#once again asking if they simply do not know how the line of inheritance works
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Loki didn't even do anything to the other Asgardians personally, unsure why they didn't like him so much and thought he was so suspicious
#i was thinking about what crimes loki did do and like. lying to thor/hurting his feelings was IT??#like he didnt spit in hogun's face or kill sif's mother#so why do they have personal grudges#is it because loki argued when they said to makw odin take thor's punishment back? unlikely#they didnt like loki before that either!!!!#and we're never told why!!!!!#if it was justified by their noble characters then it would have come up#fandral wouldve been like no we cant suspect loki and someone else wouldve said but remember when he killed a guy!!#or 'but he has done such before...' etc.#but no!!#apparently it just IS#he hasnt done anything personal towards them which is actually a wild decision to make#loki with a squeaky clean record gets the throne bc thor was banished and they jump him#:/ ?????????#did he at least poison fandral once or something#that's so mean#thor is the only one who can hold a grudge because of the lying thing#everyone else was going off hearsay and as the prophecy foretold. APPARENTLY!!!#once again asking if they simply do not know how the line of inheritance works#even loki understood that much and he was of the opinion that the family was pulling shenanigans with him
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ִֶָ☾. See You Later!
cw: war au pairing: megumi x OC, dad!Satoru wc: 2k
part 1 | part 2 | part 3| part 4 | part 5 >>> coming soon!
"Arata!" I ran after her, slightly out of breath as she stopped walking when I caught up.
"You mentioned knowing a woman named Kiyomi a bit before the war started, right? She was my mom's best friend?"
Arata looked confused by the sudden question but answered anyway. "Yeah, Kiyomi Fushiguro. Why? Did you find something on her?"
My eyes widened. Fushiguro.
Megumi’s mom.
“…No.”
“Then why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”
I snapped out of my daze, mouth slightly agape.
“Just… she’s the mother of my close friend. Well, actually, not a close friend. Someone really dear to me.” I stumbled over my words like a lovestruck idiot, a hint of pink dusting my cheeks as I took a deep breath. Gosh.
Arata just smiled knowingly, gesturing for me to take my time.
“She’s the mother of my best friend. Megumi. Dad had been taking care of us both since the bombardment that presumably 'took out' his parents, older sister, and my mom.”
Arata paused, looking at me like I was the eighth wonder of the world.
“You know Megumi?” she asked softly, almost gently. I should’ve been surprised she knew how to be soft-spoken, but I wasn’t. Not after what happened this morning.
“Yeah. We’re, like, attached at the hip. He’s basically the only friend and support I had. My brother got stuck outside the country when the war started, so Megumi was there in his stead.”
I’d thought she knew I was friends with him — since Fengxian, Kiyomi, and she were close — but I suppose some things were better kept hidden.
Arata nodded, looking away for a moment before speaking up again. “I was told he died after the others.”
Oh, fuck no.
Megumi, dead?
I almost choked on my own spit. I wouldn’t — couldn’t — let him die. That one stupid, freezing night six years ago, I’d sworn to find him even if the world ended. I was dead set on keeping it that way.
“He’s cynical, sure. He’s also suicidally reckless — check. But he wouldn’t die that easily. I wouldn’t let him.” I said it too quickly. Too desperately. Too determinedly. Too lovingly — as if the mere thought of Megumi dying buried fear far too deep in my marrow.
Which it did.
I’d just hidden that vulnerability beneath the mask of a court fool — a façade built so others would only see what I wanted them to see.
Arata watched me closely, eyes sharp but unreadable. The silence stretched a little longer than it should’ve.
“You really care about him,” she said finally. Not a question — a fact.
I didn’t answer. Couldn’t. Because what was I supposed to do? Lie? About loving him? No way.
“You remind me of her, you know,” Arata said again, her voice softer. “Your mom. The way you deflect. The way you dig your heels in even when you’re scared out of your mind.”
I blinked. Something behind my ribs twisted.
“She once stood in front of a live mine just to pull me out of the line of fire,” she added, her voice distant, touched with something old and worn. “Told me, ‘I’m not letting anyone I love get buried in someone else’s war.’”
She looked back at me.
“I think you inherited more than just her stubbornness.”
I just nodded. The words I wanted to say were lodged in my throat like a knife through the heart.
It did sound like something my mom would do — risking herself to save someone she cared about.
But I couldn’t remember her. Couldn’t picture her in that moment.
I’d forgotten what she looked like. What her voice sounded like.
That’s part of why I want — need — to find her.
And Dad. And Megumi’s parents. And Tsumiki too.
“Can we go to my house? I have someone to apologize to,” I asked softly, my voice pleading. Arata seemed to understand and simply nodded.
“Sure. I’ll tell Buzzcut we’re doing field work.”
-----------------
Returning to the place I grew up was harder than I thought it would be.
Seeing all the things I left behind that night two months ago - God, sometimes I wish I had just stayed strong enough to handle things as they were.
No answers. No knowledge. No truths.
Maybe then things would’ve been better.
Maybe I wouldn’t have left the only person still alive —
alone.
And unfindable.
Megumi wasn’t here.
I panicked, rushing down the stairs into the basement where we used to sleep — but silence welcomed me. And the almost painful sight of the pillow fortress we’d made, now nothing more than a mess of fabric and plush on the floor.
Arata followed after me, sympathy written all over her face.
“It’s okay. He may have gone out to get food.”
“He hasn’t. We built that pillow fortress the night I ran away. It—it’s…”
I trailed off, the sentence falling apart as tears threatened to spill over. But I wouldn’t let them.
Couldn’t.
I had to stay strong. For Dad. For Mom. For Yuta.
For Megumi, too.
Speaking of Yuta — my older brother — Dad once said something about his room being the best location in the house.
My brows furrowed.
Everything else faded. Even Arata’s voice, calling out to me.
“…kira! Are you okay? Why’re you crying?” She came up behind me, turning my face gently toward hers. I blinked, snapping out of whatever daze had overtaken me, wiping my face with the heel of my palm.
“I’m okay. I just remembered something Dad said… about my brother’s room.”
Arata raised a brow, clearly confused, then let out an “Ooh, right. Yuta, correct?” and gave my shoulder a soft squeeze. “What about his room?”
I tensed.
Seriously — what about his room?
“I don’t know. I vividly remember Dad telling Mom it was the best location in the house. For hiding something, I presume, but—”
I stopped.
Eyes widening.
Hiding.
Hide and seek.
I was up the stairs to the third floor faster than my brain could smash the “oh no” button before I even processed anything yet—just bolted, straight into Yuta’s room.
It was somewhat the same, except one of the walls had been damaged in a bombing and the whole place was covered in rubble. I looked around frantically, and then my eyes landed on a specific drawer. I’d always thought it looked a bit out of place—the color was darker, the handle was different from the others. It was also locked at all times, which made it the perfect mystery for Megumi and me to obsess over when we were kids.
Yuta and Tsumiki had given up on trying to crack it ages ago. They were always more mature than us. More reserved.
Arata came into the destroyed room a few seconds later, wondering what the fuck I was doing.
Honestly? I didn’t know either.
I was just sitting on the floor with a hairpin (yes, the same one I used to break into the file room) and toying with the drawer lock like some nosy, unhinged kid.
“Fucking hell, what is this thing made of?!” I hissed at some point, completely losing my patience and slamming the entire drawer set against the wall. Something inside that specific fucking drawer cracked. It clicked open.
Arata snickered behind me. I turned and glared at her like I was ready to commit murder. She raised her hands in mock surrender.
“There we fucking go.” I opened the drawer. Great. Another set of worthless white papers.
Still, I had no other choice. I started flipping through them anyway.
“You seem to be on an f-bomb strike. That normal?” Arata asked teasingly, kneeling beside me. The teasing disappeared the moment she saw my face.
I was crying now.
Compared to dropping f-bombs every two seconds, me crying was a rare sight. I almost never did.
The message was handwritten—on old Monopoly money and a folded hide-and-seek scorecard. It had been stuffed between the useless papers.
"You picked the thimble — small, but brave, I took the seventh step, my cave. The banker speaks in polished lies, but only when the dice disguise." "Go to Jail — a cursed square, yet safest when the world’s unfair. Free Parking’s not a prize to take, it’s where we pause, not where we break." "Now count to ten, my clever light — your seeker’s gone, but not from sight. The game’s not done, the rules are bent. I'm hiding still. That’s what I meant."
Are dads always this confusing, or is mine a special case?
“Thimble, seventh step, banker, dice, jail, free parking, count to ten…” I muttered through tears, trying to connect the dots.
Arata looked even more confused than I did. Like she was trying to understand quantum physics with a hangover.
Understandable, really. My dearest Dad just had to use fucking Monopoly and hide-and-seek to send me a clue.
Then it clicked.
I stood up.
The thimble. The stairs.
Rushing downstairs again and going below exactly the seventh step, I crouched, fingers tracing the dusty wood beneath the stairs. The step creaked differently — hollower, like it was tired of waiting to be noticed.
Arata hovered above me. "Seriously? Now you're poking stairs?"
"Shut up and help me pry this one up," I muttered.
It gave way with a snap, wood splintering just enough to reveal what had been buried: a folded-up scrap of yellowed paper, wrapped around something small and metallic. My hands trembled as I unfolded it. The thimble fell into my palm, cold and familiar. And inside the folds of the note—
There it was. Faded, real, and ridiculous: a parking ticket.
I blinked. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”
I unfolded the attached paper fully. Not just a note. A poem. Another rhyme. Another code from a man who’d turned our childhood games into trail markers for survival.
"Free Parking’s not on every chart, but you and I made it a start. Spot Eleven-B, by rust and light, where shadows hum and vending bites." "Behind the screen where buttons blink, there lies a box — but not for drink. It sells no snacks, it hums no tune, yet hides the truth beneath the moon." "And when you hear her voice, you’ll see, what was lost was meant to be. So, bring the thimble. Bring your name. One more round — we’re still mid-game."
I reread it three times before looking up at Arata. Her expression was no longer confused. Just concerned. “What the hell does that mean?”
“It means I’m going to the old Horizon Lot,” I whispered. “Spot Eleven-B.”
-------------------------
The Horizon Lot was as forgotten as my father — a derelict parking garage halfway sunk into the earth from the last quake. Dust, rust, and memory clung to its beams. Arata parked near the entrance and killed the engine.
“You sure about this?” she asked.
I nodded, slipping the thimble into my jacket pocket.
We walked through crumbling silence, down into the half-submerged lower levels. Eleven-B was barely marked anymore, but I counted — second row, third column, tucked into the shadows. Just like he said. Rust and light.
And there it was: the old vending machine. Cracked screen. Buttons long worn smooth. But I could see the faintest glow still flickering beneath the busted plastic.
“He said it wasn’t for snacks,” I murmured.
I reached behind the machine, fingers brushing against metal.
A latch.
With a soft click, the vending machine shifted, revealing a narrow compartment tucked behind it — a black box, slick and locked with a biometric seal and an ancient keypad. I stared at it.
Then it spoke.
Not just a beep. Not just static.
A voice.
“Hello, sweetheart.”
My blood ran cold.
Fengxian. My mother. Her voice. Her actual voice — preserved, recorded, real.
She sounded calm. Gentle. Like she had just kissed my forehead and tucked me in, not disappeared in a fireball of lies.
“If you’re hearing this, then your father’s plan worked. You found the thimble. You found the note. And now, it’s your turn to finish what we started.”
I couldn’t breathe. I dropped to my knees.
Arata stood behind me, stunned into silence.
“This box holds the first key. Inside is everything you need to understand what Project Blind Sun really was, and what your father did to stop it.”
“Bring this to someone you trust. Someone who won’t break. You already know who.”
“We never left you. We just hid better.”
The recording ended.
Silence fell again, thick and deafening.
I looked down at the box. Then to Arata.
Then I whispered, more to myself than anyone else:
“Tag. I guess I’m it now.”
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taglist: @crimsonhallucinations
#gojo satoru#fanfic#fanfiction#jjk gojo#girl dad gojo#jjk crack#jjk megumi#jujutsu kaisen#megumi fushiguro#megumi x oc#satoru#toji#tsumiki#mamaguro#geto
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"Indeed there is. Me." His tone made nigh impossible to dismiss it as arrogance. For he made it known as the most unmovable truth. "As a mortal man, I was the son and heir of a feudal lord. I remain rather proud of my ancestry. Unapologetically so. But families like mine, contrary to what lesser noblemen would make believe centuries later, did not inherit the favor of the order of things by divinity or fate. The actions of their blood earned their dues. Further actions were to blame for their decay." His hand, in capricious whim, visited the edge of the bookshelf on his way to her. "Tell me, Lisbeth. What is the order you speak of but passing fashion once you live the fall of every empire that once proclaimed itself eternal? Societal sensibilities...There are eras that would deem me a savior. Others that would see the very same actions as the work of a devil. Truth to be told, I have no concern for either interpretation. What other dogma, principle or maxim could I know of that wasn't destroyed or eroded until it became something unrecognizable? I am the true order of things. The order of this world. If you are that enamored with the idea of soaring at the mercy of the winds of destiny, you will find I have no issue taking command. But for the record? It should be precisely the same for any other with the bravery to be displeased with what the world fated for them." He stopped for a moment, leaning to speak close to her ear with a teasing insinuation while her hands were occupied with the book. "Mischievous. A tad vengeful. Still, the girl was all the braver for her rebellion. My stubborn, little human." A sort of quiet, subtle amusement visited him when confronting her insistence. "Don't fear. I have no intention of breaking the word given to a lady who can quote me by heart. I am simply taking a moment to consider how to best approach your request without escorting you to a field of marred corpses." Addressed in blunt cordiality, a decision was reached. "Let it be the unconventional route. While I knew of it, I was not present for this one. Although it greatly affected the path my eternity took. I have seen it, and now I can show it to you, only centuries later. Thanks to the gift of a seer under my patronage. It was not the event we were looking for. But it provided interesting insight. See it as my own version of opening a lost journal and discovering its secrets. And given that most of my own memories of the time are drenched in blood..." He snapped his fingers. And once again, like the flapping of feathers belonging to some enormous, unfathomable bird of prey, the world around them changed. "Here. Translated for your convenience." He spoke nothing as the conversation escalated. Looking coldly indifferent, beyond the neutral effort of bringing the acquired recollection to life. Only extending his arm at a particular line. "The city is lost already! Our father is here with a legion of crusaders at his back!..." Until it was only the Aya on stage. And then, until it was only them again. "I arrived not long after. The man who abandoned them is the one who once made me immortal. You could sympathize with his struggle, no doubt. You are the kind to be grateful for the dubious existence of an vampire in your life, after all." He mused somewhere in between chastisement and complicity. "l ask that you never do while I can hear you. This is not him at his worst. And there are not all that many souls I hate. The woman survived his departure. So did many others. I took upon myself and went to great lengths in order to ensure that. The first of the vampires that you see under my lead these days. So, yes. I have seen crusaders. Quite closely. And I am older than the first Crusade. But the real reason why I chose to present it to you in this manner is that an universal chorus would have told you it was not my place to meddle between the one they called Mikael and the object of his wrath. That is how almost every noble family was made in their primeval origin. Deciding for yourself what your place is."
It was one of many times that she had come to realize her place in the world. That young lords, like her hopeful and failed romantic endeavor, wouldn't pay attention to the help. Like a line from a movie 'kitchen boys don't marry princesses', but that meant lords didn't marry stable girls either.
"There is an order to things, Tristan, and you know it." He knew that- she knew that he knew that. If he was as old as she suspected then he was most certainly raised in an era where status, title and position dictated your lot in life. While modernity had its place and its freedoms, she knew as well anyone that for as far as humanity progressed, they all still had their same problems and prejudices as they did in ancient times.
"I will always believe in fate- just as I believe fate let me..." She hesitated then softly added."- let me meet you. You absolutely could've ignored my call when I was tracking your journal's descendants. Its not important or revealing for you to be that concerned of what I read. And yet you came. "
Even still she flinched in his observation- about that call to action- and then grimaced looking away with a shake of her head. " I'm not heroine material Tristan. I do try not to completely delude myself with fantasies. I may like fantasy and fiction, but I know where I actually live."
-And if you are formidable enough...she couldn't help the laugh that slipped and she found the courage to move from the spot she stood in. Walking towards the bookshelves past him, curious to see the books that sat there as she thought on that. " Formidable enough. Well then, the universe will never crumble now will it? Thank God for that."
Fingers pried a book from the shelf before her and it opened to precisely what she had been wondering a moment later- the Holy War- though the information was no different from what she already knew. Lips quirked slightly in amusement before pressing into a mild scowl directed to the other at the returned question and dictation of specifics.
"You said it was an exchange of truthfully answered questions- you never said about what. I believe your words were 'A question for a question. No limits or protestations hindering the satisfaction of the other's curiosity.' And-" Her book now snapped shut in one hand. "you're being very difficult about an easy question. But if you want to be particularly pedantic then I will rephrase; were you born before the First Crusade? As a human, not a vampiric rebirth. "
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Summary:
Dick is suddenly very awake. He bolts upright, staring at the dimly lit figure. “Tim?”
“Hi, Dick,” Tim whispers. He isn’t in uniform for once, instead wearing a pair of sweats and a shirt that Dick recognizes as one of Bruce’s. Dick was wondering where that went.
“Jesus, kid,” Dick exhales, an uncertain mixture of disbelief and bafflement. “What are you doing here?” Tim and Dick are still in a fight of sorts, or are they? Have they made up yet, or is the terrain still cracked? Dick wants so badly to ask, but just having Tim in the same room as him is already more than Dick could have hoped he’d get.
The night’s patrol ended well over three hours ago. Dick has only been asleep for forty-five minutes. It’s one of the many, many drawbacks of inheriting the Batman mantle, right along with cowl sweat and sore throats. Being the head honcho entails all sorts of extra duties that Dick never had to worry about when he was Nightwing. Back in Blüdhaven, Dick could simply climb into his apartment through the fire escape window, strip off his sweaty uniform, and pass out on the mattress until noon the next morning. How he longs for those days now. Being a light sleeper is one of those parts of the job he’s carried with him from the beginning, which is why Dick shocks out of sleep the instant he hears his bedroom door creak. The penthouse’s acoustics aren’t anything like Wayne Manor’s. Every noise has Dick rousing from sleep, so unfamiliar to him. It’s nothing like the home Dick grew up in. Then again, nothing about his life now is as it was. The intrusion, even whilst half-asleep, prompts no alarm from Dick. Damian has been having troublesome nightmares ever since the encounter with Zsasz and some dead children a few weeks ago. Damian never admits to the dreams, but Dick knows they’ve been hard on him. While Damian would never confess to it in the light of day, frequent nights he’ll sleep in Dick’s bed when the nightmares get especially persistent. Dick never mentions it in daylight for the sake of preserving Damian’s white-knuckled pride. They’re still working on that. “Dami?” Dick mumbles, rolling over. “Y’okay?” He reaches out and fumbles for the bedside lamp, flicking the switch on the underside. He squints in the flood of light illuminating the small shape standing in the doorway—a shape that is definitely not Damian.
Dick is suddenly very awake. He bolts upright, staring at the dimly lit figure. “Tim?” “Hi, Dick,” Tim whispers. He isn’t in uniform for once, instead wearing a pair of sweats and a shirt that Dick recognizes as one of Bruce’s. Dick was wondering where that went. “Jesus, kid,” Dick exhales, an uncertain mixture of disbelief and bafflement. “What are you doing here?” Tim and Dick are still in a fight of sorts, or are they? Have they made up yet, or is the terrain still cracked? Dick wants so badly to ask, but just having Tim in the same room as him is already more than Dick could have hoped he’d get. Tim has been AWOL ever since the Black Lantern debacle came, ravaged, and went on its merry way. When the resurrections began, Tim had briefly returned to Gotham at Dick’s request, without a moment’s hesitation. Dick thought at the time that Tim would stick around at least a day or two after so many months abroad, all by himself. It’s what he would have done before. But by the time Alfred woke up to prepare breakfast the next morning, Tim was already gone—without a note, without a single goodbye. He didn’t even stay for Garth’s funeral. Dick foolishly thought that he and Tim had come to some unspoken understanding, some middle ground during the battle against their resurrected loved ones, their past regrets and mistakes whirling back to stare them in the face. Dick had hoped it was a start, but clearly it wasn’t. Clearly there’s no backtracking behind the line he crossed when he took Robin away from Tim. Dick tried to call Tim only once during his search, the day after Tim left Gotham. Straight to voicemail. Sometimes it was all Dick could do to keep from jumping on a plane and heading straight to wherever Tim was to drag him back home by the ear, just so Dick could sleep at night without having to wonder if Tim was safe, or if he was even still alive. Learning that Tim was fighting in Jason’s old Red Robin suit just escalated his fear. When Dick was Tim’s age, all he wanted was space. He sought to step out of Bruce’s shadow and find his own place in the world, and that’s precisely what he did. It’s what you’re supposed to do when you’re a teenager setting out into the world. Dick has been trying to give Tim that freedom, if nothing else. That is why the last person Dick expected to see tonight was Tim Drake in the Wayne penthouse, and not trekking across Europe like Dick thought he was. It’s more habit than anything when Dick does a quick scan, searching for any visible injuries on Tim that would have set him running home for help. There are none that he can see, but he doesn’t disregard the possibility yet. Even in the dim light, Dick can see that Tim’s eyes are bloodshot. He looks thinner than Dick remembers in the weeks they’ve been apart. Tim still hasn’t answered Dick’s question. ��Is everything okay?” Dick tries, fighting to keep his voice neutral.
At first, Tim looks like he’s about to say something. Then he gives up, and instead he wordlessly crosses the floor and climbs into Dick’s bed. Dick goes completely still, like he’s trying not to frighten off a wild deer. Tim’s weight beside him is familiar but ghostly. So much and so little has changed. About both of them. Tim is shaking. “Hey. Hey, what’s wrong? What happened?” It’s another habit when Dick runs his fingers through Tim’s hair like he used to when Tim was younger. It’s grown out since then, past his ears and halfway down his neck. Dick has kept tabs on Tim’s adventures abroad the best he could, but it’s hard to detect changes beneath the full-body uniform and cowl. Maybe that was why Tim chose it in the first place. “Can I stay here tonight?” Tim asks, his eyes pleading in the lamplight. “Please?” Dick doesn’t know if Tim means here at the penthouse or here in Dick’s room. The answer would be yes either way. “Of course you can, kiddo. You don’t even have to ask.” Dick can’t remember the last time they did this, it’s been so long. Well before Bruce died—more towards Jack Drake’s death, probably. When Bruce took Dick and Tim on that year-long trip around the globe, it wasn’t uncommon for Tim to turn to Dick for comfort when he was plagued by dreams of razor boomerangs and his father’s blood on his hands.
