#of our contracts. so. yeah
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trying to check out to see if i'll ever manage to get top surgery this year and. let's just say i thought the delay would be bigger but. the price is still always such a big ass problem i kinda wanna bash my head against a wall but. anyway
#living with 600/month and having no idea if i'll ever get a job after this semi-work that ends in march but. oh well!!!#already tried to calculate if i could ever save any money from the little time i get to work there but!!! only make me wanna cry#im afraid this will be another year w/o top surgery 😀 dying in the summer and wishing to rip my skin off. w/o the hope i'll at least#get a date some day. cos at this rate i have absolutely no hope ngl.#the whole organisation to get to one of the potential surgeon 2h away is already making me want to explode#i have absolutely no idea how i'll ever be able to pull this off. ever. i don't even know if we'll be able to stay in this flat by the end#of our contracts. so. yeah#i can't see past 4 months away how can i think i'll ever be able to start this thing going. trying to but i stay silly ing the situation but#!!!!! im so desperate i feel so drained and exhausted. the mere idea of summer makes me wanna kms i'm dreading going through it another year#smh.#absolutely no one gives a shit i shouldn't vent in da tags for the 1 day of the yea#but im suddenly hit with an enormous wave of despair that i know won't go away cos it's always on my mind#and seeing the facts once again that i'll prob never be able to afford it is not helpiiiinh#yes i live in france no not everything is paid by healthcare cos it's still considered as non vital </3333#dental/ear/teeth problems started to get fully refundable (on specific little things) only a few years ago#so we're like decades of getting top surgery refunded 100% im afraid</3#i shouldn't complain but then again what's the use of cool healthcare if we can't ever have access to a doctor. of any kind.#smh smh smh#rent over I'm sick of myself i'll shut up sorry
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Dungeon Meshi: The RPG
#Dungeon Meshi#laios touden#marcille donato#chilchuck tims#senshi#animation#game dev diary#Please give a huge hand to my coding partner#who labored for over two weeks to figure out how to implement reaction animation for the battle icons.#You may also notice that I updated the battle portraits from my previous post! New and (mostly) improved!#The death screens were not changed because I didn't think they'd get used for this video.#But Chilchuck getting one-shotted and leaving due to this being outside of his pay? Accidental comedy gold.#The full sprite (I didn't realize the bottom third would be hidden) says: “NOT PAID FOR THIS”#And yeah he's smoking. He gets a smoke break as part of his contract. Let a guy have his vices. He's teetering on a divorce.#Dungeon Meshi would be a fun rpg in theory but it would need to have immersive mechanics like cooking and foraging.#And hunger and fatigue and other status effects.#A slightly more lighthearted fear and hunger sort of game.#But that is for some other fan to do. This is just a fun tech demo for us to learn RPG maker!#So...with this mini-project concluded#we now have a foundation we can pass over to our actual game!#Next game dev post will be some game assets (probably busts and battle icons for the main party)#And after that! Most likely some more sprite sheets (I have made a few more since my first attempt)#Thank you for everyone who has been rooting us on since I started talking about this project. It means a ton B'*)
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I aim low / I aim true, and the ground's where I go / I work late, where I'm free from the phone / and the job gets done, but you worry some, I know
“TOO SWEET”, Unreal Unearth: Unending (2024) [ HOZIER ]

In “Too Sweet” Hozier draws a contrast between two individuals with different lifestyles and preferences, one who enjoys living life at his own pace, indulging in simple pleasures like whiskey, coffee, and late nights while not worrying too much about conforming to societal norms of waking up early and living a disciplined life, and a second individual, presumably the partner, is portrayed as someone who values discipline, health, and structure. They encourage the narrator to live a healthier lifestyle, waking up early and taking care of themselves.
Born from the 3rd Circle of Hell, Gluttony, same as his track, “Eat Your Young”, Hozier examines excessive mess and overindulgence, similiar to Dante’s depiction of gluttony where it not only refers to overconsumption of food and drink but also the overindulgence in any worldly pleasure to the detriment of spiritual growth.
