#not to mention...

[starmieknight]

AFTERMATH: A Tale of Two Stans (17 Again AU)

Page One, Page Two, Page 3

Text under cut ⏬️⏬️

Panel One:

Ford: (CHOKING) *thinking* Can't breathe! So strong... I wonder if she's a Corduroy?

Wendy: (YANK!) C'mon, man - I don't have all day. Soos, put some ice on Stan's face.

Panel Two:

Soos: You got it, dude!

Stanley: Soos, put me down or I'll cut your pay!

Dipper: C'mon, man - not in front of Wendy!

Mabel: ...

Panel Three:

Soos: *thinking* Better get a shovel ready...

Dipper: *thinking* ERROR: 404

Stan: *thinking* I spend thirty years getting him back and Wendy decides to kill him in five minutes...

Mabel: *thinking* I wonder if I made the right choice... Of course I did! They'll be fine...

Panel Four:

Wendy: (vibrating with anger)

Ford: *thinking* Why is it suddenly so cold?

Panel Five:

Wendy: (GLARE)

Ford: (JOLT) *thinking* Where was she keeping that?

[cpericardium]

[transgender-catboy]

I'm gonna shower and then I'm making French toast, scrambled eggs, and bacon. it's been a minute since I cooked such a meal, maybe it'll be a good distraction

[jvhdb]

[molabuddy]

recently when im tempted to say 'i'm gonna kill myself' i try to correct it into saying "im gonna walk into the river and become a trout" or some other form of that. this is my new thing

[prokopetz]

I approve of powerscaling discourse only in utterly senseless contexts. I don't give a shit about which shōnen protagonists could beat up which other shōnen protagonists, but I will 100% read your five thousand word essay exploring the subtle nuances of establishing a tiered ranking of the Smurfs.

[werewolfmack]

A story to boost the morale of a broken country.

[lgbtqtext]

[aropride]

did… did she do that?

[dailykrusie]

Day 3

[queer-crusader]

Look I don't wanna bitch but if your Tumblr fic takes longer to scroll past than the Do You Love The Colour Of The Sky post then it would be kinda appreciated if you put the majority of it under a Read More button

[gallium-spoon]

A friend and I were discussing what we're like when we're sick and we decided people usually fall into one of these five 'sick modes': *Everyone is probably multiple of these at different times depending on how sick they are and with what but we think most people have a mode they default to and become more often than the others*

Delicate Consumptive Victorian: you feel tragic and mournful but also beautiful in a sad way, you are in bed, sipping hot tea, others should quietly whisper about how you are too good for this world, too beautiful, too tragic... And bring you more tea

Sick Dog: you are curled up in a ball, you don't want anything, you don't need anything, but it would be nice if others could still ask you if you need anything

Sickly Child Emperor: you are dying and it's everyone else's problem, you need pillows, no! you need soup, no! You need absolute silence or you will not be the first one to die today

Plague Pit: you are curled up probably on the floor, no one touch you, no one look at you, this is between you and God and you already know He has no mercy left for you

Warrior General: you are not sick. You are in perfect health and you don't know why anyone would think otherwise. Illness is an enemy that can be intimidated and you must remain strong for your men! (You are going to pass out at the most inconvenient moment possible)

[shamebats]

[chessb0r3d]

Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.

[prokopetz]

"It doesn't help your credibility to exaggerate, most employers wouldn't literally work you to death" like, I used to work in distribution. If booking a truck driver for back to back shifts until they fall asleep at the wheel, crash, and die counts as being worked to death, I have personally met employers who've worked employees to death and gotten away with a slap on the wrist. It may not be universal, but it's a hell of a lot more common than a lot of us would prefer to think.