#its been a while since i really interacted with pride and prejudice

[emry-stars-art]

Ok ok but royal au Andrew def does the Darcy hand flex™️ after any hand interaction with Abram

YOU UNDERSTAND MY VISION

[theangryhistoriananna]

One of the arguments I see a lot of floating around for why Elain and Lucien aren't endgame material is that they don't have any chemistry.

and as someone whose been reading romance fiction in all it's subgenres for nearly two decades now, that's just a really weird thing to say.

authors (worth their grain of salt anyway) can create chemistry between any of their characters at any time. They can also interestingly enough, destroy chemistry between any of their characters at any time. SJM has already done this in her ACOTAR series with Tamlin and Feyre. It's really not unheard of in serial romance series that take on multiple characters points of view throughout the series to keep chemistry between two future narrating characters subdued and minimal. I recall Colin and Penelope being like this in the original Bridgerton books (not the tv show which was clearly building them up from the beginning). Penelope and Colin's book btw was the fourth book in the series.

Having chemistry is not always a sign of a couple being endgame. Oftentimes actually it's the opposite. Charged physical chemistry can often be used to tell the reader that the characters are only physically attracted to one another.

Going along with that, the trope of the woman/female being in love with/or infatuated with/or intimate with another man/male for a good portion of the story has a long history in romance novels. Jane Austen LOVED that trope. Let's look at Pride and Prejudice (cause I just recently reread that masterpiece). Most of us generally refer to the 2005 movie Pride and Prejudice when we think of the story, which, like the Bridgerton show, had Elizabeth and Darcy's chemistry jump out at us for the moment they look at one another, and we tend to think it must have been like that in the books too (I know I'm often guilty of that) but rereading it, you'll actually find that their first interaction is very bland, and the first part of their story, Darcy is more of a secondary character to Elizabeth's story-which focuses more on her interest in Jane and Bingsley's romance and then in her own with Mister Wickham. While you can't deny there is some chemistry early on, it's very subdued, and easily overtaken by the obvious chemistry that jumps out between Elizabeth and Wickham. It's not till Elizabeth spurns Darcy's first proposal (which sadly isn't anywhere as sexy as the scene in the movie) that we have any real build up between them at all. They have to have that first breakdown in their own preconceived ideas of each other, and truly see each other, before they can start building real chemistry (and as a side note I want to note that a lot of that chemistry build up was done while separated from one another and avoiding each other) Sense and Sensibility actually has a more direct link with Lucien and Elain, since it has the MMC Colonel Brandon being in love with and longing after Marianne long before she ever even notices him or gives him the time of day. And yet even as she spurns him in favor of John Wiloughby, I would argue she and Brandon are building chemistry on page by the mere fact that he is there, respectful of her, but still there and caring even from a distance. Caring so much that Marianne's sister hurts for him (hmmm kind of like Cassian and Feyre do for Lucien....huh). It takes Wiloughby spurning Marianne cruelly for her to realize what she thought she wanted wasn't actually what she wanted, and to open her eyes to see Brandon right there before her. Historical romance is so rife with these tropes it's become almost parse and parcel of the genre but its pretty common in fantasy too especially in stories that also are exploring the main FMC discovering herself and what she wants out of life in general.

Chemistry is pretty subjective. Like yes the author can clearly write to try and suggest chemistry between two characters, but whether the reader picks up on it is up to their own tastes and preferences. I love me a good "reluctant love" "slow burn" and "mutual pining" story and when I tell you that the chemistry JUMPS off the page between Lucien and Elain in a way none of the other characters have so far. Their entire first scene together in the library? How his heart was racing so fast he was going to throw up and had to focus on the rug to distract himself? The guilt and the longing warring in him when he first sees her face? How he shudders when she says his name for the first time? How she comes out of her catatonic state and looks at him and seems curious and interested in him? Perfection. The vibes? Immaculate. How she turns this suave, rakish flirt into a blubbering mess who can barely hold a conversation? Yes please, give me more of that. When he bows to her to hide his longing and sadness? The half step she takes towards him? How she was clearly going to speak to him? YES. The way she randomly insists Greyson knows Lucien's name? Even without getting in her head I think it's obvious that there is something about Lucien that intrigues and overwhelms Elain and she's not ready to face it, so she's distracting herself and ignoring it and hoping it'll go away. Which is in and of itself a way to build chemistry between two characters.

As many people have been screaming for years, we haven't been in Elain's head yet (and only in Lucien's very briefly) but I think it's very obvious, even if the other characters aren't picking up on it, that there is something there. Simmering right below the surface between Lucien and Elain, and the first part of their story will probably be the explosion, the first breaking down of their preconceived ideas of each other, and then we can start Elain's real love story.....

[brewsterispunkk]

marriage of convenience part 4

pairing: pero tovar x fem!reader

WC: 1.6k (guys this is so short im sorry)

warnings: pero being an ass, mentions of familial abuse

a/n: life has been CRAZY lately so heres a filler chapter before it really heats up. i’m determined to finish by the end of the summer!!! p.s. see if you can find the pride and prejudice reference hehe

- - -

He found you again as you washed the dishes after dinner. You hadn’t even noticed him there until two hands on your shoulders made you start. 

You gasped turning from the wash basin in front of you, eyes stormy. You were annoyed at being pulled away from your work—you were sore, tired, and emotionally exhausted from the day. You were grappling with the reality of the loss of one of your only freedoms, coupled with the fact that you’d now have a near constant escort. The last thing you wanted to do was have a conversation with him.

“What?” You glared up at Tovar, who merely looked down at you with the same surly expression. “Have you found some problem with my washing the dishes?”

He frowned down at you, before meeting your eyes. You looked at him expectantly. 

Wordlessly, he grabbed your wrist in a much lighter grip than earlier when you’d cut his hair. 

You froze as his fingers gripped your arm in a featherlight grip. 

You had rolled up your otherwise long sleeves, leaving the purple and green of your wrists for him to see. 

“Who?” He asked gruffly, voice low and so quiet you could barely hear it. 

You furrowed your eyebrows, incredulous. 

“What do you care?” You snatched your wrist to your chest. 

He furrowed his eyebrows angrily, opening his mouth to respond, before the banging open of the front door caused you to jump.

There, stumbling through the door, was Petyr, drunk already, even before the sun had set. 

You froze, eyes widening as he kicked off his boots. Instinctively, you backed away from Tovar, your back hitting the basin of water you used to wash the dishes. 

“Mm-hello there,” Petyr mumbled, eyes raking over you before moving to Tovar. He smirked before turning to the hearth where your mother was sat mending. “Hello mother.” 

“Hello dear,” you heard your mother’s muffled voice reply. 

You let yourself deflate, finally, the fear and adrenaline calming. 

You let out a shaky breath, looking up to meet Tovar’s dark eyes, narrowed at you. You found understanding.

“Him?” He asked, sounding almost angry. 

Your defeated eyes lifted to his and he nodded, before taking a step back. 

“You will not walk with him. I will escort you.” 

He barely let you get in a word edgewise before he stalked off, leaving you to wonder what the hell had just happened.

- - 

Two days later, the two of you set off to town bright and early. 

You’d discovered from William that while he would stay and help your father with his carpentry, Tovar had found work at the blacksmith’s in the square. Apparently, he had experience from before he was a sellsword. 

Not that you would know, though. He had barely spoken a word to you since your encounter after dinner. 

Now, you walked down the wooded road side by side, in complete silence save for the chirping of the birds and the occasional rustle of a rabbit in the lush bushes. 

You gripped your basket filled with your mother’s herbs tightly, clearing your throat.

“So,” you began, tired of the stifling silence. “You’re from…Aragon?”

You’d heard tell of the rich kingdoms to the South. You’d interacted with enough travelers to know a little about them, but you’d always longed to see them yourself–hearing about their rich culture and architecture. 

Tovar only grumbled, before begrudgingly answering. 

“Castille.”

“Oh,” you said dumbly. You’d heard of Castille and its rolling hills and dry summers, but you’d never met someone from there. 

Some more time passed before you spoke up again. 

“What’s it like there?”

“Hot.”

You scoffed. 

“Okay, fine.”

“What?”

“Nothing,” you picked up your pace, walking ahead of him. 

You scoffed to yourself. You should have known better. Of course he wouldn’t want to make actual pleasant conversation with you. He was a rake and a grump besides. 

“Slow down,” he called, obviously trying to catch up with you. 

“Keep up,” you flung over your shoulder. 

“Why are you so stubborn?” He raised his voice, causing you to stop in your tracks. You whipped around, finding him standing still with his hands on his hips in the middle of the road. 

“Why are you so unpleasant?” You began a slow walk toward him. “I am merely trying to make conversation and you rebuff me at every chance.”

He rolled his eyes at you and you snorted. 

“You are acting like a child.”

“You are the one who pouts like a toddler every second of the day.”

He narrowed his eyes at you. 

“I was not asked to make conversation with a spoiled brat. I was asked to accompany you to and from the village. That is what I am doing. And you are getting in the way of my job.”

You scoffed and turned on your foot, beginning to walk away from him.

You’d had enough; you didn’t need to wait for him. You didn’t even need an escort. He could catch up if he wanted to, or he couldn’t. The choice was up to him. 

You heard his annoyed huff as he struggled to keep up with you.

- - - You ran into Lisbeth, blessedly, at the market after Pero stalked away from you toward the blacksmith’s shop. You glared at him as he left. 

God, you hated him. 

“What’s that look for?” Lisbeth asked as she took your arm, her long auburn hair plaited away from her face. You tore your eyes away from the sellsword who had soured your mood.

“Nothing,” you grumbled. “It’s only him.”

“Hm,” Lisbeth hummed conspiratorially. “He isn’t nearly as roguish or scary as you described. He’s rather...”

“If you say handsome, Lisbeth, I will lose my breakfast.”

She laughed. 

“Well,” she leaned into you. “He is. He’s handsome, if you can get past the scar.”

You didn’t even mind the scar, truth be told. And she was right: he was handsome. But his attitude took away from whatever attraction you may have had for him. 

You sighed.

 “Yes, I suppose he would be somewhat comely if it weren’t for his horrid temperament.”

“He’s as surly as he looks, I take it?”

“More.”

Lisbeth tutted. 

“That is too bad,” she sighed. “My father wants me married by autumn. I was hoping we could be wed together.”

You threw your head back and laughed at that.

 “He is the last man I could be prevailed upon to marry,” you laughed. “Besides, your father has said that every year since we were fifteen.”

“He is serious this time.” She was wistful as she said it.

 “And you do not wish to?”

“It isn’t that,” she stops to inspect some vegetables at  an old woman’s stall. “All I’ve ever wanted is to be a mother. It’s only… I worry who he will match me with.”

You sigh and squeeze her arm. 

“Your father is kind. And wise. You are his only daughter. He will choose well. You will be happy.”

“I hope you’re right,” she smiled, before handing the old woman some coins for her pick of carrots and lettuce. “What of your father? How does he fare?”

You felt your stomach drop.

“Not well,” you sighed. “He is bedridden again.”

The strange illness that plagued your father had reared its ugly head again. He’d been steadily declining for years, but it had taken a turn for the worse in the past week. You could tell your mother was getting worried this time, preparing. It scared you. The thought of a world without your father was unbearable, not just because of what he meant to you, but because that meant that Petyr would be the man of the house. 

You shivered at the thought. 

You ignored Lisbeth’s pitying look and shook your head.

 “Come,” you said. “I must fetch herbs for his medicine.” - -

You didn’t talk on the walk back. He didn’t try, and you were  glad for it; you would’ve refused to reply if he did. 

You were still angry from this morning; about the way he huffed and grunted and refused to even dignify you with a response. 

Pompous ass, you thought as you started down the trail. 

You could hear him lumbering around gracelessly behind you. 

You hadn’t spoken a word since he’d left you in the square this morning to work at the Blacksmith’s. When he returned, he was sweaty and coal-lined, his hands rough and dirty. You ignored the pointed look Lisbeth gave you when she’d caught you staring. 

You were weighed down with your wares—you had a basket of parsnips that you’d traded with a fisherman’s wide in exchange for a tonic that eased headaches, some thyme you’d traded with a traveler for, a fresh loaf of bread your mother bade you buy, and a small flagon of cider from last harvest fastened over your shoulder with a leather strap. Your mother had also bade you retrieve that, though you weren’t sure what for. You hoped that Petyr wouldn’t get his hands on it. 

You huffed, your shoulder aching with the weight of the flagon bearing down on it. You weren’t used to carrying such weight for long distances, and the summer heat was stifling. 

You dreaded the two mile walk home. 

Pero scoffed at you, coming to stride beside you from where he had been sulking behind. Wordlessly, he grabbed the leather strap and slid the flagon from your shoulder, before heaving it onto his with a grunt. 

You ignored the flash of heat that sound sent through you. 

“That is entirely unnecessary—”

“Are you always this stubborn?” He glared down at you. 

His dark eyes, one lidded with that scar, met yours and you swore you felt the heat of the late summer afternoon increase by tenfold. Your cheeks heated.

You were the one to break the stare, scoffing. 

“Fine,” you said, walking ahead. “But don’t complain to me when your shoulder hurts.”

[sapphirelycoris]

𝑨 𝑩𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝑩𝒆𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝑨𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒈𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 & 𝑨𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕: 𝑰

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Suggestive lines, pining (like a lot because Enji's a simp), enemies to lovers style writing, weird 19th century type dialogue but I think it's still readable. Please tell me if I missed any.

Ship: Enji Todoroki x female reader (she/her)

Word count:  2,707

Music: Pride & Prejudice Music & Ambiance

Author's note: I know some of the character's relationships with others are kind of weird but I casted them according to personality. For example, Ryuko reminds me of Charlotte Lucas and Nejire reminds me of her little sister, Maria. I just kind of threw names around haha... A NSFW and continuation soon to come. God, it's been a while since I posted anything on this blog.

Written/created for: @pleasantanathema's Through Ink and Quill | A Classics Collab

Summary: A Pride and Prejudice inspired piece, featuring Enji Todoroki as the male love interest. Loosely following the plot of the actual novel with a few twists on the actual story's dialogue, characters, & events. When you meet Mr. Enji Todoroki, he was the last man in the world you'd ever want to be around. However, as your paths cross more and more, you see that your first impression of him was inaccurate.

"The world works in mysterious ways. He doesn’t know what happened and when it began. Suddenly, Enji cannot stop longing to be in the same room with you. To go one more moment without you seemed like a sin or some unbearable divine punishment for his greatest flaw: pride."

𝑉𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑟𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑑𝑖𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠, 𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑛 𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑠𝑦𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑦𝑚𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑙𝑦. 𝐴 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛 𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑏𝑒 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑣𝑎𝑖𝑛. 𝑃𝑟𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑜𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑜𝑓 𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑣𝑒𝑠; 𝑣𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑡𝑦, 𝑡𝑜 𝑤𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑤𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝘩𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑜𝑡𝘩𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑢𝑠. -𝐽𝑎𝑛𝑒 𝐴𝑢𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑛

The world works in mysterious ways. He doesn’t know what happened and when it began. Suddenly, Enji cannot stop longing to be in the same room with you. He dreamed about the sight of your eyes, glancing at him with mild contempt. You occupied his thoughts, both innocent and indecent… He was going to go mad if you didn’t share the same affections that he did. He didn’t want you. Not at all. He needed you by his side. To go one more moment without you seemed like a sin or some unbearable divine punishment for his greatest flaw: pride.

When he blatantly insulted you at the first gathering he attended and saw you laugh about it with Ryuko, for once, he felt uneasy. The same woman he had slighted was now the one who controlled him. He noticed the way you looked embarrassed at your family’s antics. It disgusted him that he was obsessing over someone with that kind of background.

It certainly shocked Enji when you stood him up at Sir Yorio’s gathering. How dare you! For him to stoop down and offer to dance with you, only for you to reject him, was truly offensive. A woman far below his social status, refusing to stand up with him. The nerve. 

Every single snarky quip that left your lips swam around in his mind. Your sharp tongue was attractive. The moment he saw you with mud on your dress, walking from your home to Toshinori’s country estate, he was taken aback. For some reason, he couldn’t get rid of that image. The sun hit your face perfectly, creating an enchanting glow that accompanied your delightful countenance. 

“Ms. (L/N).” Your name rolled off his lips so naturally. 

