#maybe i should do these in python who cares

[miraclemaya]

leetcode makes me so angry sometimes it makes me so mad. or maybe it is just c++ and i dont understand it at all how is this throwing errors it's literally written the exact same way as this working solution, did i accidentally use some sort of hidden keyword i do not know about, yes probably.

[tsartistry]

I love the Niobe kidnaps Lester AU! I’m already so invested in it! But I have many questions…

1. How does Leto (aka mama Leto) feel about this?

2. What is/how are the Apollo kids feeling? Are their powers not working as much or what?

3. How is Olympus doing? Is someone doing apollos work? Are they trying to investigate or are they trying to pretend that nothing is happening?

4. Did Lester/apollo gain their powers back before Niobe kidnapped him? And since he’s being brainwashed did he forget he does have powers if he gained them again or are they just completely gone?

5. Will Lester/apollo have a love interest?

And last question for this post I swear lol does Lester/apollo ever show signs of their powers once and awhile? Like for example if their hair starts to go blonde suddenly?

Sorry for so many questions, I’m just so invested in this AU ever since I discovered it lol I keep going back to this tag just to reread everything :3

1. How does Mama Leto feel about all this?

in a nutshell?

For the past several thousand years, Leto's had a lot of trust in Zeus. Even during Apollo's trials, while she was begging him to end the trials and restore her son's divinity, she still trusted him. Surely if Apollo succeeded at his trials, then Zeus would keep his word and restore him to Olympus. And if he failed -- she did not want to think about him failing, but she still trusted she would see her son again. Somehow.

But now, it's not a matter of success or failure; Apollo is just gone. Leto can't find any trace of him, and suddenly Zeus isn't giving her any answers. She can't exactly bring wrath down upon the King of the Olympus the way she did Niobe millennia ago. All she can do is ask everyone she knows for help finding her son, and stew in her worry as she waits for any scrap of information.

She's not doing great.

(Whenever she finds out about Niobe's involvement, all that anxiety turns into RAAAAAGE)

2. What is/how are the Apollo kids feeling? Are their powers not working as much or what?

Their powers are weakened, but still working! Their spirits... not so much. It's not like Apollo to give them radio silence. When they ask the other gods for information, they provide no answers. But where Leto was filled with anxiety, the Apollo kids are on the cusp of despair. The only thing they're holding on to is Nico saying he didn't feel Lester die; But if that's the case, where is he?

3. How is Olympus doing? Is someone doing apollos work? Are they trying to investigate or are they trying to pretend that nothing is happening?

I hadn't thought about who was doing Apollo's work, but thinking about it now, it's probably either Hermes or Artemis. Maybe they switch off? Hermes has a precedent for handling Apollo's animals, and Artemis would want to ensure her brother's position as sun god is cared for and not usurped. She saw what happened to Helios, after all.

But Olympus is tense. Zeus is convinced that Apollo went into hiding, perhaps hoping that Zeus will come begging for him to come defeat Python --

Oh, yeah, Python's still around, by the way! He's still digesting the power of the Triumvirate, and still has complete control over Delphi, and there is now a risk of him using his power and position to start taking control of fate. With every day that passes, the serpent's power grows, and the tension among the Olympians builds.

Unfortunately, fate has decreed the absent Apollo would be the one to defeat the serpent. But Zeus will not stoop to begging Apollo to come back; That would be showing weakness! He's fine waiting out his son's little tantrum. He's just making it harder for himself, after all; Every day Python grows more powerful. But that's Apollo's problem. Why should Zeus be worried about an evil serpent possibly taking control of fate itself?

Yeah, Zeus is panicking. He pretends to know where Apollo is, but he's as clueless as everyone else, and it's terrifying. Even in the guise of a mortal, what could make an entire god disappear so suddenly? And could Python pull the strings of fate to force the Olympians to fall?

Despite his efforts to look cool and collected, the other Olympians are starting to see the cracks in his facade. Poseidon especially is starting to smell blood in the water, so to speak.

4. Did Lester/apollo gain their powers back before Niobe kidnapped him? And since he’s being brainwashed did he forget he does have powers if he gained them again or are they just completely gone?

I wouldn't say they're gone, but I would say he does not have access to them. The power still exists, but he cannot reach it.

The brainwashing and the lost powers are two separate things that were done to him. Niobe actually did some magical shenanigans (with the help of a Greek goddess I won't name just yet, it's someone who has never appeared in the Riordanverse) to actually remove parts of Apollo's soul to prevent him from accessing them.

5. Will Lester/apollo have a love interest?

I don't have any plans to write any romance for Lester, but who knows, maybe as I'm writing I'll get struck with inspiration! But the story's already complicated enough, haha, romance might tangle it up even more.

And last question for this post I swear lol does Lester/apollo ever show signs of their powers once and awhile? Like for example if their hair starts to go blonde suddenly?

Yes! While he's lost access to most of his powers due to Niobe's meddling on top of Zeus turning him mortal, she overlooked his music powers! It's actually a plot point that he can use music and rhythm to guide people's emotions and movements.

I like to imagine that if he practices hard & concentrates, he can trigger an entire diegetic musical number. The kind where he can get a whole crowd singing and dancing together. Unfortunately that sort of thing is difficult to convey in writing.

Sorry for so many questions, I’m just so invested in this AU ever since I discovered it lol I keep going back to this tag just to reread everything :3

aaa that makes me so happy!! Please don't feel bad about asking questions, it helps me fill in details I hadn't thought about before :D

speaking of Apollo's music powers, here's a bonus doodle

[rosesradio]

how it feels to write...

valdangelo: i'm in my friend's gaming room, and they just pulled out a huge box of snacks i'm not allowed to have at home. super smash bros is cued up on the wii. it's 2013, and nothing bad has happened yet.

jercy: i'm sitting in a field at my old high school, the air cool and refreshing as i crack open a new queer romance i requested the library to order. some people are playing football in the distance, though i couldn't tell you who's winning or what's going on. it's a spirit week day, and i'm allowed to wear a hat.

lukercy: i'm in the club when i shouldn't be. i have plans the next day, though maybe i should forget about them. there's someone speaking to me, their voice warm and low. i don't know their name and don't care to know. i can only look at their lips.

valgrace: i'm with an old boyfriend in his shoebox apartment, talking for hours until we realize it's way past the time i should be home. it doesn't matter. his bed is warm and time stands still as i am, for a fleeting moment, understood.

lukethan: i am crawling through a haunted maze that the church put together, my heart pounding. i'm not sure why i'm so scared; my parents said everything would be okay. the money is for a good cause. it's dark, and i can only hear my own shallow breathing. a warm hand latches out like a python, grasping my ankle.

jasico: i'm weaving through the trees at girl scout camp. after the third time walking through the poison ivy fields, i have no rash; perhaps i am immune, perhaps i am a superhero. there is a large cement box in the center of a field, some sort of industrial project i do not yet understand. inside there is a deep, empty blackness. it calls out to me. i should jump in.

lukabeth: i am at a party at my friend's house, playing a game one of them found online. hands wrap around my throat, pressing me to the bedroom door. i black out, dreaming in shades of yellow. in the dream, i'm yelling at my sister, crying to her. i am ignored. i wake up, gripping the carpet with sweaty hands. a strange man comforts me, telling me i shouldn't have played such a stupid game. his breath smells of alcohol. there are no sober adults in the house.

x readers: i am in an auditorium, putting on a play like i used to as a kid. much like the stress dreams, i have over forty lines and didn't crack open the script. i manage, and i look out, and i wait. the lights don't blind me this time. i can see everyone in the audience. they wear masks and clap politely. the sound is muffled, fading into silence like tv static. their eyes are expectant once more.

[howlingday]

Panthera Tigris Tigris Nikos

Jaune: Hey, Pyrrha? Can I have a hug?

Pyrrha: Of course, Jaune! (Hugs)

Jaune: (Sinks into her)

Pyrrha: Would anyone else like-

Nora: (Dragging Ren) MEMEMEME~!

Fun Fact! Bengal tigers are big. Females have been documented to reach 400 pounds, males 500 pounds, and occasionally larger specimens reaching 700 pounds. Royal Bengal Tigers are reportedly even bigger, with one specimen shot by David Hasinger in 1967 was reported to be 857 pounds, measured at 11 feet long, and left paw prints "the size of dinner plates," and it's last meal was a live water buffalo weighed down by an eighty-pound weight. It is displayed in the Smithsonian Institutions's National Museum of Natural History, in the Hall of Mammals.

