#not. sure if i should tag eclipse since it's less of him and more them both fighting for control

[nebuladreamz]

We're so fucking back chat

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 325: Deku VS the Outside of U.A. ~Conclusion~

Previously on BnHA: Ochako was all “dear bloodthirsty mob, this kid you see standing before you has fought harder than anyone and put his life on the line to protect you all, so please chill the fuck out, jesus christ. like, putting aside that he’s humanity’s best hope and so it’s very much in your best interests to let him rest and recover someplace safe so that he can keep fighting for us, are y’all seriously going to turn away an injured and exhausted child in front of his sobbing mother?? seriously?? come on now.” I’m paraphrasing here but that’s basically how it went down. Anyway so then the mob was all, “...” and Deku collapsed to his knees in tears, and Gigantic Fox Lady and Kouta ran over to give him a hug but then the chapter ended.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “FINE, YOU CAN HUG HIM”, which, was that so hard?? The U.A. Clown Mob is all “come to think of it, we’ve kind of been taking the heroes for granted this entire time, maybe we should be less passive in the future. anyway so Deku if it’s not too much to ask, can you please save everyone and fix everything.” Deku is all “I sure can, and by the way I forgive you for swarming around all menacingly two minutes ago and trying to deny me basic shelter and stuff.” Ectoplasm is all, “hey Todogang get a load of this. [walks in a circle].” Hawks is all, “that’s literally the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.” Rat Principal is all, “anyway so that’s what your students did today, hope you’re enjoying your new *~*ROBOT LEG*~*, Aizawa.” Aizawa is all “[lots of exposition about Kurogiri and for some reason, Toga, while being all brooding and sexy].” All Might is all “[standing here right outside of U.A. doing absolutely nothing and being foreboding AF]” and that immediately sucked away all of the warm fuzzy feelings from the hugs, goddammit.

each new week has become a waiting game of “when will Deku finally get to take a bath so people will actually be willing to go near him and give him the hugs he deserves.” the stakes have never been so compelling. I’ve almost forgotten about AFO entirely

lmaoooooo

me: for the love of god will someone please give Deku a hug before I die of old age

Mineta: YOU GOT IT!! --

Iida: [SWIFTLY CUTS HIM OFF] NOT YOU

fucking losing it at Mineta’s crying face. he really wanted to hug him. I legit feel bad but this is also the funniest thing I have seen all week, omg

somehow Kouta, who last week was only a hand’s breadth away from touching Deku’s head, is now twenty miles away from him in this new chapter

can I make a Loki reference here. is this recap a good place to insert a joke about someone using a TVA time-rewinding device to fuck with my poor boy Kouta over here. well anyway there it is

AND NOW HE’S BACK ALL OF A SUDDEN OMG

(ETA: since when is he “niichan” omg?? can’t handle this cuteness.)

BUT THEY’RE STILL NOT HUGGING HIM FFFFKFFFFF. WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO. WHO DO I HAVE TO BRIBE AND/OR BLACKMAIL

OH NO KOUTA IS CRYING THAT’S IT I’M DONE FOR

“when I heard that lady I knew that I had to go, but then stop again within inches of actually touching you because you smell like week-old rotten onions.” listen Kouta, I’m not saying I don’t get it, but you all can’t keep doing this to me. it’s the way you guys keep teasing it. like, if you’re gonna hug him, hug him. don’t just stand there with your arms held rigidly out in front of you like a molded action figure

OH MY GOSH BUT HE SAID THE THING

KOUTA SWOOPING IN AT THE LAST MINUTE TO TAKE ALL THE CREDIT FOR FIXING DEKU LIKE THAT ONE KID IN THE GROUP PROJECT WHO DOES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING BUT STILL TAGS HIS NAME ONTO THE REPORT ANYWAY, WHAT A KNAVE

GASP

(  ´͈ ᗨ `͈ )

SHE PICKED HIM UP LIKE A LITTLE BABY OMG?? she just leaned right over and lifted this child like he was a small animal. like a lil baby futon that she was about to hang up to dry. oh my god

-- HEY WHAT

(: well that’s extremely fucked up. though sadly not too surprising given what we just saw these past couple chapters

incidentally, I hope that anyone who was legitimately defending the civilians’ perspective earlier takes note here of how quickly that line of thinking -- “we’re just trying to keep our families safe” and all that-- can lead to straight up bigotry. if you’re willing to deny a child shelter and protection simply because he’s not YOUR child, and because you’ve decided based on Internet rumors (no real-world parallels there, I’m sure) that he might present a threat, it’s really not that much further of a leap to discriminating against entire groups of people simply because you perceive those groups as being dangerous. I’m sure the people who turned Gigantic Fox Lady away also told themselves afterwards that they did it to protect their families. “better safe than sorry.” “she’ll be fine, someone will take her in, but as for us, we can’t afford to take that risk.” people can come up with all kinds of justifications for treating other people as less than human, and the really scary thing about it is how fucking easy it is

one last quick side note, which is that Horikoshi does a great job here of showing how scapegoating works, given that AFO is the one who’s really to blame and who presents the actual threat, and yet Deku is the one who ultimately winds up being the target of the mob’s fear and outrage despite him being as much of a victim as they are. gotta love that irony, which unfortunately plays out far too often in the real world as well.

anyway I’ll get off my soapbox now, sorry about that. let us continue

YES, FINALLY OH MY GOD!!!!

AND THAT’S THE STORY OF HOW GIGANTIC FOX LADY BECAME THE GREATEST HERO. PACK IT ALL UP, WE’RE DONE HERE KIDS

holy shit. the real MVP right there. thanks for getting it done champ

jesus christ I have had it up to here with these people

literally the bar is set so low at this point that I’ll go ahead and take it. helping him because it offers them a tactical advantage is at least one step up from not helping him at all

“WHY NOT SHIKETSU” MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

-- thank you!!

okay this one guy with the antennae hair is having himself a character development speedrun here

-- okay, but this part?? fucking this part, right here??

can we repeat that again?? the part where this guy acknowledges that the problems of hero society were caused not just by said heroes, but also by said society?? the part where he acknowledges that they treated the heroes like celebrities who were putting on a show for them?? the part where he acknowledges that when push came to shove, the vast majority of those heroes, when faced with a situation that offered no reward, were nonetheless willing to put their lives on the line to protect the very same people who then turned around and blamed them rather than thanking them?? are the civilians of BnHA even allowed to have actual deep thoughts about this stuff. holy shit

bro!!

ANTENNAE HAIR GUY SHOVING KOUTA AND GIGANTIC FOX LADY OUT OF THE WAY TO SLAP HIS NAME ONTO THE END CREDITS AS EXECUTIVE PRODUCER. CONGRATULATIONS SON YOU FIGURED OUT THE CORE PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION AT THE VERY HEART OF THE MANGA. WAY TO GO BUD

meanwhile, on today’s episode of “one more chapter to go till the big volume cliffhanger, how else can I drag things out let’s see”

it’s a panel. of people’s feet. just a bunch of normal feet. with sneakers and shit

this All Might shirt guy is getting more screentime in this arc than 90% of the class 1-A kids

I guess I’m supposed to feel sorry for this dude now that he’s all “if we let you stay here do you promise to somehow magically fix every single problem that we are now currently facing?” those are some ridiculously exacting standards my dude. come on now

KACCHAN SIGHTING

thank fuck I’m not the only one who’s thoroughly unimpressed by absolutely all of this lol. I feel better now. meanwhile Iida and Kouda and Kiri are ready to run over there and hug them all. you guys are way too forgiving. damn you and your pure hearts

anyway so Deku’s like “yeah, definitely”

(ETA: almost forgot to comment on the “I’m no longer alone” part – he basically corrects the guy and says “sorry, but you’ll need to direct that question towards all of us, not just me, because moving forward we’re a team.” good stuff.)

you know what though, all joking aside... fuck yeah. because perfect victory, right. the strongest guys don’t settle for anything less. so I guess Deku has pretty exacting standards himself

also can you all just take a look at this fucking kid who’s got so much light in his eyes now that I’m gonna need eclipse goggles. hot damn. “you’re welcome” says All Might Shirt Guy as he is frantically interviewed by several local news networks asking him how he daringly managed to save Deku all by himself. “well I guess I’ve just never been the kind of guy who can sit back and let a bunch of rabble-rousers blame a little kid for all of humanity’s problems. someone had to step in and take action, you know?”

oH MY GOD THE SCENE IS FINALLY ENDING

don’t let the door hit you on your way out All Might Shirt Guy

but meanwhile, sudden Tododrama action??

oh shit

there are honestly so many ways in which Ochako’s very moving speech could have wildly backfired that I genuinely have no clue where this is headed lol. how exciting!!

so now Horikoshi is once again stalling for time with random filler panels, but this one is 10x better than the shoes lol omg

(1) was Ectoplasm’s jacket always this oversized. (2) did you guys know that if you go back to chapter 319 you can see that Horikoshi gave us a sneak peak at Enji’s Sad Detective disguise and I in fact made a joke about it in the 319 recap not realizing it was actually the stone cold truth. (3) did Shouto deliberately speed up out of impatience because Hawks was walking so fucking slow and he couldn’t take it any longer. (4) and what, I ask you, is up with these dramatic speedlines. so many mysteries here. what a masterpiece

everyone is acting all shocked about something ahh what’s going on

wait what

what the heck. did they just loop around behind everyone. what was the point of that lol. “anyway, so this is what they look like from the back” well okay, thanks for that Ectoplasm

(ETA: so it seems like they were actually hanging out someplace else away from the crowd this whole time, I guess? here I thought they had more faith in Enji’s disguise. I guess Shouto and Hawks don’t particularly want to attract this crowd’s attention themselves right now either, though.)

I am so fucking confused lmao

speaking of All Might WHERE THE FUCK IS HE lol. but yes, good, OFA brings everyone together, and Hawks is very deeply moved about this out of the blue all of a sudden. you know how it is

aw heck yeah now this is another filler panel I can get behind

Mineta really wants that hug, good lord. I genuinely love this actually. Mineta if you could just stay little and cute and keep crying about how much you love your classmates in a non-gross way for the rest of the series I would be so appreciative. you’re doing great

IIDA IS HOLDING DEKU’S HAND THIS IS NOT A DRILL. ONE TIME WASN’T ENOUGH FOR MY MAN HE’S ADDICTED NOW

what did I tell you. Kiri wants to get all of the mob’s autographs now. Kiri you’re a peach

Shouji having a conversation with another mutant type is a very nice touch! we really need to get to his backstory soon. I feel like that casual remark from GFL earlier was kind of hinting at more to come

is this the first time we’ve ever seen the Yaoyorictionary in action?? never forget that Viz tried to call it the “Yaoyorozu Reference Book” because they hate fun

last but not least, KAMIBAKU IS BACK ON THE MENU, FUCK YEAH. Kaminari trying to spice things up and introduce a little bit of controversy by smacking Kacchan on the back of the head for god knows what. I will be deeply disappointed after this if I can’t find at least one person unironically declaring that KamiBaku is now toxic and abusive

lfkdlWLWK TODODRAMA??

oh my god. Shouto’s face. Enji’s face. the back to “oyaji” again. the blunt, not-taking-no-for-an-answer, “I don’t know how much louder the universe can scream at you that doing things alone is not it, so hopefully you got the point” directness of it. fffdlkslj I’m so ready for this Horikoshi please don’t fuck it up my expectations are so high

HOLY FUCK

I SCROLLED DOWN AND HE WAS ALL “( ❛‿❛)” AND I JUST WASN’T FUCKING EXPECTING THAT OKAY. JESUS CHRIST. GIVE ME A SEC

lol okay moment over and now Enji’s pulling his hat down all dramatically like a world-weary Cowboy

OH MY GOD WERE YOU FACETIMING??

AHHHHHHHHH

(ETA: not to put Iida down or anything, but it’s kind of strange that Aizawa is all “the class rep sure did great” when Ochako is the one that was giving that whole big speech for like twenty minutes just now lol.)

(ETA 2: “thank god Iida stepped in just in the nick of time to keep Mineta from hugging Deku.” sorry Mineta I really do like you lately but it’s still low-hanging fruit lol.)

HE LOOKS SO SAD??! HE LOOKS LIKE HEARTBREAK ITSELF??! I AM BESOUGHT WITH THE URGE TO REACH INTO MY SCREEN AND PULL HIM INTO THE SAFETY OF MY ARMS??? MY GOD, AND I THOUGHT DEKU NEEDED HUGS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okay I was gonna just hold down the letter H for a full minute and count it out loud but within about ten seconds I realized I needed to chill lol

-- but then again NO, I DON’T NEED TO CHILL, I HAVE ZERO CHILL, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE IT’S AIZAWA WITH A ROBOT LEG AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

COMPLETE WITH ROBOT TOES FOR THAT EXTRA TOUCH OF AUTHENTICITY!! I LIKE HOW HORIKOSHI PUT ALL THIS EXTRA “!!!” EMPHASIS AROUND IT IN CASE WE COULD SOMEHOW POSSIBLY FAIL TO TAKE NOTICE. “REMEMBER, EVERYONE?” SAYS HORIKOSHI HELPFULLY. “REMEMBER THAT TIME AIZAWA CHOPPED OFF HIS OWN LEG?” oh wow now that you mention it we somehow forgot all about that. like who do you take us for

OH NO NOT THE SAD BOYFRIEND ANGST THAT I WAS SECRETLY LOOKING FORWARD TO WITH GLEE

well at least he’s not M.I.A. or back with the villains again like I thought he might be. still, that’s gotta be brutal to know your friend is in there somewhere, but to not be able to reach him again no matter how hard you try. that’s the kind of angst that pays off in final battles just when you most expect it. such is my hope, at any rate

what’s this now??

trying to decide if this is Horikoshi’s way of saying don’t worry about that, or his way of saying definitely worry about that lol

anyway so Aizawa is out here being all irresponsibly handsome once again. when is someone going to do something about him

here for Sexy Robot Leg Eyepatch Aizawa clenching his fists and making speeches about revenge. pretty sure we’re all here for that

WELL, WELL, WELL

IT’S ABOUT FUCKING TIME

I’M VERY GLAD YOU’RE ALIVE AND SEEMINGLY WELL, THOUGH!

BUT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK THOUGH, ALL MIGHT

ffff. bracing myself for that cliffhanger next week. you’d better not touch one hair on this man’s head Horikoshi. I’m watching you 

[firelxdykatara]

gods, ok, apparently i’m not done.

atla fandom? we need to have a chat.

(....ok that made me sound pretentious as fuck. and maybe i am, but this needs to be said, cause i’m getting....real, real tired of a Certain Corner of this fandom and as a result, this is gonna be a discourse-heavy post so feel free to scroll past if that’s not your bag. as always, my salt posts all carry the catch-all #salt for ts tag, which you’re free to blacklist/filter at your leisure. i’m Very Annoyed at the moment, which will probably come through in the following post, so just. yknow. be prepared for that. or ignore it, that’s perfectly valid too.)

under a cut bc i do care for my followers and their sanity i swear lmao

there’s a real serious issue in this fandom with not understanding what queer terminology actually means or implies, especially when applied to a fictional narrative.

i’m specifically talking about ‘coding’, here. (if i were in a more meme-y mood, i might have said ‘the atla fandom found out about the term “gay-coding” and haven’t shut up since’.)

to the people who say ‘zuko is gay-coded’, i have this to say: you keep using that word. i do not think it means what you think it means. because he isn’t. i’m sorry, but he’s not! and the fact that this is such a prevalent claim in this fandom is distressing, bc it says to me that none of y’all know what gay-coding is or when and how to apply it! please, i’m begging you, go and look up these terms and what they mean and when they should be used before actually trying to plug them into your critical analysis, because when you misuse them and then call other people delusional for disagreeing with you it casts a pall over the entire fandom and is, i think, the root of some of the worst toxicity this fandom has to offer.

and the thing is, there are cases where gay-coding would apply--for instance, a couple series that are famous for queerbaiting their audience by coding their main characters as being attracted to one another (sometimes even despite their openly stated sexualities) come to mind, but those shows bare no similarities at all to atla and how zuko was written and portrayed! (and it would be funny, if it weren’t so obnoxious and infuriatingly wide-spread throughout the fandom, because the only queer couple we actually seen on-screen in either show wasn’t even queer-coded in any respect, and they’re canonically bi! [yes, i’m shading korrasami, or more accurately i’m shading bryke for refusing to give ka the build-up and development they deserved].)

this absolutely isn’t to say that headcanoning zuko as gay is a bad thing or invalid in any respect. (although the tendency for zukka shippers to do this specifically to keep zuko away from katara and/or invalidate his canon relationship/attraction to girls is more than a little eyebrow raising. especially since sokka is usually allowed to be bi, bc fans have no problem letting sukka stay in the background bc it’s no real threat, while jetko shippers are happy to have both boys be bi. [possibly bc katara is less a threat to jetko bc jetkotara is every bit as valid as any single ship between the three, but zukka can’t exactly let katara join in, and if the potential exists for zuko to be attracted to her then canon giving them the far deeper emotional bond becomes a threat to zukka’s existence? idk for sure--you be the judge.]) i prefer to hc zuko as bi (and always have, long before the atla renaissance), bc i don’t think zuko being attracted to boys is outside the realm of possibility, and it isn’t a threat to my ship since zuko&katara had a deep and emotional bond in canon that is very easy to develop further into something that becomes explicitly romantic--but the headcanon itself isn’t really the problem (although what it’s often in service to can be).

it’s the strange insistence that this is the only way to read his character, bc he was coded that way and so anyone who doesn’t see it must be too straight to understand--and i really shouldn’t have to say why and how that is so incredibly fucking insulting. (the ‘hetero lenses’ comment wasn’t cute when it came from bryke six years ago, and the same sentiment being repackaged and delivered by zukka shippers ain’t cute now.)

calling zuko gay-coded not only demonstrates ignorance as to what the term actually means, and how to usefully apply it in critical analysis, but also validates the frankly bullshit insertion of institutionalized homophobia in the world of atla where it was neither needed, nor wanted, nor ever hinted at in canon. as a queer woman i’m still infuriated by one fucking comic panel shoving institutionalized and systemic homophobia into a world where it was entirely unnecessary (and doing this in the first installment of the franchise showcasing a queer relationship??? making korra and asami worried about ‘coming out’ when they could have just gone on to have cute adventures together and tell people ‘hey we’re dating’ and have everyone else be ‘that’s awesome =DDD’ [because it is, in fact, possible to just have a world without homophobia i promise!!!!!] double yikes, i’m still pissed at bryke about it), and i doubly hate that ‘zuko is gay coded’ has become so widespread that ‘ozai hates him bc he’s gay’ has become a staple in that part of the fandom.

not only does making zuko gay and implying (or outright stating) that ozai hated and abused him because of it completely undermine zuko’s character arc by making his abuse about his sexuality rather than ozai’s toxic pride and anger at seeing himself reflected in his ‘weak’ son, but it comes very close to outright stating that abuse and trauma are inherently gay experiences, and they aren’t!!! they really aren’t, i promise!!!

abuse and trauma narratives exist outside of ‘my dad hates me because i’m gay’. and, quite frankly, there are MORE THAN ENOUGH queer trauma narratives out in the world. we do not need to start trying to retroactively make them canon in a series where they didn’t exist! if you’re gay and see yourself in zuko and project your own experiences on him, that’s understandable and valid. that does not make zuko gay-coded. and honestly, the insistence that he is makes very little sense to me, because you’re essentially trying to give the show credit for work you put into interpreting the characters! why would you want to do that? why not own your own headcanons and take credit for them, rather than insisting they are canon and everyone else is wrong for not seeing them??? like, i’ve said before that i’ve always headcanoned zuko (and katara) as bi, and even support it with my interpretations of evidence from the show, but the difference between ‘i think zuko is bi’ and ‘zuko is definitely gay-coded’ is that i know that bi zuko is my interpretation of canon, and that it is work i’m putting into the show that wasn’t actually intended by the creators/writers, no matter how much sexual tension i read into the jetko swordfight.

and like, zuko’s character arc doesn’t actually parallel a queer one all that well to begin with. it’s easy enough to do the work and twist it sideways just enough to make the general points fit, but the fact is, zuko’s arc is not one of self-discovery. it’s not one of coming to understand something fundamental about himself that he can’t change, that he was hated for, and coming out to his father in a dramatic confrontation where he shows that he understands himself and doesn’t need his father’s acceptance to be fulfilled.

zuko’s arc is actually one of trauma and healing. and those can (and often are--like i said, there are more than enough queer trauma narratives in the world, atla really doesn’t need to be one of them) be part of queer narratives, for sure! but they aren’t uniquely queer. and zuko’s confrontation with ozai during the eclipse doesn’t read like a ‘coming out’ at all. (yes, i’ve seen that post. yes, i rolled my eyes and moved on, bc unlike some people, i’m capable of not clowning on correctly tagged posts i disagree with.) zuko is specifically confronting ozai over his abuse, because his arc wasn’t about discovering anything fundamental about himself (and therefore realizing that ozai was hating him for something he couldn’t change)--it was about realizing that he was not at fault for the way his father treated him. it was also about realizing that the fire nation was broken and corrupt at its core, and that his father was an aspect of that he needed to break away from so that he could help the world begin to heal.

he says it himself:

Zuko: No, I've learned everything! And I've had to learn it on my own! Growing up, we were taught that the Fire Nation was the greatest civilization in history. And somehow, the War was our way of sharing our greatness with the rest of the world. What an amazing lie that was. The people of the world are terrified by the Fire Nation. They don't see our greatness. They hate us! And we deserve it! We've created an era of fear in the world. And if we don't want the world to destroy itself, we need to replace it with an era of peace and kindness.

making this about zuko being gay and rejecting ozai’s homophobia, rather than zuko learning fundamental truths about the world and about his home and about how there was something deeply wrong with his nation that needed to be fixed in order for the world to heal (and, no, ‘homophobia’ is not the answer to ‘what is wrong with the fire nation’, i’m still fucking pissed at bryke about that), misses the entire point of his character arc. this is the culmination of zuko realizing that he should never have had to earn his father’s love, because that should have been unconditional from the start. this is zuko realizing that he was not at fault for his father’s abuse--that speaking out of turn in a war meeting in no way justified fighting a duel with a child.

is that first realization (that a parent’s love should be unconditional, and if it isn’t, then that is the parent’s fault and not the child’s) something that queer kids in homophobic households/families can relate to? of course it is. but it’s also something that every other abused kid, straight kids and even queer kids who were abused for other reasons before they even knew they were anything other than cishet, can relate to as well. in that respect, it is not a uniquely queer experience, nor is it a uniquely queer story, and zuko not being attracted to girls (which is what a lot of it seems to boil down to, at the end of the day--cutting down zuko’s potential ships so that only zukka and a few far more niche ships are left standing) is not necessary to his character arc. nor does it particularly make sense.