The regrettable moment you had to leave Toshinori’s estate, he helped you into the carriage which would take you home. Something transpired, far beyond his comprehension. Your hand fit so perfectly in his, he couldn’t help but want it to stay there forever. The missing piece to a puzzling man such as himself finally found its way to its rightful spot. It seemed you wished for the same thing. His grip was secure, he felt safe, and you were trapped, staring into the most beautiful cerulean eyes. At the same time, Enji could drown in your eyes forever. The confused look you gave him was endearing when he refused to let go. 

His actions also startled him. Why was he so stuck on you? He flexed his hand, imagining that yours never left as he watched the carriage shrink, moving further from the manor and into the distance. When was the next time he would be allowed to see you? What was it going to take to cure this infatuation?

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

The next time he saw you, was under more unfortunate circumstances. He was riding downtown with Toshinori when he spotted your little party. Unlike his friend, Enji looked unhappy when he saw who you were talking with. You briefly exchanged eye contact with him before he had a clear look of disdain displayed on his face. 

Keigo’s eyes followed yours. He tipped his hat, but Enji made no attempt to return the friendly gesture. He hurried away on his horse without saying a word. The encounter was certainly unusual. Keigo looked discomforted by the interaction. You wondered what could have transpired between the two men that caused such tension. 

That night, at your aunt’s home, you sat down and heard what Keigo had to say about his reunion with Enji. He told his side of the story. He painted Enji as the villain in his narrative. Seeing as how you already found the man so disagreeable, you couldn’t help but believe Keigo’s words. He was much more forthcoming than his old friend; he didn’t seem capable of telling a lie. This new story caused you to see Enji in a new light, only deepening your dislike for the man. 

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Toshinori was a man of his word and held the ball that he promised your sisters. Enji was less unenthusiastic than he usually was. Knowing that he’d get to see you there was the night’s one redeeming feature. He was excited at the thought of getting to lay his eyes on you once more, and it sickened him.

Many of the officers were attending the ball. While linking arms with Toshinori and walking around the ballroom, you searched for Keigo among the redcoats the officers wore. Instead of finding him, you found a pair of familiar blue eyes that looked at you with well-hidden passion and yearning. Enji wanted to tear you away from Toshinori’s arms and have you all to himself. He had many selfish desires, and he usually got what he wanted, but you were the exception. 

Women fawned over him, trying to get a taste of his money. Even Rei tried being overly friendly with him. He cared little for them; he wasn’t looking to fall in love. He was not in search of a wife. Enji was quite content with the life he had. Everything he wanted was in his grasp. But you? You were so close yet so far. There was an uncomfortable amount of emotional space between you and he wanted to close it. Being in the same room wasn’t enough anymore. He wanted to touch you, feel your skin, claim those alluring lips for himself. He wanted to see your whole being without any pesky fabric in the way. If only he could rip that dress off of your body after forcefully pulling you into a vacant bedroom. 

He made his way over to you, but an officer blocked his view. He informed you that Keigo would not be in attendance. Part of it was because of an assignment he had to do, but he also wanted to avoid a certain man… Your younger sisters drug the officer away, leaving you alone in the middle of a crowded room. 

Fortunately, you spotted Ryuko, who was standing alone in the corner. You went to inform her of everything that had happened lately. An unwelcome guest interrupted you. 

“Ryuko, may I introduce you to my cousin, Mr. Tobita?” While remaining civil, you introduced them to each other. He took your hand and led you to dance. As it turns out, the man can’t dance. He went the wrong way, bumping into another lady. It was embarrassing, to say the least. 

Enji watched in amusement as he saw you struggle to keep a smile. You made eye contact with him again, almost sending him a look of desperation. Dancing with him would be better than your current situation. He simply smirked and waltzed around the room, observing everyone. 

While you were busy venting to Ryuko, the very man you were talking about came up to you. The two of you exchanged glances and bowed. “If you are not otherwise engaged, would you do me the honor of dancing the next with me?” Enji’s odd invitation made your eyes widen slightly.

There was no way out of it. You tried coming up with an excuse, but nothing came to mind. He smiled slyly as you fumbled over your words. “I- well I hadn’t... yes. Thank you…” With no escape, you were trapped. He walked off, and you lingered behind for a minute.

“You’d be a fool if you didn’t take him up on his offer. It’s a great compliment that he singled you out.” Ryuko commented. 

“The last time he singled me out was to slander me. Hateful man…” you hissed before going to follow him. 

As the music started to play, you studied Enji’s face. It was the first time you’d ever really taken the time to analyze all of his features. You hated to admit it, but he was handsome. Unusually handsome. 

Finally, your hand had made its way back into his. Even if it was only for a brief moment, that feeling would stick with him until the end of the night. The two of you danced around with your words, conversing back and forth when the time was appropriate. You simply couldn’t bear the silence. 

Couples pranced around the dance floor elegantly, stepping where they needed to. You two moved in sync, never letting your eyes wander. There was a burning passion for the man that you couldn’t get rid of. Whether it was burning hatred, lust, or love, you couldn’t tell. Hostility and tension seemed to be all that came out of your encounters with him. The sexual tension was the one thing that kept you from completely despising Enji and you hated it. 

In an attempt to rile him up, you remarked on Keigo and the last time Enji saw you. “The last time I was in town, I was forming a new acquaintance.” A sly grin spread across your face as the words came out. 

“Mr. Takami’s friendly personality is what allows him to make friends so easily. Though his ability to keep them is debatable.” 

“How unfortunate he must be, to lose your friendship, a loss I am sure he will regret for the rest of his life.” You mocked in an airy and hushed tone. Before Enji could snap back, Mr. Toyomitsu came over to hint at a marriage between your sister and Toshinori. The two of you glanced at the smiling pair before dancing again. “Didn’t you say that you rarely ever forgave? That your hatred, once set in stone, was set indefinitely? Surely a man such as yourself is careful when breeding such hatred.” 

“Of course I am.” Enji scoffed. 

“And I presume you do not let prejudice blind you?” 

“No. What is the purpose of these questions, if I may ask?” He grumbled, disliking your inquiries. 

“Simply a means to figure out your constitution.” You laughed, “Trying to get a good idea of your character.”

“And your findings?” 

“None. I have heard of you on different accounts by different people with different views of you. You shall remain a mystery until I comprehend you.” 

With the dance ending, Enji remained silent. Once the music faded, he supported your hand as you lightly held it over his. “I request that you do not attempt to perceive my character right now. It would do us no favors if you judged wrong.” He claimed as you left the dance floor.

“I may not get another opportunity, so I might as well try while I have the chance.” 

Enji placed himself right next to you and leaned to whisper in your ear. He lowered his voice, making sure only you could hear. “I would by no means suspend any pleasure of yours.” His finger brushed against your arm as he walked away. All the heat in your body rushed to that spot. You wanted his warmth against your skin, you didn’t want him to go. 

And yet, you were standing alone in the corner of a crowded room, fixated on the man who you swore to never like. 

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Much had happened over a short amount of time. You had rejected Mr. Tobita’s marriage proposal and got an earful from your mother. Keigo got engaged to a rich young lady, and Ryuko had gotten engaged to Mr. Tobita. Enji and Toshinori’s party had left his estate, and your sister was disheartened. Everyone had such high expectations for her and Toshinori, only for him to up and leave. 

Now, you were on your own adventure. You, Sir Yorio, and Nejire were going to visit her and Mr. Tobita. They lived in a small house on Lady Chiyo’s property. Greenery grew on the stone, adding to the natural feel of the house. It was a quaint little grey structure with a clear blue sky in the background.

As soon as the carriage stopped, Ryuko and her husband rushed out the door to greet you. They showed you to your rooms while Mr. Tobita kept on about Lady Chiyo’s house and how grand it was. It seemed he was more in love with Chiyo than his own wife.

“Are you happy here?” You asked Ryuko as you watched the other three walk around the garden.

“I am quite content with my situation. I barely see him during the day. He sits in his book room, walks to Lady Chiyo’s every day, and-”

“And you prefer to sit in your own wing of the house.” You finished. Whether it was what she was going to say or not, you stated your mind. Ryuko smiled wistfully, “Yes.” 

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

While you and Ryuko were walking through the woods, along with Nejire, Mr. Tobita came running after you. He was clearly out of breath but told you his news, anyway. Enji and his cousin, Kugo, had arrived. He urged you to make your way back to the house, since they wanted to visit with them.

“Pleasure to finally meet you Ms. (L/N).” Kugo smiled.

“Oh? ‘Finally’, sir?” 

“My cousin speaks of you often.” He informed.

“Ah…” You sighed, looking over at Enji who met your gaze, only hungrier. 

Enji’s eyes never left you, though. There was a protective aura emitting from him. Just in case Kugo spoke or acted out of line, he was ready to come to your aid at any moment. He rested his knuckles against his mouth. Instead of addressing anyone else in the room, he was intently watching and listening to your conversation. 

“Pray tell, why is Mr. Todoroki staring at me?” You asked Kugo, having enough of being watched over like you were some kind of prey, “Have I done or said something he finds offensive?” 

The man stood up from the sofa and meandered over to the table you were seated at. He had no control of his own actions. It was quite an impulsive move, and now he didn’t know what to say. “How is your family?” He choked out. 

“Well.” You replied, “My sister has been in town for quite some time. Have you happened to see her?” 

“No.” Enji lied, “Unfortunately not.” 

“As you can tell, Mr. Todoroki and I are not very close.” 

“Really? I find that hard to believe.” Kugo exclaimed.

“Truly? I believe in first impressions, however, Mr. Todoroki’s good opinion, once lost, is lost forever.” Your words caused him to turn around, and he saw your smiling face, making a joke of him. 

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

The grounds of Lady Chiyo’s property were breathtaking. When the weather allowed, you took advantage of the sprawling greenery and went out for as many walks as you could. Without a cloud in the sky, an endless sea of blue, and shining sun, you wasted no time in getting outside. It was much more productive and enjoyable than sitting in the house.

A beautiful little trail, hidden by the estate’s magnificent trees, was the path you found yourself walking along. You looked up to admire how tall the trees had grown. They stood proud and provided you with shade. The birds sang a lovely little tune, supplying you with a unique sound that rivaled that of the best musicians. 

Enji came trotting through the path from the side. He halted his horse once he saw you. No painting could do you justice, even one made by the best painter in the world could compare to your beauty in person. The sight of you admiring the picture in front of you made his heart pound. Though you said nothing, he believed that you, taking the time to simply look at him, was the greatest compliment he would ever receive. 

And for those few precious minutes, he drank in your appearance. He was hopelessly in love with you. Being in your presence was the best part of his day. He found himself looking forward to seeing you. He always prayed for you to cross paths with him. Even if he simply caught a glimpse of you, suddenly it brightened his entire day. 

Unfortunately, he had other things to do. Enji spurred his horse forward and trotted away. Your presence in his life was much bigger than he expected when he first met you. And somehow… he didn’t mind it. He hated yet loved the feeling of being in love.

[walkingdaryls]

the chosen one

pairing: loki x reader

request: hi i was wondering if you could write a fluffy loki imagine where maybe he’s like an ass to everyone but just kinda claims the reader as like his favorite person or something and honestly you don’t even have to stick to that i’d just love a fluffy loki if you could thank you!

warnings: some swearing, very fluffy

(gotta love fluffy loki. the best loki. also, this is a bit long so i’m sorry about that hehe)

The main thing you loved about the Avengers, your lovely teammates, was the fact that each one had something that set them a part from the rest. Bruce’s buzzing brain, Tony’s ego, Nat’s confidence, and so on. You adored every single one of them.

And what they adored about you was that you were always the “empathetic” Avenger. The one who believed in second changes. In never judging a book by its cover. And the one who believed people could genuinely change for the better. Now, everyone else was also fully aware of the fact that you could easily kick anyone’s ass with your powers or wit. Or both at the same time. But your welcoming, trusting personality definitely shined. Most of your teammates loved you for it, even if they teased you endlessly for being the nice one.

But what really threw your team off was the way you allowed Loki onto the team so easily with no doubts. Years after the incident in New York with the God of Mischief, Thor began asking for Loki’s acceptance into the Avengers. He claimed that even under his sarcasm and rolling eyes, he had changed for the better. The whole team was very hesitant, but after tons of psychological evaluations and close screenings, Loki was slowly turned into an Avenger. He’d aided on plenty of missions, proving himself to be good a bit more every time. But the team still wanted to suffocate him to death every once in a while.

Loki didn’t exactly like any of the Avengers, and he felt like none of them liked him either. But a job was a job.

The only exception was you. You’d been the only one throughout his time as an Avenger that never provoked him, or looked at him in a dirty way. Well, it wasn’t like you two even had conversations. You two simply minded your own business around each other. You never trashed him, so he left you alone. Simple as that. You were never one for hating on someone who was trying to change.

It wasn’t until one night after dinner, when Tony provoked an argument with Loki, that you finally had had enough.

“Someone tell me why we let him be an Avenger again. Please?” Tony said after Loki had dramatically left the room.

Clint sighed, “I’ve been saying, he’s too risky after what he did in New York.”

The others chimed in, and even Thor expressed reluctance about his brother. You couldn’t believe your ears. So you suddenly slammed your hands on the table, causing your friends’ head to snap towards you.

“Are you guys fucking kidding me? I wasn’t aware that we were gonna start contemplating kicking people off the team every time we talk back or start a stupid argument.”

Tony crossed his arms, “That’s not what we’re doing. And it is so much more than just the arguments. Loki-“

“No!” You exclaimed, “It isn’t fair to him! It’s not fair at all. How many of us have shitty pasts we’ve moved on from? How many of us have made stupid mistakes that we will probably regret for the rest of our lives? Most likely all of us. But do we give each other horrible looks every time we see each other? No! We forgive each other and ourselves. That’s the thing about us, Tony: we stick together no matter what.”

No one said anything, so you continued, “And I’m fully aware that Loki’s mistakes are probably far worse than anything we’ve ever done, but the message still stands. I mean, how many missions has he helped us on? The amount of close security and psych evaluations he’s been through just to be part of the team? It’s been years, for fucks sake. Yes, he can be a dick to some of you sometimes, but that’s just him. It’s no reason to continue to hate his guts. Do you guys remember the mission France like 5 months ago that almost went wrong? Loki saved my life. I was this close to being killed. If he hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t be here today with you guys. So I think we owe him some thanks. Especially me.”

You were heated by that point. Everyone continued to stay completely silent, so you stood up.

“I-I’m gonna head to bed now. Just wanted to let y’all know you’re being a bit hypocritical,” And you walked away, catching just a ghost of a smile on Nat’s face.

“Jesus, I think she’s heard one too many of Steve’s speeches,” Rhodey muttered, earning a shove from Steve himself.

But what you didn’t know while you walked away, was that Loki had been standing in the other room, hearing every word you’d just said.

—

Over a week passed since your monologue at the dinner table. No one really mentioned anything about it afterwards, which you were really grateful. All you got was a random pat on the back from Steve and him saying, “We’re all proud of you, kiddo.”

You made your way into the kitchen, which was currently being used by most of your team. 9am in the tower’s kitchen on days off were always pretty hectic. Wearing your usual workout outfit, you made your way towards the mug cabinet.

You were the only one on the team that avoided coffee at all costs. Tea was your go-to. The only other person like you in that aspect was Loki. He was the kind of person you’d caught making tea at 2 in the morning when he couldn’t sleep.

As you reached for the mugs, you realized your favorite one - a minnie mouse one you’d bought at Disney World years ago - was nowhere to be seen. You were pretty sure you’d just put it away last night after helping Tony with the dishes.

“Here.”

You turned around to see Loki, still in his forest green silk robe, holding out your well-loved mug in his hand. You could smell your usual green tea steaming out of the mug.

You stood in shock more a moment before snapping out of your thoughts and taking the mug from him carefully.

“Oh, thank you,” You smiled genuinely. You could feel Nat’s gaze on you a few feet away at the waffle-maker. In fact, a few of the team members’ eyes flickered towards your interaction. Loki’s face remained neutral as he went back to making his own cup of tea.

Thor, noticing this, yawned, “Brother, could you please pour me a cup of-“

“No,” Loki walked out of the room with his tea in one hand, and book in the other. Thor’s mouth slightly fell, glancing back from the cup of tea in your hands to Loki. Steve snorted from the stool next to Thor.

