#maybe ill go back to my pc and try again..

[sparkdoesart]

I hate to post this here but i drew it so i might as well

Even if the world wants me to fail, even if i do, i will never stop giving all i have for the people around me. I will be kind and understanding until the day i die.

[dullahandyke]

didnt even touch on the sandra lynn stuff int he tags of the last post bcos if i talk about her im liable to explode. get behind me, middle-aged divorced woman proficient in archery

[azialways]

Wrong Hit

in which the Butcher chose the wrong animal to slaughter.

cw: mentions of future sex, sexual ideas, attempted murder, suggestive dialogue, cigarettes

It was another dull day for Ronin, not much drama on the server, nor in life. Work was mid, he did get to fix this cool looking motorcycle though. Besides that, a whole lot of nothing happened. Good news, it was slash season…meaning he could go kill as much as he pleased. He got on the server, asking the people what their thoughts were.

<goreboy>

yo Guys

feeling bored. should I go Kill someone?

find some unsuspecting passerby?

<hitmeuppp>

for SURE!

i mean find someone who seems boring or something

don’t go killing a baddie or somethin

or do, if they look snobby, i fucking hate snobby people

they’re always so annoying and uptight, that’s why people pay me to kill em

aaaaa i’m ranting again

<V>

I think it is inappropriate.

Do not go killing random strangers unless they have done wrong.

<hitmeuppp>

V SIGHTING! I REPEAT! V SIGHTING

<goreboy>

i think ill Agree with Misaki on this One.

i’ll send Pics

He then shuts off his PC and finds his killing clothes, which were to nobody’s surprise, on his dresser. He used them way too frequently this time of year, but luckily he had actually cleaned them. He threw them on, his favorite killing hoodie as well, then his gloves. Obviously couldn’t forget those, what type of serial killer would he be if he left evidence? Well, a fried one. He didn’t like the idea of the electric chair, because that meant getting caught and having no fun killing around, and instead spending time in a metal and stone cage. He then grabbed his crowbar, putting it in his instrument case He then grabbed his smaller knife, sheathing it then shoving it in his pocket. He double checked his beanie, then put the hood up. Last thing he needed was to leave any hair behind. But damn, he looked good to go. And hot. Maybe he’d go pick some girl up who thought he was hot, or maybe just drag someone into Purgatory, he’d figure it out. But first, he had to get out of the house, so he fed his pets, then walked out. At first, he strolled about, finding his way to the side entrance that led to Purgatory, maybe he’d light a cigarette and see if anyone joined him. That sounds good, dragging an innocent smoker trying to ease themselves in the alley.

He eventually stood there, putting his crowbar case down and took a pack out of his pocket, and then his lighter. He lit the cigarette, taking a long drag before tapping some of the ash onto the floor. He stood there alone for a while, leaving him to ponder his murder. He was thinking: wait til someone comes into the alley, chat them up a bit, then hold 'em at knifepoint, play with them for a little, then kill. He was feeling mean tonight, he was too bored to play quick and easy, no, he wanted to draw it out. He wanted to cut their voice box and hear their feeble attempts at screaming, slowly ripping them open and apart, falling into his signature. And as if the universe heard him, a person stepped into the alleyway. They looked at him for a second, acknowledging his presence before taking a cigarette out and lighting it; well, trying. Their lighter didn’t seem to work, and he heard a gentle “fuck.” It was the perfect opportunity.

“Wanna use mine?” He offered, holding it out to them.

“Could I? Sorry, mine died.” They muttered, lighting their cigarette with his lighter, and it lit. They inhaled, then exhaled. They then handed his lighter back, muttering a “thanks.”

“So. What’s a gorgeous individual like yourself doing in an alleyway smoking at 10pm on a Tuesday night?” He asked casually

“Got off my shift, needed a break. Was kinda a shitshow tonight.” They laughed softly, putting the cigarette to their lips.

“Where do you work?” Ronin asked nonchalantly, keeping the friendly appearance up.

“Vauhn’s on Orchard.” They responded, it was a club and restaurant nearby, and from the looks of the uniform, he’d guess the bartender.

“You look like a bartender.”

“You are correct. I legally poison people for a living.” They joked

He chuckled at that, the way they put it was unique. Ironic for the situation they were about to be in. He walked closer to them, bringing his cigarette to theirs before relighting. “They were going out, stupid rain.” He explained, but the pink on their cheeks showed he did exactly what he intended. He was ready to hit, he chatted, he charmed, now it was time to attack. They were charming, he’d admit. Maybe too much so, they had to die. Once they had their back turned, he snuck behind and wrapped his arm around their neck, holding the knife firm.

“Scream and you’re dead.” He warned, his tone much colder than before.

“Alright alright, chill bud. I don’t plan on screaming.” They raised their hands in surrender, a half laugh escaping from their lips.

“How many inches is that?”

Ronin choked on air as he heard the words escaping their lips, sure the friction got him a little hard, but not nearly enough to warrant the question.

“Excuse me?”

“The knife genius, not your dick.”

“Oh, shit uh.”

“7?” They guessed, and right they were.

“Yeah, how’d you know.” He asked, a little confused on how they guessed it so easily.

“I got one myself…right here.” They spun, shoving him against the wall with the knife to his throat. They pressed hard, not gentle at all, he winced slightly.

“Try anything funny and i’ll slice your goddamn head off.”

“Damn, alright, you got me, sweetheart.” He teased, putting the knife away.

“Who are you?” They asked.

“The devil, baby.” He responded, chuckling slightly. Then, he shut up as they pressed harder.

“You don’t know who I am, or what i’ve done. You made the wrong pick to hit out on, bud.”

“Yeah, who are you then?”

“Y'know that killer whose been on the rise?”

“Nah, no way.”

“And you’re The Butcher, huh? Crowbar case, lurking in Purgatory?”

“Only I call it that. How do you know that?”

“Misaki. I'm sure you know ‘em.” They responded.

“Fuck. Damnit Misaki.”

“Don’t worry baby, i’m not gonna kill you…you’re too pretty and important to die.” They cooed, and he hated it.

“Don’t baby me. And if you aren’t gonna kill me, get off.” He growled angrily, this brat was starting to get on his nerves.

“Or what, Ronin?” They sneered.

“Misaki told you my name too, huh? Who are you?”

“Y/N. And i’ll get off, but from the way your body is reacting, it seems you don’t want me to. I can see your hand reaching out to touch me.” Fuck, they were observant, maybe too observant.

“Fuck off, just because you give me a bit of a boner doesn’t mean shit.” He grumbled embarrassedly.

“Mhm, sure. I see they way you looked at me back there…you wanted to eat me alive.” They ran their finger up his chest.

“Flirting with the devil…it’s like you wanna end up in hell.” He scowled.

“I’m ending up there either way, why not have fun before I do?”

“just shut up before I do something stupid.” He responded, grabbing their shirt and pulling them closer. His eyes dropped to their lips…fuck they looked so pretty and plump…he could ruin them with his teeth. Their neck too, another thing he could ruin. He could ruin them and their entire being then build it up from fucking scratch. He wanted to, they were hot, feisty, not afraid…he liked that.

“Like what? You gonna kill me? or are you going to kiss me?” They sneered, their hand on his jaw.

“Little bit of A, little bit of B…I could fucking ruin you.” He caved.

“Why don’t you, hm? You're scared?”

“Oh you little…” He pulled them in for a kiss, pushing them against the wall. It was messy and needy, deep and full of desire. He bit their lip, licking up the blood and swallowing their moans. He didn’t know how much he needed this til he had it, and now he never wanted to be without it. Without this annoying, but so attractive individual. His mind raced with the filthiest thoughts that just made him as hard as his back alley dick could be, it made him moan softly into the kiss, and when they realized, they grinded into him until he wanted to just cum in his pants like a teenager. The things this person did to him were wrong, so so wrong and so stupid, he wasn’t one for love or sex, no he was just a mechanic and a killing machine by night, not some sexy loverboy. But for them, he might just be. Or maybe just a one time stand, or a frequent hookup, he’d never know unless he let himself indulge in this fantasy just once. Truth is, they were as crazy as he was, who knew how they were in bed? Only one way to find out.