(and before anyone brings up his date with jin--a) he enjoyed it when she kissed him, and b) he was a traumatized, abused child going out on a first date. of course he was fucking awkward. have you ever met a teenage boy????)

anyway, uh, that was a lot of words, so have a tl;dr: zuko is not gay-coded. there is nothing uniquely gay (or even uniquely queer) about his character arc or characterization, and he was certainly not coded gay in an attempt to sneak a queer character past the censors. if anyone involved with atla was gonna try that, it would’ve been in lok, and as established, they didn’t even manage to queer-code the actual queer relationship before the last few minutes of the final episode. headcanoning zuko as gay is absolutely fine (though if it’s only done to keep him away from female characters he may otherwise be attracted to, that smells more like misogyny than anything else), but insisting that this reading is the only one that makes sense, and anyone who doesn’t agree must be straight (hello, queer woman here making this insanely long thinkpiece) is very much not.

ship what you like, but stop trying to invalidate other ships and other interpretations of characters just to make your ship seem more plausible. it’s really not a good look.

[kedreeva]

I have this game I play with your bird posts where I try to identify the bird in question before I see your caption/tags. Thus far, I can only reliably ID Tanner the handsome rooster; the peafowl are so eerily identical.

Well, Orion should be fairly easy to tell, since he’s the only adult male purple I have, so any big purple idiot with a train is gonna be him! And Stan is the only cameo, so if you see a completely pale brown peacock with a train, it’s Stan.

Aris and Aurora are the only two blue pied hens. Aris you can tell, if you can see her face, because she’s got a nice long, well-tapered facial structure, but also the crown of her head is white and it extends in a clean line to and over her beak:

Aurora doesn’t have that nearly as cleanly, her face kinda looks like she got sprayed by mud. You can also tell by their right wings. Aurora has a dark patch on hers, but Aris has a line of dark feathers cutting her white. You can also look at the white on their throats (Aris’ goes farther down and has 2 steps to it) and the green on their necks (aris’ goes all the way to her shoulders, but Aurora’s stops short).

There’s actually a bunch of other ways I tell them apart, but a lot of them are behavioral.

As for the BS ladies... they’re a lot harder. Eclipse is the easiest- if you look at her primaries, they’re all white. She looks nearly white, no big brown patch at the back of her neck.

Major and Minor... well, they have those names because when I got them they were basically twins and I had no idea how to tell them apart. I know NOW that Minor has a couple of white primaries buried, and that she’s got blue on her face, which is more slender/tapered. And I know that Major has a more bulbous hawk head and an attitude problem.

Helios and Io are easy to tell apart- Helios has a big white spot on top of his head, and his wings have barred feathers. Io does not have white on his head, and his wings are splotchy because they will be solid colored. Helios also has a lot of white splotches on him because his pied markings are better.

Also every picture of Helios is blurry because he is less than 3 inches from the camera at all times.

Arcana.... She has 1 black feather on her left wing, and the brown on the back of her neck goes all the way up to and onto her head, and she has a huge white patch on her throat that gives her throat just behind her jaw this really cleanly delineated brown/white border. I don’t have any good photos of her, so maybe I’ll have to try to get a few soon.

Artemis... well. She never has any crown feathers. And although she’s a blackshoulder so she’s mostly “white” looking, she’s actually not, she’s muddy colored, and then since she’s pied, she’s got the nice white angel wing pied markings over her shoulders that give her a dark saddle on her back. Also she perpetually looks like an irritated 80 year old woman that wishes you would stop doing whatever nonsense you’re doing immediately.

A lot of how I tell them apart in person is personality, especially the blackshoulder ladies. Arcana won’t come within a mile of me unless someone else does first. Artemis will come right over and scold me. Major will also come over to scold me, but cautiously. Minor will trail behind Major (thus how I determined who got what name). Callisto will come over, but she won’t accept pets the way Jupiter used to. Eclipse could not care less about me- she doesn’t run like Arcana, but she doesn’t come over either. Helios desperately wants my attention at all times and does the same thing Stan used to, running around in excitement when I come out to the pen. Io only comes over when he’s pretty sure I have treats, and reminds me a LOT of his dad in temperament- cautious but not afraid.

Anyway, I hope those help you out with your game! It’s a fun one to play lol

[afinepricklypear]

**Update: The works mentioned in this post have since been taken down. The “message” was removed by AO3 because it was a violation of their TOS and it seems the author chose to remove their “opinions” piece.**

Despite the ongoing world crisis, I hope everyone is doing great as the year comes to a close and prepping for a safe holiday season.

I don’t really post here a lot, but I just wanted to talk about a problem that exists in every fandom and has recently come up for me in the BSD fandom. This problem is typically referred to as: toxic behavior, however, I sort of hate that term because it’s an umbrella term that encapsulates a wide array of behaviors that is purposefully vague so as to imply everything can be toxic, which means the definition changes depending upon the person, and ends up getting thrown around to describe any behavior that a person dislikes. That said, most people can agree that the term ‘toxic behavior’ includes “shipper wars” and harassing people because of their “ship”.

Yesterday, a user on AO3 going by the penname E_C_arts posted a message titled “deer Soukoku fans” and giving it the not-innocuous summary “please we’re begging you, please stop”. Clicking through leads to a rather prime example of this particular flavor of toxic fandom behavior, guised as an attempt to defend those who were allegedly victims of this self-same behavior, also a lovely example of emotional manipulation.

Although what’s currently posted (and what I managed to screen shot below) may not seem terrible on first glance, if not a little cringey, and can be easy to agree with (don’t bully people that write for a ship you dislike), this was not their original message and has been edited since being posted and, and only after receiving the number of comments it did and which they’re now noting as “proving their point” – a point which they erased, thus manipulating perceptions. I wish I had gotten a screenshot of the original, but if you scroll through the comments, you can find some people that quoted it.

This person most definitely did open their “message” to Soukoku fans by literally telling them to “stop writing” for it. They claimed there was some unspecified AU (or maybe multiple unspecified AUs) that had been overwritten for, that it was overused, and not original. They went on to talk about how the abundance of soukoku content was turning off new fans to the series (don’t even know how that logics…) and bullying people from creating content for other ships, basing these irrational sentiments off some false claim that removing everything with the soukoku ship from the fandom would only leave behind a sad, inacccurate (and oddly specific) 305 posts.

Evidence of their now deleted perspective can be further seen in another post they made to AO3 a couple days before this ugly rant. Titled simply “My unpopular BSD opinions”, they didn’t manage to garner much attention and went mostly ignored because, well, it’s your opinions about the show and that’s whatever. Of course, when you click into it, the very first “opinion” shared, is that they hate Dazai x Chuuya. Okay, that’s an opinion everyone is entitled to, and that’s fine. You don’t like the popular ship, that’s…not exactly an unpopular opinion, there’s quite a number of people that don’t ship soukoku. No problem. Until, they go on to elaborate.

Despite the title of this piece being ‘their opinions’, they state as ‘fact’ that its confirmed that this is “not a thing”, so ‘please stop shipping them it doesn’t work, it’s way too overused for it to be “funny” anymore’ (I’m a little confused about this wording, because Shipping is Serious Business™, so…not sure there are too many soukoku shippers doing it because they think it’s hilarious or whatnot, in fact, most soukoku fics are tagged ‘angst’, which we all know, angst is very ‘haha, lol’…but whatevs). They then include the same sentiment they expanded on in their Dear John to soukoku fans and subsequently deleted: “Please stop, there are too many au’s with almost the exact same plot Chuuya and Dazai being together, its really difficult to find any non-Dazai x Chuuya au’s”.

On the surface, once again, there are some “truths” to this sentiment. DaiChuu is a popular ship and there is a disproportionate amount of soukoku ship fics on the fandom comparative to other ships (soukoku comes in at a whopping 10,000+ currently, with the next popular ship Aku/Atsushi sitting at a decidedly less 2500+). It’s really not that difficult to find non-DazaixChuuya fics, if you know how to use filters on AO3, but there are going to be less to read from when you filter it down, and depending on your ship, you may find yourself in a fic desert, and I can certainly understand why someone young and lacking in rational thought processes might want to blame the popular ship for this predicament.

The problem with this logic, and it permeates every fandom, not just BSD, is that the shippers sharing and loving their ship are not to blame for your lack of ship content. You just don’t have a popular ship. If all the people who love soukoku stopped creating content for it, as this person is ‘begging’ them to do, that’s not going to increase the amount of content for your ships, because the reason that content isn’t being created is because there aren’t enough shippers for it. So, the only way this person’s logic works, is if what this person is actually saying, isn’t that they want these people to stop creating content for the BSD fandom, they just want them to jump ship, stop creating content for soukoku and start creating content for their ships.

Any creator/fan is going to have a visceral reaction to that: who the fuck are you to tell me what to create? And for free, no less!

This moves us more towards a clearer definition of what is toxic fandom behavior. In short, its telling anyone how they should interact with or interpret their favorite content. I mean, even Word of God does not have this power. That’s because every single fan in a fandom is an individual human being. They are possessed of their own autonomy, and as a creator I know, that once you put something out into the world and give it over to others, you have little control over how people consume and feel about your work. You can tell them your intention, but that’s not going to sway them to interpret it that way, and that’s…just the way it works.

Now, the elephant in the room needs to be addressed. It’s easy for me to be ‘offended’ by this person’s post and not see their complaints because I am a soukoku fan. I’m also the target of this person’s rant, and one of those people this person is attempting to emotionally manipulate into writing for other ships in the fandom for which I have no preference. But I am capable of seeing the other side of this argument.

First, because I do have other fandoms in which I am part, and for which I have a rare-pair ship. For example, I am a Gundam Wing fan and a 2x5 (Duo/WuFei) shipper. I’ve posted two 2x5 fics on fanfiction.net. While 2x5 is not the rarest of rarepairs in the Gundam Wing fandom, it is significantly eclipsed (as are almost *all* ships in the fandom) by the 1x2 (Heero/Duo) ship. Do I hate 1x2 shippers for my lack of 2x5 content? No. I just appreciate what I’ve got all the more, and I’ll create content for it when I feel compelled, and I sure the fuck won’t implore 1x2 shippers to stop writing for their fave and write more for mine because I want more 2x5 – that’s sheer entitlement, right there, pure and simple. I also ship 3xD (Trowa/Dorothy) in Gundam Wing, which *is* the rarest of rarepairs – I think there’s only, like, two stories in existence that features this pair on the entirety of the internet. I’m also a RavenxMurphy (Murven) shipper in The 100 fandom and I do not hate Bellarke fans because…those people are scary and have canceled the show’s creator for not delivering on Bellarke, and in BSD, I ship Atsushi/Lucy (yes, I said it, they’re cute af and I hope Asagiri delivers on that ship). I also low-key ship Yosano/Ranpo (sorry, Ranpo/Poe shippers, I understand the appeal, I just think him and Yosano is sooo cute, please don’t kill me…), and I also ship Yosano with Kunikida – all of which are some of the rarest in the BSD fandom.

Second, because I have seen and called out shipping harassment in the BSD fandom, so I am well aware that this kind of thing exists – as it exists literally everywhere and in every flavor. Against soukoku shippers from antis and by soukoku shippers against shippers putting Dazai or Chuuya with any other characters and by soukoku shippers against other soukoku shippers that are, uh, “doing it wrong”. None of these is appropriate. You’re not fighting fire with fire if you’re an anti-attacking the popular ship, you’re just creating a bigger fire and burning the entire fandom down. You’re not defending your ship if you are a soukoku fan attacking non-soukoku fans, you’re just punching down by attacking a less popular ship. And top/bottom arguments aren’t just toxic, they’re also deeply entrenched in fetishization of same sex pairings through a forced heteronormative lens and is, kind of, sort of, actually homophobic in its basis (yes, I said it. It’s ignorant and homophobic and trying to argue with ‘personality/physical traits’ as evidence of who serves what position in the bedroom can be emotionally and mentally damaging to members of the LGBTQ community. Claiming that Chuuya should be bottom because he’s shorter/smaller, or that Dazai has ‘bottom energy’ because he’s more flamboyant and ‘feminine’ is straight up discrimination – a shorter guy can definitely be top, and a manly man can be bottom, it’s not a behavior based on perceived gendered traits, it is just a fucking preferred sexual position, and no, you are not ‘fixing it’ by purposely using positions for these characters that eschews the stereotypes either. Trying to justify positioning by personality/physical traits at all, in any way, shape, or form is just not okay – if it’s your preference, it’s your preference, no justification needed, just recognize that it is *your* preference and arguing what’s ‘right/wrong’ positioning is just plain wrong).

But this brings us to a different issue: bad actors and blaming a whole community for a ‘few rotten apples’. I could easily lump this one person in with everyone that does not ship soukoku and deem them all toxic, aggressive, entitled, bullies attempting to harass soukoku shippers off the platform. Or I could see them for what they are, individuals with individual motivations and drives and morals that also happen to share the same shipping preferences. Is it true to say that there are no soukoku fans that engage in the behaviors described by E_C_arts? No, there are definitely those that do, as there are antis that engage in that same behavior against soukoku fans. But this person also asserts that soukoku fans turning ‘every BSD post about soukoku’ is also a toxic behavior. To which I refer you back to one. This is how they engage with and interpret the work. Don’t yuck on someone else’s yum. People want to gush about how cute they thought soukoku were in an official art, or that they felt there was some hidden (or not so hidden) interaction between them that validates their ship, or their inspired to create soukoku content based on it, so what (for the record, it irks me too when people go ‘see it’s canon and Bones totally ships it’, because it’s unlikely, given BSDs genre, that any romantic relationship will be confirmed, soukoku notwithstanding). It is not, in fact, toxic to gush over it. Let them have their fun with it, let them enjoy their ship. Now, if you go and make a comment about liking the art for other reasons and they reply to you about “…but also soukoku”, then still, that’s not toxic, that’s just them enjoying the content the way that they enjoy it, so let them enjoy it, and you opened yourself to engagement without any qualifiers for the type of engagement you were soliciting, you can’t then backtrack and go ‘but I’m not a soukoku shipper, they should’ve been able to read my mind and known that, it’s totally toxic of them to share their personal reasons for loving the show in response to my sharing my love for the show’. But if you comment about another ship, and they reply to you “…ew, gross! It’s 100% soukoku” then yes, that’s toxic. A lot of people fail to make this distinction, that they are, maybe, merely being triggered and not actually harassed, by feeling like their ship isn’t being validated because they see another ship all over the place and everyone they engage with ships it.

It’s also toxic, to take an experience with one person and hold every soukoku shipper in existence responsible for that one person’s inappropriate behavior. The truth is, that bad actors amongst soukoku fans are not unique, not to the ship and not to the fandom and not even to fandom culture in general. Every group in existence everywhere has bad actors in it that, while the group disavows their behavior, they continue to be held accountable for those individuals and judged by them. For current events, look at how the BLM movement has been blamed for bad actors (many of whom were not actually BLM activists) that took advantage of the protests and started riots and chaos. A small percentage of people were involved in these behaviors, but the entire movement, despite speaking out against rioting, continues to take the blame for it. For me, that’s the root of toxicity. We need to start holding individuals accountable and stop blaming people who have no control over those individuals, because they share a few similar beliefs or interests. That’s throwing the baby out with the bathwater. But the shippers as a whole are not to blame for the actions of a few, and the reason that it feels that there are so many more soukoku fans that do this is because of volume, there are so many more soukoku fans. It’s basic math. If two percent of fans are these toxic kinds of shippers, then there’s going to be so many more of them in a larger population than a smaller one.

I try to call out toxic behavior, no matter if it’s my ship being lambasted or one of my fellow shippers doing the lambasting, whenever I see it, but the trouble is, I don’t typically go into fan content that isn’t for my ship and, thus, I don’t see it. The same goes for the vast majority of soukoku fans out there. We’re here for soukoku content, we’re seeking out soukoku content, and avoiding what isn’t soukoku content. But here is my offer to all of those who are outside of my ship. I like to argue. If someone is harassing you for having a non-soukoku ship, call me, let me know, I will argue with them for you. I will explain to them in no uncertain terms, and in many unpleasant ways, that they do not represent the soukoku shipping community and they are an embarrassment to us. Content for any and all ships is welcomed and encouraged within the fandom. Write, draw, contribute, be a part of the fandom and express yourself, please. If you are a soukoku shipper (or even if you’re not), and someone is harassing you about your top/bottom preference, call me, let me know, I will argue with them for you. I will explain to them why their justifications for which character should be top or bottom in a same sex pairing is grossly misrepresentative and exploitative of the LGBTQ community and rather disgusting. Do not assume that because we seem to remain silent on these types of harassment that it’s because we are in agreement with them, it is only because we haven’t seen them – why would we, we’re not going in those spaces that weren’t created for us. Ask the community for help, don’t attack the rest of us for the poor actions of a few that we were not even aware of. Let us help you in policing them, rather than assuming we don’t care. We are just too busy staying in our lanes, but if you need us, we are here. Majority of us want a clean, friendly, welcoming community for creators of all types as much as you do.

All of this aside, there are spaces and places for these debates and AO3 is not it. Posting this kind of message is actually a violation of AO3 TOS, constituting as harassment, which is defined on the AO3 TOS as “…any behavior that produces a generally hostile environment for its target…”( https://archiveofourown.org/tos#IV.G.). This general behavior also falls into the realm of another kind of toxic fandom behavior: hijacking a platform/tag for your own purposes that is a direct contradiction to its express usage (otherwise, known as trolling). AO3 is for posting fan-made content that contributes to a deeper understanding and expansion upon the original work. Using AO3 to attack people who are using AO3 for exactly what it is designed to be used for is an abuse of the platform. It’s not okay and invites similar content that will ultimately interfere with the original purpose of the platform. AO3 is for fan content, not for your own personal rants about other people in the community, please keep it that way

I do also want to note, that this person choosing to edit their post after receiving the justified ire from fans (notably soukoku and non-soukoku fans alike upset by the audacity of this person, who, as far as can be told, has never themselves contributed fanfiction to the community, to tell people what they can and cannot write) for their original comments, is a form of manipulative abuse called ‘gaslighting’. They are now claiming to be a victim that “never said to stop writing”, despite that having been the literal words they used in the opening of their original post. They are now pointing at these comments as “proof” of their point that soukoku fans are aggressive bullies that attack without cause when there was definitely cause from the original comments. This person clearly has bigger issues than just lacking shipper content for their personal preferences on the BSD fandom.

To all of those who are afraid to share content for your ship because you think you’ll be harassed, as evidenced by this person’s claims, that is simply not true. While there might be one or two people that say something, we all get them no matter if you have a popular ship or a rarepair ship, haters are gonna hate – I’ve gotten my share of hateful comments towards my ships too, but there are many more people that share your ship and are interested in your content, in fact, some of them are starved for it. While having a rarepair might mean you’ll garner less interactions with your content, you have a better opportunity to form a deeper bond with the people that do interact, and they may be more appreciative, because what you’re delivering to them is so much harder to come by. The existence of one ship does not affect your ship’s popularity, and if it simply went away, that doesn’t mean that your ship would receive more attention – in fact, it might mean the show itself would receive less attention.

Create and let others create and use platforms for their appropriate purposes, and most importantly, when it comes to addressing toxic behavior in a fandom, look to yourself first. Are you placing the blame where it belongs? Are you addressing the root cause of the problem or swinging blindly and attacking innocent bystanders in the process? Will what you say actually help the problem? Or will it contribute to the issue, and maybe even create an issue that didn’t exist before?

[watchathon]

Avatar: The Last Airbender, Series Finale: Sozin’s Comet

In case you’re finding this post just by browsing the tags I’ve used for this post, this is the Watchathon, a blog where I’m hoping to watch an episode of a TV show every weekday, with a short blog post where I write down my thoughts as I watch. Each new thought starts with a hyphen and a bolded first word.

- Like so. Now that the introductions are over with, it’s time to break that one-episode-a-day rule and finish off Avatar: The Last Airbender with the climactic grand finale, Sozin’s Comet:

PART 1: THE PHOENIX KING

- Okay, so, Katara in the intro is still saying “He has a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone.” I could’ve sworn they removed that part by this point... Maybe that was just something for the DVD?

- I like that the “Previously on” segment is so long. It really emphasizes how much buildup there was to this. How much the Gaang has been through to get here.

- I gotta say, I was not expecting a beach party in this episode.

- Somehow, for reasons I can’t explain because I don’t understand them myself, this ambush from Zuko made the audio of Nicolas Cage saying “Surprise attack!” in Into the Spider-Verse play in my head.

- Zuko’s really lucky that he earned Katara’s forgiveness before this violent pop quiz, seeing as just a half season ago... “You take one step backwards... one slip up... give me one reason to think you might hurt Aang - and you won't have to worry about your destiny anymore. Because I'll make sure your destiny ends right then and there. Permanently.”

- It never occurred to me that we didn’t get details on the war meeting before now.

- I’d bet hearing about this plan is the thing that tipped the scales and fully convinced Zuko to join the Gaang, and prevent the genocide of the Earth Kingdom.

- It’s so nice to see Zuko being welcomed into the group hugs. Especially when it’s Katara who invites him.

- I like that Zuko is teaching Aang to redirect lightning, the same way Iroh taught him.

- Even before it’s made explicit, you can tell that Aang’s uneasy about the idea of killing.

- Toph is just delighting in her role as Melon Lord, isn’t she?

- Someone out there has definitely written an AU fanfic where someone gets killed during this training and it’s Toph’s origin story as the malicious Melon Lord. If not, then I will write it myself, and it shall be the crackiest crack fic that ever cracked.