Tim was smaller then, pocket-sized, but he’s grown since then. He’s grown a great deal over these past months alone. Dick wishes he could have been there to see it. How many more scars does Tim have now? How many will Dick never know the story about? He’s had more than enough time to accumulate a new tapestry of pain in the months since the night everything fell apart—since Tim left Gotham, maybe for good, and Dick wasn’t sure how many brothers he had left who still loved him. Dick pulls the covers back up, tucking them around Tim who’s settled onto the pillow beside Dick’s. They lie facing each other, the glow from the bedside lamp illuminating their faces and casting forlorn shadows on the wall. Dick should ask where Tim has been all this time, or why he chose now to return. How long has Tim been back in Gotham without telling anyone? Has he been eating enough? When was the last time he slept? Is he okay? Is he okay? Is he okay? “Do you need to talk?” Dick tries instead, at a loss for how to handle this. It used to be so easy with Tim. Half the time, Dick wouldn’t even have to pry; Tim willingly parceled out every worry, every insecurity, and every fear he had, trusting that Dick would keep them safe. They used to be brothers. “I miss Bruce.” Tim states it like a fact, which it is. Maybe even a universal one. Bruce is missed. Bruce will always be missed. Dick’s heart throbs with that familiar ache that resurfaces every time he hears Bruce’s name, or sees his face, or smells his cologne sticking to the fibers of Wayne Manor like his ghost has seared itself into the very walls. “Yeah,” Dick sighs. “Me too.” “I’m sorry,” Tim says, timidly meeting Dick’s eyes. “For leaving. For all of it.”
“It’s okay, Tim.” Of course Tim knows it’s okay. Of course he knows that there isn’t anything in the world he could do that wouldn’t be okay. As if Dick wouldn’t forgive him for murder. “I don’t hate you,” Tim continues, like he’s had the words queued up for a long time. “When I—the night I left. The things I said. I didn’t mean them.” Dick will never stop regretting that night. There were so many better ways he could have handled the situation. He just—he got overwhelmed, desperate. Jason was already a lost cause, and Damian lived on the edge of following him. Dick couldn’t lose Tim too. That night, Dick told Tim that Bruce wasn’t a god or an immortal legend, which was true. Bruce was just a man, and men die. There was no vestige of Bruce for Tim to rescue. It was supposed to be a comfort at the time—some small reassurance that their lives don’t have to revolve around following Bruce’s lead. That they’re allowed to breathe without him giving them the air. Unfortunately for himself, Dick knows better than to fall for his own fallacies: Bruce was never just a man to them. Even now, Dick can feel Bruce’s eyes on his back every time he puts on the cowl. Batman is bigger than all of them. “I’m sorry, too,” Dick says. It’s long overdue. “I thought you wanted space. I didn’t mean to run you off.” The angle of the lamplight on Tim’s face makes the shadows smudged under his eyes look even darker. “You were doing your best. I was being a dick.” The corner of Tim’s mouth lifts slightly at the pun. “You’re a good Batman. You’re doing better than any of us could.”
Then, because the words have weighed him down like rocks in his throat: “I shouldn’t have given Robin to Damian,” Dick says. “Not without asking.” He’s run it over in his head a million times. All the ways he could have done it better, could have kept Tim from leaving and kept Damian in check at the same time. It was just so hard picking up all the pieces Bruce left behind. Making Damian Robin was an easy fix—it kept Damian under Dick’s wing, gave him something of his own he could be proud of, and allowed Dick to teach him in a controlled environment. Tim just…he fell through the cracks. Dick didn’t stop to think about how Tim would take the news until it was too late. When Dick was Tim’s age, all he wanted was to go out and become his own man. He left Gotham and carved himself his own spot in the hero community with the Titans, and in turn, he experienced some of the best years of his life. Leaving Robin for Nightwing was a crucial turning point in Dick’s life—an inevitability that led him to discover who he was and where he was going. Baby birds all need to leave the nest eventually. Dick just wishes that Tim hadn’t jumped to die and had instead jumped to soar. “Did it help?” Dick ventures to ask. “Going out there?” He doesn’t ask if Tim found anything. He doesn’t ask if Tim’s impossible mission has borne any fruit. Dick won’t risk losing this tenuous ceasefire. Tim shrugs, his eyes fixed on an ancient chocolate syrup stain on Dick’s pillowcase. “Learned a lot. Did a lot.” Dick wants so badly to ask what a lot is supposed to mean. He wants to know what prompted Tim to come back. He wants to know if he’s allowed to get used to it, or if he needs to prepare himself for another swift departure. “But I missed home,” Tim says.
A risk: Dick reaches across the uncertainty between them to put his hand on Tim’s shoulder, smiling thinly. “I’m glad you came back.” “I’m still going to find him, Dick. I haven’t quit.” Tim swallows, meeting Dick’s eyes in the darkness. “I know you think I’m crazy. I should probably be mad at you for it, but I’m sick of losing people. I don’t want to do it anymore.” It’s a punch in the gut Dick knows he deserves. “I never thought you were crazy,” Dick offers, and it’s mostly the truth. “Not once.” Tim’s eyes have taken on a glassy sheen. He blinks in an effort to disrupt it. “I think…I think maybe I am crazy? Was. Might still be. I don’t know.” Tim closes his eyes, swallowing thickly. “I’m tired of running, Dick.” “Yeah. I know.” Dick squeezes Tim’s arm. “I really am glad to see you, Tim. It’s been lonely around here since you left.” Tim looks doubtful, his brows deprecatingly furrowed. “You have Damian now. You don’t need me.” The certainty in Tim’s voice breaks Dick’s heart. “I’m allowed to love more than one little brother at a time, you know. It’s not a very exclusive club. Even Jason qualifies sometimes if he’s behaving.” Tim doesn’t laugh, but he smiles softly. “I really missed you, Dick.” Dick ruffles Tim’s overgrown hair, presses a kiss to the side of his head. “Missed you too, kiddo.”
#this takes place right after tim returns to gotham during his search for bruce#i hate formatting stuff on tumblr so if the spacing's weird blame the copy/paste thing#soho writes stuff#dick grayson#nightwing#batman#tim drake#red robin#robin#batman and robin#batfamily#batfam#dc comics#fanfiction#fanfic
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Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN ー Ayato Dark [08]
Monologue
I walked all over the city,
in search of Ayato-kun.
While doing so,
the rain gradually got heavier.
At some point I realized,
that the moon shining in the night sky earlier,
had become shrouded in thick clouds,
and was no longer visible.
ー The scene starts in an alleyway
Yui: ( He’s not here either... )
( I wonder where he went...? )
ー The scene shifts to the park
Yui: ( What should I do? Maybe I should just return to the manor at once...? )
Selection
→ Go back
Yui: ( I guess I should turn back after all. I won’t get anything from running around aimlessly... )
ー Yui starts walking away
→ Search a bit longer (❦)
Yui: ( But...With a downpour like this, I’m sure he’s drenched by this point... )
...Ayato-kun...
( I’ll look around a bit longer after all. )
ー Yui continues walking around
Yui: Hm? Huh...?
( There’s someone over there... )
ー She notices Ayato
Yui: ...! Ayato-kun!
ー Yui runs up to him
Ayato: ...Chichinashi...
Yui: Thank god, I found you...
Ayato: The fuck? ...You’re here to scold me again?
Yui: I’m not...
( He’s absolutely soaked... )
Let’s go back? Everyone’s worried about you.
Ayato: Hah, as if. Don’t you think those guys are hella relieved knowin’ that I’m gone?
Especially that Reiji guy.
Yui: That’s not true...
I’m sure that Reiji-san said all of those things because he truly wants you to try your best...
He wants you to become a formidable King...
Ayato: ...A King, huh...?
God...I wonder why I was chosen?
Yui: Eh...?
Ayato: I’m talkin’ ‘bout the Old Man. What made him decide he’d give his powers to me...?
Yui: Well...
( Richter-san mentioned it as well. About what Cordelia-san found so promising about him... )
( When it comes down to it, there’s nobody you can count on more than Ayato-kun. )
Yui: Listen, Ayato-kun...This is what I think...
This whole time, no matter what happened, you were always there to save me at the very end, remember?
Ayato: ...
Yui: There might be those people who will write off your ability to fix issues based solely on your intuition as mere recklessness. But you know...
That isn’t something everyone is capable of. But you are able to pull it off...
Therefore, don’t you think that you could have some kind of special talent?
And I strongly believe that Karlheinz-san realized this as well, which is why he...
Ayato: ...Hmph. The fuck...? Don’t be spoutin’ random nonsense!
Yui: ...It’s not nonsense...!
Karlheinz-san had faith in you. I’m sure that he believed you have what it takes to become a King...
Ayato: ...The Old Man...had faith in me...?
...That’s a lie. There’s no way that Old Fart would ever trust me.
No need to try and make me feel better ‘bout myself. Deep down, you think the same thing, don’t you? Just like Reiji and the others...
That I’m simply not cut out to be a King...
Yui: ...
Ayato: I’m sick of everyone complainin’ to me the whole time.
I never asked for these powers in the first place...
Yui: ...
( I wonder when I’ve last seen him so utterly defeated...? )
( I’m sure Ayato-kun felt anxious as well after inheriting those powers... )
( But this is Ayato-kun we’re talking about. He couldn’t tell anyone about it... )
( So he put up a facade, pretending to be fine while enduring it all by himself... )
( I wonder why I didn’t realize...? )
ー Yui suddenly embraces him
*Rustle*
On certain CGs, little black roses will appear on the screen. If you click on them, you get an extra line of dialogue.
“I won’t let you go, no matter what happens. So just keep quiet and do as I say. Do you understand?”
“You’re a hundred years too early to try and help me out. ...But well, I guess it doesn���t feel bad knowin’ you’re this worried ‘bout me.”
Ayato: Chichinashi...?
Yui: I truly believe...that you have what it takes to become a wonderful King...
I know very well just how reliable you can be...
Ayato: ...
Yui: I’m not you...
So perhaps I simply cannot understand how difficult it is to have those kinds of powers but...
...But I’m here for you, at the very least. Please tell me if there’s anything I can do?
Ayato: Chichinashi...
Yui: ( ...This isn’t working. I can’t put my feelings into words very well... )
Ayato: ...Hehe. Silly girl.
Yui: Eh...?
Ayato: Hah! Why are you the one in tears? You really are a weirdo.
Yui: W-Well...!
Ayato: Oi, scoot a lil’ closer. You’re gonna get wet if you stand there.
Geez...I can’t believe you ran around in the rain. You better not catch a cold, do you hear me?
*Rustle*
Ayato: You belong to me after all. Nn...
*Smooch*
Yui: ...
( Forceful yet so sweet... )
( This is the Ayato-kun I know... )
*Rustle rustle*
Ayato: Hey, Yui...
Yui: Eh?
Ayato: Do you...truly believe that I can become a King...?
Yui: Of course! So I want you to give it everything you’ve got.
Who ever said you have to do everything perfectly from day one? I’m sure the others wouldn’t be able to do that either...
Ayato: ...
I wonder how it was for the Old Man?
Yui: Eh...?
Ayato: Did he also start out making mistakes when wielding his powers...
Or find himself wondering why he was chosen to become a King...?
Yui: Well...
Ayato: Just kidding. There’s just no way, huh? ...Hehe.
Yui: ...Maybe not. But...
Karlheinz-san was Karlheinz-san...You are you, right?
Ayato: I mean, you do have a point. I’m Yours Truly...
Monologue
Speaking those words, he cracked a small smile.
However, his smile (笑顔) still struck me as unusually sad.
I wonder why Karlheinz-san decided to leave this world,
without telling Ayato-kun anything.
If only he had given him some kind of explanation...
as to why he had chosen Ayato-kun...
Then perhaps he would never have had such a hard time like he does now.
As said thought lingers in my heart,
I gazed up at the heavily overcast sky (空).
ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー
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PART 5. THE INHERENT EROTICISM OF BUTTONING SOMEONE’S CLOTHES
SUMMARY. Todoroki Shouto was a wealthy, young CEO who inherited his father’s enterprise. You were a barista at a local cafe who wouldn’t mind some extra cash. One day, Shouto came in during an early morning shift and tipped you such a large sum of money, you were certain it had to have been an accident. To your surprise and complete pleasure: It was not.
PAIRING. ceo!todoroki shouto x barista!reader
WORD COUNT. 3.0k
GENRE. ceo/barista au, fluff, eventual smut
WARNINGS. sexual tension !! and umm sexual frustration ;p, not explicit but prob rated 16+, just read the title of this chapter BAHAHA
A/N. sorry this is coming a little later than planned ! :( but i hope the dressing room scene can make up for it u.u tysm for reading and for all the feedback! enjoy :3 xx sof
SERIES MASTERLIST
© myherowritings — all rights reserved. reposting, modifying, copying, or translating of any kind is not allowed. do not read my writing as asmr. do not plagiarize.
What were you supposed to wear to a shopping date? you asked yourself. Not that today was a date or anything. Though maybe you sort of wished it were…
The Naruhata Charity Gala was in a little over a week and Shouto would be coming over to pick you up in less than one hour and you still sat in your room with nothing but a towel on feeling more and more hopeless.
It was a strange dilemma. He met you in your work apron wearing an unflattering work shirt and work pants. And when you met up over the weekend previously, you never paid too much mind on what you would wear. In fact, you were positive he wouldn’t even care how you looked. So why was it such a big deal to you now?
Probably because of your recent admission of your growing feelings towards him, you thought crossly.
In your defense, it wasn’t like it was your fault! Right? Seeing someone everyday… Wanting to see someone everyday… Texting regularly about the most random things, having the most banal objects you saw throughout the day remind you of something Shouto did or said… With all those occurrences it would’ve been practically impossible to not start crushing on him!
Time passed as you stared at your ceiling blankly. If you kept this up, he was bound to show up in your house and find you half-naked. (Now that you mentioned it, that didn’t sound like the worst idea. But it wasn’t something you’d randomly spring upon someone.)
“Get up, Y/N!” you scolded yourself, rolling off your bed and heading towards your closet.
In the end, you ended up settling for another variation of your usual go-to outfit and called it a day. It happened to be perfect timing since, by the time you finished getting ready, you got a new message on your phone.
Shouto: Parked in front of your place
Shouto: Sorry I’m a little early. You can take your time getting ready :)
Y/N: it’s okay i’m ready now!!
After hitting send, you put your shoes on, gathering your belongings you wanted to bring with you, and headed out the door. Excited to hang out with Shouto again, you walked with a skip in your step down the path until you reached his car.
“Hi!” You waved through his half-opened, tinted window. To no one’s surprise, his car was a sleek black color with dark, tinted windows, and gold details along the sides. If it didn’t look so oddly sexy you would’ve laughed at how cutely dorky he was for matching his car with his credit card. “This is one hot car.”
He turned his head to the side when you entered the passenger’s seat. “Should I turn the AC higher?”
“Huh— Oh!” You stifled a giggle when you processed the pun he made. “You’re funny, Shouto.”
He only looked a little confused. “Thank you.”
The interior of his car was no less—for lack of better term—sexy than the outside. Leather seats, a large screen for the radio and carplay, and the dashboard and side doors lit up a nice blue color.
“Pretty!” you complimented, poking at the colorful light.
“Want to pick a color?”
Your eyes widened. “It can change colors?!”
Shouto nodded.
“Can it be pink?” you asked intently.
“Light pink or hot pink?”
“Light.”
He swiftly obliged and with a hit of a touchscreen button, the interior lighting changed from blue to pastel pink.
“Green!”
It turned green.
“Orange!”
Cue the orange.
“Purple?”
Purple.
Once you were thoroughly satisfied with Shouto showing you the whole color selection (you were almost embarrassed to admit it kept you entertained for a good ten minutes), you settled on a bright turquoise that reminded you of the color of his left eye.
“Ooh, this color! My favorite,” you said simply, giving him a wide smile.
A faint blush dusted his cheeks as he developed a sudden interest in adjusting his rearview mirror. “Hm.”
Shouto drove the rest of the way in a comfortable silence, occasionally asking how your week was outside of work and what type of outfit you wanted to wear so he could have a better idea on where to take you.
“Did you eat?” he suddenly asked when he hit the next stoplight, one hand holding the wheel and the other resting comfortably on the gear shift.
His hands looked nice and slender and soft to the touch. Pretty hands, you thought but shook yourself out of it because you could go down a rabbit hole of examining his hands and going into detail about them.
You remembered the single, measly granola bar you had due to your rush getting ready. “I didn’t really eat yet, no. Did you?”
He shook his head and pulled into a food plaza with lots of stores to choose from. The two of you agreed on a noodle restaurant that apparently had some of the best cold soba (once you learned it was his favorite food, you wanted to be able to have some with him and today was the perfect opportunity to do just that) and promptly headed to the location.
In the shop, a waiter sat the two of you down at a dimly lit booth with the perfect amount of ambience that if someone were to casually look over, they might even mistake this outing as a date.
You grinned at the thought.
“Excited for the soba?” asked Shouto, examining the smile on your face thoughtfully.
That’s not why you were smiling, but it was close enough. “Mhm. And the udon. You can never go wrong with noodles!”
Yes, you got both udon and soba. But in your defense, where else would the fun in life be if not in sugary sweets and carbs?
As the two of you waited for your main dishes, you ate some fish cakes and edamame while talking about the ways in which capitalism could be dismantled. Rather sexy of him, if you did say so yourself.
Before you knew it, you were done with your meal and headed back into his car to go fancy-people shopping. On the remainder of the ride, you asked yourself what color you should pick that would match well with both you and Shouto. After all, nothing said a cute couple who totally liked each other going on a totally real date to a gala like color-coordinated outfits, right?
He parked in front of a street of buildings with a dark glass reaching from ceiling to floor with security guards at the door. Just standing near it made you feel fancy.
“This is a place my sister told me she liked,” he said, leading you to the store front with his hand on the small of your back to guide you. “I hope you’ll find something to your liking.”
You tried your best not to pay too much attention to the warmth you felt both on your back and your stomach from the fuzzy feelings that spread.
“Hello, welcome!” the both of you were greeted as you walked through the doors. The interior of the store was lined with designer dresses, some long, some short, and all incredibly stunning. There were only a few other patrons in the store, but all of them looked so elegant as they tried on their dresses. “It’s so lovely to see you again Mr. Todoroki.”
Shouto nodded subtly. “Hello. This is Y/N, my date to the gala who’ll need your assistance today.”
“Hi!” you chimed in at his cue. “Nice to meet you.”
The worker smiled and made her way over to you. “And you as well. I’m Masuda and I’ll do my best to make sure you leave the store satisfied with your purchase! Did you have a particular style or perhaps color in mind?”
“Umm,” you said sheepishly, looking around the wide variety of clothings and unsure where to start. “I’m not too sure. It’s my first time going to one of these things so maybe something comfortable, but also still...fancy?” You scratched the back of your neck. “Does that even exist?”
“Of course— Just have to find something that feels comfortable to you.” She told you to hold on one moment as she disappear into the rows of fabric.
As Masuda collected some starter dresses for you to try on, a customer walked by with bags of clothes in her hands, her gaze lingering on Shouto, though neither of you paid her much mind.
“In this setting, you look almost fit to be a sugar daddy,” you said jokingly, looking around in awe at the sophisticated yet lavish dresses. “You take all your sugar babies here?”
“Only the ones I really like,” he teased back. His voice was deadpan but there was the telltale hints of a smirk on his face to let you know he was only messing with you.
The door chimed to signal that a customer left and by then Masuda had returned with bundles of fabric draped on her arm. She led you away in a hurry and you hesitantly looked back at Shouto who followed in a safe distance. Seeing your moment of panic, he gave you an encouraging smile that somehow was enough to ease a significant fraction of your nerves. This may be new and confusing territory, but at least he was here to help you through it.
Masuda set a dressing room up for you—it was one of those rooms in the middle of the store with curtains that reached the ceiling and mirrors all around—and placed a bunch of outfits she thought would suit your taste. It reminded you of when a bride would go wedding dress shopping with their family. When you had enough outfits for the first round, she told Shouto to sit down on a leather seat in front of your dressing room while he waited for you to try the different dresses on.
In a way, it felt oddly intimate: Shouto sitting just a few feet in front of you as you undressed, only separated by the veil of a curtain. Would he offer to help button the back of your dress up, fingers brushing against your bare skin? The thought made you feel almost hot inside as you changed out of your street clothes and into the first dress.
Unfortunately for you, this dress had no such difficult buttons to reach.
“How’s it look?” you asked shyly as you emerged from the dressing room.
The dress was pretty and didn’t feel uncomfortable to walk in, but there wasn’t any sort of attachment you felt towards it. In other words, it was simply...meh.
Shouto looked up from his phone to take in the sight of you. He smiled. “You look amazing as always.”
“You think so?” You spun around and curtseyed jokingly and he chuckled. “I don’t think it’s bad, but I’m not sure if it’s the right one.”
“We’ll be here until you find the right one you want, then. Take your time, Y/N.”
His voice was normally on the deeper side, but it sounded even more sensual and gravelly at this very moment. You felt goosebumps on your arms and it wasn’t just because of the sleeveless dress you currently had on.
“T-Thanks, Shouto,” you murmured, turning around and walking back into the changing room to hide the look on your face. You didn’t even know what kind of look you had on your face, but you knew it was one that might give too much away.
It wasn’t fair that he had to be so sweet and caring and thoughtful and handsome and rich… Most guys you met barely fit into one of those criteria, let alone all five. (Sure, the last two weren’t necessary in your opinion, but you couldn’t deny they were a nice bonus.) It was too bad you had no clue how he felt about you.
There were moments where he felt flirty and teasing, like maybe he viewed you in a more-than-friends way. But other times he was so polite and proper and you couldn’t help but wonder if he was just being nice because that’s simply the sort of person he was to everyone.
While you were trying to sort through all your thoughts, you completely forgot to change into a new dress the whole time you were in here.
You saw a shadow at the floor of the curtain before a voice said, “Y/N? Are you okay in there?”
Jumping at the sound, you scurried to put the next dress on, a blue one with almost translucent fabric and a delicate neckline. Judging from the proximity of Shouto’s voice and the shadow of his shoes, he was right next to you as you changed.