[27thfirefly]

For that character ask game, all the SKA pcs? (if that's not too many) or Quentin if you feel like it

9 characters might be a bit much to do all at once. so ill just do quentin n maybe come back here if i feel like it later...

-How I feel about this character

HES SO FUN such a great introduction to the kind of character ty likes to play and in general a huge part of what makes pop so fun... such a good twisty turny arc of being a mentor figure and yet not and accepting your past mistakes as part of who you are in the eyes of others but still being able to a. see that you have done wrong and b. righting the wrongs that people want you to n letting the ones that others cant forgive you for lie rather than try and go out of your way to push yourself into their life again.

-All the people I ship romantically with this character

ehhhh honestly not that many considering? like there's a line in the epilogues thats like "my eidolon is dating someone?" which to me reads very much as a flip on well why is this a necessary thing for An Ending to do wrt characters. which informs quite a bit of my thoughts re quentin and his relationships. i do like thinking about quentin and henry though not in an outright relationship and in an au where canon doesnt happen i can see this weird very unstable polycule happening with the rest of the tower gang. this does not end well. nuclear fallout. also in extension of og quentins deal with henry i think its funny to imagine a romcom situation thing with president stoker & quincy where to stoker this is a death note ass scenario of trying to avoid quentin but also never really caring to push him away so much that its an outright rejection of his advances.

-My non romantic OTP with this character

I LOVE THINKING ABOUT URSULA-URSA AND QUENTIN IN HOW DEVOTION AND SELF-SACRIFICE AND WEIRD ASS HISTORY TOGETHER PUSHES THEM AWAY FROM EACH OTHER WHILE ALSO BEING A KEY PART OF HOW THEY DEFINE THEMSELVES NOW AND !!!! like i dont think of it in terms of an otp or whatever but theyre for sure one of the top dynamics i think of when i think back on pop s1... i have to relisten to pops2 as well cause the stuff with q and sloane was also just. so good. i love them. theyre so fun to see bounce off each other

-My unpopular opinion about this character

uhhh dunno if theres a lot of Unpopular Opinions to be had when im not even sure of the Popular Opinion on him. like the things i have to say about where he ended up were also talked about by the creators so like. shrugs. i think i could get along with him in real life?

-One thing I wish would happen/has happened to this character in canon

AGAIN the stuff i would have liked to see. specifically re him having an actual confrontation with carly about All That. was also mentioned by you know the people making the show. so honestly i understand why it didnt happen but i like thinking about it... but i also feel like it does work decently in the epilogue too yanno

[randomnesseva]

Give me your OC's lore. Now.... please (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)

Okii, ill let u know my ocs lore in the banner :3

I'll only be going to the genral ones and not the super detailed,cause the details might change.

Trigger warning: Blood, abuse, suicide, and Murder...I wont explain in detail so it wont trigger u as much.

Valda- A very known scientist for his inventions and collaborative projects with another company. Where Laura(his lover worked in), He invented holograms, Devices that helped the other scientists drasticaly and other technologies that went viral and now used commonly nowadays...Laura is just an ordinary civilan and barely had any contributions conpared to Him. But he still loved her as if she was valuable as the Most expenaove diamond. One day Laura had founf a kid in the streets(My sona/aka me) she then decided to adopt it as her little sister, and took it everywhere for i was too young to be left alone. Several meetings with Valda, Days before therr marriage, Laura got in an accident, with me being also the first witness to this. It caused tragedy to both of us, leading for valda to be depresed, and taking care amd raising me as a promise to Laura.

Eric- He was the son of a very known company. A large expectations from his parents, he was forced to be a perfect person in academics. His mother wanting him to be the heir of the company, She did not support him on becoming a scientist inventor. Causing him to hide it in a secret basement. He did not have many friends except for a friend he fond dearly of. To this day, His friend is forcing him to socialize more, to make more friends and all. Still having the weight on his shoulders of the family expectations.

Ava lore: Hudson and Redacted:

They are created sticks created by my me/sona. With [Redacted] being the oldest one and Hudson being the youngest. We all had a good time together, Until a virus wa slet in the pc. For Redacetd did not know how to detect one, accidentally making an entrance for it. The virus attacked, causing for redacted to lost his core memories. As i aided in action, I sent them both to the outernet, but brcause of the rush. I sent them separatedly...Making the end up in different experiences.

Redacted- He was found by a single father and his two children (Not named yet). They took him in, But contrats to this and redacted's memory...He folowed his knsticts trying to get back uo to the pc. The family misunderstandimg this as him trying ro dk suicide. They then treated him as best as they can for him to prevent him to doing it again. It caused him to want to avoid the past, But his unwanted memories lingers him. His talent for creativity made him avoid it. Cause it was part of a past he can never Go back or afraid to.

Hudson- Instead of ending up in a welcoming family like Redacted did. He ended up in an abusive one. His knly refuge was His sister amd mother who adopted him. While the Father was an abusive person, he goes home drunk every night, and when blame is put to the two children, The mother protects them and now is the one being violated. Hudson worked hard to free them from His adopted fathers house. But it was too late, His adoptive mother died cause by his father. His adoptive sister was abused. It caused him to snap, And kill the father, but accidentally killing the sister too in the process. He then joined an assasin job, to atleast use the death lf his targets as a way to cope with thedeath of gjs adoptive family...

Ok maybe i revealed too much :3 idk if im gonna be able to turn it into a comic anyway

[our-queer-experience]

so today i decided to finally start working out again after not doing it for over a year and holy shit

honestly i went into this with "i wanna gain more muscle and maybe lose weight" and now im just sitting here like-

honest idec if i get either of those (well ik i will since that just happens when u work out but thats not wut i mean-) i just love the feeling i get during and afterward. i originally went into it thinking "i'll just go easy and do just 20 minutes." then i got carried away and it was suddenly an hour later.

i also remember that when i used to do it id do very specific workouts to try and make my chest and hips smaller and it actually did work (until i stopped working out ofc) so now im sitting here getting all giddy bc its like- ill be able to get that again.

the last time i stopped bc of mental health stuff and it was getting progressively harder to get motivation but now im feeling better and man i regret nothing. im also sitting here like "holy shit i get to do this every day???" im acting like i just got a new pc or something- but yeah, some personal happiness and good news from me!

i also do want to say that if anyone who is reading this doesnt want to or cant workout thats completely okay too! some ppl dont feel the same joy that i do when i workout. its entirely ur choice of if u want to do it or not.

i’ve been getting back into the gym as a means of like. dealing with anxiety? i have a lot of pent up adrenaline and it’s very helpful to have an outlet for it, and i also love the idea of being muscular and big. now it’s a positive force in my life, which is very nice.

[xctaanayuu0]

My hands hurt

Pijamas party with theme of Ninja turtles yee

So uh, Im starting to see again the Ninja Turtles of 2012 (my childhood man) And today at class i had this idea of this mans happy with their matching pijamas

And about fresh uuuh idk I just had the need to practice more, instead the others I always try to draw his face more fine and the others more round- I wanted to draw Ganz sans too cause when I was a kid, I did an animation with him "Beautiful lies" (Idk where it end the animation, its lost)

But Im done for now cause, 1 am lmao (my reality is altered and I see things, help.)