What the fuck just happened? You made your way towards the gym a few floors down with confusion on your face. But mostly warmth in your heart.

The next day, Loki had your green tea waiting for you in your favorite mug once again. And you didn’t hesitate to give him your signature smile and a sweet “thank you”, even if you were a bit taken aback.

And he continued to do this for the next few days. Every morning, without fail. Green tea. Minnie Mouse mug.

At this point, Nat definitely became more aware. She pulled you aside after a while with slightly mischief in her eyes.

“Are you two friends?” She asked genuinely.

“Nat, it’s just tea.”

“Yeah, except Loki’s never even bothered to do something like that with the rest of us. Never.”

You shrugged, “He isn’t Satan. He’s capable of nice things.”

Nat chucked, “Not like this. And it’s just with you. He practically begged you have you as a partner during our last mission.”

It was true, although you wouldn’t exactly say ‘beg’. But he had been pretty adamant on having you as his partner for the mission. He’d asked you kindly first before letting Tony know. In the moment, you hadn’t thought much of it. But looking back at it, you now realized how genuine his actions had been. And you two made a hell of a team that day.

“Maybe he heard your speech that other night,” She smirked, walking away before winking at you. You stood there dumbfounded with a slight redness growing in your cheeks.

That afternoon, with your work done for the day, you made your way towards the main living room with your current book in your hands.

Upon entering the room, you should see Loki’s figure on the couch. He was slightly bent over which only meant he was probably reading as well. You hesitated, but made your way over anyways.

“Is it okay if I read here, too?” You asked quietly. Loki glanced up at you, nodding softly.

“Of course.” Was all he said. You gave him a ghost of a smile before plopping down the the other couch a few feet away. His eyes promptly followed you as you turned to the page marked by your bookmark. You began reading calming, posing no threat to him, so he continued his reading too. Loki felt quite at peace with the sun setting, your soft breathing, and his favorite book in his lap. And the best part: the rest of the Avengers were nowhere to be seen.

“What are you reading?” Your voice sounded softly. Loki placed a finger to mark where he last read before glancing up at you. You feared he’d be pissed off for the interruption, so you continued.

“I mean, I’ve seen you carry that book around for a while now. And it’s all worn out...which usually means it’s a good book,” You chuckled.

Loki watched you carefully before smirking, “Indeed. It’s called Pride and Prejudice. I’ve been told it’s a classic amongst mortals. Have you read it?”

Your face suddenly lit up. Your book was suddenly set aside as you leaned forward excitedly. Loki, although he would never admit it out loud, loved the sparkle forming in your glorious eyes.

“Yes!” You said, “Oh, it’s one of my all time favorites. The movie, too.”

Loki quirked an eyebrow, “There’s a movie? Well, I’ll have to watch that once I’m done with reading it.”

“So you like the book?”

“...Yes. I’m about three-quarters done with it. I have to say, it is rather enjoyable.”

You leaned back against the couch, gazing dreamily at the ceiling, “I’m a sucker for those kinds of romance stories. And I like to think I’m quite like Elizabeth Bennet.”

Loki squinted, “I think so, too.” You lifted your head slightly, making eye contact with the raven-haired God. The soft gaze on his face seemed to mean well, so you allowed for your cheeks to grow a light shade of red.

“Well,” You smiled, looking down at your book, “Let’s get back to reading, yeah?”

Loki nodded, but made sure to keep his eyes on your for a few seconds longer before opening to his page once more.

—

Another couple week passed, and Tony decided to call a ‘very urgent team meeting that has nothing to do with actual team stuff’.

You entered the kitchen where the rest of your teammates were sitting or standing around, chattering amongst themselves. Tony was waiting until everyone arrived before sharing what he needed to say. You slid on a stool next to Nat.

Bucky and Bruce showed up a minute or so later, which meant practically everyone was there. You looked around for the only missing person: Loki. But before you could say anything, the familiar God walked in with Tony followed a few feet behind.

“Alright,” Tony clapper his hands, “Glad we’re all here.” He walked into the kitchen where he served himself some liquor before turning to the rest of you. You felt Loki come up behind you, before situating himself right next to you.

You looked up at him, smiling softly, “Hi.”

“Hello,” He spoke extremely lowly, yet his eyes brightened just a bit more. You felt even more tiny compared to him now that you were sitting and him standing.

“So...what’s this meeting for?” Bruce asked.

“Great question,” Tony said, “I have decided that after tireless back-to-back missions these past few days...we all deserve a treat. That’s why I booked a reservation to the fanciest restaurant within a twenty minute drive. It’s at 8, so I want all of us ready to leave by 7:40.”

“God, Tony you know I hate when you plan stuff like this last minute,” Bruce stressed.

Tony shrugged, “It’s not like any of you losers had plans. Now, go get ready. You’ve all got less than two hours.”

You sighed, “The fanciest place in the city? I hope you’re paying.” A few chuckles sounded from your teammates.

“I wasn’t joking,” You looked at Tony.

The genius rolled his eyes, “Obviously I’m paying. Now, go! All of you. Shoo. Jesus, you try to do a nice thing and people still ask questions-“

Everyone groaned, getting up from their spots and leaving to their rooms to get prepared for the big night. You sent Loki a sympathic glance before going to your floor. You knew he hated going out.

So that’s how you ended up wearing your nicest white, tight-fitting dress that ended a few inches above your knee. It had a long, thick golden embellishment traveling from the bottom to your top left shoulder. It was very classy. And paired with golden heels, you truly felt otherworldly.

You, Nat, and Wanda were all up in each other’s bedrooms, trying to decide each other’s hair and makeup. Wanda was especially skilled with eyeshadow looks for some reason. And Nat more with hair. Your two blessings, you called them.

You three joined the rest of the guys in front of tower, all piling in the long, iconic Stark limo. You definitely hadn’t missed the look Loki gave you as you walked past him to get into the vehicle. He didn’t say anything, so neither did you. You just sent him your signature smile.

Champagne was passed around once in the limo with flashing lights. You were squished between Thor and Loki, which wasn’t exactly a complaint. Thor was cracking jokes to you and calling you “my lady” the entire ride. It was a blast, and you hadn’t even arrived yet. Loki on the other hand, stayed quiet as a mouse. He only said “thank you” when you passed him a glass, and that was it.

Upon arriving, your breath was almost taken away at how fancy the restaurant truly was. Tony never disappointed. Your team’s reserved table had each seat labeled with each of your names on paper.

Nobody noticed, but Loki created an illusion to switch you and Bucky’s seats so you’d be sitting next to him.

Loki allowed you to slide into your chair first before sitting down next to you. He immediately reached for the menu. Seeing that there weren’t enough left for you, you silently read over his shoulder. Without saying anything, he slightly lowered the menu to give you a better look.

Hours passed, and the entire table had fallen a bit tipsy. You were stuffed with more than enough raviolis and champagne. You even accidentally hiccuped while trying to tell a story to the rest, but everyone teased you so much for it, you couldn’t even finish what you were going to say. But how could you be mad? You were having the funniest, and most lovely night of your life with your second family. The rest of the restaurant probably hated all of your guts for your loudness and endless laughter, but none of you cared.

“I’ll be back,” Loki had whispered from beside you. You turned your head, watching him walk away towards the restaurant’s balcony doors. You looked back at your team, seeing they were all occupied with themselves, and followed Loki.

Feeling the fresh breeze outside somehow made you and your bloating feel a bit better. You spotted the familiar dark-haired man gazing out at the buzzing city at the edge of the balcony.

You sucked in a breath before speaking, “May I join you?”

He looked back, “Of course.”

It was always of course, you thought.

Your heels clattered lightly on the tile floor as you made your way next to him. You didn’t know if it was the champagne in your system, but you found yourself standing extremely close, touching shoulders with Loki. But he didn’t make any efforts to move away.

“You seemed awfully quiet during dinner. Is everything okay?” You asked.

Loki looked at his hands, “Just not the ‘going out’ type, remember?” You nodded, looking back at the skyline.

“You know, Loki,” you said, “I never properly thanked you for saving my life back in France months ago.”

You’d had a couple slip ups in missions before, but the entire team remembered that traumatic mission in France extremely well. You truly had been on the verge of dying. So close. But Loki had gotten in there and saved your ass. And Loki remembered, too. But it hurt him too much to think back on it. He’d been so close to never seeing your bright smile, or your infectious giggles again.

“Y/N, I-“

The alcohol in your system didn’t stop you from rambling, “I know I’m late, like, months late, but I just wanted you to know. I am so thankful. I literally owe you my life-“

“You don’t owe me anything, Y/N, heavens,” Loki watched you with a concerned gaze.

You blushed, “Well, I needed to get it off my chest. So, thank you Loki.”

“Well, I couldn’t afford losing the only person on this team I can somewhat stand.”

Your eyes flickered to his, seeing him wear an amused smirk on his face.

“I’m-I’m your favorite Avenger?” You teased. The God rolled his eyes.

Your smile was making your cheeks burn, “FYI...you’re my favorite, too. Well, maybe next to Nat.”

Loki let out a small, breathy laugh. You joined in, making him stare at you once more. His stare was so intense, you didn’t know what to do except awkwardly stare back.

Loki wanted more. He yearned to hear your voice again. So that’s why he said the next thing without thinking.

“You look beautiful tonight. Well, every day, of course. I forgot to tell you when you walked of your room a couple of hours ago, so I’m letting you know now.”

You were so thankful it was dark out, for you just knew that the look on your face was embarassing. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing.

“I think you’re beautiful, too,” You blurted. Loki gave you the softest gaze you’ve ever seen, so you couldn’t help but carefully place your hand on of top his.

Loki tenderly lifted your hand before pressing his lips to the tip of your fingers. All you could do was watch, breathless. He set your hand down before grabbing both sides of your face, and pressing another soft kiss, but to your forehead this time.

“That’s why we’re each other’s favorites,” He smiles cheekily at you.

You giggled, resting your head on his shoulder.

“Indeed.”

—

[star-going-supernova]

I would certainly be interested in reading the unofficial version of Damsell in Distress if it's not a problem. - Elsie

Ask and ye shall receive! It starts immediately after Maddie tells Godzilla that her dad was kidnapped and includes the beginning of the original ending. It's also incomplete, as I stopped writing the murdery part maybe 2/3 of the way through.

Please be warned, what happens isn't nice. If KiaRL was too much for you, maybe skip this one. It's similar to what Godzilla did to those kidnappers, but it's from one of their POVs, so, like, there's a bit of detail in some places. I wouldn't say it's overly graphic, but... yeah. Exercise caution.

• • •

Kidnapping, when done right and with fellow professionals, was a lucrative business. Blake Curtis knew that well.

It was with well-earned confidence that he and the other seven members of their homegrown operation relaxed in the nice office space they’d rented out for this particular venture. The building was decently far from the mark’s—no pun intended—place of residence, but not so far from the location of the organization he belonged to.

You didn’t want the fingers to start rotting in the mail, after all. And sending them in anything other than a padded envelope was bound to be memorable to the wrong people.

Being forgettable was, in all ways, the name of their game.

Blake and every last one of his associates were plain. Not a one of them was particularly attractive, or had stand-out features, or had public interactions outside of the most basic, scripted conversations. And for that reason, no one every gave them a second look. No one ever remembered them more than a few minutes after an encounter—and they certainly wouldn’t have been able to describe them.

It was an art form, and a well-paying one, at that.

Completely unconscious in one of the other rooms in the office was their newest target, a man reportedly high in the rankings of Monarch. Mark Russell: divorced—the ex was dead—father of two children—one of whom was also dead—and living with his young daughter out in the middle of nowhere. Important enough to his peers to be worth a ransom, but not so important to have a bodyguard.

They couldn’t have asked for a better setup.

With the target secured and unable to cause any problems, it was just a matter of waiting. Four of his associates had broken out a pack of cards and were coming up with increasingly ridiculous ways to cheat at their game. Alice, his cousin, was reading Pride and Prejudice by the window, sipping at some fruity drink she’d made for herself.

Ryan was napping on the couch, his hat covering his face, and good ole Winnie, the leader of their group, was typing away at her laptop.

Blake sighed, content, and leaned back in his comfortable office chair. He took a drag of his cigarette and let his eyes drift half-closed. The toe of his shoe absently slid along the ground, lazily spinning him back and forth.

A faint tremble went through his chair.

Off to his side, Alice made a dreamy noise. A burst of laughter rose up from the card players.

Another tremble, slightly stronger than the first, had him peeking his eyes open. An earthquake, perhaps? They didn’t have any neighbors in the building—they’d made sure of that—but no one else seemed to be noticing the shudders passing through the structure.

They began to increase in intensity, and the time between them grew shorter.

Snorting awake when a mug rattled on the coffee table, Ryan pushed his hat up and raised his head. “What’s doin’ that?” he asked groggily.

Alice and Winnie looked over at him. Blake stood, keeping his stance wide as the tremors grew worse.

“I don’t think this is how earthquakes work,” Alice said, sliding a ribbon into her well-worn book.

The four playing cards, who Blake now saw were sharing a couple bottles of alcohol between them, set their game aside, still giggling.

“A train?” Blake suggested. “Helicopters?”

The windows rattled, and outside, someone screamed.

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” Omar said, stumbling up from his seat. He took a swig from one of the bottles. “I rem’ber this scene.” He stared into the narrow opening with one eye squinted shut.

“What are you doing?” Eli asked, less drunk-looking than the other three.

“Lookin’ for ripples. That’s how you know a t-rex is coming.”

“It won’t work if you’re holding the bottle, moron,” Dennis, which was wonderfully ironic, said. Blake didn’t pay them any attention, though, as he went over to one of the windows.

He could hear more people screaming, and despite a poor vantage point, he was just able to make out a number of people running frantically down the road. A car swerved wildly around the fleeing populace, crashing into a light pole. The driver climbed out, appearing to be muttering in a panic to himself, and took off at a sprint.

“Something’s happening out there,” he said to Alice as she joined him.

Sandy chuckled. “Maybe it’s a monster attack.” She stood and cracked her back.

An enormous crash jolted the building so badly, everyone standing found themselves grasping desperately for something to hold on to. Ryan tumbled off the couch with a yelp. Omar lost his footing entirely and fell with a strained chuckle. The glass bottle hit the edge of the table and shattered.

While Omar complained about getting bits of glass in his hands, Blake, closely followed by Alice and Winnie, ran to the roof access the office space came with.

“Maybe something crashed,” he huffed out. “A plane, or a huge pile-up—”

“If only we could be so lucky,” Winnie said, and then they were bursting out onto the roof.

He heard his cousin whisper a curse in another language, his own jaw going slack as his mind went blank with an instinctual fear.

Not a few blocks away, Godzilla stood between high-rises. He moved slowly, almost carefully—if you were willing to personify such a monster—but every few footfalls, he seemed to step particularly hard, shaking the earth.

The three of them remained frozen, watching with wide eyes, as Godzilla growled, periodically swinging his head around. Like he’s looking for something, Blake thought.

He—like most of the world—had seen footage from at least one of the past incidents involving the Titans. Godzilla in San Francisco had been all anyone could talk about for a few weeks, and the clip of him leaving the city always seemed to be playing on one news channel or another. A sensational tragedy.

It didn’t do the real thing justice. Such a massive creature—he hadn’t comprehended before now just how large Godzilla truly was. And it was different to see him with his own two eyes, where the possibility of an internet hoax couldn’t explain a thing.

“Whatever he’s doing here can’t be good,” Winnie finally said. “We should leave before any other Titans show up.”

She vanished back into the office, leaving Blake and his cousin to stare at the monster towering over them.

A disbelieving huff left Alice. “That’s not something you see everyday, huh?”

“Are we supposed to run away?” Blake asked. “Or is it like a tornado drill?”

“If Winnie says we’re leaving, then we’re leaving.” She paused as Godzilla leaned forward to sniff at a skyscraper. A few more steps, and he’d be walking entirely away from them. As it was, Blake figured someone with a better throwing arm could probably hit the Titan from where they were standing. Alice shook her head and turned toward the roof access. “C’mon, we gotta grab Russell. We’ll have to figure something else out if the drop-off gets changed.”

