#monkey lizard :] sweet giant...
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warusaru · 4 months ago
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Mesa..
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holofizz · 9 months ago
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More music I associate with these characters because I can't help it! Brace yourself it's still somehow a large list. I'm incapable of keeping my music playlists short, this is no different.
Crawford Tillinghast
Home Sweet Home - Arkavello
Love Me Dead - Ludo
Undisclosed Desires - Muse
The Fourth Colour - King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard
The Beginning Of The Twist - The Futureheads
The Waters Rising - Oceans of Slumber
Anton Mordrid
Rule #9 Child of the Stars - Fish in a birdcage
Impermanence - Major Parkinson
(The) Coffee Song - The Toxhards
Get Up - Mother Mother
Blue Moon - Ella Fitgerald
Just Like Heaven - The Cure
John Reilly
A night to Forget - Cain's Offering
Destroy Everything You Touch - Unwoman
Oh My God - Ida Maria
Eros - Viza
Neon Sunrise - I Am Giant
3rd Planet - Modest Mouse
Herbert West
Murder Death - De Staat
Girl Anachronism - The dresden dolls
The Knack - Mother Mother
Wait - The Dear Hunter
Misery Business - Paramore
Dismantled - Nekonomicon, Kylee Brielle
Daniel Cain
Gloria - The Dear Hunter
I created a Monster - Hello Operator
Lovefool - The Cardigans
Cemetery Breeding - Black Mountain
Push Me to the Floor - The Parlotones
Angeleyes - ABBA
Jonathan/The Evil Clergyman
Missionary Man - Eurythmics
Running Up That Hill (cover) - Placebo
Heard Somebody Cry - Oingo Boingo
The Killing Moon - Echo & the Bunnymen
Like a Prayer - Madonna
Blood - Starbenders
Weyoun
Venus Ambassador - Bryan Scary
Stress - Jim's Big Ego
I'm A Princess - Bill Wurtz
The Other Me - Frost
Every You Every Me - Placebo
Monkey Tree - Mother Mother
Kevin Burkhoff
Somebody's Home - Spock's Beard
Fractions - Juniper Vale
Amazing Grace - Globus
Unwell - Matchbox Twenty
Voice in My Throat - Pearl and the Beard
Lovecraft in Brooklyn - The Mountain Goats
Milton Dammers
Devil's Plaything - Liv Sin
A Lifetime in the Service of Darkness - Ashbury Heights
Fill The Void - Oingo Boingo
People Are Strange - Johnny Hollow
¡Aikido! (Neurotic / Erotic) - Will Wood and the Tapeworms
Lecher Bitch - Genitoturers
50557
Blackest Eyes - Porcupine Tree
Can't Change Me - Chris Cornell
Laplace's Angel (Hurt people? Hurt People!) - Will Wood
The Mind Electric - Miracle Musical
Serial Killer Vibes - Cloudfodder
Prosthetic - Haken
edit: fuck it, I put it all in it's own playlist. X
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poorbrokemess · 5 months ago
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Snakes
Snakes
SNAKES
I haven't lit a candle, incense, or used my oils since the end of last month. Because snakes, and a beardie. They can't have any of that.
I dismantled all my alters for enclosures.
I haven't been able to do my routine offerings. No more fresh flowers that aren't basic roses. No more protection spray.
I have to lock BowBow out of my bedroom all the time now. If I'm not in there, neither is he. The last thing I need is him trying to eat these noodles and spikey lizard.
So him and Cleo are fighting all the time. Because how dare he be in the Queens ✨️entire house✨️ and not in his single allowed room.
Then, to add injury to insult, I bought a piece of cork bark that had mites didn't notice; didnt cook it, boiled it but not enough apparently, until I was arranging it in Brunos/Bonitas' enclosure.
SO NOW I HAVE 2 IN QUARANTINE
Brunetia is so displeased with the whole thing. *unhand me giant monkey, stop rubbing me with that awful paper shit. I hate it. Let me go home. I think paper towels are awful, so I won't go *inside the hide* despite I moved them away from any paper*.
She wants chip bottom. But I can't until I know the mite was just on that piece and weren't already breeding in there on her. As I had previously worried about it.
My brain also decided that Bruno is a female and is Bonita instead.
Why? Because the snake is barely smaller than Zero, who is at least 2 (I had to deep dive to find the first ever photo of him off of that ladies' page. Got lucky. Early April 2023, he was a baby. Way smaller than Brunetia is now at 4/6 months old.)
I really didn't want a female (reproductive such and such extra feeds, seem to be more grumpy, etc). But tis' what it is.
Was sweet enough when I was handling. Is all I care about.
✨️Brunetia✨️
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Oh dear, my partner is going to be beside herself that I'm calling it Brunetia 😅
I got Zero two matching hides because he wouldn't go inside the ones we had for him. So no new pictures of him. Hims resting finally.
I'll need to do the same for Brunetia now. Because she is on top of the ones she previously had no issue going into. [I sterilized them, no worries there]
✨️⭐️✨️⭐️ BIRDS ⭐️✨️⭐️✨️
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incorrect-mtg · 2 years ago
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Flavor Text Highlights - Mirage
<- Previous Set | Next Set ->
Funny - Pacifism
For the first time in his life, Grakk felt a little warm and fuzzy inside.
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Funny - Elixir of Vitality
“Eternal life or your money back.” —Unnamed Suq'Ata merchant, deceased
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Emotional - Reign of Terror
“I don’t know what takes them; they die around me without time to scream.” —Scout Ekemet, final journal
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Worldbuilding - The entire Love Song of Night and Day* *which I will put under a line break because it's super long AND I want to repost content from a Wizards article which is no longer available
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<- Previous Set | Next Set ->
The full poem, taken from the article of the same name originally posted in 2003 on the wizards website (here) with footnotes explaining which cards quote it.:
Love Song of Night and Day by Jenny Scott
He (Night) / She (Day)
Wrap yourself in your best bright clothes, your red and purple scarves of silk. Run with me to the festival, where we will dance until sunrise. The dwarves will beat their funny drums of zebra skins and hollowed trees, while stiltwalkers perform, and the musician blows his bamboo flute.
And late in the night, the poets and storytellers entertain, delight us with their dancing words, as we listen, clapping by the fire. Enchant me with your tale-telling. Tell about Tree, Grass, River, and Wind. Tell why Truth must fight with Falsehood, and why Truth will always win.1
I will tell my father's stories: how the giant mantis fooled Death by holding still as a felled tree; how the elephants trampled the leopard cub, and its father, though he knew, killed nine goats instead;2 how pirates gambled with a djinn and lost the thing more dear than gold.3
Tonight we'll eat a farewell feast. Cold corn porridge is not enough. Let's peel papayas, pineapples, and mangoes, drink coconut milk, and bake bananas.4 We'll dine on crocodiles, wild birds, and turtles, perhaps a hippopotamus--if only you can catch it first.
I'll build a palace made of stone. Two hippo-headed guards will serve, and tigers carry in your meals. I'll capture flying zebras for your steeds, and fill the stable with every kind of unicorn.5 Butterflies and salamanders will decorate your garden.
I'll strand long strings of beads for you, blue, the color only kings may wear. I'll carve a soapstone lioness, a wooden box to lock it in, girded with sapphire amulets, ostrich feathers, ivory. These things will protect you while I'm gone, remind you of my love for you.6
Your voice resounds like a songbird's, every word is a sweet, soft song. When you run you're graceful and swift, sleek as a powerful panther.7 Mysterious chameleon, you're a thousand women at once, sharp and strong as a lioness, yet gentle as a striped gazelle.
On this our last day together, let us walk across the grasslands. Hold my hand and let's walk slowly, seeing everything as children. Let's walk on the Daraja Plains, where leopards hang from trees, dosing, tasseled tails swaying in the shade, near villages of tree-dwelling elves.
Glorious, to walk again across the savannah with my beloved. A lion walks commandingly, a general among his troops, camped the night before a battle. A snake, colorful and coiled, loops around his bough, mischievous, hanging over the village path.
We'll find termites in their nests, hard tall towers above the plains, and point-eared cats, taking their turns, guarding their many entrances. We'll find the basket-nests of birds hanging from the acacia tree. Rhinoceroses and dragons for once will let us walk in peace.
When lightning tears the sky's dark cloak and heaven's bird beats the water on the muddy plains with its big wings, termites and frogs escape their homes toward the lamps in the nearest village. Spiders dry themselves indoors, the spotted lizards that never fall from ceilings suddenly appear.
In the forest, fires light the sky as the black clouds unfold their weight.8. The black-and-white sacred monkey holds her children to her, and waits.9 Love, like lightning hits suddenly. It sparks the heart with blows of light, its fire extending, bends, expands, beats and breaks your hiding places.
* * *
Remember when we were children, herding the sheep together, leading them over the grassy hills with long sticks. Your silly songs made me laugh, and in the evening, you'd enchant me with your stories, lying on your back beside me. Even then my heart was yours.
I remember your sacred rites. You were so funny, so grown up, so stiff and serious, all arms and elbows. You went in a girl, but you returned a warrior. You marched back with the others-- your hair was cut, your eye tattooed with the red triangle of war.10
Tomorrow I must go, my love. I will tattoo my head with braids. My shield will bear a shining sun so you will always be with me. Inlaid with gold, it will shine like glowing embers.11 I will return with lizard skins for your sandals. Paint your eyes black and wait for me.12
I am the sun, you are the moon. Wherever you lead I will go, following across the wide sky, as long as I live and you love. Sun follows Moon until she tires, then carries her until she's strong and runs ahead of him again.13 I'll carry you, too, my beloved.
My love, we are not Sun and Moon. Instead we are like day and night. The old ones say Day is a woman, who works only while it is light. She herds her goats and catches fish, fills her fields with golden corn, shows her children what is just and protects them from the cobra.
Day loves Night, who works in darkness, walking through heaven's milky sky collecting stars with his quick arms, piling them into a basket like a child collecting lizards and piling them into her pot until the pot overflows with lizards, 'til the basket overflows with light.
Night wears a black cloak lined with fire, studded inside with gleaming stars. At dawn and dusk he spies his love. Across the rolling hills of sky, they glimpse each other--so briefly. They throw each other kisses, cry. Their tears spill over Jamuraa. Mixed with blood, they wash everything red.14
But once, with a magician's help, Time was stopped and Day stood still.15 Night spread over Jamuraa, wrapped Day in his dark cloak and held her. In their miraculous embrace, the two became as One. Until pulled from Day's arms, Night sank, commanded by the western horizon that always beckons him to come.
I won't give up hope, my love.
Our love is like the river in the summer season of long rains: For a little while it spilled its banks, flooding the crops in the fields.16 But soon it will evaporate with the dry heat. Like Day from Night, I'll live my life apart from you, just glimpsing you across the sky, because you cannot change, my dear, and nor can I.17
[1] "Enchant me…" - Village Elder, Mirage [2] "I will tell my father's stories… how the elephants…" - Wild Elephant, Mirage [3] "…pirates…" - Kukemssa Pirates, Mirage [4] "Tonight…" - early harvest, Mirage and Sixth Edition [5] "I'll capture…" - Zebra Unicorn, Mirage (note that "flying" was changed to "gentle" on the card.) [6] "These things…" - Remedy, Visions and Sixth Edition [7] "When you run…" - Panther Warriors, Visions [8] "In the forest…" - Flare, Mirage [9] "The black-and-white…" - simoon, Visions [10] "…you returned a warrior… your hair was cut…" - Zhalfirin Knight, Mirage [11] "My shield…" - blinding light, Mirage [12] "I will return…" - Femeref Knight, Mirage [13] "Sun follows…" - Chariot of the Sun, Mirage [14] "Their tears…" - Mortal Wound, Visions [15] "But once…" - Sands of Time, Visions [16] "Our love…" - Summer Bloom, Visions [17] "Like Day from Night…" - Unfulfilled Desires, Mirage
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juanarc-thethird · 1 year ago
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Ok then, let's do this.
LAST SONG? - "Lemon Swayze" by Kunzite. I kind of became obsessed with this song after finishing Dead Island 2.
FAVORITE COLOR? - Purple.
CURRENTLY WATCHING? - Black Clover. It's fun to watch.
LAST MOVIE? - A fucking giant monkey, along with a giant lizard, beating the shit out of other giant monkeys. (Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire)
SWEET/SPICY/SAVORY? - Spicy, always. Is in my blood!
RELATIONSHIP STATUS? - Living the extravagant life as a bachelor~😎
CURRENT OBSESSIONS? - Anything related to the supernatural. Fiction or Real, I don't care. I will always look that up.
LAST THING YOU GOOGLED? - Rib recipes that use siracha.
@true-king-of-monsters @tired1mmortal @superiorsturgeon @dragonotaku-justineverything @howlingday @riku-izanami
NINE PEOPLE I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW BETTER
OMG TYSM FOR TAGGING ME @liass-21 !!!!! i am so sorry i drafted this tag and i thought i queue'd it and i didnt so 😭😭😭 its only like a month late. its fine everythings fine. aaaaaa 😭
LAST SONG? - "photograph" by the midnight! it is on my writing-for-top-gun playlist bc it has huge maverick vibes lol.
FAVORITE COLOR? - pink!!!! also lighter purples and blues and most pastel shades <3 and black
CURRENTLY WATCHING? - a streamer i have never watched before playing the remaster of of tomb raider i-iii bc i am excited about the remaster!! and those games are my childhood <3 not to be a million years old or anything sakfhfjfhg
LAST MOVIE? - unfortunately it was 'oz the great and powerful' 😭 if any of y'all enjoyed that movie i respect it, but i had to see it on tv at a friend's house and we were having a great time laughing at the very unexpected writing and acting choices being made lol
SWEET/SPICY/SAVORY? - aaaaaaaa i guess savory ?????? but sweet has a special place in my heart ajdhfjfhfjg
RELATIONSHIP STATUS? - committed long term relationship to ~my person~ <3<3
CURRENT OBSESSIONS? - well this is gonna be obvious but top gun primarily !!!! additionally, dan and phil !! mission impossible !!! fall out boy!! and even if the current obsession level is not as high as other things, i am always at least partially obsessed with a hundred other things and people that i am probably posting about at the same time lol
LAST THING YOU GOOGLED? - “oz the great and powerful reviews” bc i wanted to make sure that im not crazy and that other ppl also felt that movie was an insane fever dream (apparently due to the 44% on metacritic i guess they did lol)😭
tagging: aaaaaa @brambleberrycottage @daffodilstark @tellhound @torchflies @melancholydandelion @goosefilms @driftershunt @downthegenderriver @callsignstingray
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wayward-delver · 4 years ago
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The Unconventional Zoo of Little Nightmares
Little nightmares is a series of the cute, bizarre, and terrible. But moreover it thinks outside the box. So if I am thinking of animals, I should do the same.