If any of u that see this have a request of draw a sans or anything else just ask, there are so many that idk who to draw first (or maybe I should draw my au and go back to class)

Oh and I think digital art only will be posted the weekends (if they are not made in phone) cause with class I can only use the pc to draw at weekends, Ill try to be active (but im famous at people who knows me that im a inactive poop lmao)

See ya

[d-trashbandicoot]

02/06/25 - The Rock

Now when did the memory go to shit. Was it always like this? is it the illness? the infrequent cannabis from 16? is it worse or the same ? today is apathy, passive aggressive apathy. Someone who cares, a minority in this world it seems and I am part of enough of those. So why should i care? Cause it's moral? "the right thing"? healthy ? Why should i compound the existing damage in my head with the violence outside. The never ending stream of horror broadcast 24/7 straight to the illuminated rectangles in our pockets. Craving our attention, constantly sending pings to keep us plugged in, listening in to our lives. How long before they can read our thoughts? what if they already can. I remember the time before. A simpler time. Mind you, we already had the web. Tiny pixelated screens, webpages loading line by line. The more on the page the longer the load. Games that didn't require any connection, no ads, no microtransactions. Games to pass time. Snake, tower stack and one of the many versions of that pong brick breaker. Fun and basic, perfect for the waiting room. But to really get connected on the web, to interact with media or others, required a pc. A dedicated device, often with a dedicated space and with a startup. Even if just a moment, it was still a moment of waiting. A moment to gather ones thoughts, and think about the tasks. So maybe that's the issue. The need to keep the mind occupied, because one can't handle spending time with one's own thoughts, found it's perfect drug. Social Media. The endless stream of information, wasn't that the kinda stuff that made a mind insane in myths and legends ? And now here we are, year after year of digital slop dulling the mind. That has definitely done more damage than any intoxication or bipolar autism could do. How many years lost in the scroll. What has actually remained from it. Some halfbaked ideas of things i gained a desire to do? They come and go just like the feed. Self aware but what good is that if one can't action a change. I am a fucking addict. But the drug is distraction, as a constant endless barrage. Every so often I will try to quit it, without much success. Maybe this time it will be different. ANYWAY. Back on the rock (tm). Good news tho, theres a job posting. Two actually, First Response or Crematorium technician. The Para quest line, may still be open but the goth in me calls for a job at the morgue. Bad news, no more E. Hopefully the scabies rash will flare up again to confirm it is not scabies but a T allergy and i'll get that fastracked e. Crazy, never thought anyone would be want to have an allergy but here we are. The next months probally gonna suck. But I guess what a better time to make the most of this lil island in the sun, and kick the habit. I had a lot more to rant about but it is now passed. Gone with the rest of the misplaced ideas and dreams. BING BONG FUCK YA LIFE

[egailegailegail]

going to add my nightmare windows story to this because im still mad about it.

about a year ago, i was getting ready to go to bed so i put my pc into sleep mode. pc needed to update, but i was tired and figured it wouldnt matter very much because i could always update it tomorrow.

worst. mistake. of my life.

a few hours later im awoken the room flooding with bright red light (my windows accent color) and the relatively loud sounds of my pc turning on. i have a full blown panic attack in a half lucid state for an unknowable amount of time where i kept waking up and panicking then passing out from fear and waking up over and over and over.

eventually i wake up fully and crawl over to my pc in a dazed state

"working on update. 30% complete"

oh ok i guess it decided to update while i was sleeping. ill just go get some water

get one foot out of my room and i step in the biggest puddle of piss i have ever seen in my entire life. a liter of piss my dog left right outside my door. i spend about an hour and a half, still shaking, cleaning this fucking lake superior of canine urine

get back to my room and check in on the progress

"working on update. 30% complete"

ok fine. turn off my display and go to sleep for the night. wake up.

"working on update. 30% complete"

ok fine. restart and try again. give it an hour.

"working on update. 30% complete"

ok fine. try again.

"working on update. 30% complete"

ok fine. call in tech experts in my house, message all tech friends i know. they give me advice on how to stop this update from perpetually shitting itself. we're at this computer for hours trying to figure out what the fuck is going wrong or how to get it to abort the update. and then after maybe 30 attempts throwing everything at the wall, it just works. it just starts working suddenly. it says it failed to update and lets me on my pc.

every single one of my exe files that didnt come prepackaged on my system are completely corrupted and do not run anymore. all the icons on my desktop are busted. the system is running like a horrified newborn baby dear. stuttering, stalling, and pc tower keeps making strange noises when i try to do anything for a few hours.

every file that wasnt an exe was thankfully in tact except for my minecraft world for some unknowable reason. all my saves got deleted, including the one id been on for about 6 months. my resource packs were not deleted i have no idea why just my saves were lost.

i blame the windows corporation for all of this. especially the dog piss. fuck you, bill.

i thought my laptop was on its last leg because it was running at six billion degrees and using 100% disk space at all times and then i turned off shadows and some other windows effects and it was immediately cured. i just did the same to my roommate's computer and its performance issues were also immediately cured. okay. i guess.

so i guess if you have creaky freezy windows 10/11 try searching "advanced system settings", go to performance settings, and uncheck "show shadows under windows" and anything else you don't want. hope that helps someone else.

[lottagiftbox]

dang with all the spam calls you think something would be done about it by now. i would recommend getting another app with a second phone number. ok so a so called friend that keeps going back and forth with me said that a single game on pc doesn't work that means the whole thing is bad. if you say its the pc devs that messed up then thats gonna cause a whole full on fight for some reason. console is supposedly better cuz one game runs well on it but not on pc. and if you say that comsole is better then ill still fight you! sheesh man. every time too. if i offer a code word or for him to tell me topics to avoid he pretends we don't fight all the time instead. of course he has to blame it in me instead of not fighting in the first place. i guess as the years go on i can always just use their gifts for next year? i never have fought with others this much tho honestly. its a pattern that i want solved first and foremost. i dont wish to fight about anything but here we are. heaven forbid someone says its the devs fault not the platforms fault. my god the pointless fight i had with that one. this guy can and will literally fight about anything. but why he wants to fight in the first place instead of just play games is beyond me. i was just all "go ahead and block me and ill see ya next time" then left his server. im just gonna try agreeing with everything he says even if its untrue. maybe thatll work? or just stay silent. but this bickering just is a real no go for me. it needs to end. while i do enjoy the crosspaly games i dont enjoy the fights. i guess deep down he knows that im right and thats whats upsetting for him. and if i say it again its not upsetting for him. so its definitely not me thats causing it but its whatever. probably why i need to stick eith single player for now. at least till i can find chatty friends that are willing to play daily. so if its not what im saying thats the problem how do i find out what is? ive known the guy 4-5 yrs snd csnt figure it out. but we didnt always fight. i get that hes a fan boy and maybe thats why but its something as sinple as him pressing a button that can trigger a fight. "hey press y" is a fight for him for some reason. maybe he does need to stick with consoles. im getting the xbox s the all digital one but only if we can play without fighting. the pc community isnt gonna want someone that cant be talked to. Manager is still saying "oddle lee" but thankfully is largely being ignored by everyone so therefore he might stop

[thirsty-lakedream]

Third Roomate

I arrive after a long day of classes and this is the first thing I see when I walk into the apartment.

I’m not too surprised. It’s quite normal to see my roommate sitting on the couch and watching one of his shows. What I did not expect is how he looked.

“Hey, Matt…”

The guy glances over but says nothing, instead turning his attention back to the tv. Instead of his normal sci-fi shit he instead is watching a baseball match.

“Matt, yo I’m talking to you.” I try to block the screen with my body but he simply leans over, pointing the remote to the screen.

“In a sec man, I’m trying to watch the game.” I roll my eyes. I doubt he actually knows what’s going on about, just trying to play into his new look. “And stop calling me Matt, you know my name.”

I roll my eyes, “God you are obsessed. You know, when I agreed to buy ‘Gabriel’ with you I thought I’d at least get a turn every so often…”

“Oh come on.” The muscles blonde stood up, towering nearly a foot above me. If I didn’t know any better, I’d feel a bit intimidated. “I’m just having some fun with our new toy before you take him for the rest of the night!”

