#its not 1 to 1 but thats alright
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Man getting into Madoka Magica (again) and Starwars (for the first time) is such a weird combo.
Anyway
inspo below:

#i've got like an entire pmmm witch design for this guy#oh god the colors look ASS on mobile whyyyy#star wars#the clone wars#I got the shoulder thing wrong fuuuck#arc trooper fives#gekidan inu curry#puella magi madoka magica#those are madoka magica witch runes; they spell out 'fives'#i like using sketchier lineart sometimes#its not 1 to 1 but thats alright#and i put blue there cuz i could!
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!!!!! A LOVELY COMMISSION MADE BY @sleepylemi-in-space / sleepylemi (vgen) !!!!!! ive been patiently waiting for this one and its absolutely worth the wait, im so emotional and jolly over how beautiful this was.... i am forever thankful ...!!!! 💚 constabell nation wins again!!!!!
#op was INCREDIBLY wonderful to work with. they were aware it was nor.ton's birthday yesterday and wanted to make this extra nicey....#i wanted to cry sm becuz pls thats so so thoughtful of them aaahhh ahh omg ;w;#wonderfully ENCAPSULATED the essence of epilogue constabell. canon frfr ending of constabell. however u say it#look at norton!?!??!?! hes so loving and gentle!?!??! THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER?#the way she LOOKS ?!?!1 goddess HELLO ?!#this was the comm where i hesitated to put the gold bands... yall i was so nervous abt that but they followed thruuu#im really thankful for that boost of support from u guys like i really wasnt gonna do it until u guys spoke up gnkfnkfnfgf#im gonna rebrand my blog to align to this. for ma enjoyment. hehee#op- if you come across this since i tagged you w your actual url- hope its alright! you deserve the praise and i would love to boost you <3#they're closed for comms right now but absolute reccomend <33333 i literally made a vgen acc for them HGJDHSFFSDHJDSFHS#ANYWAYS ENOUGH BABBLE FROM ME..!! I SHALL STARE AT THIS YAY <3 <3 <3#💚 for me#💚 constabell#ohohooo ma constabells my lovelies ooohoh#BTW THE THANK YOU ART MADE ME FLIP ITS SUCH A CUTE SURPRISE WJWKEJEKJKEJEE OMG THEYRE SO CUTE AND TINY AND GGNIS AAAAAAAAAAA (EXPLODES)#dividers by cafekitsune
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need a comic book wrapped or something so i can reflect on how obsessive i was
#snap chats#one time i looped Evil by interpol for like four hours straight and i need to see my comic book equivalent to that#'are you thinking about' i am thinking about 309 again sorry but im not sorry im not saying its my favorite issue ever however.#its going to stick with me until my body is rotting in the earth i think#it just has a lot i could want out of a charles-centric issue. at least in regards to his relationships with himself and others#i fear today i was thinking of how he lowkey wished he died in that snowstorm cause i mean 1.) thats a mood 2.) Oh Charles..#//loud sight// id say im gonna smack him but amelia beat me to that 💀#beating on a disabled man is crazy and then you want him to hold you afterwards GIRL .... idc about misunderstanding what is that..#anyways. i wish i were not ill and yet here i am#maybe if i actually focused on the work i gotta do i could finally get to the shit i WANNA do and then ill be free 👁️👄👁️#i already decided to take all of january off from comm stuff so if i just lock in for this week ill be good to be ill#alright bye. maybe if i went to a cafe or somethign i could focus better... <- im not doing that
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btw similar to the whole "if you try adderall at a party and it calms you down, get an adhd test" thing, if at some point in your life you try microdosing shrooms with a friend and end up feeling like a functional person for the first time in your life, get tested for depression. like yeah hallucinogens come with elation so youre probably gonna have some "this is the best ive ever felt in my life" vibes regardless, but like. if that in and of itself feels like finally breathing in for the first time in years, thats for sure a sign that something is up with your ability to process serotonin most of the time. feeling better than ever before should be a nice bonus, not a crushing weight off your chest
#fun fact there are currently multiple ongoing studies vis a vis the effectiveness of psilocybin on depression#both on its own and as a companion to ssris#psylocybin targets the 5ht2a serotonin receptors which wikipedia tells me are more numerous in the brains of those with depression#so like. if you spend most of your life feeling like your brain is an aquarium with a leak in it and serotonin is the water and your default#state is 'slightly damp gravel grinding painfully against itself' thats ummm not normal 👍#and on the flipside of that if you have depression that no other med has worked for and know a guy. its 1000% worth it#origibberish#also i say 'wikipedia tells me' as if i just looked it up but that all comes from a long night of spite filled research after i asked my#psychiatrist if we could use the fact that psylocybin worked for me as a basis to like. narrow down which legal antidepressant#might work instead of basically just throwing darts at a board every time#and after several minutes explaining to her that i was not just asking her to prescribe me shrooms but in a legal way she went#'ohhhh yeah no unfortunately theres been no research into that‚ yeah.... sorry......:)'#which. as far as 'lies you come up with on the spot to avoid having to say i dont know' go‚ that is. maybe the worst one to pick#like. 