(Disclaimer, I have nothing against these these species. Most of these descriptions are symbolic.)
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Six is a Perentie/Goanna Monitor Lizard: Cold-Blooded, Cunning, highly unpredictable, ravenous, and exceedingly brutal hunters. They start out small, frail, and inconspicuous but given the chance, they will grow into something deadly. They can be bonded with, however, they’re empathy is difficult to reach.
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Mono is a Honey Badger: Bold, single-minded determination, stubborn, faithful, and as brave as they come. Will stand up to even the most terrifying of opponents when their partners are in need.
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Runaway Kid/Seven is a Spotted Genet: Clever, nimble, cute, timid, and unapologetically sweet. A pure cinnamon roll that doesn’t get the love it deserves.
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The girl in the Raincoat/Veronica is a Meerkat: A smart, kind, resourceful, and capable survivor. But when alone and rejected, they’re without hope.
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The Children of the Maw: (in order from left to right)
Refugee Kid/One is a Brown Hyena: A loner whose a lot braver than it looks.
Long-Haired Girl/Two is a Red Fox: Smart and reliable, looked to as an example.
Green Boy/Five is a Fennec Fox: It’s just a little pup.
Hunchback Girl/Three is an Argentine Tegu: Big, round, and beautiful.
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The Pale City Kids:
Lollipop Boy is a Bear cub: They maybe fearful, but they’re only the one to beat back Bullies with one steady hand.
Bleeding/Pigtailed Girl is a Lab Rabbit: A determined survivor who doesn’t give up despite their ailing body.
Blanket/Ghost Child is a Flapjack Octopus: This was purely for aesthetics.
The Toddler is a Burrowing Owlet: A little bird not quite ready to fly, waiting in their nest to grow.
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The Lady is a Red-Crowned Crane: A vain creature of high standards, her elegance and grace makes her stand out from the lower beasts. But with this beauty and power is tempered with fragility.
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The Janitor/Roger is a blind Orangutan: Calm, creative, and distant. They likes to keep his world at arms length.
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The Twin Chefs are hippos: From a distance, they seem doughy, cumbersome, and one foolish soul might say goofy. But they are far more temperamental and dangerous than they came imagine... and they will outrun you!
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The Guests are Elephant Seal: The mental image speaks for itself.
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The Granny is a Snapping Turtle: Impossibly old, lurking the deepest darkest depths. Patient and bitter, unwilling to let go.
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The Hunter is an American Alligator: A nocturnal, swamp living, territorial, persistent, bear-trap predator with an itchy trigger.
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The Teacher is a barn owl: Strict, uptight, and silent rage. No vermin escapes her piercing gaze, hearing their shrill means certain doom.
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The Doctor is an upside down sloth bear: Huffing, puffing, seemingly gullible, but don’t be fooled. They are anything but comical.
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The Viewers are Moths/Bugs to an open flame: Blind to their own demise.
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The Patients are Taxidermies: Once they’re real living beings, now their fake replicas of skin, stuffing, and plastic. 
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The Bullies are Monkeys, Kea Parrots, Cats, and Tasmanian Devils: Wild, playful, destructive, noisy, conniving, and cruel little beasts. They’ll take any opportunity to cause and mayhem when no one’s their to stop them.
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Thin Man is a Maned Wolf: Not a real wolf, not even a fox. One of a kind, but is so easily forgotten.
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The Pretender is a Cockatoo: Loud, boisterous, playful, pretty, vain, and incredibly proud. But secretly just as much destructive, irritable, and potentially cruel as the Bullies.
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The Craftsman is a Gibbon: Nothing really to saw here, another long armed ape but not as cool as the Orangutan. 
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The Butler is a Marabou stork: Silent and proper, carrying themselves with subdued pride. But their is anything but gracious to anyone but their mistress.
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The Ferryman is a Wandering Albatross: A enigma at best, and haunting presence at worst. But in some ways could a blessing over a curse.
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The North Wind is an Argentavis: A malevolent force, older than any other. Preying upon the weaker, with such power the “weak” are ill defined.
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Mirror Monster is a Giant Squid: A faceless monster from the void.
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The Nomes are House Geckos: Small, cute, completely helpless, and overall insignificant who while thriving will never the power to ever go beyond the shadows.
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nataliedanovelist · 4 years ago
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GF & MvsM - Wanna Talk About Dinos?
This crossover was inevitable. It just works too well. Maybe one day i’ll write a fic about how the folks at Gravity Falls handled the robot-apocalypse. Probably shrugged it off. “Eh. We’ve had worse.” Haha! What if Stan and Ford, cuz they were out sailing, had no clue what happened and when they came back they were like, “Wait, what?”
For now, please enjoy this fic of Aaron making a new friend...
(credit goes to @stephreynaart for her OC Jacob) ~~~~~~~~~~ “Hi, would you like to talk to me about dinosaurs?”
Aaron asked this question more times than he could keep track of, but that wasn’t going to stop him from asking it. It started as a dare from his big sister two years ago, but now it’s a fun hobby. When fifth grade isn’t overwhelming him, scaring him with mountains of homework and horror stories about how hard middle school is going to be, and when he’s run out of YouTube videos to catch up on, he is on the hunt for fellow giant-lizard-lovers like a hungry Ceratosaurus.
“No, okay bye.” But it did get a little tiring to always cross out names and phone-numbers on the phone book with red ink. Hey, a dinosaur of a way to find phone-numbers was appropriate. He read the next number, dialed it, and after a ring or two he asked, “How would you like to talk with me about dinosaurs? No, okay thank you.”
Aaron crossed out another name and sighed, taking a break since he reached the end of a line of numbers. Maybe he should just be grateful for Abbey and accept that no one else wants to talk about the Jurassic Period. Or the Cretaceous Period. Or the Triassic Period. But then a big, old, gray-tinted ad distracted him. He grinned, thinking it would at least be fun to give them a call, and he dialed the number.
Private home phone-numbers were fun, but businesses were also fun! Poor, bored workers would gladly talk to him rather than crabby Karens, and they got paid for it! So Aaron smiled as the phone rang, and he grinned when someone picked up.
“Thanks for calling the Mystery Shack, you’re talking to Mr. Mystery himself! How may I befuddle or bewilder you?”
“Hi! How would you like to talk with me about dinosaurs?”
“Oh, dude! I’d love to, but I’m scheduled for a tour of the Oddity Museum in three minutes.” The man said, and Aaron grinned continuously, because it sounded like Mr. Mystery really wanted to talk with him about dinosaurs. “But hey! Can you hold on for one minute, I think I know a guy!”
“Yeah, sure mister!” And Aaron was greeted by the sound of a catchy jingle about buying t-shirts and mugs and snowglobes. He smiled and wiggled his feet along to the music as he looked outside at the beautiful late-fall afternoon, entertained while he waited.
~~~~~~~~~~
Soos was on the hunt. He planned out the house in his head. Abuelita was taking a nap upstairs, Melody was organizing the upcoming tour, and Stan took Jacob out for ice cream, so he might be…
The owner of the Shack grinned when he stopped at the doorway and saw the man he was looking for, sitting in Stan’s chair, reading a book.
“Uncle Ford!”
The old sailor smiled up at the young man. “Yes, wh-...”
“Do you think you could answer the phone for me? I have a tour and I think this customer’s request is right up your alley.”
“Uh… sure, but w-...”
“Thanks, you’re the best!” And Soos was gone before he could address Ford’s confusion.
Ford was a bit lost, having little to no business with business, but he had learned at this point to trust Soos, so he picked up the phone beside him and was immediately greeted with a sweet, “How would you like to talk with me about dinosaurs?”
Ford grinned and closed his book. “I would love to! All three periods are equally as fascinating to study, but the Triassic contains some of my favorite dinosaurs!”
A young voice gasped on the other line. “Mine, too! Everyone thinks the Jurassic period is so great, and it’s pretty cool, but the Triassic gave us Plateosaurus and the Brachiosaurus!”
“That’s very true! You know, it’s very interesting, maybe depictions don’t include feathers at all, which is a bit frustrating, but perhaps after the news has spread they will incorporate more feathers on merchandise and textbooks.”
“YES! That’s what I wanna do when I grow up, help draw better-accurate dinosaurs!”
~~~~~~~~~~
The phone rang on Sunday. The Shack was closed today, so Stan lazily answered it and was greeted with, “Wanna talk about dinosaurs?”
“Sixer, phone for you!”
Ford ran into the living room, elbowed his twin out of the chair, and took the phone. “Hello again, Aaron! Now, where were we? Right, so Australopithecus. … No, I don’t think… Oh! No, homo habilis was erect, Australopithecus was never fully erect.”
“Maybe he was nervous.” Stan groaned, getting to his feet.
Ford shot him a look as thankfully the young boy on the other end didn’t catch that and happily shared some more fun-facts about homo habilis.
~~~~~~~~~~
While most college students were excited for Spring Break so they could get drunk or lose their virginity, Katie was excited because her family had planned a special secret roadtrip. She was careful to keep up with her family and talk to her parents and brother frequently, but Aaron had a hobby he wasn’t talking about that his parents found out and were thrilled about. Aaron had made another friend.
Rick and Katie did some research and the tourist attraction sounded right up their alley! In the middle of the woods, tons of weird stuff, and a fun roadtrip filled with diners and attractions. They decided to surprise Aaron, and they made up a lie that they would spend Spring Break in California with Katie so she could show her family around San Francisco, when in actuality they would be traveling up the state to the Redwood Highway and see the oddity place, and maybe even allow Aaron to meet his new pen-pal. Or, um, phone-pal.
So after bombarding Katie with hugs the Mitchells threw her luggage into the car and drove off. Aaron turned to Katie and excitingly asked, “So where are we going first? Can we go fix the Golden Gate bridge by painting it gold?”
Katie laughed and ruffled his hair. “Maybe later, right now I wanna show you guys this fun store right outside of town. Here, check out the videos I made for my classes!” And she pulled out some airpods and gave one to Aaron.
“Cool!”
Rick and Linda smirked at each other as they drove north. By the time they reached a little diner in Redding, CA, it was very clear to Aaron that they weren’t in San Francisco anymore. “Come on, just tell me where we’re going!” The boy begged as he fed Monchi a fry.
“The best kind of prizes are the surprises.” Linda quoted.
“Eric, Deborahbot5000, where are we going?”
“Sorry, Aaron, we cannot give that information.” Eric said, he and the other robot sitting politely in their seats, happy to be a part of the social interaction.
“Yes, Mother will bury us if we disobey.” Deborahbot said matter-of-factly.
“What?! No I won’t, sweeties.”
“Won’t you ground us?”
The family laughed and Aaron let the topic go; if he was honest, he loved a good surprise. The big family stopped in a motel just at the California-Oregon border, and the next morning after muffins and coffee and orange juice they were on the road again, passing dozens of trees that made Rick feel at home. Katie happily recorded the trip, trusted to be the documenter for another fun roadtrip, with hopefully not as much mortal peril.
Aaron watched as they left the highway for a simple road, and they passed a big sign. The boy gasped and caught what was happening. “No WAY! Really?!”
“You know, I hear this Mystery Shack even has a Sasquatch.” Rick commented while Linda pulled out a pamphlet from the glove box.
“It says here it’s full of odd things you’ll never see anywhere else, even a dinosaur footprint…”
“Wasn’t there a rumor of there being a Bottomless Pit?” Katie asked, pointing her camera at Aaron to get his reaction.
“Thank you thank you THANK YOU!!!” Aaron cheered, hugging his Dad’s neck and kissing his Mom’s cheek.
“Hey, no worries, buddy.” Rick eased, fixing his shewed glasses. “We wanted to see this place, too!”
“Why don’t we eat a quick lunch and then we’ll take the backroad for the attraction? There’s a coupon in here for a diner made from a giant log!”
And so after being served by a pretty blonde teenager at Greasy’s, they drove through town to get to the backroad. Signs made them confident that they were going the correct way, as well as Eric and Deborahbot5000’s GPS. Then as they turned a corner, a big triangle-shaped building came into view. Aaron grinned at the giant sign with a missing letter. People were already leaving, arms full of souvenirs and one or two already wearing their new hats or t-shirts. Once Rick parked in the Free Parking Lot, Aaron spilled out of the car and ran for the shack, but he stopped.
Katie caught up to him and patted his back. “You cool, man?”
Aaron shrugged, holding his hands in front of him and his shoulders up to hide his face a bit. “I-I dunno… What if… What if he doesn’t like me?”
“Hey, I get it.” Katie admitted. “When I first met my friends I was really nervous. I had talked to them online for weeks and I was worried it wasn’t gonna be what it was all cracked up to be, but it was. Your system worked! You found another dino-lover! You earned this moment. Just take in a deep breath and be yourself, cuz you’re a pretty cool dude.”
Aaron smiled up at his big sister. “Thanks.”
Trusting Eric and Deborahbot5000 to watch Monchi and make sure he used the bathroom, the Mitchells went inside the shack. On the porch there was an ice cooler, a sign reading schedule times for tours of the Oddity Museum, a Help Wanted sign, and two rocking chairs with a game of checkers between them.
Inside the store a few customers filled up the gift shop, alongside t-shirts, snowglobes, a vending machine, a door beside ti that read Employees Only, a bookshelf full of comic on one side and old newspapers claiming alien sightings on the other, a fish tank holding a monkey-mermaid, and barrels full of spaceship keychains and dino claws. A new section called Camping Stuff caught Rick’s eye, selling backpacks, lanterns, flashlights, batteries, canteens, and compasses. Katie opened a comic called Lil’Stanley and laughed at the swears, taking a pic and sending it to her friends’ group chat. Linda looked into the barrel full of patches and grinned at all the fun designs, while Aaron stared happily at the mer-monkey.