“Is this fun? Your sitting all alone pretending to be some dumb jock interested in sports. Tell me Gabe, did ‘Matt’ even go to class today?”

He shifted slightly trying to hide away, but with his big frame it was difficult to. “Not exactly… But don’t worry, l attended for him.”

“Dude! Are you serious?” Turning away from the guy, I barged into my roommate’s room, where I found him exactly where I thought I would. He stood in the center wearing a full-body haptic suit and VR headset strapped onto his head. He faced the wall, seemingly staring at nothing. The equipment was rigged to his PC, with the screen showing all sorts of familiar diagnostics and body mapping windows.

“You’ve seriously been using Gabriel all day? Even when you know I called using him tonight! Now his batteries are gonna be dead before I can even use him.” You grab him by the shoulder trying to shake him back to reality.

Matt didn’t turn to me but responded to my accusation “Relax bro. He’s been on the charger since he got home so you don’t have to worry! Look!” From behind me Gabriel walked up, standing attentively.

Both Matt and Gabriel spoke in at the same time in unison. “See? Look I’m Gabriel and I’m ready to go out with my frat bros all night!” Matt performed a mocking jig and Gabriel mimicked the exact movement. He then touched his finger to the temple of his virtual reality goggles and in an instant Gabriel halted all movement.

You see, Gabriel isn’t a real person, he never was actually. He’s what’s known as a techno-puppet. Like how in a video game you can use a controller to manipulate your avatar. It works the same way but instead you control this hyper realistic doll. It wasn’t hard to see why Matt took such a liking to living as him. We spent the last month building this entire life, even forging papers to make him an ‘official’ student in our college. We have people thinking he’s our third roomate, but in reality he’s just a toy for us to experience an exciting college life.

I waited for a moment as he took off the VR equipment and handed it to me. Hiding away into my own room, I excitedly put on the gear. Sitting myself down comfortably on my bed, felt around the headset until I found the power button. Pressing it, the technology in the haptic and goggles whittled to life. After a brief loading time, my vision awoke and I found myself once again standing in Matt’s room. My roomate grinned trying to hide his envy as I was now in control of Gabriel. Maybe ill give him a taste of his own medicine for hogging the beautiful body by taking him for the entire weekend. I know Matt is harboring a secret crush on our puppet so teasing him around the apartment can be a warmup to get into my new persona

[miekasa]

Roommate Au with Eren. That’s it.

No no no no because I’ve thought about this extensively, and I actually believe he’d be a pretty good roommate (or at the very least, he means well most of the time, even if he is slightly annoying in his methods LMAO).

He… is not the best cook in the world, and he knows that. He can make about 2.5 dishes properly: spaghetti and [frozen] meatballs, a grilled cheese maybe with bacon if he’s feeling up to challenge, and a soup that his mom used to make for him as a kid whenever he got sick.

So, you’re gonna have to handle the majority of the cooking, BUT the good news is that Eren will do the dishes as a thanks for sharing with him and not letting him starve and/or live off of UberEats credits.

His favorite rooms in the house are the living room and your room. Not his room, not the bathroom, not the kitchen—your room. Why? Because you’re in there, duh, and it’s not his so that makes it that much better.

Eats your leftovers in the fridge unless you put a note on them. Sometimes, he’ll still eat it if he’s hungry enough or in a rush, and you’ll come home to an empty fridge, but there’ll be a new note on top of a $20 bill that says “Sorry I ate your pad thai :( you can buy some more tho (and get me some too hehe)”

If you’re just lazing around in your room for an extended amount of time, Eren will just come in and. Flop down on your bed—maybe even on top of you—and whine about how he’s bored and how you’re being boring and how you should entertain and hang out with him instead.

Claims your room is comfier than his room, so of course he’s gonna wanna be in there. He’ll literally lay and sit on the floor and watch a whole ass movie on his phone in your room, just because.

If you have or collect stuffed animals or Squishmallows or anything of the sort, he always giggles at them, but thinks they’re super cute. And when he’s out without you and sees some, he sends you a picture of them and asks if you want any, and he’ll buy them for you.

He gets you very… involved? if that makes sense. He likes to do things with you and hang out with you—he doesn’t wanna live with some stranger, so if you’re rooming with him, prepare to become friends very quickly.

Eren’s a bit of an… outgoing introvert? not-so-social extrovert? something like that in my book lmfao, so he knows what it’s like to just wanna sit in your room for days on end; but he also knows there’s a limit to how good/restorative that can be, and when it can become an issue.

That being said, if you’re having an extended depressive and/or introverty episode, Eren will shake you out of it. Literally. He will burst into your room, and grab you and probably toss you over his shoulder to get you physically moving, all while yelling about plans he made for the two of you.

Drags you with him to the grocery store, under the claim that he needs help “picking out the good apples,” when really he just wants to get you out of the house, and spend some time with you.

Once again, will use the method of flopping on top of you and/or draping himself over you like, “Hey, so what time do you think we should leave for dinner, I’m thinking around 8?” “What—did we have dinner plans, Eren?” “We do now! So, I’m thinking tacos, what do you think!!”

His personal favorite way to get you up and moving is to ask you to do his hair for him. Gives you his best puppy dog eyes, and pulls at your wrist until you comply, then he sits down criss-cross applesauce right in the middle of your bed, and waits for you to work your magic. Purposely acts a bit difficult just to bring out your feisty side and have you fight back against him.

He’ll legit. Build you a whole ass pc and gaming setup just for you to play games with him. He’s dedicated, that’s for sure. (That won’t stop him from absolutely crushing you from time to time).

He likes to bother you (affectionate). Pushes you over when you’re sitting down on the couch, shoves your phone when you’re holding it so it falls on your face, presses his cold water bottle on the back of your neck and then runs away. Like a child.

He always takes out the trash, especially if it’s late at night, except he always forgets about the 239725 water bottles he’s got piled up in his room and around the living room, so you’ve always gotta take out an extra bag of recycling the following morning.

Your skincare is his skincare <2

Makes you go out with him when he makes plans with his friends, but only ever tells you about it maybe an hour beforehand via text.

yeager: hey jean and marco are having a lil kickback thing at their place so i'm coming to pick u up be ready in like 30 mins

yeager: oh also bring the bottle of vodka in the kitchen kirsten is always stingy with the good stuff 🙄

you: ok and who asked ME if i wanna kickback with jean and marco and co?????

yeager: nobody!! i’m just telling u to get dressed!! love u ill be there soon 🥳🥳

He starts doing his laundry whenever you do yours. Partially to annoy you, partially because it’s somewhat more efficient that way, and partially because he’s watching you like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t mess up his own clothes lmfao

He’ll roll weed for you only if you promise to share a joint with him, and don’t flake!! He’ll catch you in your sleep if you flake, he knows where you live.

When you both come home kinda drunk after a night out, he always dramatically tells you goodnight and to “get home safe,” even though “getting home safe” means walking from the living room down the hall to your room.

Tells everyone you’re the best roomie anyone could ask for, and does a not so humble brag about all his favorite roommate qualities that you exude.

If he has a little crush on you, he’ll try not to make it obvious; and truthfully, he doesn’t act all that different, except now maybe he finds more excuses to touch you and tries to up the romance when you two “hang out” together.

He starts looking (staring) at you more, and is always embarrassed if you ever catch him. I don’t think that he would ever tell you unless he was 120% sure you liked him back, because that would lead to a really awkward living situation if you rejected him, or if he made you uncomfortable with his feelings.

But if you do like him back, once again, few things will change: it’s just that now, he’ll sneak into your room in the middle of the night for cuddles, and you’ll get a kiss on the forehead for cooking him dinner <3

[pokemoncreepypasta]

Forever Mine

[STORY SOURCE]

I live in one of those small towns with a big community. It feels like everyone knows each other, and parents would visit their friends and leave their kids to mess around with each other. Classes in school weren’t very large.

So when there’s news about a kid dying, it travels at god-speed. 