GENIUS ANNOTATION
#squid game#seong gihun#hwang inho#inhun#gihun x inho#gihun x frontman#squid game 457#457#001 x 456#ginho#my art#pretty self explanatory but hozier x squid game is mandatory at this point#inho to gihun like yeah. yeah. yeah don’t you wanna wake up dark as a lake#smelling like bonfire lost in a haze. if youre drunk on life i think its great but while in this world#gihun’s too sweet in a way that is clear and detrimental to his own wellbeing while inho himself has been made bitter with living. what joy#is there to be found in the earth or in the lives of others beyond expense. what do we owe to each other and what can we get out of it. why#would we stay without the contract of obligation or the weight of love that can’t feed our bellies. what is the point of feeding our hearts#I AM SUCH A SUCKER for au’s without the games where they meet in real life and clash of will and worldview still changes them as people#and both of them are forced to carve themselves a new life with the knife they give each other and they are happier for it#office au’s or restauraunt au’s or meet cutes or high school au’s or what#i want recs so sos os sosoosooo bad hmghgngn#smt about these sad sad old men
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im trying to sleep but i can’t
how’d you know that?
#gfh is parallel to this argue w the wall#even disregarding the theory abt tb being the clancy before ty and pretending ty giving him a mask isn’t meaningful#and pretending that ‘you can take it off when you’re ready’ ‘they won’t know it’s you’ don’t mean anything#the contract’s non lore meaning - to me - is abt the pressure and obligation tyler feels to keep making music to help us stay alive#when he’s struggling with his own battles. knowing that the loss will be far greater than himself but being exhausted#ANYWAY IM NOT GINNA GET CARRIED AWAY TGERE BUT WHAT IM GETTING AT#is that it ties back to the meaning of guns for hands and how he begged ppl to channel their pain into his music and how he made it for us#gkd it’s 2am i am NOT explaining this right#but like . yall know what gfh is abt. its not just ‘turn our guns to a fist’#it’s abt ‘i simply tell them they should shoot at this simply suggest my chest’#i don’t think we properly acknowledge the amount of pressure we have inadvertently put on this band but tyler especially#i cannot imagine how exhausting it would be to feel like you are partially responsible for the mental health of tens of thousands of people#i’ll probably come back to this in the morning and try articulate wtf i’m trying to say better but like#tldr i adore tyler and think there’s a LOT of pressure on him to channel his pain into his music to help us and fear he’s exhausted#i hope they have a nice break after the breach era and that he manages to get closure#idk i can’t words rn im fighting to keep my eyes open i just love him and worry and yeah#anyway whatever haha gfh tc parallels waow#art2 and craft2#cliqueart#twenty one pilots#tøp#torchbearer#breach#clancy#josh dun#clique art#the contract#also this was a relatively quick piece i did not try to render this ‘properly’ like i usually would w this brush/style apologies#however this was just meant to be a palate cleanser between dr pieces so i refused to work on it for longer than 2 hours#ALSO THE GUNSHOT MOTIF DUH I WAS THINKING ABT IT SO MUCH I ASSUMED ID SAID THAT
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When u gave up yr bfs life against his wishes to the monsters that took it in the first place and u come out the other end still dying anyway so u either live the rest of ur life managing the slow mental degradation of ur mind till eventually u end up dead in a motel somewhere all alone brain leaking from yr nose or u relinquish yr life to the company allowing it to keep u locked up as property for what will practically feel like eternity in the same purgatorial cell they kept yr bf in for all those years! because they totally super prommy to give yr soul back once they find a compatible body that they can put it in! one they'll totally ethically source just like that one guy did to his son! creating this cycle of one life stealing another for another for another! or worse! If they create this body something that is finally compatible where u won't live on in a total state of constant metaphysical organ rejection and they put yr soul into it yr soul might not be their property anymore but haha that body is now! so no matter what there isn't a fate where yr escaping the debt u'll always be in to this company :) and it really just leaves u with the question, the one asking u if u could even say this was all worth it in the end, giving up the one you love for something that was always so inevitable? :)
#thinking abt the devil ending!#its so fun guys when u remember that johnnys engram is now back in the hands of arasaka!#and its not comfirmed whats been done to him! haha do u think theyre keeping hold of it for safe keepsies!#or shredded him or got him locked back up in soul prison!#like lol! v really did that to him! :)#ALSO U DONT EVEN READ THE CONTRACT B4 SIGNING#oh i for sure know Arasakas throwing fine print in there thats like yeah!#totally just a temporary relinquishment of yr rights as our property!#except have u thought that actually we own the code and prigrams yr engram was made of so sike! u thought :)#ALSO no WAY if they find out a way to put a soul back into a compatible body r they just going to let that tech walk free#au where V's engram becomes their guinea pig for this exact thing :(#plagued w really fun thoughts rn actually :)#cyberpunk 2077#silverv#v cyberpunk#cyberpunk v#devil#ult speaking#on another note. this is actually one of my fave endings :) this and temperance bc apparently i dont know how to let myself b happy#and ironically enough the endings with the two highest potentials of betrayal! self or otherwise! yay!!!