---------------------------------------------------

Pyrrha: Ready for our run, Jaune?

Jaune: You bet! Maybe this time I could-

Pyrrha: (Ear flicks) Oh, uh, why don't you keep warming up, Jaune? I need to grab something from the dorm.

Jaune: Oh, uh, sure thing, Pyrrha. I'll be right here.

Cardin: (Sitting on the roof) What the hell? Where's Nikos go- (Door swings open, Mauled)

Fun Fact! Bengal Tigers are fast. They can make short sprints of forty miles per hour, which is about the speed of a thoroughbred horse. An incident with a startled tigress mother with her cubs in Nepal in 1974 resulted in the death of a researcher who was hiding 15 feet in a tree. In 2007, on Christmas Day at the San Francisco Zoo, an Amur Tiger cleared a thirty-foot moat to maul three visitors who were harassing the tiger, killing one of them before being killed after four shots to the skull by responding police officer's .40-caliber-pistol rounds. It should be noted that the Amur was a captive tiger, raised from birth in the zoo. Imagine a wild tiger raised in the jungle.

---------------------------------------------------

Pyrrha: Are you okay, Jaune?

Jaune: Y-Yeah, I... Wait, what about the goliath?!

Pyrrha: It's okay, Jaune. I took care of it.

Jaune: But how, Pyrrha? (Holding) Your weapons-!

Pyrrha: (Takes, Smiles) I took care of it.

Jaune: (Looks behind her, Sees dead goliath)

Fun Fact! Bengal Tigers are strong. Their bite force can reach up to a thousand pounds, which is much stronger than a pitbull's and about a quarter of a great white shark. Their prey includes deer, buffalo, bison, bears, rhinos, and elephants. A single blow can break a bear's spine, and easily decapitate a human.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Thanks again for letting us come visit, Mrs. Nikos.

Mama Nikos: Oh, Jaune, don't be so formal. We're practically family, so just call me Mama.

Jaune: Uh... No, I'll just stick with Mrs. Nikos, if you don't mind.

Mama Nikos: Oh, you are just so polite! I'm glad Pyrrha could have such a handsome team leader like you.

Pyrrha: (Blushing) M-Mom...

Nora: Can I have more meat buns, Mama?

Ren: Nora...

Nora: Oh, right! Khm! May I have more meat buns, Mama?

Mama Nikos: They're in the oven.

Jaune: So what do you do for a living, Mrs. Nikos?

Mama Nikos: I'm a personal fitness trainer. It's actually how I met Pyrrha's father. He said he could perform a perfect double twister kick, and I told him it was impossible unless he could twist and launch himself at a 167 degree rotation with a north-northwest gale blowing at 3.5 miles per hour behind him-

Mama Nikos: (Ding!) Oh! Meat buns are done!

Jaune: Huh...

Pyrrha: Don't worry. I didn't get it the first time, either.

Fun Fact! Bengal tigers are smart. Cubs are raised by their mothers for two and a half to three years. There are also notes of tigers imitating deer and bear calls. They will chase larger prey into water, tear at buffalo legs to bring them to the ground, and will flip porcupines from to their backs to avoid spines. There are also records of tigers killing 15-foot crocodiles, 20-foot pythons, 300-pound seals, and a 20-year-old elephant.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Hm? Hey, Pyrrha? Who's this standing with your mom?

Pyrrha: Hm? Oh... That's... That's my mother. She... She's not around anymore.

Jaune: Do... Do you want to talk about it?

Pyrrha: I... I don't know where to begin. She was my hero, but she did something really bad, and she died when I was really young. And I...

Jaune: Hey. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.

Pyrrha: (Leans on Jaune) I was probably six years old when it happened. She and I were on our way to watch a tournament together, but then this guy came from out of nowhere. He shot at us and broke her jaw. She carried me back home, and then... She left that night. I didn't learn about what happened to her until just after getting accepted into Beacon. She... She went on a rampage and then... Then she...

Jaune: (Holds her) Hey, hey. It's okay, Pyrrha. I'm... I'm sorry to hear that. I'm... I'm sure she was a great mom.

Pyrrha: (Sniffles) She was the best. And, on the bright side, because of her, there's a new standard for huntsman and huntresses to follow. And she's part of the reason why I became a huntress. So I could make sure everyone follows the standard. Follows the example she set. (Smiles) I think she would have liked you.

Jaune: (Looks at family photo) I think I would have like her, too.

Fun Fact! In the first ten years of the 20th century, until her death in 1907, the Champawat Tiger, also known as "the man-eater" killed and ate 436 humans in western Nepal. She evaded capture and continued to kill until she was shot by British hunter Jim Corbett, who speculated the tigress lost her teeth years ago from a gunshot, forcing her to change her prey to much easier humans. He then went on to be an advocate for wild tigers and spent the latter years of his life devoted to their conservation, even having a conservation park in Nepal dedicated to him.

[edmcmayonnaise]

Months ago, I wrote "biographies" for Edwin and Simon in the style of the Edwardian (Third Edition published in 1915) study on "Sexual Inversion" (medical phrasing that pre-dates the term "homosexuality") in the style of Studies in the Psychology of Sex by Havelock Ellis. This book can be found for free online and is a treasure trove due to the collection of biographies written by queer people.

Maybe against my better judgment, I will share them now for Simon Appreciation Week, as they capture to some extent how I perceive their interpersonal dynamics.

HISTORY E.P. - English, student at public boarding school, aged 16. His father, who comes from an unremarkable middle class lineage, is a physician. His father has been deployed to France since 1914 for wartime service. His mother’s family has a history notable for hysteria in his maternal grandmother, and his mother he describes as a high-strung and nervous woman who herself has been intermittently institutionalized for afflictions of mood. 

He has no siblings, and describes the relationship with his parents as distant. He lived most of his early childhood life in the care of a nanny. At age seven, was sent away to boarding school. 

He has never been attracted to girls or women, though had minimal contact with girls his age, He takes little interest in women or in their society. There is nothing markedly feminine in his general appearance, but he does believe that his general kinesthetic disposition is not viewed by others as manly. Specifically, he says that he is concerned that the animated way in which his hands is too recognizable as a symptom of what he considers to be his congenital condition. 

He is of average height and medium-slim build, but generally normatively developed and healthy. He considers himself to lack skill in athletic pursuits with the exception of fencing, but is an omnivorous reader and excels in academics. 

In his own words:

“I have always been very shy of showing any affectionate tendencies. Most of my acquaintances (and close friends, even) find me curiously cold. For obvious reasons I have been unable to speak as to why this is. I fear being cruelly misunderstood, and I have at times felt as if wrestling in the folds of the morally reprehensible python of inversion.

"I find myself cut off from others, feel myself to be an outcast, and, amongst others my age, am intensely withdrawn. Privately, I am miserable. The desire to love and be loved is hard to drown, especially when treading through a veritable pool of ‘what-ifs’ as I am surrounded by male virality in all aspects of my life at school.

“I am not sure entirely what it is for which I am longing. Certainly, my parents neglected to impart to me any sort of knowledge of the adult modus vivendi. The only thing I do know with confidence is that no bodily satisfaction should be sought at the cost of another person’s distress or degradation, including my own.

“At my school, I have heard rumor, and in fact been the subject of rumor, regarding attachments and gratifications with other boys, which are all untrue. As with any topic that is discussed only behind cupped hands and in whispers, the stories become more and more fantastical as they are shared from schoolmate to schoolmate. Upon my truest promise, I have never yielded to the temptation of any sort of intercrural connection. I have preserved strict chastity. I do not know how long my mind can hold back the instincts of my heart and body, but I am terrified that I will soon lose this seemingly never ending battle.”

Shortly after E.P. submitted his history for publication in this book, it was reported that he and several other boys at his school went missing in what the school is calling an Act of God. Any additional information about what may have happened to this youth and his friends is not forthcoming at this time. 

~

HISTORY S.M. - English, student at a public boarding school, aged 17. Father and mother both living; the latter is of a better social standing than the former. He is much attached to his mother, and she gives him some sympathy and companionship, when he is at home. He is the third of four siblings, all boys, and he suspects that his next elder brother is also inverted.

In early life, S.M. was of delicate constitution and his studies were often interrupted by illness. Though living under mostly happy conditions he was shy and nervous, often depressed. This he attributes to having been on several occasions mishandled by his next elder brother; concedes that his brother is prone to foul and violent moods. However, his brother is well-liked, by his father and other siblings, he says, because of his masculine character. His brother has many friends at school. Though S.M. does report that he does have some influence over some of his classmates, he has few close friends.