Everyone at school kept talking about the death of this girl who was probably a year behind me.

I didn’t know her personally. I wouldn’t have even been able to tell you her name if everyone wasn’t talking about her.

I didn’t want to pick up gossip about how she died. I decided to attend her funeral myself. Not because we were friends or anything, but I did want to show my respect for this girl and her family.

The local funeral home was within biking range of my house, so I set off.

I sat awkwardly as I noticed her parents. I’m not usually very good at picking up feelings from people, but I could tell that beyond their grief was disappointment and maybe even hostility.

They made me wonder what she was thinking about before she died.

After she was buried, I hung around the cemetery. I’d wished I brought flowers with me, but decided I’d give her some the next time I stopped by.

Around this time, I had been aiming to get a Sky Forme Shaymin, since it was one of my favorite Pokémon back then.

I had caught a wild Shaymin using the "Pokémon Modifier" cheat code. I was terrible at coming up with creative names. But then, I remembered the name of the girl and thought it would suit a Shaymin rather well.

“Skye.”

Little did I know that this would invite strange things to start happening to my game.

I wanted to keep this Shaymin in its Sky Forme whenever possible, so I planned on keeping it in my team 24/7, only playing during daytime, etc. I was a dirty cheater who liked putting illegal moves on my Pokémon, so I taught Skye to use Fly.

At the time, I didn’t know you needed to catch the Shaymin in Flower Paradise to receive the Gracidea Flower, so when I talked to the blonde girl NPC in Floaroma Town, I had no idea why she wouldn’t give it to me.

So I was stuck with a Shaymin that knew Fly. It was weird, and I never really grew all that attached to it. Eventually I boxed it, forgot I had it, and released it without thinking.

The next time I booted up the game, I got this message.

“The save file is corrupted. The previous save file will be loaded.”

My first instinct was panic. I didn’t have any time to think or process the initial message, because all my hours were gone. With nervous anticipation, I started up the save file to see what the damage was.

To my surprise, I found myself on an incomplete Seabreak Path. The south path to Route 224 was cut off, with a featureless Shaymin staring vacantly over the edge.

I checked my party, and found none of my team members.

Only a level 100 Dusknoir with the move Follow Me.

Very useful, I thought. I’d have to boot up my Action Replay to teach this thing Fly in order to get off the island later.

Checking my items, I noticed everything was gone, save for a single PokéBall and an Escape Rope. Neither of which seemed particularly helpful for getting me off this island.

Out of curiosity though, I decided to see if Shaymin would be at Flower Paradise. I started my trek north, lamenting the loss of my bike.

To my surprise, Shaymin was there, despite never having Oak’s Letter or triggering the cutscene with it. Its face was obstructed by flowers, but it seemed like its pink flowers were missing just like the one I saw before.

I spoke to the Shaymin, and a message appeared.

“I remember you.”

“But… You don’t remember me, do you?”

The wild Shaymin attacked, and my heart stopped at its name.

“Skye appeared!”

Featureless, like before.

I felt a knot in my stomach, not even caring about the game. Something was very clearly wrong with it, and I wanted to stop playing. But I decided I was already taking pictures of the weird stuff that was happening, and I wanted to document it in full.

Steeling my resolve, I went about my options.

Dusknoir only knew Follow Me, so it was useless to weaken the Shaymin.

Remembering the PokéBall I had, I tossed it at the Shaymin.

Most people would be ecstatic to catch a Shaymin with full HP in a PokéBall on their first try, but I got the feeling that the game was rigged. There wasn’t any triumphant music playing either, which didn’t help my feelings about it.

I tried checking my newly caught Shaymin, but my game froze upon checking my party.

Upon restarting the system and starting the game up, this message appeared.

“My heart is corrupted. Please save me.”

My save file was gone for real this time. The trainer’s name was “SINNER”.

I live in a pretty religious community, so reading this made me ill at ease.

Starting up the game again, I found myself in the Lost Tower, playing as a featureless Shaymin.

My only Pokémon was the same Shaymin, named SINNER, knowing Fly, Scary Face, Fake Tears, and Spite.

A text box appeared when I tried to leave the tower.

“Today’s the day.”

It pushed me back, preventing my exit. The only option I had was to ascend.

No random encounters happened, and all the trainers wouldn’t interact with me.

It went this way until I went to the top floor. I’m pretty sure there isn’t supposed to be a man and woman NPC standing in this spot.

"There’s nothing left to say.”

Interacting with them just prompted this text.

It was here that I noticed a staircase that wasn’t supposed to be there.

I found myself on the top of the tower. I stepped into a scripted event, and the Shaymin faced the edge without my prompt.

"It's a long way down... Are you ready?"

Hoping for some way out of this, I wanted to say “no”, so I could cheat my way out of the tower and get my game back to normal. However, upon selecting it, this text appeared.

"You've held back for long enough. It's time to go."

“SINNER used the Escape Rope.”

A battle started against the same Dusknoir as before. I was intimidated to go against a level 100 Dusknoir, but then I remembered its only move was Follow Me, so it was harmless.

I realized that if I let SINNER faint, I could go to the last Pokémon Center and escape the tower.

I used Spite, thinking that if I reduced Follow Me’s PP, the Dusknoir would use Struggle and OHKO my Shaymin.

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER used Spite!”

“But there was no target...”

Dang it.

Deciding to experiment, I came to the conclusion that there was no harm in screwing around with SINNER’s attacks until DUSKNOIR ran out of PP. I chose Fly.

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER used Fly!”

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER kept going and crashed!”

Not the KO I was expecting, but I took it nonetheless.

The game, of course, crashed as soon as my Shaymin’s cry played, leaving nothing but pleasantly ear-grating screeching sounds.

I decided to take a break from playing for a moment to process what I just witnessed. I had a lot to digest.

The only conclusion I came to was that ghosts are real and this was the same Skye as the girl who died. Which would sound insane if I didn’t have the pictures to prove it.

I choked back tears. I was afraid. Why did Skye want me to see this?

I wanted to put the game down and be done with it. But if she had a message to give me, then I felt like I had to see it through to the end.

I guess I vainly hoped she’d pass on and find peace if I listened to what she was trying to say.

Another message when I started the game up again.

“I can’t fly. I tried to.”

I found myself at Spear Pillar. The staircase to the Hall of Origin was in front of me.

My exit was gone, so I just went straight to Arceus.

A level 100 Arceus stood before me.  

Instead of sending out my Shaymin, it stayed in the field. It was now bleeding. Its status said it was fainted, but it was still able to battle somehow.

I felt cornered. There was no way a level 14 Shaymin could take on something like this. I tried to use Fly, hoping it would give me the same result as before.

“Can’t use that here.”

It wouldn’t let me use the move. Instead, I just outright try to flee.

“Can’t escape!”

“ARCEUS used Judgment!”

I braced for impact...

“The wild ARCEUS’s attack missed!”

...But was pleasantly surprised to see it miss.

“I’m not ready yet.”

The game made me flee automatically.

The screen faded to black.

“I’m not ready. I’m not ready.”

“I’m scared.”

When the screen faded back to the overworld, I found myself in the Distortion World. The portal that takes you back to the main world was gone, so the only thing I could do was explore.

I found another Escape Rope while looking around.

It was the only thing noteworthy I could find, so I started trying to think of ways to get out of here.

I tried using Fly, since SINNER still knew it.

“There’s nowhere to fly to.”

Figures.

Trying to test my other options, I went to my bag and tried using the Escape Rope.

Of course, the “There’s a time and place for everything” message still appeared.

Deciding to mess around until I got results, I went to give the Escape Rope to SINNER.

“Don’t suppose you know what to do with this?” I muttered.

The game crashed again, and it assaulted my eardrums once more. I sharply inhaled, wondering if I touched a nerve.

I took a deep breath and started the game again.

My character’s name was now Skye.