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Yall
I unofficially officially have an eight week contract with The Art of Education university to produce video tutorials for their graduate course on digital illustration AND despite not getting the subject matter expert position, I’ve been signed on as a consultant for it too
AND a referral from the curriculum chair towards an open graphic design position with them
AHHHHHHHHH
#please cross all of your fongers for me#the art of Ed is a BIG deal for art teachers and a dream company of mine to work for ahhhhh#I can’t wait to get started#the chair and I have such a good rapport I really like her#I knocked her socks off so hard during our second interview/meeting on Monday she added on the consulting bit#and went to the dean to get me more compensation#can I get a hell yeah?#I havr the contract now I just have to be added into the system so I can formally sign shit#middle school class was rough today this timing is ace
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#think i met my soulmate at work she was there for trial didn't sign anything yet and now i fear she is the one that got away#because i haven't heard any news AND WE DO NEED HER I NEED HER OH MY GOSH she stayed an hour longer than she had to#she enjoyed our conversation so much and complimented me throughout the day i was so awkward the whole time haha women make me blush damn#whatever you do queen 😭😭 i should have asked for her contact i should have... but i didn't WE HUGGED SHE SAID#'wow you smell so nice' WE WERE IN LOVE#and instead of telling her the brand i said 'yeah i didn't shower i was at a wedding last night' WHAT#we already made a deal to go on vacation together during that one hour conversation PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE boss send her a contract#° › OOC ‹ 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄 * out of character ╲ MUN .
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Requested a copy of the personal data tumblr has on me.
I'm trying to think how I feel about them keeping track of my answers for every single poll I've ever voted in. Knowing they could sell this information if they wanted, even though I opted out. I think I'll be more cautious with my answers in the future.
#Gonna start lying on my blog more maybe#The greatest thing a person can do in this day and age is obfuscate the data collected on them#Never be so ignorant as to say “I opted out it's fine”#Okay we opted out of tumblr sharing our posts with AI and all it did was limit sharing to their contracted partner#We answer so much demographic data in these polls there's no way advertisers don't salivate over it#I personally feel stupid because I'm like#“Don't wanna make this info public. But it's fine to vote in an anonymous poll where tumblr remembers the answer. There's my icon."#Yeah I feel dumb now#I'm cautious everywhere but this goatforsaken site#Too comfortable#Gonna change that#tumblr
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ok yeah the emotional whiplash yesterday of the positivity of duke’s comments contrasted with tee’s simple but Complete Dismissal (that we’re assuming at least) via cap tweet was.... A Lot. a bummer note to go to bed on! but after some sleep and Rational Thinking…
obviously the team has not presented an offer that tee’s camp is happy with yet, or else the deal would be done by now lol. and very few extensions have happened yet (the first major one i think only yesterday with the bills receiver, who while i’m sure is talented, isn’t on tee’s level)! so when duke is out here saying that they’ll do whatever it takes to get tee done, tee obviously doesn’t feel that way yet, because i’m sure the offers are simply not good enough at this point!
now of course we’d PREFER for them to just give tee what he wants and get it over with, especially after everything they’ve put tee through….but that would be quite a high expectation for a team that has never proven to be able to work like that lol 🫠
and the thing is, maybe there are offers that are close. again we know tee switched agents. from the guy known for the most lucrative guaranteed deals to ja’marr’s agent (who is also quite good but he’s not DM). we know money is not tee’s most pressing concern (but it is obviously up there! because of course it is!) but from the side of tee’s camp, it actually doesn’t behoove the agent to get a deal done too quickly.
