my dad can't hear it btw but can see the light go on) but the dog didn't react.

now hes moving out of country so the dog will be staying with me. im taking all the dog's stuff to my place, and today when i dropped by his place he gave me his anti-bark devices (he actually owns 4 now for some reason, i guess he kept losing them in his apartment. he does stuff like that all the time). i was holding onto one while sitting down and talking to my dad, and i idly turned the dial a couple times (from off to the low setting to the high setting). i heard it emit the noise, and after id done it a few times i said "oops, i probably shouldn't fiddle with this because it's making the noise. i'll just turn it off." then i did turn it off and it stopped making noises. btw the dog didn't react to the noise at all. he was across the apartment doing his own thing

but my dad says "you should put it down because it can make noise even if you just move it around." and i said "no, i turned it off so it won't do that." he said "it's going to make noise if you drop it." i was like "it won't make noise, look i'm shaking it around and knocking it. it's off. and im not going to drop it anyway" and he said "you don't know if you're going to drop it. thats what dropping is you do it by accident. i can't believe you won't just do this one thing i ask". we went on for a few more lines but this is the idea.

i get that i was being stubborn. but so was he. minor disagreement right? the thing is he is the type of guy who will try to say youre wrong about everything. here's a convo i had with him 2 hours before:

him: im meeting my friend in thailand

me: oh when?

him: what do you mean when?

me: when are you meeting him?

him: when? when? that doesn't even make sense what are you taking about?

me: i was just asking about the timeline of your plans

him: right but the sentence is in present tense. it doesn't make sense to ask when

LIKE... im just saying he's a dick about everything. after this barking device talk he started giving me the silent treatment. i tried a few overtures but he just muttered "yeah sure". my mom was there so she smoothed things over a bit and we left. i thought that was it. until i get a barrage of texts accusing me of not caring about him and the dog, and also accusing me of literal animal abuse because i kept using the device that "damages the dog's ears". im like. IT WAS OFF???? I WAS SHOWING YOU IT WAS OFF??? AND YOU USED THE DEVICE CONTINUOUSLY FOR MONTHS. anyway that's the story.

me: yes, you're using the present progressive to talk about a future action. is it happening before you go to the philippines?

him: whatever. before

[sumarmzthesadseal]

Vent ig idk man it's not as bad as the other ones don't read it tho i'l probably snap out of it and delete this in a few hours ughhh don't read this I'll die of embarassment if you do then I'll resurrect and kill myself

I know I've been going on about healing and healthy relationships and all that and it's great and I love my friends but my healing journey actually started by losing one of my friends. I won't go into much detail about it but it was no fault of their own and I just kind of realised that we'd become two different people and like we weren't rlly friends anymore and it freaked me out and this person was my whole LIFE like I obsessed over her more than I did my girlfriend (before we got together and he helped me thru all that ofc) so that rlly shook me up and I went through all this shit because I was like holy shit we're not friends anymore holy shit do I even know you do you even think of me as often as I think of you we haven't spoken in months you never try to see me if I'm back in town you don't care about me as much as I care you and I really crashed out over that but my friend William helped me through that and eventually I was like. Well. Gotta move on lock in for gcses. So I did. And rhats when I got better. When I accepted thst we weren't as close. But as I kept getting better I realised we wrre never close. I didnt know him at all. I was infatuated with this idolised persona I had created with her for no reason at all bc I was in such a crappy place and they just happened to have the misfortune of being my friend. Of being my will to live. And again, that's scary. The idea that clinging onto this person who I never really knew was the thing holding me back all along. I used tk think I'd kill myself without her. Yet I needed to forget them to be happy. And I hate that. The worst thing is, he doesn't know about any of this. She probably hasn't even noticed I've distanced myself. And they'll never know. Because they never knew me. We weren't friends. Ever. If I told her all this she'd probably tell me to shut up and I'm being paranoid but I've lost sleep over this, I'm not lying for once. It just fucking sucks because all my memories before I moved were of them, and I think back to those times and I just want the illusion of happiness back. I want him to compliment my art again. I want her to spam yee haw in the chat again. I want to be called random pet names in french. I want to text them every day again. I want them to consume my every waking thought forever. But I can't have that. It's not good for me. And it wasn't for her either. Fuck man. I'm happy, I really am. I've got an amazing support system and my love for people isn't possessive and violent anymore. But dammit I wish I could've done all this with them. He shouldve had this side of me. We shouldve been able to have a normal friendship. But I had to be a fucking idiot. I wish I could say sorry. I used to wish that she'd hate me you know. Just so I could force myself to detach from them. And I secretly hoped that meant they'd obsess over my like I do them. That was just another cheap way out of accountability though. We were just holding each other back. I wonder if they even think of me.