Of his inversion, he reports the following:

“There is a boy in my year who has become the absorbing thought of my school days, and who comes to me in my dreams almost nightly. I have absolutely no words to tell you how powerfully his beauty affects me. He is well-formed, lean, shy, and in my dream he sits beside me, allowing our legs to touch and for me to caress his thigh. He looks at me with desire in his eyes, green, but clouded over dark with his want for me to kiss him. And I do want to kiss him– on his wrist, and his palm, and into the gentle, milky curve of his neck, and to leave my lover’s mark on him, to say to anyone who might pursue him that he is mine and mine only. 

“I keep my feelings hidden, however, hardly daring to look at him for fear of being found out. His bed is next to mine, and the rest of the dormitory is boisterous and lewd, and there is a good deal of bullying, which I cannot bear to have directed my way.

“I have tried to tell myself that these dreams are not due to a moral failing of my own, but indeed this boy’s own influence upon me. I love him and I resent him. His seeming indifference towards my existence, as he has never responded well when I have plucked up my courage to speak with him, angers me. I want him to look towards me and love me, too.”

S.M. was involved in the same incident as E.P.,  where he and several other boys went missing from their school. It is reported that their last known whereabouts were their school dormitory rooms.

[casualcannibalisms]

k so i just remembered the post that inspired this one, so im gonna mark down the other points they made about how toa being set 10 years later would fix everything, and why i think it would've actually made everything worse, but im not doing it on THAT post bc its abt reyna and she deserves to have a post to herself

percy and anabeth need a break??? percy's mother is in toa more than him! he is in like, two scenes. annabeth is a mentioned character but she's not there! they are getting a break!

would explain why the other characters aren't there is the final point. they are??? they just aren't going on apollo's quest??? they are there for a few chapters, or maybe the whole book, but you need an explanation for why they aren't jumping on a life threatening quest beyond "they are teenagers, who have school and lives, and are willing to help out a little bit but not for the whole thing?" is that not enough for you? that they're teenagers trying to finish their last years of high school?

WHY I THINK PUTTING IT 10 YEARS LATER WOULD MAKE THE TIME LINE WORSE

Python was already established as a threat at the end of hoo. was already in delphi. the 6 months that apollo was missing was such a big thing because it made python stronger the longer it was there. making toa take 10 years in the future makes it so apollo was missing for 10 years, which means that Python was in charge of delphi for 10 years. why should we be worried about python after that? its not like anyone in cannon cared if they waited 10 years to have apollo handle it cared.

Nero, Commodus, and Caligula are working with python to topple Olympus, and have been helping chronus and the giants in a "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" way, with the express idea to back stab them after they won, when that didn't work, they were going to do it themselves. and they proved very good at it in toa, capturing almost all of apollo's oracles and taking down communications within months of apollo going missing. not only that, but also they partner with taraquin to decimate new rome with the zombies i mentioned in the linked post. again, months after apollo goes missing. doing any of this goes a decade later kinda kills their intimidation factor. why not take the chance of Olympus being weakened from not having one of their 12 missing? that decision would have to be explained.

the whole reason that no one really wants to go with apollo is like... hello, they're still rebuilding from the war they just had? and no one knows whats going on with new rome bc they cant contact with each other? because communications are down? and new rome cant justify sending an actual messenger to chb because, you know, the zombies and the war combined kinda fucked up their population stats. it'd be a suicide mission to send someone.

so like

no, making toa happen 10 years later wouldn't fix anything.

also, why did they put that post in the lester papadopoulos tag when he's not mentioned but they dont tag reyna when she's literally someone they're calling out for <i>"not doing enough"</i> for new rome?

[max1461]

biden trump pretrump posttrump democracts republicans elite university cancel culture twitter yimby nimby affirmative action rent control. we didnt start the fire leftist rightists liberals grey tribe what about this? what about... oh right. ais and other tech things will come along and make everything not matter. we should do vague technocratic liberalism for two decades and then ai will turn us all into immortal simulated minds or maybe replace all labor. it's probably not important to update social structures in light of that sea change we should keep doing like technocratic market liberalism even though the very concept of like man's place in the world is about to be. yeah that makes sense did you know that affirmative action is going to undo the industrial revolution? because diversity hires won't know how to operate the machines yeah. yeah the fall of the west is coming and china is going to put all american males in those sperm machines from the porn video but we should pretty much do centrist technocratic liberalism until then. and make a really big army to kill china when they show up wait I just thought of something. I forgot what it was but the world isn't very stable it's about to change drastically according to my thing that I believe in. yeah that usually doesn't happen I know but this time my thing that I am all worried about is gonna come and get us soon but instead of preparing for that I think we should sort of do centrist technocratic liberalism kind of as if the world was gonna keep chugging along for another few centuries kind of as if everything is business as normal wait not to make the point too on the nose but I think that's cognitive dissonance. I think if you really thought trump was hitler 3 you probably would act different than you're acting I think probably if you thought uh, whatever, I think. Well I don't know what's in your head but I don't think you.

Right so look at all of it right. Not just in a caricatured way but really look at all of it. It's just been going along, right? I mean it's just been chugging along. I'm glad I don't live in 1500s france but I probably would have been fine. I mean maybe I would have got depressed because I believe in too strict a religion but I'm depressed right now. Maybe I would have died sooner but I'm gonna die anyway, I've only got 80 years anyway. What if I lived in the soviet union? I like freedom of speech but on the other hand who cares. I would have got a job and been fine. Sucks that I can't voice my opinions and shit but on the other hand whatever.

You'll be fucking fine everybody's been fine forever. You'll be fucking fine. You uh, you treat everything as business as usual because at some level. Shit is just how it is you know. I mean there's the monty python caricature of the middle ages where they all ate dirty and shit but in the real middle ages they woke up did some hard work on the farm had sex with each other died of dysentery you're gonna die of some nasty shit that will be viewed as barbaric in the future too. "Yeah but that's a bad thing!!!" too bad it's your fate. The lot of every human ever you everybody before and everybody after is to figure out how to live in a world that kind of is not going to be nice to you. And your big world ending thing is not gonna happen it's just gonna be, wake up pay taxes get sick maybe find love like it's been for everyone forever that's all there is to it. Political regimes and technological systems come and go but eating and fucking and dying and hopefully making friends is forever. There's no point in thinking about the grand story of humanity unless you're an academic it doesn't mean anything or do anything. This post is very not fully endorsed but on the other hand I think this is the corrective most people here need. Don't worry about this shit just try to make some friends and not die too bad, that's all any of us will ever have.

[satureja13]

Dayn has to leave soon, his clients are hungry and waiting for him. Jeb and Kiyoshi quickly dragged him over to the astrometrics lab, where they'd stored Vlad and Ji Ho's meteorites, to ask him if he knows anything about their strange behaviour - only to find out that they now even started to float ö.Ö' And Dayn has no idea either what might have caused the glowing and floating stuff...

He also delivered their mail to the security office. A few letters form a certain Jasmine Holiday? Jeb: "I don't think we know her? Is this spam?" Dayn: "Uh - maybe? I've delivered quite a few of them." Jeb will check them later.

And when Dayn just wanted to head to the bridge, he sensed that this odd sensation, he noticed since he came on board, grew stronger again. Dayn: "Do you mind if I make a quick scan? There is something unusual here..." Saiwa: "Sure, go on."

Little Goat to Little Goat: 'Omg! They are going to find the Romantium!' Little Goat: 'Oh no! They are going to take it away!' Little Goat: 'Ach! And we had so much fun with it...' Little Goat: 'At least we have the hot tub now.' Little Goat: 'But who's going to use it without the Romantium?' Little Goat: 'Ach dammit!'

Dayn: "The source is in the engine room, let's take a look."

Dayn: "This is a Romantium ore. Why did you put it beneath the ventilation? It's permeating the whole ship. Oh, I see! Clever!" *Dayn winked at Saiwa* Saiwa: "A Romantium ore? I don't know why it's here. Strange. Though - I noticed something was... uh 'encouraging' us ^^' " Dayn, eagerly: "If you want to get rid of it?" The Little Goats stepped into Dayn's way, a hostile look on their cute little faces.