to get a deal done, before free agency, where tee would be set to break the bank with a bidding war, without the leverage of the tag, would not look good to other potential clients! clients would look at that and see the agent as cutting off opportunity for more money, more options. and why should the agent do that unless its a last resort à la the tag. it would, frankly, look like piss poor negotiating.
so again, the tag is unfortunately a pretty important step in negotiations at this point. that’s where all the leverage will be put on the table. my guess is that it will happen (although i hope it won’t) and then they go from there. and we just pray it gets done before OTAs 🙏🙏🙏
#god this is maddening and i knew it would be#truly we should all just mute tee's name from our socials until september but!!#i'm not wired that way 😔#so instead i'll just panic and reassure and panic and reassure and live that cycle until i am either Stronger or it Kills me :')#negotiating sucks. business sucks. there's gonna be a lot we see that we don't like until this is all over with#and then ofc there's always the possibility tee is fucking with us like he did last month with the praise god tweet lmao#but yeah. he has every right to be pissed with how we've treated him.#and if it doesn't work out then i hope he gets so much happiness and success wherever he goes#but god i want that happiness and success to be with us. and he does too!#don't fuck this up katie and troy!! (the ones who actually have final say on all contracts)#tee higgins
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I snapped today at work, and by snapped I mean I politely commented on a help desk ticket by summing up an mess of an (type of) issue that's come up for at least the fourth time in the 2+ months I've been managing user accounts, and asked the person responsible to fix it (himself for once) because last time I fixed his mess-up it took me two whole days to work out the details with at least four other colleagues from different departments and I really don't want to do it again. there's other shit that needs doing, I've been working 10+ hour days for most of this week already, so I need to cut down not add on more.
(good thing tho - at least we managed to fix the issue where the dataset of a newer employee got mixed up with another one of the same name and therefore wasn't able to apply for any of the access/accounts she needed. technically not entirely my area but it does impact us not being allowed to create an account for her so I figured I might as well track that issue down. took three days and at least three other people, but hey - it should all work out now. yay for that)
#been feeling anxious af ever since bc it's the first time I've been this firm in a reply and idk how they'll take it#there's underlying issues in inter-departmental communication that need fixing that cause these issues to happen again and again#but my boss is on parental leave and his substitute is sick not that she cares or is up for doing her job where communication is concerned#so there's no real sense in addressing that rn esp by me who's only been there since June. but it does frustrate me a lot#anyway. I'm sure I'll get over this too. but yeah.. ppl not thinking things through for the two mins it takes to create an account#or the twenty seconds it takes to check if one already exists before creating a new one#or the minute it takes to check if folks still have an active contract past their time working in your department before deleting an accoun#just jfc. put in a smidge of effort and five mins total and save the rest of us from spending half a day to fix your mistake#oh well. if I get a pissy response I'll just blame it on being new as an intern and being too motivated and idealistic I guess#god forbid I expect people to do their jobs thoroughly or with at least a singular thought..#anyway. I feel like I'm allowed to be grumpy abt this since we are the folks who end up having to fix this shit#and by we I mean pretty much mostly me at this point bc one colleague is sick atm. my boss barely has time for this and is on leave#and my other colleague only works half time so I'm the one who's been handling most of these over the past month or so#which.. is still insane considering how I'm a goddamn intern who shouldn't even have admin rights tbh#but without them I couldn't do anything at all lol so here I am. nice that they trust and believe in me I suppose#that's why I try to do my best. (who am I kidding that's always the case anyway)#but yeah. definitely a 50% staff support job and only 50% of the other important things that need doing rn it's more like 90/10#and it's funny how I still dread my two hours of hotline. but every time the line is too busy I still jump in#we are also only 6 people atm out of 10 and three of us are still in training. and one of the trained folks had to come back in mid time of#next week we'll likely be 4#depending on if our substitute boss lady is back.. not that I'd look forward to it. she's a mess and she's been horrible to deal with latel#sure. she's stressed. but she's either snapping at me when I ask abt shit I can't know yet or she's ignoring me. great basis for team work.#so honestly I'd rather she not return on Monday. esp not if she's gonna spread her germs everywhere#but now sleep. sorry for the rant. it's certainly been quite the month since I returned from my own wisdom tooth rated sick leave..#gotta be up again in 6.5 hrs so I can be at work at 6 to let the electrician in. I'm gonna sleep so hard over the weekend I stg#a day in the life of..