The Employees Only door opened and closed and Rick watched as a man in a suit, fez, and eyepatch walked up to the lady at the register and kissed her cheek. The woman smiled lovingly and left while the guy who resembled a gopher checked a customer out. Rick waited until the buyer left to approach the register, leaning an arm on the counter.
“Welcome to the Mystery Shack, dude!”
“Thanks! So, this is gonna sound weird, but my son Aaron talks to a guy here about dinosaurs…”
“No way!” The owner interrupted excitedly. “Good to see you, dudes! I’m Mr. Mystery! Wow, you guys came a long way, huh?”
“Nah, only from California. My daughter is attending art school there.”
While the men chit-chatted and Linda joined them, Katie noticed a guy walking up to Aaron and looking at the mer-monkey. She smiled and tried to read the comic without being too nosy, but she kept her senses on her brother.
“Hm, quite fascinating, isn’t it?” The man in the blue hoodie said. “But I think my favorite is the fossilized footprint. Could be Nanuqsaurus hoglundi.”
“The Polar Bear Lizard?” Aaron clarified, touching his chin as he looked at the dino-print, his back to the man he was talking to. “Maybe, but they’re from Alaska. It’s possible plate tectonics did cause some fossils to be relocated here, but it could also be a Nanotyrannosaurus lancensis footprint.”
“The Dwarf Tyrant? Could very well be. Would you like to talk about dinosaurs after your tour?”
Aaron’s eyes widened as the voice was finally familiar to him. He turned and looked up to find an old man smiling up at him. He had fluffy gray hair with a white stripe running around his scalp, wrinkles by his eyes due to smiling, a cleft chin, glasses, and wore a blue hoodie with a maroon sweater underneath. His hands were behind his back and he smiled down at Aaron warmly, while the boy was jittery and overly-excited. He took in a sharp breath and had to fight every muscle to keep from leaping through the screen door. 
“H-H-Hi…” He peeped. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Y-Yeah, sure! I’d love to! I’m Aaron! Er, wait, you already knew that.” And he held out a hand to shake.
His phone-pal, Ford, chuckled and got on one knee to be eye-level. “Greeting, Aaron! It’s nice to formally meet you.”
Aaron shook his hand and noticed something. He had six fingers on his right hand. A quick glance told Aaron he also had six fingers on his left hand. Aaron grinned with sparkling eyes at his new friend, while the old sailor smiled warmly at the boy that reminds him of his niece and nephew when they were young.
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therealvagabird · 4 years ago
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Worldbuilding Ask! "Are there domesticated house pets? What animals? How are they fed and otherwise cared for?"
Worldbuilding Ask Game
There are many typical house pets as well as some more exotic ones. In the western lands of Arius like Tiber and Theod dogs and cats are considered common, while in the east monkeys and parrots might also be owned without it seeming too eccentric.
Verg are fond of many species of large underground insects, such as the house-beetle or domestic giant cricket.
Ava are known for keeping tidal pool gardens, but also train certain animals like seals, dolphins, and sharks as aquatic equivalents to certain land animals.
Emim rear large mountain goats and wildcats and treat them as if they were sweet little companions despite being the size of most typical livestock.
Jia are known to keep company with bats, wolves, rats, boars, and sometimes large moths or spiders. However sometimes these are cases of true domestication and other times they merely occupy the same space and tolerate each other.
Hyldun are fond of rodents like rabbits in addition to typical pets, as well as fancy pigs.
Myaatu may keep many local species of cats and dingos as pets, and may sometimes joke that they are actually related by blood. Foreigners who make these jokes should not expect a friendly reaction, however.
In Dameseka, home to many Asur and humans, there can be found immense quantities of feral cats, dogs, rats, pigeons, and reptiles like watersnakes and lizards.
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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago
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Legend of the Three Cablleros: Nazca Racing and Mexico A-Go-Go
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Saludos Amgios and welcome back to The Ride of the Three Caballeros! And we’re almost at the finish line! After this reviews only 4 episodes, 2 reviews and a top 12 list/celebration of this long and fun as hell journey, this one for free to thank kev for paying for all these reviews and because without him this probably woudlnt’ of happened for some time and I thank him for that. Point is we’re so close I can taste it to being finished here so with nothing else to cover, after the cut we’re diving right into adventure.. literally. 
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Nazca Racing: 
So we open at the outside of Sheldgoose Manor as while we’re not at the scene of the action YET, the show has kept it’s tendency to have intresting intros as it goes on. Point is Xandra is incredulous about the guys claims of a magic barrier.. for some reason. Seriously Sheldrake is a powerful sorecerer, has a lair, even if they don’t know about that part, why WOULDN’T his place be shielded from you guys? Still she has to test it punchiing it , arrowing it and throwing a rock at it.. and the rock does take out a window prove it even if i’ts vandalism but that wasn’t a crime thousands of years ago and no one saw them so we good. 
Our heroes brainstorm back at the Cabana what to do, ignoring the girls suggestion that since the cabs can’t get through the barrier they can but are ignored because ... I dunno. I seriously dont’ know, they haven’t treated the kids like this before or since. Also if you were wondering why not humphrey, spark of life. Too risky. But this discourse is interupted as there’s a signal in peru. The trap has been sprung and the girls warn it might be since they KNOW the cabs will show up where they are and have time to plan but are brushed off. We also get the start of a thread with Jose as he gives all his money to some kittens who are actually con artists. Turns out that’s WHY he’s poor: he gets money easily but donates it all to bogus charities. You know like Louie’s kids or PETA. It’s a nice character trait, showing despite being a lady’s man and having a bit of an ego.. he’s still a very good guy if very, VERY gullible. Hopefully it comes up againa s this smacks of a flaw brought up and solved in one episode, and while ti’s adressed her it really dosen’t get resolved, but with 5 episodes left after this I HIGHLY doubt it. 
So our heroes are off to the Nasca lines of having gotten there with the help of a shady pilot... instead of you know.. porting there.. but given the Nazca Lines are best seen from air according to wikipedia and best shown off that way, as well as the fact it’s revealed you can enter the realm the creatures represented in the lines inhabit via plunging into it, it does make sense. She could’ve TOLD them all this before going but this is one of her off days. The Nazca Lines are a real life set of geoglypys that look really damn cool, and show up in all sorts of works, the two off the top of my head are Mega Man Starforce 2 where their used as the basis for the villians, and Yu-Gi-Oh! 5ds, where there used for the basis for the earthbound immortals.. also villians, a series of powerful and evil gods, and naturally represented by cards, that bring people back from the dead to serve as their avatars, known as the dark signers. 
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As you can see they also look really fucking awesome. Sadly I have not had a deck with them as I haven’t really thought about it and you need a field spell to keep them alive, but still good stuff. Really need to watch that arc in full some day. 
Point is the plane starts to fall apart because the pilot swindled them, or rather Jose, and they have to jump without a parachute as there’s only one. Xandra of course leaps first forgetting her friends don’t have god strength or durability and will just go squish if her logic doesn’t pan out. Panchito naturally leaps without thinking and Jose decides why not and sky captain and the crappy plane he bought for 5 bucks decides to snatch the parachute so Donald’s forced to leap.  It does work though and we do get one of the best parts of the series thus far: our heroes are drawn in chalk which is beautiuflly animated and a really creative idea. Granted the magic chalk thing dosen’t make a LOT of sense given the lines are carved in.. but at the same time we’re talking about three talking birds and a goddess chasing after an overweight one percenter, his talking staff and said talking staff’s son/lover/donkeybatmonkeyrat. Exact accuracy to real life can be waved just a smidge. Point is they find Mono, a monkey and one of the guardians of the lines, who Feldrake apparently trapped, though Xandra is suspcious. NOW, after their already in the trap basically. 
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But yeah Mono tells them Feldrake is going after the Nazca Gyroscope, a device at the center of the earth that keeps the earth orbiting the sun. 
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Point is our heroes have to stop him though Xandra is again suspcious as Feldrake wants to conquer the world not destroy it....  forgetting the whole lava lizard scheme... just.. seriously what was his plan there. rule over a pile of ashes.. actually given Feldrake’s competence and intellegence so far. that’s probably exactly it. Why is Sheldgoose the one getting called fool a lot again?
So we get another really stellar Musical Number, draw the line as our heroes progress through the Nazca world. Also I forgot to mention but earlier, in a nice bit of setup, we set up both that jose is a talented artist, which comes in handy here, while donald struggles and doubts himself. Can.. .can relate. Say that a lot but REALLY can relate. They end this wonderful song easing on down the road while our villians watcht hem.. instead of you know going ahead up and erasing them as is their plan. 
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Meanwhile, the trips sneak into Sheldgooses mansion trying to find some sort of evil scheme or lair or some clue they can use. But instead june, looking for some secret in the money vault, instead is caught by security so a chase insues and our heroines spend the episode barely outrunning the security dogs.. who SHeldgoose apparently raised. 
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Don’t.. DON’T want to think about THAT any longer than I have to. Point is they find Feldrake’s hidden lair we saw in the second episode where Sheldgoose found the staff. Not bad stuff, just really not something I need to spend an hour recapping. 
So our heroes continue along encountering Hanzy, another guardian with giant hands who they free from a finger trap.. and her reasoning is both adorable and chucklesome, as Sheldgoose, having a piece of the chalk, drew a finger trap and never having had one in her size she just had to try it. So the party gains another member as they tread carefully past the spider, the final guardian and one who will eat them without a second thought.  With that they reach the gyroscope.. and Mono turns on the cabs revealing Sheldgoose tricked him into thinking they were the bad guys and this is naturally a trap. And that is part of the episodes problem: the tension from “well their walking straight into a trap” is kinda.. nonexistant. OUr heroes ran in blind, and even when suspicious in the liens being on their guard amounts to nothing and we know from last episode this is a trap. It’s one thing to have a plan turn out to be a trap for the heroes or for the villians, as we’ll see later this week, that’s fine.. but either the audience isn't aware or there’s general tension from our heroes not knowing. Here there’s none of that. 
So our heroes are trapped in a cage while Sheldgoose and Feldrake head up top to erase them, as if their drawings on hte line, the way they came in are erased so are they. It’s a good plan.. and the tension is dissipated again as hanzy just casually tosses the cage off, mono apologizes and our heroes use the chalk to draw themselves flying machines, with Donald only having a balloon and a basket. Comedic gold.  Despite once again any dramatic tension this episode evaporating like ..t ears in the rain? I dunno I don’t have a metaphor that works here. Despite this the race is genuinely thrilling with sheldgoose busting out a shark rocket launcher since neither Feldrake nor Xandra’s magic work in the lines. Nice touch by the way. But he runs out of chalk (”You should’ve learned how to conserve space!”) though our villians reach the exit first by unleashing the spider, who Jose tries to smooth talk into not eating them.. and Donald, like me afriad of spiders, iconically shouting “KILL IT, KILL IT WITH FIRE!”
The heels erase Hansy, which is genuinely sad. Our heroes do escape in time though before he can get them and while Feldrake makes a speech in an awesome moment, Xandra just.. ignores it and fills him full of arrows.. well the g rated equilvent about that, I don’t think any of us want to see Wayne Knight bleed buckets. I”m still not over that scene from Jurassic Park where we saw nothing but I imagined it all right.. I.. imagined it *shudders*
So i’m scared for life but our heroes are free and revive hanzy with the chalk and we get a really sweet payoff to Donald’s trouble drawing as his new finger for her is a bit crooked but she loves it. It shows even if your art isn’t as good as other people’s it’s still worth something. A nice message. Feldrake once again berates Sheldgoose who points out the cabs can escape death again and again... giving Feldrake the idea to go talk to death personally. And yeah these teases... while I get this series was made for streaming.. they keep hurting the story slightly like they did here. Though I will give them credit this one.. ends up ratcheting up the tension next time so props. 
Final thoughts on Nazca Racing:  This one was decent. The animation was gorgeous and always the jokes were top notch, and the subplot was a nice opportunity for the triplets to take the stage and have an adventure.. but the plot banks a lot on our heroes walking into a very obvious trap and that just sours things for me. Still it’s not a bad episode like “World Tree Caballeros” or “No Man is an Easter Island” for the reasons stated above. And there was no daisy for an episode so while I badly wanted to find out how she’d react to the events last episode, we also got a break from her being bitchzilla, queen of monsters for an episode.. for an episode. “Sigh”
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Mexico-A-Go-Go:
Okay back on form. Our heroes return home to find.. a conspiracy board all around the house. 
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Sadly it’s not that but it turns out the girls haven’t slept since the mansion and while Donald objects to their breaking and entering, they soon reveal what htey found: The Sheldgooses have all been linked to eveyr major disaster over the centuries... ever since Feldrake, who we see as a mortal for the first time, holding his OWN book as a counterpart to the heroes. They also uncovered a connection to Clinton coot and the sheldgooses but don’t have time to elaborate before Donald waves them off to check his messages.  Unsurprisingly it’s Daisy who says “In light of recent events” i.e. you know seeing Donald’s friend save her life, dapper abandon her and seeing donald fight an evil sorcerer and wrangle a bear, to give him one more second chance. 
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Yeah i’ve spent a good chunk of this series complaining about Daisy.. and given she appears in the final two episodes i’m probably not finished. But this is just.. wow. So now she KNOWS, if not all the details that Donald and his friends are entangled in something big and scary, that involves a lives bear and actual fucking magic, so that his ducking out on her last time was NOT him being irresponsible or going to hang with his pals or something stupid, but probably something pretty important, she’s not fully aware of everything but she’s aware ENOUGH to know Donald really is making something of himself or at least is trying and really didn’t mean to mistreat her.. and she STILL is giving him fucking ultimatums!
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I just.. i’m so done with this whole fucking subplot. All of it. Not just Daisy, Donald constnatly having a moan about loosing her and whining about going on missions to save the world instead of keeping this ungrateful, bossy, self esteem shattering, shrill, selfish, gold digging, impossibly high stand’s keeping big gulp full of bitch. 