Saiwa shooed them back to the meadow and looked at the ore. It has potential... Saiwa: "Oh, that won't be necessary. We can handle it." Dayn laughed: "I see."

Vlad and Jack at the bridge overheard them. Vlad: "You know something about that ore?" Jack: "Why do you ask me?" Vlad: "Do you?" Jack: "Eh... I found it beyond the veil. The lightning that hit me left it behind. And I kind of know about its eh - romanticizing effect. But I didn't put it under the ventilation! I swear!" Vlad hissed: "And I swear - one day..." All that kissing and stuff with Ji Ho. It just happened because of that ore?

Luckily Dayn came upstairs just in time to show them which button to push to ignite the beacon so they can be found by the outpost, should they get lost.

Jack's finger hovered over the button: "It's this one, right?"

Dayn: "Yes. But don't get so close to it. There is only one beacon. If you accidentally push it and you get lost afterwards - you're really lost... The outpost won't find you and no one will know where you are because the GPS still doesn't work. Just let the autopilot follow that detour to the outpost - and don't push that button if it isn't necessary." Jack:

(Iconic scene above is from Guardians of the Galaxy 2) Then it's time to say farewell to Dayn. He hugged Lenny one last time: "Good luck Boys! Take good care of our Lenny!" The Little Goats were so glad he's finally leaving and that the Romantium's going to stay: 'That was close! Let's hide it before they get a grip on it!'

'The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding In all of the directions it can whizz As fast as it can go, of the speed of light, you know Twelve million miles a minute and that's the fastest speed there is

So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure How amazingly unlikely is your birth And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere out in space 'Cause it's bugger all down here on Earth'

Galaxy Song from Monty Python's 'The Meaning of Life'

From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: starts ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-29

[ladybugreviews]

The secret session listening party from Hell: Opus

Mark Anthony Green’s feature directorial debut Opus adds very little newness to the oversaturated market of cult-focused psychological thrillers, but it tells a tired story better than most. Anyone who has seen more than two of said thriller or horror films in the last seven-odd years will recognize hints of Midsommar, Get Out, or even The Menu in Opus, which stars Ayo Edebiri and John Malkovich alongside Juliette Lewis, Murray Bartlett, Amber Midthunder, Young Mazino, Stephanie Suganami, and Tatanka Means. I don’t mean to imply that Opus is better than the three aforementioned films—in fact, it is decidedly weaker—but it’s much better than some of the other cult-related social commentary psychological thrillers that come out every year like clockwork. 

Ayo Edebiri and John Malkovich were fantastic as a plucky journalist and eccentric musician, respectively, but the supporting casts’ characters were underdeveloped in favor of allowing Edebiri’s and Malkovich’s performances to drive the narrative. They certainly did, but with such a strong supporting cast, it did the whole film a disservice. Still, Edebiri’s near-comical facial expressions and down-to-earth performance kept the familiar plot feeling fresh and for once, we get a final girl who actually seems to think with her head. Malkovich was, in a word, chilling. Somehow both magnetic and repulsive, he played the perfect torturing artist. Maybe the pop-star-to-cult-leader phenomenon is one we need to fear a little more in this age of parasocial relationships.

The overall plot and themes of the movie called to mind that one quote from The Dark Knight: Either you die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. 

As the story unfolds and we get a glimpse behind all of Malkovich’s character Alfred Moretti’s postulating and python-skin boots, we begin to understand how he has become the person he is—and how Edebiri’s Ariel Ecton could go down the very same path. While the dialogue is fine and, at times, even funny, all of Moretti’s discussion of the focus of Levelism—his cult—gets confused as the film tries to tell us everything, rather than show us.

Aside from Edebiri’s and Malkovich’s performances, the best parts of Opus are the cinematography and the original music, written by Nile Rodgers and The-Dream. Adding the music was a particularly strong choice, actually; without it to break up the clunky monologues, the film would have dragged on unforgivably. Aside from the original songs, however, the soundtrack was the same dissonant violin that plagues every single horror or thriller of the last decade or more. For god’s sake, there are other instruments you can use to build tension. 

The open-endedness of thriller endings can either work for or against a given film. This time, it worked. In the last ten or so minutes, that feeling of being watched that never quite leaves Ariel after she escapes Moretti’s estate comes together in an unsettling but satisfying way. In this rare case, I found myself wanting there to be more to the story—I did actually care enough to want to know what would happen next. 

As far as feature directorial debuts go, this could have been significantly worse but it fits into its niche nicely. Though it’s not as strong as other cult-centered thrillers or horror movies, it’s certainly not a waste of time either. Green could and should have taken more risks, especially because it felt like he got scared of standing apart from similar films and became just another voice in the crowd as a result, but Opus had great original music and fun performances from a fantastic cast. I look forward to seeing what Green—and, of course, the rest of the cast—will do next.

If you liked Opus, you might enjoy: Midsommar (2019), Get Out (2017), or The Menu (2022).

Ladybug rating: 3.5/5 stars.

[demigod-shenanigans]

"I can go into why i dislike ToA (especially Tyrant's Tomb is. a book that exists) but box of pandora. Once open good luck shutting me up" (source: your tags)

Now that you said that, i'm geniunely curious. Open the box. I dare you

This should be obvious but @ the people who really enjoyed ToA, this post is not for you. I’m not sure I’ll even tag it because this is mostly me venting into the void because two people asked and not me wanting to ruin other people’s fun. These are just my personal opinions.

I also apologize if I get any details wrong, I did recheck a lot of the things mentioned but it’s been a minute since I read ToA and might not remember everything 100% correctly. Also, obvious spoiler warning.

*claps hands together* Okay, you asked for this but heads up, it’s going to be long. Maybe grab a snack and a glass of water beforehand.

My beef with ToA can be summarized into a few key points that I’ll elaborate on below but basically:

-It tries to wrap up character arcs for some of the seven (and Reyna) but does this through the eyes of someone with zero context and also treats these characters arcs as unimportant footnotes in the larger story

-Jason’s death and everything surrounding it was handled extremely poorly.

-I cannot remember any demigods staying mad at Apollo. Redemption arcs should not mean everyone has to forgive this character for all the shit they’ve done in the past.

-The death toll. This is not helped by the fact that a lot of the deaths feel like they exist solely for the purpose of making Apollo learn death sucks over and over again (Jason is the worst example of this, but there are others)

More grievances I have but don’t have enough to say about to justify a longer explanation:

-There are a whole bunch of new minor characters on top of the old ones already struggling for screen time. I don’t remember much about any of them, which is a shame because the idea behind some of them is really compelling.

-The story is centered around the Triumvirate as antagonists, with Python as a final boss, but book four just dumps an additional antagonist on you out of nowhere? Why?

-Reyna rejecting Apollo is nice and all but I still had to put up with him crushing on her and was very uncomfortable the whole time.

-Chiron sends a bunch of new demigods into what’s potentially a death battle and tells them it’s a fun field trip (what the fuck)

-This is a personal grievance more than anything but it took me ages (book five) until I really got attached to Meg. I feel like that could have been fixed if she at least got a few POV chapters.

-Dishonorable mention to the punch line joke. Two whole camps of people lining up to hit the canonically abused kid that saved them is not funny.

Details under the cut (Pandora’s box, I did warn you)

Character arcs:

The books really do try to tell meaningful stories for people whose arcs weren’t finished in Heroes of Olympus. With some of them, you can even tell the ideas behind wrapping up those arcs were solid. But the books also tells those stories through the eyes of a character who doesn’t know these people’s pasts and quite frankly doesn’t care a lot of the time. People will voice/do something that is huge for their character and instead of going into that it’s followed up with some random Apollo anecdote that’s only tangentially related at best.

Taking Leo as an example: Apollo has no idea why Leo settling down and finding a home somewhere after everything he’s been through is meaningful. That’s a story that could have been the focus of an entire book of its own, but instead it’s just a side plot to a completely different story. And that story really should have been told through Leo’s eyes, or at least through the eyes of someone like Jason or Piper who realize why this is huge for him.

Apollo also does not care why Leo and Calypso are fighting, so it’s not something that’s properly explored. Leo’s fights with Calypso are mainly mentioned/witnessed. You get some guesses as to how they started but they never mention the exact reasons. They both say they care about each other, but only to Apollo, when the other person isn’t present. When they sort things out it happens largely off-screen. I was also not a fan of the way many of their issues ended up being pinned on Leo being sexist when it was actually way more than that.