Since her back was facing Godzilla, Blake was the only one who say the way the monster’s head turned in their direction. His spines pulsed blue, sending a shock of fear down Blake’s own spine, and he took two thunderous steps closer to their high rise.

Blake stumbled back, suddenly unable to breath. His focus narrowed down to those inhuman, burning eyes, suddenly centered on him. His reaction must have caught Alice’s attention, because he distantly heard her scream out behind him.

For some reason, hearing her scream like that was what made Blake snap out of his daze, just in time to see Godzilla’s claw-tipped hand-paw thing closing in on their roof.

The building shook when he made contact, a web of cracks spiraling out from Godzilla’s palm. Blake lost his balance entirely, landing painfully on his tailbone. Even then, he couldn’t completely shake himself out of his stupor enough to stand, much less run.

After sniffing again, Godzilla started growling, low and dangerous. The sound of it nearly paralyzed Blake.

He managed to pull himself backward in an awkward crab-walk until his back hit the short raised ledge surrounding the roof. Through it all, he couldn’t look away from Godzilla’s eyes.

Could an animal really feel as much fury as Blake thought he could see in them?

A commotion below finally ripped away his attention. Ryan had emerged, stumbling for the soccer-mom-style van they had parked across the street. He was emitting a constant stream of panicked gibberish. Sandy was standing at the base of the building, hollering at him to hurry up and stop tripping over himself.

“Hey!”

Blake whipped around. Dennis was standing in the doorway with an impatient look on his face. “Didn’t you hear Winnie? We’re leaving!”

An odd buzzing interrupted his attempt to answer, and both men looked up in surprise. Godzilla, was above them, leaning on the roof. He had blue eyes now, Blake realized.

Dennis made a strangled sound. “What the hell—”

Godzilla’s mouth opened as the buzzing seemed to reach its peak, and a bright blue beam of light shot out from between his razor sharp teeth. Blake cried out and curled up into a ball. The heat from being so close to the beam was painfully intense.

Dennis was huddled in the stairwell when Blake managed to look over at him, ears ringing and spots popping in his vision. His jeans were darker on the insides of his thighs. Blake couldn’t even blame him.

As his hearing returned after a few seconds, he became aware of a terrible shrieking. Leaning up to look over the ledge at the ground, he stared uncomprehending for a moment before the reality of what he was seeing hit him. He turned and heaved, throwing up his lunch beside him.

He caught sight of Dennis rushing over, but he wasn’t able to warn him away fast enough, and after a moment, his colleague was vomiting over the edge of the roof.

The road below was nothing more than a scorched crater, their van reduced to a smoldering mound of metal. Ryan was completely gone, just vaporized in the heat of the laser-like beam Godzilla had shot.

But that wasn’t the worst of it.

Having been close to the beam himself, Blake’s skin felt tight, like after getting a bad sunburn. What little of his skin he could see was reddened, but not blistering.

Sandy, who’d been down there with Ryan, hadn’t been as lucky.

She must have just ventured away from the building when Godzilla fired, not close enough to share Ryan’s fate, but closer than Blake.

What he’d seen would haunt his nightmares for years to come, he suspected. The writhing mass of flesh, with bubbling sores, all melted in on herself, was unlike anything he’d ever seen. The roof was too high for him to have seen details, but he’d gotten the impression that Sandy’s face was nothing more than a smooth plane, her open mouth the only remaining orifice.

Dennis was babbling as he remained hunched against the ledge, but Blake couldn’t make himself understand any of the words.

Gagging over the sour taste lingering on his tongue, Blake shrunk back as he looked up at Godzilla, just in time to see the monster huff with his eyes half-lidded. It was an expression of satisfaction if he’d ever seen one.

“Wha’s goin’ on?” Blake heard Omar say.

Godzilla’s hand lifted from the roof, just as the man drunkenly stumbled through the door.

“Someone’s screamin’ down there,” he told them, rather pointlessly. “Winnie’s all worked up ’bout it.” He kept walking, apparently somehow missing the giant lizard monster looming right over them.

Blake saw it coming a moment too late. “Omar—!” he cried, reaching out as if he could shove the man to safety.

But he couldn’t, so he watched helplessly as Omar squinted in confusion as Godzilla’s hand slammed back down, squishing the man with disturbing ease.

He'd seen a snake, once, flattened on the roadside. Like a flat drawing. Omar was reduced to that, to a thin, bloody pile of viscera. His jeans were still visible, bunched up on themselves. Empty. Leaking.

Dennis groaned and threw up again, this time, on their side of the ledge. While he was distracted, Godzilla’s blood-dripping hand swept upward, on a collision course for the both of them. Blake yelled wordlessly and dove forward, ducking.

With a meaty thwack, Dennis was swatted up into the air. He shrieked as he fell, and the abrupt silence made Blake gasp out a terrified sob.

Why is this happening? he wondered hysterically, scrabbling at the rough concrete to try and put some distance between himself and the monster. But there was no safety to be found.

Godzilla once more returned his bloody hand to the rooftop, and Blake heard the way the building began to crumbled beneath the pressure. A large hole broke through the top floor’s ceiling with a grating crash, Godzilla’s hand mercilessly sinking into the building.

It was then that Blake heard the Alice’s screams.

(a few more deaths that I never wrote happen here. Blake is the only one left alive)

For a second, Blake thought he was about to witness Godzilla swallow a man down whole. That Mark Russell—who should be glad to still be unconscious—would disappear behind those teeth and never be seen again.

Instead, Godzilla made a rumbling noise so very different from his growls, and turned his back on the building. There was a mind-boggling gentleness in that blood-stained jaw, holding a human as if he were aware of how delicate the man’s body was.

It scared him, the possibility that Godzilla could be aware like that. Intelligent.

Blake slumped bonelessly against the rooftop beside the large hole and breathed a shaky sigh of relief. The blue sky was suddenly blocked by something gray, casting him in a shadow, and his last thought was of realization—that Godzilla’s tail was about two seconds away from demolishing the building and him with it.

He didn’t even have time to close his eyes.

• • •

Only a few hours after Maddie’s brief interaction with Godzilla, reports of the King entering a decently sized city reached Castle Bravo. He didn’t seem to be moving with aggression, or in response to a threat, so G-team was left largely on standby.

Everything changed quickly. There were suddenly alarms going off, people shouting, and panic spread like wildfire through the halls.

Maddie watched with a dull sense of bewilderment as Castle Bravo employees ran in and out of the control room, frantic and jittery. Having grown tired of sitting numbly on the floor, Maddie pushed to her feet and carefully wandered through the chaos.

Unwilling to interrupt anyone, she merely listened in, and through her unsubtle eavesdropping, learned Godzilla had apparently gone berserk on some humans in an office building. Just straight up murdered eight people.

No one seemed to know why—whether he’d been provoked somehow, or whether he’d simply gone into a city with the intent to kill.

Griffin suddenly appeared at Maddie’s shoulder, startling her. “C’mon, kid, we’re getting you out of here, all right?” She gently but firmly wrapped her fingers around Maddie’s upper arm and smoothly guided her out of the room.

“You’re not going after him?” she asked, hurrying to keep up.

“We will, but only after we get the handful of civilians back to the mainland.” She cast Maddie an apologetic glance. “Emergency protocols, kid. Ilene’ll join you soon to stay with you until we get things figured out.”

An Osprey being piloted by Griffin and another G-teamer took off a few minutes later, carrying seven civilians who had all been at Castle Bravo for different reasons. Maddie recognized two of them from the investigators for her dad’s kidnapping, and she tightly gripped the edge of her seat. If Godzilla’s totally uncharacteristic attack got her dad killed or something because Monarch had to set the case aside, she’d be having words with him.

Even with aircraft as fast as the Ospreys, the flight still took over an hour. Long enough for Maddie to slip in and out of a doze, never quite falling all the way asleep. It left her feeling even more tired by the time they landed.

They literally couldn’t have made the journey shorter, since the Osprey dropped them off within throwing distance of the ocean. A Monarch warehouse sat in a large industrial park, complete with an impressive pier jutting out into the water.

While the other civilians went inside, Maddie wandered out to the end of the enormous dock, where she sat down and dangled her feet off the side. It was high enough up that she couldn’t have touched the water even if she hung off the edge completely.

She lowered herself to her back and tried to keep her mind nice and empty. No thoughts were better than bad ones.

She wasn’t sure how long she stayed like that, though it couldn’t have been too long, when she heard the splashing of something moving through the water.

Maddie sat up, instantly surprised to see Godzilla approaching the pier, his head held oddly above the surface. She’d never seen him swim like that.

He rumbled at her as he got closer. Squinting, Maddie saw that he had something in his mouth, held careful between his teeth. She couldn’t tell what it was.

An animal of some sort, maybe? Regardless, she quickly stood and backed up, since Godzilla seemed to be aiming to deposit his cargo where she’d been sitting. He leaned up, the rumble only growing in strength, and carefully spit out the thing in his mouth. She had only a moment to appreciate how hilariously smug he looked with himself as he sank back to a comfortable depth, and then she was looking at the creature he’d presented her with.

She couldn’t have been more shocked if she’d been hit by a bolt of lightning. Maddie darted forward and collapsed painfully to her knees with a strangled little yelp.

“Dad!” she cried, frantically tugging and pushing at him. “Dad, please!

He was definitely breathing, which almost made her burst into tears on its own, but then his eyes sluggishly opened at her call, and Maddie gracelessly collapsed against him. Hugging someone who was half-unconscious and entirely restrained was awkward at best, but it was still one of the top five hugs she’d ever participated in in her life.

She heard him slur something back, quiet and raspy and still very out of it, but she was pretty sure it was her name.

“I should go get someone,” Maddie realized. It felt like she’d been dropped into a world that moved twice as fast as she did, or like she’d been trapped in slow motion since her dad had been kidnapped.

Luckily—because she wasn’t sure she could have pried herself away from her dad—someone seemed to have taken notice of Godzilla’s appearance, and a crew of people were already running out to them.

Before they could reach her, Maddie turned to Godzilla with a lump in her throat. “Thank you,” she said, trying to inject every ounce of her sincerity, and then some, into those two, utterly inadequate words.

[quoteablebooks]

Genre: Historical Fiction, Mystery, Retelling, Adult

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Summary:

'Reader, I murdered him.' JANE STEELE is a brilliant Gothic retelling of JANE EYRE from Edgar-nominated Lyndsay Faye, for fans of LONGBOURN and PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES. 'I loved it' - Elly Griffiths.

Like the heroine of the novel she adores, Jane Steele suffers cruelly at the hands of her aunt and schoolmaster. And like Jane Eyre, they call her wicked - but in her case, she fears the accusation is true. When she flees, she leaves behind the corpses of her tormentors.

A fugitive navigating London's underbelly, Jane rights wrongs on behalf of the have-nots whilst avoiding the noose. Until an advertisement catches her eye. Her aunt has died and the new master at Highgate House, Mr Thornfield, seeks a governess. Anxious to know if she is Highgate's true heir, Jane takes the position and is soon caught up in the household's strange spell. When she falls in love with the mysterious Charles Thornfield, she faces a terrible dilemma: can she possess him - body, soul and secrets - and what if he discovers her murderous past?

*Opinions*

This book has been sitting in my “to read” list on Goodreads for a couple of years easily, so when the next books in the series I am currently binging didn’t show up on time, I figured it was time to give it a try. Jane Steele is set in a universe where Jane Eyre is a novel and our main character, Jane Steele, reflects on her life is similar and different from her favorite literary character. Given that setup, it is not hard to guess some of the beats of the novel, but Jane Steele is a very different character than the sometimes meek Jane Eyre and how she faces a world that is not gentle or caring for anyone, but especially young women. Now it had been a while since I’ve read Jane Eyre, and it took me a while to truly enjoy the literary classic, but I believe Jane Steele is a retelling that masterfully pulls on the reader’s memories of the classic, for better or worse, while weaving a story that is truly its own. As I mentioned above, I don’t remember the finer details of Jane Eyre as it’s been a couple of years since I’ve read it. That being said, much like the source material, I found the time at the school to drag a little pace-wise, but it is important to understanding both Janes. When Jane got back to Highgate House I had a hard time putting the book down, but it took me a good couple of days to get to that point. Still, this retelling really dives into the darker areas of England during this time period, of the schools, girls were forced into, and the English interests abroad. Jane Eyre does not make the world seem easy for young women without means by any means, but Jane Steele delves into the dirt and darkness because she believes she belongs there and that gives the reader a look into the lives of women we don’t see in Jane Eyre.

As for English interest abroad, the novel does not pull any punches in regards to the East Indian Trading Company and what they did in India, though this novel was focused on Punjab. The information about Sikhism and those that follow that religion was enlightening and I’m happy that Faye included reference books to look into the history of the region and religion further. That being said, so many novels of the time (that I’ve read) completely ignore what is happening in India and what the British presence, either as the East India Trading Company, military, or missionaries is rarely addressed. Faye had the benefit of hindsight and no concern of dealing with being accused of treason, but I found Jane Steele’s London more well-rounded and real than Jane Eyre’s, even with all its ugliness. I love how Faye handles Jane’s character arc and what it says about how childhood events and traumas shape how we see ourselves. If Jane hadn’t felt as if she killed Edwin (who deserved it and would have been a beast of a person like Jane Eyre’s cousin ended up being) then she would have never run to Lowan Bridge School and none of the other deaths would have followed. Jane believed herself wicked due to how those around her treated her so wicked she became. While it is easy to excuse all of Jane’s murders, as Mr. Thornfield does in the end, it is clear to see why Jane has such a low opinion of herself but also why she trust her out abilities, maybe too much confidence in her own abilities. When someone reframes her childhood and her relationship with Clarke, it changes everything about the Jane way sees herself. Obviously, it doesn’t absolve all her sins, but it makes her feel as if she is worth something and that can change a lot about the way someone moves through the world. The secondary characters are also vibrant and well-rounded. From the enigmatic new residents of Highgate House to the girls that suffered in Lowan Bridge School and even Jane’s mother and Agatha. No matter how much page time they received, every character felt real and that they had a life outside of their interaction with Jane. The villains are horrible but in ways that make sense and the heroic characters are far from perfect. Mr. Thornfield has his own trauma to deal with, but that makes him a good fit for a romantic partner as Jane’s whole life has been made up of traumas. It is a match that makes much more sense than Jane Eyre and Mr. Rochester honestly. There is also the representation of non-straight and non-white characters, in a positive light, which is always nice to see in a historical novel. While it took me a while to become invested in the novel and Jane’s story, much like Jane Eyre, I came to love just about everything about the book. I will probably pick up a physical copy at some point just so I can reread it because I admit that I read through the last couple of chapters so quickly because I was anxious about what would happen next. It’s been a long time since that happened. Jane Steele is a four-and-a-half-star book that I am rounding up to a five-star. The half star was the slow start and the distance between Jane and the reader at the start, which I know emulates the original text but I wasn’t a fan of it there either. While I expected Jane to be a little more wicked, I truly enjoyed my time with this novel.

[charityfaithfull]

Connection and Plot Ideas

THE CLOSE FRIENDS charity’s circle that she interacts with usually daily. They know her ins and outs. She is drawn to people who feels she engage in both mental and emotional states. She is talkative and likes to solve problems. They are an academic bunch, but they’re interests can diverge into many fields.

open connection

THE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS Charity is a halfblood with wizard family on her father’s side. She would know some other wizard children, however she is much more engaged with the muggle world because she is closer to her mom

@frcnklcngbottom Frank Longbottom - They don’t speak all that often, everything being more mild acquaintanceship in the end.

open connection

LOVE/HATE DORM MATES   Charity isn’t the most typical Ravenclaw. Often her diverse experience and views can conflict with those near her.

@allaircss​ Ellie Allaire - It’s so bad. It’s only gotten worse. The more pets Ellie has brought, the more posters and records Charity hangs about the room. Ellie is resistant to Charity’s salt-of-the-concrete-city essense, and Charity is resistant to Ellie’s taste for the lavish.

@chvrrys - Usually the buffer for their rather…intense living situation. The pair get along much better. Unfortunately, their different life experiences and desires tend to be more of a wedge than discussion point.