“I’m okay!” you managed, hoping you didn’t sound as wobbly as you felt. You held the dress closed at the back, fumbling with the fastens. “I just, ah, needed help buttoning this one up.”
A light ruffle on the curtain then a pause. “Should I...come in and help?”
Your eyes widened, not expecting him to actually offer to button it up like you fantasized earlier. You fully thought he might called the worker to aide you just so he wouldn’t risk making you uncomfortable. (Not that he would’ve. At all.)
“I apologize,” he said somewhat tensely after you didn’t respond. “That was indecent of me—”
“No, no!” you said profusely, poking your head out of the curtain while holding the fabric at the front of your dress to your chest. You tilted your chin to meet his gaze with a determined one of your own. “I’d love your help, Shouto.”
With a dusting of pink coloring his cheeks, he nodded and entered your dressing room. “This dress is a nice color on you.” His voice was loud against the silence.
Shouto ran his hand down the length of your spine and then up to unfold the column of buttons on your dress that curved inwards at your movement, his knuckles grazing against your skin like lightning striking water. You jolted at the sudden feeling but he didn’t remove his touch when he felt it.
“Sorry.” His voice was low, almost like a whisper. “Was just getting the buttons out.”
“N-No worries!”
His fingers began working on the bottom-most button at your lower back as he applied a steady pressure on the base of your spine to control the motion. Shouto slowly began his way up, fingertips cold to the touch. But you knew that wasn’t the only reason you felt yourself shiver. As he fastened the dainty buttons with immense concentration (much more concentration than was actually needed to fasten buttons, you were sure), you felt the heat of his breath tickling the back of your neck. You almost couldn’t keep yourself from arching your back in a mixture of anticipation and delight at his constant touch.
When he finished the last button, Shouto let one hand rest on your hip, grasping the fabric between his fingertips to examine its silken texture. Your breath caught in your throat as you stepped back and bumped into his chest, but he was already there to steady you.
With his arm on your waist and your back leaning against his chest, you made eye contact through the mirror in front of you. You weren’t sure if the pounding you felt was from your heart or his or a combination of both.
There was something almost erotic about holding each others’ gaze in the mirror after Shouto just helped you dress, the two of you still not letting the other go despite the task being complete.
“The dress… You look gorgeous,” he said, not taking his eyes off you for one moment.
You nodded slowly. It did look amazing on you. And it was breathable and soft. (Plus, Shouto liked it, which made you happier than you’d care to admit.) “The only downside would be I need help getting into it.”
“We could get ready together so it’s no issue.”
“I’d...also need help getting out of it.”
You held your breath as his eyes darkened, his grip on your waist tightening ever so slightly in a way that made you curve your back before you remembered you were flush against Shouto and he could feel even the most subtle of movements coming from your body. But by the time you stopped yourself, it was too late. He already felt it and you wanted more.
His voice was hoarse. “I could help you with that too.”
Instead of beginning to unbutton the dress like part of you thought he would, he surprised you by spinning you around to face him, your shoulder blades pressed against the cool glass of the mirror and your palms lingering on the muscles of his warm chest. The contrast of the cold glass and Shouto’s body heat left a shiver down your spine.
“And how do you plan to help take off my dress when you can’t even see the buttons?” you said challengingly, a smirk on your face despite knowing full well your body was showcasing just how affected you were by this situation. By Shouto.
He tilted his head to the side in response to your daring tone, hands swiftly finding their way to your back and unbuttoning the top five buttons. It wasn’t enough to completely expose your breasts, but it was enough to loosen the fabric at the neckline in a way that made you gasp.
“Seems doable to me,” he commented.
You tugged him down slightly by the collar of his shirt. “I don’t quite believe you. Maybe you should prove it.”
A guttural noise sounded from the back of his throat as he cupped your jaw and leaned in closer. You inched forward, eager to meet his lips. But before they could touch, a knock came from the wall next to the curtain, causing the two of you to freeze in your spots, bodies pressed against each other in an intimate flush.
“Hello, Y/N?” said Masuda cheerfully, blissfully ignorant about what was about to happen in a public dressing room in the middle of the store. “How are the dresses coming along? Did you like any?”
“Ah, actually…” you trailed off, exchanging frustrated but amused glances with Shouto. “I think we’ll take this one.”
a/n: so...mirror sex/sex in a dressing room as a bonus chapter? u.u why yes of course. i’m one step ahead; did u even have to ask? LMAO and hm i wonder if y/n’s fEeLiNGs~ are reciprocated skfkfkdg ALSO THEY WERE SO CLOSE TO KISSING BUT DIDN’T I CRY hopefully the wait will be worth it ;3
what to expect in the next part:
GALA TIMEEEE
yes y/n finally gets the fancy candy they so desired
we get to see shouto’s sexy penthouse
shouto says eat the rich >:c
#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bnha#mha#bnha imagines#bnha fanfiction#mha imagines#mha fanfiction#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#todoroki shouto#todoroki shouto x reader#todoroki shoto x reader#todoroki x reader#shouto x reader#shoto x reader#todoroki shoto#bnha scenarios#mha scenarios#todoroki imagines#bnha todoroki#bnha fluff#bnha x you#bnha x y/n#shoto todoroki x reader#shoto todoroki
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If your still taking requests can I request a death note oneshot nsfw were it’s after Light’s fathers death and the reader doesn’t like Light in fact hates Him but starts to feel sorry for him and later that day decides to visit his apartment to help him deal with his grief and ask if there is anything she can do to help him and light subtly implies that she can help him by sleeping with him and the reader is tempted to but doesn’t want to because she remembers she dislikes him and he has a girlfriend but light eventually persuades her into it ?
Just this once?
pairing: light yagami x f!reader
wc: 1.4k
cw: infidelity (light cheats on misa), dubcon, coercion, reader is L’s little sister, not proofread (lmk if i missed anything!!!)
hi!! sorry this took forever, i took a lil break from writing. i tried my best to stick to the request but idk how well i did lmao but even so, i hope you like it!!!
Your dead-set focus is suddenly ripped from you as the familiar noise of the task force headquarters’ door creaking open pulls your eyes away from the bright computer screen. To your displeasure, the new presence in the room is none other than Light Yagami.
“Oh, Light! I thought we agreed you didn’t have to come in today?” An uncharacteristically soft-spoken Matsuda greets.
“Yeah, but I guess my father’s passing only fueled me to get to the bottom of this even more.” Light states.
Being L’s sister, you’ve inherited the black-haired boy’s suspicion of Light. After all, you were the only person in the world that L trusted with his entire heart and soul. Those countless times you’ve stayed up together throwing theories about the Kira case back and forth, only for you and the night itself to hear.
Though your brother was undeniably a bit smarter than you, you weren’t stupid either. With everything L had theorized about Light’s true identity, it’s hard for you to write off L’s death as a coincidence. The timelines just seemed to line up too perfectly.
Everything on top of the fact that because of your investigation work on the Kira case you were barely even given time to mourn the loss of your precious older brother, a heavy dislike of the brown-haired man festered in you.
Even so, you can’t help but feel sympathetic towards him today. After all, it’s true that you know what it feels like to lose a close family member too.
“Hey, Light,” his name feels sour on your tongue, “if you want I can take the heavy lifting today, don’t stress, alright?”
His eyes meet yours, and you take note that they look even more dead than usual.
“It’s okay, Y/N, no need to worry.”
—
No need to worry.
Well, you did worry. All day in fact.
You hate yourself for feeling so empathetic towards the man who you suspect of being behind the killing of your very own brother.
But here you are now, about to knock on Light’s apartment door with a small bouquet of tulips in your left hand. Nothing special, you told yourself, just something to show that you care at least a little.
As you raise your right knuckles to the wooden surface, the door suddenly swings inward.
“Oh hello, Y/N. Pretty flowers you’ve got there.” Light points at the objects in your grip.
That’s it. That’s another thing that you hate about him. How he always seems to be one step ahead of you in even the smallest things. How it feels like he always knows what you’re thinking. It’s almost like he’s watching you sometimes, for fuck’s sake!
“These are for you, actually.”
“Really?” he fakes a smug expression, making you cringe, “Thank you so much!”
“It’s nothing. Feel better soon.”
You turn to leave, but Light’s hand catches your shoulder.
“Wait. Before you leave, can you come in for a second?”
“Oh uh… sure? Why?”
You receive no response as Light silently motions you onto his couch. A nervous pit grows in the bottom of your stomach.
“So uh… what do you need me for?” You ask apprehensively.
“Just want to talk. It feels like forever since we’ve actually sat down together and had a conversation, you know?”
You let out a sigh of relief you didn’t know you were keeping in. “Yeah, it has been a while.”
Yet another awkward silence passes. The sheer quietness seems very strange to you for a moment until it hits you.
“Hey, where’s Misa? Is she out at a shoot or something?”
“So observant.” Light chuckles, and with the tone he puts on, you’re not sure if he’s being sarcastic or not, “Yes, she’s filming a commercial for Miho Skincare. Or at least that’s what she told me before she ran out the door.”
“Oh, I see.” You bite your lip, unsure of how to continue the conversation, “Do you want me to put the flowers in a vase for you?” You ask, picking up the tulips from the coffee table.
Light moves his hand to your thigh in a smooth motion, catching you very off guard so that you nearly drop the bouquet. You hate the fact that blood rushes to your cheeks.
“No need. But there is something else I want from you, if I’m going to be blunt.” His eyes pierce directly through you. You feel naked under his gaze.
Fuck, as many negative feelings you harbour for the man in front of you, you can’t deny he’s attractive in all sense of the word. You know what he’s asking for. It’s plainly clear even just from the lust blooming in his irises.
And it’s then when you realize how touch-starved you are. You’ve been using every available hour of your life on the Kira case, of course you hadn’t had time for any kind of relationship.
So you don’t stop him from inching closer. One of his hands sliding towards the inside of your thigh while the other pushes a piece of your hair from your face. His captivating eyes flutter shut and you’re about to give into his touch when you remember the girl you had been talking about just a moment earlier.
“Wait. Misa.” You whisper simply.
“She won’t be home for hours. And you want to make me feel better, do you not? I’m just asking for one more thing in addition to those flowers you gave me, hm?” He borderline growls into your ear. You would be lying if you said it didn’t turn you on a little.
Without waiting for an answer, Light crashes his lips onto yours. The kiss is hungry, like he wants to waste no time with you. Admittedly, you still feel a little uneasy about all of this, Misa’s face—sweet as candy—beaming at you in your mind as her boyfriend sucks on your tongue.
You feel around each other’s bodies, unbuttoning anything you feel to rid yourselves of your clothing. It all goes so fast, and before you know it, you’re both in your undergarments. Light’s got you lying beneath him with your knees pressed to your chest. He reaches to pull your grey cotton panties to the side.
Suddenly, the peppy blonde girl inside your head once again appears, and you realize what you’re doing.
“Hang on, Light. I’m not too sure about this anymore…” You weakly tell him, pushing his hands away from your most sensitive area.
“Hm? But you promised you’d help me feel better.” Light throws uncharacteristic puppy eyes your way. He points to the wet patch that had formed on the centre of your panties, “And look, you want it too, right? Just this once? Please?”
It’s true, you had come here to make him happier. So why should you go back on it now? You criticize yourself, wondering how you could ever be so inconsiderate—to a coworker who just lost his father, too!
So you nod your head in coerced approval towards the man on top of you, who then in turn wasted no time pulling his cock out from his boxers.
Without warning, or any prep whatsoever, Light pushes the head of his cock into your cunt. The stretch burns, and you’re left wondering if it’s just because you haven’t gotten laid in quite a while, or if his cock is just that fat.
“Light!” You whine in slight protest, “You’re too big… hurts…”
He only hums in response, pushing himself further into you, “Sorry, little one, this cunt is just so tight, I can’t help myself. Fuck-“
Light starts a rhythm, watching his cock sink in into you over and over again. He notes how each time he pulls out, a sheen of both your slick, and even some blood coats it. Must’ve just been too big for your little cunny, he guesses.
The pain of the stretch slowly turns into pleasure and you relax into Light’s touch. You throw your hands into his surprisingly soft brunette locks as he pounds into your sweet spot.
You wonder if L is watching you right now. He must be so disappointed in his little sister, moaning and creaming so sweetly for the very same man he thought he had taught you to be wary of, the man who made the world a living hell.
#zap⚡️ is typing...#zap⚡️.answers#lights.⚡️#death note smut#death note x reader#cw coercion#cw manipulation#cw dubcon#cw cheating#light yagami x reader#light x reader#light yagami smut
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hello! I’ve seen some debate as to whether the 2nd meant allies in general would bolster izuku and although I do think that’s true (ofc any sort of support system that he lets himself rely on would bolster him) I feel like if that was what was meant it would’ve been made clearer? maybe instead of just katsuki showing up, the final panel would’ve had several students burst onto the scene. what are your thoughts?
agreed. and incidentally this is another big reason why it's not Toga. if it was her then Horikoshi wouldn't have devoted any time to OFA II's little hype speech. it just makes it kind of pointless, unless this whole time we've been sleeping on Toga's hidden ability to bolster Deku lmao.
but anyways, yeah. and I mean, Two's commentary here is really just acknowledgement of something we've long since known already. Kacchan is the one who will ultimately be able to reach Deku. we don't actually need a piece of dialogue to tell us this, because the manga has been showing it to us since day one. his resume is fucking stacked. I mean, let's go through it.
he is mean.
I love this you guys. I honest to god love it. because the thing is, if you ask anyone what Kacchan's absolute worst quality is, this would be the obvious answer, right? "he's an asshole" lmao.
but that's exactly what we need right now!! someone who's not afraid to tell it like it is, and won't try to sugarcoat things. someone who's not afraid to argue back and risk hurting someone's feelings. because right now Deku is walking all over anyone who can't do that. All Might tries to feed him lunch and he's like "nah I'm good, anyways bye." Endeavor tries to tell him to rest and he's all "I'm fine" and fucking hangs up the phone. nuh uh. enough of that. what we need is someone who will call him out on his shit. "hah!? don't tell me you're fine when it's obvious to anyone you can barely stand on your own two feet, dumbass."
he is stubborn.
kind of ties into the other thing, but yeah. right now we need a bullheaded asshole who won't take no for an answer if he thinks he's right. good luck trying to sweet talk your way out of this one, Deku.
he understands the situation.
this one is important, because in fairness, simply standing in front of Deku and saying "you shall not pass" isn't gonna be enough to actually accomplish anything here. ultimately he's going to have to be able to reason with Deku too. and so in that respect, it certainly doesn't hurt that Kacchan is someone who understands the OFA situation as well as anyone, and has always had clear judgment about it. he understands the threat of AFO ("they all died young"), and he understands the burden of All Might's legacy. he knows what Deku is dealing with, and that's going to give him an edge when it comes to finding that elusive-yet-critical talk no jutsu knockout blow.
he's been where Deku is now.
Kacchan knows a thing or two about burdens. granted, they've more often than not been ones that he's put on himself, but that didn't make them any less heavy. Deku right now is struggling not just with his feelings of responsibility, but also with all of the misplaced guilt that's feeding into it. AFO is targeting him. if innocent people get caught in the crossfire then that's on him. every minute that AFO stays out there getting stronger and causing more chaos is all on him, because he hasn't defeated him yet. and so on and so forth.
and Katsuki knows what that's like. because he blamed himself for what happened to All Might. that feeling of "if I'd only been stronger" is one that he's intimately acquainted with. that feeling of blaming yourself, of not being able to look someone you care about in the eye because you think it's your fault they got hurt. this is something he knows. this is a road he's already been down. and so if Deku tries to pull any "you don't understand" nonsense, Kacchan is uniquely situated to immediately shoot that shit right down.
he's immune to low blows.
lol I keep thinking of all the different counterarguments that Deku could make, and all the different ways in which Kacchan is perfectly equipped to handle them. anyway, so this particular thing is a very recent development, but very fortunately timed. so as we all know, Kacchan was a first class dick to Deku during their childhood. something which Deku, with his abnormally kind and forgiving nature, has never once confronted Kacchan about, even though he would have absolutely had the right. but anyway, so here's the thing though -- right now I fully believe that Deku can and will do or say just about anything in order to get Kacchan and the others to leave. and that includes hurting them in order to save them. so it would not surprise me at all if Deku goes as far as to throw Katsuki's old, cruel, selfish behavior back in his face as part of a last-ditch effort to get him to back down. desperate times and all that.
and maybe there was a time when that actually would have worked. but here's the other thing -- we know something Deku doesn't. namely, that Kacchan has recently leveled up emotionally and has finally unlocked his atonement quest. he finally understands that it's not all about him. which means that it doesn't matter even if Deku pulls out the big guns. he may hurt his feelings, but he's not going to scare him off, because Kacchan's focus right now is on atonement, not forgiveness. he's not doing this for a pat on the head. he's doing it because it's the right thing to do. and no amount of insults will be able to sway him from that.
he learned from the best.
I said this in another post a couple of weeks back, but yeah. Angsty Nomad Deku has nothing on early Kacchan in terms of pushing people away. early Kacchan was the motherfucking king of pushing peeps away. if you so much as LOOKED at this kid in such a way that SUGGESTED you might even be THINKING about possibly trying to save him, he would straight up throw a ten-year hissy fit lmao. Deku's "All Might, you don't have to tag along anymore"s ain't got SHIT on all of Kacchan's "STAY BACK DEKU"s and "I'D RATHER LOSE!!!"s and "OMFG HOW DARE YOU BE THE ONLY PERSON TO TRY TO SAVE ME FROM THIS RAMPAGING SLUDGE MAN WHO'S ABOUT TO SUFFOCATE ME TO DEATH"s. Kacchan is the undisputed goat here lol.
but anyway, so what this means is that he has accumulated a whole HOST of iconic lines and fateful parallels which he can throw back in Deku's face at a moment's notice. and the best part is that he learned it all from THIS EXACT MOTHERFUCKER, RIGHT HERE. what is Deku even gonna do!! argue against his own past actions?? "well, uh, I guess now that you mention it I should have just sat back and watched you die all those times" OH REALLY?? YOU DON'T SAY. THAT SOUNDS SO CONVINCING.
and so guess what, Deku -- if Kacchan was worth saving, then you're worth saving too. it's an ironclad argument. congratulations son you played yourself.
he always wins.
okay so real talk, we all know that what's really driving Deku right now is his fear of losing people. he's helpless against that. he saw Kacchan get stabbed right before his eyes and it fucked him up. he saw all these other people getting hurt and killed because he couldn't save them, and he straight up could not deal with those emotions at all. he's scared. he's more afraid of that happening again than of anything else. and AFO knows that, and that's why he's resorted to his current tactics, which have isolated Deku even further and caused him to push even All Might away.
what Deku is missing right now, and what he needs to have restored, is trust. trust is the antidote to fear. and when you're as scared as Deku is, it takes an extraordinary amount of assurance in order to ease those fears. basically you don't want to place your faith in anything less than an absolutely sure thing.
but Kacchan is exactly that. this is the exact type of situation that Kacchan's "aiming for the top" overkill confidence was made for. he's the one who never loses!! the hero who's going to surpass all other heroes!! Deku inherited All Might's compassion, but Kacchan inherited his determination. Kacchan is someone who brings reassurance. his confidence is unwavering. and in the end, I think it will be strong enough to pull even Deku back out from the darkness.
he is strong.
Kacchan is Deku's rival in every sense of the word, and I fully believe he's capable of matching him step for step even now. and so Deku can try to push him away, but Kacchan is capable of withstanding that force and staying his ground. Deku can try to run, but Kacchan still has him matched for speed. and as a last resort, Deku can even try to defeat him -- but Kacchan won't ever concede to defeat.
and all of this ties back into what I was saying about trust. because Kacchan is strong. strong enough not to die. strong enough to live. strong enough to not make others worry about him. and that's what Deku so desperately needs right now in order to finally let go of his fears. Deku needs someone who can get him to trust in others again, and to do that, he has to be able to trust in their strength.
and last but not least...
he has a secret weapon up his sleeve.
several, as a matter of fact. his hero name reveal. his apology, if he chooses to give it now (though I could see him waiting for a more sincere moment, rather than whipping it out now when it could be misconstrued as a manipulation tactic). but perhaps most importantly...

never underestimate the power of an iconic role reversal. because that's what I'm getting at here, if it wasn't clear lol. this probably would have worked better if I had a picture of him actually reaching out to Deku. but I mean, that's kind of the point lol. I don't have one because he hasn't done it yet. BUT CAN YOU IMAGINE. good luck withstanding that, Deku.
so yeah. look at all that. he really is a one-man Deku-saving army. which is not to say that the other kids won't have a part to play as well, or that it's not important for them to be there, because it is. but as far as the lead role goes, it's Kacchan. like that astronaut meme guy says. always has been.
oh and as a bonus he was smart enough to finally leave the mask at home today lol. LET DEKU SEE THE SINCERITY IN YOUR EYES. YESSSSSSS.
#bnha 318#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#bakudeku#bnha meta#bakugou meta#deku meta#bnha#boku no hero academia#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#bnha manga spoilers#makeste reads bnha#asks#anon asks
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Long Fall Into Oblivion (Ezra x reader)
(header by sirtadcooper - check out the whole beautiful set here.)
Rating: Mature.
Pairing: Ezra (post-Prospect film) x f!reader
Warnings: Non-explicit sex. Some swears maybe (think there’s a f*ck in there somewhere, my GOODNESS). A lot of gooey, syrupy, soft fluffety fluff. Author attempts at writing Ezra dialogue. A lot of chewy prose.
A/N: I can’t believe I’m posting this, but here goes. I love Ezra. He is a man of questionable morality and an insufferable tongue and I really shouldn’t. But I really do. I just wanted to give him a try. I’ve softened him up here, putting a few years on him so maybe he’s fluffed up some since the events in the film. Also I just ignored the fade or assumed that aurelac mining was still happening because scarcity/demand. Doesn’t matter. Just wanted to go exploring.
Summary: You take a job as an aurelac prospecting trainee and Ezra shows you the ropes. You’re gonna fall in love with him. That’s it. That’s the whole thing.
TAGLIST: you can always request to be on the taglist for this or any of my work. If you’d like to be on taglists for upcoming fic, please sign up here –> TAGLIST
MASTERLIST
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Bakhroma is one of the smallest gas giants in the sector, but as you stand on the surface of the Green Moon, it dominates the entire horizon, pulling your focus, threatening to engulf everything around it. You almost feel sorry for the lush moon as you walk through its undergrowth, so gentle and full of beauty, destined many years after you’re gone to give its life to her.