I started in Floaroma Town. The first thing I did was rush to the Pokémon Center to check on my Pokémon in the PC. Of course, they were all gone.

I’d grieve for them later, though. Maybe Skye would be nice to me and give them back.

While I was in the center, I figured it might’ve been good to heal the faint status off of the Shaymin.

Sure it is. Glad you can tell when something is suffering, nurse.

Heading outside, I talked to the blonde NPC.

“You should always give flowers to someone who has passed away.”

“It’s rude not to.”

“You got the Gracidea!”

I was suddenly feeling very guilty for not leaving flowers before.

Wondering if I could fix the poor Shaymin in my party if I used the flower on her, I went to try it.

“It won’t have any effect.” 

Of course not.

The blonde NPC turned into my Shaymin. I spoke to her.

“That won’t help me.” 

Yeah, I thought not.

At a loss of ideas on what to do next, I absentmindedly made my way to Valley Windworks and walked around in the grass.

A wild Sky Forme Shaymin appeared.

I sent out Skye, of course.

I chose the fight option, and the battle continued without me selecting a move.

“The wild SHAYMIN used Reflect!”

“Skye’s rage is building!”

“Skye used Cut!”

“She hurt herself in her confusion!”

The Sky Form Shaymin was knocked out in one hit, despite the game telling me Skye had hurt herself.

Back on the overworld, I found the mangled parts of the Sky Forme Shaymin lying in the grass. I inspected them.

“Please put me back together.”

It gave me another prompt, and I chose yes.

The screen faded to black.

And then Skye appeared again in a black abyss, with Skymin ears and flower. My trainer was nowhere to be seen.

I checked my party to see that Skye had changed again. Her cry sounded like a distorted mix of Shaymin’s two forms.

I went back to the overworld and was unable to move. Instead, a dialogue box appeared.

“Can you hear me?”

"Thank you for caring about me.”

"I can fly now.”

“Because...”

“I love you.”

My heart skipped a beat. My hands began to shake.

“You must care about me too, right?”

“So... I’m going to stay with you.”

“I won’t leave, not without someone who loves me.”

“Will you fly away with me?”

My shaky hands went to say no. I didn’t want to be like her.

"...”

“I’ll wait for you.”

“I’ll change your mind.”

“You’re mine now.”

“You’re mine forever.”

With that last line, the game froze.

The first thing I did was take the game out of the system. I decided to drop off all my Pokémon games at the nearest GameStop. I didn’t want her talking to me anymore.

So why do I feel like she’s still here?

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Could you write headcanons for if senpai fell in love with Keith's older sister (not knowing they were related) maybe some angst with good ending?

Honestly Senpai was naïve as hell when he first started dating you.

Even though your hair was dyed blue and you had a profession in singing..he didn’t notice the similarities with a certain “rival” of his and fell in love with you anyway.

Then one day you made a suggestion.

“Oh! Have you met my little brother?”

“You have a brother?"

“Yeah! He’s working his way up in the world of music so maybe we can have a video chat.”

Senpai was thrilled to meet your brother as you set up a VC through your phone/PC--only to see Keith’s face pop up on the camera when he answers the call.

“Hey sis! How’s it......oh...”

“Wha...THIS LITTLE BRAT IS YOUR BROTHER?!!!”

“Y-You’re dating my sister????”

You had no idea why Senpai was so pissed off all of the sudden, so you quickly ended the call and confronted him about this.

“Why are you calling my brother a brat?”

“Why didn’t you tell me his name was Keith?!!! I never would’ve wanted to meet him again if I knew!!!”

“Why are you freaking out so much?! And what do you mean by “again”? Did he do something to you?”

“YES!! HE HUMILATED ME IN A RAP BATTLE!!”

“....what?”

You had no clue they ever met. But you refused to believe your sweet brother would go that far--you knew he was never the kind to bully someone just because they lost a sing-off.

Though when you try defending him and tell Senpai he was overthinking it..he got really mad.

“He’s a narcistic little shithead!! If only you saw that what blue-balled prick was really like you’d--!!!”

"Sen, an insult to the only family I have left is an insult to me. You don’t have to like him..but if this is how you’re gonna act then...I-I don’t think this relationship will work.”

Those words instantly shattered his heart. 

As he realized how much his insults affected you personally...he felt like the biggest asshole in the universe.

You were about to leave him so he could reflect on that, but then he took your hand and pulled you back--right into a tight hug.

“I-I’m..I’m so sorry, [y/n]. You know him better than I do and...I-I never should’ve assumed such things. I don’t want my past grievances to destroy what we have now in the present..p-please forgive me. I’ll never speak ill of him again.”

“....alright.” You return the hug with a sigh. “I forgive you, Keith’s a good guy. You just need to get to know him better, that’s all.”

He was relieved that you gave him a second chance. He knew he had to work on some of his..personal issues, but he was happy right now.

Within the next few days you decided to have another video chat with Keith, and Senpai was a lot nicer to him.

Despite their previous misgivings, you had a feeling the two would get along great.

[legionofpotatoes]

I love your art, it is very detailed in a neat way. Was wondering how you got started making it as a source of income? How did you get your first paid work, I'd love some advice on how to get started, if that's ok

Thank you. Of course it's okay, although I doubt I have enough work experience in art to really delve into this. I only went full freelance this year, and had been juggling art as a side hobby until then. If you're still interested in my somewhat narrow perspective, and are okay with my long-winded rambles, I'll give it a shot:

So to answer your question fully, I'll describe how I started and move into personal advice and learnings later on. As a disclaimer, I am a white cishet dude in my late twenties with a moderate cocktail of mental illnesses, but overall I can pass for a functioning adult so a lot I have to say may come laced with privilege I cannot fully identify.

So uhh I began drawing in around 2012? I think? Maybe halfway through 2011? And I mostly made fanart for things I enjoyed and tried to branch out in communities that felt nourishing to my style and interests (I caught a bug for alt posters and enjoyed mainstream movies so I spent a long time on posterspy early on). There were a handful of opportunities that came from there but I could only accept a couple because of primary workplace commitments. Still, it showed that networking in a focused community was definitely a good place to start; I myself have huge trouble committing to social networks and really staying socially active, but I knew it was an essential ingredient in succeeding so I tried to make myself be involved in challenges and art support trains etc. as much as I could.

In parallel to all that I also ran a few third party online stores (redbubble, teepublic) for disposable income and would sometimes, if rarely, hit around $100-150 a month from those sources combined. It is a sort of thing that requires helper accounts on other social media sites to promote it on, because the stores themselves have a huge volume of content that translates into low organic discoverability. Obviously it was never gonna be the way towards financial independence through art, and with community projects being few and far between, I opened private commissions in around uhhh 2017 I think, focusing on offering a few styles I knew I could do well, and sometimes operating in individual fandoms (it was mostly a bioware thing to be frank). But I had to close them back down after a year or so, again because of work-life conflict and how badly it was burning me out. The reason I kept trying to monetize this hobby is because I honestly hated what I did for my main job and wanted to see a way out in some shape or form in the future.

And then in 2020 I had to quit my main job altogether because of *gestures at pandemic* and deal with a mental breakdown from all the wonderful things it did to us and me specifically. I took a short break and decided to give art a shot full-time, and that was around May this year. I was planning on opening up commissions again (and I still am), but a few sudden opportunities that fell in my lap moved that timetable down and now I'm grateful to even be doing something I am getting adequately paid for.

So, with that somewhat limited perspective, here's what I've learned that I'd tell myself if I was just starting out:

1. Being a fan of something can be a shortcut towards effective networking kickoffs. Which are important evidently. If you love something and enjoy making content for it, join communities, settle into a combination of social media websites that feel right for those interests + your body of work + your inner rhythm, and try to play to content discovery as much as your mental health allows you to. Like I said, I know that I myself am incredibly bad at self-motivating to talk to people, so I found that synergizing common interests into fanart - which I enjoyed making anyway - could be a way to give myself a gentle nudge forward and build those bridges leading to community activities, which then net experience and coverage. Sometimes even freelance projects from official avenues. Again; picking the right spaces for what you're after is key. Companies roam twitter, concept art recruiters scour artstation or linkedin etc, instagram can land you private commissions and collab opportunities, so on and so forth. Find your niche and try to kick up dust. However...