- Y’know what, I wish Toph could’ve actually gone on a life-changing field trip with Zuko too! Everyone else got one...

- This scene of Sokka climbing into Appa’s mouth is even more uncomfortable once you’ve... well, once you’ve grown up and... Okay, I tried to put it subtly, but I just can’t: Once you’ve been cursed with the knowledge of what vore is.

- Well, there’s a bait-and-switch if I’ve ever seen one: “Azula, you’re the new Fire Lord!” “=)” “But I am now the Phoenix King and still your superior who you will answer to.” “=O”

- Nice to see June and her Shirshu make a comeback.

- Does this mean Aang wasn’t running away on purpose? I honestly thought he was just going to that island to get some alone time, maybe meditate or contact the previous Avatars’ spirits.

PART 2: THE OLD MASTERS

- I’m not sure if this is something I forgot from June’s first appearance, or if it’s actually just never been brought up before, but I didn’t know her Shirshu had a name.

- It’s sweet that Zuko is seeking out Iroh’s help. Even if the method of finding him is, ah, well... unorthodox.

- Even Avatar Roku doesn’t know where Aang is. And here I thought it was some Avatar thing that had never been brought up before.

- It’s nice to see these people make a comeback. Bumi, Piandao, even Jeong Jeong and Master Pakku are here for the finale.

- I am surprised that we didn’t get an interaction between Toph and Bumi, though. The man Aang wanted to teach him Earthbending, the girl who ended up doing it... But I guess there’s only so much time, and I don’t think there’s any scenes that could be deleted to make room for it.

- It seems like Aang is just searching for confirmation of his beliefs, rather than actually seeking wisdom.

- I like that we get to see Bumi taking full advantage of the eclipse to take back Omashu from the Fire Nation, instead of just being told about it.

- It’s nice to see so many past Avatars beyond just Roku and Kyoshi, Avatars that we never heard of before, but now we hear their stories. But all of these past Avatars echo the same sentiment that Aang should kill Ozai, even an Air Nomad Avatar.

- What can I say about this scene of Zuko and Iroh reuniting? Forgive me for echoing a post I made on my main blog, but this is a scene that’s both sweet and sad.

Sad, because Zuko’s abuse at the hands of Fire Lord Ozai left him anxiously expecting furious punishment for crimes much less than what he did to Iroh. He can’t even comprehend the idea that Iroh would forgive him. His expression while apologizing to Iroh clearly shows he’s expecting the worst.

Sweet, because Iroh still loves Zuko like his own son, and doesn’t even need to forgive him because he never felt anger at Zuko’s betrayal: Only sadness and a worry that Zuko had lost his way, truly lost his honor. And Iroh is so clearly happy to see that Zuko has found his destiny, and joined the fight against the Fire Nation.

I could go on and on about this scene... It’s my absolute favorite scene in the whole series and it brings me to tears every single time I see it.

Gosh... it’s gonna be so awkward going back to the jokes and little mundane thoughts after this, isn’t it?

- Okay, I have officially given up on the idea of finding out what the heck this island is.

- I like the smile on Katara’s face, when she’s asked to team up with Zuko and fight Azula.

- It’s nice to know that Iroh will get the opportunity to run that tea shop, even if Zuko won’t be there to work with him.

- Okay, okay, so the island was actually a lion turtle. Frankly, I’ve still got a lot of questions. Even some new ones.

- It’s nice to see that the Netlix subtitles aren’t ALLCAPS anymore.

PART 3: INTO THE INFERNO

- Gotta hand it to the music, it can make even a scene of Azula making a fuss over a non-pitted cherry rather unnerving.

- Azula’s... Azula-ness has gone straight up to eleven with her newfound role. Hasn’t it? What with all the banishments, even banishing the entire Dai Li.

- Sokka, Suki and Toph are the real dream team. 

- And we get a great final blind joke!

- I like that we get to see everyone doing their part in this final battle. All the members of the Gaang, even the White Lotus, get their moments to shine.

- The hallucination of Ursa shows that Azula, on some level, has an idea of what’s wrong with her. You can tell that they were thinking of a redemption arc for Azula come Book 4, though I am glad that didn’t happen.

- It’s chilling to see Ozai razing the forests of the Earth Kingdom like it’s nothing. And then to realize that this is what Aang will have to face.

- At first I wasn’t sure what Sokka’s plan was, but now that I see it in action, it’s really creative.

- I like the idea of a final one-on-one Zuko vs Azula duel(...a). It’s been a rivalry since Book 2, and it’s nice to finally see it get settled, even if I can’t imagine it’ll end up that easy: Otherwise, what would Katara do?

- It’s so cool to see Aang showing his prowess in all bending techniques, using them all in this final showdown.

- The background music during Zuko and Azula’s Agni Kai really sells it. It makes it sound almost tragic, and it is: two siblings pitted against each other, no choice but to fight to determine the future of the world.

- Azula might be slipping, but she’s still Azula, all too willing to cheat in what’s supposed to be a one-on-one duel.

PART 4: AVATAR AANG

- Netflix isn’t showing the intro for the individual parts, but I’ve gotta say... There’s no way that Katara’s still saying Aang’s “got a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone.” Right?

- I like that we get to see one last use of Metalbending from Toph in the finale.

- Dang, I hope this isn’t really the end for Sokka’s sword, or his boomerang. Especially when the sword was so cool, and one could say meaningful.

- I honestly wasn’t sure the Avatar State would ever be a factor again. But if there was ever a time, this is it. (ADDENDUM: This is probably the best time to clarify that I find and add the images at the start after writing the rest of the post.)

- And it’s so epic to see Aang bending all four elements at once.

- I like that Iroh got to burn down the Fire Nation flag.

- Since Zuko’s down for the count, I guess this means a battle between Katara and Azula, the latter powered up by Sozin’s Comet.

- To be honest, I could barely make out what Azula just said. “kjsdbksrbfkjvf family position to look after, kdcbkfh”?

- Katara may not be stronger than Sozin’s Comet-powered Azula, but she’s much more clever than Azula is right now as she loses her marbles.

- This is just the perfect kind of defeat for Azula. There’s no grace to it, no dignity, just writhing around, screaming and spewing fire as Zuko and Katara look on with pity.

- There’s probably a great practical reason someone could find for Spiritbending being a thing, but here’s why I’m glad it exists: Aang gets a happy ending. He gets to take down the Fire Lord, and hold true to his beliefs. If it weren’t for Spiritbending, if Aang killed Ozai, then he would be conflicted to the end.

And I don’t want that. I want Aang to get an unambiguously, undoubtedly happy ending, where the world is saved and that’s all there is to it.

Plus, Spiritbending is quite the spectacle.

- I’m guessing Sokka’s space sword and boomerang really are done for. But hey, there’s always headcanon. Maybe Sokka searched the forest and eventually found them.

- Weird to think that Ty Lee’s gonna be a Kyoshi Warrior.

- Again, I can’t believe Zukaang’s not the most popular Zuko ship in the fandom. Not a ship I’ll go to bat for, but it’s got all the hallmarks of a fan-preferred couple.

- It’s so nice to see Zuko’s coronation, and the official end to the war. It’s a happy ending for the whole world, the start of an era of peace.

- “Love and peace,” huh...? Now that’s funny to hear in the finale to this show, considering the next show I’m covering, come 2021...

- I like that we get to see one last confrontation between Zuko and Ozai. Even if Zuko’s question of where Ursa is doesn’t go anywhere (in the show, I know they touch on that in the comics), it’s nice to see the newly-crowned Fire Lord Zuko having evolved past a need for Ozai’s attention, or a fear of Ozai’s wrath.

- It’s nice to see the whole Gaang having fun at Iroh’s tea shop, in the end. And I stand corrected, this is where we get the final blind joke.

FINAL THOUGHTS

I’m lucky in that most of my childhood cartoons hold up as an adult. I watched Kim Possible, Phineas and Ferb, Code Lyoko, Courage the Cowardly Dog...

Still, there’s something special about Avatar: The Last Airbender. It had a unique aesthetic and world that no other show was quite like. It had a story that was like nothing I’d ever seen as a kid.

And it doesn’t just hold up, it’s even better.

When I was a kid, it was as simple as rooting for the good guys to win, and for the Firebenders to lose, except for Zuko once he turned good.

Now, as an adult (but mostly as someone with a DVD player/Netflix account so I’m not just watching whatever reruns I can catch) I can appreciate the character development, the arcs, the entire story.

I can appreciate how Aang grew from a little boy who does indeed have a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone, into a hero who could save the world.

I can appreciate how Zuko was an abuse victim who did what all abused children wish they could do and left his abuser.

I can appreciate... Gosh, Iroh’s entire character and dynamic with Zuko.

Some people say that Avatar “starts off as a kids show, then turns serious”, but I’d disagree. Avatar is a show where our heroes change, where they learn lessons, where they come of age and become the kind of heroes who can end a war that’s been going on for over a century.

As relieved as I am to be (mostly) done with these posts for the rest of the year, I am still oh-so-glad that I’ve rewatched Avatar yet again, and I know that I will be whenever I rewatch it in the future.

Now, with all that said... Farewell! Until the Christmas special, at least...

[sebastianshaw]

Let's go wide and predictable... Tell me about the different WoD incarnations for Shaw. :>

OK SO First thing I am glad you are also a nerd for this so I don’t don’t to explain all these terms. Secondly wow I need to be better about tagging/organizing, I couldn’t find all the other posts on this I was SURE I wrote. SO HERE’S A BIG FAT POST, RIP YOUR EYES

VAMPIRE Lasombra: This is the clan I typically default to in answers for him AS YOU HAVE NOTICED. I mean, they’re dark aristocrats who are all about Social Darwinish, preying on the weak, and the strong reigning. They primarily enforce this subtly through political games, but they have NO PROBLEM throwing an elegant Potence-backed punch. While one would think that these proud predators demanding sniveling obedience---and one would, in a way, be right---they certainly don’t RESPECT it, and it can even induce violent rage in them. Fits Shaw to a T. Sure, the Catholicism/Church control and Spanish origins and attraction to the sea and Abyss mysticism aren’t for him, but hey, he fits the outlook of the Clan perfectly aside from the religious aspects, and no one fits EVERY stereotype of a clan anyway.  Most Lasombra are Sabbat, and he could be too, but he would be in it for personal power, not true belief in being the Sword of Caine. I can equally easily see him going antitribu for the political power and stability of the Camarilla.  My other choices for him are VENTURE which is pretty obvious, but also Gangrel, which sounds counterintuitive but I HAVE A REALLY GOOD ARGUEMENT FOR IT! WEREWOLF Shadow Lord. Total Shadow Lord for pretty much all the same reasons as Lasombra. Like just LOOK AT THIS QUOTE: “ The Shadow Lords are a fictional tribe of Garou (werewolves) in White Wolf Game Studio’s Werewolf: The Apocalypse role-playing game.   […]  The Shadow Lords’ lives are like a daily game of chess and a constant struggle for power […] Shadow Lords respect power and condemn weakness, any cub who’s not strong enough in their eyes is banished from the tribe [… ] None of the other tribes like them very much, or at all, but even the ones who hate them most don’t question their ability to get things done. […] perhaps the largest camp, the Lords of the Summit tend to be the stereotypical Shadow Lords - power-hungry, manipulative, ambitious, and arrogant. This by no means makes them less dangerous foes.” And like. . . .they focus on political and intellectual power FIRST, and that sort of character is typically physically weak. But as with the Lasombra, nope, the Shadow Lords had bodily power too; they’re described as looking more like over-muscled pit bulls in lupine form than wolves. So....yeah, that’s perfect. Because Shaw does fight “smart” first, he ideally never touches his opponent, but when he has to? BOY CAN HE PULVERIZE. So, Shadow Lord Shaw is a Homid, probably an Ahroun but maybe a Philodox, and he has a lot of Glass Walkers following him as well as fellow Shadow Lords; he finds great use in their technological talents and ability to adapt to an urban environment and OWN it (rather than just SURVIVE in its fringes like a Bone Gnawer, as he sees it) and they organize themselves in a corporate-like structure where he takes a natural lead.  While the Shadow Lords are stereotypically/traditionally Eastern European, they can be of any race today. Shaw’s dad is English, but since we never see his mom in canon, for this version I’m saying his mom was a great big Eastern European Shadow Lord, and that’s why he never knew her, because the Garou aren’t typically raising their own young. He’s just. . . .big brutal wolf boy. And has like a billion puppies/Kinfolk kids. I DREW HIM FERA Ok, so I picked a BUNCH of Fera for Shaw, and you know why? I could. Literally just because I could. I don’t have a DM to tell me no! I even picked extinct ones, BECAUSE I WANTED TO! Cat-wise, I like him as a Khan or a Khara. Are the Khara extinct? Yes. Do they really suit him, the way they’re described less as warriors and more just secret-gatherers? Not at all. I picked them because I just like the idea of him turning into a massive, massive black smilodon. Because I think it’s cool and I don’t have to respect canon here. He can be the last of the Khara and not fit them at all if I say so. And hey, he LOOKS like a prehistoric man already! As for the Khan. . . .of the extant Bastet, the Simba and Khan fit him best. And if I am being honest? The Simba probably are a better fit for him. And I’m fine with that. I’m fine with Shaw as a big ol werelion with a black mane. But I also just really, really like the Khan. And as I have made clear, I am running this show. So my first choice for him that isn’t a Shadow Lord, is a Khan. They’re most typically Indian, Chinese, or (due to breeding with colonizers in India) English, so he could be one of the English Khan, and hey, fighting the Wyrm gives him a good outlet for. . . himself. Their human forms are also typically tall and HUGE, upwards of 300 lbs, and they’ve sired some of the most beautiful kittens and powerful bloodlines. T “ The Simba may declare themselves nobility, but the weretigers fit the title. Regal hunters and warriors, these Bastet evoke the respect the lions demand. From the snowy mountains of Asia to the cities of India, the weretigers hunt the spawn of Asura and defend the last of their Kin. They’re solid, dependable, smart and strong. Their weaknesses, such as they are, come from being too trusting or too sure of themselves. Khan are straightforward and action-oriented, not clever schemers. Whatever a Khan does, he does full-tilt — fighting, romancing, hunting, studying, even contemplating. These Bastet throw themselves into all tasks with vigor and passion, and their bodies, in any form, bristle with vitality. Most Khan love company; though few of them can stand the presence of another of their kind for long, they often enjoy companions. And who would deny a tiger’s friendship? It’s said the Khan were brought forth to battle demons, and many of them take that charge literally. Vampires, Asura and fomori have few enemies more relentless than a tiger. Perhaps that’s why the Khan have been brought to the verge of extinction: They made too many of the wrong kind of enemies.” “ The tribe’s traditional cultures stress honor and obedience. The treachery of Nagda was worsened by the stain it put on the tigers’ pride. While solitary in nature, most Khan establish protectorates where they defend a given family or land against corruption. The fact that “defense” occasionally includes killing certain people doesn’t detract from the tribal purpose. The Kahn were created to war against demons. Those who court the darkness must die “ “ While many Khan tend to be bad-tempered and aggressive, others love company of all kinds (and are powerful enough to demand respect). “ So, is that ALL Shaw? No. He’d be a particularly nasty, scheming Khan, in fact, a little unusual for his breed. But that’s hardly unheard of. After all, the famous English Khan named Lord Clouster “had cobras for a heart; he tossed his own kuasha beneath the wheels of a train, fed his wife to a suttee fire by pretending to be dead, then killed his children when he found they did not carry the Changing Touch.” And another Khan, the Indian sultan Nagda, got into a feud with another Khan and “ taken over by his rage, the Sultan Nagda betrayed his race and used a tribal secret. During an eclipse, his assassins struck all over Asia, slaying nearly 100 Khan and many Kinfolk outright.” So, Khan can be bad too.  But not as bad as the Simba. “ “The Lords of Sunlight.” That’s what they call themselves. Like the blazing mane around the heads of their kings, werelions liken themselves to the sun. All things have a place and an order and rebels must be reminded of this fact. The real fact, of course, is that the other tribes dislike the lions; the Simba may call themselves “Lords of Sunlight,” but many other cats give them another name: “The Dark Kings,” an unflattering comparison to the Khan. The Simba aren’t villains; they’re magnificent lords, slayers of demons. Things are simply out of order. When the balance is  restored, when the humans know their place and the cities become graveyards, the lions will be proven right. The demons of the modern age can be traced to the end of the Impergium and the laxity of the Changing Breeds. The Simba mean to put things in order, and if that requires bloodshed, so be it. Warfare is the sport of kings” “ Werelions value strength and order. Despite their bloody reputation, Simba adore their loved ones, and watch their Kinolk closely. Children and kittens are raised within the pride and must constantly prove themselves to survive. “ “ Each pride has one Mtolo (“father”), or dominant male, and several Kirii (“wives”) and Anwana (“young hunters”). Small prides defer to larger ones, and may owe allegiance to a Chakuva (“High King”) like Black Tooth. “ So, Simba are very patriarchal, very hierarchal, and want to run everyone else and feel they’re entitled to do so by birthright,  and the more I talk the LESS it sounds like Shaw actually? Like don’t get me wrong, he’s proud and power-hungry AS YOU KNOW, but what sets him apart from Apocalypse or Magneto or Xavier is that Shaw has never sought to have mutantkind follow him. He has his own ideologies, but he has never sought to lead others or enforce it on them. So really, the Simba mentality of “we should be in charge because it’s us” DOESN’T work for him, nor does the idea of being entitled to do so, as Shaw’s “power first” mentality is all about EARNING your position, not deserving it automatically. It’s all very Fabian though! So I’ll leave that here as a bonus for you instead of going back and deleting it lol. yEAH HE’S A BAD KHAN, BASICALLY And his Pyrio, no matter what cat type he is, would be Night.  Each Bastet has a “Pyrio” meaning a classification of their general personality and what fields they’re likely to pursue and be talented in. “Like the Dark Father Cahlash, the favor of the Night indicates a sinister or hidden nature. Most Bastet with this Pryio tend to withdraw from others, concentrating on their own business unless interrupted. Although they might not be actively malignant, they have short tempers and quiet ways, and fiercely guard their privacy. Night Bastet prefer occupations such as assassin, scholar, scientist and dark mystic. In the wilderness, the Night cats are hidden hunters and man-eaters, with nasty dispositions and an eerie reputations. These are the cats whose deeds are told around campfires for years to come. If you’ve got a disposition toward the Night, activities that cause others discomfort, reinforce your private space or protect some valuable secret from outsiders can refresh your Willpower.” So yeah. Shaw is a night kitty.  Rats are not the type that fit him the MOST, but I drew him as a RATKIN WARRIOR anyway. Because rats. Also while I drew him as a Warrior, he could also be an Engineer or a Plague Lord (specifically sylphyllis; every Plague Lord contracts with a disease spirit and embodies its most horrific symptoms and I just love the idea of this hideous terrifying syph-ridden Shaw) And hey, he can get into the “culling humanity” and “survive so that you may breed” deal! Most wererats also have very little kindness towards the weak either, despite being the underdogs of the Fera themselves. Likewise, hyenas aren’t the breed that fit him the most but I kinda dig the idea of him as an Ajaba? Their role was choosers of the slain, tasked with culling the sick, dying, and unfit. They were called rainmakers because of the tears their task brought to others, and they did not spare even their own. Then, the Simba came to their lands, and enacted genocide against them. They left Africa and spread across the globe, now breeding indiscriminately to survive and can be any race. What holds them together now first isn’t any duty, but the desire to simply stay alive. And both those things---culling weakness, and being knocked off his pedestal and now forced to fight for scraps in the shadows to survive---seem fitting for Shaw. The philosophy is obviously what he’s always had, and the degraded position reflects where he currently is in canon. He’s not usually the underdog, but he is here---but doubtlessly a brutal one, the Fera equivalent of a gang leader, recruiting  Also they’re matriarchal and I kinda like the idea of him having to deal with that, as....that kind of fits too? Shaw was the only MAN of note in the Hellfire Club. All the other most iconic, powerful, threatening members were women, and Shaw’s never really had a chance (or tried to fuck with) any of them. He’s USED to being around a ton of badass ladies who are calling the shots, that’s just TUESDAY for him.   Finally---FINALLY-- I could see him as the odd human-born Rokea. A Great White, of course. Again, it was probably his mother who was the Fera, some monstrous creature who came on land and mated with his human father, only to spawn this boy while still out of the water. All Rokea are ugly in their human state, but Shaw looks better than most due to being born on land and as a human, and he is also able to move through---and thrive---in human society. Since he is seen as a Betweener---one of the Rokea who “betrays” the Sea by living on land instead---stepping into what should be his natural habitat is always risky for him, as other Rokea WILL kill Betweeners on sight. And the single-minded nature of sharks leaves little room for explaining oneself.  Oh did I say finally SURPRISE I HAVE ONE MORE. The peaceful, matchmaking, extinct Apis don’t really fit SHAW aT ALL, and they’re EXTINCT, but I love the idea of him turning into a HUGE BLACK BULL. So here’s my explanation. The deal with the Apis is that when their numbers reached the single digits, a last handful of young Apis called Last Hope went into the Deep Umbra and haven’t been seen since. The “hook” in the 20th anniversary Changing Breeds book for their return is that maybe they finally came out the Umbra and back to the physical world. My idea is that he and HAVEN are mebers of Last Hope who have re-emerged in modern times to bring back their kind---something that rests entirely on SHAW’S shoulders, since Haven’s womb was cursed by the Wyrm. So it’s up to him to just breed with as many women and cows as possible. So he’s got an excuse! And as for why he’s so un-Apis, my explanation is that the trauma of their species being wiped out and the time that was allowed to fester in them during their long sleep in the Deep Umbra, drove Haven and Shaw to two extremes of Apis behavior. Haven took on the gentle caretaker side to the extreme, becoming so pacifistic she can’t fight or defend herself. Shaw went the other end, becoming so enraged and resentful that he’s become more like a bloodthirsty predator himself.  Eventually, they both fall to madness after re-emerging, but in the opposite ways that everyone expect. It’s the sweet gentle Haven who ends up Frenzying other of control in a berserker rage, rampaging across the city in massive bovine form, causing untold death and destruction until she’s put down. . . .while the cruel violent Shaw falls to a “cow version of Harano” sinking into a depression so profound he goes catatonic up until Haven’s own loss of sanity, at which point he throws himself on her horn. The story ends with the last of the Apis truly dead, but with a new hope for the species living on in Shaw’s children, who are showing signs of being Kinfolk or Apis themselves.