'no‚ thats not an option'? alright fine maybe theres some internal rules or something who knows#'theres no research' though just. immediately tanks any and all credibility 100% even on its own but considering the subject matter?#youre telling me. that humans. the famously curious species that researches fucking Everything. and also Loves playing with drugs. when#trying to figure out how to make drugs that make brains feel good. would not start with the drugs they already knew made brains feel good.#youre telling me that not one (1) singular scientist tried shrooms and went 'oh my god wait. i dont feel like im dying for the first time#ever. holy fuck i need to study this'#complete misplay. absolutely legendary fumble. there were so many ways to fuck it up and somehow you found the worst. congratulations#om the other hand though. really was an excellent setup for the punchline that is the voicemail i have from them saying she'd been fired LOL#they didnt say what for specifically but yknow. based on my own experiences i certainly have theories jebfksbfk#it was annoying in the moment but at the end of the day i have shrooms and she doesnt have the job so. whos laughing now emily KSBFKSBFKDN#this is what i mean though like. rn i feel fine. not on top of the world‚ not like a god#just. fine. i just dont feel like shit. i feel like i can do stuff if i want to‚ or chill peacefully and have it actually be. relaxing.#i dont feel like gravel right now‚ i feel like a person.#and god what a fucking relief it is#really i guess the moral overall is that if at any point you react to trying a new drug the same way an addict craving a hit for days would#then there maybe is something up with your brain chemistry because that means your default state of existence is comparable to that#of withdrawal. a famously shit experience
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I'm sincerely so stupid I've misread the album release date as June 18th for like MONTHS when it is July 18th LMAOOOOOOOO
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We rlly don’t need another majima game 😭 please give other characters a chance he already had the spotlight in 0😔
lord if i speak on goro majima.
#snap chats#my last nerve was seeing him front and center on that Three Legends shirt with daigo and saejima im SICK OF HIM#what do you MEAN the Sixth Chairman is backseating majima. like thats his retainer PUT DAIGO UP FRONT#it aint even bias its gen just like. why is the sixth chairman not treated the most important. thats The Chairman of the whole shit#EX chairman whatever we know what i mean#'snap its just a shirt' and these are just my balls alright its all the little things that are like Dawg Cmon#i woulda got the shirt cause it looks like somethign youd get from claires and thats hilarious However ... im annoying.#ill say this then play y0 and be like Ah..... i love you...#fr tho im sick of him GO AWAY YOU ARE NOT THAT GUY#im that meme of spiderman holding back the train and the trains saying mean things about majima#this ire is only brought by rggtwt mates insisting majima needs any more content. like at all.#they gave majima a y0 statue but as far as i can see kiryu doesnt have one like What.#ik i say id skip y0 kiryu if i could during replays and its never that serious but still .... the hell...#my brother in christ majima does not need any more why are you acting starved#i get it hes your fave but my god. goku this trains heavier than i thought i cant do it#ive had beef with rggtwt ever since they tried to say majima was more important to kiryu than haruka. like brb eating a cactus#rgg making gaiden was the worst thing they couldve done cause now everyone wont stop mentioning charas getting a gaiden game#MAJIMA OF ALL OF THEM DOES NOT NEED ONE MFER THATS WHAT Y0 WAS FOR. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT#THEY GAVE HIM AN EXTRA STORY IN YK2 ALSO LIKE RGG IS DOING THE MOST FOR A SIDE CHARACTER#anyway this is why im happy saejima and akiyama are getting figures. ESPECIALLY AKIYAMA#I FEEL LIKE WE NEVER SEE SHIT OF THAT GUY and saejima. tbh. but still ... akiyama esp just feels left out#big hope other charas start to get more love. like my daughter haruka ok rgg plesae drop one of her idol statues thank you#on a lighter note september is almost upon us which means two things#1.) i have to move back to school at the end of the month 2.) rgg news is soon .....#SOOO curious as to what's on the horizon .. maybe ill stream it for the first time in nine thousand years#ok bye im gonna eat cereal <- diced spam and rice
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I just read Chapter 4 of ms2 and AAUAAUUAGHHGHGHG
Also I was half-joking when I put in that caiowe ship chart post bout Owen bringing Cain up every chance he gets and... he... he really does... doesn't he???