Donald.. buddy YOU CAN DO BETTER. Xandra’s right there and even if she’s not interested there’s a WHOLE TOWN of rich, eligible ladies. Go woo one of them! it’s hard getting out there, believe me I know, it’s VERY hard and i’ll probably die alone.. but your a good man, you have good friends. Friends who’ve screwed up yes but good friends to wingman and wingwoman for you. Just... leave Daisy behind. It’s not good for your mental health to keep bending over backwards for someone who wants you to be something you’ll NEVER be. Who wants someone sophisticated and with a steady job.. and the latter part’s never going to happen now your a Caballero, and given that’s more important.. good! If she can’t see what you do or won’t take the time to fucking listen... MOVE. ON. I know moving on’s hard but you have to. For your own health. Staying stuck in place over a person just hurts you and them. 
And as for Daisy..  this is easily the worst version of the character. And I went into this FULLY KNOWING this version was bad, FULLY KNOWING she was going to be grating and some of the things she’d pull like Dapper thanks to spoilers. It’s why I held off watching this for so long.. and turns out while it was worth it, the series is quite good, my fears were JUSTIFIED and no amount of reading it could prepare me for how terribly written and horribly damaging this all is.  And I do mean damaging: Kids pick things up from media. And while I should’ve caught on sooner, can’t fully blame a cartoon, I did as a kid and teen get my idea of romance from cartoons and tv and thus got the idea that pining after someone in secret was okay and they’ll come around eventually and starring at them and what not is entirely fine and not creepy. Of course it isn’t, of coure you have to say something, and of course you have to let it go if there with someone else. I know that NOW, and there have been much better geek gets the girl plots. .but it still seriously fucked with my autistic brain’s view on friendships with women, something I still struggle with at times.  And that’s why I take this shit seriously: Because while thankfully I never bought into THAT , shit where “it’s okay if it’s a WOMAN, abusing a MAN”. Men can be abused to. It’s why we had SO SO MANY unfunny stalker characters in the 2000′s, and so many plots like this where the guy is wrong.. because h’es male and his partner being domineering and expecting him to change everything without doing anything for them or treating them as an equal.. is just not okay.  And it speaks to a bigger problem.. out of touch writers who assume because THEIR wives are only with them out of obligation that’s how ALL relatoinships work, when no it’s not get a divorced please god. The Duckverse REALLY doesn’t need this According to Jim, My Wife and Kids, George Lopez, Home Improvement, Cleveland Show, King of Queens, Dinosaurs, Rick and Morty, Glen Martin DDS, etc all bullshit. People break up and Donald deserves better. And I genuinely blame both EP Matt Daner and Tony Anselmo for this. And I have a LOT of respect for both guys, i’ve made that very clear.. but Matt as EP and thus the one in charge fo the overall storyline is clearly the one who thought of this and Tony, who helped write for Donald this series, didn’t either get Tress, whose been doing daisy for two decades and is as knolwedgle for her as he is for donald the same courtsey or chime in given he should know daisy better. Both of these men should know better. Danner wrote for Xiaolin Showdown, that had great female characters for the most part and Tony is a grown ass man whose worked with women and is married as far as I know. Figure it out.  This Daisy thing has EASILY been the worst part of this retrospective as a whole, the worst part of this series and probably the worst thing i’ve seen in a duck property.. and again I saw daisy ACTUALLY HIT DONALD. 
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And this is worse. Because instead of one moment of terrible writing and misplaced slapstick that comes off as abuse, it’s just a constnat barage of emotoinal abuse treated as if i’ts DONALD’S fault. Donald did nothing wrong to her and his only crime is obessing of this hellspawned hardian. Fuck this entire plot with a garden rake lined with acid.
Also just a quick note before we speed through Daisy’s screentime to get to the good part of the episode, there’s, at least no yet NO proper reaction to Donald’s new life and it bothers me it bothers me a lot. She learns he has this whole secret life and has no fucking questions just more of the same old bullshit. “SIGH”
So yeah this b-plot: Donald wants to stay for Daisy
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And the others drag him along though this time.. Donald comes off as the asshole because he KNOWS they need him, knows he’s useful and knows this is more important but drags his feet anyway for someone who again, has done NOTHING good for him. And even with the girls saying the’ll help and telling him to keep the mirror handy, he still keeps complaning up until the plans reveaeld. 
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The plan, which.. May I think, the orange one. I know June is purple, but while May isn’t on board for this, the plan is to have April and June do the totoem pole trench and have donald be the face. So the entire plan is basically this
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They have an actually nice date till the ruse is revealed, and while he says “I can explain” which he can.. she PUNCHES the mirrror saying explain this. 
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So our heroes need to go to Mexico, Panchito’s homeland and somehow, in a series based on and starring primarily south american characters... one of the two times we visit the region and the only time we visit one of the cabs two home countries. Now the latter part i’m fair on since they were likely saving Brazil for the season 2 that never happened and didn’t want to blow their load just yet. The other part.. not so much. I’m not saying set the entire series there, there’s a lot of world, but most of the locations aside from the world tree are pretty common for globetrotting adventure: Easter Island, Stonehenge, Mt. Rushmore, The Pyramids, the Moon, and coming up Camelot and Shangri La. These aren’t BAD settings mind and are used creatively and probably will be in the two I haven’t seen, and the setups involving king arthur and a yeti spa do sound like they wont’ dispoint, but you had a real opportunity to teach kids, and my grown man self, about South America and ya blew it. 
But we’re in Mexico where after meeting a spooky cloaked guy who says they might not leave alive
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So our heroes enter the temple and the other side and find a bunch of chickens who see Panchito, who insisted on the trip due to his luchadores code of always helping the incident, as a god and their chosen champion for the goddess of light as the preistess explains. So we get a montage of Panchito getting pampred while the other cabs get pushed around, ending at a restraunt.  Xandra is naturally suspcious as the locals are being AWFUL vauge about what’s going on here, and this is getting pretty midsomar. Donald is distracted by daisy and Jose is distracted by a beautiful senorita, leaving Xandra to TRY and get panchito to think.. before being distracted herself by a mysterious handsome latino gentleman in black. Though during the dance with thier respective partners, Xandra and Jose both remark that it’s weird.. but are distracted by the sexy long enough for it to be revealed what Panchito’s duty is: as the champion of life.. he has to fight the champion of death. No Prize for guessing who. Though unlike with “Nazca Racing” where the teaser removed all tension since we knew it was a trap, here the teaser last episode helps, as we don’t see Team Feldrake till this moment, and we know something involving death itself.. and finding out panchtio’s representing life just ratchets up tension: we know the bad guys are involved.. but we don’t know how or what they’ll do. 
And the how is simple: A one on one wrasslin match! 
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Or lucha match since we Panchito’s a luchador and we’re in mexico. He’s wearing his usual outfit while Sheldgoose is wearing standard wrestling tights.. so a superstar babyface versus a heel comentator... but actually entertaining this time. As you can tell I love wrestling. While i’m more of a casual fan, I watch OSW and some other wrestling youtubes and don’t really watch the product at the moment, I do love and respect the sport and love a good wrestling episode or series of television as a result, so this hits the spot. 
So the match goes on and Panchito has the clear lead as Sheldgoose is playing by college wrestling rules and Panchito is playing by pro wrestling rules. And while you can use standard holds well you gotta mix the two together kurt angle style. Eventually Xandra decides to confront the sexy bird and sexy boy, and finds out, in a twist I didn’t see coming they ARE the god of life and god of death, respectively. While I knew this was a fight to the death, as death explains, a symbolic battle between the two with real stakes to keep ballance, I thought these two were just illusions brought up to keep Xandra and Jose from leaving or digging deeper. Instead they were just doing it on their own and as the god of death shows, they were genuinely intrested. I mean... why not get some while preparing to have your champions do battle. God for you death god, multitasking like that. Same for you goddess of life. Get it girl, you get after it. Jose is a fine man. I’d tap that if I could. Get after it.  So Xandra warns Panchito who finds taking life against his code and Jose again shows his awesomeness by pointing out the obvious: the match is timed, so if they run out the clock it’s a draw. Might lead to something but it’s better than nothing. So Panchito TRIES this, but Sheldgoose has leopold “Throw mommy to daddy” (One of my faviorite gags of the episode), and wacks him with feldrake before the whole thing becomes a brawl. And the god of Death does not take DQ’s or outside intefernce well and instead kills them all for breaking the rules. 
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Not kidding. The main cast is DEAD minus Xandra, as Death still wanted to bone her, but she refuses. So now Xandra is left while al lher friends are dead while the god and goddess head off in his caddy to go knock over mailboxes I guess. 
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Final Thoughts on Mexico-A-Go-Go:  Outside of .. certain parties, this was a REALLY fun one, with a great wrestling theme, a great mystery and the awesomeness that was the god of death, who was smooth, cool and thoroughly interesting and I wish there was a second season and his and xandra’s dynamic was really interesting. One of the series best, helped by the fact the Daisy bit while thoroughly irritating, was religated to a pretty funny subplot, with May being understandably skeptical of the plan, it somehow working and the sheer redicuonsess. It dosen’t make daisy tolerable, but it makes the episode better. 
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brideofcthulhu10 · 5 years ago
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More headcanons to help me work through the dreaded writer's block! Hope you guys don't mind it's a bit slow right now, I plan on posting another tonight and hopefully I'll be able to get to some asks once my brain is no longer fried
Dwayne Headcanons
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When he was responsible for Laddie, Dwayne would often take him out to the boardwalk whenever Star was busy. Sometimes he’d even choose to take him along even if they were with Star just to hang with the munchkin
If anyone told him he was too short Dwayne would hypnotize them into letting him one. He wasn't exactly worried about the kid being flung from the roller coaster, he could easily catch him if it happened. It felt awesome impressing him at the strength test, just watching him jump up and down as the attendant handed him a giant blue monkey which of course he'd give to Laddie. The boy was such a hyper, sunny child it was hard not to laugh when this spritely eight year old would play a water gun game and yell “this is a load of bullshit” when he lost. Well, he did grow up around four teenage guys, two having the worst language you could imagine. David used the word "fuck" like it was going out of style. At one point some lady in her thirties tried to lecture Laddie about watching his language, to which Dwayne had immediately stepped in after he said “piss off lady”. Again he had to choke back a laugh, pushing the kid behind him before this lady throttled him. To save face Dwayne feigned some half assed “shame on you” to Laddie just so she would piss off, and then ushered him away- for an ice cream sundae. Granted while he couldn’t condone a kid cussing up a storm, he did find it utterly hilarious watching this uppity chick squawk like a hen in outrage.
“Seriously though I don’t know where the hell you learned all that from-”
“Paul taught me.”
“Yeah, well, Paul probably isn’t the best guy to copy, kiddo. "
Chinese food isn’t his favorite, but he knows it’s Markos so he doesn’t complain when they have it at least once a week. Actually, his favorite is probably Hispanic. Many forget much of California was once Mexico, and as such the culture still thrived even into the early 1900s. Santa Carla flourished, and between pick pocketing gigs and heavy labor on the docks, Dwayne could always count on there being fresh tortillas for a few dollars after a long day. Elotes with extra chili powder, huarache, freshly brewed horchata on ice? Utterly delicious! Nothing can compare to freshly made tamales by a sweet abuela in a tiny food truck cooing to you in Spanish. Even he can blush when they pinch his cheeks gushing about what a skinny man he is. Paul and Marko love it as well and will often tag along when Dwayne goes to Mama Rosa’s, although he often has to elbow Paul in the gut because he’ll flirt with the cooks in the back into getting a free taco.
“Ay, Paul, mi angelito querido cielito, you’re skin and bones!”
“Well, I always skip a meal before coming here, abuela. Your cooking is too epic to have anything else in my stomach!”
“Dude, will you stop flirting with that poor woman before you give her a heart attack, you ass?”
Dwayne had a brother many years ago who was lost after being caught in direct sunlight during the great San Francisco earthquake of 1906. Since then on April 18th he holds a small memorial for his brother Jasper, who died pulling the curtains shut to shield them from the sun. Some years David, Paul and Marko will join him, silently drinking to their fallen friend. It's a rare moment of seriousness for these wild boys, sitting beside an altar crudely constructed atop a wooden crate, draped over with the jacket once worn by Jasper that survived the flames. Decorated in worn candles melted by decades of use, a bottle of rum from over eighty years ago still untouched with an empty shot glass beside it caked in dust and cobwebs, worn flowers shriveled into darkened husks, a glass of blood they keep freshly filled with each visit, feathers of birds to help carry him to the sky. Every time he adds something new, a gift from every era. Recently he brought Jasper a Def Leppard vinyl record, propped against a sketch of his brother drawn before his passing by an admirer who had died long ago. Paul left a little toy motorcycle for him, Marko brought an old pocket watch he found at an antique store that bore a striking resemblance to one he had admired long ago, and David brought him a hunting knife
“You would’ve loved hair bands, Jas. Everything’s changed now, its crazy. It sucks you never got a bike of your own,” Dwayne would say, sitting in the dark with only the tender flicker of candles brushing away the dark. Never again would he let the sun take him. It was the darkest, deepest cave in the hotel. And there, Dwayne spoke more than he ever does outside “Horses were cool, but it’s better to have something that doesn’t stop every time it takes a shit, you know?”
Unfortunately Dwayne sucks at video games. It’s not that he doesn’t get it, but he has the worst gamer rage. Now, Dwayne doesn’t often get legitimately mad, but when he’s been playing the same god damn stupid water level for the past hour and a half just to be killed by a squid-! Well, lets just say Paul practically dove to catch the controller before it was chucked at the tv, and cue a dirty look towards Dwayne for nearly smashing his “baby”. He wasn’t about to have him break ANOTHER controller. Yeah that wasn’t the first. At this point he’s content just watching from afar and sometimes back seat gaming when Marko is going the wrong way. He’s not nearly as bad as David who will openly call someone stupid after dying. 
Dwayne is definitely the type to nap after a long night. Truthfully he misses when he could just lay out in the sun like a lizard on a hot rock after a long day, it’d feel incredible. Instead he’s resorted to a hot water bottle or a heating pad. Yeah, he loves hot weather. Summertime is his favorite time, just savoring the toasted air blowing in his face on rides over the beaches. Sometimes he’ll try to wake up early to watch the sunset from within the cave, although it’s burnt him on more than one occasion he will still try to get a glimpse. Winter is the worst for him, he hates, absolutely despises the cold. Even though he doesn't technically get cold anymore, everything seems to die away in the winter leaving only twisted branches and grey skies. David may enjoy all that gloomy melancholy but not him.