ToA does this a lot. It gives arcs to characters who honestly deserved to be explored more, but those arcs are barely footnotes in a larger story where these characters just cameo for a hundred or so pages.

The cameo stuff works okay for Percy and Solangelo because the books are very aware they’re cameos and they get to have fun but this is not their story. But the characters the series tries to give proper plots to are all over the place.

It’s said that Jason and Thalia are really close but they never interact in the books. Jason had a bit of a chance at a normal life finally but that’s barely gone into. (More on Jason later because my god did how the books handled him piss me off massively)

Piper’s struggles with her queerness get the random Apollo anecdote treatment. There’s some stuff about her reconnecting with her dad and her heritage but that’s not explored a ton either.

Frank’s firewood burns up and he’s fine, which is just sort of hand-waved and doesn’t feel meaningful, especially because I think the fireproof pouch was already a fine solution? Congrats on being free of this, now you can get stabbed to death like all the other characters, I guess.

Reyna gets a sort of arc but it feels really weird because it happens almost entirely off-screen. She spends a large fraction of the book chiding Lavinia for leaving her post, then gets her leg broken, is off-screen for a while and then just DIPS with the Hunters after her home suffered huge casualties.

I also think her joining the Hunters is a super lame way to resolve her arc in general (she just lays down one responsibility to sign up for the next, and a character not wanting romance/not wanting romance right now should be allowed to exist without having to join the eternal maiden’s club, but that problem isn’t isolated to Reyna and could honestly be a whole post of its own)

This also comes down to the fact that I’m here mainly for the demigods. I care about these kids having good arcs and good lives. I care significantly less about Apollo having to learn really obvious shit like “murdering my pregnant girlfriend was perhaps a little messed up”

Jason’s death and everything surrounding it

Killing off a major character (especially one whose arc isn’t finished) can be a plot twist that works at times. But it has to be handled well. Doing it to a character that’s suffered horrifically and is starting to heal is also a hugely shitty move, but I understand you want meaningful deaths for the plot sometimes.

But you cannot do it the way Rick did it with Jason’s death. If he was going to kill off one of the seven, he should have done it in Heroes of Olympus, with that character narrating and their friends getting to deal with the aftermath and grieve.

Instead, Jason dies in a book that he appears in for like. A hundred pages iirc? Two-hundred at most? You get Apollo narration on it, and sure, he’s big sad about it, but he also knew this guy for two days.

Piper gets a few pages to deal with his death, then disappears from the book and comes back for a heroic rescue later. Leo gets like two pages to deal with the fact that his best friend is dead. They then proceed to fuck off to Oklahoma instead of going to the funeral. For what reason? No idea. The book doesn’t bother to explain it.

Jason gets a Camp Jupiter funeral, with none of his Camp Half-Blood friends present, because fuck the fact that him belonging to both camps was a huge part of his arc, right?

Piper and Leo know Jason is dead but they cannot be there because they’d already used up their time as ToA side characters, I guess. Percy and Annabeth can’t come, they don’t find out due to demigod communication issues until the end of the series. Thalia also doesn’t get to go to her brother’s funeral. She doesn’t find out until the funeral is already over. We don’t even really get to see her grieving, her finding out Jason died happens off-screen too.

Because this is the Apollo show, Apollo is the guy who leads the funeral procession instead of, like, Reyna, who knew Jason for years.

Also, for some reason, the person avenging Jason is Frank? Absolutely no offense to Frank, he’s a great guy and I’m sure he cared about Jason, but that choice still feels deeply comedic considering I can remember exactly one meaningful interaction him and Jason had in HoO (Jason giving Frank praetor position at the end of HoH) and not a single conversation they had beyond that. If Rick had to write Leo and Piper out of the plot, why not at least have Reyna avenge him?

Jason dies specifically because Apollo broke a stupid oath he made on the River Styx. We’re told that people around him will keep dying because of this. He dies as a chess piece in a stupid game between gods, for the sake of Apollo’s character development. He dies so he can be brought up every hundred pages for Apollo to waffle about how sad his death was but how he’d also definitely not want to be brought back (I get it, we cannot revive people constantly, but having Apollo make this point when, again, he knew the guy for two days, is still really stupid. Nico also gets to make the same point at the end just in case the reader didn’t understand before that we’re not bringing Jason back)

Apollo is forgiven by everyone

Related to the above point. Like I said, we’re outright told that Jason dying is a direct consequence of Apollo’s oath. Apollo also knew taking them along on the mission would get Jason or Piper killed and he did it anyway.

Piper gets to be mad at him very briefly, but when he tries to apologize at the end of the book, she interrupts him and tells him “it’s fine” (her voice is described as “no anger, just natural heat”)

Thalia doesn’t get to be mad at him at all. Her baby brother died and she just pats Apollo on the back and tells him “it’s fine, Jason made his own choices. That’s what heroes do.” And then it’s made about how Artemis lost Apollo when he got transformed into a human instead of. Like. The fact that Thalia just lost her baby brother for the second time in her life.

IT’S FINE?? THAT’S ALL ANYONE HAS TO SAY ABOUT THIS??

Hell, Apollo even has a sort of dream hallucination of Jason’s ghost so that ghost can forgive him too.

Was that really necessary? Why do people think that a character learning to be better means absolutely everyone has to forgive them? Wouldn’t it have been a better sticking point for a god to learn people are allowed to stay mad at you?

The death toll

A lot of people die in these books. People dying in pjo books has always been a thing, but it’s never felt this pointless or this much like it was solely happening for a single person’s character development.

Jason is the most pointed example of this, but there are more. Starting with the fact that two of Apollo’s kids almost get torched in front of his face in the first book (Austin and Kayla) and somehow that is not a sticking point. I don’t think it’s ever brought up again afterwards.

Other characters that die so Apollo can learn death sucks:

-Several Dryads die saving the grove of Dodonna

-Heloise the Griffin

-One random unnamed demigod in Dark Prophecy (mentioning them because that’s where it occurs to Apollo demigod deaths also suck)

-Money Maker (Dryad)

-Crest

-Harpocrates and the Sybil of Cumae

The death toll in Tyrant’s Tomb is completely ridiculous. Like, “feels worse than Last Olympian despite not even being the final battle”-ridiculous. And unlike how Percy at least gets to use that tragic battle to change things in a fundamental way, the Camp Jupiter demigods don’t win anything significant. Their home is only almost completely destroyed. Some of them aren’t dead. That’s it.

If you remember the name of any side character Camp Jupiter demigod from HoO, there’s a very high chance they die in this book.

We don’t get exact numbers for how many people die. The book actually explicitly refuses to give numbers, stating “We didn’t count the dead. They weren’t numbers. They were people we had know, friends we had fought with.” (Which gets even more ironic due to the fact that, again, we barely have any named CJ demigods to begin with)

The closest thing we get to numbers are that 25 demigod members of the legion died in the battle before the book started, and towards the end there are fourteen total demigods still standing of the first to third cohort combined. Even if half the missing demigods are “just” so severely wounded that they can’t fight anymore, that’s still 60 dead kids! The pre-book battle was mentioned to have been hardest on the civilians. We don’t know how many of them died, and losses among the fourth and fifth cohort are also unknown, but that is a ridiculous amount of losses. Why are there so many dead kids in this book and why are we all just supposed to be okay with this?

Jupiter explicitly forbids the other gods to intervene. The only one who does is Diana, after an offering, and she takes her sweet time to get there. That camp is named after the guy! That’s people’s kids down there! I know the gods not helping their kids isn’t exactly new, but this is on a whole other level.

There are funerals but those are largely skipped over, and Frank announces that they’ll resolve this by asking Lupa to bring in more demigods so they’ll come back stronger, which. Baffling statement. Let’s just fix the dead people by replacing them.

TL;DR: Good on Apollo for learning to be better, but I really didn’t like how it was done. There were a handful of things I liked in almost all the books, not including Tyrant’s Tomb which wins the award for rrverse book I most wanted to chuck out of a window. Some of the ideas were good. I think the first and last book are mostly solid (largely due to the fact that those don’t try to shove in entire side character arcs). But the things I did enjoy just get very heavily outweighed by everything that annoyed and upset me.

I really wish ToA had been mostly new characters with maybe some minor cameos, and other people’s arcs had been saved for different books. I also think splitting the perspective between Apollo, Meg and maybe the HoO character who was trying to have an arc in that specific book would have helped.