OWEN?!?!!?!?!!?! HE EVEN DEFENDS HIM???????????? STAAAARRRS HE LOVES CAIN SO MUCH I CAN'T WITH HIM
He can't even deny it... He can't even say no... He KNOWS it's true cuz my guy is so attached to Cain it's ridiculous.
AAAUUGGHHGHHG???? It's Sir Knight, yes, okay, thank you Owen, always gotta make sure he's referred to accordingly, yep, Owen hates him yeah, Owen hates (LYING LIAR WHO LIES) Cain sooo much, yep. That's the truth. Owen even siding with Cain during the betting LIKE OUOUUGHHGHG
Funny time over... man 😔 Owen yearns for a community so badly huh... He's so sick and tired of being alone he just wants to have others around him MAAAAAN. Owen taking Arthur's side too... Oh he's so fond of Central Wizards FOR REAL. Akira, I love you so much, they continue to hope for a better world for the wizards uueueueueeuueeuue
#aria rants#alright thats enough ms 2 for the day i can only handle 1 chapter a day cuz the Fear sets in faster with mhyk stories#also honourable mention: owen using magic to keep his hat from falling to the ground. it really do be defying gravity with use of magic#im still not over the fact that OWEN keeps bringing cain up unprompted every chance he gets like-- you spend some time#with owen and then he'd just randomly mention sir knight and get mad if you dare try to criticize him like-- OKAY OWEN#also ngl reading this chapter feels like a door to my brain was opened-- like-- it feels as if i just got an epiphany in regards to owen#it feels like an invisible power up ding! sounded atop my head as if my understanding of owen leveled up. i love it!#ill try to read a chapter once a day so i can finally finish ms2 in its entirety AND THEN! id be able to power up my writing for caiowe!
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what if I stream tonite. for dragon business
#bakuspeech#taking one (1) day break from comm bc my brain was starting to melt outta my ears#and try to figure out some lunar new year stuff instead#it is now a new year and the red envelope duty has come around once again#second year. I drew cats for the niblings last year. its dragons this time around#and since its like 20 red envelopes I can Probably fix up and assemble the myself#I dont. like the idea of buying red envelopes. esp since there will be like A Doller inside lmao#I'd rather use the card envelopes with something scribbled on top rather than buy red envelopes. idk Im a weirdo abt this#but yeah. dragons first. and then I'll see if the shrink film I have is printable#if not I'll do stickers. I still have sticker paper#thats the plan. I'll probs bring up all the shit that happened to or around me in 2023 on stream lmao#and see if my friends are good to hang out on stream with me#okay. alright. uhhh probs I'll try and be live at 8pm (in 3hrs)? been a slow day Ive done nothing but walking very slowly around the house#mmm. have a good day guys. perhaps see u on stream. lets have fun
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Based on this post
For @jeynepoole and @kingslionheart and @cayleyhannha-blog
#the last kingdom#sevenkingsmustdie#this is truly just a vibe#the first panel I have no clue#I just wanted to use a different image#I think the vibes work#they're in love#and i'm obsessed#so normal about them#also yes yes yes I know that its an excerpt from an orpheus eurydice retelling#look my defense for using this is#1 - its a vibe#2 - they are some orpheus eurydice type; Aelswith would go to hell to get Alfred back. Lets be real here she would and you all know it#alright I need to go to bed#thats enough unhinged edits for now#tlk aelswith#tlk alfred#aelswith x alfred#alfred x aelswith
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saw the new alien movie! it was. um. well. there certainly was an alien in it
#my post#im so bad w names idk who anyone was except for andy#but why did the main girl have exactly equal amounts of chemistry with both the brother and sister characters#i mean like good for her. movie was a roller coaster of its so over were so back every time i thought the sister died#anyways the resident evil baby was not pleasant and i did not like him. wheres my babygirl the xenomorph#ALSOOO THE ROBOT FROM THE ORIGINAL WAS THERE. BUT HE WAS CERY MUCH CG AND BAD LOOKING#LIKE THEY DID NOT DO A GOOD JOB. ESP WITH THE MOUTH. WHAT WAS WRONG W HIS TEETH….#one thing i did like was the incredibly literal chekovs gun. someone in the writers room googled that immediately before writing that scene#the gun lasting on 1% ammo longer than the other 99% was so funny#what else is there to say about this movie#oh. oh. andy.#autistic robot trope. ok. alright. forgivable.#…….so like why was the only black person in the movie programmed to serve a white person. like. im not crazy right. that was fucking weird#right. im apparently the only one in my familu who noticed but. thats not. who allowed this. why did no one stop this.#uhhh overall. it was ok. dialogue sucked ass. there were like 7000 xenomorphs for some reason.