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I think some of the arguments about fan interpretations of characters and OOCness forget a fundamental part of human nature which is this: each of us perceives the world and the people in it in slightly different ways based on our own experiences.
Most people have certain characteristics they consider fundamental to their Blorbo and some characteristics that are less important and could be changed, ignored, or scrapped for AU purposes. Unfortunately, which specific characteristics fall into which category are not going to be the same from person to person. Sometimes the overlap between two people's interpretations will be huge, and those two people will probably enjoy the same fan content. Sometimes not so much.
Personally, I write for a ship that were childhood friends that became lovers. In many AUs, people have them meeting for the first time in adulthood, and for me, that changes the nature of the ship and their characters so much that I can't really get into it. I consider their childhood friendship fundamental to them as people, and those authors don't. Which is fine. Many other people like those AUs. Nobody here is really in the wrong, we just have different opinions on what makes these particular Blorbos them.
In almost all cases, someone out there will find your interpretation of a character OOC. And that's fine. Hopefully they are polite and simply choose not to read your fics/engage with your HCs/whatever. But I think all of us have had the experience of reading a wildly OOC take and seeing other people enthusiastically going along with this "wrong" interpretation of the characters and thinking, "What??!?!"
It's fine. It's normal. It's annoying as hell (people are wrong on the internet), but it's inevitable. And if you find that interpretation particularly heinous to your Blorbo sensibilities, the block button is your friend.
#fandom#fanfic#idk I saw that one post where someone compares like#some people saying chess is beating each other with sticks and it's normal for someone who likes actual chess to be disappointed#as an analogy for bad fandom takes and like... nah man#tons of games have different rules and that doesn't make the game wrong#like maybe you thought all poker was just texas holdem and someone comes along playing five card draw#you are both right they are both poker but you are coming from different life experiences to expect what poker is#characters are so much more complex than games with rules#what speaks to me about a character might not be what speaks to you and this will affect what we focus on/exaggerate/emphasize in ourfanwor#like yeah obviously some people are stone cold wrong BUT it is our burden to bear the weight of knowing and understanding their wrongness#I see new authors freaking out about like what if I'm OOC!!!!!!#and it's like... eh you will always be ooc to some goober out there go have fun#will never forget that one post with like over a thousand notes about how Fenris doesn't use contractions in speech#it was just... provably untrue#posts I expect no one to read lol
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i know i said i was staying off twitter but i lied and i've seen someone (annoying podcaster) saying we're making chelsea's project look like a good idea BE FUCKING REAL OH MY DAYS
#yeah shite players like mudryk and enzo being on 8 year contracts and huge wages looks GREAT because we're on a bad run#they're trying to push one of their best players out the club because their finances are so bad#nothing and i mean NOTHING will ever make me think that they're doing something right and we're doing it wrong#we're on the right path but our fans just have to shit the bed constantly#stacey speaks
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I feel like I’ve lived through at least a month just in the past 3 days. I checked the date just now and damn near had an out of body experience when I realised Monday was only two days ago
#bro the absolute sodding emotional rollercoaster i have been through this past week should be studied by scientists#thursday: unsuccessful job interview. friday: found out that the job interview was unsuccessful. but one of the interviewers (actually a#former colleague of mine lol) gave me a piece of feedback that made me feel like i’d cracked the code for all future interviews#it was this: keep. talking. give as many details as humanly fucking possible. talk about policy. drop in words like safeguarding#list as many examples of stuff as you can. tell stories. bamboozle them#OH i forgot to even fucking mention we had builders at our house until friday. friday was the last day they woke me up with a cacophony#so the weekend was uneventful aside from there was a skip in the driveway and scaffolding all down the side of the house but zero men#monday: successful interview. found out it was successful 5 hours later. got off the phone having accepted the job…… and found a text from#my old boss (the boss i had at the job i really enjoyed. that old boss) inviting me to come back this summer#i had a bit of a mental breakdown but eventually decided to stick with the job i’d just got because it’s a permanent contract and they will#let me sit down#yesterday: found out that the foster doggy i applied for and really wanted is going to her forever home on thursday (which is now tomorrow)#obviously i love this for her but i was like ‘damn. okay’#today: the foster co-ordinator was like ‘hey do you want to foster this rambunctious 3 year old unneutered terrier?’