[fangirl1029]

going home pt 3

an; sorry not sorry for the cliff hanger at the end of part two. This will be a series as you guys can tell. By the end of this part we should be moving onto eclipse. The first two parts take place in new moon.

part one 

part two

Sam Uley x Jacobs sister 

She woke up on Sam’s couch half of her face in worse pain than the other half. She could only see out of one eye due to the bandage on her face. She looked around the room confused. “what happened ?” she asked when she saw a figure in the room.

 There was yelling in the back , it sounded like her father. “ you had a job for less than a year and now look at my daughter! She could’ve died due to you Sam! She may never see out of that eye again and if she never talked to you it’d be too soon.” “dad? why are you here” y/n was leaning against the doorway using all of her strength. Sam looked down at the ground ashamed in what had happend to his imprint on his watch.

 “ you got hurt by me , we were fighting and I lost control , I shifted and you were too close causing you to get hurt.” y/n sighed , I should go to the hospital and get it looked at. I can tell you guys were more worried about fighting than getting me to a safe place and getting treatment, neither of you come , ill get leah to take me.” Y/n walked away her blood boiling. 

Leah drove y/n’s truck to the forks hospital that one being the nearest one and that Dr.cullen was there so hopefully she wouldn’t have to try to come up with an elaborate lie. Leah broke the silence “ I know you probably think I hate you but I understand that imprinting isn’t something you can change.” y/n sighed “ yeah I know its fate.... but I can’t help but think that I don’t want to see him anytime soon” Leah glanced at the girl. “ it’ll take some time but it’s not really something you can change. It’ll hurt Sam more than you but it’ll still hurt you greatly. imprinting doesn’t just affect the wolf but his imprint.” y/n chuckled” when did you get so wise” Leah smiled slightly as they pulled into the hospital. “ just have had a lot of time to think since Sam had to go and imprint on you.” y/n rolled her eyes only the one not covered showing.

Dr.cullen was very gentle and understood instantly of why she came to him. “ I know this is scary for you. But if people ask you have to say you were attacked in the woods by something. Im sure Sam didn’t mean to hurt you since hurting imprints hurts them more than their imprint as far as I know.” Dr.Cullen took the bandage off her face showing three long scratch marks on her face. “ I’m afraid youll have a scar for the rest of your life though.” y/n sighed and looked to leah “ it’ll look better once it’s healed I promise.” Dr.Cullen continued to run some tests and eventually gave y/n care treatments 

Y/n went to her house. It was oddly quiet compared to how loud it normally was. The only person she messaged letting know about what Mr. Cullen said was Jacob.She should’ve made him swear not to tell Sam or her dad because she was still very mad at her father and needed some space to figure out what she wanted to do regarding Sam .  However the telepathic link between the pack and her brother gave away the situation very fast. Within 5 minutes she had half of the pack at her door. Y\n opened the door and sighed looking at them “ what do you guys need?” Paul pulled her into a hug fast before anyone else could. She looked over his shoulder noticing Sam wasn't there she sighed. Y/n couldn't help that Sam had imprinted on her or the fact she got hurt by him and she still wanted to see him. After a while it was only y\n , Paul and Jacob. They looked at the clock and she smiled nodded letting them know she'd be fine alone while they went on patrol.

There was a knock at the door later that night. She got up to go open the door. There stood Sam , her alpha in her doorway soaking wet from the rain and shirtless as always. This didn't stop her from wrapping her arms and legs around him getting soaked.  He caught her and walked into the house. “I thought I was going to get the door slammed in my face but I enjoy this more.” Sam put her down “ I know we need to talk through things and I'm sorry that I've been super protective and on edge. I really don't want to lose you and you could be targeted and killed , that scares me to no end.” y/n looked up at him. “It scares me too you could leave one day and be killed by something.” he sighed and embraced his imprint. “I promise I'll be fine. We’ll be fine.” 

Y/n sighed and looked at Sam who had left mud prints where he had walked. “ you sir are cleaning that after you change.” Sam looked down at the prints and made a ‘ oh shit’ face. “ i’ll meet you in bed alpha” She whispered into his ear earning a growl and huff. As the happy couple laid in bed y/n’s head on Sam's chest and his hand protectively on her back Alice's vision about the new born army was brewing. Little did everyone know but the small troubles Bella had caused before was nothing compared to what would happen now.

Tag list @percussiongirl2017​ @artisthedgehog​

[danwhobrowses]

WWE Royal Rumble 2021 - Initial Thoughts

I know I’m late, but employment is still a thing, and I had to prioritize that over an all-nighter, but it’s time for the Royal Rumble, one of the more exciting shows of WWE’s schedule, so let’s get on with it!

Spoilers for Royal Rumble, you have been Warned

I might not invest too much in kickoff matches but the Women’s Tag Match was not a good time

It was fine before the end, but who the hell decided that Charlotte should control 90% of the champions’ offense and have the hot tag!? Asuka is the RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPION, not Charlotte. After the tag Asuka literally had one spot and she was dead, completely taken out of the match for *checks notes* being thrown over the Announcer’s Table...you know that thing several wrestlers come back from easily.

The finish was just too much too, Ric distraction didn’t work, Lacey distraction didn’t work, Kirufuda Clutch didn’t work but then the brass knuckles did. Too much.

And why TF are we putting titles back on Nia!? We should’ve just given the titles to the Riotts, or the winner of the Women’s Dusty Classic. It also cuts me deep that Asuka and Shayna are treated this way, even as champion Asuka is a side character to Charlotte T_T

Main show though and I don’t like the package and interviews between entrances

Drew vs Goldberg was just...meaningless.

It was cringy enough that Cole had to spout drivel to make 60 year old Goldberg seem strong but to have Drew be ‘injured’ by a barricade spear - something much more tired wrestlers have and will get back up from in less time and continue a longer match - was daft. Also saying that Goldberg’s spear or jackhammer is the best move of all WWE is stupid, it was a WCW thing

Thank God Drew Won, but the post-match does remind you of the meaningless circumstances this feud came about. Suddenly Goldberg is okay with Drew’s same manners of respect

I mean, Carmella’s entrance and gear is cool, but do you think it eats at Corey a little that Carmella’s ‘behind the curtain’ bit is a tad...red light district?

Sasha’s promo didn’t hit for me unfortunately

Reginald didn’t deserve to be ejected for that! He caught Sasha and get beaten up for it

Jesus Carmella! Sasha got barely any of that dive

Screeching and faffing aside, Carmella got a good showing...I do hate quick tap outs in title matches though

Sami cuts a good promo, but his content wasn’t exactly the best. New Day are hardly the management’s faves, it’s taken this long for E to get a singles run, Fans literally had to Yes Movement their way into giving Kofi the world title.

New Day’s Brodie gear was good though

Bad Bunny as the ‘Biggest Latin Artist’? Is Cole for real? I didn’t even know who he was before today

If the song is about Booker T then why is he dancing around GI Bro?

Come on Book, you hang on the Sucka! That’d be like if the Rock just went ‘If ya smell what the Rock is cooking’ without the drags or pauses

Ric’s ‘with a tear in my eye’ promo was after the Rumble though...

It’s actually a sad stat that just over half of the Rumble winners win titles

No Morrison segment for the escape spot!? He did it as much as Kofi dammit!

Sorry Greatest Royal Rumble is not canon for me

This Stat Attack has taken far too long

I’m okay with Mike Rome but couldn’t a woman have announced the Women’s Rumble? Where’s Lillian at!?

NAOOOOOOOMIIIIIIIIIIIIII GIRL WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!?

That hair is amazing as well

I know you can’t say it, but we all remember that Benoit won the rumble in the first two as well

Was...Bianca wearing earrings on her entrance, she looked like she was taking them off

Billie actually had the right idea, can’t be in the match until you enter the ring, it’s clever stuff

That tank did not look like it was meant to turn that direction XD

It actually surprises me every time how tall Shotzi is, I always imagine her short

Billie no...not with Shayna

The piped boos are highly unrealistic to boo even a heel Toni Storm

Shotzi eliminated and then horrible singer Jillian comes in? Urrrrgh, Bad Singer Jillian was terrible

Wrestling wise she hasn’t missed a beat though

Billie’s surprisingly being a highlight here with actual narra-OHMYSHITITSVICTORIA

Gear was a bit meh but Victoria definitely can still go

Oh Peyton the purple looks good on you, and her Widow’s Peak was not bad at all

Ah, good for Santana, for a moment I thought it said Santina and got a very bad chill

Damn Liv, Speed Machine!

Ooof, the betrayal is real Billie

THIS IS MY BRUTALITY!

Somehow I’m genuinely upset by every elimination so far, good job!

Aaaaaand then they got rid of Victoria and brought on Charlotte to immediately take out Rhea -_-

That was a clever move from Bayley but damn Ruby landed hard

Are we seeing a Bayley/Peyton team? Or is she just eliminating the Riotts for revenge for Billie, but also Liv Nooooo!

Torrie now, eh okay

Ouch for Dana

Lacey...no, this ain’t working

Poor Peyton, her elimination was a side chapter

And we missed Bayley’s elimination!? For Shame

Mickie! Good to see ya! Aaaaand being beaten by Charlotte...

Nikki Cross is back too! Hopefully they find a good story for her

Alicia Fox? I guess she sobered back into the good gra...R-Truth? No

Oh yeah, Humberto is a thing

Jerry shut the fuck up!

The 24/7 stuff was super unnecessary, we did not need to take focus off this match

Lacey eliminating Mickie, rude.

Dakota should’ve gotten more time, she barely lasted a minute

Reginald again deserves better

See Tamina vs Rhea would be exciting...if Tamina was booked better

Naomi’s chemistry with Bianca is really insane right now

Lana *reminded of her feud with Shayna and Nia* Also Lana *goes for Rhea*

That was a hard tackle on Alexa by Rhea...aaaaand she’s eliminated mid ‘transformation’ a bit worthless for me

Road Warrior Ember Moon! And right into the Eclipse that’s the good shit

Baszler probably shouldn’t have eliminated Lacey story-wise

The Betrayal is real for Tamina as well

What’s with the crazy camera cuts!?

Nia eliminating Baszler? Nah...

Hold on Cole, baiting Nia over the ropes isn’t a ‘tremendous elimination’

The betrayal is real for Lana too, Nattie sure shrugged off that double assault

I get that the narrative is that Charlotte has beaten both Bianca and Rhea before, but to hang against both of them after already being in a match and hanging on from two apron attacks was daft. Stop making her super strong, she’s mega talented yes but giving her the Brock Lesnar energy does her no favours

That close call though with Rhea and Bianca was great, need more spots of two wrestlers about to be eliminated at the same time

The final bit of chain wrestling too was great, that’s what you need at the final part of a rumble, the mini-match

I had Rhea as my win prediction but am more than happy for Bianca, who was my second choice. Winning at No. 3 is great and her emotional promo just gets her more over. Bianca vs Sasha’s gonna be wild too

Overall the Women’s Rumble was good, most of the women got shine and there were a few mini stories too, do wish that more time was given to some women and that Sonya was in the rumble but the returns were good and most of the eliminations got me good

Miz talking about guaranteeing a championship run like he didn’t lose the last cash-in and didn’t have a chance to cash in previously this night when Drew was ‘reeling’ from the barricade spear.

I reiterate that I wish Sonya was in the rumble, but do like her endorsement of Bianca

Again, this 24/7 stuff is wrong place and time right now

Last Man StANDing Match for the UniVERSal Championship

Cole, there is Champion’s Advantage. Triple H vs Michaels Last Man Standing, neither men made the 10 so Trips kept the title, 17 years ago. Royal Rumble 2004.

See, this is where a Finisher Spotfest works, because it’s not about pinfalls it’s about keeping people down

The camera switches are not doing good on this portion of the side of the thunderdome

Yes, attacking the knees, this is the Cerebral ‘rope breaks with his pinkie finger’ Owens I like to see

Ooof the Golf Cart, a la Kane and Stadium Stampede

Why is this training area just like a second arena

Lil’ running ref in the background

Right into that conveniently placed mini-ladder

Not the forklift! Think of Judy Bagwell!

Oh that curtain is the thing Becky took a photo of! I mean she was always gonna be backstage

Corey before the match ‘there must be a winner’, Corey after Owens went through the stage LED ‘The ref should consider stopping the match’

Did the Ciampa move there to stand up

I don’t think you’re allowed to use a Ref Bump that way

Then the Second Ref restarts the count and stops at 5!? If this doesn’t come back next SD it’ll be a misstep

It was a physical match, not the best I think the finish brought it down. The problem is that KO has lost 3 times now and the last time is a botch finish, and we can’t have him lose again - the poor guy needs a win

ON THIS DAY, I SEE CLEARLY!

I will say this immediately, revealing Edge and Orton as 1 and 2 beforehand was a terrible idea, just because you don’t have a live crowd doesn’t mean the people watching from home can’t be surprised

‘Number 3 is the worst number to draw on average’ - Belair just won at No. 3

Ali at 4? Then went after Edge and not Orton?

Sami, just don’t get in Orton’s face

Refs what are you doing? No rules in Rumble, where were you with Nia and Shayna with that logic

‘What does Shin need to do to be more successful?’ - for one not face AJ Styles, he is still a tag, US and IC champ as well as a RR winner, that’s quite successful

Carlito finally shows after the Legends Night tease and yes those are some abs

So...Randy’s just sleeping with this knee injury

Big E enters with some snappy camera angles again

I was hoping for more Ali - especially since Ricochet came immediately after - buy angry E was nice to see

Wait is that Elias’ entrance? Where’s the guitar strum?

Priesty, wonder if this is his main roster call

What DJ leaves his equipment on stage anyway?

‘The biggest star in the world in the music business’ - for real?

‘I’ve heard of flying squirrels but flying bunnies!?’ - Corey you need to watch Tokyo Joshi Pro, they got a flying sugar rabbit

To quote Ross Tweddell, MMMmmm Riddle...does not do it for me

Stop with the camera cuts I beg of you!

Mayor of Knox County!?

Ricochet eliminated by Kane, le sigh

The betrayal is real for DBry

Big Elim for Priesty though

‘Now it’s a Royal Rumble’ - reminder that Edge is a KOTR winner too, and that Nakamura is the King of Strong Sty-oh and Corbin eliminated him :/ what was the gauntlet about if you’re gonna Corbin him?

Otis’ new gear is slick

aaaaand Corbin’d again

Big Dom Fuck im Uhhhhhh Spinebuster’d

Damn he got him though

Dang that bounce sound from DBry

Bobby no why you gotta do Dom like that!?

Hurricane back from his Gangrel crossing and disposing Sammy Guevara’s broken body in Elite Deletion to do another rumble

One of these days, he’ll hit that Chokeslam and shit will go wild

Christian! This time getting the more emphatic reaction

Oh that smile, that hits you in the chest cavity...then Riddle ruins it

Rey comes in and WWE made him an advertisement ¬_¬

Edward James Omos what are you doing? well...I know what he’s doing, IC feud between AJ and E

Edward James Omos fuck you for eliminating Rey

The betrayal is real for Shamu

Cole how did you know it was Seth before his entrance hit?

I don’t think we were supposed to pick up Shamu welcoming Christian back but that was sweet

Then finally BWOAR

And Bwoar eliminates Cesaro, what was the point of his push? (it’s because his contract’s nearly up isn’t it?)

Again with the camera switching

Seth No! And where’s the boos pipe music!? DBry was a heavy favourite, that would’ve caused heat

Can’t believe Mmm Riddle lasted ahead of DBry

I didn’t forget about Orton, but the finish was good, that Orton tease got us good

It was a decent rumble, in hindsight you could tell Edge was winning given how they put express focus on Michaels winning at number on in the stat attack, Edge being face in peril for the first 10 entrants and Cole reminding us how long Edge has been in there

I don’t at all hate the end result, though I do question whether it was the best choice in the long run. Edge had his rumble win returning from injury already and throwing more legends at Drew does imply a heavy lack of depth in the current roster. Edge didn’t really need the win, but I’m not disappointed in him winning

The Men’s Rumble itself wasn’t as good as the women’s I don’t think, a lot of favourites of mine were unceremoniously dumped out quickly, any layered storytelling didn’t get enough time and it did feel a little by the numbers, almost a microcosm of modern WWE booking

Overall it was still a decent PPV, happy with the winners of the rumbles and that’s mostly all we need from a Royal Rumble. The Road to Wrestlemania starts here

[peeterparkr]

clear|19|t.h.

CHAPTER 19: SUN AND MOON

pairing: surfer!tom x reader

word count: 5.8k 

warnings: angst, death mention, it’s a funeral... I mean, cancer mention, fluff, too?, OH AND THIS IS LIKE 100% WRONG AND MADE UP, this is in no way accurate greek mythology 

summary: the sun and the moon were lovers. 

series masterlist playlist previous chapter next chapter

wanna be tagged?

Hello! So, there’s only one chapter left and an epilogue. This has been one hell of a ride and I thank everyone who’s been reading this story.  Please tell me what you think, your comments make my day. I’m on my finals and I’m super stressed so maybe a little cheering up? I loved writing this, ngl 

“We all have a purpose in this life,” she hid a sob. “I'm sorry… I've never been good at giving speeches… ”y/n said into the microphone as she glanced at the people who had come. They were in a church, they had already prayed and some had told stories. However, y/n thought she would have to speak for her grandfather. No matter how many tears she could shed, she needed to tell the story. "Pops ..." She cleared her throat, feeling like her voice was about to break. "My grandfather once told me that if I ran into someone, it was a miracle, a reason for being," she said with a little more security. “Everyone has a path and little by little we get together or we get separated, sometimes our paths go parallel and we don't know it until they cross,” She looked at Joanne to feel more confident. "There are roads that are destined to come together, then to get away, but in the end, they find their way back to each other" her eyes fixed on Tom. "My grandfather believed that his path was destined to come together, with my nana’s," She smiled, as a tear fell on the sheets of paper she was reading from. "Sometimes, I think so too, about him and my grandmother ..." she said as she closed her eyes. “I think there was no other couple more destined to be, and finally, they are together again. ” 

y/n sighed, watching the many faces that were accompanying her in her sorrow, in her pain, people who loved her grandfather. People who she was surprised they were there. She saw Jared, Marcus, Lex and even Claire. They all had that sad look upon their faces, with pity for her. Three years ago, she hadn’t been able to stand in that same place. She remembered it, how no words had come for her nana, just tears and tears full of despair, of pain. She hadn’t come to the point where she had by now. She was still suffering, but she knew that her pops had been aware of it. She had grown. And when Nana happened, Matty had happened too. 

And she saw some familiar faces who had been there, too, when Nana was gone. But, really, she hadn’t paid attention to them. She did now because they’re the ones who stay.

She saw new faces, too. She saw the other boys in the workshop and some boys she had seen at parties. It was no secret that her grandfather was loved. The good old Mr. James. Some, y/n supposed, were former students of his grandfather from his time teaching at the local high school.  y/n, for the first time, saw that his grandfather, despite his grandmother's death, had not been alone. 

"I think death is not ... something we should fear,” she cleared her throat. “My grandfather said it was the only thing we had for sure," y/n continued, as she bit her lip, her eyes locked on her mother. “That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt any less. It hurts for the one who stays, but it remains for us to honor his memory and live for them. He asked me to do that, to live a great life,” she sighed. 

Y/N smiled sadly and sweetly. “That’s what pops did, lived every day, as if it were the last. He wanted the sun to rise every day, and if it didn't, he enjoyed the rain, the cloudy day, ”she continued. "Sometimes, the days will be dark," she looked around, and then she saw Tom’s family, too. "He told me, you are in charge of giving them colour, of giving them light, with that little brush of yours he’d say, with which you always paint, the world is your canvas, Doodles," she smiled again. "He said that his brightest light was gone and that's why he was looking for her light in different things, like in that old blue Aston Martin, he always said that light is never gone, he told me, whenever you’re in a dark room, you just need a spark to lead your way, a single light and everything will become clearer, because when the night is the darkest, a single light will become the brightest," she sighed. "I guess, he went to look for her.” She said as she turned to see the old photograph of her grandparents. "His light… His moon,” she let out a soft, almost inaudible and dry chuckle. “He used to tell me a story when Joanne and I were little ..." She began, while Joanne approached her. Her sister squeezed her hand while the two saw the paper. 

“The moon and the sun,” y/n sentenced. “I think there is no better way to honor my grandfather than telling this story ... ”y/n said. She and Joanne saw each other before taking a deep breath, ready to read it. “I might just say, even though he was a teacher, he had a vivid imagination, and this might be mythologically incorrect but… So endearing to hear.” 

A quiet laugh was heard from the audience. 

"He’d start with… Rumor has it that two young lovers named Moon and Sun fell madly in love with each other," Joanne began to read the story. 

"Hera, in form of a star, goddess of marriage and birth, was jealous that a couple of mortals could love each other in such an intense way and went down from the Olympus, to prove that their romance was not true," y/n continued. 

“Expert in the power of seduction, shining brightly, the goddess tried to conquer the young man, but he vehemently rejected her by saying: ‘My lady, you are undoubtedly the most beautiful and sweetest woman there is, but my heart is only for my beloved moon. She is more desirable to me than gold itself, ”Joanne could barely read. 

“Furious for not being able to woo him, and jealous that her own relationship would never be as bright as theirs, the goddess sent the lovers apart from each other, forever. She turned the young man into the star that would illuminate the day and the woman would illuminate the night, so they would never coincide in the sky. She was sure that their love would be extinguished, ”y/n said, knowing the story by heart. Her eyes kept seeing Tom. 

“However, their love persevered, that of time and distance, They died each night and each morning so the other could breathe, they’d bathe  in the ocean and dry in the sky. Longing to be closer but always apart. And each time they were apart they’d make their most magnificent entrance painting a beautiful pink and orange canvas, or a sprinkled black one. They’d be art to the other. Aphrodite, goddess of love, was inspired, so she intervened so that the Sun could at least touch the face of his beloved again, and he told the Sun that whenever he wanted to see his beloved Moon he should try his best and then he could see the edge of his beloved's face. Since then in the days when the temperature is high, it is that the sun shines with all its intensity and you can see the silhouette of the Moon on the horizon because the Sun wants to look at its beloved Moon from afar.  ” Joanne finished. 