One wouldn’t assume Dwayne to have much of a sweet tooth. That’s because they’re wrong. While he isn’t into the marshmallow caramel double candy bars deep fried and dipped in chocolate like Marko or Laddie, he has a serious weakness for chocolate. Like, a major weakness. Paul is still searching for his stash, tucked away somewhere secret in the hotel. Any time he thinks he’s close to finding it, Dwayne moves it again.
“Dude, sharing is fucking caring you greedy bastard”
“Get your own candy asshole, why do you think I keep my stash hidden from you guys?”
Now the whole hoity toity fancy chocolate isn’t what appeals to him. He can certainly appreciate a well made chunk of dark chocolate sprinkled with chili powder, but he’ll settle for a cheap bar snatched from a gas station. Most sweets weigh heavy on him, but chocolate is such a unique medium that can be changed into almost anything, appealing to every taste imaginable. Sweet, savory, spicy, bitter, semi-sweet, rich, dense, light. Chocolate cake, chocolate doughnut, hot chocolate, fudge, and of course the traditional candy bar. You make him a mug of Mexican hot chocolate and he is putty in your hands. You couldn’t necessarily bribe him with food. But you could certainly butter him up to suggestions when he’s crunching down on a candy bar. Paul knows this, and at this point Dwayne knows this guy has royally fucked up if he comes up to him with a stack of chocolate bars.
“Heeeeey, Dwayne, buddy, old pal, chum, lookie what I found, all for you man how cool is that?”
“....,” Dwayne glances up from his book at the handful of chocolate and slowly lowers it with a firm sigh. “What the hell did you do now?”
“Wha-Whaaa-? Oh! Okay, wow. Woooow. Offend much? I go out of my way- I mean, can’t a guy just, you know, do something nice for his best friend-?”
“Paul. What. did. you. do?”  
“Okay okay, well you see David made me go fill up his stupid bike, and there was this hot chick at the gas station, I mean perfect fuckin ten man, she had the biggest frickin tits- okay anyway! Well, next thing I know the keys are gone, the chick's gone, the fuckin bike- You gotta help me man he’s gonna fucking kill me and dance on my grave!”
Of course Dwayne will help… in exchange for twice the chocolate. Like I said, it won’t always work as a bribe, but it’ll certainly help your cause if you go in with some incentive.
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greencoded · 5 years ago
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        ———       ❛       HEY ,  MY  LITTLE  RAGER  TEENAGER ,                                                           I’VE  MISSED  YOU  AROUND .       ❜
(  triggers  :  illness ,  death  ,  abuse.  ) (  beast  boy  ( 2014 ),  edited  ©  )
       —    quick  stats  :
full  name  :  garfield  mark  logan nicknames  :  gar ( preferred ) age  :  twenty - two  (  22  ) gender  &  pronouns  :  cisgendered  man  /  he  &  him  birthday  :  november  sixteenth  (  11 / 16 / 1997  ) zodiac :  scorpio  romantic  /  sexual  orientation  :  biromantic  &  bisexual   fandom  :  dc comics  /  teen  titans  (  2003 - 2006  ) occupation  :  dog - walker  
(  SCROLL  TO  THE  BOTTOM  FOR  PLOTTING  IDEAS  !  )
        —     memory  (  not  his  last  canon  memory  ) :
    ❛       — -    sweet  sounds  of  childish  innocence  spilled  from  your  lips,  arms  out  stretched  as  your  ran  around  your  parents,  finger - tips  brushing  the  soft  greenery  that  surrounded  the  trio.  though,  it  hadn’t  lasted  long  as  you  heard  your  father  call  your  name,  grabbing  your  arm,  scolding  you  for  being  such  a  distraction.  with  an  apology,  you  plopped  down  on  the  ground,  your  beige  shorts  now  being  rolled  between  your  fingers.  nibbling  at  the  inside  of  your  cheek,  you  parted  your  chapped  lips,  almost  as  if  to  say  something.  the  simple  fear  of  getting  scolded  once  again  held  the  question  in  your  throat,  deflating  once  again.  maybe  it  was  better  to  just  keep  your  mouth  shut,  wait  until  you  all  went  home.
   ❛       — -     the  hours  passed  and  passed  as  the  sweat  ran  down  your  forehead,  silently  suffering  in  the  cot  provided  to  you  by  your  parents.  god,  your  parents.   don’t  wake  them,  you  thought,  don’t  bother  them.  light  flicked  on  as  a  blood - curdling  sob  ripped  from  your  throat,  the  pain  gathering  your  chest. . .  in  your  arms.  for  a  moment,  you  felt  like  you’d  been  cared  for  as  your  father  held  you  and  asked  about  what  you  were  feeling  ;  it  was  just  more  research  wasn’t  it  ?  you  were  officially  part  of  your  dad’s  testing . . .  a  part  of  his  project.
  ❛       — -     with  a  sharp  pain  to  your  abdomen ,  the  chilling  sweats  stopped ,  but  the  pain  had  just  begun  as  your  felt  your  bones  begin  to  ache .  your  blood  temperature  rising  beneath  sun - kissed  skin .  blinking  awake ,  you  watched  as  your  fingers  looked  a  sickly  green  color ,  watching  the  color  run  up  your  arm  as  if  your  arm  was  made  out  of  paper  and  a  child  had  run  through  it  with  a  marker .  it  took  the  child  only  a  second  to  sit  up,  dull  nails  itching  and  scratching  at  the  skin  on  his  arms  as  if  the  green  hue  he  could  simply  rip  off  with  enough  effort .  no ,  no ,  no  ! 
(  there  should  be  a  gif  here  but  i  hated  all  of  the  ones  i  made.  imagine  a  scared,  sad  green  boy  !  )
 ❛       — -     sharp  canine  teeth  brushed  against  your  soft  bottom  lip  ,  not  understanding  any  second  of  what  had  been  happening  to  you  .  you  didn’t  want  this  ,  you  wanted  to  go  back  and  run  around  in  the  grass .  you’d  rather  be  scolded  by  your  parents  instead  of  this .  whatever  this  was .  you  wanted  to  be  normal. . .  not  whatever  you  are  now .  this  monster. . .   this  BEAST.
      —    alternate  san  francisco  bay  area ,  titans  tower  :
     — -     garfield  logan  works  for  the  titans  group ,  a  group  of  heroes  that  help  protect  california , operating  out  of  san  francisco .  and  as  the  resident  comic  relief  in  the  group ,  seriousness  is  not  something  he  ever  liked .  while  he  grew  up  with  two  parents  who  focused  on  their  science ,  it  never  really  rubbed  of  on  garfield .  at  least ,  not  the  way  they  wanted  it  to .  obviously  fate  had  a very  different  plan  for  the  logan  family.
      — -     around  the  age  of  eight ,  garfield  had  contracted  a  very  serious  illness ,  sakutia ,  which  is  likely  to  cause  death  in  two  hours  to  everyone  and  everything  but  the  african  green  monkey .  while  it  would’ve  killed  him,  his  father  decided  to  inject  him  with  and  antivenom  to  make  sure  he  lived.  though,  as  a  result,  the  illness  rewrote  his  genetic  code,  therefor  giving  him  green  skin,  green  eyes  and  green  hair.  along  with  pointed,  elf - like  ears  and  a  pair  of  sharp  canine  teeth.  along  with  the  physical  changes,  he  was  able  to  morph  into  any  animal  in  the  animal  kingdom.  though,  he  favors  changing  into  household  pets  (  dogs,  cats,  lizards,  snakes  and  the  occasional  guinea  pig / hamster ) .
       — -     the  torment  of  his  father  and  mother’s  abuse  (  mostly  verbal ,  scolding  him  for  giving  himself  a  virus  he  never  intended  to  have ,  calling  him  an  embarrassment ,  etc. )  led  him  to  becoming  a  reclusive  person  until  joining  the  doom  patrol ,  though  ,  shortly  after  he’d  heard  about  his  parents  boating  accident  which  contributed  to  their  death .  soon  enough ,  he  left  the  doom  patrol  and  joined  the  teen  titans ,  changing  his  reclusive  personality  to  being  the  comedic  value  that  the  titans  needed .  using  jokes  and  comedy  to  cope  with  the  death  of  his  parents  and  the  abuse  dealt  to  him  at  a  young  age.  now  a  valued  member  of  the  titans ,  garfield  logan ,  (  aka  BEAST  BOY  )  now  felt  like  he  had  a  place  to  call  home .  you  can  read  more  about  him  HERE  &  HERE ,  since  i’m  mixing  both  canons  into  one .
     —    alucard,  pennsylvania ,  present  day  :
     — -     if  you  haven’t  heard  of  garfield  logan ,  then  you’ve  definitely  HEARD  garfield  logan .  with  a  voice  that  could  burst  eardrums  if  you  got  too  close .  as  the  only  child  and  son  of  a  biology  professor  and  an  animal  biologist  ,  he  was  was  always  seen  a  somewhat  of  a  disappointment  through  the  eyes  of  his  parents.  both  of  them  taking  turns  and  asking  if  he’d  decided  to  go  to  college  yet  ,  if  he  knew  what  he  wanted  to  do  with  his  life .  and  the  answer  was  always  no .  much  to  the  dismay  of  his  parents .  and  while  it  break  his  heart  to  have  parents  that  didn’t  support  you  choice  to  skip  school  altogether  ,  it  was  simple  to  hide  behind  the  veil  of  slacker  friends  who  enjoyed  your  jokes .  it  was  easier  to  fake  a  smile  than  it  was  to  give  everyone  a  real  frown .
      — -     garfield  lives  comfortably  on  his  own ,  barely  making  rent  for  his  very  run  down ,  one  bedroom ,  open  living ,  studio  apartment .  working  as  a  dog  walker  doesn’t  as  much  money  as  he  hoped .  but  he  knows  walking  the  dogs  of  the  more  wealthy  people  in  PA  would  get  him  the  money  and  tips  he  needed .  not  to  mention ,  he’s  a  sucker  for  animals . 
     — -     to  make  a  long  story  short ,  garfield  it  quite  literally  that  dumb  ,  skater  kid  you  see  telling  dumb  jokes  with  his  hat  on  backwards .  he’s  got  a  heart  of  gold  and  can  be  a  little  dumb  sometimes .  but  it’s  always  with  good  intent .  a  total  sweetheart ,  but  will  rip  you  to  shreds  if  you  mess  with  someone  he  loves.  is  a  giant  mess  and  totally  not  ashamed  of  it  at  all .  will  do  everything  in  his  power  to  make  you  smile  !  just  a  goofy  boy  with  the  best  intentions  and  is  here  to  provide  you  with  some  sunshine.
    —   plot  ideas  !  :
001.  you  know  what  gar  needs  ?  more  friends.  specifically,  a  PLATONIC  SOULMATE.  by  that,  i  mean,  someone  who  has  so  many  things  in  common,  they’re  practically  the  same  person.  would  be  sick  if  they  were  one  of  his  skater  friends,  but  definitely  not  necessary.  don’t  get  annoyed  with  him  and  love  and  support  the  decisions  he  makes... even  if  they’re  dumb. 
002.  gar  absolutely  loves  being  able  to  annoy  people  to  no  end.  he  adores  being  able  to  make  people  smile  and  loves  making  people  angry  a  little  more.  so,  someone  who  could  get  annoyed  with  his  very  happy,  silly  and  goofy  demeanor  would  be  amazing  !  he  will  constantly  tell  you  childish  jokes  about  poop  and  tell  you  to  spell  ICUP...  but,  i  promise  he  loves  you.  and  maybe  you  keep  him  around  because  you  secretly  love  it  and  he  makes  you  smile  !
003.  please,  i  need  someone  to  simply  despise  gar.  get  mad  at  him,  make  him  cry,  ask  him  how’s  he’s  so  happy  being  a  failure  and  not  doing  something  good  like  his  parents.  if  your  muse  is  kind  of an  asshole,  this  is  perfect.  i  just  know  not  everyone  is  going  to  like  him  and  i  thrive  on  enemy  plots  !
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pumpkin-stars · 5 years ago
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Sweet! So, here’s some more: Favourite reptile, best smell, biggest pet peeve, favourite animal, favourite board game, best subject in school, ideal vacation spot, coke or Pepsi, cheetos or chips, apple or orange juice, dogs or cats, favourite celebrity, if you could be in any show what would it be, if you could have one super power for a day what would it be?- 💣
Oh you weren’t kidding about bombardment 😂❤️
Ok so I love Komodo Dragons?? Like, when the Lizard Overlords eventually reveal themselves and take over, and they decide that I’m of no use to their post-human society, I’m totally down with my corpse being devowered by giant carnivorous lizards. Alternatively, I could look after those really small Sand Lizards (native to Europe) because I’ve looked after one before (his name was Barry) after he got trapped in a hole that was too small for him 😢
Best smell is old books. But also new books. Just,,, let me loose in a library (with no other people in there) and I’d be having a great time. Old books are great ❤️ unless they’re too old, and super dusty, because I WILL sneeze. I also like the smell of lavender because it helps me sleep.
Pet peeves,,, probably people who walk slowly (I have Walking Bitch Face and long legs, just get out the way) (I genuinely got stopped in the corridor at school once cause someone wanted to know if I was okay, and I was like “yeah fine that’s just my face”), or people who eat loudly?? Like, if I can hear you eating and you’re not sat next to me that’s an issue 🙃
Fave animals (can’t pick one) are spider monkeys, squirrel monkeys, red foxes, any kind of cat big or small, and sun bears! I also really want to own a goat 🐐
Fave board game is Cluedo (or Clue) because I fucking love murder mysteries and it’s super easy to cheat if you pay attention to every question asked 😂 (conversely, least fave: monopoly, Fuck Capitalism)
Best subject in school is history (I hope so anyway, I have a degree 😂) but I also enjoyed English literature and government & politics (those were my a levels!)