[one-idea]

I’ve been thinking about my Zoro Arc and I need to work out the villain. I know one is going to be a devil fruit user that is attacking Zoro’s old dojo/village. (The secondary villain is Koushiro Zoro’s old Sensei but I’m still deciding if he is an antagonist or a straight villain)

Part 1

Part 2

I want it to feel like a real arc with an enemy that is a threat. So I know I want the devil fruit user to have a zoan fruit. More specifically a mythical Zoan fruit. And I know I want them to be almost impossible to cut.

So where do you go when you need a monster? DnD monster manual of course! And I have some ideas.

We got two camps of thought humanoid monster and monster monsters

We will start off with the humanoids

First we have the death knight

This ideas actually wouldn’t be a zoan but would have a fruit like Brook that keeps him alive. Maybe he’s an old member of the shimotsuki family and is angry with Koushiro’s actions (his desire to hand of the soon to Zoro, someone out side of the family/giving Zoro the sword, and maybe the murder of Kuina👀 I’m really starting to lean into the idea that Koushiro killed his daughter)

This would mean that not only does Koushiro want to take Wado Ichimonji from Zoro but so does the creature he came to fight.

With an armor class of 20 and hit points of 180 it makes the. Near impossible to hit and hard to whittle down their health. It would be a long fight

The second camp is monster monster

First you have a Behir

They are creatures that are a mix between centipedes and crocodiles that can breath lighting.

I really like them because it means Luffy has an advantage against their lightning breath like he did in Skypia. But they are also known to physically coil around their victims like a python and consume them whole so he’s not completely safe.

Its armor class is 17 and hit points 168. A hard beast to fight but not impossible.

Second is the Bulette

They are known as land sharks and are massive predators that live to feed. They are tunnelers digging underground and popping back up.

With an armor class of 17 and hit points of 94 they are hard to hit but easy to take down if you can get some hard hits in.

And finally you have the Tarrasque

Tarrasques are crazy with armor class of 25 and a hit point of 676. Almost nothing can hit them and even if you did you would barely damage them.

Like I almost don’t want to uses it because of how broken it is. The thing is 50 feet tall and is known for its legendary destruction. Like it might actually be to hard to fight.

What do you guys think. I really like the Behir or a Death Knight.

I want the crew to have to fight while Zoro is also going through it emotionally. His job is to protect the crew. But the crew is here because of him. Fighting one of the craziest things they’ve seen. It’s not going down no matter what they do. The crew is getting hurt.

And the person who called him here is acting like Zoro, and more importantly Zoro’s crew aren’t worth dirt because they are pirates. Normally Zoro wouldn’t care, but they came here because Zoro was honoring his teacher and his friends memory, and now Luffy and the others are in danger.

(Top this off with the realization of how Kuina died, and the person Koushiro actually is and it will be fantastic) (like I said I’m really starting to lean into “twist villain” Koushiro.

[ceratosaurtalks]

Is there such thing as a "Beginner Snake"?

This is a topic Ive talked to a lot of people about. A lot of different breeders, and a lot of long-term keepers. When you think 'Beginner snake' A lot of the species that come to mind are things like Corn snakes, Ball pythons, Kingsnakes, ect. And a lot of people feel limited based on their experience and the false connotation that these species are really the only species that they can get based on care requirements.

However, it is widely agreed up that this really isn't true? Yes some species are easier to keep than others. Yes, some species should only be kept by advanced keepers who know how to handle animals that don't have room for mistakes. But there are other species beyond the most common sp. Available on the market that might be better suited for someone.

The issue with 'Beginner snakes' Isn't that they're particularly hard to keep. All snakes have their 'problems' and Quirks, I.E Balls are known for going on long hunger strikes if their husbandry isn't up to standards and in extreme cases, that means assist feeding which a lot of people are uncomfortable with. The problem often comes from the keeper getting an animal that they will rapidly loose interest in and rehome or neglect within a few years. Ive been open about this but I've taken in a lot of rehomes of various quality and health in my time, and if you follow me from Discord you've probably seen some pictures of some of my more... Unique, rehomes Ive picked up in the past.

When it comes to choosing your first pet snake you should figure out what you want and what you're expecting out of your animal. I think in my year of keeping, the best things you should ask yourself are these:

Do I want an animal I can take out and chill with? That won't be moving around a whole bunch? Or do I want an animal to that is more active, that will be interesting to Handle but won't typically sit still?

Do I want an animal that I can handle in the first place? Does handling play a factor for me? What is my budget? What is the reasonable sized space I can set aside for an animal that I want? What kind of temperament do I expect out of my animal? Do I want a display animal? Do I want an animal I can watch move about its enclosure and be active or do I want an animal I don't mind seeing a whole lot of?

Ultimately, different sp. Of snakes are vastly different from each other. And these behaviors *can and will* change based off the husbandry you're providing them. If you have a big empty enclosure with a hide or two and maybe a singular piece of decor, yeah, your BP is probably going to be a pet rock. They're semi-arboreal and Nocturnal, give them lots of climbing opportunities and cover and they'll be more inclined to explore.

King snakes and Milksnakes are a joy to handle and a even bigger joy to feed. I've kept Honduran Milks and Ive shared pictures of my Honduran Milks, theyre super active, always on the move, and when it comes to feeding sometimes I make them work for their food because they will peruse prey. A lot of Kingsnakes are the same way.

And beyond that, there are other sp. of animals that are not unreasonable for someone starting out to keep. Childrens Pythons are a *fantastic* sp. Of snake to get into and can be full of spunky personality. And if you want something that's an absolute treat to interact with, the Rosie Boa might be the best thing for you!

Theres tons. And I do mean tons. Of available sp. of Reptiles out there for you to enjoy. Find one thats going to fit your needs that isn't completely unreasonable, and research into it before you make any decisions for yourself. I cant stress this enough: Always do your research!

There is tons and tons of misinformation and outdated information about Herp keeping. There are people who will lie to you about an animals care to make a sale. The best thing you can do for yourself and for your animal is to *not* get all your information from one source. Use multiple credited sources. Join actual communities of keepers and private breeders and talk to them about their experiences and how they do things. Find forums, join discords or (vetted, trustworthy) Facebook communities. Watch some Youtube videos from (respected) content creators. Take a look on Morph Market, browse through whats commonly available.

This isn't to encourage you to do something stupid. No ones first snake should be a Hot(Medically-significant Venomous animal), or a unreasonable giant like a Reticulated Python. Just be reasonable, and don't be afraid to reach out to people and ask questions.

Tl;dr: Yes and no, there are animals that are easier to keep than other and some animals that are unreasonable to start with. But, whats more important is making sure whatever animal you pick is a good match for you as an individual and not because its the 'easiest'.

[mother-of-houseplants-2]

pets i think the gallagher siblings would have post s11

this is such a ridiculous thing to fixate on but i literally can’t stop thinking about it and i need to write it all down lol

fiona:

i think it would take fiona a while to get to the point in her life where she could stomach caring for a pet, but when she did, it would be a dog. seeing her bond with rusty really makes me think she’d be such a good dog mom! especially since she’s such an anxious, high energy person; having a dog would force her into a healthier routine for herself, give her built-in ways to handle stress (running!), and just be so good for her mentally.

i definitely think fi would go to her local animal shelter and find the dog that’s been there the longest, the one no one else wants, and take it home. whether it’s the lil baby who’s sick/injured, ‘too old’ for people, the momma who’s depressed and doesn’t want to play because her babies all got adopted, the abused dog who’s reactive and nervous — fiona doesn’t care. she knows the feeling of being alone and scared and hurt all too well. she ends up adopting a giant, terrified baby of a dog (pittie maybe?) who needs special care because of a disability and they are thick as thieves immediately.

fiona would be such a good pet owner and so fiercely protective over her (she relates a little too much to being seen as “dangerous,” “chaos,” etc. when she’s just hurt and needs love) but so so so nervous she’s doing it all wrong. cue six months of frantic googling and stress smoking by the window so the dog doesn’t breathe in the smoke. but she does a great job, and the baby is so happy with her. maybe a little too happy; she demands to sit in fi’s lap at every given opportunity, and absolutely crushes her and liam under her weight when flopping down onto them for cuddles. they adore her. she adores them. they spoil her rotten, but she deserves it.

lip:

i see lip as a snake dude! he’d say he adopted a snake because it makes him look badass and cool, but really he just thinks they’re so interesting and pretty. plus, they’re bioengineering marvels! he was probably obsessed with them as a kid, and read those little creepy crawly books on them out loud to ian before bedtime (before fiona made him stop because it freaked ian out too much).