“And Aphrodite wanted them to touch, Aphrodite wanted them to become one with the other, when the two lovers merge back into one body, if only for a brief moment…to make the most beautiful art, we see it in the sky, a total eclipse of two hearts merging into one soul,” y/n let out a tear. “I want to believe now... that my grandparents are finally in their eclipse, I finally believe that this eclipse will be eternal,” said y/n. “The sun has risen up to his moon.” 

Some of them smiled, y/n’s mother shed a tear, and looked down. There were some other people saying their goodbyes, nothing like y/n’s. A few people approached her after the funeral. 

Tom was right by her side, all the time. Squeezing her arm if she ever needed assurance, and holding her hand if he saw her play with it. A lot of people said their condolences. Words that’d go into the void. Y/N was...calm. 

And not the type of calm she’d been at the beginning of the summer, which was calm confused with passiveness, and lack of energy and interest. No, she was truly in a sense of peace. 

After receiving the news, Tom had seen her, sinking to the ground to hug her sister. Y/N had told him that she was always the one to comfort Joanne, since they were children, so when it was time for Joanne to comfort her, she didn’t have a clue. And Tom had seen y/n, excusing herself from Joanne, saying she’d call their mother. But Tom had seen her walk out of the lighthouse to sob by herself. Haz told Tom to go and calm her, Tom knew better, to leave her alone. 

Tom was sad, too. But this was not his sorrow. He saw her doing it again, excusing herself from everyone. 

“Y/N, I’m sorry for your loss, your grandfather was fantastic.” 

“James would always brighten up my day.” 

“I’m very sorry.” 

“My condolences.” 

Words that were barely sticking to y/n. Tom just saw her smile to them, and hug her sister. Joanne was devastated. 

She walked into one of the halls of the church, it was dark, and nobody could see her. 

Tom followed after her this time. “Y/N?” He called out for her as she gulped down a sob. 

“Yeah?” She tried to clean up her tears with a blue handkerchief. Her pop’s handkerchief. “Sorry, I was just--” 

“It’s okay to cry, you know?” Tom walked over. 

Y/N sighed. “I know, I know… I just, I’ve been the girl who’s sad for so long, maybe right now, I just, need to be the strong one. For my mum, for Joanne.” 

Tom cupped her cheek, it was still dumped from her tears. “You said it yourself, you can let yourself be blue.” 

Y/N sighed. “It’s easy,” she sighed. “I guess what I’m trynna say is...I’m sad, but I’m okay, I’ll get through this. I meant what I said.” 

“The sun and the moon?” He asked. 

“Was it...bad?” 

“You once turned everything beautiful,” Tom assured her. “Your pops once told the story to me, that’s why he had a chain with a Sun around his neck, and … I assume that your nana wore the moon… Which one are you wearing around your neck?” 

Y/N smiled, just slightly as she pulled it out from under her shirt, the Sun. “Yes,” she gulped and licked her lips. Her eyes blurred down with tears. “I just-” And then her voice was breaking. “I just… I can’t help but feel guilty, I came over here to visit him and I… barely spent time with him because-” And she couldn’t finish her sentence before she was crying against Tom’s chest. 

Tom didn’t say anything, he knew it. With her, he should stay quiet, he should let her speak. 

Especially because Tom was feeling guilty. “This was not how the Summer was supposed to end,” she managed to say before catching her breath. 

He hugged her, because, it was all he could do. 

She cried, just for a bit longer. She was joined by her family then. 

And Tom knew he had to give her space. Because Tom knew that part of trying to mourn a death comes with guilt and comes with blaming other people. Tom believed he’d be blamed. But he also knew y/n was full of guilt because he hadn’t been on the surfing competition. Not that it mattered, but y/n had blamed her crying on that. Saying that he should continue with his life, that he needed to continue it. 

It made Tom think. Everything y/n had said. 

Especially about the sun, and the moon. How they were always apart from each other, how the moon wasn’t present sometimes. How sometimes, it faded out, leaving only a dark sky, with stars shining out. How each night the Sun had to die in order for the Moon to shine. And he knew that story by heart, because he had heard it about a million times, too. Whenever he was helping Pops with that blue Aston Martin. He’d always tell it. 

And y/n had told the short version. She didn’t tell everything the two lovers had to face once they were separated. 

How the Sun, due to Hera’s wishes and burning jealousy, was transformed into a god, so he’d be admired. And she turned the moon into the darkness, so everyone would avoid seeing her, and so no one could admire their beauty. Hera would say it, the moon’s hideous and should be feared. 

And everyone loved the Sun, how everyone wanted to warm up with him, and how it would bring life to their homes, inviting them to bathe in the ocean. The moon, instead, brought cold and uncertainty, making the ocean big and scary. 

And everyone enjoyed the presence of the sun, while people would hide for the moon. For a moment, the lovers forgot about each other, granting Hera’s wishes to separate them. And the moon missed her lover, and she just wanted to be seen. Just a fresh air in the midday sky. 

And Aphrodite had been a fan of their love, so he brought the moon to the middle of the day, where the Sun would see her, and only her. And it just took him a glance to remember everything, her embrace, and the way she shined even when everything was dark. And he fell in love with her again, with the parts that are seen and the parts which she hid. And the sun would shine a little less bright sometimes to see her up there, to let hear breath in the middle of the day. 

The Sun asked to touch her again, to feel her. Because they were once one, and know they were two whole parts of a heart, willing to skim with each other. And so their wish was granted, but Aphrodite’s power wasn’t as powerful, but their love was, and it’d grow stronger each time they were apart just making them both look forward to their next encounter. 

Tom liked that story, he had always wanted to have an epic story. Maybe he wasn’t the sun, or the moon, but maybe he was a star, shining over, that maybe was passed by, probably unnoticed. 

But y/n saw him. 

Like no one did. Like the bright, small star he was. But she saw him. 

So it was no surprise that he saw her, too. And he had gone to her, and he had taken her away, to the valley, to the shack, to the lighthouse. To places where y/n could be blue. And to places where he could bring her to his arms. Places where y/n didn’t have to play strong. 

A day came when he went in search for her, in one of those days when he knew she’d be feeling cold. It had been raining. The lights were reflected on the pavement from the water that was silking his path. 

Joanne had said she was gone. 

And Tom feared. Just a little. Because there was a part of him that though that maybe she had thought about it. That maybe she wasn’t strong enough. 

Maybe she had to let him go before the worse could happen. 

And he was having second thoughts about his big decision. Because going to London, meant having chemos, and getting chemos was trading his life for more years. That’s the way he saw it. Getting the life sucked out of him so he would get more chance to live. Talk about a contradiction. 

And Tom knew he didn’t have to pull out the cancer card, not now, not now that y/n was going through her sorrow. Which was incredibly calm. 

Because even when he took her to her freedom, she didn’t overreact, she never sobbed. She would be… quiet. 

And Tom was afraid. Because he remember what Joanne had told him a year before, how y/n wasn’t the one to drastically cry or yell, like Joanne did. No, y/n was… distant. Y/n, according to Joanne, is able to heal if she yells and cries and sobs. When she doesn’t, then, things are going down. 

And he was scared that it’d bring her to her doom. He remembered the quiet girl he had met, and how Tom wouldn’t be there to help her. 

That’s why he had to stay, for longer. As long as he could. 

That day, when she wasn’t home and she hadn’t told him where she’d gone, the first thing he did was stare into the garage. He confirmed it. 

The blue Aston Martin wasn’t there. But the Aston Martin wasn’t fully working, and with this rain? Y/n was probably stuck in a place.

Although, she hadn’t called anyone for help, he knew she was stubborn enough to not ask for it. 

Tom picked up some towels, and blankets and he knew he had to search for her. 

Maybe it would become a tradition, to look after the other in the rain. And the sky was so dark, so dark, he couldn’t see the sun or the moon. 

The only lights came from the lightning, and the only music he was hearing was the thunder clapping. The road was muddy, and not clear enough. 

He couldn’t find y/n. But he… had a certain feeling. So he went to the blue valley. 

And there, he saw her. Leaning against the old blue Aston Martin, letting the rain soak her down from head to toe. She had her arms crossed and was wearing a hoodie she had borrowed from Tom. 

She had been crying. Which was, a good sign, Tom knew. Y/N was letting it out. 

Tom approached her and pulled down the window. “Hello, lady, do you need any help?” He asked, as y/n looked up, with a small smile, as droplets of rain were pouring down her face. 

“Do you happen to know anything about cars, mister?” Y/N looked up as she approached to the window. Tom reached out to cup her face. 

“I do know I have one where you won’t get wet,” Tom laughed. “C’mon get in.” 

Y/N blinked as she stepped back. She laughed but then smirked. “Well, I wouldn’t be bragging about not getting a woman wet.”

Tom’s eyes widened. “What?” He couldn’t believe what he had just heard. He burst out in laughter. 

Y/N chuckled. “I don’t...I don’t know.” 

“And just so we’re… Clear, we haven’t had any trouble with that,” Tom winked at her. “Now get in the car.” 

She giggled as she shook her head. “Let me enjoy the rain.” 

Tom sighed. “Alright.” He parked right in front of her car and stepped out with her.

“Stop, you might get sick.”

Tom chuckled. “Can’t get any more sick,” he said as he walked over to her with open arms. 

She snuggled close to him. “Thank you.” 

He smiled. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like I am living my favorite bedtime story,” she confessed. 

“The sun and the moon?” Tom wondered. 

Y/N smiled. “Yeah, just...another version.”  

Tom raised his eyebrows. He kissed her forehead. “How long have you been here?” 

“A bit, I wasn’t planning on… the car stopping.” She chuckled. “But my phone ran out of battery and I…” 

Tom smiled. 

“And I decided I might as well enjoy the rain.” 

“Why did you take the Aston Martin? You knew it wasn’t ready,” Tom pushed. 

“I guess, because I thought it’d give me answers,” she shrugged. “I realized, I don’t even know the questions.” 

The rain was silking their clothes as they stayed hugging each other. Y/N felt Tom rubbing her back, as the riveting rattling from the raindrops were harmonizing to them. 

“Besides,” she looked up at him. “Maybe I was hoping a surfer would rescue me again from a car malfunction.” 

He chuckled. “You were so annoyed to see me that one time.” 

“I was.” 

Tom frowned. “Angel!” 

She laughed. “I didn’t like you! I can’t lie about that,” she admitted. 

He lifted her chin and placed a soft peck on her lips. 

“Weird thing, because I felt like I loved you even before I met you,” Tom declared. She grinned. 

“How wonderful life is, now you’re in my world,” she whispered as she connected her lips with his. 

Tom rested his forehead against hers. 

She smiled. “You know… The car might not work… But the radio does,” she grinned. “Would you dance in the rain with me?” 

Tom grinned. “Really?” 

She chuckled as she reached inside the old Aston Martin. 

“I don’t know what will play, though,” she admitted. “It...is…let me see if I can work it out.” 

Tom laughed watching her. “Need any help?” 

She tried pressing the buttons, and a loud scratch was heard. Tom laughed. 

But then a few notes playing on a piano were heard. Y/N smiled and chuckled to herself sadly. The biggest irony, or coincidence, or… magic.

Tom felt his heart warm up as soon as he heard the piano notes and listened to the familiar tune.

Love Me Tender. Elvis Presley.the first song they’d ever danced to. 

Y/N felt a tear falling down her cheek, Tom was quick to wipe it. Y/N got out of the car again as she took Tom’s hand in hers. 

He pulled her closer. 

“You know, for someone who told me he didn’t dance. You sure have been dancing a lot with me,” she chuckled, as he wrapped his arms around her, letting the song move them. 

“And for someone who claims not to like me you sure have been proving me wrong,” he grinned. 

She blushed. 

“Things have changed, this summer was more than I could ask for,” she admitted. “But the summer is over now.” 

Tom hugged her closely. “The summer is over.” 

“Is this a goodbye?” She asked with fear. It felt like suddenly asking made the rain turn into snow. They turned cold and suffocated. 

Tom shook his head. “It’s—it’s a new beginning.” 

They sang under their breath. “Love me tender, love me true. All my dreams fulfil. For my darling, I love you, and I always will.” 

They danced along under the rain as the song played in the background, merging with the raindrops and just accentuated by the thunder. It seemed like the melody was prettier under the rain, it sounded more natural. 

And though the skies were grey and the dirt was brown, they were seeing light surrounding them. 

They grinned and clumsily danced, feeling their bodies against the other. Knowing there would never be twice a love like theirs, not ever.

The song finished and they shared a single kiss, under the rain. 

They got into the old Aston Martin. They needed to stay quiet, for a bit, take at the moment. Because maybe they hadn’t realized it until then. But the summer was over. The summer was coming to an end and they didn’t have anything planned. 

“The summer went by fast,” she whispered. 

Sure, Tom has said he’d go to London. Easier said than done. There needed to be planning and there needed to be love. But there was barely any time, and Tom didn’t know if he needed to continue with it. 

He needed to sort out everything. Especially, because he was feeling so… selfish. Because right now, it was the summer ending, but later? How could he know about the future? There was no easy way to say it, the possibilities of him staying were ceasing. 

Tom gulped. “Can you… can you turn on the heating?” He asked her. 

“Oh shoot, right, sorry…” She gulped, as she tried to start the car. 

“Don’t you wanna head home?” He asked her. 

She shook her head. “No, I don’t… I… I need to get this back running.” A sudden sense of urgency got into y/n who tried to re-start the car several times, she was breathing quickly. She was not listening to Tom. 

“Y/N, it can’t be fixed, not right now! Not with this rain, look tomorrow… I’ll bring down a truck and take it to the shop.” 

“No, no, I need to fix it, it can’t be… broken forever,” she cried. She got off the car as the rain was getting worse and worse. She was muttering to herself, that she needed to get it done. 

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N!” Tom was behind her. “Angel, love, c’mon.” 

“The car… I need to… I need to get it back running, I was so… distracted with dancing that I forgot I was trying to get it back on, I was supposed to get it back running but I--” She started to shake as she was talking and mumbling to herself. She had opened the bonnet and just stared at everything. She had closed it and opened it several times. 

“Tom... I need to fix this,” she sobbed. “The car… I was… I shouldn’t get distracted, I…” 

And Tom understood why the sudden urge to repair the car, this wasn’t about the car. He took her in his arms. 

“Y/N, angel, calm down,” he mumbled into her ear. “Angel, angel.” 

But she didn’t hug him back, she fell to the ground instead, desperately sobbing, while Tom could do nothing but hold her tight. Although he wasn’t feeling well, and the rain was getting much worse by the moment. 

Tom couldn’t make this about him, y/n needed him. But he hadn’t been feeling well. Not since the morning. And before he knew it, he was falling down to the mud. 

Next thing he knew, he woke up to yelling. He barely opened his eyes but he saw them. Y/N and his mother. 

“What were you thinking? He can’t be in the rain!” She said. “It’s your fault he’s here… He was doing fine, and everything he’s done lately circles around you!” 

Y/N stepped back, “I’m...I’m very sorry.”

“Mum, no,” Harry stepped in. “She’s been of great help! She got Tom to go back on therapy!” 

Nikki closed her eyes. “But Tom’s lost his mind, everything he does is stupid and pathetic and she keeps on making him do all these stunts!” 

Y/N looked away. 

“He climbed a Ferris wheel! He risked his life,” Nikki was being irrational. Tom watched them, knowing better. He knew his mother didn’t mean all of that, but that was the reaction they’d get whenever Tom got into trouble. You can’t blame her, the woman’s desperate. Her son is ill. Her son is dying. And she had grown fond of y/n but there were many things she disapproved of their relationship, mostly including things which Nikki found inappropriate for a kid with cancer to do. 

“I’m very sorry,” y/n said again. “Mrs Holland I… I’m very sorry.” 

“It’s alright, dear, he’s fine,” Dom intruded. Nikki glared at her husband. “He’s fine,” he assured her. “I just talked to the nurse, he just needs rest, he’s dehydrated, nothing with his vitals, he’s fine. They’ll just keep him at bedrest tonight in to check him in.” 

Y/N looked down. “I’m really sorry.” 

Tom saw her leave and frowned. Harry sighed as he followed after her. 

“I’ll… I need to talk to Dr. Green.” Dom said before walking off. 

Nikki frowned and then turned into the room, seeing Tom was awake. “Oh, thank god!” She said as she rushed to him to take his hand. “You’re so cold--” 

“Mum-” 

“You shouldn’t be out there--” 

“Mum, I know!” 

Nikki stepped back. 

“I’m fine.” 

“You’re not, I saw you this morning, you looked pale.” 

Tom looked away. “Yes, yes I know, but it was my fault, not y/n’s, okay?” He looked her in the eyes. “Y/N is not the one who’s put me in this, mother, alright? Neither are you.” 

“But if only you hadn’t been in the rain-” 

“You heard dad, it’s not the rain, I was dehydrated, that’s on me, okay?” Tom closed his eyes. “I try to ignore it okay? Yes, I knew I was feeling bad… But I simply ignored it. Because it had to be about y/n, because all summer has been about me! It’s always her worrying, and it’s always her making me feel normal, it’s always her trying to make me forget, and I can’t-... I can’t keep on shielding her from being normal herself, alright? ” 

Nikki blinked. 

“This had nothing to do with the rain, and I’m sorry mum, but today, it had to be about her, because she has to act tough with all of this, and I… I saw her, she feels guilty, because she was supposed to spend time with her grandpa and all she did in the summer was take care of me.” 

Nikki took his hand in his. “I’m--” 

“I love her, mum, and she’s made me see things I hadn’t before, alright?” Tom continued. “And I know I’ve done some pretty stupid stuff for her, but I… I’ve also realized many things.” 

Nikki sighed. 

“I’m sorry--” 

“I know, I know it’s hard mum…. But, don’t blame it on her, especially not now.” 

Nikki gulped down her guilt. She had snapped at y/n without any reason, honestly. She knew that. And Tom knew it. It was the biggest side-effect his illness had brought. His calm and loving mother losing her senses. This hadn’t been the first time they had their differences shown. It seemed like both of them had a very different approach to Tom’s illness. 

“I’m just trying to protect you,” Nikki said. 

“And…dad too, and Harry, and Sam, even Jared” Tom sighed. “You know, everyone has a saying on what I should feel like, on what I should do, but no one understands it, because none of you...You all forgot about it, didn’t you?” 

“Forget what?” 

“I forgot it, too. That I’m still Tom.” Tom pushed. “She made me remember.”

“I never forgot…” 

“No, ma, but you did,” Tom sighed. “I… I feel like my life changed, everyone turned to see me, I suddenly became someone always watched and every one pitied me, and… Then she came around, and she made me realize I’m more than pills, I’m more than this.” 

“You’ve always been, Tom,” Nikki assured him. 

“But… for a while, ma, I hadn’t felt it, I hadn’t felt alive, I was just… a dead man living,” he explained. “And suddenly she came, with that sketchbook of hers and that paintbrush and she just… Painted me, she painted back the colour on me.”

Nikki smiled. 

“Yes, I know I’ve done some pretty stupid things, but… I realized I should, because I’m young, alright? I should be doing that kind of stuff, I should be dancing with her in the rain, and I should continue to climb on Ferris Wheels, burst into songs and for a moment… Forget about this, alright?” 

“I’m… going to apologize to her.” Nikki stood up as she looked around the room, she picked up some blankets. 

She went through the halls that she knew by heart, already. She had been harsh. She had let it all overcome it, because everything had grown. But to be fair, her nerves were constantly on a spike. Just waiting for the worst. Always living a nightmare. Hiding from everyone so no one could see her tears. 

She went to the cafeteria, ordered two coffees. Nikki feared y/n had left. But for her surprise, she hadn’t. She was at that old blue waiting room with her clothes still soaking. Her head was on her hands. 

“I have to apologize to you,” Nikki said as she handed her a coffee and covered her with the blanket.

“No, I get it, it’s my fault, I’m very sorry” Y/N said with tears on her face. 

“No, no I shouldn’t have snapped at you,” Nikki side hugged her. “You’ve only helped Tom.” 

“I… I sorry, I forgot he shouldn’t be in the rain today, I just…” She gulped. “I was… I was…” 

“You were making my son feel alive,” Nikki admitted. “And that’s what you’ve been doing all summer. You meant well and I guess… I haven’t been fair on you, your grandpa just passed, I should have--” 

“No, it’s alright, really, I get it,” Y/N gulped. “It’s difficult to remain calm. I didn’t today.” 

“What happened then?” Nikki turned to her.

“I actually couldn’t… I guess the same thing that happened with you, denial, trying to blame it on someone else,” Y/N confessed. “That’s when it happened, I… I was so distracted again that I didn’t see Tom wasn’t feeling well.” 

“It’s not your fault,” Nikki told her.

“I don’t know… I think Tom and I were very irresponsible this summer,” y/n pointed out as she took a sip from her coffee.

Nikki shook her head. “No, you’ve been young” 

Y/N gulped as she shrugged. “I guess we were both trying to forget our life, I tried to forget the reason why I came here because I didn’t want to accept it.��� 

Nikki waited for her to continue. 

“I was the only one who knew that pops was sick… And I used to snap that way before, because I tried to avoid it. I tried to forget about it, but, it can’t be ignored for much, we were supposed to see pops all summer because we knew that day would come,” y/n conffessed. 

“I’m sorry.”

“But I guess I thought that if I tried to forget it, it wouldn’t happen…If I avoided it, it would… fade out?” Y/N sighed shaking her head. “And I think that’s what Tom’s been doing, forget about it.” 

Tom’s mother sat back, realizing how well this stranger knew her son. How could she not see it? How had she been blind all this time? 

“But it can’t go away.” 

“No, it can’t,” Y/N agreed. 

“That doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be happy, that shouldn’t mean he is not Tom anymore,” Nikki sighed. 

“Your son will never stop being him,” y/n said. “He’s a fighter,” she continued taking Nikki’s hand in hers. “And he’s just like sunlight, warming up everyone.” 