I really really really want to go to Denmark and Italy! (Catch my 602 day streak on Duolingo) also NYC and Boston and Chicago (I’ll just do a massive road trip or something)! Closer to home I’m all about rainy summers on the coast, or weekend trips to London!
Coke/Pepsi: I don’t like either! I’ll take Fanta or Tango any day (anything fizzy and orange is 👌🏻)
I’m not 100% sure on what a Cheeto is, but I’m pretty sure they’re like Wotzits and I haven’t had them since I was a kid 😂 salt and vinegar crisps are where it’s at tho
Apple juice the whole way!!! If I could only have one drink besides water it would be that 🍎
Cats! No doubt. (Various reasons but I’ve never seen a dog lick itself anywhere other than it’s arsehole but cats will wash everywhere and also not lick my face right after) 😺
Fave celebrity,,,,, I’m not sure I have one? Ask me 6 years ago I’d say Tom Hiddleston without hesitating but these days I don’t really have that weird teen-obsession with anyone? (I only call it that cause every teen I knew when I was a teen had one). This time last year my fave was Ramin Karimloo cause his voice is just 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻and I saw/met him in November which was incredible 😍 (he smells very nice)
If I could be in any show... as a “thrown into the universe” thing, probably something super mundane cause I’m a pussy and wouldn’t be able to handle the kind of criminal minds type situations. If I became an actor then probably doctor who, even if I was just Alien #3 and stood in the background not saying anything
If I had a superpower for the day I would freeze time and take a 24hr nap 😁
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wheremytwinwatches · 5 years ago
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[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 44
Last time: Doctor Marcoh broke the Hippocratic Oath, Envy chose the worst possible host, and a Central Officer showed Armstrong the Great his collection of action figures. Onwards!
Episode 44 - “Revving at Full Throttle” Oh heck yeah, we’re starting at the family reunion in Liore! Camera shows the radio fixed by the Elric Brothers way back when. [Beard]: “It’s been a long time, huh Al?” [Al]: “Yeah.” *awkwardness intensifies* [Beard]: “So, uh… I saw Pinako recently.” *Rose is standing off to the side, probably wondering about this ‘Pinako’ character her new boyfriend is talking about* [Beard]: “She told me about your body.” *awkwardness intensifies* *awkwardness intensifies* *awkwardness intensifies* [Villagers]: “Hey Mister Ho, could you-” [Beard]: “Oh sweet Leto yes get me out of this family drama. Absentee Anime Father, away!” Wow, really? Al are you just gonna let him walk away from this conversation? You haven’t seen him for a large portion, if not most of your life! Demand some friggin answers! Well at least the cook is trying to cheer Al up, thanking him for fixing up the radio. Al apologizes for the riot being caused by them exposing Cornello, but Cookie insists on looking at the good stuff that happened.
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Sure people reacted “badly” at first, but now everyone’s all happily working together to rebuild from the ashes of their home! Can’t fault the man’s optimism. Inspired!Al goes running off to help build, seeing their General getting his hands dirty Toad and Boar (still wearing their winter clothes?) tag along, dragging a protesting Yoki with them. The Villagers are realizing Oh Crap We Interrupted Family Reunion, but Beard’s brushing it off. He left when Al was super young, he probably doesn’t even think of Beard as his father anymore. And have you seen the guy try to smalltalk? He doesn’t know what to say- [Al, clanking towards the group]: “Hey pops! Imma help with the building, cool? Cool. Hey NPCs, gimme that heavy stuff to cart around.” Aw, Beard gets to see that Al being trapped in a cold, unfeeling suit of armor hasn’t kept him from being a decent person. Whoa okay bath time for Winry, apologies for interrupting. Winry’s happy to finally get a good bath after traveling for so long. Rose is chatting with her while laying out clothes, admiring Winry for being a independent Automail Engineer at her age. And she was the one who literally got Ed back on his feet, which would mean later he would help Rose get back on hers. *Goes back to Ep 3 Recap*. That’s right, he told her to Keep Moving Forward, that she needed to use her two good legs to make her own path. Rose tells Winry about her misplaced belief in Cornello, when Winry gripes about Ed’s Tough Love routine Rose says that’s just his way of being nice. [Rose]: “But you already know that, don’t you?” [Winry]: *Stammers, blushes, and tries to hide her face in her tea.* So yeah, Ed exposed the truth behind Cornello’s miracles, and now Liore is learning to stand on its own. “All thanks to Ed and Al.”... yeah, calling it now. We’ll come back to this place in a decade or two, and the old Church of Leto will have been replaced with one to The Armor and the Alchemist. Hey, it’s Lizard dude! Bido, according to Bag of Magic Food. He’s going through a tunnel, griping that it was a bad idea to follow those MPs aw crap he’s wandering into Uncle’s sanctum, isn’t he? Turn around dude! But he’s still looking for Mister Greed, squeezes through some pipes to crap it’s the Golem Room. And are the Officer and Armstrong the Great still there? Quick, pull an Igor!
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Ok, so it looks like he got there just before the Officer did his “Look at my cool toys” reveal, he’s hiding behind the pipes again. Officer’s explaining that the Golems are empty dummies that they can bond souls to. Oh, so they’re like Advanced Soul Armors, then? Tell me, have you gotten around the problem that Al’s having of the body rejecting the soul? Anyways, the Golems are immortal and apparently any bonded souls will be completely obedient. Alright Armstrong the Great, here’s the kicker; where do the souls to activate the Golems come from? Officer says that they’ll come from rival nations, “through the course of war”. Hoo boy. This was what I was afraid of way back when the concept of Philosopher Stones was introduced to Armstrong the Great. She is fiercely loyal to her troops and those she chooses to protect, it was the threat against her own forces and the reveal that the Goths were going to harvest the entire country that allied her with our main characters. But an army fueled by the conquest of Others? A chance to not just defeat her hated Drachman enemies, but fully convert them to her cause? Weapons that only grow stronger the more she uses them? I mean, with all the pushing around by Central and bullying of her troops I’m giving her 80% odds to still reject the Golems. But that remaining 20… We don’t get to hear any more as Bido freaks the fuck out and bolts back down the tunnels, screaming his head off. [Bido]: “This place is evil! Pure evil! Why did I ever come here?! Mister Greed would never be in an awful place like this-” Oh hey, it’s Ling! How’s Greed going to react to seeing an old “possession”: happy to see something of old that he gets to claim again, or annoyed that one of his old crew fled rather than try to help him? We’ll get back to that, we’re back in Liore where Al is warning Beard about the giant tunnel running under Liore. Beard tells him to stop talking about the Super Secret Goth Plot To Harvest A Country in the middle of the town square, waits until they’re in the ruins of the Church to discuss the story. He’s letting Al explain everything, does he want to keep his own involvement secret for- well never mind, Al’s brought up his Identical Brother chilling in Central. Beard turns away still acting all Mysterious wait what [Menacing!Beard]: “Did it ever cross your mind that I might be on their side?” But you’re not, unless… NOW HOLD UP. If you’re telling me that we’re looking at a Triplet situation, that Uncle made another copy to Oh ok I get it now. Beard is just emphasizing how trusting Al is, at least with him. But seriously dude, now that I’m thinking about it spilling your entire plan to a guy because you think he’s your father is a terrible idea. Maybe ask him to repeat a childhood memory, or somesuch? So after Al gets his non-corporeal heart to calm down from that scare, Beard says that he wants to tell his Backstory to both brothers in order to save time. Right, about that… Back up in the land of snow, at… “Bank’s Bank”? Really? That’s like a restaurant owned by Mister Burger or a law office run by Johnny Litigator. Whatever. Registers are ringing and checks are being cashed when huh. Sorry, just distracted by the banker’s appearance, she’s a lady with blonde hair but brown eyes and Ishvalan skin. What’s her story, is she an Amestrian/Ishvalan child like Sideburns? Moving on, a giant of a man is making a withdrawal oh hey it’s Monkey, he’s drawing from Ed’s account. Uh, are you that badly strapped for cash? You know that a withdrawal from the Protagonist’s account, by an unknown party no less, is going to raise all kinds of flags in Central. Yup, Monkey got the cash from Ed’s research account, but another banker’s already making a call. Ah, so it was for the medical bill. How much was this doctor charging? Oh jeez, the guy’s chuckling and saying he could charge them even more, Monkey complains that he’s already ripping them off but the doc’s likewise squinty-eyed wife says it’s only “reasonable” considering the risks involved.
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Well, as long as they keep their mouths shut well never mind, looks like the cops are already on to them. I don’t suppose they can get a refund? The cops show up and push past the doctor, Lion’s getting bandaged by Mrs. Doctor. Oh great way to sell out the resting patient, our guys had better get a refund if he’s going to cave this quickly. No wait it’s just Monkey scowling from under some covers wait is he trying to hide Ed under the sheets? The cop asks if Monkey was at the bank earlier, and pulls a gun… Outside a guard hears someone walking, another white coat? Doctor #2? Cop #1 is ordering for Monkey to put his hands up oh hey the white coat outside is Ed with some groceries! Outfit change? I suppose his red coat was pretty distinctive. While Monkey’s at gunpoint Lion readies his own pistol and Monkey starts drawing his own gun, things might get loud pretty soon. Wait, is Ed’s hair loose? What happened to the ponytail?
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Ok yeah, that was pretty distinctive like his coat. Outside guard is listing off the red coat, blond hair worn in a braid… uh oh. Here it comes. [Guard]: “... and short.” [Ed]: *bites through wooden skewer in annoyance* Nice knowing you, guard. The cops in the apartment hear a thud, and #1 tells another to check out the noise. Outside Guard is out cold, Cop #2 tries waking him up before there’s another thud, #1’s left yelling at the other two for answers when
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Wait hold on, is Ed grabbing this guy around the neck? Is he standing on a box or something? Unless… no. No! Is it finally happening? Is my little boy finally getting a growth spurt?! … Wait, but if he’s growing taller, but has an artificial leg whoops better find Winry quick to upgrade, fighting might be a bit difficult if you’re all lopsided. Monkey snarks that Ed just had to take out three MPs on his own, when he hasn’t fully recovered yet. [Ed]: “Don’t treat me like an invalid. My injuries are fully healed, and I’m revving at full throttle!” Title drop! And damn but Ed’s rocking the new look. White coat, loose hair, and a growth spurt? Leg imbalance aside, I am totally down for this. Wait, is this because he “used his own life force” to patch himself up earlier? His body aged up from the energy expenditure? Cool! Mid-ep pictures of Bath!Winry and Older!Ed. So is carrying a wooden skewer in your mouth just a thing now, Ed? The doc’s telling Ed and the Chimeras to shove off, doesn’t look like that refund’s coming after all. Ed snags the Guard’s note in passing, thinking about how they’re just looking for the red coat and braid (pointedly ignoring the “short” comment), guess the outfit change is staying around for a while. Whoops! Took too long, some other MPs have shown up and are demanding they freeze. Wait, “move it kid”? Oh yeah, they’re just telling the guys with visible weapons to stand down, they think that the kid chowing down on bread is a bystander. Who just got grabbed by Monkey and threatened with a weapon! Monkey uses the MPs shock at the hostage-taking to tuck Ed under his arm and run for it, outside some more MPs spot them but Lion shoots some snow down on them. Run for it! One hotwired car later, Ed tells ‘Gorilla’ (“Don’t call me that!”) to step on it, but their stolen car isn’t fast enough to outrun vehicles from Northern Command. Dodge a truck so the MPs crash into it? That they… can’t do, actually. The MPs are catching up when Ed says to turn a corner and park. Plan? Transmutation sounds as they round the corner, the MPs follow but… it’s gone? Wait there’s another car in the road, but… … Ow. Ow ow ow. OW! Sweet Leto, but that hurts the eyes. Really, Ed? I can only assume that the MPs brains have shut off from the sheer garishness of that thing, they drive past the parked car looking for something a little more sensible. The Chimeras immediately ask for the car to be turned back to normal. [Ed]: “And why’s that? I think this car looks cool as hell!” [Monkey]: “Just change it back. Please, we’re begging you!” [Ed]: “You guys got a problem with my sense of style?!” [Monkey/Lion]: “You don’t have any!” Outside of town, Monkey’s answering the call of nature while they all discuss being drifters again. Ed’s wait buddy you’ve got your hair back in a ponytail, it’s not a full-on braid but it’s still close enough that any guards are going to give you a second look. Go back to the loose hair disguise! Ed’s thinking about how he let his guard down around Kimblee, and hoping that Al’s ok. For now, the Chimeras are asking their new boss where to go, Ed says that they need to find Al who’s probably with Marcoh now. [Lion]: “You do know how to find them, right?” [Ed]: “Right, about that…” In Liore, Al’s trying to wrap his head around Beard’s Backstory. Beard understands if Al doesn’t believe him, it’s a pretty crazy story. Then we remember that Beard’s talking to a soul bound to a suit of armor, so the idea that Beard is a Philosopher’s Stone isn’t that far fetched. They chat about being immortal, and thankfully Beard acknowledges the advantages of his form before settling on the fact that seeing everyone he knows and loves wither and perish sucks. Hey yeah, if you have a Philosopher's Stone body, did that affect Ed and Al’s development? Apparently not, Beard says he still has a human body. Unlike Uncle, who’s likened to “a leather bag”. He built a human body around himself and his gathered souls, so if they can destroy the body… Speaking of, the Nationwide TC! Beard looks over the TC and reverse-TC while Al says they can destroy the tunnel below Liore, but Beard shuts down the idea. Pride’s watching over the tunnel. But can they still try before nope we know the tunnel’s finished, and Beard is rather relaxed about the idea it’s complete. “Because it’s not yet time”? How do you know? [Beard]: “Look up, son. You’re too busy looking down when you need to look up.” Oh! I get it, it’s a constellation thing! That explains why the Xerxes King was talking about carving all the Crests before it was too late, the Nationwide TC needs the right positioning of the stars. Can’t do it until then.