he gets a corn snake at first, and it’s the sweetest, cuddliest thing ever. most mornings when he’s getting freddie’s lunch packed and ready for elementary school and brewing coffee and combing his hair, the snake’s just chilling around his neck and hanging out. literally lol. it’s also so gentle and playful with freddie, who pets it like it’s a cat. a few years later, lip gets a ball python who is an absolute asshole. it is also, unfortunately, his favorite. tami says it’s because they’re so similar. lip insists it’s because he always falls for people who are mean to them, so tami takes to calling it the missus. it’s a whole thing.

i think tami would also push for getting a dog/a more “traditional” pet, which lip would be just fine with. the snakes live mainly in his office, anyway, so it’s not a problem. lip likes the dog, and loves watching freddie play with it, but it’ll never be as cool as his snakes.

ian:

i think ian and mickey would get a cat. maybe multiple! their first cat would be the scrungliest, meanest, bitchiest little one-eyed, flea-bitten asshole known to man who takes forever to warm up to them, but finally settles in after lots of bribery and cuddles and trust. he would bond more with mickey (maybe because of their kindred assholery?) and ian would be secretly so damn jealous. unfortunately, however, its the cutest thing he’s ever seen. so the cat gets a pass.

they’d get another cat after mickey starts insisting that their first little baby is getting lonely. ian thinks they should be thinking about adopting a human baby instead, but mickey isn’t quite ready yet. so they take in the tiniest cotton ball of a kitten ever, who grows immediately and inextricably attached to ian. he instantly lords it over mickey, who’s just happy to see his husband so enamored with the little floof (who ends up huge!).

when they adopt their first child, they think the first cat will have more trouble than the second, but they’re dead wrong. the tiny asshole is obsessed with the baby and won’t stop grooming them and purring at them and standing guard over the crib. the fluffy white cat is terrified and steers clear whenever the baby cries. mickey thinks it’s hilarious. ian has a picture of his husband, child, and two cats napping together on the couch as his screen saver.

debbie:

another one i feel strongly about: debbie and franny are spider girlies! franny decides one day that they’re her favorite animals, and debbie is thrilled because she and carl were the only gallagher siblings who weren’t afraid of them as kids and they feel special to her. (maybe fiona has arachnophobia and would stand stock still in terror and ask debbie to please please please take the spider out of the house asap; the first time it happened was the first time debbie felt strong and brave like her big siblings). debbie and franny do tons of research together and get a mexican redknee tarantula.

the tarantula is a darling. franny learns to be incredibly gentle and careful and bravely lets the little critter climb all over her arms and into her hair, and debs is beaming with pride every time. she takes a million pictures. she thinks it’s so charming that the orange of the spider’s legs blend in with the color of both of their hair. so fun! debbie’s favorite thing is taking care of the tank, and she’s always getting seasonal, spider-safe decor to put in there. franny loves feeding her live crickets. she likes watching the spider hunt and eat them. she thinks it’s the coolest thing ever.

debbie and franny have a couple dream spiders they wish they could have, but they simply don’t have the space/money yet to get them. debbie really wants a whole family of red rumps. franny wants a gooty sapphire — partially because they look so cool, partially because the name is hilarious. when franny is a little older, they move into a bigger house and are able to get an appropriate sized tank for their dream critters. they invite the family over for a housewarming (spider warming?) party. fiona is terrified and sweating and shaking the entire time but takes pictures of the others holding the spiders and gets franny a jellycat spider stuffy.

carl:

watching carl be so gentle and compassionate with those sick dogs in the basement makes me think he’d be so so so good with older/sick/disabled dogs. i think he’d be a really good dog dad and just have the dearest, purest bond with a little guy who maybe uses one of those tiny scooter things for his hind legs to get around (and join carl on runs!). i can also totally see him adopting an ex-police dog! i think it would be the push he needs to get out of law enforcement work (because let’s be real, after his season of disillusionment with cops and buying the alibi, i don’t think he’s staying in the field) and it would be so so good for him.

he and fiona would of course commiserate on the best ways to take care of a traumatized/injured dog. carl would learn to feel more capable and self confident in his abilities as he figures out innovative ways to care for him and provide the mental stimulation he needs without aggravating any injuries. it would just be so good for him. the lil guy would hang out at the alibi or wherever else carl works next and be everyone’s buddy and carl’s pride and joy.

i think he would also end up rescuing/rehabbing a lot of weird critters over the years. especially ones that people tend not to like, like skunks and opossums and rats and whatnot. he’d really relate to being feared/disliked for being “bad” because of his troubled-kid past, and advocate for them. also, his childhood experimentation on little creatures would definitely help him understand what makes them tick and how to help them get better lol.

liam:

so in this hc liam lives with fiona after the series because that’s what should have happened in the show and he simply adores their dog! they’re best friends and she sleeps at the foot of his bed and he loves her so so deeply. but when he grows up and moves out, he doesn’t get a pet for a very long time. after all, his siblings are all constantly coming over with their critters, he’s always pet sitting, always seeing pictures, etc etc etc, so he just doesn’t feel the need to get a pet himself. instead, he lives his best life and enjoys having a pet vicariously through all his siblings for a while.

i think liam would only get a pet after fiona passes away. with her poor self care habits and high stress life, fi goes young — not crazy young, but not old enough to die by any means — and it hits the kids hard, but hits liam the absolute hardest. he’s really lost for a very long time. one day, he finds the tiniest, angriest kitten in the world on the side of the road and decides to rescue it. it scratches the fuck out of him on the way to the vet and he is instantly and unfortunately attached to this little gremlin. he decides to adopt her, despite the fact that she’s very sickly and angry and nasty and doesn’t want anything to do with him. for like six months, they’re at each other’s throats constantly. liam considers giving her to ian and mickey or simply putting her up for adoption like every other week. he hates her guts but can’t stomach the thought of getting rid of her.

finally, eventually, they start to get along. or at least, the cat tolerates liam, and liam begrudgingly starts to like her back. they sit on the couch and watch tv together and judge people’s messy decisions on trashy soaps. the cat stops screaming at him to wake up in the middle of the night and instead walks all over him in his sleep and curls up on his neck to snooze. eventually, she stops trying to kill him. ultimately the cat definitely helps liam through his grief. she does not help the state of his wallet, though; she’s a classy lady and demands the finest of things in her home. liam still kinda hates her (affectionate). he doesn’t name her fiona but sometimes he imagines he’s raising a tiny, angry, traumatized baby fi. it helps.

[godsofhumanity]

Do you mind writing about Artemis's relationship with the Olympians?

haHA!! fine. only because you asked nicely :)

ZEUS

i'm aware of interpretations where Artemis is considered to be one of Zeus' favourite children,, but personally, i don't really see this as being the case.

i think Zeus loves Artemis (and Apollo) the way he loves all of his children, and maybe he gives Artemis a little extra as tribute to Leto-- this is related to my hc that Leto breaks things off with Zeus because she knows that Hera is meant to be with Zeus, not her. so like, its compensation kinda.

one thing about Zeus is that he respects all the decisions of his children; so like, Artemis choosing to go chaste and solo is not something he ever questions about, or tries to get her to change her mind about-- he's just like, "yep ok sweetie, that's cool with me", and i think he actively tells the rest of the gods, "my daughter is off limits".

i think Zeus is probably one of the first people Artemis runs to when she's in trouble.. i guess she's a bit of a daddy's girl.

HERA

they hate each other.

Hera hates how "not like other girls" Artemis tends to come across, and Artemis hates Hera because of how she dislikes Leto and sent Python to attack them.

after Zeus brought Artemis and Apollo to Olympus as Olympians, Hera kinda isn't really able to actively pursue them, but she still glares at them a lot.

Apollo, at least, isn't actively rude to Hera, so she kinda tolerates him.. but Artemis will straight up ignore Hera or just be incredibly curt.

it's always awkward.

DEMETER

ah. you'd think that since both women choose to live outside Olympus on their own, they'd have a lot more in common.

but honestly? i don't think they do. this is probably partly because Demeter and Hera are so close.. i can't imagine that Demeter is over the moon about Artemis, or Leto for that matter.

they're not rude to each other, but i don't think they interact much.

HESTIA

a mother-type of figure to everyone. i think Hestia is just a supportive goddess on the side that everyone can kinda trust i guess.

of course, Artemis already has Leto for a mother, so yeah.