@ivytravers - She may be the most relatable of the bunch for Charity, the most similar sentiments. Charity understands her anger with the world, but perhaps not how she believes she can handle things on her own. While Charity knows the grime of the world, Ivy knows the underbelly of the elite.

open connection

THE INSURGENTS  Someone who works with her in all respects for her beliefs in changing the view anti-muggle and muggleborn sentiment

@macmcry​ Mary MacDonald - The pair had plenty to relate to since Charity lived half her life in the muggle world. She was all about helping Mary in any little way, and they don’t mind breaking the rules to get it done.

LOST FRIEND   This is the person who she became unlikely friends with. She’s a great teacher and tries to experience things fully. However, she has been discouraged by how sour things all turned. It’s likely this was someone pureblood who thought they could resist the high pressures of family and social circles. It was a great disappointment to Charity when they could not.

open connections

FRENEMIES   Engage her mind, she lives for conversation and will try to prove she is the smartest person in the room

@frcnklcngbottom Frank Longbottom - Occasionally, Charity can enjoy having the upper hand in an intellectual conversation too much, and Frank isn’t one to enjoy that. Just as equally, Charity does not want to be bested by him.

open connection

ENEMIES   Come at her death eaters! She may be a pacifist in most situations, but she can make enemies easily. She openly shares her opinions and thoughts, which not everyone agrees with. This has gotten her into trouble for not just attempting to rework the educational system while she’s still in it, but for speaking out of turn because she knows she has to.

open connection

THE SILENCER - Somebody trying incredibly hard to get her to shut up about her pro muggle and pro muggleborn talking points. It’s a real battle because she is so well spoken and so clever. This person is getting to the point of considering more extreme means to get her to stop.

Open Connection

EXES  Charity is mature in that she has a deeper understanding of herself. Yet, she feels really young and doesn’t actively try to take things too far in relationships. She has a crew of muggle friends who she wanders around with, one of whom she has a special connection with, but because they are far apart most of the time, she chooses to not pursue anything. At Hogwarts, she knows she can’t worry herself with that and likely had at least one serious relationship.

open connection

DECISION MAKER Charity is becoming indecisive about her future. It’s a typical smart kid, told they were gifted when they were young and now they are suffering, type deal. She’s considering making her way to muggle university, but this person thinks her skills are better put to use in the magical world. They may even suggest she become a teacher...

open connection

FLING In some ways Charity is more suited to flings, she can be endearingly sweet but also finds her brain just moving too fast. She is someone who is hard to keep up with.

@aciiers​ Sirius Black (summer 1976) - She never thought he was dumb, just a little stupid. It was a good summer to forget and live a bit. Charity appreciated his attempts to mimic her conversational style, it was charming in the end. However, continuing into the school year wasn’t even a thought that crossed her mind.

open connection

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE   I always struggled to think of character comparisons, but yeah I think Charity is basically Lizzie Bennett. This is her Mr. Darcy. It isn’t someone who she has to be end game with, however this is someone from the complete opposite world. They can come off rude, but their choice to consistently interact intrigues her. It would take a lot of releasing their own pride to make anything happen, otherwise its all tension. basically gimme wizard pride and prejudice

@dirtbvg - Overlapping with plot for Star-Crossed Lovers. This was never intentional, and up until the last minute she had every doubt. Now that it’s summer, things may cool down. Their blossoming friendship can be less hidden in the shadows when its behind the wall of her London pub. But it won’t last as long as their own prejudices persist.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

book blogging #6: I Choosing My Own Romantic Adventure

a humble recap of my journey through My Lady’s Choosing: An Interactive Romance Novel, by Kitty Curran and Larissa Zageris.

in case anyone isn’t familiar with the premise of a choose your own adventure book, it fucking slaps: at each critical crossroad in the story you’ll be offered a handful of actions to take, each of which will direct you to a different page where you’ll see how your fate plays out. 

I did a lot of the Goosebumps choose your owns as a kid and those usually ended with me either dying or transformed into a horrifying monster no matter how much I frantically flipped back and forth trying to cheat the system, so I felt like an absolute genius playing through this book purely on the basis that I never managed to die.

what did I accomplish? well, in order for that explanation to make any sense, first I have to talk about our romantic options. 

as depicted on the cover, starting in the top left and working clockwise, we have Garraway Craven, who seems to be a bit of a mishmash between Heathcliff (ew) and that bitch that Jane Eyre gets involved with (double ew). spoiler alert, I don’t know a ton about Garraway or his storyline because I never got anywhere near it. I’m not nearly dedicated enough to book blogging to run off to some godforsaken moor and flirt it up with a maniac just for the #content.

next we have Sir Benedict Granville, our obligatory Mr. Darcy stand in. if you know anything about me and the normal amount that I like Pride and Prejudice you’ll be unsurprised to learn that he was a priority on my romancing to-do list, but reader beware: he’s not fucking worth it. more on this in a moment.

the dashing kilt-wearing man on the horse is Captain Mac; that’s a nickname, but I’ve forgotten what his full name was. he seems to be more a parody of the entire “rugged yet sensitive Scotsman” trope so popular among romance novelists. in case it’s not obvious yet, Curran and Zageris are extremely aware of the tropes of the genre, and have an absolutely delightful time tossing them around like birdies in a spirited game of badminton.

lastly we have Lady Evangeline, a scandalous lady of adventure and academia. she parties, she knows her way around London’s dens of iniquity, she can translate Egyptian hieroglyphs. if you read that and thought “wow, gay,” you are extremely correct.

those are the four big names, but it’s also more than possible to wander off on a sidequest and find love with a secondary character. Curran and Zageris really do manage to cram an impressive amount of story and options into a relatively small book, and while the story sometimes feels a bit rushed or lacking in detail, it’s entirely excusable given the constraints of the medium. 

so, the all important question: whomst did I romance?

first, of course, I did my queer due diligence and and went after Evangeline. it’s a bit of a slow build to get to her, but once you allow her to whisk you away from England for an adventure in Egypt things really take off. there’s action, revenge, kidnapping, chase scenes, an ancient love temple that can only be discovered through the power of orgasms, you name it.

(a note about sex in this book, since I know that’s not everyone’s cup of tea: while you can certainly find yourself in some saucy situations, it never gets much more explicit than some vague descriptions and double entendres so obvious that they’re really just single entendres.)

after Evangeline I set my sights on Benedict, but ultimately determined him a lost cause. there is a fairly intriguing mystery of familial drama to unravel around Benedict, which is fun, but the man himself is insufferable. using banter to conceal romantic tension is one thing, but there comes a point where a dude is rude enough that you have to bail - which I did, in order to help Mac out with the orphanage he runs for children who have lost their parents in the war.

(what war? you know. The War.)

Mac’s a fun one, even if his phonetic accent is painful to read, and according to the narration the two of you can possibly invent the concept of having sex in a shower. his plotline gets a little convoluted once the orphanage burns down and you have to move all the orphans to a falling-down castle in the Highlands (I know) and at risk of spoiling a chose your own adventure novel I ended up absconding with my childhood sweetheart to work as a British spy. wild!

as I said, I wasn’t nearly curious enough to find out what happens if you go to the moors, but I did circle back to Evangeline’s Egypt storyline to go after a minor character who seemed like prime romance material. his name is Kamal, he curates a museum, and the narrative really goes out of its way to mention how bookish and boyishly handsome he is before giving you a chance to go on a date tour of the market with him. I went after Kamal, a bit of action ensued, and the two of us ended up happily married with a kickass museum and several children to whom Evangeline is a doting godmother, which isn’t a bad ending at all.

overall? it’s silly, it’s fun, I’d absolutely nab another book of this nature. I appreciate how far out of its way the book goes to avoid giving defining physical characteristics to the POV character, meaning she could plausibly look like almost anything, although there’s a definite assumption of her being able-bodied and cisgender. 

there are a few less than perfect slip ups: the book often wobbles on that line between parodying how other books exoticize Egypt and also shamelessly exoticizing Egypt, and while including a f/f romance is cool it does feel a little token-y when Evangeline is the only female love interest among at least half a dozen men. if there were any other female options they must have been out on the moors with Craven, because I certainly never found them (and believe me, I wanted to find them). 

overall? sure, pick it up. the worst thing that could happen is marrying an abysmally old man who dies on your wedding day and leaves you an impressive fortune. 

[bbelphie]

astra, i feel like we don’t know you at all!! say, can you tell us who is your most favorite character in obey me, and who is the least? love you ❤️❤️❤️❤️

ok so THIS was difficult snxjms and as you asked afterwards, i also added why i feel this way way about them! love u 💖 sorry this turned out long tho

my list:

BELPHEGOR — i mean, it’s kinda obvious, right? (cough bbelphie is the name of the blog) ever since the start of the game, i wandered about who the fuck that resting bitch face boy was. like, honestly curious. when we met him at the attic, the first thing i thought about belphie was how manipulative he was, and although i’d have hated him, his situation and the game’s universe in general made me reconsider my choice. i found out that he was so much more complex than what i first thought of him. and i LOVE characters like that. belphegor had his reasons, his own past and way of seeing things and i just wanted to know him better, not just because i was curious, but because i’ve grown to like him, in a way. it wasn’t instantaneous, but i kinda saw that coming, you know? i’m not sure if i can explain well how i feel about him (i can’t express my feelings well in any way cof) but belphegor was the character that i was most eager to know about. (ouch i have so many other things to say about him) also he’s a sassy little shit and i love him for that.

MAMMON — the fact mammon was with us since the beginning is a big part of this place (but not the only one). and yeaaah, i know he was a little bitch about looking after mc and i was also blinded by my prejudice against personality based characters like him (narcissist, arrogant, show off) but then we get to know him better. mammon has so much more sides of his personality than that. (besides being a tsun tsun) so by that scene when we were competing against levi and lucifer saved us because mammon couldn’t make it in time, mammon was like “next time I will be the one saving you!!” i was already “YES YOU IDIOT I LOVE YOU TOO” and it was just downhill from there.

SATAN — honestly? he’s my type. the intellectual one, cat lover, fan of mystery and detective books and all that shit made me fall for him, hard. and then i saw his backstory and i fell for him EVEN HARDER. he has sooo much i want to know about! behind the facade he wears constantly in front of everyone there was so much more than the sin he’s avatar of. his arc was one of the lessons i loved the most, without doubt. though i wished the devs had gone deeper into his character, like uhhh i don’t know how to elaborate on this, but i feel we scratched only the surface of who satan really is. (besides that, satan def would be a beast in bed and my hcs about that does’t end)

LEVIATHAN — ahh it was too difficult to choose between him and beel. but i relate to levi quite a lot — animes, self depreciation, manga and all that stuff. he striked me as someone i wouldn’t like so much at the beginning but i’ve grown to love him. that was because of... well, i know envy is the deadly sin he’s avatar of, but man it’s annoying sometimes dnbfxk however! i love him either way. i just think that he should appreciate more things in life instead instead of putting himself down but who i am to talk? i used to be like that and i still am, just not as much. that must be most of the reasons of why i want to be by his side and reassure him that not everything in life is unfair, but can also be a way to make ourselves stronger. taking that emotional shit aside, i love his fanboy side!! i rant a lot about the things i like, especially animes and mangas, and seeing him so enthusiastic about things like that makes me feel like with him, i would act like myself the most.

BEELZEBUB — i love himbo!!! the giant, strong one that looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll? yes, sign me the fuck in. he’s the sOFTEST i swear to god almost all the scenes that made my heart explode with love was with him. when he asked to hold your hand while sleeping because he’s afraid of having any more nightmares about lilith and belphie and their fall from the celestial realm made my heart go BOOM. i would do ANYTHING for this boy 😭😭 beel was first i warmed up to in the game! i was gonna put him in the fourth place with levi but it would be too long.

LUCIFER — hhh this guys right here. ngl i was intimidated as fuck at first. but then i saw how he was family driven, always putting their safety and well being first and overall just being a loving brother, tho very discretely. and bruh characters like that are my DEATH??? he is so soft for the ones he loves and would do anything in his power to make them be safe and sound, even if it takes some sacrifices. i was touched by his past, how he had to hide so much from his brothers because he felt he should carry his burden alone. i especially love when lucifer tears off that prideful and powerful facade and shows that he’s capable of loving and being vulnerable and just idk man it just hits home im gonna cry

ASMODEUS — baby boy. lusty boy. ntt solmare did him dirty. he deserves SO MUCH MORE!! asmo has so much potential to be a favorite if only they had developed him better. that arc of his when we make a pact with him was lacking, in my opinion. the devs could have gone deeper into his character, showing that his not just a personification of lust, only its avatar. i’m sure there are different sides to his personality, you know? we’ve been seeing hints throughout the story and devilgrams (most of the time they’re very subtle!!) that asmo needs or/and constantly wants to feel loved, wanted, desired and/or admired. that could be a trauma or something of the sort that was created after his fall from the celestial realm. however this theory of mine is not full developed yet so i can’t really tell you guys about it in more detail. i still love him nevertheless!!

others characters:

SOLOMON — he is shady. and powerful. i love that. besides that, i think i may have a thing for white haired characters. but really, i love this guy, don’t know how but i do. there’s a lot i wanna know about him, and i feel he’s hiding or planning something big. and maybe evil. but ngl his interactions with asmo are the best!!

SIMEON — ara ara baby. i’m 100% in love with him. simeon is someone really good to have as a favorite honestly. even if he doesn’t get much screentime, anyone would realize that ever since the beginning he’s a very truthful person, with calming and chill vibes. i don’t know how to explain it well but with all the shit the brothers make mc go through, it wouldn’t be a surprise if you find yourself overwhelmed, and simeon is exactly the kind of person that makes you feel heard and seen; his atmosphere has this effect of making people feel at ease.... cough cough anyways a little bit nsfw but to me he’s either really kinky (without noticing or even knowing anything about kinks) or super innocent. that’s pretty much why i’ve seen this 50/50 aspect appearing constantly with his stans. p.s: not to be lewd but i wanna hold his hand 😳

LUKE — he’s my baby brother. i adopted him.

DIAVOLO — there’s so much of this guy we haven’t seen yet!! i know he’s like a cool dad and all but bruh, he’s the next demon king!! he must be a excelent strategist and is more powerful and intelligent than he lets on. i saw so many theories about diavolo, but my favorite so far is the one where diavolo kinda caused the celestial war indirectly. he’s another character that i feel we’ve only scratched the surface.

BARBATOS — everything about him screams “SUSPICIOUS”, he just hides it better than solomon. ngl i was rly curious about him and his powers and then i discovered he has control over TIME?? that’s too overpower!! but damn, i do love characters with time control powers...(victor from mlqc im looking at you) sometimes he looks like a dead fish. sometimes he looks hot. i don’t know bruh i’m half scared and half aroused by this guy.

that’s pretty much it i think? lmao there’s so much more i wanna say about them but this is all that comes to my mind right now!

[ladylillianrose]

Damn right you should be embarrassed Selin! Walking out that door was the smartest thing you've done!

Thank god she finally knows the truth!

As much as it hurts him that she's in pain and furious with him, she's right.

He knew telling her the truth would lead to something like this. 😢😢

Go Eda, go after the man responsible for this mess!

*side note* Damn that is a 🔥🔥🥵🥵 jacket (I have a weakness for men in jackets) and the jeans 🥵🥵🥵🔥🔥🔥 Don't get me wrong I love the suits, but mmmm there is just something about a well fitting pair of jeans!

Damn straight he isn't responsible for his father's actions! Make him see that Aydan!

Ugh it hurts Serkan so much to see her in this much pain 😢😢😢

He doesn't deserve forgiveness Eda, don't try and ease Alptekin's guilt.

Ugh the thunder and rain as both their hearts break, perfection!

Yes girl time is exactly what Eda needs, she needs the support and love from them.❤❤

Lmao at Fifi being Ayfer's favorite and Melo being offended🤣🤣

Aydan speaking the truth, and being supportive of both Serkan and Eda 😭😭🥰🥰

Serkan is not pulling his punches with Alptekin and I am 100% here for it!

Yaaaas Serkan finally laying into Selin too!! OMG I literally gasped when he told her they are not friends! *standing ovation* It took him long enough but he finally said what needed to be said all along to her!

Of course Seyfi is on Eda's side, he's always been.

I love that despite all their issues Aydan and Ayder are friends, they're hilarious together and they're good for each other.