Nikki smiled. “He is.” 

“And he will keep on fighting,” y/n assured him. “And I want to be with him, I want to help him fight.”

“He doesn’t want to keep fighting,” Nikki sighed. “I’ve tried-” 

“He’s going to London, Nikki,” y/n sentenced. “He promised me.” 

Nikki’s eyes widened as she looked at her. “What?” 

“He’s the sun, and he will keep on shining.” 

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[mother-snake]

the grims wish

(the next series im writting!!! and its got a first chapter! also should i bring my oc’s into this??) tags: @idkanameatall

next: n/a warnings: swaring

- janus is a magician. he has been since he was nine. and recently, things have been changing... its up to him and several others to fix whats gone wrong

Chapter 1- it was a stormy day

there were once skies filled with wonderful things. Birds, bugs, planes and clouds. the earth had people walking the streets getting to work. Some would ride bikes and others drive via car, bus or taxi. the planet filled with beautiful stones and flourished green everywhere.

Now things were changing. Ever since the lunar eclipse almost 100 years ago now. Things changed. the eclipse lasted for an entire day, and when it had stopped… two suns were in the sky. One shining bright and the other barely duller.

The people of the planet changed. Some could transform into wild animals; others couldn’t walk in the light. Some could manipulate the elements with spells. very few people had changed however. Most people stayed the same. And that meant the fear of the unknown would resurface. Those who had changed learned to adapt to the less forgiving.

Some would band together and try and find a place to fit in. some did, others couldn’t. starving of hunger or dying from the harsh winters.

I was one of the less fortunate. After I had turned 18 id been kicked out of my home with sunny by my side. sunny was my familiar. Looking like a boa constrictor but almost ghostly. You could see through her yellow shinny body. But her black eyes could pierce through your own skin.

Right now, she was wrapped around me like a thick warm scarf. Trying her best to provide me some warmth as the rain thundered down onto the ground. I was already soaked to the bone and an icy feeling had already set into my bones.

I looked around the streets, vision being blurred by the rain that poured relentlessly.

I pushed myself of the ground where I sat. there was no place open for me to sit in. and if there was, they didn’t take too kindly to magicians. that’s what I hated about coming back here. but there wasn’t anywhere else to travel to.

I grumbled as my hood fell down. Exposing my already wet hair to the rain. At least with it up I could contain some warmth. I didn’t bother to put it back up. there was no point in doing so.

I let out a huff. My feet made barely any noise as I made my way down the street. If there was one place, I could go it was the train station. But even then, I was cutting it close.

A loud bark cut me out of my thoughts as I felt something grab the hood of my jacket and tug me backwards as a car raced in front of my vision.

Whatever was holding onto me let go and I swivelled on my heel to face it. my eyes locked onto a black dog. It stood up to my height. Its glowing indigo eyes alerted me to the fact it wasn’t human. it glanced to my neck and looked curiously at my familiar.

“thanksss,” sunny hissed to the dog who barked back in response.

It nodded to me and soon a bright blue light swarmed where it stood. Shifting to the form of a human. A tall one at that. “sorry for the scare,” they said.

He wore a black suit. A blue stripped tie matched his animal’s eyes. a black umbrella was raised in the air, protecting him from the rain. A small part of me was jealous. Another part slightly ready to turn tail and run.

“come, we should get out of the rain, I have a feeling it won’t let up any time soon,” he said as he held out a hand. sunny turned her head to look at me and gave a small nod. Well if she could trust him. So could I.

I took his hand and was pulled under the umbrella. It wasn’t much. but it was nice to not have rain pouring over me. we walked silently next to each other. Not saying a single word. I hunched myself over. My overgrown hair covering the left side of my face. something I was thankful he couldn’t see.

“so,” he said, “may I ask for your name?” “Janus, and you?” “Logan berry. It’s a pleasure Janus,” he said loudly, trying to talk over the rai.

We turned a corner. I chuckled as I realised the school I’d gone to so long ago was still around. It was by no means small. It stood proudly in the storm. A small part of me felt my spine shiver. As if something from inside was looking into my soul.

Then before I knew it was out of vision.

 It was around ten minuets later that we arrived to a very posh looking set of apartments. Definitely not new. I recognised them.

Soon we were inside one. A deep red door with the numbers 24 plastered on neatly. Logan opened the door and ushered me inside. It was a lot different than I had imagined. The entrance hall had several doors lined up on either side. A couple were open.

“hey Logan its good to-“ a voice called. the figure at the end of the hall stood stunned upon seeing me, his eyes going wide upon seeing sunny. “oh my, Logan can you grab a towel for the poor soul?” he said.

Logan gave a sharp nod before patting my arm as if saying ‘good luck’. I let a weak smile on my face as I made my way forwards as he ushered me further in. warmth seeped into my bones. Something I had been very thankful for. Almost relaxing as it hit my skin. sunny let out a content hiss as well. I’m not really sure if it was because she was warm or if it was because she knew I was. a mini mother snake is what she was… and I was perfectly fine with that.

“my names Patton, you’re more than welcome to stay here to wait out the storm he said as he ruffled my wet hair. he let out a chuckle, making his way out of view.

Thankfully Logan chose that moment to walk in. a towel in hand and some other things. “I brought you a change of clothes, I have a feeling those cant be very comfortable nor hygienic right now,” he said, “the bathroom is down the hall. Second door to the right.

I stood there stunned. My mind seemingly frozen. “I think you broke my human,” sunny hissed over to Logan as she looked at me with a smirk.

“I never asked for your name, my apologies,” Logan said as he rubbed the back of his neck. “sssummer, but my human callsss me sssunny,” she said.

I shook my head, snapping out of my thoughts, “are you certain? I don’t want to intrude,” I muttered. “it’s quite all right Janus. I know what its like being out there. To be honest you look like you need a place to stay for tonight. So, might as well get comfy.”

I nodded and made my way to the bathroom. so…Patton and Logan hu? Were they now my friends?

I’m not surprised at Logan knowing what its like to be on the streets for so long. He looked at least two years older than me. His skin was a pale white, black ebony hair seemed to contrast his skin. and sky-blue eyes that could melt the iciest of hearts.

A small flush of the cheeks was all it took for me to take the things he was holding and make my way into the hall. the bathroom hadn’t been hard to miss. Going in had made me chuckle. Several shelves on the walls held rubber ducks. Multi coloured and wearing clothing of famous figures.

I couldn’t resist the smile that slipped onto my face.

 I was out of the room within five minutes. My hair was still slightly damp, but at least not dripping onto my back.  I pulled it back into a ponytail. But kept the left half covered by my hair.

I took a deep breath. All my damp clothes were shoved into my previously empty backpack. I picked it up and opened the door. Laughter rung in my ears. But it was familiar. One I hadn’t heard in years.

I could feel both mine and sunny’s excitement flooding us all at once. I made my way forwards and peaked my hear around the corner and let a grin cover my face.

“ah! There you are kiddo,” Patton said excitedly, grabbing my hand and dragging me in.

“holy shit,” moustache said, “dude, how the fuck are you still alive?!” the strangers in the room seemed startled for a couple seconds. “Remus, I haven’t an idea,” I said as we brought each other into a hug.

“seven fucking years Jannie. Seven fucking years,” he muttered as he held on tighter. “eh, could’ve been longer,” I looked over Remus’s shoulder to see his gobsmacked twin, “hello roman.”

“wait, you two know Janus?” Patton said stunned “hell yeah!” Remus exclaimed, “we went to the same school.”

“well anyways, have time to talk,” Patton said, “dinners in the oven and id like to get to know our guest,”

And that’s how the evening went. I answered their questions. Mainly the twins spitting them out rapid fire. there were plenty of laughs as I told them about everywhere id been. They had seemed genuinely surprised that I had been everywhere it seemed. With the limits of being in the uk, it was much easier to travel around than if I were to be in America. I would most likely still be roaming thinking about it.

 Time passed quicker than I’d realised. Soon the rain had stopped pouring from the sky. Instead replaced by an inky black sky. Clouds seemed to cover the sky as I looked out the window.

Sunny shimmered back into view from her invisible cloaking on the window ledge. “he hassn’t changed, hasss he?” she hissed out. “ha, indeed,” I muttered back, letting out a yawn.

There was a knock on the main door. I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard someone open the door and slam it behind themselves. “hey guys!” oh god… this wouldn’t go down well… “hey Virgil, we have a guest for today so be polite okay,” Patton called out.

When Virgil entered the Livingroom, basically commons for them. He froze as he saw me sitting by the window. “oh for fuck’s sake, why are you here?” he groaned. “trust me, ill be out of your hair soon enough Virgil. I promise,” I sighed, “I already feel like I’m intruding.”

He gave me a pat on the back and reached into his pocket, pulling out a small clip. he reached up to my face and pulled my hair out of my face, clipping it back with a spider hairclip. “you will have shitty vision if you keep covering that side you know?

I sighed, there was no point on letting my hair fall back into place. From memory Virgil seemed to have hair and bobby pins all over himself. There was no hiding from the onslaught of hair accessories.

“so… what you been doing these past three years then?” he asked nervously.

I chuckled and began to recount all I’d previously told the others. it had been a while since he had felt welcome anywhere. And here in this small pack of monsters and humans… he hadn’t felt at home ever more than now.

[keelywolfe]

FIC: The Elephant in the Room ch.1 (baon)

Summary: Jeff has started working at the Embassy. He's got a new job, a new car, and a new place to live. Now if only the rest of his life could fall into order, that'd be great. Any time now...any time at all...

Tags: Spicyhoney, Kustard, Established Relationships, Prejudice Against Monsters, Angst,  Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Past Suicidal Thoughts,  Mental Health Issues, Friendship

Notes: Don’t skip the tags, okay? Not wanting to trigger anyone. 

Part of the ‘by any other name’ series.

~~*~~

Read it on AO3

or

Read it here!

~~*~~

If someone on the street had told Jeff a year ago that not only would he be working at the Monster Embassy, but he’d be living in New New Home with a Monster as a roommate and helping out his best friend (who was also a Monster and only called him Andy) on the weekends with weird experiments to entertain the local kids, well. Truthfully, if anyone had tried to tell him that fortune on the corner of Euclid Avenue, Jeff probably would have walked a little faster and hopped on the next bus.

Weird to think it was only a little over year ago. Not that they’d gone out for an anniversary dinner or anything. That would’ve been weird, yeesh, opening up some champagne to celebrate their ‘didn’t let someone kill you’ moment. Come to think of it, it was probably a good thing no one brought it up because that seemed like exactly the kind of thing Stretch would celebrate, complete with paper hats and balloons. Maybe next year they could celebrate getting arrested together, instead.

For today though, Jeff was on a mission.

He’d spent the morning at the Embassy with Cathryn, one of his co-workers in Public Relations, a short, plump Monster who distinctly resembled a cat. So far, everyone was very nice, and if Cathryn was a little giggly and a lot gossipy, she was also very good at her job. A knack for information gathering was not necessarily a bad thing in this department.

This afternoon he was supposed to be heading to ‘Classic Books’ to wrap up everything with Thomas. He’d already be on his way except Stretch was supposed to be coming with him and he was currently late. Not that it was his fault; Stretch had suggested they meet in the middle at the Beanery instead of Jeff driving all the way back to New New Home and it looked like the bus was running behind.

Not that Jeff would have minded making the drive. His new little car ran like a dream and if he still felt a little guilty having it, he soothed it with the knowledge that he was going to work his ass off at the Embassy to make up for it. It’d been a long time since he’d driven much and he’d never owned a car of his own. But there was something freeing about having a car; no waiting for buses that only went to certain areas and left him to walk through the heat or the cold, slushy mornings.

Or ran late.

He could go out whatever the time was without worrying about making the last bus, down the roads of Ebott and to the Embassy. Which, okay, was pretty much as far as he’d driven so far, today would be his first trip downtown and he was impatient to get on it.

Eh, it was all right, though. He was pretty sure it was less the time saving and more the coffee behind Stretch’s suggestion. There were already two cups sitting in the drink holders, still too hot to drink, but that was fine. This time, he was the one who got to buy the coffee and Stretch wasn’t here to stop him. That was how friendship was supposed to be, give and take, fighting over the check and actually being able to pay it. This time, Jeff was playing to win, and Stretch was going to have to deal.

Thinking of which, the bus pulled up just then, and people streamed off, Humans and Monsters alike headed for the Beanery. Stretch was about a head above everyone else, clambering down the stairs on the bus, almost tripping as he tried to pull out his headphones at the same time. From the sidewalk, he looked around briefly, brightening as he caught sight of Jeff. He waved across the parking lot and then he was suddenly there, right next to the car and hopping into the passenger side. Jeff had seen that trick about a hundred times now and it was still startling. He wondered what other Humans thought when they saw it, wondered if the PR department worried over it.

“hey, handy andy!” Stretch said cheerily, sliding into the seat. He only made it about halfway, grimaced immediately and reaching down for the lever to push the seat back as far as it could go. It was enough for him to settle his legs so they weren’t crammed into the dashboard, even if it almost put him in the backseat.

“Sorry,” Jeff chuckled, “no one else has ridden with me yet.” The seat probably wouldn’t get moved too much again, come to think of it, almost everyone Jeff knew was well over six feet tall. Then again, Blue, Sans, and Red would all be lying if they tried to claim they topped the ruler at five feet, so depending on who needed a ride, it might get quite a workout.

“it’s all good,” Stretch said dismissively. His eye lights landed on the coffee cups and lit up, “ooh, sacrificial beverages, whatcha get me?”

Jeff tapped one of the cups with a finger, “Pumpkin spice latte with an extra shot and sprinkles. I know that’s not quite up to your usual standards, but I didn't want to chance being creative. Only took Debbie like thirty seconds to make.”

“of course it did,” Stretch scoffed, “she’s a professional.” He snatched up the cup greedily and took a deep swallow, heedlessly of the steam still pouring out of the little drinking hole. Honestly, being able to eat or drink something no matter how hot was a damned handy trick, a seriously underestimated superpower. Jeff had already burned his tongue on his first sip.

He left Stretch to savor his rich caffeination and started the car. But before he pulled away, he glanced automatically to make sure Stretch had his seat belt on. Edge was infecting him with his protectiveness, and he trusted Stretch, but he’d promised. From the way Stretch rolled his eye lights, he caught the look, but he didn’t say anything, only moved his arms pointedly so Jeff could see the strap across his chest.

Good enough.

The noontime traffic wasn’t too bad and Jeff guided them through it carefully, not quite confident enough in his driving skills to relax completely, especially with a passenger. Not that Stretch seemed very worried, he only chatted about his week between sips of coffee, and Jeff couldn’t help laughing as he heard about Edge’s chicken rescue mission.

“…i mean, seriously, a chicken and about six kids, all following behind him like some kind of demented conga line,” Stretch laughed. “edge in the lead and you know i love him, but he always looks so serious, i swear, sometimes i think he’s afraid he’ll give himself another crack if he smiles in public. so there he is, leading them straight-faced as an accountant and nugget is on his heels like a lovesick idiot. me, i have to bribe them with food to get them to come with me anywhere and they’d follow edge into a kfc.”

Jeff laughed too, imagining Edge solemnly leading a chicken along the street. “Wish I could’ve seen that.”

“yeah, i never have my damn phone on me when he decides to get up to the chucklefucks. pretty sure it’s a conspiracy.” He took a long sip of his coffee and Jeff took advantage of the pause to ask a question of his own.

“How did your visit with Alphys go?” He’d already known about it from Blue, but to his surprise, so did Cathryn. Gossip about Stretch was prime material for the Public Relations department, which was a little unnerving until Catty pointed out that whether he liked it or not, Stretch was an unofficial symbol of Monsterkind. His Twitter following was massive as was his Instagram, and he’d been in the news several times now over attacks on Monsters. If his health problems ever went public, it would be plastered across the internet. The P.R. department needed to be ready if that ever happened to handle any fallout.

Knowing that made Jeff a little uncomfortable and that was a conversation he wanted to have with Edge. He wasn’t about to allow his friendship with Stretch to be used in any capacity and he wanted that to be clear from the start.

Stretch scowled at the question, hunching down in his seat. “fine.” That was a pretty firm hint that he didn’t want to talk about it, but to Jeff’s surprise, he went on with an impressive amount of disgust, “she thinks i should quit smoking.”

“Really? Why?" Jeff had always been under the assumption that cigarettes didn’t really have much of an effect on skeleton Monsters, unless—he involuntarily glanced at Stretch’s midsection, hidden beneath his baggy sweatshirt.

Stretch paused with his coffee cup halfway to his mouth, staring at him with narrowed sockets, then burst out laughing. "holy shit, no! you knucklehead, i'm not pregnant!"

Jeff cringed down over the steering wheel. Well, that was a year’s worth of embarrassment all dumped out at once. “Fuck, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have even thought that.”

"it's okay," Stretch was still snickering. "i get it, it's a little confusing for humans. not all monsters have kiddos in what you guys would consider a traditional way. just for reference though, nope, can't get pregnant, my anatomy don't work that way. neither does edge’s fyi, so you can skip picturing him in a maternity getup. can’t wait to tell him you think he’s enough of a stud to knock me up.” He grimaced then, a shadow eclipsing his humor. “actually, never mind that. let’s keep it between us.”

“Okay.” Every time Jeff got answers from Stretch, he ended up with a basketful of more questions. “Can I ask you something personal?”

“more personal than checking if i’m preggers?” Stretch grinned, “i’ve never stopped you before.”

“Why don’t you work at the Embassy?” Stretch blinked slowly, his good humor visibly fading, and Jeff hastily added, “I mean, everyone else in your family does, even Red. I only wondered, it’s not a big deal if you—"

“eh, not really my thing,” Stretch said carelessly. He shifted to look out the window, his fingers absently peeling away the cardboard sleeve around his cup in long ribbons. “they do good stuff but i…” Stretch trailed away and ducked his head, swallowing hard, and that casual façade faltered. For a moment, there was nothing but the radio, playing a soft counterpoint of incongruous pop music as Stretch spoke again, strangled and low, “because when we first got here i was teetering on the edge of suicide. took a while to get past that and once i decided jumping off a bridge wasn’t for me, well. didn’t really feel like starting a nine to five.” Stretch shrugged. “the place i came from wasn’t so great.”

Jeff swallowed hard against the knot of emotion that settle into his throat, the taste in his mouth like metal shavings. He knew Stretch had some issues; he’d told Jeff himself that he had PTSD, but not why. It was probably shitty the way he managed to keep bringing it up, but somehow, he couldn’t feel too bad about it. That Stretch had been honest with him meant something and maybe he wasn’t sure exactly what, but it was about being friends. That much he knew.

Stretch abandoned his mutilated coffee cup in the drink holder and let his hand drop on to his knee, the skinny bones clenched into a fist. Jeff hesitated, wavering, then finally reached over and touched the back of it lightly. Immediately, Stretch turned his hand over, his fingers closing over Jeff’s tightly. They pinched a little, unforgiving bone against his fleshy fingers and Jeff didn’t care, only held on tight as he asked quietly, “You mean under the mountain?”

“that, too,” Stretch agreed. His other knee was bouncing, agitated energy spilling out, and Stretch let out a shaky sigh, his grip forcibly relaxing. “anyway, i still have some issues,” he laughed again, sharper, “issues, back issues, microfiche, i’ve got the works. took a while for me to even be able to go to the embassy if you want to know the truth.”

“Why?”

“the labs. had some bad times in another lab. i’m getting past it, doing all the good chitty-chat with my therapist, but i still don’t want to work in one full time. my own little setup is enough.” His smile was still a little weak. “guess i’m meant to be a homebody. good thing edge doesn’t mind.”

“Why would he?” Jeff teased, lightly, “he’s got the good end of the deal, he gets to come home to you!”

Stretch’s next laugh was more honest. “thanks, andy.”

“No problem,” Jeff said. He had more questions, always more, and what did this have to do with Stretch's issues with cats? Whatever it was, Jeff was letting it go for now. They'd probed deep enough into the back issues of Stretch's mind for the moment. Stretch promised him once that eventually he'd explain everything and Jeff believed him. One of the first things he'd ever learned about Stretch was that he kept his word and if he needed time to do it, Jeff would let him have all he needed.

He let Stretch keep his hand until he was ready to let it go and when he did, instead of shaking away the ache, Jeff picked up his own coffee. It was only lukewarm at this point but that was fine. Pumpkin spice lattes tasted pretty good any which way you drank them.

~~*~~

tbc

[crystalsexarch]

Things You Keep to Yourself - G’raha Tia - E

Pre-ARR. Pre-everything. G'raha Tia was a scholar first and foremost, and a rather precocious one at that. Thus, his fellow student (and future WoL?) comes to give him hell (and maybe something else?) for being so darn responsible.

Tags and more writing available here.

The deliberate, slow footsteps that had carried down the halls stopped just at Raha’s doorway. And since the only person the young scholar expected a visit from that afternoon was not like to have good intentions, he kept his head down even as his ears pricked forward. If he were to properly fulfill his advisory responsibilities, he needed to organize his borrowed work space before taking time to fraternize with a certain Keeper of the Moon.

But that Keeper would not relent in his presence. Practically looming over the desk, Raha tried to concentrate on his search instead of the figure in the door. Where is that damn key? he thought. How can I evaluate work I can’t even access?

After turning over the same stacks, looking under the same arcane-objects-turned-paperweights, Raha realized he’d never be able to work with that man’s beady little eyes upon him. He looked up.

“So. It’s come to this,” Bas’ir Bahani said from his casual position against the door jamb. From side to side his tail swayed, belying the tricky scowl on his face. He was about the same height as Raha, made taller only by the formal shoes he wore, but slighter of frame, paler and with dark blue hair - something he was rumored throughout the halls of academia to spend hours maintaining. That rumor, Raha knew to be true.

“Come to what, exactly?” Raha asked.

“The teacher’s pet has become the teacher.” His eyebrows danced high with a wave of his hand. Despite the temperate climate, Bas’ir wore a scarf (indoors, no less) and a long-sleeved turtleneck (in the summer). “And you’re leaving your good friend behind.”

“Which one, exactly?”

“What do you expect them to call you? Professor Tia?”

Raha scrunched his nose and went back to searching the desk. Everything he needed sat in a locked drawer, if he could just find the key he hadn’t thought to ask for earlier. “I tire of your willful ignorance.”