A moon is an orbiting admirer, and what is an orbit but a long fall to oblivion?
There’s a painful, sour ache in your heart as you walk back to the camp in twilight, watching the back of Ezra’s helmet bob along in front of you. You’d spent two days digging that claim only to find the weakest aurelac nest you’ve seen yet, only three viable nodes. You’d dug through one of them by accident and completely melted another like an incompetent fool. Kevva’s ass, you were such a disappointment. Three months in the Green and you still can’t cut a blister out properly. Not even once.
Ezra’s shoulders are wide and tense, his one hand splayed out as he walks, running over the tops of the tall ferns, catching one every now and then only to rip the top away, twirl it between his gloved fingers and toss it impatiently aside.
The other two members of your team headed out on a sling this morning, another two will be arriving in a few days. And you wonder if Ez regrets just not cutting his losses and leaving with them, or at least sending you back in exchange for another kip.
You think about shifting through the comm channels, hoping that he’s chattering away in one of them, switched without your knowledge, but it’s a lost cause. You can hear him breathing on the channel between you. It’s not often Ezra has nothing to say.
________________
You thought your father was leaving you an inheritance. It’s not the reason you took care of him through his illness, but you’d dropped everything to be back home with him through his final months. In a way, it was a blessing, a reason to quit the Dasha factory and the terrible working conditions there, come back home and focus on your dad, relive good memories, just spend time. The reconnection lifted your heart, but his death sank it low again. When you learned he had nothing to leave you but a small house and some old vehicles, you sold what you could and traded in the rest.
Then you had nothing. No family, no job, little savings, questionable future. It almost broke your spirit. But the last few months with your father rekindled your love of him as he told you about his years in the Fringe, mining and prospecting. And your heart had said, “what the hell, let’s try that.” So you listened.
It took some time to track down the right inroads, but you were able to find some ads for prospecting teams, in particular those who were willing to take on members in training for a re-distributed cut. With all provisions included--other than suit and gear, which your father’s inheritance neatly covered--it seemed like just as good of a deal as any, and an adventure to boot.
But the reality was, every team you met with was full of hardened men, and while you were not a soft Central woman, you also weren’t overly versed in weaponry and didn’t know if you could defend yourself out in the Fringe against attack if things got crusty.
You were just about ready to admit defeat when you walked into yet another conference bunker and found your match. The first thing you noticed was that he was standing when you arrived, waiting for you politely rather than manspread at the table. Second were his eyes. Deep, brown, and sad. Maybe sad was the wrong word, certainly it seemed by the lines in his face, possibly by the missing arm, that he’d seen enough sadness, but toward you, it read more as concern. You wouldn’t know it until later when he confessed his feelings about this first meeting, but he was worried you wouldn’t choose him. Ezra had a hell of a time hiring partners. He may have been one of the longest-working aurelac diggers out there, but young kippers saw his greying beard and seasoned diggers saw his lacking arm and they all tended to turn around and walk out before he even said hello. So he’d tried to put himself out there as a trainer, show that he had something more to offer.
It didn’t hurt his feelings when you admitted to him later that those qualities were exactly why you chose him. He seemed the opposite of threatening. And his eyes were bright when he smiled at you. With his thrumming baritone and his Fringe twang and his mixed deck of mosaic words, he had a way of speaking that felt like a fluffy blanket curling around you, your brain vibrating with comfort at every new monologue. He was eccentric and perhaps a little jarringly rough in his humor at times, but there was something about him that you trusted immediately, even though you’d come to learn later you probably shouldn’t have if you were being overly cautious.
Not that your judgement ever came to detriment. Not that he ever proved you wrong that way. Not when it came to you. But the man was dangerous when he had to be in a way you hadn’t initially picked up on.
________________
You hadn’t been out in the Green two weeks before you looked up from the bottom of a dig hole to see Ezra standing over you with a thrower.
“You get down and you stay down, understand?”
“Ez? What--”
“I said stay down! Do not make me waste words on mere repetition!” The fuzzy blanket of his voice replaced suddenly by a snarling, snapping brush wolf, a quick change hitting you like a slap in the ear.
There’d been pops and whizzes as shots rang through and you did as your trainer said, face down, the view of your visor giving you nothing but dirt. Your helmet was a chorus of quick breathing from both of you and sweat rolled down your neck as you begged the eyes of Kevva to look down upon your partner. When the crossfire faded, you’d heard Ezra stalk away. Then there were a couple more shots. Then more footsteps returning.
“You are permitted to stand, trinket. All is well as it can be for us. But not so much for our dearly departed friends.” These words were as soothing as much as his previous ones had burned, and he simply went back to working at the dig at hand as if he’d just come back from taking a leak. It wasn’t until you left the site that evening that you tramped past two rotting raiders, gaudily outfitted with broken face shields, left to let the Green take them.
Ezra whistled as he stepped over them, stopping only to harvest their filters and munition rods, which he tossed your way to stow in your pack, and then continued lazily down the path toward camp. Just another day on the job.
He may be a little peculiar and not someone to trifle with, he may have just killed two people without remorse or further comment, but his lack of reassuring words told you that this was just part of the deal. You wear the suit, you use the air scrubber in the tent, you follow the landing pod instructions as written, and you defend yourself against those who wish to harm you. Survival by any and all means is paramount, mundane, and something he has no qualms with on any level.
There was something deep down inside of you that instinctually pulled you to follow him, not just down the literal path before you, but whatever path Ezra chose to wander.
________________
Before you’d left the station with him, he’d taken you to a thrower range to gauge your skill which was decent in theory, but dismal compared with what he could do. No matter, he still patiently taught you how to properly clean and charge a weapon and the best way to breathe and pull the trigger; “like you’re taking hold of a man’s...well... Just go easy and firm.” He suggested you should come and practice every day before lift off and then hope to Kevva that you didn’t have to rely too heavily on it.
“If I find myself in a coffin of my own suit, then feel free to defend yourself as a final means of preservation. Otherwise, when it comes down to shots fired, best to let me do the dirty work. Might as well keep the blood where the blood has been.”
You’d been a little nervous about sharing a freighter pod alone with him, but Ezra was...well, not so much a gentleman as just a comfortable soul.
He always waited until you were hungry to eat, thinking it rude to eat alone in front of you. He never moved around the pod while you were sleeping, content to keep still with a book in his cot. And if you couldn’t sleep, he was always willing to read to you from whatever impossibly dense old world classic he was digging through for the umpteenth time, letting his voice come up from the deeps and pull you gently under. If you asked permission to turn on the radio, he’d ask you “why Isn’t it on yet, woman,” quietly tolerating your taste in harsh and gleeful babblecore pshcyopop. In the later days of the journey, he’d even come to dance with you from time to time, although both of you were dismal at it and ended up with you in a fit of giggles. It was a sure-fire way to cure a case of the pouts you carried through from the morning fitness sessions when he beat you at pushups. Again.
When it came to privacy in the tight space, he had a habit of turning away without having to be asked or stopping his stream of talk when you went to change clothes, just happily chattering away until you called the all clear. Although he was not squeamish about his own state of undress, should you happen to catch it by accident. While he was respectful of your privacy, he seemed to need none of his own, but neither did he flaunt anything. You might look up from studying the flight manual to notice he was changing into a fresh pair of compression pants, tugging them on haphazardly with one hand, more concerned with telling you the overwhelmingly disgusting manufacturing process of Bits Bars than his own ass hanging out where you might see it. At least he always changed facing away from you which was a kindness.
Until it wasn’t.
After you realized you’d fallen quietly in love with him--a sudden, soft moment on the Green--then you’d admit only privately to yourself that you wouldn’t mind if you accidentally saw a little more than the occasional shirtless attire he might wear around the tent.
But in the pod, the only part of him that had caught your curiosity was his stump, and you’d known Ezra intensely enough over the past couple of weeks where you knew he wouldn’t take offense. Especially if you asked him the right way.
“Will you tell me a story, Ezra?”
“I feel that it is my duty to do so whether you ask me to or not. Shall I choose, or is there something in particular you would like to hear?”
He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, propped up against his cot, going through his kit, cleaning his gear. You waited until he noticed your lack of answer and looked up to meet your eyes. When he saw that you had put your manual down and were focusing all your quiet attention on him, he stopped his busy work.
When Ezra gives you his attention, it is absolute. When he knows you seriously need something from him, that becomes his immediate main priority and all else can wait. It’s only gotten more intense since that day, but there is a trust that resides between you when you look into his eyes, gathering your words as he waits patiently every time to hear whatever you’re going to request of him. There’s always hope there in his big browns, always something specific he’s waiting for you to ask, and every day you get a little bit closer to understanding what it might be. But until then, any question is a welcome one, any query is met with his wish to provide.
“Will you tell me how you lost your arm?”
At first you thought you may have gone too far, that maybe you insulted him, as his eyebrows peaked together and he looked down at his hand. But then, “That is a tale that may cause you some consternation, trinket. The Green is dangerous and unforgiving, and there were times I may not have been a man worthy of fair opinion.”
“My father was a prospector, you know. I’ve heard stories. Have you ever killed anyone?”
He clicked his tongue and screwed up an eye, causing the thin white scar on his cheek to twist. Then he sighed and returned to your locked gaze. “To be honest, I have. Though I have never done so with pleasure, I have killed in defense and out of desperation, and it was out of dispatching a man in this way that I came to lose the second favorite of all my appendages.”
“Second favorite?”
“Well, it depends what you classify as a limb.” He huffed a small laugh, a spark in his eye, trying to diffuse the harsh subject in his own way.
His leaning into baseness never bothered you. There was something earthy about it, gritty and rough, but never lewd. You rewarded his crassness with a smile. “Do you plan on killing me out in the Green?”
“I would hope my murdering days are behind me, and if they are not, you would see me aim a thrower at everyone but you in the course of my spree. You are under my tutelage, and for that, I owe you a duty of care. That is my word by Kevva.”
“Then tell me the story. I like your stories. I promise not to judge now-Ezra by then-Ezra.”
A dimple formed on his cheek, a punctuation mark framing the approaching anecdote on his lips. “Then I will declare myself absolved of any sin heretofore and regale you with a clean and grateful heart.”
________________
You can see the tent through the trees and you realize with some horror that it’s just you and Ezra for the next few nights. If he’s angry with you, and this is how he is when he’s upset, the silence will be unbearable.
Even that little girl he helped out here years ago was probably more capable than you. You feel so lost in this moment, and it’s only made worse by his silence. You fumble with your communicator and hit the mute just in time to choke on a sob.
This isn’t like you. You’re not one to cry when things get rough. You hardly shed a tear when your father died. But the thought of that just brings another sob and as acting as your own psychologist you realize that you are experiencing some displaced sorrow, the odd need to please the leading male in your life, the one that’s walking ahead of you, away from you. If he’d just turn around and throw you his worn weary smile, if he’d just start up a conversation you’d know that there was hope for you, you’d know you didn’t give up everything to be here in a job you couldn’t hack.
You gotta stop this. Or it’s going to be an uncomfortable night.
Shake it off.
Once you enter the tent, the usual dance happens. Ezra reaches up to turn on the air scrubber and you unhook his filter tube from his helmet. When he turns to you, you pull open the zipper cover on his suit and start his zip for him before lifting his helmet up and off. He can pull the zip the rest of the way, but you generally pull the left collar down for him so he can get his arm out. He’s on his own from there as you turn to fuss with your own gear.
________________
You remember it starting easily enough. He was telling you a story about the breeding habits of the Tokovian Musk Owl and you could see he was having trouble with his suit zipper, yanking at it and trying to look down at it even though it was under his chin and his helmet. Without another hand to keep the fabric taut, the zip didn’t want to release, so you simply batted his hand away and started it for him. He didn’t even stop his yammering, just threw in a “thank you” somewhere in between “could hear them screeching” and “for a fuck.” He’d right out asked you the day before if you wouldn’t mind disengaging the filter tube just because it was delicate and he didn’t want to mangle the expensive part trying to pop it out one-handed day after day. And while he could manage the helmet fine enough, his prominent nose thanked you for a smoother removal for sure.
It wasn’t the only routine dance you’d concocted.
There was the harness dance.
While dig days were excruciating, you always looked forward to helping him attach the harness for his prosthesis--a kind of rigid pole attached to a shovel so you didn’t have to do all the hard digging alone. There were a couple of straps that came around his torso with multiple latches and you’d come to really enjoy wrapping your arms around him to fit the straps on. Sure, you could do the job just as easily from behind, but if you embraced him at the front, he’d usually raise his arm and let it come to rest around your shoulders while you worked. If you let yourself dream, it would be easy to imagine that he might be pressing you into him just a little bit.
And there was the harvesting dance.
On a dig, you were the one to mix the fazer and Ezra did the pour. He fished the sack, you cut the cord. You sliced the outer casing and held it open while he did the extraction. And with the flesh-covered stone, he told you every time to “hold it like you love it” so he could cut away the slippery blister before cleaning the gemstone.
It was a beautiful harmony. And the only way it worked. Because once on every dig he urged you to do a solo extraction, and on every dig, you pierced the blister and lost that stone. And on every dig, he squeezed your shoulder and told you it was a wondrous try, that he was proud of you, and there would always be another turn. There was no sarcasm, no pity, just a warm smile and ceaseless optimism even though you just lost both of you thousands in pay.
These were the first touches, these shoulder squeezes that ran down your arm on the let-go. Sometimes he would just reach out and grab onto you like a pole to help himself up, or he might stumble off balance on uneven ground and without the counterweight of his right arm he’d throw his hand out onto you to steady himself. He wasn’t beyond lightly touching the small of your back to encourage you down a path or to take your next try at a gem pull.
This was all part of something you’ve secretly named the left-handed-lover’s dance. Basically, that you keep on his left whenever you can in case he needs your help or has the inclination to reach for you. It started out as just trying to be a good partner. Then it became a passing hope that it was more than just a friendly bond. But you were both here to do a job. He was here to teach you to be an independent prospector and you were here to assist and learn. That was evident at the end of the day; once you were both in the tent and out of the suits he never touched you, never so much as bumped into you or grazed your hand in passing an item or clapped you on the arm after a good joke.
But out in the field all zipped in and helmets on, there was nothing more natural than his gentle hand guiding you or reaching for your assistance, including the day you realized you loved him.
________________
Before you can turn away to strip off your own coverings, Ezra catches your arm, spinning your face into the light. You try to shake him off, not wanting him to catch your eyes puffy from crying and your cheeks still streaked with tears, but his grip is not so gentle now and he yanks you back around to his stormy glare, chin up, brows low. His intensity paralyzes you, rendering you unable to continue your struggle when he catches your eyes with his.
When Ezra gives you his attention, it is absolute.
His gaze travels back and forth between your eyes, waiting for an explanation, a minute so stringent it breaks you down, dissolves you into the tears you’d tried so hard to hide.
“I’m sorry, Ezra. I really am trying... I don’t know why I’m such a scuffer at this and I know it would only be right to release you from the contract and tell you to send me back but I don’t want you to, I really wanna stay, I really wanna learn and I’m so, so sorry.”
Your words have an immediate effect, softening him, pulling his glare into concern and wonder, his lips parting just the tiniest bit in surprise.
“This is the reason for your heavy mood? You think I am provoked by your proficiency in the field?”
“I crusted up good today and it seems like you’re not happy about it. Just...know that it means so much to me that...I don’t wanna let you down.”
“Oh, trinket, no.” An incredulous huff jumps out of him and his grip on your arm loosens, becomes a splayed warm support behind your shoulder, moving in soothing patterns and you’re instantly relieved that your assumptions were wrong. “You have done no harm in my book. It is not an easy thing to deliver a gem of this ilk into the world unscathed. Your opportunities have been few and scattered and it takes many sticks before a lover becomes a lothario.” He knows the crass humor will make you laugh, knows what to say to lighten your heart, to get you to soften, and bring you into his intimate, conspiratorial mood. “To be perfectly honest, I am selfish to an unrighteous degree, for every gem you burn keeps me in value to you. A worthy sacrifice to guarantee you mightn’t be so quick in your need to fly away from me until your training’s complete.”
This causes a hitch in your breath as you see the welcome turn the conversation he’s taking and you follow the path he’s making for you. “I don’t want to leave you, Ez.”
A smile creeps up one side of his mouth. “Well then I am a happy man. A bargain is struck! Partners it is.”
“Partners it is.”
A moment hangs between you as he rubs his thumb in slow circles on your shoulder. There’s that look in his eye again, the one where he’s waiting for you to ask the question he wants to hear from you. So close now.
Still, you’re unsure. “I guess I’m lucky I found the one person who wants an incompetent partner.”
“No, I do not, nor is it what I have and I must express my objection to your self-debasement. This work is not for the shiny, and you have not once complained about taking on the meat of the digging or the crawl of my schedule.” His hand comes to your helmet shield and he rakes his thumb across it as if he ached to wipe away one of your staleing tears. “Those bright eyes of yours got a penchant for spotting deposits more skillfully than I could ever manage and that’s not something that can be taught; that’s talent, girl. The blistering?” He shrugs. “Even I can’t manage that without the steady help of your fine hands. You may think that your blunders in education are causing us some financial ruin, but our fortunes are creamy. I assure you, we can afford it.”
That look is still there. He’s waiting. “There’s some ‘us’ and ‘we’ in there, Ez.” Your hands drift to his sides, taking fistfuls of his compression suit top, willing him closer.
The edges of his eyes take on the crinkle you’ve come to find so much comfort in. “So there is.”
You’re almost there. You know what he wants. “Why were you so quiet on the walk back?”
“Because for the next few days we are alone here and I have a mind full of questions I do not know how to ask you.”
“Then let me go first.” A yearning happiness settles in his brown eyes; finally. Finally you’ve found out what it is he needs you to request of him. “If I take this helmet off, are you going to kiss me, Ez?”
His eyes close in contentment and he nods, “Yes. Yes, little jewel. Yes I am, that and more. I hope I have inferred correctly that it is your wish that I do so, because I am in free fall. I feel my orbit ending and my pull to you is complete.”
_______________
“A moon is an orbiting admirer, and what is an orbit but a long fall to oblivion?”
Speculating days were some of your favorite times, just wading through the brush and looking for the telltale signs and shoots of an underlying deposit. Sometimes you came upon nests of strange groundling insects or flowers that only grew in secret. There were treasures underfoot on this poisonous moon, but if you remembered to look up as well, you might find some dangerous beauties there too.
On that day--the one where you finally understood your heart--you’d looked up to find that you were on a cliffside overlooking a valley, the canopy a million different hues of green, the gas giant looming over half the sky in a big pink and orange semi-circle. There was a fallen log that served as a perfect seat for the perfect view and you knew Ezra wouldn’t mind if you stole a few moments to sit and to take it in. It’s just the kind of thing he’d appreciate. And you were proven right when he came up behind you, putting a hand on your shoulder to steady himself as he swung one leg then the other over the log, finding a perch next to you, spouting pretty words through the channel link--soft and low--about moons and orbits and obilvions.
“That glowing beauty is Bakhroma. She is quiet and fierce, made up of the unfathomable and the unknowable, always within sight, but out of reach and untouchable unless one would trade the honor with great sacrifice. She reflects the light that is given to her with a patience that is heretofore untold. And the Green Moon upon which we ride follows where she goes like a lovesick fool, spinning around her in a heady kind of adoration, full of secret treasures buried deep down that will ultimately one day belong to her, falling incrementally over eons until he finally loses himself in her, all his glories gladly forfeit to her welcome and inevitable embrace. Alone but together, seemingly eternal, pulled as one by the laws of a mysterious universe.”
The void that came after those words was filled with the beating of your heart, and you were sure he could hear it through the channel.
When he’d landed there beside you, you’d registered how his hand slid off your shoulder, diagonally down across your back, coming to rest at your waist, his arm draped lightly around you. Natural. Easy. Everything was warm--the colors of the sky, the care with which he kept you close as if to better hear the honey sweetness in his prose, the fire burning in your lungs and neck.
Ezra probably didn’t know that you spoke a little Vayok.
Bakh being the Vayok word for adornment. Ornament, Gem. Roma was a modifier, a diminutive. Small. Dear.
Bakhroma. Sentimental bauble. A little jewel.
In other words, a trinket.
All you wanted to do was sit down to take in the view of an entire world for a few moments, but by the time Ezra took your hand and helped you to your feet, all you saw was him.
________________
The helmet is barely off before his lips are sealed to yours in a press of greed. Even if he can’t form words when he kisses you, he can’t help but express his deep relief in a heartbreaking moan. It’s a fight to release yourself from the suit when he keeps pulling you against him and every time you try to get some space between you to work the zipper, he chuckles into your mouth, enjoying the tease and the struggle. It’s simultaneously frustrating and thrilling and you give in for a few moments just to give him what he seems to want so desperately right now.
Ezra kisses like a man starved for air, long, hard, and full of need, peeling his lips away only to come back for another breath of you until his initial want is slaked and he slows, allows for more time between his taking, his mouth starting to mumble against yours, praising you with pet names, telling you how perfect you are to him, how long he’s “fought against my more dubious natures to respect your womanly virtues and take them only when you could see in me a man worth bestowing them on.”
You’re able to use his weakness for monologuing to turn around in his vice-like embrace, finally freeing yourself of the suit and he takes the opportunity to drawl more pretty words in your ear, warning you that “I’m afraid I have been enamored of you overly long and may be extra eager in my attentions. So you just say the word if you need a slow down, gentle one, and I will do my best to comply. Although I will admit it will be a difficult endeavor indeed as I feel I am entering your atmosphere and nothing might quell this burn but finding some drowning place to land.”
Your first impression of him was of a man whose age and temperament and body would not be able to overpower you.
Your first impression was wrong.
Of course, it helps that you are willing.
It doesn’t take long for him to strip you down, and then himself. To kiss you down onto the floor. To find exactly where you like to be touched most and how long it takes for you to break from it. He has so many words for you, so many praises to sing about every part of you that is round or soft or wet, comparing you to things that are sweet and plush or celestial and holy. And when you take his favorite limb in hand--as wondrous as the rest of his body--and guide it to its fit, he plunders and harvests all you have to give him, filing you with himself, for as long as you call for it, as long as you let him. He loves you like he speaks to you: rough and drawn out, full of beautiful tangents and meandering plotlines, but in the end it is beautiful and fulfilling; you may be just a little bit confused how you got to the ending, but you’re completely in awe.