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oh my god i just finished the dark forest finally. 7/10 i suppose, i went through the first half or so of the book being really annoyed by luo ji but also enjoying the chapters where he shows up because unfortunately he was entertaining. still don't understand the imaginary girlfriend thing, it just feels like he needs someone to protect from the world which like ??? ok sure i guess, it just rubs me the wrong way personally. for the second half and especially the end i became luo ji's number one defender it's fine. for the rest, holy crap—the droplet, the microcosm of the universe on those runaway ships, the wallfacer project, luo ji drawing from rey diaz's plan, the attitude of the world towards him, the entire theory... wow
#i dont even know my brain's exploding#i don't think it's an incredibly great plot per se but it's enough to keep me interested and the concepts are interesting and thats enough#again shi qiang the mandatory emotional support. i was so touched when he said goodbye to luo ji even tho it was just a false alarm#also dongfang yanxu (btw her name??? homophone for 'the east lives on'??) and those two other captains using just their eyes to#communicate just like zhuang yan imagined... ough and then all that destruction#三体#tbh was reminded of the trisolarians when zhang beihai started waxing on about the new morals the new humanity might have#make judgements without feeling and yet it killed him in the end#generally the moment luo ji wakes up and is almost killed 6 times (kind of funny tbh) shit literally just kept happening#also @ great depression 2. like the great ravine or smth? idk it felt close to cultural rev 2. greenpeace as a 人奸 organization💀💀💀💀💀💀#the aesthetics of trisolarians are great tho. first the droplet then the giant signaling device they send#so beautiful its something humans can't even imagine is a nice description. reminds me illogically of eschers art#王明军 the audiobook reader needs like 10 million awards actually. i feel like i didn't really think abt it when listening to book 1#but his voice and narration is really good he reads with feeling which is incredible for when i dont want to keep reading#my post#i was very touched at the end tho he really said i'll become an alcoholic#the wallfacer project and its tolls on the saviors of the world or something#also a surprising amount of christianity references i feel#idk tho#three body problem#main gripes were that the switching of perspectives bored me lol the three retired old grandpas were alright#but i was bored out of my mind at zhang beihai's pov before shit started going down sorry dude#it annoys me how grandpas + chang weisi and all those other people kind of just get written out but i suppose this is not the target f#for science fiction anyways??
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My uni friends want to teach me pop culture basics and im like. how do i tell you i couldnt give less of a shit
#i sometimes think im not that weird and then i talk with them#and im like ooh that's right you've stopped judging yourself by normie standards#today for example they were talking about this summer's music and i was like who are these ppl#they were like omg you must know who billie eilish is at least. i knew exactly 1 song about her and its from 2017 apparently (bad guy)#and they were like damn okay well olivia rodrigo? and i was like ooh thats the good 4 u girl isnt she#they were like 💀💀💀💀 for some reason#and the other ppl i had heard of them but couldnt even name 1 song from them like idk ariana grande chappel roan or however you write that#i literally dont even know what kind of music they make im so out of everything#no but rlly it feels like we grew up in completely different worlds what do you mean you lived only 40 mins away#(literally everyone grew up like this its not a distance thing)#but yeah now they are like omg we gotta teach you at least the basics and i was like alright but only if i can teach you tumblr culture🤑🤑#im trying to get them into tumblr rn ive gotten 2 of them to make an acc but they didnt even install the app so im working on that#we are mutuals already tho#anyways yeah we will get there eventually we can do it#mine#life#friends
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Not very fond of people like waving off testament’s gender as just a Gear Thing but well at least it becomes funny when people apply it to gears as a whole. Like yeah i can agree with that. It has nothing to do with being a gear tho theyre all just transgender
#okay ill talk about it seriously down here#it does feel like the original intent behind their androgyny was to kind of Other them from humanity#daisuke saying theyve transcended humanity / talking about their ‘inhuman beauty’#i dont want to call it dehumanizing since theres like. a weird positive (…i guess) angle of them being ‘above’ humanity#thats just kind of a trope though. like nonhuman characters without a human concept of gender or sexuality. yknow#but anyway strive didnt really go back on this. they kinda made it a part of their arc?#i think dev backyard says that theyve ‘lived without the concept of gender’ since being turned into a gear#but theres no disconnect from humanity that goes along with that anymore#i like the implication that reconciling with humanity and more importantly their OWN humanity coincided with their presumable transition!#alright now for the part of this i dont like. its weird to assume the gear conversion had some effect on their body and THATS why theyre nb#i think any implications of that are vague enough to be dismissed#i wouldnt even call them Implications its like. messy (and contradictory!) early 2000s phrasing and a theory about 1 line of dialogue lol#early fandom stuff im aware of but dont know enough to talk about aside. nowadays its just used to like#excuse their androgyny. by gamers who cant just. believe that theyre nonbinary because they want to be. lol#not because of anything that was done to their body against their will. or even more simply because theyre just a gear and are Above gender#literally theyre just nonbinary. isnt that cool. i wish everyone could agree this is cool and end the discussion there.#except for me. i can discuss it all i want forever. because im the understander.#whatever. at least the section of testament’s wiki page theorizing about their genitalia is gone now. kissaroo for whoever took that off.#I NEED TO WRITE UP THAT TIMELINE IM LITERALLY NOT KIDDING WHEN I SAY IM AUTISTIC ABOUT TESTAMENT’S GENDER. CLEARLY#the kat goes meow#gg
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ignore how many WIPs i have going on shush shush
tmph one year old okay?