“You think you’re better than I am just because you’ve got an office and a desk now, hmm? Your own little place to - “

“Please.” Raha set his palms on the edge and leaned forward, eyes dark. With sunlight filtering in from the window at his back, he fancied his muscles may actually have looked a bit impressive...not that that had anything to do with his choice of accommodations. Sure, a fair few elder scholars had offered him their offices, but it was pure coincidence he had chosen the one with natural lighting. “If I think any less of you, consider that your own doing.”

A few moments passed in which Bas’ir stood, blinked, considered how seriously he should take this handsome, wholesome man...and finally rolled his eyes. “My, how tough you must think you look with your archer’s arms. If you spent half as much time studying as you do flexing before your mirror, I bet they’d have given you a bigger desk.”

One hefty sigh later, Raha decided to abandon his search and recline. The chair smelled like dust and was far too big for him, but at least he’d been able to adjust the height so his feet could touch the ground. “You know it’s not really my office, yes?”

Bas’ir uncrossed his arms and approached with a pace far slower than his tongue. “Sure.” When he reached the desk, he slid his finger over the dark grooves in the wood and thought of home...then rubbed the thought off on his scarf.

“They’re just letting me use it when I - “

“Yes,” he said. “But you’re the one sitting in the chair now. So would you like to make use of it?” His lips curled over his fangs. How delightful he found Raha ‘s inability to keep his back straight at that, his cheeks un-reddened.

“Is this not...how you use chairs, Bas’ir?” He rubbed his forehead. “You must be aware: this is why they offered me the position.”

“I think you have the right to break it in, make it your own.” He knocked his fist on the wood and cocked his head at the sound. “This is actually quite spacious…”

Raha ran his knuckles over his lips, wishing he had the strength to say something ridiculous like Oh, I’ll break you in and still take himself seriously. With Bas’ir in his current state, he knew he couldn’t get away with it. Instead, Raha sighed. “Listen, friend. For the next moon, I must stay in this office for just two bells twice a week. If you could accommodate that in your very tight schedule I’d very much appreciate it.”

“Hmm. My schedule is plenty tight.” He leaned against the wood with his tail swishing over the surface, tousling a paper here and there. In profile, the mischief of his eyes was not so bright. With his hand on his chin he looked nigh pensive, like he actually thought about anything other than being the most beautiful mistake he could. “I just wanted to visit you on your first day.”

“As I thought you would. And I appreciate it.” Raha took the lull as opportunity to resume his search, fingering the inside of the desk, checking for irregularities, hidden compartments, anything of note against the old wood. The idea of returning to his mentor with his tail between his legs - no work done, no commentary left, and an embarrassing question on his lips - made him sweat. He’d have to fix this problem on his own or find a roundabout solution that didn’t involve blowing the lock off or otherwise dismantling the desk.

“Need help?” Bas’ir came around to the back of the room and squatted like an imp. “What are you looking for exactly?”

“Ah, well. I had forgotten to ask where - “

“My, it is spacious down here.” He poked his head under, bracing himself with a hand on the chair. Liking what he saw, he flattened his ears and turned to smirk.

Raha, to his credit, only let his eyebrow twitch once. “What? You think I’m going to stop you just because you’ve left the door open?” He took a stack of papers and straightened them on the edge of the desk - not because he needed to. Just for flair. “At this point in my academic career, I’m above wrangling you.”

“Yes, yes, how mature of you to let someone like me muss about between your legs.” Bas’ir’s tail slithered after him into the darkness. Keeping his knees to his chest, he eyed his fellow’s thighs with suspicion. “That decision may come back to haunt you.”

Raha crossed his ankles to keep them out of the way. “Let me know if you find anything down there.”

“I...may have…”

“Hm?”

About two seconds later, Raha knew he should have expected the man to jokingly palm at his intimates. When he did, he scooted the chair back with a little grunt and peered beneath the desk, red-faced but serious.

“What?” Bas’ir said with foolish, blinking eyes, hand at the edge of his seat.

“Do you mind?”

“Not at all.”

“...fine.” Glancing at the open door, Raha pursed his lips, undid his belt, the clasp of his trousers, and produced his semi-alert member from his smallclothes, calling the other man’s bluff.

Bas’ir’s eyes widened at the sight. “Raha, if I’m honest...that didn’t take much convincing.”

“I have nothing to be ashamed of.”

“...no, you certainly don’t.” For a moment, he kept his hands to himself and his eyes on the prize. Is he calling my bluff? Am I bluffing? “Well...scoot back, if you would.”

“You said you didn’t mind.”

“Lower the chair.”

“I...I can’t be certain whether it goes any lower.”

Bas’ir leaned forward and fiddled with the seat to no avail, consigning instead to pull it closer. Turns out he didn’t need it lower. The desk was high enough he reckoned he could fit his head where it needed to be...if he dared take that path. He was a lot of talk. A lot of talk...but every now and then he simply had to put his money where his mouth was...or his mouth where his mouth was, as it happened. “Raha.”

“Yes?”

“I’m going to...do this, then.”

“Okay.”

He edged into position, peering up just once more to see Raha looking straight ahead with his eyebrows low. “During your office hours?” Bas'ir asked.

“See if I care. No one will be coming by this first day, anyhow.” He crossed his arms on the desk and bowed his head. Anyone who passed the room would have thought him sleeping.

He coiled his fingers around Raha’s cock, warm and fully erect by now. Bas’ir felt a bit hot from embarrassment and his own arousal. “You sound confident.”

Raha twisted his lips to keep his friend from hearing him gasp at the sensation. This was good. This was very good. Good enough to make him grind his thumbnails into the skin of his knuckles. And this man had barely started. “As do you, for someone hiding under a desk.”

“Hiding?” Bas’ir pulled away, kept only his thumb at Raha’s cock. “Would you prefer I make my way elsewhere?”

He winced, thankful the cover of his arms hid the heat of his face. “N-no...you may...remain there. For now.”

“Hm. For now.” Bas’ir took a deep breath and rode his tongue from Raha’s base and up before stroking with a bit more vigor.

Raha inhaled sharply, cursed under his breath “Have you done something like this before?”

“Gotten you off?”

“No.” He held his breath and let a few more beats pass. “Something...risky like this.”

“No.” Bas’ir rubbed himself through his clothes. A contradiction, he was eager to please his friend but loathe to undo his own trousers, as though that would spare him from suspicion should someone interrupt. “Have you?”

“Would I have done this with…” A grunt cut off his words. “Anyone but you?”

“I’d hope not.” His tail thumped against the desk. “Will you come?”

“Maybe if you...use your mouth…”

“You’re sure the heavy risk isn’t stimulating enough on its own?”

It was stimulating, Raha hated to admit. He pushed out the air in his lungs and reconfigured his position, hips forward, forehead in his hands like he was confronting a great problem. Best to put some literature in front of his face, too, just in case. The part of his brain that sought pleasure had eclipsed the part that wanted so badly to be a good little scholar. Now, instead of thinking we shouldn’t do this he thought if we do this once we will surely do it again. “Please.”

Bas’ir bit his lip and pressured his erection harder. Maybe he would cave and free himself after all. How rapturously good it felt to be wanted by this man, if only carnally, and only for a moment. Keeping his hand at Raha’s base, he lapped around his tip before taking him in.

“Oh, gods…”

The little sounds Raha made lit a fire in Bas’ir’s hungry heart. The sound of footsteps lit a fire in his brain. A hand on his shoulder urged against his initial instinct of pulling away. The chair scooted farther in, urging the Keeper, cock in his mouth, a bit farther back into the darkness.

Raha found himself looking straight at a bespectacled Auri historian he recognized from his mentor’s lecture that day. She hadn’t spoken or asked any questions, but had scratched notes the entire time. Now, like then, she was stone-faced and carrying a bag loaded far over capacity. “You are Master Minoir’s assistant, are you not?”

“Y-yes, that’s me.”

Bas’ir could just make out the conversation with his ears cocked to the side. Seeing as he had nothing better to do, he eased himself up and down, minding his lashing. If they were going to get caught, it’d be of his own ignorance, not his tail’s.

“G’raha Tia?”

“That’s right. I didn’t catch your name?”

She answered, but Bas’ir couldn’t hear, seeing as he was focused on flushing this man’s face, or perhaps making him bang his fist against the table if he could. Seeing no other course of action, he brought his tongue into the mix...and slipped his hand beneath the band of his own trousers.

Raha faked a cough and pulled at Bas’ir’s shirt. The Seeker was smiling, but otherwise proud of how normal he thought he thought he looked. “Is there aught with which I might help you?”

The Au Ra shifted her weight. Ever poker-faced, even if she suspected something strange was afoot, Raha figured he would not have been able to detect it. “I simply wanted to introduce myself. I am shy to ask questions before my comrades, but have plenty to ask.”

“Ah…” It was less of an acknowledgement and more a poorly hidden gasp of pleasure. One he hoped Bas’ir hadn’t noticed.

But Bas’ir had noticed and thought deeply on it, working for his own pleasure and - more importantly - Raha’s. If he could just make him squeak or jump or shake - that would satisfy him for many moons.

Raha clasped his hands at his forehead and looked down at the sheet he’d lain on his desk, exhaling.

“Is something wrong?” the Au Ra asked, leaning forward a bit.

The Seeker mumbled something. He knew she’d ask for clarity, but he had to make a decision first. A decision he made by wringing his fingers in Bas’ir’s hair and pushing him down hard, so hard he thought the man might gag. And if he does, he deserves it. The pleasure gave him goose skin and he wiped his bangs from his forehead to distract his guest from his quivering lip. What in seven hells am I doing?

Despite his questions, Raha cleared his throat. “Yes, er, actually - if you’ve plans to see Master Minoir would you tell him he’s left me without a certain key I need?”

She tilted her head. “I’ve just been to see him, but I’m certain he hasn’t gone far.” She gestured over her shoulder. “I would be happy to ask him, if you’re busy.”

Raha tensed his legs and lowered his head, trying not to snarl at this poor, poor scholar. “Just. Pondering a particularly troublesome puzzle of our field.”

Bas’ir tried to stay quiet, fully convinced now he could make this man come if he tried hard enough. Raha’s knee hit the side of the desk, and the new position gave him the leverage he needed to just slightly edge his hips back and forth into Bas’ir’s ministrations. The Keeper had to admit he was not only impressed but enthralled. Up to this point the boldest thing he’d seen Raha do was challenge a traveling adventurer to a shooting contest. And now he was getting ready to come in front of an ignorant stranger?

The girl bowed her head. “I’ll return shortly, then.”

Raha grunted, perhaps a bit too obviously. “Mm. If I’m not here upon your arrival p - pray return the key to Minoir, would you?”

“Of course.”

When she turned, Raha put his other hand on Bas’ir’s head and waited long enough for her to pass through the doorway, glowing eyes minding the eccentric just once more, before he scooted the chair back and thrusted in and out of the Seeker’s mouth as hard as he’d wanted to, panting with every fuck, halfway standing. By the time he came, his leg muscles burned from the strain.

Bas’ir groaned around his cock and slowed his pace before lolling his tongue about once more and swallowing what he had happily received. Sweat pooled at his neck. He should not have worn a scarf.

Raha pulled away when he was ready and fell back in his chair, covering the upper part of his face. His companion wiped his mouth and whispered. “Are you all right?”

He only shook his head and fixed his member, his button, his buckle. For a while he sat there, just breathing. No sounds filtered from the hallway, but he wasn’t sure he would have noticed them anyway. Bas’ir felt like some kind of creature at his position but dared not move. For all his jabs, he couldn’t help but admire Raha’s physical appearance...those arms of his in particular...and since the Seeker was covering his eyes, that gave him plenty of time to gawk without giving him the satisfaction of being gawked at. Eventually, Raha stood and made for the door.

Bas’ir crawled out from under the desk and poked his head over the side. “Is everything all right?”

No answer. Just wood to wood, a click, and suddenly their public spot became a bit more private. Thankfully, Bas’ir had time enough to stand and remove his scarf before Raha came back to the desk and coaxed him backwards onto it. Clumsy hands knocked over one of those ugly paperweights. Bas’ir turned to look, but Raha grabbed his chin and forced his gaze forward. “I saw what you were doing,” he said with a pout.

“What I was doing?” Bas’ir tried to keep a straight face, failed.

“Trying to please yourself and humiliate me if you could?”

“Well! Aren’t you bold today.”

“Selfish, don’t you think?” He let go of his chin and crossed his arms, wondering how good a show he was putting on. “...still hard, then?”

“Hpmh.” He twisted his lips and flared his ears back. “Well, yeah.”

“And I’m sure you expect me to do something about it?”

Had it happened earlier, Bas’ir would have protested or sassed or fought or squirmed his way around the question. Hoping he maybe still had the energy to wear his facade, he offered a fang-graced grin. “Well, it’s...it’s only fair.”

Raha kissed him - something they did not often do - and placed his hands over the other man’s, only to lift them and guide them to his center.

The hint was taken. Bas’ir looked to the side and freed himself, ready for something - but certainly not for the strong arms that urged him from the desk and turned him around. “Wha - “

“I’m not going to use my mouth,” Raha said, leaning into him and reaching around his waist.

“Oh! Ah…”

Bas’ir craned over the desk, backing his hips up, clenching his eyes shut. He knew it wouldn’t take much, and that was probably another thing Raha could hold against him, if he wanted. But for now he held just his body against him and jerked him off. His knees were shaking already.

“Bas’ir,” Raha said, right at his neck.

“Y-yes, my friend…”

“You are...turning me into a pervert.”

“You say that like this is the first time you’ve had me bent over a desk.”

“Well…” Raha set his other hand at the base of Bas’ir’s tail and pressured down. “This is the first it’s been a desk not properly owned by one of us.”

“Mm.” Thoughts of past encounters brought him even closer. Would that they could have owned a desk together, shared a room perhaps. “Breaking it in.”

Raha still couldn’t bring himself to use his embarrassing joke, but he knew he could bring this man to bliss. Once he’d run his tail all the way to its end, he caught the back of his head and pushed his face down onto the wood, the papers. Yes he felt a little bad about it...but he felt much better when Bas’ir groaned his name.

“Raha…I...” Tongue pitched at his lip’s corner, he could hardly speak through his pleasure. “I’m...sorry for…”

“Sorry for what?”

“For making fun...of your arms.” His tail tensed around Raha’s thigh, in time with his uneasy breathing. “You use them very effectively.”

The Seeker couldn’t help but blush a little. “Well...focus on my hand instead.”

He was focusing. He was focusing on each stroke, each pulse of pleasure, the pressure on his back and building in his knees. He was focusing on the strength that strained against him and wondered how it would feel to be properly held by those selfsame arms, and he wondered if he would, perhaps, have found the answer, had he not danced around so many opportunities, like he’d danced away from Gridania. It pained him to think on how easy it was to fuck somebody, to get fucked and never have the courage to conjure up something deeper than rapture, rapture, rapture…

Bas’ir’s knee knocked into the wood. He was tearing up. “I’m going to...soon…”

“Please do.”

“Shall we...move about a bit?”

“I think not.”

He breathed in and held it, trying not to let go in more than one way. “Oh gods - at least just - please, let me - in your mouth - “

“After the respect you’ve shown me?”

A finger, then another crept over his lips, forced his head back, eyes to the ceiling. “P-please. Don’t make me.” Quieter, next. An earnest plea? Or just a step closer to bliss? After all, Raha was giving him what he’d wanted all along: something strained and electric and earned. This experience was one he had fought for, one he would think of in his loneliest hours, when his dear friend inevitably tired of him. As he spoke the words, his eyes rolled back. “Don’t...make me…”

Raha nipped the exposed skin of his neck and lingered until he felt come on his fingers. But even then he didn’t stop stroking. He smiled into his associate’s skin and kept at it, kept working his slick cock like he hadn’t noticed - when finally Bas’ir’s hips started jerking back against him with each repetition.

“Th-th-th-that’s e - “

“Enough?” Raha stopped but didn’t let go until he’d kissed the pink spot his teeth had left.

“More than, in fact…”

A knock at the door. Both sets of ears turned accordingly, but nothing else moved.

Bas’ir opened his mouth first but was slow to speak. “A moment,” Raha called. He caressed his friend’s cheek. “We’ve an unfortunate mess to clean up.”

“Won’t you come...come over tonight?” Bas’ir said, nuzzling Raha’s hand like a pitiful kit. “If you can fit that in your...very tight schedule.”

Raha almost cracked in anticipation of the absurd response he’d come up with. The past bell’s events had put him exactly where he needed to be if he wanted to make a stupid joke. Thank the gods, he kept his laughter in until he could spit it out. “I’ll fit in your very tight schedule.”

[negasonicimagines]

My One and Lonely

whew! this was intense! I’m really sorry if this doesn’t correctly fulfill these requests, folks! i tried! 

1: “okay what about poly yukisonic x reader where the yukio, ellie, and the reader have started a new relationship, but the reader is unsure of it?? and Ellie and yukio just reassure thems?? basically I just want poly yukisonic x reader angst with a happy ending. : ')” 2: “Could you do a negasonic imagine where reader is her girlfriend and has telekinesis? And Wade takes any opportunity to tease the couple so reader constantly uses her powers to slam the door in Wades face?” [yeah i defo didn’t really fill this one but the reader has telekinesis and DOES slam the door in Wade’s face and I have so many requests bro... but I’d be willing to redo this if you’re not satisfied] TRIGGER WARNING for mentions and discussion of past abuse. the reader also almost has a panic attack. let me know if i missed anything

“You know, you could just talk to them about it,” Wade tells you, and your fork and book fall to the ground.

“Uh, no? I literally can’t, dude. Now my fork’s dirty.”

“Uh, yeah. You literally can, dude. And that’ll teach you to be lazy, using your powers for easy stuff like turning pages and eating. I bet the fork’s not that bad.”

“Like you wouldn’t do the same thing,” you scoff, and he shrugs, nodding.

“Come on. It’s totally normal for you to be feeling the way you are. They were friends and dating before you came into the picture. Insecurity’s normal. Especially considering-”

“Call me insecure one more time and I’ll use the dirty fork to show you just how insecure your eye’s placement in your skull is,” you threaten, feeling your face heat up. You didn’t like that your weakness was so obvious. Or that he reminded you of her.

“Christ, maybe I really am a bad influence...Nah, we’re just birds of a feather,” Wade says with a cheeky grin you don’t know how you can see through the mask. Maybe his tone of voice makes the subtle expression more perceivable. “Sorry,” he quickly adds. “But, seriously. They’re the last people who are gonna judge you.”

“Who’s the last people that are gonna judge Y/N?” You hear from behind you. Ellie. Shit. She made you far more nervous than Yukio did. Yukio was the gentle, sensitive moon, and Ellie… Ellie was the sun. Nuturing, yes, but scorching, too.

“Well-”

“No one. Not important. Right, Wade?” you plaster on a smile, fiddling with the fork in your hand before letting it float in the air. “Want the rest of my ramen? I’m not very hungry.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

“Catch,” you say, flinging the fork at him telepathically. He gasps sharply, but his reflexes are quick enough to grab it.

You get up, and notice Ellie looks a bit… gloomier than usual.

“Everything okay?” you ask, and she nods, her lips twitching into a small smile for you before quickly concealing the expression.

“Yeah, I’m alright. ‘Kio and I missed you at lunch, that’s all.”

“Well, I was, uh… Hanging out with Wade. Like you saw,” you explain.

“You didn’t seem very happy. He didn’t say anything to bother you, did he?”

“Oh, uh, no. I was just a bit stressed. Exams coming up and all that.”

“Exams are a couple months away,” Ellie reminds you. “But you were stressed, weren’t you? Look, if you’re having regrets, whatever, fine. I wouldn’t be happy about it and neither would Yukio, but you have a right to your feelings. Just don’t fucking lie to me, okay?”

“I- I promise it’s not about that. Really, I’m… Happy to be with you guys.”

“Then what is it? Seriously?”

You stiffen, you can tell she’s getting angry. Your heart feels like a stone in your chest, cracked and heavy.

“It’s nothing,” you say, not meeting her eyes.

“Alright. Keep your secrets, then,” Ellie sighs, walking away. You head to your room, locking the door behind you. Most students with telepathic abilities get their own rooms in an effort to avoid accidental harm of their fellow students. This was the case for you, and you used to like it.

But then, you met Ellie and Yukio. The two of them were already dating when you were officially introduced, and you became fast friends with them. It quickly evolved into more, and the three of you became what many refer to as a “throuple.”

The facet of the insecurity Wade so rudely talked of earlier was, of course, the fact that they were roommates, and you were alone every night. They got to cuddle and kiss and you got to watch ASMR.

It was depressingly lonely. Sure, every once in awhile you could get away with sleeping over on weekends. But, most of the time, the teachers monitored the rooms, making sure everyone was where they were supposed to be, in case of emergency.

But, wait, there’s more!

As mentioned previously, Ellie is the sun. Yukio is the moon. What are you in that?

And it didn’t help that you were still struggling to cope with the aftermath of her, a little over a year later.

Before you began your schooling at Xavier’s, you were friends with a small group of fellow mutants that were slowly drawn together by fate. One of these mutants was a girl. You can’t even bear to think her name.

Back then, you were only telepathically gifted. You hadn’t even dreamed you would be capable of telekinesis one day.

But she, she had super-strength, and she liked to use it on you. Even when you didn’t want her to.

You were defenseless.

You shake, pulling your knees to your chest.

“Hey, why’s the door locked? I thought we were all gonna work together on our art projects.” Yukio’s bright voice is muffled by the door.

“Uh, um, yeah, yeah, I’ll be there in a, um, sec,” you say, your breathing growing heavier and more fast-paced. “Actually, uh, you- you and Ellie sh...sh-should just go and, uh, go work on your projects t-together. I’ll- Yeah, I’ll, uh, figure mine out eventually.” Shit, I’m doing a terrible job at covering this up.

“You okay in there, bunny?” It was a cute nickname that Yukio liked to call both you and Ellie.

“Mmhmm, yeah. Just a bit, uh, very tired. Gonna take a nap soon.”

“Okay…” she says, and you know she doubts you. Failure.