When you lay breathing heavy, staring but not seeing the ceiling of the tent, your consciousness seemingly lifted to see through it to the stars, to the glowing face of Bakhroma, you run hands through rough-chopped hair on a head laying on your chest. He’s listening to your heartbeat, waiting for it to slow down so he can start again. The air is thick--even the air scrubber can’t keep up with all your humidity--and there’s a halo around each bulb of the string lights just barely illuminating the darkness.
“How long, Ez?”
“Hm?”
“How long have you been waiting for that.”
“Most likely since the day you walked into my interview. I am a man of simple wants and you had all the right parts for my preferences.”
“For real, Ez.”
He tipped his head up to find you. “What you ask has many true answers, and I stand by the first. I have no qualms telling you of my weakness for a pretty succulence and a kind smile the likes of which you possess. But if you are asking when I knew I would have it, well, that may have been the first day you danced. Or when you asked me to read you to sleep. Or when I understood I wouldn’t let those bastard raiders get near enough to take their turn at your qualities when I had not had them myself. Or when you finally saw me as a viable person to drape your affections on; maybe it was that day too.”
“When I finally saw you as....”
“I have read many tomes and verses but none so full of beautiful passages as your face that day on the cliff. There is a difference of knowing and being. I knew the feel of your pull that day, but found I’d been in orbit all along.”
How he can live this way, twist everything into a tossed away poem...it should be exhausting. Yet you feed off it. You breathe it like air.
After another long cycle of frenzied entanglement and violent euphoria, you ask Ezra if he’d like to move to a cot, maybe get some sleep. “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to walk to the dig tomorrow morning,” you confess.
“No need to worry about tomorrow,” he says, wapping his arm around you and dragging you back to him, grumbling into your ear. “We are the only prospectors in this sector and the aurelac will wait. Until our new compatriots arrive, we are officially on hiatus. Recreational mining only. Restricted to the confines of this tent. By order of your supervisor. In the interest of more precious treasures. And I intend to strike it rich.”
“Well. I’m here to assist. And learn.”
“When it comes to this dig, trinket, you are more than competent. I am no longer your trainer. Partners it is.”
“Partners it is.”
The new contract is struck, signed and sealed in kissing and in touch and a long, slow fall into inevitable oblivion.
#ezra x reader#ezra/reader#ezra prospect#prospect fanfic#prospect fanfiction#pedro pascal#soft#soft ezra
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title: Convergence Theory pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader summary: You are a lesser family member of the Gojo clan, so far removed you don't even carry the name, but you carry the Limitless ability and thus the potential to be a bride to the future head of the clan— a fact you patently reject at fifteen. Twelve years later you are a second grade sorcerer struggling to obtain first grade status when the object of your deepest objections offers you a deal. rating: Mature for now, explicit later most likely because WHY NOT tropes: fake dating/engagement, rivals to lovers, slow romance Link: Archive of Our Own
August, 2005.
That summer had been oppressively warm, a layer of heat trapped beneath a layer of moisture that made even the light fabric of your yukata stick to your sides. It was the kind of weather that made your body beg for relief, to lay shivering and sweltering under the barest breath of cool air.
Your mother had opened the outside screens in the room, letting you sit on the porch overlooking the small garden at the center of the expansive, traditional home. The view was lovely, overlooking a manicured garden, a small koi pond bubbling pleasantly even as the night air chirped with the sounds of insects.
The main house was equipped with air conditioners in some of the rooms— just like your parent’s own home, only a short distance away, but somehow so far removed from the atmosphere of this place it felt miles away. Centuries. The clock on the wall seemed suspended in time, halted too by the weight that fell over this place.
There was nothing to be done. When the head of the Gojo family called, even the smallest vine, hanging from the tiniest branch, curled in. Your great grandmother had bore the Gojo name before she married, a detail of minor significance that had not effected your own family until your birth. You had often heard your parents discussing the main family in hushed voices when they thought you were not listening. First with excitement and eagerness and then with worry.
There had been a phone call, an order disguised as invitation.
Gojo Satoru, heir to the name, barer of the Six Eyes, was turning sixteen in December, a scant four months away.
Six Eyes. Two words that managed to leave the bitterest taste of bile in your throat.
It had been thought the next Six Eyes would be born in your generation, your parents hopeful at one point that you were the one so blessed. A hundred years of waiting ended by the birth of another child, honored above all other sorcerers. Your had been born with the Limitless, that much was certain and an extra unnaturally keen ability of foresight… the signs were there. The possibility that the the massive potential of the Limitless was within your grasp if you could only prove to possess the fabled Six Eyes…
You were hailed for a short time as possibly a true child of the Gojo blood, a blessing. A boon. And then not even a short year later that boy was tested. No two Six Eyes could exist and it was him, not you, who was truly blessed.
You ran your hands up the back of your neck, dislodging the hair stuck your heated skin.
And worse yet, now you would suffer the indignity of being paraded around with every other eligible girl with a single drop of Gojo blood diluted enough to be proper for marriage.
Gojo Satoru needed a betrothed and only the best would do, naturally.
You were to be polite, courteous and docile. Laugh at his jokes, bat your eyes. Play the role of the pursued for the pursuer.
Did you even want to be selected? Once hailed as the promised child, now degraded to probable broodmare ?
You sucked your teeth, holding back a feral shriek somewhere deep in your throat. There was a knock on the wooden frame of the room, lazy and slow. The door slid open before your mother could get you to return inside to the low tables and too hot tea laid out.
You were all but deaf to the sounds of stilted, forced polite conversation, but could not ignore the sudden presence of a young man who came to sit down hard at your side.
Gojo Satoru was not an unattractive young man. He had the signature Gojo coloring, his eyelashes even as pale as driven snow. You yourself had even inherited two streaks of white in your hair, framed near your face and standing in contrast against the rest.
But that handsomeness was hard to enjoy when his expression was one of such utter indifference. He did not even bother to remove the dark glasses that shaded over his eyes, but you hardly were offended. It would have been all the worse to have to look at the very thing you coveted most in this world. Taunting you. Dismissing you.
How many girls had he been forced to sit with today? Judging by his bored expression, too many.
“This is the part where you tell me your name.” He said, voice amused, yet slightly condescending. Behind you both, his parents spoke with your own, but that too was part of the charade. All eyes were on you. All ears tuned to your words.
“You know my name.” You said with a thinly veiled sigh. His attention shifted just a fraction and you noticed with an indignant flush he was wearing his school uniform. Shirt untucked, jacket unbuttoned. You had been forced to spend hours getting ready for this meet-up.
He tilted down his glasses to give you a halfway appraising look and you turned away.
“Goin’ for the aloof angle then? Some other girls tried it too. As if you pretend hard enough that you aren’t interested somehow I will be.”
How fucking arrogant.
Your fists clenched in your lap.
“It won’t work.”
“I’m not working any ‘angle’.” You grumbled, “I was told to be here so I’m here. That’s all.”
“You expect me to believe that, huh?”
“I don’t care what you believe.” You spat back, turning to shoot him a piercing glare.
There was silence then, even the voices behind you seeming to falter and lower as if worried they were missing out on some secret hushed conversation.
“Ohhh, wait. I remember now! I do know your name.” Gojo continued, taking off his sunglasses and wiping off some smudge or dust from the lens, “Aren’t you that girl they thought was gonna have the Six Eyes in her?”
Your fist clenched tighter.
“I get it now. Sour grapes and all. Tell ya what…” he spoke softer and leaned in until you felt his breath against your ear, “If you ask me really nicely, for one night, you still could."
The only sound that came after that was the harsh strike of skin against skin. The contact of your palm connecting to his cheek stunned not just the adults inside, but you.
No self respecting sorcerer with the Limitless ability would have been taken by surprise and yet here you sat, having successfully struck the heir to the Gojo name right across his smug face.
You drew your hand back. His pale cheek had turned a throbbing red so quickly, his smirk raised as his glasses slid down the bridge of his nose and revealed how his blue eyes danced with open amusement.
***
September, 2017.
The uproar that followed that moment twelve years ago had been profound. Your parents had spent the remainder of the visit profusely apologizing and demanding explanations… and the entire time Gojo had stared only at you. Blue eyes wide and engulfing, a smirk etched in the corner of his mouth even as he got up and strode out without another word.
You remembered he had whistled as he went. As if it were all according to plan.
No betrothal was agreed to that night nor any night since. You were never summoned to the main house again.
It had been the most freeing moment of your young life, opening the world from the one pinpointed hope you’d be born with the Six Eyes or wed to the one who had it into a kaleidoscope of possibility.
You attended Jujutsu Tech’s Kyoto branch, keeping far out of the way of the rising star of the Gojo clan.
Well.
Sorta.
So the problem with having an inherited technique that allowed you to “see” curses and cursed energy users from great distances? Gojo Satoru. The man was such an expansive supernova of energy that when you opened your mind and utilized your gift of telemetry to try and pinpoint targets you had to navigate around his massive, dominating aura.
It was like counting stars against a sunlit sky. The ability, that should have been astronomically useful, rendered inert if Gojo Satoru was on the field.
You tried not to have your own missions line up with his. Which meant keeping tabs on him. Which meant having to live with this gnat, this buzzing fly of cursed bullshit constantly humming in the background when you used your gifts.
You wished everyday you had swatted him harder.
Missions in Tokyo were the worst, but you accepted them without complaint. The fact you’d even managed to rise to second grade despite your public humiliation of the main family’s golden child was a miracle in itself and not one you would squander.
The task was simply. There was a cursed entity that was utilizing the signal within electric devices of all things to move from device to device, rapid as an electrical pulse. It had already killed five non-sorcerers in surge related house-fires in two days. The risk of it causing a massive firestorm in any district rising.
The air had begun to cool in Tokyo, the heat of the summer giving way to fall. You sat on a bench, wireless com already clipped to your ear, the only sound so far the faint static of the open radio and the sound of your breath. The air had that crispness already, the bare cusp of autumn. You steadied your thoughts and began to shut down your senses.
The cursed energy of the young sorcerer students around you began to glow in your mind’s eye, the rest of the world fading into shades of imperceptible grey. Blurring. Distorting.
If you had the Six Eyes, you would be able to see it all. But instead, you blinded yourself to everything but the cursed when you utilized your skill.
You shut your eyes and with a soft breath you whispered, “Cursed technique— Limitless Telemetry: Grey.”
The city revealed itself to your five senses like a massive overflowing of information. Had you not taken the time to adjust, quickly shutting down your hearing, sight, taste, smell and touch in order to compensate, the mental load would have stunned you into a comatose state for several hours. Another thing a Six Eyes user would never need to do. You mentally chastised yourself for allowing the distraction of a deprecating thought, and focused instead upon your sixth sense. The one that tracked beyond the physical.
You were effectively helpless in this state, but within your mind you breezed through the city like a thumb pressed over the pages of a book. Flipping at your leisure as you focused in upon the fastest moving pulse of cursed energy.
In your “peripheral vision” or what acted like a sort of peripheral vision, you could sense the constant presence of Gojo. It was far away, diluted. You wondered if perhaps he was overseas for the barest moment until your senses snapped together and fell upon your target.
You spoke. Your words falling on your own deaf ears as you gave the location into the com. You perceived the movement of the three students. Good kids, fast learners. One boy was even a scion of another great house and the one girl among them possessed a cursed technique of extreme value. The other boy, the pink haired one, you had yet to understand, but his cursed energy output was impressive.
The entity moved. You adjusted, giving new instructions. The curse had not yet caught on to the fact it was being tracked, a fact you would use to your advantage as long as possible. If the curse sensed you, it could easily close the distance and attempt to seek you out… which was why sitting in a park, far from any electrical devices other than your battery powered radio was the safest place you could be.
And if worse came to worse, at least it would be drawn out in the open.
The entity jumped again, following the planned route the three had decided upon to box it further and further into a section of the city that they had already prepared to shut down. Without power, the curse would have to break free of its hiding place within the electric current.
How did a curse even get into the power grid? Too many lost football games on TV? You chuckled a bit to yourself without thinking, providing the newest coordinates as you watched, like an omnipresent spectator as the energies of the curse and the students moved.
This is why I score the highest at Pac-Man…
Everything was going according to plan. You had begun to even let your thoughts wonder, your focus softening just the barest fraction as the students rounded the final corner and blocked the curse into the chosen spot.
And now here comes the switch…
You braced for the surge of cursed energy you expected to feel from it’s ejection…but the power stayed on. You had to stifle the sensation of panic that sparked through your heart, your cursed energy rising a fraction.
And there it was. You felt the shift, the sudden adjusting of the entity. The students flared bright, attacking to try and ward off its escape, but without the power shut off they were waiting for, the curse easily vanished, pulsing through the city and heading now straight ahead… to you.
It’s fine. Fine. Nothing electric by me, so no fast travel.
It couldn’t pass through the coms. It would need to branch off into another grounded circuit and then physically come out to face you in the empty park.
You could hold unto the technique a little longer. Guide the students a little longer. You snapped information in quick short terms. Watching the cursed energy approach closer and closer until it reached the last building at the far end of the park.
And then, inexplicably, it jumped again.
The force in which you were propelled did not immediately register to your mind as your senses flickered and began to come back on line one by one.
The first was touch.
And thus pain.
Your muscles contracted, shot full with an electrical pulse. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been, the strike coming indirectly as if someone had forced the curse away. Something blinding and bright exploding over the far-reaching vision of your Limitless technique before your ability snapped off like a cut thread.
Your hearing came back first from sheer force of will. Sight returning in blurry, slowly filling shapes. You forced yourself up from the ground, feeling scrapes biting along your palms.
“You fucking dick.” You managed to hiss, your vision returning just in time to witness the exorcism of the curse by none other than Gojo Satoru.
***
“You used me as bait!”
Your voice reverberated off the hallway walls, your mild injuries tended to but your grievances still in desperate need of airing.
You were only comforted by the fact his students had not been involved in the deception, having also thought Gojo was away while they worked under her guidance in the meanwhile. You were no teacher, but you had taken enough students through missions to be adequate at “babysitting”.
Gojo grinned easily, eyes hidden behind his blind fold as he ran a hand up his neck, feigning a bashfulness you knew had not an ounce of genuineness to it.
The bastard had quietly set up a god damn daisy chain of extension cables into the park, ending plugged into a cheap TV set… right next to you. And he’d done it only after you’d entered your Limitless, taking advantage of your lack of senses to literally bait you like a god damn fish hook and then swoop in to destroy the curse.
His students had been a distraction. A means to force the curse into seeking you out and getting into the open where it could not easily run again. It was the most convoluted, infuriatingly, ridiculous brilliant bullshit you had heard in a long while.
“Pretty clever, yeah? I’ve been practicing my multi-layer tactics.”
“That wasn’t a tactic, it was a gamble and a shitty one at that!”
“Yeah, yeah, but did you die?” Gojo asked, tilting his head to the side. His voice was tinged with amusement and you wondered for a moment if he even remembered you and this was some elaborate “gotcha” twelve years in the making… or if this kind of backhanded backstabbing was common place for him.
“It was interesting to see your technique in action. I could probably give you some tips on how to make it more effective, but they’d be pretty useless to— well. You. So I figure I’ll just make the tweaks and practice it myself!”
You stayed silent.
“What did ya call it? Limitless Telemetry?”
You turned and walked in the opposite direction.
“Whoa— hold on.”
Your exit was cut off, the grinning face you wanted nothing more than to connect your fist into coming back into view.
“I’m kidding. Don’t run off and cry now, we got some other business I wanna discuss.”
“If you’re planning on pitching another mission to me, I pass.”
“Nope. Well— yes. But not like this one.”
You sighed, side stepped, and continued around him again.
“I’ll buy you lunch!”
You stopped.
“And maybe even some kakigōriiiiiiii—“ he continued, his voice lifting to a sing-song tone as he stretched out the word. Your stomach twisted and grumbled in response. Using your Limitless always took so much out of you… a side effect you wondered if he experienced to.
You turned to look back at the man who hadn’t so much as glanced your way in years and wondered again if he was so stupid he didn’t remember who you were or if he was hatching some new plot.
He smiled in what you assumed he thought was a disarming and charming way.
“Fine.”
***
You had settled for a sweet plum flavor, dipping your small wooden spoon into the shaved ice and enjoying the way it melted across your tongue. Flavors always felt more pronounced after you used your Limitless, smells more intense. The sights sharper. It was probably just a placebo effect from being without them, even for a short amount of time, but regardless you enjoyed the sweet flavor and the fruity smell of the different syrups… most of which were coming from Gojo’s own cup.
He had gotten every flavor. The shaved ice in his cup a rainbow of color and tastes as he scooped several together at a time.
The lunch he promised had yet to come, but the treat was enough for now as the sugar helped give a little more pep to your body and your mood. The amount of calories you expended using your gifts was another thing entirely.
The two of you walked a ways in silence, giving you time to observe him for the first time in over a decade.
He had changed, that much you could tell. There was something less harsh in his general demeanor and he had grown considerably since he was fifteen. The boyishness of his face had sharpened, the man overtaking his features. He was broader, less lanky than his teenage self and while his easygoing and devil-may-care attitude was still present, there was something less— edged about it. Less angry.
“Your hair is shorter now,” Gojo said suddenly, “And your chest is bigger.”
You immediately frowned. A look of open disgust flashing over your face. Gojo laughed.
“Thought I forgot about ya, didn’t you?” He slid a thumb over his cheek, the gesture making you flush at the memory of what it felt like to slap the smirk off his face.
“Honestly? Yes.” you answered shortly, taking another bite of your ice.
“Nah. I remember, just figured there was no point in makin’ nice. You seem to be doing fine on your own these days. Second grade, yeah?”
“Yes.”
“As short worded as ever.”
He strode off, forcing you to match his pace. He found a park bench and sat down, sprawling out lazily. You sat next to him at his insistence, knocking your knee into his own until he closed his thighs a bit more with a chuckle.
“Thought you’d be a first grade by now.”
“I have not been recommended.”
He snorted, “Bet you know why.”
You clenched your teeth, holding back a sharp word and an even sharper desire to toss your kakigōri right in his face. Arrogant as ever. Some things, you guessed, did not get better with age.
“The great and fabled Six Eyes holding a grudge over a love tap? How trite.” you said, trying to keep your words indifferent.
“Is that what it was? I had a bruise ya know.”
“You could have stopped my hand before it ever even touched you. You wanted me to slap you so you could get out of having to do anymore meetings.”
His laugh was all the confirmation you needed.
“Is that what you’ve thought all this time?”
“It’s what I know.”
Gojo turned his attention back to his shaved ice, the two of you sitting in silence long enough for the weight of it to become uncomfortable for you. Finally you shifted and scrapped your spoon down the ice, leaving trails of melting syrup.
“What is it that you want?” Because that was what this was about wasn’t it? He wanted something. The main family never disdained to speak to the lower members without a need and Gojo Satoru was not about to be the exception.
“I’m going to recommend you for first-grade sorcerer status.”
You scrapped your spoon through so harshly a chunk of colored ice fumbled down the side of the paper cup and down your hand. You dodged just in time to avoid it landing with a wet smack on your pants.
You gaped openly at him, but Gojo kept his attention fixed on his ice, happily stirring it up into a soupy, syrupy mess.
“… and yet again I ask, what is that you want?”
Gojo leaned back, tilting his face towards you with an easy grin. You wondered if he saw the world the way you did with your Limitless with his eyes shaded. Seeing only the impressions of energy and sensation. Could he see your expression? The confusion in the downturn of your mouth or the suspicion in the narrowness of your eyes?
“Nothing too crazy! Just need a fiancée.”
The breath punched out of your lungs.
***
You waited outside the small convenience store across the street, feeling your cheeks beginning to lessen in redness from both anger and embarrassment at your sudden outburst.
When Gojo returned from inside, his hair was still wet… and there was still some redness from the syrup stuck to the strands. You hadn’t been able to control the impulse to throw your kakigōri at him, the breaking of your composure having flowed directly down your arm. It could have been worse, you supposed. You could have punched him.
He had needed to rinse off his blindfold, the fabric now folded and tucked into his back pocket. He had replaced it with the dark glasses you recognized from his youth, giving you a glimpse of the bright blueness of his eyes every once and awhile.
Gojo sighed and tossed a damp paper towel into a bin and turned to you expectantly. You gingerly handed him back his own dessert, having minded it for him while he went into the men’s room to clean up. It was practically soup now and you winced when he lifted it to his lips and drank it.
“As I was saying—“ he began with a smack of his lips.
“No—”
“—it’s a pretend engagement.”
Your mouth hung open, half ready to utter another refusal, which you swallowed back in as he waited expectantly for you to cease interrupting him.
“You let me take you on a few dates, we put on a show of my courting a potential betrothed and in exchange I green light your promotion.”
You narrowed your eyes, biting the corner of your lip into your mouth in obvious consideration.
“For how long?”
Your directness didn’t seem to offend him. Quite the opposite actually. Every time you curtly dropped a single or few word sentence he seemed to only smile brighter.
Gojo shrugged, “A few months. Maybe more. Until I figure out a permanent solution.”
“Your parents want you to get married?”
“The whole clan wants me to get married, sweetheart. I am the strongest.”
And now came the obvious question.
“Why me?”
Gojo shrugged, “You were one of their first picks to start with, so they’ll approve. And there isn’t a risk of you falling for me…”
His lips upturned into a sly grin, “… too quickly.”
You scoffed.
“Family will back off. I get a bit of peace until I have to kick you to the curb, and you get to be a first-class sorcerer. Everyone wins.”
“I’m not going to fall for you.”
Gojo gave a sad little nod, like he was agreeing with a deluded person in order to keep them calm and reasonable.
Granted, you did just effectively hurl a slushy at him a few minutes prior.
“This seems a bit extreme, even for you. Why do you think I’d even say yes? You know exactly why you got slapped. Can I expect that same level of charm from our future ‘dates’?” you asked, kicking yourself for having implied in your words you knew him well enough to even know what was extreme for him. The comment did not go unnoticed, even with his half expression hidden you could tell his interest was piqued. The last thing you wanted to do was to explain to this insufferable man how his very presence was as constant as the sun. Always nagging in the back of your mind and in your abilities.
You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.
“That was awhile ago. Most girls find me pretty charming these days. As to why you’d say yes— given it is probably your best chance at getting to first grade sorcerer status, I can’t think of a reason you wouldn’t.”