[making a piece for each song on its release date, this one his Grew On Me's messy sketch of it :} might post the others wips too]
#atlas art wips#i love this outift so much im so sad he never wore it again#especially with a better camera so i can actually see how the outfit looks properly#cos i THINK theres a texture thing on the crop top?? also the skirt kinda just looks like a long sleeve shirt tide around his waist#idk the ref photos are like 10 PIXELS#either way the outfit looks very cool. lighting & flipped hair are a nice touch to it#outfits a sick vibe alright ? lemme rant about it#heh. sick. grew on me. im funny#anyway#cj pls wear this fit again. even for just like 5 frames. i just need ONE clear image#its. as the kids say. such a slay.#anyway. i love grew on me#this was just a reason to rant about grew on me#its so so good#i like the og but cjs is just a diff vibe yk#can just sit there & stare at the wall/ceiling an just vibe#thats why its at 1055 plays.... jeez#thats not even my number 1 played cj song help#it IS 3rd tho#fif is my top one :}#dtip being 2nd#OH YEAH! I just hit 1000 on SUYS too#i like music can you tell?#if an interest of mine has banger music i WILL be more into it#if that interest IS music? lord fears my contestant mental flow. or lack there of#almost 2 years bby i am DOOMED to listen for an eternity#its 2:30am so im ranting inane nonsense again apologies#i like grew on me :}#moss rants#might as well count
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Gmorning chat :3
#rae's silly rambles :3#its 4:57AM#woke up 1:45am and have not slept since#i think i fell asleep at 10:30pm ???#idk#thats not that bad#3 hours 15 minutes is alright
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Tomorrow I need to do an eye checkup in english (instead of german aka the norm) and I just checked if there are any better ways to explains things or tell people what to do etc instead of my basically direct translations and turns out
nope
it sounds exactly as stupid as i already worded it, no special words or better formed sentences around 10/10 school english is good enough (nice)
#txts#i am not excited#bc its always difficult to do specialized shit in another language#AND the person i am examining doesnt even know english and has a translator#so I speak english and the translator translates it over#which CAN be fine#but for finer reactions it can screw things over a bit so i hope thats not the case (:#also my coworker who can also do these in english got salty and decided to not do them anymore bc its not in his job description#which like-great i guess we can all just decide not to do things#like....an eye exam which IS in our job description with no languages specified (:#but then he is also the first to cry about ppl not going above and beyond#truly amazing thinking there#its not even like its truly hard its just annoying to do if the person you examin doesnt fucking understand you#goes for native german speakers as well#some ppl just dont have braincells#'please look at the number 9 in the 3 line'#//begins to read the entire thing from the top again#look-stupidity is not a sin and neither is misunderstanding stuff even if sometimes idek how you could#but also.....pls just actually listen and comprehend the words i am using#also dont suddenly throw out a 3rd or 4th option on a 2 question answer#or dont fucking interrupt me during a question either (:#'alright so do you prefer 1 or-' 'URGH NO THATS SO BAD NO NEVER' 'OR 2' 'NOOOOOO THATS BAD!!!!! I CANT SEE!!!'#yes m'am we are fuCKING WORKING ON IT#RELAX PLEASE DEAR FUCKNG GOD WE ARE LIKE 30SECONDS IN#this suddenly turned into a tags-rant oops#but yeah#pet peeve is ppl fucking interrupting me (: or not listening at all ever (:
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