POSEIDON

they DON'T get along.

Poseidon has a baddd track record with women. i think everyone knows this. i can see Artemis keeping WELL away.

Poseidon doesn't really care about Artemis. she's just another one of Zeus' many kids... i don't think she sticks out too much to him.

HADES

again. they're civil. but not much interaction.

they actually do have a similar personality; particularly in that they can be silent and brooding and cold.

PERSEPHONE

a little hc i have is that, when Persephone comes to Olympus for the first time, and everyone's all excited that there's finally another young goddess BESIDES Artemis (Athena isn't born yet), Artemis immediately is like "you should join me and my hunters".

i think she's a little disappointed when Persephone very politely declines, but they remain very good friends.

ATHENA

like i said in the previous post, they get along well.

they have a similar personality, and i can't think of any myths where they're rivals.

APOLLO

WELL.

obviously they're tight as siblings. maybe a little too tight.

i like the idea that Apollo and Artemis keep each other in check.

Apollo knows how important it is that Artemis keeps true to her oaths of chastity and remain with her hunters.

things get complicated when Artemis meets Orion-- and Apollo is very aware of the danger he presents to the hunters.

so, i actually do like the idea that Apollo is the one who tricks Artemis into killing Orion.. or he sends the scorpion to kill Orion.. i can't decide.. but Apollo was definitely the instrument behind Orion's death.

and for the longest time, Artemis hates Apollo's guts for doing this. they don't talk, she doesn't even look in his direction.

but eventually, she comes to terms with it. she knows it was the wrong thing.

Artemis is also the one who kills Coronis when she cheats on Apollo... and i think Apollo would've been pretty distraught about that, but yeah. that's what they do.

so i think they "look out" for each other in that way-- it's always a bit dangerous when you love someone so much you'd kill for them, but i think that's the way their sibling-relationship is (do NOT read into that as romance please!!!!!!!!!!!).

HERMES

they get along nicely.

they have a pretty regular sibling relationship.. not to the extent that it is with Apollo, but you know.. they make fun of each other, they pull pranks on other people together. the usual.

ARES

many gods push Ares to the side. but i like the idea of Ares and Artemis being especially close.

she has a completely different fighting style to Ares- she's long range, he's short range. and i think this makes them a good fit.

i like the idea of Artemis and Ares going hunting together. even though Ares has a pretty lengthy list of lovers, his stories are never like Zeus' or Poseidon's or Dionysus'.. there's no trickery or deceit. and i think that makes Ares a little easier to trust.

he wouldn't hang out with Artemis' hunters, but i can see him participating in her hunt on occasion.

HEPHAESTUS

not much of a relationship. they're very cordial and polite, but most importantly- Hephaestus makes Artemis' hunting equipment.

i think there's also a version of Hephaestus' myth where Leto is one of the goddesses to help raise Hephaestus? i don't agree with that version, but in tribute to that relationship, i can see Hephaestus and Artemis getting along.

DIONYSUS

hm. i think it would be the same as with Hermes.

APHRODITE

surprisingly, i think they actually get along decently well.

i think this is because Ares and Artemis are close, so since Aphrodite is Ares' wife, they get along well.

i have a hc that when Aphrodite first came to Olympus, before she gets a grip on her domain and her role, she sees all the other young Olympians and how they can fight really well, and wants to learn to fight as well- and Artemis, at Apollo's recommendation, is the one who trains her.

so yeah, all in all, they get along well.

[gaast]

I didn't know posts like these still circulated... Got tagged by @cannibalise and am in a really good mood so I'm gonna play, lmao

Last song I listened to: "Modest Mouth," Neil Cicierega, Mouth Sounds.

Currently watching: What, like, a TV show? I haven't watched a TV show in years. I'm playing Tales of Hearts R and Link's Awakening DX HD, I'm reading The Infinite and the Divine, I'm writing about another grafting monster, I'm working on learning Django and Raspberry Pi stuff and related projects and also a stupid mod, and I'm looking for anyone who wants to hire a really expensive and lazy technical writer.

Sweet/savory/spicy: Everything has its time and its place. I will never take sides when three of the baddest bitches are pitted against each other. I've evolved beyond this.

Relationship status: I legitimately forgot this one until I was tagging because I was so excited to see what would come out of me for the next one. Anyway, I'm engaged.

Current obsession: AFK Journey and AFK Arena, maybe. Also, Python, modding Isaac, making really weird dumb involved elaborate jokes. I want Pando to be my obsession, though. I wanna be "the Pando ghost." Oh also autopsies, I haven't forgotten about autopsies!! Or anthropodermic bibliopegy!! Or esolangs!!! Or eels!!!! Fuck!!!!! I want to be obsessed with shit and I'm barely obsessed at all!!!! I feel like John Nash, I need to be a fucked up unmedicated freak in order to reach my full potential!!! I think Russel Crowe did a really good job in A Beautiful Mind but I fucking hate John Nash tbh. Also it fucking sucks that that film has to continue the trend of "electroconvulsive therapy is BAD uwu!!!" Fuck you. It has a fantastic success rate with only mild side effects. It isn't done like how the fucking film shows it. Imagine making A Beautiful Mind and still being an ableist about it. Oh wait a minute that's John Nash for you!!! Also while I'm talking about movies like this, one of my most hated films of all time is Rudy. I cannot STAND that movie. Look, I love Sean Astin. I love The Goonies. He does a great job in that role. But oh my fucking god if that's what Rudy was really like then I hate him so much. All of that effort. All of it. For what? The love of a father who only gives a fucking shit about FOOTBALL? I love football too but imagine VALIDATING the concept that you're only of worth to your PARENT if you FUCKING DEVOTE YOURSELF SOLELY TO THEIR ONLY INTEREST. The fucking dude didn't even CARE that his son actually fucking MADE the Fighting Irish unless he PLAYED and like, dude, it's FOOTBALL, your five-foot nothing son could get fucking KILLED out there, and he's doing it all for YOU, and you don't deserve it!!! But I'm mad at Rudy more!!! I hate him more!!!!! STOP TRYING TO PLEASE A MAN WHOSE DICK WILL NEVER BE DEEP ENOUGH IN YOUR THROAT. GROW THE FUCK UP. YOUR DAD SUCKS. HE SUCKS. YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST KISSED VINCE VAUGHN!!!!!!!!! God that movie blows. If you wanna watch a movie, fucking, watch, uh. I don't remember what movies I like. Fuck you.

Tagging: @monadolaguz, @babyraccy, @vendettagreen, @tmos-time, @geckobrains, @crowtrobot @torterracotta @izanameowe

[cosmas-the-explorer]

Shrek the Third is Underrated

Unlike many people especially internet critics, I don't think Shrek the Third is this horrible abomination on the level of Shyamalan's Avatar.

I think it has a lot of going for it.

Like Shrek's relationship with Arthur. It was great because Shrek was able to impart his own life experiences of being seen as lesser onto Artie. It's a good development for Shrek who once belived he could only be an ugly monster now believes in himself.

And it also ties into his own worries of fatherhood, although that part might have been underdeveloped.

Prince Charming I actually thought was insteresting in that he persuaded the villians that they were the underdogs and that they should take hold of their destiny. I think the ending could have better with Charming considering whether Artie has a point and either embracing or rejecting it, instead of just ironically being the pure villian out of it.

I do agree this was not the best Shrek movie though. It didn't have that grandeur of the pervious and it felt kind of like a tv movie, I dont know what it was exactly.

I think Artie was underdeveloped. We could have seen him try to have to be taught by Shrek Donkey and Puss how to lead. And show that he did have some hidden talent after all that just had to be pried from positive reinforcement. Also... I'd like to see more references to Arthurian stories even if just Monty Python!

Personally I think they focused on those dumb princesses with Fiona too much and it took away from the genuinely heartfelt Artie arc. In fact, Fiona being a relative perhaps should have also went to see her relative. It could have given some development for her too, altough that would probably require some changes to the story.

I could say more in this rough unedited defense but I'll just say this. Shrek the Third isn't the worst. I would say it's not even bad. Maybe a little mid but I think there is a great movie underneath. Frankly I think it's better than Shrek Forever After which I am not as attached to and have my own personal gripes with it.

And for God's sake, we couldn't have at least invited King Arthur to Shreks kids birthday?! I dont care if Timberlake had a concert going on, they should've gotten another actor!

Anyways that's all folks. This is the Cosmic Explorer signing out. (Heh I like that name)