You bit the inside of your cheek. Fifteen year old you would be outraged, furious. She would not have considered this offer for a second. She would have stamped her foot and told him exactly where he could stick his offer.
But twenty-eight year old you had learned that very often principles were made to be damned.
“And the fact I can tell you are just dying to say yes.”
There was that arrogance again.
“You still buying me lunch?” you countered and the smile he gave you was a bit different than the ones before.
“Wow. No one will even question how I could have been charmed by such a talented freeloader.”
“I am exceedingly charming.”
“And what an arm. You play softball or you just start a lot of food fights as a kid?”
“I want sushi.” You said, the finality of your voice inarguable. You thought he might have rolled his eyes, but nevertheless you got your lunch and even managed to bargain a single day to think about the offer.
#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x oc#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujustu kaisen fanfiction#gojo satoru fanfic#gojo satoru x you#IDK WHAT I AM DOING LOL#YOLO
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IN YOUR MEMORIES
a/n: alright so this was inspired by an amazing fic called Graveyard by @wkemeup if you haven’t read it... WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR??? honestly, i was amazed by the whole idea of having to “pay a price” for a super power and i’ve been really itching to try myself out in this concept, so that’s what this story is. im really excited to share this with you guys so i hope you’ll like it!
pairing: Bucky X Reader
warnings: a hell lot of Bucky’s past pain, a little bit of angst aaand idk im really bad with these warnings
word count: 7.6k
masterlist

“I’ve been trying to figure out an effective way to help him, but it’s been more complicated than I expected. None of my ideas were good enough to even attempt them.” Shuri lets out a frustrated sigh as you stare at the peaceful face of the sleeping man in front of you in the cryo pod. The glass in front of his face is frosty, but you can still make his sharp features out, his chiseled jawline under the stubble, the elegant line of his nose and the thick lashes fanning over his cheeks as his eyes are shut closed.
“His whole mind needs to be rewired, his corrupted memories should be replaced or wiped out so the trigger words wouldn’t work any longer, but I can’t do that on my own.”
Tearing your gaze away from the man you look at her, an apologetic expression adorning her features, because she swore you’d find shelter in Wakanda, a place where you can be just like anyone else and yet, she is now asking you to use your power.
“Do you think he would let me help him?” you ask, glancing back at the man. Bucky, as Shuri called him, doesn’t look as old as he was said to be. A hundred and six years is a lot for a human like him, though he is not as mortal as others on the planet. Shuri told you about the experiments he had to endure through his life and even though you haven’t even touched his mind, you could feel the pain inside you.
“He is desperate to get rid of his dark side, I think he would do anything.”
Reaching up your fingers graze the glass over his face before you plant your whole palm onto it, trying to feel him even under the surface and ice. Eyes shutting close, you take a deep breath as you let your senses open up and find your way to the man.
Because of the cryo pod, you don’t feel him the way you usually do. It’s like he is just an echo in a huge empty room, you can’t make out his whole mind, but he is there. And even with him sleeping under the ice, you still can feel the despair and pain he had to go through as an innocent man. You know he deserves to be saved, he deserves to be freed from his own past and you are his only chance as of right now.
“Wake him up,” you simply tell Shuri before turning around to go back to your room that was assigned to you upon your arrival in the palace.
Bucky doesn’t feel like he has been asleep under the ice for more than just a few hours. It felt like a nap, but in reality he woke up months after the day he closed his eyes.
Shuri welcomed him with the news that the cure has been found and it’s time for him to get rid of the Winter Soldier for once and for all. She didn’t say much about the method, just told him to get ready by the afternoon. He was never one to question the genius young girl so he just obeyed.
After a hot shower he shaved and took the time to get accustomed to the prototype of the vibranium arm Shuri left for him. It’s not the final version, a lot of details need work, but it’s good enough for his everyday life for a while.
The world hasn’t seemed to change since he last saw it. Wakanda is just as flourishing and vibrant as he remembered, a truly spectacular place in his opinion. He wonders how his friends have been, what Steve is doing, if Natasha is alright… Is Tony still fuming after their last encounter? He probably is.
When it’s time, he leaves his room and heads to Shuri’s lab for their meeting. The guards let him in with just a nod, like he is an old friend and he finds Shuri at her computer as always. The girl beams upon seeing him again, complimenting on his freshly shaved look.
“So what did you invent for me, smartpants?” he smiles at her gently. Bucky owes a lot to Shuri and her brother, they took him in when he wasn’t welcomed anywhere else and now she is about to give him his life back. After this, he’ll forever owe her and her family.
“Well, it’s not my invention this time,” she chuckles shaking her head. Bucky is about to question her when the doors open again, both of them turning in the direction just to see you walk in. His eyebrows knit together at the sight of you, not entirely sure what it’s supposed to be. “Mr. Barnes, let me introduce you to Y/N. Y/N, this is Sergeant Barnes.”
You walk closer, Bucky’s icy blue eyes are glued to your form as you stop a few feet away from him, holding out a hand shyly.
“It’s nice to meet you, Sergeant James Barnes,” you smile softly as his flesh hand takes yours and shakes it gently.
Bucky is enamored with you instantly. He has never seen someone as delicate, soft and charming as you are, your whole aura just demands his attention and he wants to know everything about you. But he also notices that though you look a lot like any other human on the planet, he is convinced you are not from Earth.
What he doesn’t know is that the moment your hands touch, you can hear his thoughts and you can’t push down your smile at how well he is at inspecting his surroundings.
“Just call me Bucky, please,” he nods before your hands let go of each other and his thoughts quiet down again in your head.
“To answer your suspicion, I’m rorm a planet called Lortena. Life on my planet looks a lot like humans here on Earth, but our lifespan is a little longer and some of us have gifts, as my mother always liked to call them.”
“How did you—“ “How did I know what you thought?” you ask with a small smile, finishing his sentence as he nods in complete awe. “I’m what you might call… a mind reader. But my abilities go a little farther than just reading minds,” you admit and his lips part at the revelation.
Bucky glances over at Shuri, part of him thinking it’s some kind of joke or witchcraft, but the girl smiles back at him with an assuring nod.
“Why don’t we sit down and have a chat? I’m sure you have a lot of questions,” Shuri suggests patting Bucky’s shoulder before the three of you head into her conference room.
Though you’re not touching Bucky, you can sense his confusion and hunger to learn more about you. He is curious about what else you are capable of and though the news about your abilities are still quite odd to him, you can tell that he isn’t trying to shut you out entirely. He just has some reservations for now.
Bucky knows it’s rude to stare, but he can’t stop himself from inspecting you. Knowing that you are not from this planet is already enough for him to get his mind racing, especially because you look just like any other humans on Earth. But the little trick you did on him was enough of a convincing for him to believe that you are from somewhere else.
The three of you sit to the table and Shuri takes the lead to start the conversation.
“While you were asleep, Sergeant, life went on and we had a lot going on,” she smiles, her eyes falling on you. “Y/N is a refugee from her planet, Lortena. There’s a war going on there and she was sent away because she was a primary target. She wasn’t supposed to end up here, but there was a little mishap during her journey and landed in Wakanda.”
“Are you targeted because of your… powers?” Bucky asks, hoping he is not asking anything offensive.
“No,” you shake your head. “It’s because I’m the king’s daughter.”
“Oh!” he breathes out.
Great, so she is not only a breathtakingly beautiful creature with superpowers, but she is royal as well, he thinks to himself.
“And how… where do your… powers come from? Is that a usual thing on your planet?”
“Not quite,” you chuckle softly.
You give a glance at Shuri who nods and brings up a hologram of Loki’s scepter with the mind stone in it. Bucky is already familiar with them, but he is curiously listening to find out what it has to do with you.
“Long before the mind stone was trapped into the scepter, it was in our possession. We used it as out main power source, kept locked away from preying eyes and hands. We all knew it’s capable of more than what we use it for, but we didn’t want to risk it and use it for the wrong purposes.”
The hologram changes and now the mind stone is on display on its own.
“But not everyone agreed with that. A couple hundred years ago there was a war for the stone. Though our people sacrificed everything to protect it, they didn’t succeed entirely. Unfortunately, the attackers didn’t know how great the stone’s power is. In the midst of the chaos, there was an explosion caused by the stone. Almost everyone present was killed, only seven survived and they were blessed with different powers coming from the stone.”
Bucky’s lips part as his eyes flicker over to you from the stone in the middle of the table, while you are staring at the hologram remembering back the stories your parents told you growing up. He feels like he is being shared with an ancient legend, a piece of history that is a privilege to know.
“The powers they were gifted with were held at great heights after the war was over. And while some of them could pass it on to their children, some couldn’t. The seven became four, then just two and there was one left. My grandmother. When my father didn’t show any signs of the stone’s power it was believed the magic was gone forever, but then I was born and…”
“And you had the powers,” Bucky chimes in, completely in awe of your origin story. You nod with a shy smile as the hologram of the stone disappears in the middle of the table.
“Yes.”
“And why is there a war on your planet right now?”
“Because though it’s been a miracle that I inherited my grandmother’s powers, the people want to get the stone back and have more of its powers. Unfortunately, the stone was lost through the years and I was informed that Thanos got a hold of it some time ago,” you explain, turning to Shuri for assurance about the accuracy of your words and she nods. “Who then gave it to Loki and now it’s in the scepter. People were demanding my father to start a war for the stone to get it back to Lortena, but he refused to sacrifice his army to get the stone back from a titan.” Sighing you lean back in your seat as you think about your home, your family that was left behind when your father sent you away because he was afraid the rebels would use you to get to him.
“The stone is not at Thanos’ any longer,” Bucky speaks up and your eyes find him as you snap out of your thoughts.
“I was informed of that as well. It’s um… it’s Vision’s now, right?” They both nod. “Well, the rebels think it’s Thanos’ and you better hope it stays that way. Because if they figure out that the titan doesn’t have it any longer, they won’t hesitate to attack you for the stone.”
Bucky’s jaw clenches at the thought of another war to take part in, but also because you had to go through such terrible events because of other’s greediness.
“I’ve been trying to find a solution to help you since you’ve gone to sleep, but I wasn’t able to come up with any,” Shuri speaks up. “But then Y/N arrived and I think she could be the one to do the job.”
“You think you can do that?” Bucky asks, eyebrows pulled together. “What else can you do, other than reading minds?”
You feel hesitant revealing the depths you’re able to reach with your abilities and you’re afraid he would find it too invading after everything he has been through. You want to help him but he has to let you. Though you’re powerful, if someone resists your attempts, the outcome won’t be the same as if they cooperated.
“If you let me… I can change your memories. I can make them appear differently in your head so what they did to you won’t have an effect on you any longer.”
Bucky’s jaw twitches. He has no idea what he was expecting, but not this for sure. Letting another person get into his head, play with his mind like it’s just a toy, it’s something he vowed not to let anyone do it again. But as he stares back at you, he can tell the difference between you and the monsters who ruined his head before. He is at a safe place and everyone here wants what’s good for him.
“It only works if you let me do it,” you add and notice how he presses his lips together into a thin line.
“I would do anything to get rid of him. So… I’m in,” he nods at last and you let out a relieved sigh.
You’ve never tried to corrupt so much of someone’s memories before and you’re not sure how long it will take to complete the task so you requested to start the next day, giving you some time to get ready physically and mentally and of course, for Bucky to get himself ready for his mind to yet again get taken apart by someone else.
Not having much to really do since your arrival other than helping Shuri out occasionally at the lab or giving assistance for T’Challa around the palace, you’ve been able to explore your temporary home in the heart of Wakanda.
There is a hidden terrace near your room, one that’s not well-known even by the people living in the palace and you like the peace and calm whenever you are out there, surrounded by flowers and plants in hand-painted pots, some of them were made by yourself, watching over the breathtaking view of Wakanda in front of you, the sky turning from bright blue to shades of orange, pink, purple and eventually black as the Sun goes down behind the hills.
Tonight, this is where you are seeking peace again, sorting your thoughts out about what you’ll have to face tomorrow. Your power has a lot of benefits but it has its curses as well. You’ve only attempted to do something similar before and you had to learn the hard way what price you have to pay for having control over someone else’s mind, thoughts and memories.
Your brother was tragically killed in an uprising when he was only seventeen and you were ten. It was the result of a series of unfortunate event, he was at the wrong place at the wrong time, no one could help him. Your mother broke under the pain of losing her own child and you listened to her cries every and each night for months before you decided that you needed to help her. She didn’t want to let you even try, afraid it might take too much of you to help her, but you insisted and she eventually gave in. You altered her memories and feelings about your brother’s death, only left her with the ones that bring her joy and happiness, but your gesture demanded a price you weren’t ready to pay.
Upon your own grief for your brother, you had to bear your mother’s as well, the pain of two people clutching your heart and mind in return for your mother’s happiness. You never told her how you cried yourself to sleep every night for an entire year, how you could barely control your dark flashbacks and the constant darkness that was pulling you down. No one knew what you had to go through just to see your mother smile again and you made sure it stayed that way. However, you didn’t dare to do it again, not entirely sure if you could handle the pain one more time.
You surprised yourself when you offered your help to Bucky. You don’t even know him, yet you are willing to take his pain and make it yours just so he can live a somewhat normal life. Though his memories and nightmares won’t torture you as long as they would have did with him, you’ll still have to fight his demons and he won’t even know it. Then why are you doing this?
You have no answer to that. Seeing him for the first time you just had a feeling that you have to do it, that he is worthy of it all and that you want to be the person to free him.
The glass door opens behind you as you’re watching the Sun disappear on the horizon and you’re surprised to see Bucky walk out to the terrace, stopping in his tracks once he notices you sitting on one of the wooden chairs.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t think anyone would be here,” he mumbles, his gaze snapping down at the floor.
“That’s what I thought too,” you chuckle.
“I’ll leave you—“ he starts, ready to leave, but you stop him.
“You don’t have to. Feel free to join,” you tell him, gesturing towards the other chair. His hesitation is clear at first, but then he closes the door behind him and sits beside you.
Bucky watches the sunset in awe, but he can’t shake his curiosity towards you, having to control himself not to stare at you as he tries to figure you out. You’re not the only one who doesn’t understand why you’re doing this major gesture for him, he’s spent the afternoon trying to find any alternative motives that might explain your willingness to help him. He couldn’t find any and it left him with even more puzzles in his tortured head.
“What is it like on your planet?” he finds himself asking, breaking the long silence between the two of you.
“It’s not too different than here,” you admit truthfully. “Though our technology is a little more advanced,” you add with a soft chuckle. “In a way I’m happy I ended up here, because Wakanda reminds me of my home.”
“You miss it, don’t you? Your home?”
“Who doesn’t?” you ask with a soft smile and Bucky nods. He misses his home too, but in his case, it’s not a place but a time, decades ago, when he was his true self instead of the monster Hydra forced him to become.
“I’m sure it’ll be nice to return once the war is over,” he hums to himself and he expects a warm and positive reaction from you, however all he sees is pain and sadness in your eyes. “What is it?”
You hesitate to share it with him, staring back at him you think about keeping your thoughts to yourself, but how could you expect him to let you get into his head if you don’t share your thoughts with him willingly?
“Bucky, I don’t think I’ll ever return to my planet,” you breathe out as your gaze moves back to the scenery in front of you, the burning disk of the sun already hidden behind the hills.
“What do you mean?”
“The ship I came with can’t be fixed and they don’t know that I ended up here. It would take them too long to find me here and that’s if… If my family will be alive by then. I have no idea what’s happening there right now, if the rebels are winning or my father is able to keep things under control. I see very little likelihood of my return.”
Bucky’s heart aches for you, knowing well the pain you feel, he finds it ironic how the both of you are stuck so far away from your homes, seeking shelter at the same place at the same time.
He thinks it’s fate.
“What’s your favorite memory from your home?” he asks and you turn to him with soft and shining eyes. He is expecting you to tell him about it, but instead you decide to show it.
Grabbing his hand that’s closer to you, you bring it up to your face and make him cup the side of your head, his thumb brushing against your cheekbone as you close your eyes and recall the memory, planting into his head as well, taking him back, like the two of you could travel time and space just that easily.
Bucky can barely believe what he is experiencing but he finds himself inside your memory and it all seems so real, as if it was happening in the moment. He is standing in the middle of a meadow filled with luscious, green grass and some kind of flowers, whites and purples and yellows dancing in the soft breeze. At first he thinks he is alone, he doesn’t see you anywhere around him and then he spots a woman in a long, light pink dress, her hair waving behind her in the gentle summer breeze and then he spots a little girl running behind her.
Bucky walks closer to the woman, but she doesn’t acknowledge his presence, she doesn’t even look his way and when he reaches out to touch her arm, his hand goes right through her figure, as if she was just a ghost.
The little girl finally catches up with the woman, a handful of flowers in her hands and when looks up Bucky realizes that it’s you as a child. Your main features can still be found behind the round cheeks and pouty lips.
“Mom! I picked these for you!” your younger self beams, holding the little bouquet of flowers up to your mother, who takes it with a bright smile.
“So beautiful, my love!” she hums, sniffing the flowers as you giggle at her. “But why don’t we use them for something?”
“For what?” you ask with a curious look and Bucky can’t help the smile on his face. It’s such a pure and joyful memory, he almost wishes it was his.
Your mother sits down in the grass, her skirt fanning over her in a circle as she pulls you down to her lap with your back facing her before she combs her fingers gently through your hair and starts braiding it, sticking the little flowers into the braid as she moves down. You start singing some kind of song, one Bucky doesn’t know, and your mother smiles brightly at your chiming voice. She braids with so much care and precision, at the end it looks perfect and very much princess-like with the flowers littering around.
“There. Now you are a bouquet of flowers yourself, my love” she smiles at you, kissing your cheek before letting you out of her arms, watching you dance around in your dress, singing to yourself without a care in the world.
Bucky wants to stay there, more than anything and see more of your younger version and your mother, but he is abruptly pulled back into reality when you pull his hand back from your face and the connection stops. His eyes snap open and they find yours, so enamored and in awe of what he just experienced, he feels like he was let in on a secret no one else knows in the world.
“Wow. That was… amazing,” he breathes out as his hand drops back to his lap while you just smile back at him shyly. “Is that… Is that what it’s gonna be like when you…?”
“Not quite,” you shake your head. “You won’t feel anything, you’ll just have to think back to all the memories you want to be changed or wiped. I’ll be the one stuck in your memories like you were in mine. And from inside, I’ll be able to change them.”
“Will I know later which ones were altered or they won’t be different at all?”
“There’ll be… a kind of shine to them when you’ll think of them after that. It’s gonna be the only tell that they were touched by me. But I won’t change anything you don’t give your consent to.”
Bucky nods, having answered his biggest concerns about tomorrow. Now he feels like he trusts you completely and you’ll be the first person he can open his mind up to without a worry.
No matter how much you tried to get yourself ready for what you’d see in Bucky’s head, nothing could have prepared to the pain and darkness he had to endure during his oddly long human life. All the torture, the blood, the hurt and fear of death, it all comes down crashing on you even after the first session you have with him.
It breaks your heart that such a sweet soul had to go through Hell innocently and now he has to live with everything he was forced to do against his will. You can only hope that the people who did this to him have gotten their rightful punishment.
The first time the two of you sit down to start his treatment you get stuck in his head for hours, going through memories and altering them to take away anything that is connected to the trigger words. You witness the time he was captured and the first time he was sat into the chair that broke him. You can’t help the tears rolling down your face as you use all your power to change the memory and leave him with just a faded picture of his cell and held captive. Bucky asked you not to wipe them entirely, leave him with reminders of what made you be the way he is today and that’s exactly what you do.
When you finally come back you almost faint from exhaustion, Shuri catches you right in time before you could fall off the chair in front of Bucky’s who is equally dizzy, but he still manages to reach out and grab your hand to help you steady yourself. You feel drained and almost tortured, Bucky’s memories imprinting into your own head and you already know they will haunt you for quite some time. Not as long as your mother’s grief did, you were just a child back then and you couldn’t control your power that well, but even though you’ve learned to use your abilities, it will still take a couple of months for you to get rid of the horrors you saw in Bucky’s head.
Bucky sees how broken you look after just the first session and he doesn’t want to believe you’ll be strong enough to finish what you started.
“It’s fine,” you assure him when he asks you again in the evening if you surely want to continue. “I just have to rest and we can go on,” you tell him, giving his arm a squeeze before returning to your room.
That night, you wake from a burning nightmare with a scream, gripping onto the sheets with terror running through your veins. In your dream, you were the one strapped to that chair, going through all the pain Bucky had to bear decades ago. It was vivid and torturous and you know it’s going to return.
But you’re determined to finish the work and you do it over and over again, every day for the next couple of weeks. You go through all of Bucky’s darkest memories, altering and changing them until there’s nothing left from the Winter Soldier in him, just some faint and blurry pictures of him being held by his captors. You take all the pain and let it sink its claws into your own head, clouding your mind with darkness.
Bucky can feel the change in himself instantly after the first time you get into his head and a few days later he sleeps through the night for the first time in forever, oblivious to the fact that not far away from his room, you are fighting his demons every night so he can have his peace.
He is always the one to help you back into your room after an exhausting session and he wakes you up with breakfast in the mornings, always making your favorite. You tell him it’s not necessary, but he insists that this is the least he can do for everything you are doing for him, and he doesn’t even know the worst things you endure for his happiness.
He is always the one to request days off from the treatment, not for himself, but for you. He sees how trying it is and though you would never ask for time off, you don’t have to, because Bucky does it for you. Every third or fourth day he tells you he needs some time to heal and get used to his new mindset, but he just wants you to rest and recharge and though you know it too, you appreciate the gesture.
Some days he asks you to join him for walks just to get you out of the palace and you gladly say yes, desperately needing something to bring the light back into your life and it doesn’t take long to realize that Bucky is that light that can ease the heaviness of the pain you are fighting.
You love seeing his smile as the first thing in the morning, you love how he squeezes your hands every time before you dive into his head and how insists to carrying you to your room even when you’re perfectly capable of walking on your own. You love how chivalrous he is always, something Shuri told you was more common in the times he was born and you adore it that it’s a piece of his past self still present after everything he’s been through.
Bucky is the only one who can pull you out of the dark hole you’ve been stuck in and you promised yourself that you’ll never tell him the price you had to pay for his happiness, because he deserves every ounce of it and you wouldn’t want anything to cloud over it, not even your misery.