“On second thought, uh, I’ll just go to bed early tonight. Let’s get to work,” you decide, unlocking and opening the door.

Upon opening the door, you notice Wade behind them.

“Didn’t realize you took Art, Wade.”

“You also didn’t realize that we planned for you to come to our room. You were supposed to show up twenty minutes ago, actually. So, we went to talk to Wade. Since you tell him everything these days,” Ellie says, pure bitterness in the mention of Wade. It wasn’t that she hated him. She hated that you told him and not her. Not even Yukio, who she’d admit was far more approachable than her.

“Sorry, kid,” he says. “They had a right to know.”

“You- You didn’t tell them about- About…” You feel your eyes widen, alarm racing through you slowly and quickly at the same time.

“No, not that. Not her. Just the other stuff.”

“Oh.”

“Her?” Ellie asks. “Cheating on us, seriously?”

“No,” you say, and it comes out as a whimper due to her angry tone. “I- I- This was a bad idea, Wade. You guys should just go, all three of you, I don’t feel well, I’m tired, I-”

“I’m gonna leave you kids to sort this out,” Wade tells you three. “Good luck.” He slowly backs away.

“Can you close the door?” Yukio asks, and you jolt, door slamming in Wade’s face.

“Yeah,” you say afterwards. This was becoming less stressful thinking and more panic attack by the moment.

“You’ve been avoiding us lately,” Yukio points out. “Wade already told us why, but… I want to hear it from you, ‘kay?”

“It’s nothing, I-” You take a careful, ragged breath, sitting on your bed. Yukio sits on the stool at your desk, and Ellie leans her back against the door. “I just don’t fit. I’ve never fit in anywhere, and I never will. All I’ve done trying is bother others. Especially Ellie and you.”

“You don’t fit?” Ellie asks. “What the fuck do you mean?”

“I- You’re the sun...Yukio’s the moon… And I’m just… I’m Pluto.” The last bit comes out as a shaky whisper. A large, hot tear rolls down your cheek swiftly.

“What?! No! No, bunny, you’re- You’re…” Yukio kneels in front of you, swiping your tear away with her thumb and keeping your sad face in her hand. “I can’t think of anything, but you’re not Pluto, baby.”

“The eclipse. You’re the eclipse, Y/N. Everything aligning perfectly so that we can be together,” Ellie says thoughtfully. “Is that all? You feel like you don’t have a place here, with us? You do. You’re what makes this whole thing work, okay? Now please, please tell me you didn’t cheat on us for validation.”

“The her comment, right…” you say, the temporary relief you felt by Ellie’s original statement subsiding. “No. I didn’t cheat, I swear. I’d never do that to you guys, to anyone. I… The last relationship I had before you guys was, um… Not the greatest. It was around a year ago, a little more. Before Xavier’s. Before I honed my abilities. There was a girl, a mutant like me. Like us. But she, uh… She had super-strength. And I wasn’t very physically strong, I was pretty weak, actually. So… You can probably see where I’m going with this, or I hope you do, because I don’t like talking about it, not at-” You finally dissolve into tears. “Not at all…”

Ellie rushes towards you to embrace you, and you flinch reflexively.

“I’m sorry. I was really thoughtless. Just now and for most of our interactions today,” Ellie admits. “I’m just… Things between me and ‘Kio weren’t the greatest, but we were trying because we knew we were meant to be together. And then you came along, and everything made sense. Everything finally fit together, perfectly. And- And I don’t wanna lose that. Ever.”

“Same here,” Yukio agrees. “You’re so great, Y/N. Wade said that you feel really lonely all by yourself in here. Maybe we should try to get you transferred to our room. Sometimes they let people room in groups of three, and they probably could use the extra room.”

“Yeah, but… It’d be kind of annoying to have me tagging along all the time,” you remind her.

Ellie’s eye twitches. “Tagging...Along?”

“That’s the phrase, isn’t it?” you ask.

She takes a deep, calming breath, and you watch her fingers move as she counts to ten on them silently. They’re both sitting with you on the bed, now.

“Ah-” Ellie clenches her teeth, hissing for a moment, as if she’s in pain. “Y/N, you’re just as much a part of this relationship as Yukio and I. What part of that is so hard for you to understand?”

“I- I don’t know. It’s just hard to believe. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“What shoes? There are no shoes here,” Yukio tells you. “I really only wear them because it’s frowned upon not to, and because if I didn’t then I’d pick up all sorts of nasty germs.”

Ellie nods in agreement. “Same.”

You sigh, knowing there’s no way to convince them of how worthless you are to the relationship. Maybe because to them, you aren’t?

“Hey, did you see that? I saw that. I think it’s clicking, ‘Kio.”

“I did see it,” Yukio agrees, and you smile a little at their antics, shaking your head. “Let me go to the office and get the room transfer forms. I’d love to stay, but I think you two cuties need to talk a bit… In private.”

Yukio exits.

“I’m...Sorry. For talking to Wade and not you guys. I shouldn’t have-”

“You’re allowed to confide in your friend. I shouldn’t have taken it as personally as I did. I just know there was a time, before we all got together romantically, where you would’ve talked to me or Yukio about something if it stressed you out that much. But I guess not… We didn’t know about her.”

“It’s just hard to even think about. I feel so ashamed all the time, I’m really sorry that I didn’t-”

“Seriously. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to, and I feel seriously shitty that I was such an asshole about it. You have a right to privacy, as long as you’re not putting anyone or anything in danger. But, the anyone and anything includes you. Okay?”

“Okay,” you respond, and Ellie kisses your forehead, her dark brown eyes looking to yours before she places the softest kiss on your lips, carefully holding your face as if you were priceless and she didn’t want to risk breaking you. You lean into her, forehead on her shoulder.

“Let’s lay down. I owe you some cuddling. I hear I’m an excellent big spoon,” she tells you.

“From a biased source. Let’s try the sweetheart’s cradle,” you offer.

“What the fuck is the sweetheart’s cradle?”

“Honestly, I did far too much research into the perfect cuddle position, for the time it might actually happen.”

“We don’t really cuddle, do we? Yukio hasn’t really given you any cuddles either, has she? Wow, you’re really missing out- ...Oh. I’m so sorry,” Ellie apologizes, looking more heartbroken than determined with this one. She hadn’t realized the extent to which you were being neglected by them. “I’m sorry, doll. Really sorry.”

“Doll? That’s new,” you comment.

“I figured you deserved a petname of your own,” Ellie informs you. “Now, explain this ‘sweetheart’s cradle’ to me.”

[thecorteztwins]

Fanfic Friday idea: Fabian has decided to become a nun so he can eventually cure those poor girls of their "pure" ways! But alas!! Turns out he joined a cult instead!! One that needs a Male sacrifice....who will save the great Cortez now???

(Hey thank you for sending this!! I really appreciate it so much!! Sorry I took so long to write it!! I changed a bit because I actually headcanon Fabian as the type to PRAISE nuns for being pure, since in typical hypocritical sexist fuckboy fashion I think he would deride female promiscuity/sexuality even though logically he should think it’s a GOOD thing when he wants to get laid, while thinking chaste women are angels and should be respected…while calling girls “sluts” if they say “no” to him. Men like him make no sense, man.Tagging @awkward-snake-girl​ for a Mattie mention at the end, and I put in some Hulks ex Machina for you!)“Wait, what do you mean you’re not nuns?” said Fabian, spoon halfway to his lips. It was full of some brown mush not worthy of him, but he was in some desperate straits with no other options, and, well, they were nuns. He wasn’t going to be rude to them. At least, he’d thought they were nuns. He was in a chapel. They wore habits. Fabian was raised a good Catholic boy like most in Spain, he knew nuns when he saw them. He knew them, and he trusted them. Of course they’d take him in and shelter him on this strange, stormy night.Well, stormy day, technically. But said storm had rendered it as dark as night, as though it had blown out the sun itself. Like an impromptu eclipse. “Well, we are nuns,” amended one.“But we’re not Catholic” expanded another, “We’re not even Christian.”“What?”, Fabian was more confused now rather than less.“There are nuns that aren’t Christian, “ a third said in a tut-tut tone,“Haven’t you ever heard of Jainist nuns or Buddhist nuns? And there are lots of female priests and shamans and such in other religions, they’re like nuns even though they’re not called that!”“So…what are you?” said Fabian, confusion fading. “Why, silly, we’re devotees to the Great God Set! One of the Elder Gods, the first gods of this world, long before the Asgardians and Olympians were ever breathed into being by their all-mother Gaea!”“Uh, I see,” said Fabian, confusion returned in full force.“Set, Lord of the Reptiles!” the nuns chorused. A crack of lightning punctuated the sentence with unsettling timing.Well, Fabian decided, when in Rome…“All hail Set!” Fabian bellowed, slamming a hand down on the table, “I am a devotee of Set myself, ladies! I just didn’t realize you were as well!”

“Oh good, then you know what this is about,” said one of them warmly. Surely this young man must have been sent to them by more than chance! It was beyond coincidence to imagine he would not be, on this of all nights!“Of course,” Fabian faked a knowing smile, as though they were all cohorts.“Well then, we can dispense with the trickery,” said the most senior matron of the coven, gesturing to him and the slop full of sedative he’d been served. “Sorry for the confusion dear, we didn’t realize you were in on it.”Next thing he knew, Fabian was shirtless, garbed in ceremonial jewelry, and bound on an altar in an underground chamber to the great cthonic god of snakes that the Sisters served.“Are we sure that I am most suitable?” he was still trying to talk his way out of this,“Most worthy?”He hadn’t tried this argument yet, since he knew it would be the least likely to work. What a ridiculous notion, Lord Cortez being unworthy in any way! But all his other plausible excuses for being let go had run out.The matron pursed her lips as she looked down at the sacrifice that had been sent to them,“Well…perhaps not. But we need a male for this ritual and you are the only one we have.”“Please!” he pleaded, though he couldn’t think of what he could claim. That he WASN’T a man? Wasn’t ENOUGH of a man? It would never work! Just look at him! Just listen to him! He was the paragon of maleness in both body and soul! Oh it was hopeless, they had been sent the perfect sacrifice and they knew it, they would never give up such a prize as himself! Who would? They wanted to give the best to their god!He was so absorbed in his own self-aggrandizing misery that he missed much of the ceremony, the splashing of incense and underground mineral water, the spinning of him on a stone wheel, the speeches of how the coldblooded would once again reign the earth, and so on. He didn’t notice any of that until—“Haven?”“Hello Fabian,” said the tall, shapely, dark-haired woman with far too much calm for someone who had just been led in gold chains down the aisle to the altar by nuns gripping her.“I admit, I’m surprised to see you.”“What are you doing here?!” he asked, displaying far more bafflement than she did.And what in God’s name was she wearing?! It wasn’t that he was complaining, it just…well, it wasn’t her usual style, put it that way. It was probably some kind of ceremonial garb the ‘nuns’ forced her into. “I’m to be the mother of Set’s child,” she said with equal calm, perhaps resignation, and the nuns nodded in confirmation as she continued, “Last time, they tell me that they tried for seven, and used quite prominent superheroines—the Scarlet Witch, Storm and Jean Grey, She-Hulk, to name a few. I suppose they decided a smaller number and more obscure person might be safer.”She did not mention that the reason she of all people would be ‘coincidentally’ be chosen was her history as a vessel for demonic entities before. That was not something she went around talking about, and she didn’t want to bring it up even now.Fabian seemed satisfied enough with the explanation as it was was anyway. It made sense plenty to him without that additional information. Haven was a little old to have children, sure, but if she still could then he thought she was a great pick for motherhood of anything, even evil snake gods. That was the main reason he liked her so much, bestowing her the rare favor of his lordly friendship—she was just such a good mother. He had a thing about that. And because they were friends, he could count on her to rescue him! Er, that is, count on her cooperation in helping him to rescue her!And just as he was getting ready to doubtlessly do EXACTLY that, the wall burst open to reveal a squad of Hulks.While the Agents of S.M.A.S.H proceeded to free the pair and make short work of the would-be Set-summoners, Haven, still placid and peaceful as you pleased, explained their appearance to Fabian, how they new they–well, she—was here.“They tried to recruit Mattie as well, you see. She was with me when they showed up, and you know, her mutation…it attracted their interests. But she got away. And assured me she’d get help from her friends. We just had to wait.”“Well,” Fabian clapped a hand proudly on Haven’s shoulder, “It’s lucky I was here!”THE END

[kurara-black-blog]

Then Sadness

Date: 19/08/18

Words: 1848

Warnings: Langst, Shance, eventual polydins, Lance’s Harem, pining disaster gay!Shiro

Tag: @moonsworllld​ ; @zoeyheys ; @klangst-drabbles ; @de-campbell ; @nyanbacon ; @lady-of-jazz ; @averypottermormon ; @voltron--headcannons ; @jamieisamess ; @aichi-phantom ; @moyasolkoroleva ; @loncemcuwu ; @goodbibabygirl ; @the-ironic-queer ; @carthix ; @eirikland ; @fan-but-no-art ; @edhelwen1 ; @midnightfries01 ; @likeimnotmyself ; @l8rpaladudeswee ; @fics4fun ; @thotugou-thotsuki ; @v-analogical ; @supercalifragilistic-depression ; @yecum-morte69 ; @eclipse-dd ; @the-supreme-ace-bitch ; @into-sum-gay-shit ; @justanotherphangirl ; @abrokitten

(I said I would tag everyone who left a comment on that post, so here it is. I’ll tag people on the second part as long as they tell me they want to be tagged.)

Part 2: Once

Based on this post.

“Lance is so noisy!”

“Good morning to you too, Pidge.”

“Good morning, Shiro. Lance is so noisy!”

Pidge huffed as she sat at the table, picking some of the food goo and shoving into her mouth. Hunk smiled at her, he knew his best friend could be very annoying when he wanted to. Keith snorted, of course Lance was noisy, he was Lance. Shiro and Allura only chuckled. Coran was too absorbed in one of Slav’s ramblings to acknowledge the girl’s presence.

“Can you guys believe him? He spent the whole night talking and laughing while I was trying to concentrate! And he kept on pacing, and I’m sure he was stomping with so much force on purpose, there’s no way those were his footsteps, he has light feet!”

“Calm down, Pidge, before you choke.”

“I’m gonna choke that idiot…” They laughed at the grumbling girl, Keith even getting into the joke and offering to help her.

“You should know how Lance can get already, Pidge. We’ve been friends for some time now.”

“Doesn’t make him any less frustrating, Hunk.”

The subject changes, each of them taking the cue to complain about the Blue Paladin. Slav had finally stopped his monologue, letting Coran join the fun. The alien watched they whine and moan about Lance. There was no sign of bad blood, only an incredible fondness. Soft smiles and adoring looks. They truly cared for their paladin; it was obvious to anyone. That reminded him…

“In at least 29% of the existent realities, all the paladins fall in love with Lance.”

Silence, so thick Keith could probably cut it with his knife. Hell, Hunk could cut it with his spoon. Allura was the first one to react.

“What…?”

“Why are you all so surprised? With how much you like him, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is one of these realities.”

More silence. They had no idea how to react. The idea of one of them falling in love with Lance was already absurd; imagine every single one of them falling in love with him?! Impossible. Maybe the other realities were really different from theirs.

Lance choose that exact moment to enter the room. His skin shined, his smile showed off white teeth, his hair looked extremely soft. He was with his usual jeans and sneakers, but with a blue t-shirt he bought on some Space Mall. Didn’t take much time for Lance to decide he was not going to use the same clothes every day, no matter how great altean technology was at washing them while he bathed—“This is not an anime, guys” he had said. It was tight and a V-neck, letting the team see the muscles he was so proud of and putting his large shoulders in evidence. His blue eyes—bluest blue—gleamed with that same old joy of seeing his teammates.

Had Lance always looked so good?

“Good morning! What did I miss?”

Silence. Lance’s smiled dimmed a little, confusion invading his mind.

“Why are you guys looking at me like I’m some kind of rare oddity?”

Coran’s laugh made the team get out of the trance, their cheeks burning with red. Lance sent the old man a questioning glance, slowly sitting beside Hunk. The man only shook his head softly and gave that mysterious dad smile. You know the one, the “I know what’s going on but I want you to find out by yourself because I think is amusing and is a good life lesson for you” smile. The rest of breakfast was little awkward, with Lance trying to talk with his friends and said friends trying to stop thinking how good he looked that morning.

The only consolation they had was that everything would be back to normal in the next morning. After all, that sudden realization was only possible because Slav caught them by surprise. They just had to survive the rest of that day. Easy.

Boy, were they wrong.

It was as if an umbrella was shut and they couldn’t open it anymore, leaving them soaked with the insistent rain. After they noticed Lance that first day, they noticed him every day. They were looking at him, really looking at him, and, God did they like what they saw. None of them would admit it. They hid that behind a veil of curiosity; they only wished to know why the paladins from the other universes fell in love with Lance. A smug dad smile had permanently painted itself in Coran’s face and the team wished nothing more than to wipe it off. You know the one, the “you’re lying to yourself and I can see it, but I’ll let you figure things out even when I already know the answers because it’s a good life lesson and very amusing to me”. That one.

As they noticed more and more about Lance, said boy noticed more and more their weird behavior. He wasn’t dumb, something happened to his teammates and he wanted to know what. He had asked Coran about it, the alien only gave him another dad smile and left, mumbling something about “young love”. Well, it seemed he would’ve to do everything alone. He could do that, just go to one of them and ask.

And ask he did.

The first one was Shiro. It was the middle of a mission, everything was going fine, when Lance decided to finally confront his team. Who better to start with than the leader of said team, am I right?

“I’m sorry, what?”

“You heard me, Shiro. I want to know what’s going on with you guys.”

“What do you mean, Lance?”

“Allura blushed when I told her a joke, Keith looked constipated when we were sparring, Pidge runs every time she sees me, Hunk is a shuttering mess when I’m near and even you seem less…” He searched for a word, keeping his eyes trained on the older man. “Graceful?”

“Are you sure it’s not your imagination?” Shiro asked nervously, trying to ignore the panicked voice in his head demanding him to run back where the others were. He hadn’t felt that ever since Adam and, being honest with himself, he did not miss that panicky feeling.

“Shiro, sorry to tell you that so bluntly, but you’re acting like a gay disaster right now.” Then he smirked. “Maybe you have a crush on me? I mean, I am irresistible, you know?”

Boy, did Shiro knew. Lance looked especially good that moment, with messy helmet hair and sweat running down his temples. The planet had a very warm weather and while the armors could cool down their paladins, they used the same energy as the boosters, so the team decided it was better to keep the boosters working in case they needed to run. They were luck the Garrison was near a desert, so they were less bothered by the warmth. Talking about armors, Shiro was really appreciating the way Lance’s accentuated the boy's broad shoulders.

If you haven’t noticed yet, Shiro was a shoulders man.

And, well, Lance’s shoulders, am I right?

“Shiro? Earth to Shiro?”

The Black Paladin froze, Lance’s face was too close for comfort. Bluest blue staring directly at his eyes. Oh, God, his heart was making some sweet samba inside his ribcage. Thoughts were running a marathon inside his head. Blood was rushing to his ears. Air was leaving his lungs. Shit. Shit. Yeah. Okay. Maybe Slav was right. Maybe it was one of the 39% universes. Maybe he had a crush on Lance. A small one. A small crush on the Blue Paladin. Small. He could deal with small. He could deal with having a small crush on his teammate. He could deal with what the universe was throwing at him.

Alarms suddenly blared. They were discovered. In less than a few minutes, the entire galra population of that base was going to be there, trying to kill them. They needed to move. Shiro snapped right back to his role as leader, his—small, mind you—crush on Lance could wait. Looking at the boy, they nodded to each other and ran back to where their friends were.

“Pidge, how’s the download?”

“Almost done, I need more time!”

Takashi went silent for a bit, trying to think on a plan, but Lance’s voice interrupted his thoughts. Lance was telling the team his plan—when did he plan all that?—and Shiro couldn’t feel more proud. He knew Lance was smart, but his observant nature was a very welcomed surprise. The plan was very good, and the Blue Paladin even offered a few solutions in case something went wrong. His mind was on fire, completely focused on the mission, any trace of any other thought completely gone. Shiro could see it in his eyes.

“Nice plan, Lance! You guys heard our sharpshooter, let’s put that plan in action!”

“Thanks, lion king.” Lance smiled so endearingly, Shiro didn’t had the heart to roll his eyes at the nickname. His heart was too occupied writing the next part of that samba.

Shiro could deal with a small crush on Lance.

“Let’s kick some galra butt!”

He couldn’t deal with a bigger than Voltron itself crush on Lance.

Fuck.

“Lance is so noisy!”

“Good morning to you too, Pidge.”

“Good morning, Shiro. Lance is so noisy!”

Pidge sniffed as she sat at the table, picking some of the food goo and shoving into her mouth. Hunk smiled weakly at her, the memory of his best friend’s loud voice fresh in his ears. Keith huffed, of course Lance was noisy, the universe would be too silent if he wasn’t. Shiro and Allura only sighed. Coran was too absorbed in poking his food goo sadly to pay any attention to the grieving girl’s entrance.

“Can you guys believe him? He spent the whole night talking and laughing while I was trying to concentrate!”

He hadn’t. It was all Pidge’s memories. Because Lance wasn’t there. He was galaxies away, lost somewhere, maybe even imprisoned by the enemy. Because he was too selfless. Too loyal. Too Lance.

“Calm down, Pidge, before you choke.”

“I’m gonna choke that idiot…” They laughed dryly at the mumbling girl, Keith offering to help her.

“You should know how Lance is, Pidge. We’ve been friends for some time now. He’s been done things like that ever since the beginning.”

“Doesn’t make him any less frustrating, Hunk.”

The subject changes, each of them taking the cue to tell some story about the Blue Paladin. Slav watched their futile attempts to ignore pain the silence the absence of the Blue Paladin brought. Coran still refused to enter the conversation, even though it was obvious he was listening. There was an incredible fondness in their broken voices. Soft smiles and adoring looks. Tears running freely, sobs rising to the skies. They truly cared for their paladin; it was obvious to anyone. That reminded him…

“Of the 29% of the existent realities where all the paladins fall in love with Lance, only 3% don’t end in tragedy.”

Silence.

Then sadness.