#i was like ‘sure yeah what the fuck. that might as well happen’#(they are neutering him beforehand. and he looks really cute. he’s not aggressive he’s just a young terrier with like 3 brain cells)#unless something finally kills me in the meantime i’m picking him up on monday. i cancelled therapy in order to do this. yes i’m well aware#that there’s a metaphor somewhere in there but it’s fine. i rescheduled therapy#i also have realised i do not know how and when i’m going to get my ssri prescription renewed… i know the pharmacy will call me in a couple#of weeks to make sure i haven’t died. but i think i was supposed to get a prescription renewal at therapy#the therapy i won’t be going to until like 5 days after my prescription runs out. that therapy. foook#honestly withdrawal symptoms would probably just spice up the situation at this point. they’d just make things interesting#i swear to god everything always gets crazy and stupid right before my birthday… remember when i turned 26 and couldn’t drink because i#was on antibiotics for a kidney infection. and when i turned 27 and one of my wisdom teeth tried to emerge#this is like that except with dogs and jobs. at least the skip and the scaffolding are gone now#i AM trying to sell a sofa on facebook marketplace so wish me luck with that ig#personal
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the worst part of having an office-like job is when you ask someone a questions and instead of answering you, they slap you with a 30 pages pdf and say "Please refer to the attached document."
like first off, if i understood the document i wouldn't have a question
second, you do realize that's basically the same as telling me to "fuck off and figure it out" in office speak, right?
#times like these makes me want to burn capitalism to the ground#like fuck offfffff my job is event planning not translating your fucking legal jargon bullshit#My question was literally “Hey I'm a bit confused with how this is worded. Are we collecting your payment on the first day or last day?”#and karen mccorprate says “Please refer to page 10 of our fully executed agreement.”#like i don't understand page 10 that's why i'm asking you to directly!!!!!!!!#also calling it a fully executed agreement makes you so sound defensive and offended that I would even ask the question in the first place#like excuse you i didn't offer the contract nor is my name on the signature line#i am literally here to make things run smoothly#and knowing how payment is going to work would really smooth out the road for everyone involved#i have fought a pack of feral dance moms and kept them out of the ballroom before because the even organizer failed to pay us#i can take a couple of disgruntled dudes in suits and ties#but yeah knowing if my bosses agreed to taking payment before or after is kinda a big deal#like i'm not going to waste my day reading through three pages of leagl jargon bullshit if I can get an answer from you in two seconds#but noooooo you gotta go an make things difficult#rant#work time fun
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I have never had so many complaints about my s/o. I feel like you could do so much better is he like a housing necessity or
i feel like i only post the L's so thats kind of on me but. also kind of yes bc ive been unemployed for 2 months so hes been the breadwinner and has paid rent in that time
#i also get very annoyed very quickly and its something im still working on so. thats a lot of it too#but. im thinking our time together is ending soon i just cant pull the trigger bc we're so intertwined and idk what happens after#like. we still have a rent contract until OCTOBER. and yeah he could afford to live here by himself if he really tried but. i also dont want#to just up and leave yknow. idk its all very weird and unfortunate and rushed i think so. now we're reaping that#i need someone to talk to this about like over coffee. like a third party. this is why i miss therapy sm#asks#anoon
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#yeah so widar isn't staying at lotto after next year is he#i mean technically he's got a contract through 2027 but like. there's no way#heulot talking about “showing our teeth” after the van gils debacle and yeah that's absolutely a 100% totally positive thing to say#second problem is that when jarno leaves he's almost certainly gonna end up at red bull and like. can we not
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