It takes five entire weeks to go through everything that turned him into the Winter Soldier and then the day to test if it has worked finally comes. Shuri has made sure to have a capsule ready for the test, one that would keep him under control in case you didn’t succeed and he would be triggered by the words he already knows too well.
“Are you sure I won’t hurt anyone?” Bucky asked cautiously as he was strapped into the capsule, a good majority of the Dora Milaje guarding the lab as well in case the test goes wrong, but both you and Shuri are optimistic about it.
“Calm down, Sergeant. We can handle you,” Shuri jokes before finishing up. “Alright, I’m gonna close this now, but you’ll be able to hear us and we’ll hear you as well,” she informs him and he just nods as she closes the capsule, securing him inside.
You sit on the side, but still close enough to see his face in the capsule. His icy blue stare finds yours and you give him a soft, encouraging smile. You do believe he won’t be triggered and not just because of what you did, but because he has a strong will and if there’s still any part of the Winter Soldier in him, he’ll be able to come over it.
“Okay, ready for the words?” Shuri asks him and breathing out he nods, closing his eyes, waiting for the inevitable.
“Желание,” comes the first word through a speaker and you hold your breath as you stare at his face through the capsule.
“Ржавый. Семнадцать,” the words carry on and you see him squeeze his eyes a little, fear taking over you that he might break, but it never happens. “Рассвет. Печь. Девять. Добросердечный…”
The trigger words ends and your lips part when his eyes open, noticing the tears in them as he finally realizes that he didn’t turn. The Winter Soldier is finally gone.
“Congratulations, Sergeant. You’re free,” Shuri announces as she opens the capsule and lets him out, sobs shaking from his chest before he is freed from the straps and able to step out of the capsule.
He is quick to rush over to you and wrap you in his embrace, both of you sobbing and crying and you hold onto him tight, as if he was just a memory that could vanish any moment, but he is there, flesh and metal, the Bucky you know and adore so much.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he keeps repeating as his vibranium fingers tangle into your hair at the back of your head.
It’s been over a week of freedom for Bucky and he hasn’t felt better in his life, well, not in this decade. Without the sessions, he now has quite some free time on his hands that he prefers to spend with you, actually.
The two of you have been joined at the hips since his recovery and not just because Bucky feels like he owes his life to you, but because you both can’t help falling for the other in the light of your newly found friendship that’s starting to slowly turn into more.
Bucky hasn’t been shy about showing his adoration and gratitude towards you, not after you’ve seen the darkest side of him and could still look at him the same way. He feels like he has bared his entire soul to you and you accepted it gladly, so there’s no need to beat around the bushes.
However you’ve been still trying to keep him away from the secret you’re hiding. He can’t find out about the nightmares, the screams and the tears you shed every night when his demons come for you. You can’t let him get close enough to see the price you paid for his own happiness. But even with all the cautions you’ve been keeping, you still can’t stop fate from finding its way.
One night Bucky is staying up late, binge watching a series Shuri has recommended for him. He didn’t intend to stay up so late, but before he could realize how fast the time has passed, it was already past two in the morning.
Shutting the laptop down he decides to get himself some water before finally going to sleep. Padding his way down the dark and quiet hallways in only a pair of sweatpants and a tank top, he unintentionally takes the route that goes past your room. He didn’t plan on dropping by, knowing you’re probably asleep by now, just wanted to feel that sense of closeness even in the middle of the night, but his original plans immediately change when he hears your deafening scream coming from the other side of the door.
His blood freezes in his veins and he is quick to turn into combat mode, ready to fight whatever is threatening your life, but as he pushes his way into your room he doesn’t find any intruder, it’s just you, curled up on your bed and even under the thick layer of covers, he can see how badly you’re shaking, your beautiful face churned into a painful frown as you keep your eyes shut.
He immediately realizes that you’re having a nightmare.
He rushes over to the bed and sits to the edge, the mattress dipping underneath his weight as he carefully places a hand to your trembling shoulder.
“Y/N! Y/N, wake up!” he softly shakes you, trying to get you back to consciousness, but you keep tossing and whimpering, a thin layer of sweat covering your skin.
“No, no, please! I’m not the Winter Soldier!” you cry out and Bucky freezes, his jaw clenching at your words, an eerie feeling running down his spine.
“Y/N, it’s just a dream, wake up!” he tries again and your eyes finally shoot open.
Though you’ve woken up, you don’t instantly see what’s really happening around you and you are quick to flinch away from Bucky, pushing yourself to the far end of the bed as you stare back at him with fearful, wide eyes.
“It’s just me. It’s alright, it’s me, Bucky,” he softly reminds you holding his hands up so you can see them. Your chest is heaving and your hands are gripping the sheets so tight, your knuckles are turning white.
“Bucky,” you breathe out and he nods.
“Yeah, it’s me. You had a bad dream, I heard you scream.”
Letting out a shaky breath you close your eyes and try to shake the vivid images that haunted you tonight out of your head, with not much success. Tonight you were beaten up in a cold and dark cell, the man kept telling you that you’re just a monster, a soulless nobody as he kept hitting you before he reached for a weapon that sent electricity through your body until it was too numb to move at your will.
You know it was one of his memories, because you’ve seen this scene before in his head and you remembered it clearly. Only that last time you saw it happen to him and now you were the victim.
“Fuck,” you breathe out, loosening your muscles as you gain your contact back with reality.
“What was the nightmare about?” he quietly asks and your gaze snaps up to meet his. You can’t read his icy blue eyes and for a moment you think about touching him so you could hear his thoughts, but you promised yourself you would never use your powers on him.
“Just… some nonsense stuff,” you lie shaking your head.
“Didn’t sound like that.”
“What do you mean?”
“I heard you beg to someone, telling them that you’re not the Winter Soldier.”
His face hardens as he inspects you while you try your best to hide anything that would tell him more about what you’ve been keeping from him.
“I don’t… I don’t remember it,” you shrug, scooting closer to him as you fix your pillows.
“Y/N, I don’t need superpowers to know that you’re lying,” he retorts and you almost flinch at his words. “Are you having nightmares because of what you saw… in my head?”
For a split second you think about lying. You think about telling him that it’s just because of what you saw and not tell him the real reason of your nightmares, but guilt has been already eating you away for not telling him and you wouldn’t be able to lie straight into his face. So you shake your head and your eyes meet his icy gaze again.
“I’m having… your nightmares.”
He looks confused, eyebrows knitted together as he is tasting your words, not entirely sure about what you meant by them, so you go into the details you’ve been keeping hidden from him.
“I can’t just take memories away and turn them into nothing, Bucky. Memories can only vanish if they get forgotten with time,” you start explaining, hoping you can paint the picture as realistic as possible. “When I changed your memories, I took parts away and… made them mine. And now I have to be the one to fight and forget them, but it happens faster for me than it would have happened to you,” you quickly add, as if it could make it any better.
“Why didn’t you tell me this is the cost of my recovery?” he snaps, clearly mad at you and he has every right, but you just wanted to save him. “I would have never let you do it if it meant you’d be the one to suffer for me, Y/N!”
“I had the chance to help you, I wanted to give you the freedom you deserve!” Tears are stinging your eyes as you stare at his harsh expression, the soft and joyful Bucky you’ve seen these past weeks is now gone.
“But it’s not worth it if you are being tortured by my memories now!”
“It was worth to me!” you snap back, a tear rolling down you cheek. “I might have been selfish for keeping you the details of what it would take to free you, but now you are the one who is being selfish, because you wouldn’t have let me help you if you knew and that’s exactly why I didn’t tell you! I chose to do it and I knew what I was getting myself into and I knew what it’s gonna cost.” More and more tears run down your heated cheeks, soaking your skin before they drop to your shirt or the sheets covering your lower half. Bucky stares back at you in disbelief as you reason about why you did it exactly. “You deserved this second chance and I was your only chance. If I didn’t do it for you, I would have had to live with the guilt forever that I let an innocent man suffer. It’s a small price for the happiness I was able to give you.”
Bucky is in total shock. He has had Steve do selfless shit for him plenty of times, hell, he wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for him, but what you did is just above everything that’s been ever done for him and he is having a hard time accepting that anyone would put up with so much pain and suffering for him willingly. He can’t decide if he wants to scream and shout at you for being so stupid or if he wants to fall to his knees and glorify your name till the end of times.
When you realize that he won’t snap at you again, you carefully scoot closer until you can reach out and touch his face, but you don’t even try to read his thoughts. Not this time. You let his thoughts wrapped in the darkness of the unknown. Bucky melts against your touch, his eyes fluttering closed for a few moments.
“You shouldn’t have done this, Y/N.”
“But I did,” you breathe out with a bitter chuckle. “And it can’t be undone, so you better accept it.”
He cracks a tiny smile, but it quickly vanishes as a thought pops into his head.
“If you have the memories that made me into the Winter Soldier, how come you don’t get triggered by the words?”
“I might own your memories now, but there’s a natural bond with the original owner that can’t be taken. It’s what makes them so vivid and real for you, but it will never be as real to me. The trigger words have no power over me, because the memories are not mine, I don’t have the bond with them.”
“But you still have the nightmares. My nightmares,” he breathes out, a hint of disappointment ringing through his tone, though you’re not sure if it’s because of what you did or because he couldn’t stop you from it.
“They will go away,” you assure him, but you can tell that his guilt is eating him away. “Bucky, I’ll be fine. A few weeks, at max a month and they will be gone. I promise you.”
“You don’t deserve this,” he mumbles under his breath as his hand reaches for yours, squeezing it gently before he brings it to his lips and kisses your knuckles softly. “You don’t deserve any of it.”
“But you deserve happiness,” you reply with a chaste smile that makes his heart flutter in his chest. “Let me give it to you. You’ve had enough pain, Bucky. I’ll take the rest now.”
Bucky stares back at you for a long second before he decides to do whatever he can to make sure you get through it as easily as possible. Pulling the covers back he slides under them, lying down next to you as he pulls you into his embrace.
“Go back to sleep and if you’ll have another nightmare, I’ll be here to wake you up from it and get your mind off of it. You’re safe with me,” he murmurs, as you lay your head to his hard chest, his flesh arm curling around your frame while his vibranium fingers lace together with yours on his stomach. You don’t try to protest against him, you know he won’t leave and quite frankly, you don’t want him to. Knowing that if you go back to the darkness again he’ll be here to pull you out relaxes you, doesn’t let you worry about what kind of horrific scene you are going to be forced to see when you close your eyes next. You melt against him, inhaling his scent, listening to his steady heartbeat under your head as you let yourself go back to sleep, for the first time, ready to face whatever is waiting for you on the other side.
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!
#bucky#bucky barnes#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes au#sebastian stan oneshot#sebastian stan one shot
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Jaune: Zero to Hero
Pyrrha: It's not about why; it's about knowing. Understanding dark and light helps us manifest our Aura. Everyone has some of both.
Knowledge, Creation and Destruction all lead up to Aura. This is just another way to say that they lead up to individuality, which is something Grimms lack:
Pyrrha: They are creatures of Grimm, the manifestation of anonymity.
Individuality is conveyed through Choice. This is why Choice is the most important and final gift. It is symbolic of self-actualization, which is what our characters are pursuing in their coming of age story.
Jaune’s personal arc comments the group’s collective journey and marks each stage very clearly.
In which way does it happen? And what do these stages mean for Jaune’s growth as an individual?
THE IGNORANT WARRIOR
Pyrrha: Jaune, do you... know what Aura is?
Jaune: Psch! Of course I do! Do you know what Aura is?
Jaune is introduced as inexperienced and ignorant. He lacks combat experience and knows nothing about key concepts like Aura, Landing Strategy or Semblances.
His journey starts because Pyrrha shares her knowledge with him:
She awakens his aura, his very soul and later on trains him, so she helps his body get stronger:
In other words, Pyrrha is the one who puts Jaune on the right path to become a true “hero” and a “warrior”.
This is Jaune’s objective since the beginning, but he initially pursues it in the wrong way:
Jaune: I don't want help! I don't want to be the damsel in distress! I want to be the hero!
He is fixated on an idea of hero which is outdated and has its root in toxic masculinity:
Jaune: Cause this is always what I've wanted to be! My father, my grandfather, and his father before him were all warriors! They were all heroes! I wanted to be one, too. I was just never good enough.
This is why symbolically Jaune wants to be like his male ancestors. He wants to grow into “a real man”:
Cardin: Let's see how much of a man you really are...
And this is conveyed also through his Weapon:
Jaune: It's a hand-me-down. My great-great-grandfather used it to fight in the war.
Jaune did not forge his own Weapon, but he inherited it. Crocea Mors initially represents the legacy he wants to live up to. However, this legacy, instead of driving him, slows him down because he can’t grow until he remains in his ancestors’ shadow. Jaune needs to develop his own individuality instead.
In order to do so, he needs to grow not only as a figther, but as a person too.
As a matter of fact, Jaune’s ignorance is not only limited to the world he has stepped into, but also to the people around him:
Jaune: That's easy for you to say. You've probably got guys clamoring over each other just to ask you out.
Pyrrha: You'd be surprised.
He is so self-focused that he does not notice others’ feelings and hurts them unintentionally.
However, Pyrrha teaches him once again:
Pyrrha:Tell her exactly what you said. No ridiculous schemes, no pick-up lines. Just... be honest.
It is thanks to her that Jaune manages to become a better man:
He is even able to call Neptune out the way Pyrrha did with him:
Jaune: Then just go talk to her. No pickup lines, no suave moves, just be yourself. I've heard that's the way to go.
And as a result, even Jaune’s relationship with Weiss gets better:
Weiss: You said you were embarrassed at first. What made you come talk to me?
Neptune: You're looking at him. You got some good friends looking out for ya.
Because the girl realizes Jaune is not only after her money or her romantic attention:
Weiss: All my life, boys have only cared about the perks of my last name.
But wants to genuinely be a good friend to her.
In short, Jaune starts the story as immature both as a fighter and as a person to the point that he is considered unfit and annoying by other characters:
Glynda: I don't care what his transcripts say. That Jaune fellow is not ready for this level of combat.
However, thanks to Pyrrha, he is given the chance to mature.
Not only that, but while other characters see a weakness and a nuisance in Jaune’s ignorance and inexperience, Pyrrha sees it as a possibility:
Weiss: Jaune, is it? Do you have any idea who you're talking to?
Jaune: Not in the slightest, snow angel.
Weiss: This is Pyrrha.
It is specifically because Jaune is new to Pyrrha’s world that he is free from bias:
Pyrrha: That's what I like about you. When we met, you didn't even know my name. You treated me just like anyone else. And thanks to you, I've made friendships that will last a lifetime. I guess, you're the kind of guy I wish I was here with. Someone who just saw me for me.
This is why Pyrrha feels she can forge a genuine bond with Jaune. What is more, the girl has faith in his potential:
Pyrrha: It's all right. I used my Aura to unlock yours, but the energy that protects you now is your own. You have a lot of it.
She sees in him what others do not and helps him develop both as a man and as a warrior.
This is well highlighted by the metal motif the two characters share.
As @hamliet explains here Rwby has several characters linked to the seven metals of alchemy.
The goal of alchemy is to create gold thanks to a process of refiniment that purifies the metal and has it go through several transformations.
The seven metals are nothing, but a scale that goes from the heaviest and most raw metal (lead) to the most purified (gold) passing through the others (tin, iron, copper, mercury, silver).
For a story, it simply means that a character goes through a process of change that leads to self-actualization.
In Rwby this idea is conveyed through specific characters embodying a metal (Ironwood, Penny, Mercury) or even thanks to metal motifs commenting a specific part of a character arc.
For example, Yang is associated with gold:
I am the golden one Who burns just like the sun
But Adam takes her arm away and has her regress in the scale of metals to iron. This regression is not simply physical, but psychological as well:
However, Yang re-affirms herself and moves forward. The first step of this process is to symbolically make her new arm “gold” again:
When it comes to Jaune, I think that he may be the character associated with lead aka the “prima materia” that needs to be molded into gold. Even if this is not true, metal is at least definately still a motif in his arc, as it is in Pyrrha’s. This is why both characters wear metal armors, differently from others.
Pyrrha is already close to her self-actualization and she reaches it in the climax of the Vale arc, where she completes her (tragic) arc and dies a Maiden.
This is why her armor is gold, while Jaune’s is white and gray. Pyrrha is at the top of the metal scale and close to the end of her journey, while Jaune is respectively at the very bottom and at the very beginning.
He is the embodyment of the prima materia that has potential for greatness, but only if he is rightly guided and if he himself works hard.
Pyrrha takes over herself the duty to help Jaune mold himself.
This is underlined also by Pyrrha’s semblance:
Pyrrha: Well, Ruby has her speed, you have your glyphs. My Semblance is polarity.
Pyrrha can control and bend metals and she shows her power for the first time when she helps Jaune against the Ursa, so that he can overcome his self-issues.
So, Jaune starts the story as the lead and is going through a path of self-refinement which will lead him to become gold, so more similar to Pyrrha herself.
Pyrrha offers him the basic knowledge to start this journey, but unluckily leaves him too soon and now Jaune has to move forward on his own.
THE CREATIVE AVENGER
Pyrrha: I want you to know that I'm just happy to be a part of your life. I'll always be here for you, Jaune.
Even after Pyrrha’s death, this stays true:
Blacksmith: That was some fine metal you brought me. Accents the white nicely. Where'd you get it from?
Pyrrha has become a part of Jaune.
This is a recurring motif in Rwby:
Penny: I won’t be gone, I’ll be part of you.
It is the idea that grieving is a process that leads to acceptance, but also to integration with a lost one. It is a way to have the deceased keep on living through the survivors.
In Jaune and Pyrrha’s case, this is conveyed through Pyrrha’s metal being used to enrich Jaune’s Weapon.
As stated by Ruby:
Ruby: Just weapons? They're an extension of ourselves! They're a part of us! Oh, they're so cool.
Weapons are symbolic of the self, just like Semblances.
What is more, Weapons and Semblances are also a declination of the dychotomy of body and soul, presented by the series.
Weapons are wielded by bodies, while Semblances are a materialization of the soul.
In other words, Pyrrha’s gold becoming a part of Jaune’s Weapon is symbolic of Jaune’s first step in a painful process that will lead him to overcome his partner’s death and to inherit Pyrrha’s legacy.
Jaune must keep on learning from Pyrrha and become more like her. As noted by @hamliet, this is symbolized also by Jaune’s design aquiring more golden details as he goes on in his journey:
Jaune: Guess I was going to grow out of it eventually.
Ren: A sign of progress.
Jaune: Progress.
That said, grieving is not easy and Jaune must struggle with much pain and negative feelings.
This is why the changes he makes to Crocea Mors are finalized to increase its attack power:
It is because Jaune feels anger over Pyrrha’s death and wants revenge.
In the Battle of Haven he gives in to his fury and tries to kill Cinder. He is trying to superficially imitate Pyrrha’s sacrifice:
Jaune: If I die buying them time, then it's worth it. They're the ones that matter.
However, he is not doing it out of bravery or necessity, but out of recklessness and self-hate. This is why his actions lead to this:
Once again, Jaune risks to lose another loved one:
Jaune: No, no, no, no, not again! Weiss, c'mon, please!!
However, this time he is able to save Weiss thanks to his Semblance:
Jaune: My Semblance?
Nora: How else do you think you're healing her, dummy?
Jaune gives up on using his Weapon to fight and chooses to use his Semblance to cure. He chooses soul over body and Creation over Destruction.
At the same time, Jaune’s activation of his Semblance is meaningful on two levels:
Jaune: No. I don't think I'm healing her. Our Aura heals our bodies. It feels... it feels more like I'm using my Aura to amplify hers!
Nora: Wait, aren't you worried about running out?
Jaune: Pyrrha once told me I've got a lot of it. I still believe her.
First of all, Jaune’s Semblance is rooted in the idea that people heal themselves. His power is not to cure others, but to amplify others’ auras, so that they can become stronger and can heal. It is about bringing out the best in others. It is a power fit for a leader, but also an ability symbolic of Jaune’s own process of healing. He can heal himself through helping others to heal.
Secondly, Jaune’s Semblance is in itself a nod to Pyrrha. Pyrrha used her own aura to awake his and Aura Amp is simply an evolution of this idea. It is not about activating others’ auras, but it is a power that lets Jaune share his. It also makes good use of something Pyrrha noticed immediately aka Jaune’s huge quantity of aura.
In other words, Jaune ends up acting like Pyrrha in the Battle of Haven, but not because he fights Cinder, but because he shares his gift with others, just like Pyrrha did with hers.
Pyrrha is a part of Jaune both in body (Crocea Mors) and soul (Aura Amp), but Jaune must still truly understand what this means.
He makes progress in Lost:
Red-Haired Woman: She understood that she had a responsibility... to try. I don't think she would regret her choice, because a Huntress would understand that there really wasn't a choice to make. And a Huntress is what she always wanted to be.
This is the essence of Pyrrha’s sacrifice. Jaune comes to understand it and chooses to make a similar choice together with his team:
Jaune: I think... I think she knew she wasn't going to win. That she might not come out alive. But... she also knew she was the only one that could try.
Ren: So she did.
Nora: Maybe we should too.
Jaune: Yeah, we should.
In this way, it will be as if Pyrrha were fighting together with them:
Nora: Pyrrha may not be by our side anymore, but we can fight like she is.
Jaune: And in a way... she will be.
Jaune tries to overcome his anger and his sadness for Pyrrha’s death in order to keep fighting like she did.
So, once again he chooses this:
Ruby: I wanted to protect my friends.
Maria: Precisely! It is the desire to preserve life which fuels the light inside you. And to make no mistake, it is light. Preservation is an extension of creation, or, at the very least, an enemy of destruction. The Creatures of Grimm were made by the God of Darkness, but your light comes from his brother.
He chooses to protect life and this is the essence of Creation.
Once he confirms this choice, he is free to explore Creation’s potential and he does so in the land of Creation itself, Atlas.
He strengthens his shield instead of his sword:
And he trains his Semblance:
Oscar: Nice, your recovery is getting faster.
This all leads him to become stronger psychologically:
Ren: Him on the other hand... There's no fear at all. I can see it, he believes we're going to get this done.
That said, Jaune starts meeting limits to his new found strength rooted in Creation:
Jaune: Ah, sorry. No matter how much I boost you, they won’t go away.
Jaune: Did... I stop the virus?
Penny: No. It’s still there.
Jaune’s way to move forward is to heal himself through healing others. Still, what to do when this is not possible?