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Yes please follow along Al, look up to the sky, to… LETO! Bwahaha, Al thinks that Beard’s talking about Sun-God Leto. There we go, turns out Beard has converted to Letoism and plans on praying the Goths away. Or the Man in Central could indeed be waiting for the right star positions, that works too I guess. Oh hey, back to Bido in the pipes. Running? Oh shoot, looks like it was “Annoyed his possession abandoned him” Greed after all. Greed laughs about the chance to kill his boredom, Bido’s shocked to see the Ultimate Shield and hear the voice, yells at Greed for imitating Mister Greed. Wait, does Greed not recognize Bido? Greed boasts about wanting everything, Bido finishes his spiel about demanding the finer things in life. Greed asks who Bido is wait static? Ok, so Greed really doesn’t remember his past iteration? He lost his memories when Uncle reconsumed him? Bido’s struggling to reconcile the Mister Greed he knew with this new guy, while Greed demands Bido answer his questions. [Bido]: “It’s me! I’m your friend, Bido! You haven’t been gone from Dublith long enough to forget!” [Greed]: “Oh, you’re from Dublith! Ooohoho, now it makes sense!” [Bido]: “You remember m SHIT Greed just stabbed Bido! [Greed]: “Afraid not. You must have been buddies with the previous Greed.” Well this sucks, Bido’s trembling in pain and grief while Greed says they’ve never even met wait the static’s back and his arm is trembling and the static is becoming visions of Greed’s old crew. Is his memory returning? Hoo boy Ling’s calling Greed out for killing his old friend. Greed protests that Bido wasn’t his friend, that those memories belonged to the previous Greed. [Ling]: “Then why are you in so much pain?!” Ling’s threatening that if Greed doesn’t pull himself together that he’ll take control of the body again. Greeds gritting out that his old memories were purged by Uncle, that they aren’t part of him anymore- [Ling]: “No, you’re wrong Greed! It’s not that easy! They’ll always be a part of you! You can’t just erase them from your soul! They were the only part of you that you chose! Look at them! Can you not hear their souls crying out? You abandoned them, your real family! You threw them away like trash! Fool, you turned your back on something you wanted. You don’t deserve to call yourself Greed!” Clutching the still form of Bido, Greed screams. End Credits. Post-credit scene in Central at the Bradley Manor, Mama Bradley is suggesting a book to Selim. About an adventurer who travels the world- Bradley’s looked up and Mama Bradley grabbed Selim at the sound of rustling and footsteps. It’s Greed. And he’s not happy.
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animalids · 5 years ago
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Do you have a favorite animal? Or a few absolute favorites?
Oh boy, get ready, this is gonna be long! Thanks for giving me a reason to just list my favorites! Also, just assume any domestic breed/species is on the list, I love them all, I’ve just highlighted a few that I love a bit more than the rest
Arthropods:
Solifuges - I love all solifuges, but if I had to pick a favorite species it would probably be Metasolpuga picta. They’re big and colorful and day-active. Also really fond of Rhagodidae because they’re just so distinctive!
Tarantulas - Same deal, I love them all (though Poecilotheria scares me a little ;n;). Some of my favorites are Hapalopus and Ceratogyrus, both of which I personally own right now.
Huntsman spiders - My dream pet is Heteropoda lunula and it will probably be the death of me haha
Ticks - If I see people hating an entire species for just living, I immediately fall in love with that species and will defend it till I die. Hate the tick’s bite, don’t hate the tick itself - it’s just an animal surviving the only way it knows how to.
Mosquitoes - Same deal. They’re also exceptionally beautiful.
Serolid isopods - Just... just look them up. Trust me, they won’t disappoint.
Tachinid flies - Especially the spiky ‘hedgehog’ flies and especially Tachina grossa whose Danish name is ‘Harald the Giant Fly’ after zoologist Harald Thamdrup whose student was studying them.
Mammals:
Horses - I’ve never seen a horse I didn’t love. Some of my favorite breeds are Welsh Mountain Ponies, Jutland Horses, Frederiksborgers, Kladrubers,  
Painted wolf - They’re just so photogenic and charismatic
Cats - Have you ever seen a cat? They’re so full of love
Bactrian camels - All camels are great but domestic Bactrians are just so cute and fluffy. They’re honestly my dream pet, and I’m already reading up on their husbandry all the time.
Bovines - All of them. Bison, cattle, gaur, buffalo, yak... Also non-bovines that look like bovines, such as muskoxen and wildebeest.
Moose - They’re so beautiful and look like something straight out of the ice age.
Pigs - They’re so beautiful! Domestic pigs and wild pigs alike. Especially babirusas.
Honestly just artiodactyls in general - Off the top of my pinterest head, these are some of my faves: Takin, serows, tahr, bharal, domestic goats and sheep, okapis, saolas, reindeer, roe deer, marsh deer, Père David’s deer, saiga, lechwe, nilgai, eland, oryx
Baboons - They scare me but I also think they’re beautiful. I can see why early travellers described them as a mix of monkey and dog.
Cuscus - yeah, they look like that
Tree shrew - Grandpa
Birds:
Pheasants - Especially ring-necks. They were everywhere around my childhood home and just make me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
Turkeys - They’re just beautiful
Peacocks - Chaos incarnate
Chickens - They’re so diverse and good pets! Can you tell by now I love galliform birds?
Pigeons - All of them, but especially feral pigeons and collared doves.
Reptiles:
Slow worms - I have very fond memories of catching these deceptively fast lizards as a kid :’)
Corn snakes - Yet another one of my dream pets. Those morphs!! And they have such a sweet temperament
Phrynocephalus mystaceus - It’s just a really cool agama
Xenodermus javanicus - It’s just a really cool snake
Dwarf caimans - they are baby
Amphibians:
Caecilians - I’m honestly not that interested in amphibians, but caecilians are the exception. They’re so weird, their taxonomy is messy, they look like earthworms but have a skeleton, and their life cycle is a mystery!
Fish:
Sunfish - I don’t like the post that was going around a year or two back about how sunfish have survived by being useless - they’re amazing animals and surprisingly intelligent
Koi fish - Pretty, intelligent, lots of colors, domestic. What’s not to love?
Danish golden trout (guldørred) - A cross between two trout subspecies that was first developed in Denmark. Obligated to mention it because it’s the only fish breed my country has created :’)
Eels - All of them. I’ve never seen an eel I didn’t like.
Non-arthropod invertebrates:
Worms - Annelids are so fascinating! Earthworms, marine worms, parasites, free-living species... they’re so diverse! I have no idea how worm scientists tell species apart. Nematodes (which are actually ecdysozoans, not annelids) are especially mysterious to me. Scale worms are really cool.
Snails and slugs - They’re so cute with their little eye stalks and cute defenseless bodies. I want to protect them all. I have a bunch of Achatina fulica and I love them.
Clams - The most overlooked molluscs and least respected animals we use.
Tardigrades - They look like the love child of a bear and a velvet worm, with a vacuum cleaner for a face.
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renaer-is-allegedly-hot · 5 years ago
Text
session 11 notes (i’ll fix them one day but i’m agro this was tea hate this)
Two minute one shot while dom pees
Adam has a floaty tube
Asyna can't turn into a hippo
Giant seahorse
Jane austen
Elizabethh and darcy my hands are shaking
Dom has 4e books
Dom was pretty out of it last session
It's afternoon
Dom is toasty
In jacob's other campaign a goat bit off his penis so the goat's name is richard byter
"at first the goat was reluctant"
"what a goat"
Last week on dragon heist
We were meandering through the city
"one of you met with an old friend, briefly"
Zoo time
Aerana knows where the zoo is in the sea ward
Raised brick gate w high walls; on top are intricate metal railing spiked stuff
Entrance is v wide, not too many people going in bc it's raining a lot
Maybe
Apparently the weather is super important and I still don't know why the weather is so important
It is currently raining
Pouring
Ticket booth in the front
Gold piece per person
Botanic repository
We walk up to the booth covering ourselves w the hoods we have
Velvet rope line but we just navigate through it like in shrek
Adam goes first
Walks in and see smiling figure, human male middle-aged, heavyset, festive outfit, "thank you for visiting - oH how's it going?!" it's volo
He's doing research for his newest obok
Hi jacob's dad
Jacob's gonna go fishing
Volo under impression he would be one of zoological experts but no
"recommendations?"
They brought monsters in from the isle of chault
Points us off to the exhibit to go
Originally zoo was not a zoo as we think of but like throwing them in a pit and being like look at them think httyd
Now it's closer to what we'd consider a modern day zoo
Lots of foliage
It's a big zoo
Like the San diego zoo
Or disneyland
Dom talks abt his brother's haircut
We can run through it
Can asyna just sprint
Aerana and asyna r gonna run
Adam cel and theo r gonna not run
Most of the zoo taken up by exhibits devoted to the island
Looking in the entryway a lot of ppl r carrying pamphlets n papers and speaking in foreign tongues like tourists or smth ig
Adam casts disguise self to make him look as fancy as everyone else
Has feathered cloak
Three major pathways
Chault exhibits for weird stuff r left
Marine stuff and some chault r forward
To the right r monsters from the interior continent
Adam cel and theo (?) go to the right
Most ppl r in pairs
A lot of biologist-type ppl; ppl who look like they're used to handling animals
First real exhibit on the right is a human woman inside the exhibit throwing down pieces of meat to lions
Is asyna a moon druid ? Yes
How did the human woman get there ? But she doesn’t notice
"does this zoo have dippin dots" - lillian 2020
Perception check, 15
There r ppl selling stuff, sees dejected gnome sitting under a pedal cart w a dingy umbrella and he's grumpy n angry
Adam walks over to him
Selling diff snacks n refreshments
He's mostly selling a fizzle pop
Strawberry flavor, blueberry, butterfly flavor
"are ur fizzle pops made w organic butterflies ? Bc I'm kinda on a diet rn"
Adam says it's disgusting
"I'll have a blueberry thank you"
Cel is gonna try the butterfly one
It's sweet; doesn't taste like blood but does taste almost nutty
So like what I would think pistachio tastes like
Fun size popsicle
Theo gets strawberry
They go to the next exhibit
A really vertical exhibit
 Oneshot
Cel is gonna try and ride seahorse asyna but rolls a nat 1 for acrobatics and then a nat 1 for dex save
Smashes head on rim of the pool, bleeding out and unconscious
Healing words from adam
Climbs out of the pool
The water is now red
Three children on the other side of the pool
One of them gets really excited and pees when adam tells them that there's a chemical that turns pool water red
Asyna left the pool when the kid peed
Asyna leads everyone over to the hospital
Adam is gonna try and healing words fix cel
Cel is back to full health
One of the kids is crying scared when she finds out the water is blood
Theo is gonna go get the kids ?
Ok back to the zoo
There's a hippo exhibit
We go check it out
On the way there run into different typical zoo stuff
Apes
Monkeys
The younger ppl r around these exhibits
A lot of closed sections bc of weather like "don't worry next winter this animal will be back"
Alligators
Ringtails that r lemurs ringtail lemurs
Birds
Carefully curated trees that r uber high
Hawks and giant eagles
Oops my phone froze
Tap on the glass to say hi to the what now
Theo wants it to come say hi to her
Animal handling check, 10
Can't attract their attention but
The hippos
Asyna has speak with animals LMAO
Basically can't talk to worms
No more tapeworm talk :/
"Theo says hi . This is theo"
"everybody gangsta until they find out jacob thinks barney is a hippo" - dom 2020
Colombian drug lord one time built private zoos and the hippos broke out but now there's a hippo problem in colombia
Pablo escovar
Speak with animals is ten minutes
We're also probably fighting later
We're gonna talk to the hippos
Theo waves
One of them paddles over and tries to sniff
"hm . Can you eat it ?"
"pleaes don't"
 I just remembered seaweed is not a plant it's an algae
This hippo does not have a name
Calls sister sister
"ask about juicy hippo gossip" - adam
"no but if I did I would share it"
Originally zoo was place for research
Anything else to ask hippos before we check out rare animals ?
The hippo floats away and we say bye
To the chault exhibits
Getting late but there r a lot more researchers
First exhibit has a lot of strange, unfamiliar trees
Monkeys w really big fluffy sideburns clustering around overhanging branches bc it's raining
Some of them r taking leaves and using them to keep the rain off
One of the monkeys hops off the branch
The sideburns actually extend into wings and it goes to another branch
"it's like the wizard of oz"
"adam what's the wizard of oz"
Flying monkeys
Adam walks over to a researcher and asks the most must-see
Woman who is probably from chault bc wearing strange woven beret w branches n stuff
Alien to anything they've seen
"I would point you in the direction of the behemoths"
"what are behemoths"
Adam rolls nature check
9, he doesn't know what a behemoth is
She is from chault
Behemoths r considered friends there
Asyna and aerana know where chault is
Everyone else just knows chault is v far away, almost like a nightmare story told to children
Described as a hellscape
"I'd sooner go to chault than-"
Asyna and aerana know chault is a massive island to the sw of the sword coast, home to v tropical, intensely humid climate w lots of rain + some invasions in the past but now things r opening up
We're gonna check out the behemoths
From a distance, this exhibit much larger than others, much more heavily excavated
Not so much walls as railing looking into a deep cavern
All manner of plant life brought in to accommodate the creatures
Huge lizard of some kind
Huge size category
Irl a horse is large
Humans and dwarves are medium
Exhibit says it's a macetail behemoth
Ground trembles w each step of the behemoth
Slow, ponderous
Gigantic armored lizard w tough plating on its back and spikes on the sides of its head w bony, protective coverings all over it
Massive swinging tail protruding bone swinging back and forth as it walks
Looks like that one dinosaur
We would call it an ankylosaurus
Things that go over my head : see description bullet points before this
Tail end of speak with animals
Asyna can turn into dinosaurs
"you look really cool do you have a name"
One of them looks up but doesn't really respond
Doesn't answer
Look for velociraptors
Gonna look at all the exhibits
Spirehorn behemoths
Faces almost look like shields
Triceratops
Alien to us tho
I can't believe that like as dom's explaining these everyone else can like ,, imagine it
Like that's crazy they see pictures inside their heads
Feathered behemoths
Occasionally jump around
Claws and walk around on two legs
Bloodspike behemoth
Stegosaurus, baby and two parents
Asyna can turn into a deinonychus
We have enough time for one more exhibit
We see a creature alone in its pen save for two researchers dropping treats in front of it, other has a pickaxe and is tapping the ground and scooping smth up trailing the creature and brushing it into a bin
Creature reflects rainbow of colors ? I think
Huge snail, has three eyestalks but they kind of droop down and have heavy spikes off each individual one
Cel reads description
Flail snail?