Melo still wanting Eda and Serkan together and believing in true love🥰🥰😭😭

The fact that Alptekin just gives up so easily and walks out the door proves he is not worthy of Aydan or Serkan!🤬🤬🤬🤬

The fact that Serkan sleeps on the opposite side, because Eda sleeps on the right side. 😭😭😭

Poor Serkan, a week long inside being depressed 😭😭😭

Random Selin haircare commercial 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Bless Leila's heart she's so loyal to Serkan, I love her!!!

WTF Selin? You don't want him to be happy while you're unhappy? Was he not fucking clear enough? He doesn't want you, he has never wanted you, and your behavior has made it impossible to even be friends.🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 You've now officially entered psycho ex territory.

Even Piril is wary of what you are saying!

If it didnt work with you it shouldn't work with Eda? Narcissistic bitch!Serkan and Eda are going to need file some restraining orders!

Seyfi and Aydan are all of us fans 🤣🤣🤣

Lmao Piril and Engin need some popcorn if they're going to watch the Eda/Serkan meeting.

Ugh the way he looks at her🥺🥺🥺🥺

The fact that he signs it without reading it because he trusts and loves her so!😭😭😭😭

Making him take off the ring that he hasn't taken off since the engagement😭😭😭😭😭 Very cruel Eda.

She's going to trust and like you even less Efe since you're setting her up for a meeting with her grandmother....🤬🤬🤬

I love Leila and Serkan's relationship!🥰🥰

Don't get any ideas Selin, they are only temporarily off their fingers!

Are you fucking kidding me Selin? Way to burn all your bridges and show your true colors🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Lmao at Engin and Piril's reaction to Serkan signing Eda's contract without reading it!🤣🤣🤣🤣

Those rings are going to constantly be in his pocket🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭

Oh Serkan, don't worry your mom will do everything short of locking you two in a closet (because of Eda's claustrophobia) to make sure you end up together!

I'm curious as to what Eda's punishments for Serkan are😉😉😉😈😈😈

Damn Ferit's aunt just won some points for that take down of Selin

Seyfi and Melo spilling the tea! Give us more of them together!!😍😍😍

Serkan sweetie you are too obvious with your ploys!🤣🤣

Lmao Leila trying to be sneaky by putting the paperclip on the wrong side as a way to signal and talk to Serkan 🤣🤣🤣 007 she is not, but I love her!

"The whole situation is here now"🤣🤣🤣🤣 Their whole interaction is gold!

Lmao Engin no one ever wants Erdem 🤣🤣

I don't know how much more of Selin I can take!🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Omg Serkan slipping her ring into her pocket 🥺🥺🥺🥺😍😍😍😍

The look on his face when he asks what happens if he intentionally violates the contract🥵🥵🥵🥵🔥🔥🔥🔥 That smirk *swoons*, he's already thinking of the best ways to tease her!

And Eda can tell because of that slight hitch in her breath

I knew he'd have to apologize to Erdem 🤣🤣🤣

Eda looking like she just got the world's best gift!🤣🤣🤣

Serkan's face, throughout this whole scene 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I almost woke my husband up laughing. I'm crying! His hand during the hug 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I love Eda's idea for the school desks ❤❤❤

And as always Serkan is in awe and impressed by Eda🥺🥺🥺🥺

Not so unaffected by him are you Eda?

Melo working for Engin🥰🥰🥰🥰 Yes let's get all of the pro EdSer people together!!

Selin deserves to be miserable🤬🤬🤬🤬

Whenever he scoops her up *swoon*🔥🔥🔥

Serkan always wants to take her to the doctor because he cares so much, and even Eda knows.

"You were always there for me. This time I'll be there for you."😭😭😭🥺th🥺🥺

I'm so glad Ayfer has Fifi to help her with the business stuff.

Ferit you messed up, not as bad as Selin but still pretty bad.

Eda needed to have that moment and I'm glad she did, hopefully it helps her heal.

Serkan desperately wanting to hold her while she cries, and Eda wanting him to hold her.

Oh Ayfer you don't know how much worse these women are than Aydan.

Oh Ferit, you are helping for the right reason, but also hoping that Ceren will hear about it.

Um Selin your job is literally to do PR, which is all about image!!

Lmao Leila saying she would definitely leave Erdem if he got fired and had no money.🤣🤣🤣

Fifi watching the video of Eda and Serkan and even she can't deny how much he loves her.

Eda finding the ring and smiling❤❤❤

Seyfi assuring Aydan that she has him at least🥰🥰

No Selin you won't do anything, big difference!

Ayfer is so happy to be cooking, doing something she loves!🥰🥰

Yaaass Sirius is there to see his Mama!!!

Ugh he just loves and cares about her so much😭😭😭😭

Go meet them in the park Eda! Do not let your 4 legged son down!!

Oh Efe you are going to be the next to face Eda's wrath!

Serkan always giving Eda rides, because he wants to make sure she is safe.

Fuck you Alptekin, as if we needed more reasons to hate you.🤬🤬🤬

Lmao Fifi and Ferit's interaction.

"There is nothing that I would not do for you,"😭😭😭😭😍😍😍😍🥺🥺🥺

Serkan is not sorry to see you go Efe and neither am I!

Serkan watching and being so proud of Eda during her speech, and giving him hope🥺🥺🥺

That look in the mirror🥰🥰🥰

The passing of the ring 🤣, this will continue until it's back on her finger, where it belongs!

At least Ferit knows he messed up.

Melo refusing to give in to Ayfer's hypnotism 🤣🤣🤣

You know Melo is right Ceren! Ferit messed up, and much like Serkan he is trying to make up for his mistakes!

Oh Eda don't write it now, Ayfer will show up and make a scene!!

You know he is right Eda! You shouldn't be so rithless.

So many Pride and Prejudice parallels with Serkan and Ferit doing it only for the women they love.

Aydan knowing Serkan can't say no to Eda🤣🤣🤣

Uh Eda you need to come up with the $$$ and fast!!🤣🤣

Seyfi you've been working for Aydan for so long that you still question her schemes?

Yaaas Serkan with the grand scheme!! You know you need to go to dinner with him!!

At least we know where Serkan gets his subtlety from 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Tell me Serkan is going to also buy this dress because it is only worthy of Eda!!

You will stumble and fall if Serkan looks you in the eyes?😍😍😍😍

Of course he'll be there to catch you, he always does😭😭😭😭😭

The fact that Piril thinks Selin is being ridiculous says something.

You don't think you deserve Eda's scorn Selin? Are you really that stupid?🙄🙄🤬🤬

Damn Fifi and Melo🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Engine's face when he sees Piril😍😍😍😍😍

Oooooo Ferit you know you're gone!

Serkan can't breathe watching Eda🔥🔥🔥😍😍😍😍😍

Seriously Selin? I'm so beyond done with this crazy woman!!🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Do more stuff like this then Serkan, its good for you and everyone ekse.

Just drive her to the restaurant with you, that will guarantee that she is there with you!

I'm going to murder Selin because you know Eda wants to go!!🤬🤬🤬

Aydan showing no mercy to Alptekin! He deserves every inch of her scorn!🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Nooooooo!!!! Of course she goes to the one Selin put in the envelope!!😭😭😭😭🤬🤬🤬🤬

They had better talk to one another about this misunderstanding!!!!

Call him!!! He would never stand you up Eda!!!!😢😢😢😢😢

Ugh my heart hurts for them!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Throw some water on Selin and see if she melts that witch!!

[taylorinthetardis]

Only Human - Chapter 2

Alright! Here’s the second chapter for Only Human. The gang go clubbing! Will is extra weird! You guys get a glimpse at my basic ass taste in music! Hooray!

The songs I had in mind for this chapter are:

Good as Hell by Lizzo (playing when they walk in) YOUTH by Troye Sivan (playing when they go downstairs) False God by Taylor Swift (plays when Darcy watches Lizzie dance) Only Human by Jonas Brothers (plays when Lizzie tries to get Darcy to dance)

Again I’d like to thank my good friend @madbaddic7ed for her encouragement and for convincing me to cross post this story.

I hope you all like this chapter. Please feel free to leave feedback and if you want to be added to a taglist for when I finally update, please let me know!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22109365

Only Human

Summary:  The events of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice as seen through the eyes of Darcy. Story takes place in modern day London. Lizzy and Jane are American students studying abroad. Their sisters take turns visiting them throughout the story. Bingley and Darcy are recent business partners, but longtime friends. Caroline is as snake-ish as ever. George Wickham is an actual rapist - the rape will not be described in detail.

Pairing: William (Will) Darcy x Elizabeth (Lizzie) Bennet; Charles Bingley x Jane Bennet

Rating: Explicit due to eventual smut

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, some dirty thoughts

Word Count: 3.5K

                                                  Chapter 2: Lock 17

The five of us piled into the back of the cab. Charles and Jane took the two seats facing the back of the cab, leaving myself to sit on the bench seat between Lizzie and Caroline. Lizzie stretched her legs out across the back of the cab. The lights of London illuminated the back of the cab and I got a good look at her combat boots. Caroline did as well.

“Do you see her boots? That’s at least six inches of mud!” She wrinkled her nose in disgust like Lizzie had dog shit on her shoes. It definitely isn’t. But I mean yeah, they’re muddy, she basically lives in a park, what’d you expect?

“I am sitting right here. They aren’t that muddy and they aren’t on your feet so, why do you care?” Jesus Christ, I love her. Lizzie shot a look across the cab to her sister. Jane returned it with one that clearly said “Be nice”. Why should she be if Caroline is going to be a cunt?

“Caroline, be nice.” Is that all you have to offer here Charles? Thankfully, the rest of cab ride passed mostly in silence, with Jane and Lizzie occasionally chiming in with remarks about the area. Having been in the city for nearly two months, they had gotten to know the area surrounding Regent’s quite well it seemed. Blessedly, it was a short ride from Charles’ house to Lock 17, traffic not being nearly as unbearable at eight on a Thursday night. I couldn’t get out of the cab fast enough once it stopped. The brisk autumn air was a welcome cure for the nausea brought on by my nervousness from my proximity to Lizzie and the overwhelming stench of Caroline’s perfume. Once everyone had disembarked, we began the short, uphill trek to the bar. Caroline slipped her arm through mine and snuggled into my arm.

“Will, I’m cold.” She whined. Whose fucking fault is that Caroline? I didn’t pick out your stupid outfit. It’s autumn, in London. We’re by water. What the fuck did you expect?

“Guess you should have worn something a little more sensible.” I replied, struggling in vain to extricate myself from her grip. The more I struggled, the tighter her grip got, like Devil’s Snare. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the smirk come back to Lizzie’s face. Well I’m glad I can provide her with some entertainment. There was barely a queue when we got to the door. The step up into the building caught Caroline off guard and I was able to slip out of her grasp. The main floor was not as packed with people as I feared it would be. Everyone is probably downstairs dancing. Pop music was filtering up from the basement area. I didn’t recognize the song but Caroline did because she went immediately down the stairs. Oh, thank fuck for that. The four of us that remained worked our way through the small crowd to the bar. Charles had his wallet out before we even got up to order. I got my usual Old Fashioned, a double though, since I was definitely going to need the sweet relief alcohol provided my anxiety. Lizzie ordered Rum Punch for herself and Jane. Charles got a Screwdriver and four shots of tequila. He knows I hate tequila. He does this every time we go out. Judging by the look on Lizzie’s face, she wasn’t too thrilled with the prospect of needing to throw back that vile shit either. The bartender set the shots down on the counter. Charles passed them out, then raised his glass.

“To new friends!” We clinked our shot glasses and threw them back. I shuddered. Jane and Lizzie looked like they wanted to spit it right back out. Charles took his like a champ, like he always does. We set our glasses back down on the counter and the bartender asked if we wanted another round. Jane, Lizzie, and I politely declined. We grabbed our drinks from the bar and Charles immediately led Jane to a nearby table, leaving myself and Lizzie behind. Lizzie was looking around, taking it all in.

“This place seems like kind of a hole in the wall. How did it catch the attention of two wealthy businessmen? I’d have figured this wasn’t really your scene.” Oh, God is she talking to me? Why is she talking to me? C’mon Will you know how to do this. You talked to girls all the time at uni. Oh, no I took too long, she’s walking over to her sister. Should I follow her? Yeah, idiot, otherwise you’d just be standing at the bar like a numpty. Why am I so bad at this? When I made it to the table, she was asking Charles the same question she just asked me. I took the seat on the left of Charles; Jane was seated on his right. I stared into my drink while Charles told her the story of the last time we had been sat in this bar.

“… so, we left the concert at The Underworld, it’s this rock club not too far from here, but Darce wasn’t ready to go home, so we walked around Camden for a bit until we found this place. We had been to Lockside, the restaurant just a little further down the canal, for a business lunch before, but we hadn’t been over this way at night since we were in uni. I had no clue this place even existed until we saw the queue.” Charles is so good at talking. Why can’t I be more like him?  He went back to asking Jane questions about America, while Lizzie and I sat in relative silence, Lizzie chiming in every now and then to back up something Jane had said. I finished my drink and went back to the bar to get another. I was definitely going to need it if I was ever going to make an attempt at conversation with Lizzie. I stayed at the bar to drink my second and my third drinks. I was about to order a fourth, when Charles appeared at my side.

“For God’s sake Darce, what is wrong with you? I know you weren’t exactly thrilled to come out with me tonight but I didn’t think you’d be this broody. I was hoping you and Lizzie might hit it off. You’re quite similar you know. You’d see it if you made the effort to chat with her.” What do you think all this alcohol is for Charles? I’m doing my best, my dude. Ooh, my dude? I think imma tiny bit drunk. “I’m getting us another round and then we’re gonna go downstairs. And when I say we I mean you too. You used to be so fun at uni. I know you still have it in you, I think maybe you just need a little nudge to find it again.” I don’t know Charlie boy; I don’t think it’s gonna be that easy. He clapped me on the back and grabbed his and Jane’s drinks from the bar and went back to the table, leaving me with Lizzie’s drink and my own. Oh, that’s very clever Chuck, leave me with her drink so I have to interact… Suddenly Lizzie appeared at my side, taking up the space Charles had just vacated, swiping her drink from the bar. I must have looked visibly startled because she gave me that look again, the eyebrow and the smirk. She took a large sip of it and strutted away from the counter. My body seemed to move of its own accord, grabbing my drink and moving my legs to follow her. She led the way down the stairs while I brought up the rear. I didn’t know the song that was playing, but Lizzie seemed pretty excited about it. She grabbed Jane by the wrist, pulling her towards the dance floor. Charles trailed after the sisters like a puppy dog. Thankfully, the downstairs also had a bar, so I posted up on a barstool to work on my drink, ordering another one before long. I couldn’t see any familiar faces in the crowded dance floor; no Charles, no Caroline, blessedly, but, unfortunately, no Lizzie. I bet she’s a good dancer. She looks like she’d be a good dancer. I wish I could see the way she moves. I wish I wasn’t so damn awkward. I hope no one tries to dance with her. I don’t want anyone else touching her. Wow, four whole drinks plus one shot in – yeah, I was definitely drunk. How else could you explain me thinking about her like that? Like she already was mine. I nursed my current drink more than I had the previous ones. I decided to get up and walk the perimeter of the dance floor. Several songs went by before I caught a glimpse of her again. She was moving slow, in time with the beat. She was alone, but I could see Charles and Jane a little further in the crowd. None of them had their drinks anymore. They must have dropped them at the bar after I got up. Lizzie clearly knew the song that was playing; she was saying the words along with it. I could read her lips from my vantage point. We might just get away with it, religion’s in your lips, even if it’s a false god, we’d still worship, she threw her head back and ran her hand through her hair, continuing to sway her hips to the beat. The lights hit her and her hair reflected it, causing it to look even redder in light. Probably about the same shade as my face. She can’t look over here. She can’t catch me watching her. God, she’s so beautiful. A few more people moved away from the crowd and I got a full view of Charles and Jane. He was holding her close while they swayed to the beat, his arms around her waist. He whispered something in her ear and she smiled. Lizzie continued to dance. Several men moved around her, but no one tried to dance with her. How strange. She’s easily one of the most beautiful women in here. Can they not see it? Do they not see her? How could they ignore her like that when I can’t take my eyes off of her? Can’t they see how stunning she is? I continued to watch her move, imagining what I would do if I had the confidence to join her. What would it feel like to hold her close, like Charles is holding Jane? Would she let me? What if I couldn’t keep up with her? Would she taunt me? Or, would she help me? Would she guide my hips with hers? I could hide my face in her soft hair, pretend there was no one else here, just feel the curve of her arse as it moved against my cock. Oh okay, that train of thought needs to end. I cleared my throat and looked around, as if to double check that no one had heard that thought. I was so lost in my own fantasy that I hadn’t noticed Lizzie had vanished from my sight again, or that the song had changed. Charles, however, had taken notice of my new position and made his way towards me. Jane was no longer with Charles as he strode over. I looked around the room and caught a glimpse of red and blonde hair standing at the bar. They must have decided to get another drink.