I know I sound all hung up over an ex or whatever but I think I needed to say all this. I feel like now I can actually let go and accept that they're just not a part of my life anymore. I miss you dude, more than you'll ever understand

[chaoticneutralgood2627]

Since my last post was fun doorknob adventures, I'm sharing a story too. This is long, and I am sorry, but I think its hilarious.

So. Front screen door. Handle starts getting a lil bit fucky. My entire household accepts that you just kinda have to mess with it to get it to open. (Kick it, twist it specifically up instead of down, try it a few times, y'know, that sort of stuffs.)

Several months of this.

I get home from work one day. Freezing fucking cold bc of course it is. At like 10pm at night. And the door won't open. I stare in confused bc I'm wondering if someone managed to lock me out of the fucking house and if they did, I might cry.

Message for backup. Not enough people in this house are attached to their phones.

Eventually just decide to go in the garage. Promptly start asking what the hell is up with the door.

Minor chaos for a few days while none of us know what to do. We keep using the garage door.

My housemate finally gets the door open (from outside, with a screwdriver, I have respect and fear), puts tape over the latch, and we breathe a collective sigh of relief. At least we can get through the door.

Go with it for a few weeks until people get new door handle.

.

Important to mention: there are 7 fucking people in this house. We have 1 adulty-adult (pays for things, my housemates' mom, can't communicate for SHIT), 5 adults (we can survive on our own if necessary, varying skills, most disabled in some way physical or mental), 1 disabled human who cannot do a lot of things for himself (the only one excused from the following shenanigans).

Of these 7 humans, there is a guy older than me who literally makes his own fishtanks, put up shelves in the garage, generally the person I ask if I'm not sure how to use tools for something. There's me, who likes to put things together, but usually my own things because if something goes wrong, I'm only fucking up my own stuff. There's my roommate who likes putting furniture and puzzle-adjacent things together. There's our other housemate who is the one who figured out the tape who is feral and I love their style. There's also their partner who is currently recovering from top surgery and can't do physical stuff but CAN COMMUNICATE VERY WELL between their mom and other people which is a REALLY VALUABLE SKILL.

.

Back to the story. We have the door handle replacement. I casually assume that the person who puts together fishtanks for fun and that my roommate and I went to for assistance on putting up shelving was going to put it on. It seemed like it was more in his direction of putting things together.

The door handle never gets put on.

That's fine, door is still taped, we can still get in and out. No problem. I assume he's just having A Time and can't do it yet.

.

Get to literally the week before Christmas. Bitterly cold outside. It's probably in the 20's°F. And the adulty-adult of the house finally mentions TO OUR OTHER HOUSEMATES that she figured I was going to put the handle on because I 'seemed excited when it was bought'.

Friendly reminder, dear readers, that I had been locked outside in the freezing fucking cold when this thing broke. I was excited because we would be able to get in and out of the godsdamned house.

The communication housemate rolled high enough insight to ask if she had actually TOLD ME that I had been assigned this job. The answer was no.

Once I was actually informed that this was supposed to be my job, it was replaced that night (not without shenanigans, but it was done).