It's a big boi
Described not as a beast but as something that comes from a realm of earth
As it moves it excretes glass
Generally docile but if prodded r really dangerous bc the things it has r more weapons than eyes
Adam asks if it's a petting exhibit
The flail snail is just as slow as a regular snail
"that is the most disgusting magic resistance I've ever seen in my entire life" - jacob 2020
Everything starting to shut down
We realize we should probs skedaddle
Time to find loser boy
Rain has not stopped but has kinda calmed down
Heading straight to the wig shop
Lamps in the trades ward r lit
Brighter than what we've seen recently
Adam peers into the shop
Perception check
6, tries to get water off the window, looks empty
Theo's gonna pick the lock
25, it's a simple lock and theo gets it open easily
Shop is empty
Somewhat eerie for those without darkvision bc the mannequins
Cel will go and investigate the back room, door is locked
Theo tries opening again
23, opens easily
Immediately smells weird powder
A lot of the perfumes for preserving dyes n stuff kept back here
Cel makes a perception check
16
V organized, neat and tidy
Manhole cover in the back
Sewer system v advanced in waterdeep but also means there's a lot of it
A lot of ppl will build over sewer openings bc cheaper real estate
"sewer access authorized city officials only"
Adam rolls nat20 for boxes
Looking for anything necromancy related, licking things, doing all manners of investigation
Feels a small leather sack, pulls it out, kinda heavy
Opens it up, sees coins that are kind of heavier and thicker; not silver, 5 platinum pieces
Platinum is 10 gp each
Could take the platinums
Scry the money and sack
There are cupboards at the front desk
Necromancy considered suspicious, looked down upon
"ah . It's like watching anime ." - jacob 2020
"no, it's not like watching anime" - dom 2020
The art itself is not a crime but the things that occur in tandem w it r usually crimes
Discussing what to do in character
Cel insight check, 16
Earlier dom mentioned we're aware many ppl in waterdeep use the sewers to traverse unseen in the city; kinda suss the building was built on top of a sewer
Adam is borrowing aerana's warhammer
Adam hits the floor, leaves big dent and a v loud sound
Cel makes strength check w advantage w crowbar
Rolls a 12, can't get it open
Can sort of shift it up
Adam smashes a jar over the floor
Dex check, 5
Cloud of neon yellow sprays out like a cloud of dust and smoke, just the color
Covered in bright yellow dye
Theo tries lockpicking
23, lock is more difficult and takes a little longer, but eventually it opens
Once it's opened, the chains undo themselves and snake out on their own accord
It's just a dark hole
Can see a short drop that leads to a staircase
Adam holds lantern
Cel's just gonna go w adam at the front, pitch dark
Darkvision lets us see to some extent; everything is in grayscale
Lantern beam does help us see a little
Asyna closer to front as well
Leads to a room, 10' x 20'
Descending down short flight of stairs, room totally bare save for a barred door that u can see out of, also locked
Hear faintly some water
Theo rolls 23 for lockpicking
Door opens
Adam investigating room for secret door, tunnel, anything
Investigation check, 10 and 5 for investigation checks
Look around but room is barren
Nothing stashed anywhere, nothing to indicate a secret door or anything
Adam and cel step out, to immediate right extends for 10ish feet before merging into wall
Directly in front is water and like a sewer river flowing to the right
"are there any rats" "make a perception check" "nat 1"
To left, passage curves so hard to see but for at least 40 or so feet the pathway continues
Adam rolls another 5 for investigation check
We eventually get to a small stone bridge
I FORGOT I RESEARCHED THE SEWER SYSTEMS idk if I should bring it up I brought it up
A 15 intelligence check
Waterdeep's sewers are a subject of fascination for the city
You know the passageway like the one ur in often has arteries or iron doors set in them leading to different areas
Also know sometimes due to poor planning or smth some areas without walkways also have access tunnels
There's a bridge ? Nasty water under it
Over the bridge we go
Cel rolls a 22, plenty of damp areas around ,, no light in the passage, walking for a minute or so and w each step just hear a wet squelching noise; we're leaving behind wet, muddy footprints
No sign of recent mud in front of us
10 minutes go by and every once in a while pass side arteries w more sewage flowing in
This part seems relatively well planned
Can only go straight ? No other curvature in the path
Traveling south
"I'm gonna try and get that rat" - adam 2020
Adam picks up the rat for sleight of hand check
22
"you're able to grab up that rat pretty good" - dom 2020
Adam holds rat out to asyna and tells her to do her thing
"hey buddy"
"uh you have to cast your spell first"
"hey pal how's it going"
"let me go"
"uh we'll let you go if you answer some of our questions"
"don't even"
"no he's saying don't eat him"
"my friend here holding you is gonna take a big chomp of you if you don't answer our questions"
"have you seen anyone"
"don't know"
"I open my mouth"
"I kind of want to squeak" - marguerite 2020
Rat points north
Adam wants a piece of string to tie onto the rat like a leash
Adam is starting to feel short of breath after 10 minutes of walking
"that's either from the powder . Or the key"
Adam doesn't feel indigestion right now just that it's difficult to get air
Adam tries to tie a leash to the rat
Dex check
Nat1
Rat runs away
We go back the way we came, another 10 minutes, we pass three of those stone bridges
Cel investigation checks the dead end again, adam will give bardic inspiration
"Open sesame" - song
18, nothing there
It's a maze, we'll try naya
Adam takes out sack of platinum
Naya appears, looks around and shudders and bounds away
Following the deer
Naya is guiding back to where we originally where
Moving south again
Looks at passage back again passage then vanishes
Naya was standing on one of the bridges
First artery
It's a passage
We gotta wade through the sewer
Aerana readies weapon
Wading through, halflings get disgusting smth in their boots
Passage goes 20 ft before turning on a diagonal, turn onto passageway then it extends v far into distance
"adam's adding to the sewage right now probably" - jacob 2020
Adam's feeling lightheaded
Cel makes medicine check on adam
Rolls a 6, don't know what's wrong bud
Adam rolls around in the sewer water to get the powder off ??
I guess he is
Adam makes a constitution save, a 3
OH? OH NO
The yellow stuff is off but adam is smeared in shit
Did I make a good or bad decision
We keep going but adam feels better like fine like nothing's wrong
Oh no adam's gonna die it's like hypothermia where u feel super hot at first then u die
Passageway stretches on for awhile until coming across a rusty ironed door raised so that we'd have to step up to access it
Aerana makes perception check on the door, 20 not a nat
Hears people shouting and what appears to be a cat
Can't tell if the shouting is bad or not
Theo wrings out cape
Go up to the door, realize there's no lock; the entire lock has fallen out bc the door is so rusty
Adam checks door for traps, 12 investigation
Does not appear to be trapped, looks p old
Adam is in middle, cel towards back, aerana at front
About 25' ahead is a wider chamber and a door set into the wall, the areas are lit
We already walked through the rusty door
Massive screeching sound that came from the door when u opened it
Gotta b stealthy
Door to the right is unlocked
Adam opens the door open, looks like a storage room w different crates and sacks; bland
Some water barrels, adam pours it on himself; the rest of us also do it
Moving into room adjacent to passageway; triangle things in the wall has arrow stuff to make it easier to fire from but the room looks abandoned
Deeper in we go
Don't go that far but hit a wider room extending out 40'
Center of the room; at one point looks like there was a wall covering the room but has since collapsed; several ppl looking at us
Far corner opposite to us is an old halfling man in dark robes, clutching wound at chest, long gray braid down back staring at us as if he heard we were coming
In front of him are two smiling skeletons
It's the necromancer
The skeletons r also looking at us
They appear to be guarding him
In front of skeletons are three kenku looking at us
Bingbong is not one of the kenku
"I can explain" - adam
"we came down here and I was covered in shit and" adam casts pyrotechnics centered in between skeletons and kenku
Initiative
Aerana, 19
Cel, 17
Asyna, 15
Adam, 15
Theo, 9
Aerana
Holds attack, if kenku move within 5 ft of her she'll attack
Cel
Skeletons have bows and shortswords
Kenkus have shortswords
Will hold an action if attacked
Skeletons
Appear to b human skeletons, medium size
Lash out at kenku
One kenku able to parry away an attack, other skeleton slashes another kenku
Asyna
Attacks kenku closest to her, the one not hit
15, "what are you attacking with" "iiiiiiiii don't knowwwwwwwwwww"
Asyna turns into ape
Runs up to terrified kenku
Swings both times but it gets out of the way and hisses like a cat
Adam
Casts pyrotechnics on kenku
One passes, one fails
Failed one is blinded for next turn
Cutting words on the kenku by asyna
Kenku
Blind
Tries to escape, skeleton misses and kenku staggers away and starts feeling way along wall and runs into room west of where we are
Other one
Makes attack on skeleton, half of ribcage slashed but it's still standing
Other other one
Tries to attack ape, misses
Halfling
Stands up, tries to flee
Theo
Hits kenku that tried to get asyna, 5 damage
Has sneak attack, deals 12 damage
Arrow shot into neck, still alive but not for long
Aerana
13 damage to other kenku
"how do you want to do this"
Kenku drops dead
Skeleton turns smiling to aerana
Cel
15 to hit, 6 damage, dead
"how do you want to do this"
Pulls arrow back as far as she can "and I don't know if it's bingbong, but I'm gonna pretend it's bingbong and shoot it right through his eye socket"
"I want to keep bingbong as a pet" - jacob 2020
"kenku are sentient beings, that would be slavery" - dom 2020
Looking around we see the bodies of three other kenku and remains of two other skeletons
The skeletons attack aerana
One hits, 3 damage
Asyna
Goes into the room to follow the halfling and the kenku
Some kind of exit around
The blinded kenku is in here
Can reach halfling or kenku
Marguerite wants to hug the halfling
Athletics check to do it
21
Old man screams but asyna can hold him, unable to escape
Kenku still feeling around on the floor
Adam
Follows asyna
Gonna cast sleep
Kenku falls asleep
Yells over at the halfling
"can you call off your skeletons please"
Halfling
Loser boy's turn
I don't remember how to spell losser unless it's losser
Tries to escape asyna's grasp
"he does not escape your grasp"
Asyna rolls another athletics check
17, he does not escape
Theo
14 to hit, 16 damage
"how do you want to do this"
Arrow to the skull just goes really far in and the skull falls off as do misc bones
Aerana
Misses hit
Tries to thrust forward w sword but it drops and contracts, sword slipping through ribcage
Cel
19 to hit
8 damage, hits shoulder and arm falls off
Skeleton
Misses
Asyna
Waddles the halfling over to adam
Gives him a little squeeze
Adam
baned halfling
And cutting words
No cutting words nvm
Halfling
Asyna rolls a 25
Can't squirm out
"unhand me there are more of them there are more kenku"
Theo
"ok. Bye bye skeleton boy"
22 to hit
12 damage
"how do you want to do this"
Hits him in the smile; teeth knocked out and all of it collapses like a xylophone type noise as the bones hit the floor
Out of combat
Aerana ties up sleeping kenku
Adam casts charm person
Cel is gonna loot
Investigation check, 7
10 gold combined on the kenku; takes
Halfling is charmed to consider adam a dear old friend
Says he just finished work on his new purse; his fanny pack (basically)
Not sure we recognize the material
Adam says he knows who sent the kenku
"you have the stone"
"they stole it from me"
Says he randomly found a nice stone from a rat
Adam puts his hand on loser boy's shoulder and asks if he wants to work from home
Trying to convince loser boy to come with us
Declines
The purse is made out of elf skin
Bc it's supple
Adam trying to get a magical weapon out of loser boy
Has a potion that protects from necromancers
Persuasion check, 24
Goes into side closet
Damage resist potion
Aerana kills him
Wow are you ?? Desensitized ?? Are you desensitized or does it help not being able to see anything ever
Adam rummages through loser boy's desk
Investigation check, 15
False bottom to one of the desk drawers w 100 gold inside
Cel investigation checks loser boy, 13
Finds a little wand w a skull tip
Adam is gonna look at the purse
This bag is a faint gold
Adam shakes the kenku awake, wisdom 13 saving throw
Fails
Charm person
Making dog noises
"you want to take us to your friends"
"I don't know where they are"
"then let's just go back to your base"
"get back to base ? No one knows where that is"
Adam introduces himself, mentions bingbong
Gets theo and cel's names, mimics sound of a hammer hitting metal when asked his name
His name is bonk now
Asks asyna's name, asyna is still an ape
Big hairy git
Aerana says she'll trade information for her name
Adam swings warhammer into ground to threaten kinda
Adam makes 12 insight check
We don't recognize any of the voices he uses
Asks if we live in a hole
Asks if the house is nice
Copies adam's voice for the house boom
Adam asks if he knows about the puppet
"couldn't tell you if I knew"
Nat20 adam runs insight check across entire conversation
He's lying abt not knowing where his friends are
I DFJGSLGJS THAT'S WHAT I WAS SAYING ABT US STILL GIVING UP INFORMATION ASFKJAFD
Adam asks him why he was lying
Hear a voice we've never heard before
But this one in particular is bizarre and warped as if it's through some filter
"do you know what happens when you lie to me"
Adam
Anyone w passive perception over 9 hears a bottle break and a door slam in one of the rooms to the south
Cel hits his brain basically
Some of you starting to piece together that smth strange is happening
Pattering of footsteps from room to the south
Session over for the night
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dingydiamond · 4 years ago
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I See Deer People: Netflix’s Human-Animal Hybrid Adventure Series “Sweet Tooth” Soars In Official Trailer
I See Deer People: Netflix’s Human-Animal Hybrid Adventure Series “Sweet Tooth” Soars In Official Trailer
Sweet Tooth! Source: Netflix So far this year we’ve watched a giant monkey slap-box a giant lizard, Greek Gods battle evil aliens from space and gang-affiliated ninjas who control fire and ice in enjoyably ridiculous movies/shows that set the tone for dystopian human-animal hybrid adventure series “Sweet Tooth” coming to Netflix next month. Executive produced by Robert Downey Jr. and his wife…
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