“God, Darcy, I think I’m in love! Jane really is the most wonderful woman I’ve ever met!”

“That’s great Charles, I’m very happy for you. Don’t ask me for help picking out the engagement ring though, I don’t know a thing about jewellery.”

“Ha-ha very funny, but I’m serious Darce. I really like her. I’m really hoping that this is gonna be the one that’s lasts. I know its still early days but I just have a good feeling about it. I hope someday you’ll understand; feel how I’m feeling, you know? I think you might really be missing your chance here with Lizzie. I get that interacting with people makes you anxious sometimes, but I really think you should make the effort here. She could be really good for you. Just pull yourself out of your own head for once; have some fun!” Yeah, sure I’ll get out of my head Charles. Do you want me to go ahead and sort out Brexit too while you’re requesting the impossible?

“Charles, just because lightning strikes often for you doesn’t mean it’ll ever strike for me. And I’m okay with that. Don’t worry about me, I’m fine. Just enjoy your date, have fun. I’m alright on my own.” Good job Will, that should hold him over. Then maybe he’ll take the hint and stop forcing me to interact with Lizzie. I need to do it at my own pace.

“You’re right, Jane is absolutely incredible. But Lizzie’s very beautiful as well, you have to admit that.” No, I absolutely do not Charles. I shan’t and you can’t make me.

“I just hate seeing you looking so gloomy all the time. Lizzie’s fun and she’s very pretty. She’s got great energy. And she’s so smart. I really think if you just—”

“I get it Charles, but I’m sorry. I just don’t think it’ll work with Lizzie. She’s just, I don’t know, she’s too—," Gorgeous, intelligent, absolutely perfect for me in every single way, “I don’t know Charles, she just doesn’t do it for me, you know? She’s just not pretty enough to tempt me. She’s too soft, you know, in the belly.” What. The. Fuck. William. Patrick. Fitzgerald. Darcy. Why did I just say that? I just called her fat. Why did I say that? I didn’t mean that.

“Will, that’s really unkind of you to say. I think maybe you’ve been spending too much time around my sister.” I sure as hell hope not, but fuck if you’re not wrong. He started to walk away from me. I moved to follow until I realized he was walking towards Jane and Lizzie, who were standing about six feet away, each with two drinks in their hands. I recognized the one in Lizzie’s left hand as an Old Fashioned. My Old Fashioned. She bought me a fresh drink and I more or less insulted her to her face. There’s no way she didn’t hear me. This is why I hate clubs, they’re too loud. I have to yell to carry on a conversation. God, if you’re up there, I wish the ground to open up and deposit me straight into Hell where I belong, please and thank you. I walked towards them slowly. Lizzie stuck her left hand out for me to take my drink from her.

“I got you a fresh one. Seemed like you’d been working on that one for a long time. The ice’s all melted.” I downed the rest of the glass I had previously been working on. She was right, it was watery. She must have been keeping as close an eye on me as I had been on her. Strange.

“Thank you.” I took the new drink from her. She turned and walked away, heading back towards the bar area where it appeared Charles and Jane had gone to sit down. I followed, taking long draughts from the glass Lizzie had handed me. It was nearly empty by the time I reached them. I set my empty glass down on the bar, knowing all too well that my current drink would be joining it soon. But for the time being at least, I had something to occupy my mouth. Maybe that’ll keep me from saying something else stupid or insensitive.

“What have you been up to all night Will? Have you been out dancing? I feel like we’ve barely seen you all night.” Jane asked when I caught up to them.

“Darcy’s not a huge fan of nightclubs. He doesn’t like pop music. Or dancing. At least, not anymore. He only goes to them if I drag him, kicking and screaming. He didn’t always used to be such a wallflower, if you can believe it. He could really tear up the dance floor when we were at uni, right Darce?” He laughed. Drunk Charles really doesn’t know how to keep things to himself.

“I can’t even picture that. This guy doing the cupid shuffle at a college party? No way!” Have I really made such a terrible impression on her? I mean yeah, I guess I have. Lizzie laughed along with Charles. I deserved that. I deserved that. I deserved that.

“He sure could! But not anymore. He’s a serious businessman now and he only does serious businessman things. Like make spreadsheets and flow charts.” Alright the jokes can stop now Charles. He knows damn well why I don’t feel comfortable letting loose anymore. He knows what happened last time. The bartender called Last Call and the DJ put on the last song of the night.

“Oh, excellent! Last song of the night and it’s Jonas Brothers. Well I’m going back out for one last dance. Whadiya say Will? You wanna come with, show us all those dance moves Charles says you’re hiding?” She leant over, getting much closer to me than I was prepared for, eyebrow cocked again. “Or am I not pretty enough to tempt you?” She whispered it right into my ear. I shivered. She didn’t give me time to respond – she already knew the answer. She smirked at me and walked back to the dance floor. Follow her! C’mon legs, move! Charles and Jane went out after her, leaving me alone again. I downed the rest of my drink and settled up the tab Charles had started upstairs. I scheduled the cab to pick us up in five minutes and realized we’d have to track down Caroline. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I ground the heels of my hands into my eyes. When I took my hands away, Caroline had appeared at my side. Well, speak of the Devil and she shall appear. God, when I said I wanted to go to Hell, this isn’t quite what I had in mind. She leant against the bar, looking out at the dance floor, at her brother and Jane as they danced with Lizzie.

“We’re going to have to do something about that, Will.” Excuse me? What is this ‘we’ business? “Charles falls in love too easily. Jane seems sweet enough, but I don’t know about that sister of hers. I wouldn’t put it past her to involve her sister in some scheme. Try to get Charles to part with some of our money. Americans, they’re all so greedy.” That’s rich coming from you Caroline, seeing as you’ve been after my money since you were eleven fucking years old. However, I had to admit that she wasn’t completely wrong. Charles does fall in love too easily. It’s honestly been a miracle that I haven’t had to force a gold digger out of his life yet. I don’t get those kinds of vibes from either Bennet sister, but I’ve been wrong about people before, horribly wrong, and it cost me dearly. I decided I ought to keep an eye on them, for Charles’ sake, just in case. He’d been in so many relationships in the seven years I’d known him. Maybe Jane will be different, but maybe she won’t. The song ended and the lights came up. Jane, Lizzie, and Charles made their way back to where myself and Caroline were waiting at the bar. We followed the crowd up the stairs and out of the club. The cab arrived a couple minutes later and we got in the same way we had earlier. The nausea returned, but now I wasn’t sure if it was the anxiety, Caroline and her perfume, or the copious amounts of alcohol I had consumed. A combination of all three, I expect. The cab took Charles and the girls back to Hanover Terrace first. I didn’t get out. Charles clapped me on the side of my arm as he got out, knowing I knew what he meant by it: we’ll talk tomorrow. As we pulled away, I looked out the rear windscreen. Charles kissed Jane goodnight and hugged Lizzie before following his sister into the house. The Bennet sisters walked arm in arm back towards the park. I felt a pang of jealousy towards my best friend, at the ease with which he interacted with Lizzie while I couldn’t even open my mouth without insulting her. It took about fifteen minutes to get me home to Belgravia. I kicked my trainers off by the door and stumbled up the stairs, reliving every horrible moment of the night in my head with each stair I climbed. I got myself a glass of water and two paracetamol and set them on my bedside table. I collapsed on my bed and reached out to pull the wastebasket closer, just in case. I closed my eyes, but in the darkness, I saw her face. I covered my head with my pillow, but in the silence, I heard her whisper. I slept fitfully.

[psychecoffee]

Reintroduction

I’ve been quite inactive the last year admittedly, and some things have changed, so I feel I should reintroduce myself.

I’m Lonnie, gender is a social construct, and I’m going to be studying Mental Health Nursing at University this September. So I might become a bit of a studyblr to get my adhd ass into gear. Or I might become a bit of a ghost again ;;

I’m currently a rather unproductive writerblr, which in part was not my fault since my iPad decided to hide all my wips for 4 damned months. Seriously I cried when I could redownload my wips again, which my mum found to be quite a funny sight.

My wips are:

Dager, which I feel is like my unruly child which won’t let me concentrate on it when I am in front of my damn iPad or any writing utensil. Within this universe I am writing a sort of prequel currently entitled ‘The Sound’ which is supposed to be a metaphor for the sound of mourning and how grief leaves an echo. I feel that theme is so prevalent within Dager and TS that I have to admit that they have the same feeling, and even if both the main characters have experienced it in different ways, the feel of it is the same. These are my most psychological intensive books, so it’s taking me a bit longer to write them. It is safe to say these are not YA novels, and are at the core crime novels.

Rerum (the Aenir Prophesies) which include three books (including a very important prequel) that scream at me from all ends before I can even begin completing chapter six of the first book!! The first two books focuses on a prominent group of individuals in the mist of a ‘plague’ (referred to as a ‘misery’), and the deep desire to destroy the group who created it. It is full of deceit and secrets, and the small loneliness that draws the group together. The prequel focuses on the Heir of Aenir, whom is glanced upon in the original books, and is based about a decade after them, and deeply focuses on the Heir trying to prove herself capable of her title.

And Death Defies Zir, which is an anthology of stories from the afterlife, and the organisation that helps run it. Honestly half of them are emotionally exasperated or repressed assholes. Green Light is another small wip, based on a sweet lesbian giant of a women going through her first heartbreak, trying to find her footing in the world of medicine while trying to discover her passion in life. Honestly I turn to GL whenever I’m feeling particularly sad or uncertain, which I do feel reflects quite well on the feelings on the POV.

I’ve decided to put ‘Dager’ on hold for a bit, as I feel somewhat inexperienced to truly write Maeve’s and Christians story, with how psychologically rich it is. While I say that I am still writing TS, which by extension means I’m still getting the foundations up for both the novels. They both involve the same killer, however that individual is never the frontline of either novels. Instead both novels focus on the emotional chaos that is left in the wake.

Books I love include: Howls Moving Castle (Sophie and Howls relationship is base line chaotic and I live for it), Jane Eyre (because I’m a simple soul that loves independent women and wild fools like Rochester), Pride and Prejudice- really anything by Jane Auster (its the FOOLS I tell you!!), The Great Gatsby (because be bi and do crime- also I am an absolute mad lad for unreliable narrators), the Lincoln Rhyme books (I never have gotten over how stella Denzel Washington and Jolie were in the movies), and anything by Maria V. Snyder, Trudi Canavan and Cassandra Claire. Seriously I go especially feral if Maria V. Snyder’s Poison Study is mentioned because uGH intelligent FOOOOOLS 💕👌🏻

I also play interactive fiction such as: The Wayhaven Chronicles (and it is not an understatement when I say I am a FOOL for them!!), Breach: The Archangel Job (ugh gosh my heart and mind and ugh everything about this game is fantastic and intellectually gratifying), and The Soul Stone War (I am feral for all the characters, I would simply die for them- they’re all so damn loveable and funny, but if anyone simply touched my Mare I would surely deck them).

Random rubbish about me: I’m chaotic good (which explains a lot), I love coffee and herbal tea and hot chocolate, don’t ask me which is my favourite it changes all the time, I love cats an insane amount, I love horror films and binge watching series (currently binging Grey’s Anatomy and Criminal Minds- both for the first time), and I absolutely cannot watch or read anything sad. I’d say I was passive aggressive but I’m too passive to be aggressive haha. I am a simple chaotic creature.

[formashimataichi]

I'm a Taichihaya fan and all the other Taichihaya fans I've spoken to think there may be a chance (only Suetsugu knows how remote) that Chihaya might return Taichi's feelings, as there are a few hints that could be read that way. Wanting Chihaya to have changed her mind/heart isn't "nice guy projecting" any more than wanting Lizzie to have changed her mind/heart about Darcy after she rejected him is. I just want both Chihaya and Taichi to be happy and I don't think it's an impossibility.

I don’t think these two relationships are even comparable, though? Pride and Prejudice’s dilemma is centered in two characters holding false assumptions of each other’s character, so the desire for Lizzy to have changed her mind about Darcy is rooted in her reforming her initial, premature opinions of him and letting go of her pride in order to do that. 

And I should clarify: I don’t think it’s at all impossible for either of the main ships to end up canon. I wouldn’t even mind it, per se. But at least around these two specifically, my issue lies primarily in the language that’s surrounded their relationship for several years. There’s usually a very big stress on all of the things that Taichi did for her sake, that he didn’t have to do them and that Chihaya would be nowhere without him, that he’s suffered so much because of her and it would make no sense to leave him “suffering” up until the end, etc., etc. And I honestly hate that. A big part of Taichi’s arc is him having to come to terms with the fact that he needs to do and pursue things for his own sake. He can’t survive if his entire investment in karuta is based in hopes of reciprocated feelings from Chihaya. His happiness has to be his own, and I don’t think readers realize the implications they’re making when they say the way for him to be happy is for him to be with Chihaya, because you can’t vest all of your self-fulfillment in being in a relationship with another person. Like I said in this ask, you have to belong to yourself first. That’s precisely what Chitose is trying to convey to him when they’re at the train station and she’s talking about owning her passion outside of the support Chihaya supplied to it. 

And on the flip side, with regards to Chihaya, I see so many people focus so exclusively on the matter of her ending up with either boy (not just Taichi), that there’s not as much conversation about her feelings, about her hopes and dreams. Like I said in the ask I answered before this one, these kids are only eighteen years old. They have their entire lives ahead of them. So while I don’t think it’s impossible for Chihaya to reciprocate either Taichi or Arata’s feelings, I find it hard to understand why anyone would think that doing so is a priority for her right now. Her focus is so clearly on karuta, on being Queen, and on mending or maintaining her friendships with the people who have supported her all this time (Taichi being inclusive of that, obviously). It just feels a bit silly to me to act like her happiness is also inherently going to be tied to her being in a relationship, when there’s much more to her character, her narrative arc, and her goals. Romance has never been a super huge priority for her, because she’s a karuta nut case first, and I simply wish people would stop reducing the series to its romantic conclusions when the story is about a lot more than that. I’m not saying that the romantic narrative should be disregarded entirely, of course; it’s one that I dearly love and that I think says a lot about the characters and how they grow (more about that here). But it’s one of many lens through which the series can be viewed, and it feels far too often like it’s the only lens through which many readers view the series, which can be frustrating. 

To clarify, though, obviously not every single shipper is going to act or think like this. I’m not projecting onto this readership as if it’s some monolith. The opinions I have are mostly just a reflection of what I’ve observed or interacted with at large in the last seven to eight years, and especially stem from the fact that I used to be one of these shippers. If you’ve been following my account long enough, you’ll know that I used to be a diehard fan of the ship and very adamantly believed in a lot of the interpretations that I’ve now since let go of. So this isn’t really coming from an “anti” perspective or anything, if that’s your concern, and I’m not trying to accuse you or your friends of being like this either. This is just a general observation, and you’re absolutely entitled to disagreeing with it! 

[elyvorg]

Consider the following scenario: Around chapter 3, Tenko comes to Kaito to ask him to help Himiko. How do you think things would turn out? -As in, do you think the two could become the motivational buddies of Shuichi, Maki and Himiko?- (Also you're literally the only person I can ask this to, and thank you for providing such detailed Kaito content)

Aww, you're welcome! I'm thrilled to be considered the go-to source for Good Kaito Thoughts. (Though this is going to be at least half Tenko and Himiko thoughts, of course, and I don't profess to be as much of an expert at that, but I'll do my best.)