2. I do not believe that any social profile can replace a good portfolio. The thing that made an immediate difference to me this year was building a coherent, simple website with my best work front and center and a contact form on top. Every single opportunity I got came from that form (maybe via twitter or instagram initially, but always sealing the decision after going through the website), so I firmly believe that showcasing your skills and portfolio in a visually arresting and user-friendly way is a big priority. I had some reservations about tackling that task but fortunately I had help from a savvy life partner and we slapped it together via wordpress in less than a day. Twitter/whatever social media is prevalent in your target groups is definitely important to get the right eyes on your shit, yes, but those eyes will then look for a second stop where your work and rates are more clear and concise. Simplicity is key imo, I cannot overstate this. So make a cute, simple portfolio!

3. Your skills and rates will grow and change as you do. Let them. Over the years I built several lasting professional relationships from my obsession over mass effect and kept getting opportunities both from bioware and their partner companies, some small and some a bit bigger. A one-off job earlier this year opened an unexpected door to another much larger commitment, and then the work I did there brought some attention from small businesses looking for commercial commissions. These were all incredibly different projects in terms of scope and budget, and I've been tackling them all on a case-by-case basis and slowly coming into my own irt my needs, rates, and SOW thresholds. It is still a work in progress (and a LOT of literal work as well), and very much a thing I struggle with in publicly marketing, which is why I felt a tad underqualified to answer your question in the first place (obviously I did not let that stop me). But what it means for me now is that I am rapidly developing into whatever my "version" of a functioning freelance artist is, and when the conditions for that guy are met, I need to be able to confidently plant myself and operate from that space despite past precedents. Do not let anyone bully you into downpricing what you yourself perceive as legitimate products of personal growth and development. Speaking of which...

4. The shitty challenge of turning envy into inspiration, and paddling outside your comfort zones in full riot gear. it is hard, but realizing that being a miserable, self-hating artist in my early days got me nothing but more misery back was the first real step I took and what truly blew the hinges off. I was just not pleasant to be around, I would badmouth my work all the time, and it all somehow made sense in my broken mind because the validation I sought was purely external and the way I sought it was through eliciting sympathy via self-victimization (even when I made something objectively nice). It all led fucking nowhere. Except perhaps to my own narcissism that I one day managed to identify and start managing. So I started looking at things that made me seethe with envy and calmly deconstruct and figure out their inner workings instead, do studies, and find nuggets of inspiration or discover new ways to approach rendering or building up specific elements. It was an application of analytical diligence to what I wanted to be a purely emotional, esoteric workflow, but that I deep down knew wasn't. Art is a discipline and a skill, and maybe it isn't a straight line, but you gotta find some line to thread nevertheless. Being self-hating was almost an identity I had to break out of, and despite it still being like, 4-5% there? I realize its cause and effect on me, my work, and those around me, so it is with a conscious choice that I gently set it aside when I work and especially when I learn. It won't always stay quiet, but the effort is the difference. Your doors towards accepting true growth and venturing into uncharted territories, art styles, and networking will really open from there. But there's a huge caveat...

5. Toolsets, accessibility, privilege, and all the good things that enable artistic expression and profitability are not given equal to all. you might do all the mental work I mentioned to be ready to rock and roll and learn and draw your way out of anything, but digital art is a fucking money pit that asks almost too much at times. I don't got a good case study here but identifying and ensuring accessibility to the tools you need to do your best work is, like, super important. The ergonomics can improve as you make money and settle into the job, but the basics have to be made available to you. And some of that might not even be under your direct control. That can be anything from pen tablets to software subscriptions to opportunities in hiring sullied by sexism or what have you. You gotta navigate all that through careful networking and money/time management. I don't do a good job of devoting specific slices of time to work/study, and my primary clutch is iPad software which went from a good deal to a nightmare scenario over the years. So all I can say here is do what I didn't; network, invest in a PC/tablet, and pick a software you'll learn that won't burn a hole in your pocket.

6. Be nice to work with? This one is hard to articulate and has landed my own ass in hot water in my early years because of how socially inept I am, but nothing is more worthwhile than being.. like. a good person to work with. That can be anything like meeting deadlines, or sometimes missing them but eloquently articulating why, being generous in early stages, being communicable and not too wordy in your emails, having a good grasp on abstract artistic concepts and how to describe them in simple terms, having a clear, laid out framework of your working rates in commercial and non-commercial projects and sticking to those guns with grace, understanding when you need to say no and saying it well, the works. Just being nice. Sometimes that might mean going headstrong with something you believe in, or simmering down and sucking up to the big man, all relative and adaptive. Part and parcel of the service provision dance that we all have to do in order to make bank. Know your lines here, obviously, and don't like. work for nazis. or uh.. *shudders* exposure. but be nice and empathetic and communicable and word will travel eventually. Skill may be in abundance these days, but good people are most certainly not, and capitalism has a way of bubbling up scarcity. Grim, but uh, them's the breaks.

I know I'm ultimately telling you to like. Have a body of work, make a portfolio, grow, and network. But that's really how I see it for now. And being nice can be a cherry on top that sets you apart, along with the inherent irreplaceable voice of your artwork. I think I rambled on enough, but if there is something specific you need my help with, even if you want to come off anon and talk in private, please feel free.

[phoenotopia]

The Last Phoenotopia Blog Update

(Date 2021 MAR 01)

I debated how to open this blog post, but perhaps the main crux of this blog post is the best place to start. The blog is being retired.

The purpose of this blog was to be a "development" blog for Phoenotopia, and well, Phoenotopia's development is done. I'll still be doing bug fixes and maintenance on the PC and Switch versions, and playstation and xbox ports are underway (by a publisher). But I'm not going to be making any more major changes to the game. At some point, you put the paintbrush down and say it's done. Blemishes and all.

Recent Events

The game launched on Steam last month, and like any launch, it was hectic. Bugs Galore. This is our first commercial PC launch, so it was a real baptism by fire. Unlike Switch's one configuration, the PC has multiple configurations and factors to account for. The game needed to be able to handle multiple control schemes, screen resolutions, refresh rates, and more! I had a 60Hz monitor going into launch and didn't know anything about Hz (I do now). There was a troublesome stutter that some players were sensitive to that my whole team didn't notice since our eyes compensated it away. There were a few times where in fixing something at one party's behest, it introduced problems for another party. A few times, due to disorganization, I unwittingly rolled back a fix that was meant to be applied. For some, the game couldn't play at all (really glad Steam allows refunds).

It was messy. It was tiring. I.AM.BEAT.

I think the worst of it is over... I'll still be around to do the last updates and bug fixes, but I'm ultimately ready for what's next.

SO what is next?

What isn't next... is Phoenotopia 2. As you may have heard down the grapevine, the game couldn't be what you call successful. No one's earned even minimum wage on it.

Maybe there's hope in the game's long tail. A year or two down the line... maybe. I won't hold my breath though. At some point in the past few months, I finished processing (or grieving) and it's time to move on.

The game has at least earned enough for us to continue our modest operations. As long as we don't expand the team, and we don't take another monster six-year dev cycle like what Phoenotopia took, we can continue. We'll have to be smarter and faster. Perhaps the most valuable thing we gained from all this is experience.

The Experience

It is a dev blog. Here are some of the lessons I've accumulated from this game's development.

- Have a good menu design. Menus aren't just that in-between fluff before you get to the good stuff. Menus are KEY. Your menus need to be robust, expandable, and *understandable* (to you, the developer). Because once the game's out, you will invariably be asked to add more options. And if your menu design is bad, every time you have to add a new menu option, it becomes a whole new pain all over again. Support mouse from the get-go, etc.