(also whoops, this got long, probably should go under a cut)

First, this'd need a couple of prerequisites: that Kaito's phobia doesn't exist so he isn't non-functionally mentally ill for most of chapter 3, and that Tenko's degenerate males thing is toned down a touch such that she's willing to acknowledge that Kaito is a good person and ask for his help with relatively little hesitation.

(This is sort of like what happens canonically when Tenko gets desperate enough to stop Angie's ritual that she asks Maki and Shuichi for help, and would have included Kaito if he'd been feeling well. But in that case, it was definitely more about "Angie is dangerous and might cause a murder if we don't stop this", rather than being specifically about helping Himiko. And I also get the sense that if there hadn't been at least one girl involved then Tenko maybe still wouldn't have asked them.)

Would This Work?

So, if we assume that, A, Tenko was even more focused specifically on helping Himiko than she already was in canon, and, B, was willing to ignore her prejudices and swallow her pride enough to ask Kaito for help, (and C, Kaito wasn't mentally ill and was able to help), would Kaito's input have been enough?

The thing is, Tenko was pretty much already doing all the right things to try and help Himiko in the first place. She'd recognised that the problem was Himiko struggling to express her emotions and had been trying to encourage her to do so, including suggesting physical training. This is a lot like Kaito's type of approach! There isn't that much that Kaito would have done differently to how Tenko did it. Him lending his input to this would mostly just have resulted in doubling the amount of enthusiastic persistence directed at Himiko, which... since Tenko being such an overwhelming personality was probably part of why Himiko didn't respond to her for so long, that might actually make things slightly worse on its own.

That said, Tenko was also not helping things by having a lot of her interactions with Himiko be unnecessarily overzealous romantic come-ons, which just made Himiko less inclined to want to listen to her in general and meant Tenko had given herself more of an uphill battle when it came to her genuine selfless attempts to help. I'd think the best thing to do about this would be for Tenko to apologise for having sometimes made things about her and make it clear that the most important thing to her right now is helping Himiko and this isn't about Tenko at all. However, I'm not sure if this is an issue that Kaito would actually properly pick up on in order to suggest that Tenko do this.

See, when it comes to understanding what a potential sidekick's struggles are and the best ways to help them overcome them, Kaito is great at it and seems to put a lot of conscious thought into it - but that's the part Tenko was already perfectly good at, too. When it comes to the process of reaching out and offering that help in the first place to encourage someone to begin to change, however, Kaito appears to pretty much just instinctively wing it, with no particular game plan other than "be persistent" and, maybe a little more specifically, "invite them to training". So I don't know if he'd necessarily have any better ideas than Tenko herself had of how to go about this - except, of course, for inviting Himiko to training.

Kaito's whole training thing really is a very effective way of getting through to someone in the first place. While the exercise itself is only tangentially connected to the actual point of self-reflection and emotional growth (especially in Maki's case), it's the directness of Kaito's approach that makes all the difference, because it prevents the potential sidekick from failing to notice or pretending not to notice that he's trying to help them. Just the fact that Kaito makes it a whole Big Thing where he very directly says, "I want to help you, this is how I'm doing it, if you want to get stronger then all you gotta do to take the first step is do some push-ups with me" presents the potential sidekick with a very obvious choice to make over whether they want to face their issues and try to change. In that position, anyone who really does want to change deep down is almost certainly going to take him up on that, whether or not they've been brushing off his other, less "official" attempts to reach out and help.

So maybe Kaito inviting Himiko to training, with Tenko alongside him backing up what he's saying - or leading the speech, even - about how this is all to help her, would indeed have got through to her. There are hints that, towards the end of chapter 3's daily life, Tenko has begun to make Himiko quietly wish she was more willing and able to listen to Tenko's advice. So it appears that the initial desire to change was already there in Himiko - it just sadly took Tenko's death in canon for her to actually acknowledge it.

However, there's also the massive spanner of Angie in the works here. With Himiko being brainwashed into clinging to Angie's escapism as an unhealthy coping mechanism, she was getting a free ticket to take the easy way out of her problems and run away from feeling like she needed to really change. If there had been no Angie in canon, Tenko would probably have been able to get through to Himiko while she was alive without even needing to ask anyone for help. But with Angie being a factor, even if Tenko and Kaito combined forces and invited Himiko to training to very directly present her with the option to change, I really kind of think Himiko would have just refused. She'd have been able to tell herself she doesn't need to change when she's already got Angie and Atua.

Tenko would be dismayed, but I think Kaito would get it. His sidekick thing can only work on people who want to change. Kaito can nudge and persuade, but he can't force people to make that choice; they have to ultimately do it of their own volition. If Himiko really isn't ready for this, there's nothing else Kaito can do. So he'd probably end up advising Tenko to just be patient and keep an eye on Himiko, letting her know that she's still there for her and the offer's still open if she ever changes her mind.

...And then case 3 would happen and Angie and Tenko would die and Himiko's arc would proceed roughly as it did in canon anyway, bleagh. Except for the fact that Kaito would have a lot more personal investment in this, because even if she never quite became his sidekick before, the fact that he extended that offer would still be important to him. I doubt he'd want to just leave her now that she has made the choice to change, even if she doesn't specifically need his help for it any more, and so he'd probably invite her to training in chapter 4 after all, despite the painful lack of Tenko.

(While we're here, let's talk a little about why Kaito never actively tried to make Himiko his sidekick in canon. Presumably, during the first three chapters, it was mostly out of seeing that Tenko was already kind of trying to work on that herself, and then that plus the whole Angie thing meant that Kaito didn't think it would be a good idea to butt in when he'd only get in the way. Then the reason he never invited Himiko to training in chapter 4 when she'd lost Tenko was perhaps because Himiko didn't actually need any extra nudges like Shuichi and Maki did at the beginnings of chapters 2 and 3; she was already going full-throttle and had firmly begun to make her efforts to change. ...That and, by that point, Kaito must have been mentally exhausted just looking out for two sidekicks while also suffering from and hiding his own problems, so he probably didn't really want to increase his burdens even more. Not that he'd have ever admitted that.)

If This Worked

But hey, never mind the fact that my conclusion to the question of whether this'd work is "probably not, thanks a bunch Angie", let's also think about what would happen if this had somehow worked anyway. A five-person team of training buddies sounds pretty adorable, after all!

(...Well, for this to last for any appreciable amount of time, we'd need Kiyo to not up and murder Tenko like an asshole, please. I guess it's possible that if they'd already got through to Himiko before Angie's death, she wouldn't have felt the need to talk to Angie with the seance and Tenko wouldn't have died? I dunno; that might be something Himiko would still want to do for closure even if she was already expressing her emotions more healthily. Ugggh Kiyo sucks. The only meaningful purpose he serves in the story is because someone had to kill Angie and Tenko for the sake of Himiko's character development, so if Himiko's development was going to happen anyway without those deaths, can Kiyo just not be here at all, please? Please? Or be someone slightly less shitty who murders just to escape and therefore stops at Angie.)

But anyway, yes, this five-person training team is fun to think about, because Kaito and Tenko really have a lot in common and it's a shame Tenko's prejudices mean they never get to interact much in canon to show this off. They're both so very Good in terms of their general overzealous enthusiasm and determination and desire to protect people. Tenko is also surprisingly like Kaito in that, though she seemingly needs to literally Aikido throw someone to do it, she can be pretty good at reading people and picking up on their struggles (even - gasp! - if they're male).

That said, Tenko doesn't make a point of going out of her way to help anyone who needs it like Kaito does, not even just among the girls (she sees Maki as a threat at first), and it's only because of her massive crush on Himiko that she also gained a selfless desire to help her. Still, maybe her collaborating with Kaito on this could help her learn that she's actually really good at motivating people in this way and it feels rewarding even when the target isn't her crush, making her want to use her skills for this more in future!

(Imagine if, in an effort to understand her better and see why Kaito believes in her so much, Tenko politely asks if she can Aikido throw Maki to get a read on her. She'd be kind of wary about what Maki would do if she did it without warning, after all.)

Plus, Tenko is also a big advocate of the idea that physical training can help someone with mental problems, just like Kaito! She might even have a slightly better idea of an actual systematic approach to training than Kaito... but then again, maybe not, because her Neo-Aikido does seem pretty haphazard. So we'd probably end up with these two ridiculous dorks who have no idea how to run a targeted exercise regime just throwing their enthusiasm all over the place and probably bickering and being competitive while they were at it, and poor Shuichi, Maki and Himiko would just have to try and keep up with them somehow. That'd be... quite the spectacle. (Maki would wryly comment that it's like having two Kaitos when one was more than enough... but she wouldn't actually mind.)

Naturally, I also find it interesting to think about how Kaito would be affected by this, especially since, while Shuichi, Maki and Himiko would all be considered his sidekicks, Tenko would be something more like a "co-hero" alongside Kaito in this arrangement. There's a lot of potential inherent in the idea of Kaito forging an important relationship with someone who's not a sidekick to him. If a friend of Kaito’s who was in the position to properly view him as an equal was also emotionally mature enough to see what he's doing wrong and point out that he really needs to talk about his own problems too, that would Change Some Things. However, as much as she'd be doing her best to help, and even if we assume her gender prejudices just didn't get in the way here at all, I... don't think Tenko's that person.

(Can you tell this is something I've thought about quite a bit, albeit never with Tenko. Imagine if Kaede had lived and she and Kaito had teamed up in their mutual desire to support everyone - they'd also have been great influences on each other, stopping the other from getting too self-destructively selfless.)

(Though, hey, what if Tenko Aikido threw Kaito at some point, probably more out of boisterous competitiveness than trying to get a read on him, except then she suddenly realises, "wait a minute, you're sick, what are you doing training them when you should be looking after yourself?" And his sidekicks kind of can't help but agree with her despite his attempts to deny it, because Kaito definitely looks to be in more pain than he should be from that. And then they escape and save his life, like they always would have if they'd known. Man, if only.)

Also, even though Tenko is nominally someone else in the "hero" role here, I can't quite see Kaito's unreasonable standards for heroes kicking in towards her. This is just an instinctive sense I get that I'm not completely sure of the reason for - perhaps because of the way Tenko initiated this by asking him for help? So she kind of is like a sidekick to him, too - just a sidekick in the specific art of being an inspiring and encouraging hero. Man that'd be so confusingly not-black-and-white to Kaito, a lot like Shuichi is to him in this regard as well. What do you mean she's both at the same time??? That’s not how this works!!!

There's also the fact that Himiko would be a sidekick alongside Maki and Shuichi (whether or not Tenko died), which might change things a little for people other than Himiko herself. Maki would be watching Himiko work on trying to express her emotions in a context that's being paralleled with the struggles Maki's trying to overcome. So maybe this could have got Maki to more consciously think about expressing her own emotions, which is something she has difficulty with too after having repressed them for so long, but that she doesn't precisely ever make quite such a conscious effort about in canon like Himiko does.

Also, if we assume that Kaito's issues are relatively unchanged and trial 4 still goes basically the same as it does in canon, Himiko being his sidekick could make a difference for early chapter 5. In canon, when she's not even his sidekick, Himiko still indicates that she's thought a little about Kaito's feelings and what he might be going through, as well as just how his behaviour is making Shuichi feel. But if she'd been actively a part of that sidekick group and had seen first-hand how Kaito's sidekicks - namely Shuichi - look up to him and learn from him, Himiko in particular would have had the capacity to potentially piece things together and figure out the real reason Kaito was avoiding Shuichi. After all, she's been in exactly the same position as Shuichi is here. (This is about my hot take on Himiko's FTEs that I discussed in one of my commentary posts, which I still enjoy thinking about. Kaito has parallels and connections to so many characters in this story and it’s great.)

[serpentprinceravenhairedprincess]

I ship Jeronica a lot but I'd love for you to do an analysis on their dynamic💕 Love your blog.

Hey there 💕 Thank you so much, I’m so happy you enjoy my blog :D

Going to their analysis..well, there’s a lot to say on the dynamic between those two. It’s kinda difficult because after season 2, everything got really messed up and the characters are not easy to outline (like, who are they anymore, amirite?). That’s why I always focused a lot on the first two season, in analyzing them. But I think it’s time to move forward: first because I’ve already said so much stuff about s1-2, but also because we are facing a time jump so...let’s get to it.

At this point of the narrative (taking for good the shitty writing we got), I think everybody in the core 4 kinda lost themselves. Jeronica wise: Veronica is spinning around the obvious contrast between her and Hiram, while Jughead stumbled from school to school and from being the king of a gang to...basically nothing. The centre of their whole world are the relationship they have right now, so Betty for Jug and Archie for Ronnie. They are relying on them so much that it feels kinda like a dead weight on the shoulders of the other two.  Of course, they are living a really peculiar period in everyone’s life. Facing graduation is a huge defining moment: you start to ask yourself who you are, where you are going, what you want to achieve and who you are willing to take with you on the journey. It’s the start of adulthood, and in order to take that step forward and let go of childhood, you have to sacrifice something - metaforically killing a part of yourself. In this sense, as narrative usually goes, that means breaking up with your high school sweetheart. 

That’s what we are working with right now. Both Jug and Ronnie are not looking at each other: they are not even really seeing each other. That’s the point. They are clinging to what they know and makes them feel safe, even though those relationships are obviously starting to slowly deteriorate. Cause, come on, cheating is at any level a huge red flag for something not working. And beware! It’s not working for everybody. The only difference between barchie and jeronica is that they have different perspectives and also different “safe havens”. Barchie always had each other since they were children, while Veronica and Jughead met in the midst of their teenage years. It’s only obvious that when these couples face a difficult moment like this, Betty and Archie would turn to each other, while Veronica and Jughead desperately cling to what they have - since is also the only thing they actually have.

Jughead and Veronica never really explored their relationship. They always felt connect to one another by their significant others. And that’s a huge point that I think we should get to see in s5. Cause, as I said in other posts, it’s based on prejudice and on the way their characters are built. Both of them always jump to conclusion the quickest, building an idea of people and situations in their own mind and taking this for fact instead of just assumptions. In this sense, one could make a good point by saying that Betty and Archie help them smoothing their edges. To which I answer: no, they don’t. They just kinda dull their characters. That’s not even growth, it’s just...emotional lethargy.

Jeronica is Pride and Prejudice 101. They have that quality that comes not just from the indeniable chemistry between the actors (haters, don’t come at me but if you are reading this and you do not agree, I’m sorry but you’re consciously lying to yourselves). It also comes from their backstories and their characters’ subtleties, which have the possibility to interact almost on a chemical level and create a nice friction that always works really well both on the screen and on the page. Two similar, but also opposite characters are the right recipe for a great love story. Mostly because they bring a challenge to one another, triggering growth. 

In my opinion, the fact that they might get closer due to the cheating bomb is just the needed sparkle to lighten a whole other narrative. Their relationship shouldn’t be based on self commiseration, or on revenge make out session. The breakup should just serve the purpose of making them look at each other. That’s it. Then the next step is seeing each other, understanding each other and by aknowledging that they had looked at one another through prejudice filled lenses, also growing as people and learn a life lesson on how to interact with the world.

I’ll close with a general reflection. The writers seriously need to get these characters back on track, because we are losing them as individuals. They had been spinning around the same mistakes and the same narrative for too long. This needs to change. And also, of course, on a more basic level, it’s always more entertaining to have some drama instead of flat narratives set in stone. That’s the main reason why Riverdale keeps losing viewers: because it’s just not interesting anymore. Nothing changes. Except for the weird ass background plots that, let’s face it, nobody is really here for. In my experience as a spectator and as someone who has an interest in this industry and got to study about its functioning: the viewer doesn’t know what he/she wants. Especially if we are talking about a young audience. They might be really vocal about their likings - sometimes even too much - but if you don’t keep them on their toes, if you don’t poke them..they will eventually lose interest. It doesn’t matter which endgame you give, as long as you create an interesting journey. Writing shouldn’t be safe betting. Fans are not gonna leave you, even the ones who say they will. Especially those, actually, because they are the most invested. Playing it safe, in these cases, always leads to dead ends, because at the end of the day people will remember your show for the emotions you gave them. Emotions are created from contrast, from highs and lows, from wanting something and then finally getting it or having a door slammed in your face. These are the only moments people are gonna remember in a few years, when they are older and reminiscing the good old days. Safeness, validation and mild satisfaction just don’t make the cut.