- Focus on features that people will actually care about. For instance, I've never seen anyone praise the camera's zoom feature. In practice, people try that feature a few times and then never use it again. But that feature was a constant consideration factor for every level. Run through it multiple times to make sure the level didn't break, think about which zoom levels made sense, resize rooms because they worked at one zoom level but not the other, and so on.

- Don't do boxes that you can move around. Other 2D platformers avoid movable boxes because they're a huge headache to program and they really complicate the game space. Enemies need to respond to boxes you throw in their path and either navigate around or attack it. When you're moving the box, you have to worry about constantly changing your collision size and reconciling when the box gets snagged on the environment. The boxes were also a constant source of bugs because people can manipulate them to soft-lock themselves and more.

- More focused script. Phoenotopia's 100,000+ word script was panned more for being bloated than it was praised for being lengthy. Long scripts take a long time to write and make the game more unwieldy, increasing the costs of translation and upkeep. Every update we're addressing some textual error or mistranslation. There are some highly renowned games (e.g. Hyper Light Drifter) that do without a script at all!

- Be flashy! A bat and a lightsaber take the same amount of work to program, but the lightsaber will draw a lot more attention and interest.

- Slopes, surprisingly! Six years ago when I started, Unity was ill-equipped for 2D games. If you used the physics that Unity provided you'd have a really floaty character that wouldn't adhere to the slope when going downhill. There were a hundred different tutorials saying different things (use forces, use move position, use translation, etc). You can get rectangular collisions done in a day, but to do slopes took weeks. Meanwhile, games can actually get by fine without slopes. Most people won't even notice. Did you know the Phoenotopia flash game didn't have slopes? Neither does Hollow Knight or Rogue Legacy. You can save yourself a lot of work by avoiding slopes.

(big entities look weird on slopes. Bad slope!)

I could write enough little knowledge nuggets like this to fill a book! But I'd rather just make the next game. 

So… what IS next?

As mentioned previously, it's not Phoenotopia 2. Pirate and I are mostly just tossing some ideas back and forth right now. We'll go silent for a year (or two). Our next game's scope will be more modest in some ways, more ambitious in others. It will definitely be more smartly designed. (There will be a map!)

We'll announce it when it's ready for the public. It might be necessary for us to do a kickstarter. I've tried to avoid kickstarters having been burnt on quite a few myself and also because I worry that mismanaging a kickstarter would earn the ire of backers.

But I did keep this blog regularly updated for six years. So I've gained some confidence in my abilities to at least manage a kickstarter well.

Is it really the last Phoenotopia Blog update though?

Okay, not really. There is some news that I'll need to announce, and this blog is one of the game's main outreach channels. Here are the events that will cause me to update the blog:

Announcing the launch of the xbox/playstation ports when they're ready

If a physical edition of the game happens

If a new language is getting introduced into the game (Korean is a high possibility)

When we're ready to talk about our next game

If (BIG IF) we begin development on a Phoenotopia sequel. I do want to do a sequel one day if we have the means and the demand is there. 

Those updates will be more on a "when they happen" basis, rather than me reporting in every couple months.

Fan Art

As always, I'm very happy to see fanart of Phoenotopia. Major thanks again to Pimez for collecting all the artwork from the corners of the internet! Since this is the "last" blogpost, Sir Pimez can finally take a rest from collecting the fanart :P

ÆV made a series of pictures that tell a story. A Pooki is humanely sheared of its wool to create a hat. The Pooki is unharmed. Nice! Gotta love Gail’s expressions.

Amagoo Mazeru makes a stunning landscape shot of a full moon and shooting stars. It’s a sharp and clear vector art. I like the faint glow of the moon and the fire and the subtle gradient in the night sky. Very skillfully done!

Hah hah. I got a chuckle out of this one. I imagine this is how Gail's enemies see her by the end of the game. CaESar made this image based on TerminalMontage's famous youtube videos. Nailed it!

CrownStar drew two pictures of Gail. I'm a big player of JRPGs, so the first shot instantly reminded me of Persona 4's art style. (Hmmm... Phoeonotopia as a JRPG... there’s potential there...) Next, Birdy is shown carried off after her defeat. I really like Birdy's expression here - she just seems mildly uncomfortable.

There's a bit of a story behind the first image. As Firanka shares it, she wasn't able to defeat the Big Eye monster at the end of the flash game, so she believed a tall tale that what awaited after was a 6 armed Kobold boss. Hilarious! The second is a rendition of the lonely Anuri elder. A rare subject. The loneliness is portrayed well here. I feel lonely just looking at it!

Koo_chop draws the clash between Gail and Katash at the top of the towers. I really like this interpretation of the game's art style. It’s faithful to the in-game graphics. And the lighting, from the glow of Gail's bat, to Katash's sword, and the lightning in the background... Amazing!

Lime Hazard shows Gail with a salute pose. Very appropriate for this occasion. I also like how there's a slight tilt in the angle that Gail is portrayed. Those dynamic angles are always hard to get right, and Lime Hazard pulled it off very skillfully. See you next mission!

Lyoung0J with a digital painting of Gail posed sitting on a rock. I like how it almost seems like she was caught in a candid moment - she’s smiling, but also feeling self-conscious. Cute! The art style really pops, and I like how Gail is sporting what I call the old anime style nose. 

MyUesrNameIsSh*t with a sketch of Gail performing a skillful slingshot. I like how Gail is depicted with her tongue out in a mischievous manner, the way all mischievous people with slingshots do.

Niitsu Kentaro returns with a 2021 Happy New Year picture. That happened didn't it? A New Year... Gail's pose gave me a chuckle with how she seems to be waving the bat around as casually as one would wave hello. And "Phoenotopiyear"... Well said! One day we'll have our Phoenotopiyear...

Ochan Nu breaks all records with a stunning NINE pictures in one session :O

There's so many goodies here. My favorite would be the one with Gail staring intently at the screen - it's like she's looking directly at you. You almost feel uncomfortable.

Next, there's an Animal Crossing villager dressed as Gail and sporting her pink hair. It even looks like a house Gail would live in. Gail is a connoisseur of the arts and likes Mona Lisa. Yes :)

There are various comics of Gail pointing out Gail's weird food habits. A picture of Fran looking really cool, and even Gail rocking a bathing suit. (bathing suit image linked here in case NSFW). Wow!

Pimez didn't just collect the arts, he creates them as well! This one, which he aptly named 'The Year 175' is a depiction of when the dragons invaded the towers as told by an elderly Daean woman. Great pixeling skills! I got a good chuckle from the ice dragon leaving with its stuff slung over its shoulder.

Quo made a stunning picture of Gail playing the flute surrounded by the 5 musical notes and the Phoenix logo behind her. The theme seems to be "fire" and it works really well. Gail herself looks awesome depicted in her red suit - it's like she's leading a marching band!

Rai Asuha depicts Gail in the late game with her red suit, and night star bat, and holding a lamp. She looks ready for adventure! I really like the white outline here and Gail's poofy shoulders here - the art style feels reminiscent of Final Fantasy Tactics.

Seri also draws Gail bearing her late game equipment. Unique to Seri's drawing is how all of Gail's equipment is accessible from a pocket on her shirt. I also like how Gail is depicted with her lucky earrings - that accessory is often forgotten.

Treedude depicts Gail with a bat and wearing a funny smirk. She looks like she's ready to hurt someone!

Warotar returns with everyone's favorite Great Drake, Bubbles! It seems so happy to be featured!

I'm really grateful for all the fanart this game has received. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!

Closing Notes

Pirate drew a picture to mark the occasion. It shows Gail enjoying a hot chocolate with marshmallows and a pumpkin muffin. A rest well-earned...

Goodbye! Until next time!