THE DESTRUCTIVE HEALER
Penny: No… there’s not enough time to heal me…
Penny: But there is something you can do…
What happens in Atlas is an inversion of Haven.
Penny pushes Jaune’s Semblance away and touches Crocea Mors.
Jaune is asked to give up on healing her and to speed up her death instead. He is asked to choose his Weapon (body) over his Semblance (soul) and Destruction over Creation.
This marks the characters entering the Destruction phase:
Leaving Creation (Penny) behind.
For Jaune, this means that his own self image that he has worked so much to build and to make his own:
And that has been enriched in Anima thanks to Pyrrha...is shattered:
At the same time, he is once again put in a similar spot as Pyrrha:
They both become unwilling agents of Penny’s death because of Cinder (and Emerald and Mercury in the first case):
Pyrrha: Ruby, I... I'm so sorry.
Ruby: Me too. But it wasn't your fault.
Jaune: She's right. Whoever was on that microphone... they're the ones that did this. And we have to make sure they don't take anyone else.
So Jaune’s journey to integrate with Pyrrha, to understand her and her struggle continues.
What now?
It is too soon to say because we have yet to properly start our journey through Destruction and what it is about.
That said, there are two things that are worth highlighting. The first is a motif Rwby is following, while the second is a general theme found in many stories.
1) As @hamliet has stated in many metas and as I have written here, Rwby is an alchemical story. Alchemical stories are usually marked by three important deaths. Each death is symbolically linked to a color. They are usually black, white and red. However, sometimes there can be yellow instead of the white or the red. This is the case here, where a resonant death is the yellow death aka Penny’s.
It is a death that happens while the characters are surrounded by yellow:
And it happens through a weapon called “Yellow Death” (Crocea Mors’s meaning). So, it is really not subtle. Penny’s death is meant to mark an important passage for our protagonists, just like Pyrrha’s one (the black death).
2) It is common in stories that deal with healers to explore the concept of death as well.
The basic idea is that a healer is a person meant to cure. That said, they will meet people impossible to cure and that will die on their watch. This is an unescapable truth a true healer must live with.
Let’s highlight this theme is found in works very different for genre and culture.
Let’s have two examples.
Scrubs aka an American comedy about doctors deals with this theme multiple times. In many episodes the characters must simply accept they can’t save a life, but must still not lose hope and keep on living themselves.
Yosano from the manga BSD says so:
Her backstory explores the link bewteen life and death further since it is shown that a power that cures fatal wounds can be used to cheapen life itself:
It is too soon to say if Rwby will explore a similar theme, but the fact that Jaune, (the healer) is the one that has to speed up Penny’s death might be a very powerful and poignant choice. This is true especially because Rwby does not refuse Destruction (and so does not refuse death), but presents it as a principle equal to Creation (so as a part of life).
THE CHOOSING HERO
Jaune’s arc is about living Pyrrha’s death over and over again with different scenarios and outcomes. This happens so that in the end he can finally overcome it.
So far, it has happened three times and each time has been in the climax of an important battle.
The Battle of Beacon has him witness powerlessly to Pyrrha’s death (lack of knowledge and passivity).
The Battle of Haven has him saving Weiss (creation).
The Battle of Atlas has him killing Penny (destruction).
What is more, every time Jaune becomes more proactive and conscious of what he is doing.
In Beacon he has no idea of what is happening. He works with little information and things happen to him without him being able to do anything.
In Haven his actions lead to Weiss being in danger, but he manages to save her. That said, he does not do it consciously. He unlocks his Semblance because of emotional stress. It is an unconscious choice and not a conscious one.
In Atlas he makes a specific conscious choice, but it is a choice that is forced on him because of external circumstances. It is also a choice that is meant to challenge and temporally break him.
In other words, he is slowly and painfully approaching Choice aka self-actualization. Right now, he has to face the consequences of Penny’s death, but this will probably lead him to finally enter the Choice stage and to complete his arc by becoming a “hero” aka gold (probably).
At the same time, this final choice will also be about healing and overcoming grief. It will be the final integration with Pyrrha and him being able to honor her legacy.
After all, we have been told from the beginning what Pyrrha’s fate would have been. We’ve just failed to notice:
Pyrrha: For it is in passing that we achieve immortality. Through this, we become a paragon of virtue and glory to rise above all, infinite in distance and unbound by death. I release your soul, and by my shoulder protect thee.
June and Pyrrha’s bond is eternal and she is meant to be the key character in Jaune’s arc. It is only through confronting and finally overcoming her loss that Jaune can finally self actualize and become the person Pyrrha has always known he could be. Pyrrha will symbolically be with him in this struggle. Her memory will protect and inspire him.
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Jung Hoseok and the Magic to Happiness | 02
; Hufflepuff Teacher!Hoseok x Reader
; Genre: Fluff, future angst, future smut
; Word Count: 6.5k
; Synopsis: An unexpected issue with your Ministry of Magic job leads to you taking the role of Transfiguration Professor at Hogwarts. It’s here that you meet your best friend’s younger brother for the first time in years, the Hufflepuff Head of House, Jung Hoseok. While you contend with seeing him once again, Hoseok tries to show you that he’s very much a man and no longer the gangly teenager you once knew.
; A/N: After almost three months of no writing...I finished this chapter :) I hope you enjoy...please leave me feedback in the form of comments or an ask. The long break has made me worry about a bit about whether people will even read my stuff anymore lol
Last Chapter ; Next Chapter
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The next two months pass by with only a few growing pains in terms of teaching. You’d discovered pretty quickly that a group of twenty students could easily turn into pure and utter chaos. Particularly when one of them accidentally turns another into a turnip.
That had not been the best first-week experience if you were being honest.
There had been a few minutes when you’d been convinced
But you were certainly getting used to everything. It was odd being on the other side now, being the one who commanded attention from the students. You had an almost desperate need to be liked by them at first, but the other professors had quickly dissuaded you from that. They were not your friends, and you’d learnt that if you gave them an inch then they’d take a mile.
It had been pleasant though, and you were certainly enjoying everything. There was nothing better than the smile on a student’s face when they got a spell right, with the knowledge that you’d been the one to teach them that.
The comments you’d been told on your first note about the house stereotypes had also proven to be true. You’d never seen so many Slytherin’s chatting happily with Gryffindor’s and so forth. Whole friendship groups were made up of varying houses and none appeared to be left out. Nor had you seen any house related bullying as there had been in your day.
Once typical insults of a Slytherin being home to a Death Eater had vanished for the most part. The one time you had seen it, hurled by a Hufflepuff of all things, had resulted in complete outrage amongst all the students. It had warmed your heart to see the younger generations working in far better harmony than yours or your previous generations ever had.
Chaeyoung had become the equivalent of your work best friend, bringing her marking over to your office and spending time chatting happily with you. Seokjin had also become a close friend or at least as close as someone could get in only two months. The two of them were fascinating, coming from vastly different lifestyles.
Her family were practically magical royalty in France, though she’d moved to the UK whilst only a child to live with her grandparents after the deaths of her parents. As such, she’d ended up attending Hogwarts and had been in the year below Hoseok. Despite her initial French upbringing, she had no hint of an accent though she’d spouted fluent French to you when you’d queried her language abilities.
She also spoke Spanish, which had led to her initially getting a job as a translator at a magical exporting company. It had amused you thoroughly that it had been based in Devon, along the southern coast of England with France just over the narrow Channel Sea. Chaeyoung had laughed at the time, acknowledging that the mild weather was much nicer than the temperamental mistress you had to contend with here in northern Scotland.
It hadn’t proven to her liking though, and she’d soon ended up applying for the vacant History of Magic position. She’d been quick to explain that she’d taken up an extra qualification in her chosen area and that she wasn’t just randomly picked. You knew from Jisoo that muggles had a different way to education, but there were no real universities here in the wizarding world.
Chaeyoung studied hard enough and was very knowledgeable about her chosen area, so you didn’t see too much issue regarding it. And she was a popular teacher, helping to turn a subject that many would often find dull into something fun and interesting.
Seokjin, on the other hand, was older than you. He was 36, with a wife of ten years and two young sons. He’d trained in astronomy in the Ministry and had brought his skills to Hogwarts three years ago. You’d ended up bonding together over your dual experiences in the Ministry; both lamenting over the different departments and positions you’d had yet the same bureaucratic headaches.
He was a joyful sort with a smile always on his face for you and his students along with a genuine passion for the stars and the universe. You knew that he made it a goal to read much of what the muggles were doing, his fascination with the fact that they’d been to space bordering on an almost obsession.
It was no surprise to you that these have been the two that you had ended up so close with. Both had the experience of working outside of Hogwarts and that seemed to make you all different from the other professors. Everyone else had interned here immediately after finishing before taking on their chosen role.
Jimin came from a long line of auror wizards and witches that stretched back centuries. This meant that he had extensive knowledge of the Dark Arts inherited from their wise teachings. His mother and father still worked in the Ministry, which meant that he’d slipped into the Defence Against the Dark Arts position with ease.
Which was a good thing as it had remained an awkward position after the Second Wizarding War. It was a role that was often hard to fill as some many witches and wizards felt that it would be best to ignore that the Dark Arts even existed. If no one knew about the Dark Arts, and all the horrific violence and devastation that had occurred with them, then there wouldn’t be any need to defend it.
That was, of course, a most ridiculous idea and Hogwarts had firmly resisted any such attempts to whitewash both the history and the concept of the Dark Arts. By not acknowledging what happened, and teaching to both understand why it happened alongside how to protect against it, then it would just happen again.
But it remained an exceptionally unpopular position due to the intimate knowledge of the Dark Arts required. To know how best to protect against the Dark spells, you had to know what the Dark spells were.
You had experienced at least three professors during your tenure as a student.
That had all changed five years ago though when Park Jimin had finally taken over when his predecessor had packed it all in to go and study the famous dragons in Romania. The handsome silver-haired professor was young, but he had won over the staff of the prestigious school with his astonishingly good spellwork.
The fact that he had also made short work of their hearts was because he was also incredibly good looking, much to his benefit when it came to dating you were sure.
Jimin wasn’t just a pretty face though; he was the best dueller in the school. From what you’d been told, he had yet to be bested. Which honestly, was to be expected from someone with such a prestigious bloodline as his.
But not only that, he’d proven to be sweet and kind to his students with a backbone of steel as well. While there may be no true bad blood between houses now, Slytherin still garnered an air of suspicion from other houses even to this day.
Given the preponderance of dark witches and wizards that the house had produced over the years, it was a well-earnt suspicion, unfortunately. Still, you didn’t believe that the bad decisions and choices made by people long ago should have any bearing on your current students; all of them born long after those terrible events.
Jimin had proven to be an excellent example of why you should never stereotype people based on what others had done. In your opinion, he was an exceptional teacher and had taken on the helm of the Defence Against the Dark Arts role with the clear mindset of not only helping to protect his students but also to try and prevent them from making poor choices.
It was a tough subject to teach as it meant constantly walking a narrow line while also steering students true through narrow and murky waters. There were plenty of students who might find themselves a little too fascinated in the concept of the Dark Arts, after all.
According to Chaeyoung, Jimin tried to combat this by making sure to teach them about the history of the Dark Arts. From what you understood, he held no punches in making sure they all knew the horrific acts of murder and sacrifice that had been committed to preventing students from romanticising a dark part of wizarding history.
Not only that, but he made sure to teach about the most infamous dark wizards in history; the Death Eaters and Voldemort. This was all to ensure that they did not repeat the mistakes of the past. He took his role seriously, whether it was through spellwork or simply enriching the minds.
Despite his relative youth, you’d come to know him as passionate and hard-working with a true love for his students. Whether they be in Slytherin or Gryffindor. It was just one of the many things that you had come to grow to love about Hogwarts in your short time here so far, the way the school had adapted and grown so quickly.
Hogwarts was a castle that had been built from stone carved centuries ago and housed ancient treasures of the wizarding world, but the Battle of Hogwarts had been a turning point for many. No longer did it constantly look at the past with pure pride, and to many - ignorance, but instead looked to the future as well.
It sought to teach well-rounded wizards and witches that would enrich the community. Which meant it had attempted to modernise itself as much as it could. Of course, it didn’t match the sparkling modernity of steel and technology that the muggle world had developed over the last two centuries but it was improving itself and working to develop new magics that would mirror some of the advancements that the muggles had made.
Perhaps the only thing you’d found a little awkward to embrace was teaching itself. You’d been eager to begin but had quickly realised that teaching was much more complicated than you’d imagined. For all of the good things that Hogwarts was doing lately, it seemed odd to you that they didn’t even bother teaching their professors to teach.
A few discussions with some of the others had revealed that they also had this issue when they’d started. It seemed to have been easier for those who hadn’t spent too much time away from the school after they’d graduated but it had been a long time since you’d been schooled here. Teaching methods had changed and you’d struggled to maintain a healthy balance of actually teaching, answering questions to help students, having open hours to encourage students who were struggling to have extra tuition and finding time to mark the essays that you handed out.
In short, it had been a very steep learning curve for yourself. Thankfully, your students had given you the benefit of the doubt, which meant they’d been very accepting of any mistakes you’d made. You’d also worked with the other professors to establish a good teaching plan for each of your lessons while also cross-referencing to ensure students weren’t loaded with too much homework.
It was more work than you’d expected, which made you understand how naive you’d been. But you found it to be satisfying work and the reward of seeing students learn and retain their knowledge throughout their lessons was better than anything you’d done in your previous job. And that was to say nothing about the pure wonder and joy on the faces of the first-year students when you had begun their education.
Underlying all of your experiences so far though was one Jung Hoseok. Whilst you’d become quick friends with Seokjin and Chaeyoung, Hoseok was a strange enigma to you. He was friendly and always willing to help you whenever you got confused over something or were feeling a little stressed.
His job as the Care of Magical Creatures professor meant that you rarely saw him during school hours. A large portion of his time was spent outside in the Forbidden Forest or in the custom-built buildings that housed many of the fantastical creatures that he cared for. You knew that he did have a classroom though. It wasn’t anywhere near yours but it held a lot of the smaller creatures that didn’t do so well in the Scottish climate.
Hoseok’s commitment to his job was commendable as he often spent a lot of hours outside. Which meant that as the months slowly shifted to winter, he was finding himself in the cold and rain a lot more often than not.
More than once, you’d spotted him outside when peeking through one of your classroom windows and noted him completely drenched as the rain poured down. It made you cringe each time you saw it, knowing that his robes would be heavy with water. But he never complained about it, even though he was the only professor who also had to work on the weekends.
On top of that, he was also busy with being the Head of Hufflepuff. From what you understood from your talks with Jimin, it meant always being available outside of learning hours for his House students. Whether they wanted to talk about a problem they had or simply needed advice, he was there to help them with whatever they needed.
It also meant that he had to attend every Quidditch game, and you wondered how he managed to cope with such a full schedule. You felt exhausted after a week of just your normal work but knowing how much extra he put in was mind-blowing.
Despite this though, you’d noticed over time that Hoseok always made sure to be present for every meal in the Great Hall. And much like the first meal you’d shared at the top table, he always sat next to you. You hadn’t thought anything of it until Seokjin had casually mentioned one day while you’d been at Hogsmeade with him and Chaeyoung that he’d never sat in that place before.
His old spot was actually on the other side of the table, next to Taehyung and Jimin. Seokjin hadn’t even thought anything of his comment but it had caused you to pause, wondering why Hoseok had felt the need to change his position. At the time, you’d simply shrugged and pointed out that you’d known him when he was younger and that his sister was your best friend.
It only made sense that he wanted to be there to help you out and make sure you were okay.
But that excuse started to falter when you thought about the fact that he never mentioned Jisoo to you. Hoseok didn’t mention anything of the past that you both shared. Instead, he would talk about Hogwarts now and your jobs or ask about what life was like at the Ministry when you’d been there. Those topics often led off onto little tangents and you’d both find yourselves chattering away with each other as the meals went on.
The others would get involved too when they could, but there was something...singular about Hoseok’s focus. And that was to say nothing of how he always made sure to walk you back to your quarters after dinner. There was never much talk that happened then, instead, the two of you simply enjoyed the architecture and decoration of Hogwarts as you found different ways to get back, the company exquisite in its silence.
A comfortable silence that you hadn’t found with many other people.
Chaeyoung was convinced that Hoseok liked you. You’d tried to debunk that theory by pointing out that he’d fancied you when he was younger and it was probably just the allure of an older girl who was more accessible to him than others. You were always around given your friendship with his sister and he’d probably just transferred his teenage hormones onto you at the time.
If anything, he was probably embarrassed about how obvious he was back then. Poor Hoseok had never been subtle in anything.
Despite your defence, Chaeyoung had simply given you a look that you hadn’t been able to interpret. Nor did you understand the subtle glances and smirks that she exchanged with Seokjin whenever Hoseok sat next to you at the dining table. It was like there was a silent conversation happening between the two of them about you, only you weren’t included in it.
Thankfully, you weren’t the type of person to be too influenced by other’s thoughts and opinions. So you didn’t let Chaeyoung’s opinion on the subject impact upon your burgeoning friendship with Hoseok. So even though there was a voice in the back of your mind telling you that there was something more, you ignored it and chose not to ruin the fledgeling friendship you had.
You’d felt a sense of relief though that Chaeyoung had been too busy with marking papers to attend dinner last night, which meant that she hadn’t been able to overhear your conversation with Hoseok last night. The two of you had been discussing his lesson plans for the next few weeks and what creatures his students were going to be studying.
He’d suddenly gotten an odd look on his face before grinning. If there was one thing you had learnt upon being back at Hogwarts, it was that Hoseok’s smile was perhaps one of the prettiest things you’d ever seen. Which was why you’d smiled back at him immediately, even though you had no idea what he was so happy about.
But he hadn’t made you wait and had instead asked if you were tonight. You’d acknowledged it and confusion had been written all over your face but he’d just given an enigmatic shrug. All he’d said after that was to meet him at the entrance of the Forbidden Forest an hour after dinner.
Which was why you were now standing in the dark. Your robes were wrapped tightly around you but it did nothing to stop the way you shivered, jaw tight as a cold wind rushed through the trunks of the trees before you. Part of you wanted to run back to the castle if only to grab your winter coat, but you didn’t want to look like you’d stood Hoseok up.
Though you did wish he’d turn up quicker rather than later.
Huddling under your cloak more, you clasped the edges together with your hands and pushed it up to cover your mouth and nose. It didn’t do a whole lot against the cold, but it was better than being exposed to it. Even though the wind wasn’t strong, it was still enough to cause your robes to flap, the sound loud against the quiet of the grounds.
The only other sound right now was the wind as it howled through the Forbidden Forest, making the already dark and ominous area look even scarier. Even though you were now an adult, there was an underlying fear of the forest before you. Perhaps it was because it had been firmly ingrained in you as a student that this area was off-limits or something.
Still, you wouldn’t want to go walking around in it on your own anytime soon.
The sight of the trees suddenly moving ahead of you made you gasp quietly, body freezing in position as you squinted to try and see what it had been. You knew that the forest was full of many magical creatures; not all of them gentle and kind.
Swallowing hard, you stayed in place to try and avoid attention, gaze skittering around as you tried to find that shape once more. A branch cracking caused you to flinch, your hands tightening into fists around the material of your cloak and you had to clench your jaw to stop any noise from escaping.
The black shape formed once more ahead of you and you almost shrieked in fright, getting ready to run away until you saw a sudden flash of brighter colour. Frowning, you let your hands unclasp themselves until you realised it was a yellow scarf and realisation flooded through your body.
“Bloody hell!” You cursed, the syllables being spat with indignation. Hoseok looked up in surprise, his own eyes widening in surprise before concern etched itself onto his face when he saw the dual outrage and fear on you. Striding forward, you met him just as he was about to cross over the boundary of the trees onto the grounds of the castle and poked at this chest, a scowl on your face.
“You didn’t think to warn me you were going to be coming from the forest! Merlin’s beard, I almost ran away because I was afraid it was something that was going to hurt me.” Hissing at him, you realised belatedly that you had to look up to him to do this. Damn him and his growth spurt.
Still, he at least had the decency to look a little sheepish.
“Sorry, I didn’t think it might seem a little scary. I was just coming back from checking on the centaurs; I haven’t been able to meet them in a while and wanted to see if they were okay.” His explanation was logical but it still made you scowl.
“Why aren’t you carrying a light or something?! Do you always just gallivant around the Forbidden Forest in the dark? Aren’t there dangerous things here?” You pepper him with the questions quickly, each one causing his brow to rise higher incrementally. It’s a good job that it’s dark because you don’t notice the way the corner of his lips quirks up in amusement at your tirade.
“I don’t use one in there, not normally. I know my way around very well. I have worked in this forest for years now. But I do have lanterns dotted around in case I need one and I can always use a lumos spell, like now. I figured you wouldn’t want to journey in the dark.” At that, he pulls his wand out of a pocket in his robes and mutters the spell, the tip lighting up with bright white.
Narrowing your eyes at the sudden influx of light, you’re momentarily startled by just how handsome Hoseok looks in the light. It casts an almost blue glow to him, his normally sun-kissed skin looking paler than you’ve ever seen it before. The shadows on his face only serve to highlight the sharp angles of his features while his eyes almost glitter.
It’s only then that you realise you’re staring, quickly averting your gaze away and focusing them on your hands instead. At that moment, another harsh wind blows through and you shiver in response, your shoulders lifting as you try to curl in on yourself.
Gripping your cloak once more, you’re too distracted to notice what Hoseok is doing. The only sign is the light going a little wonky for a few moments before you’re startled by the sudden feeling of softness on your neck.
Letting out a small ‘eep’ of surprise, you jerk away only to see Hoseok staring at you with wide eyes, his scarf no longer wrapped around his neck and instead being held out to you. The Hufflepuff colours look washed out in the odd light and you pause, giving him a confused look as you glance between the scarf and him.
Brows raised, he lifts the item before giving you a slow smile. “You’re cold. You can wear this if you want. It’s not as chilly in the forest but I don’t want you to get poorly because of it. I should have warned you, sorry.”
It seems like all he’s done is apologise so far and it makes you feel bad, causing you to nod your head and take the scarf from him. Wrapping it around your neck, you immediately feel a little warmer and you can’t help but take a deep inhale of the scent woven into the soft fibres. It’s a more concentrated form of what you get to smell every meal time; citrus and something with a slight hint of spice.
For a second, you wonder if it’s a cologne it’s bought himself or if perhaps it’s something a woman bought for him. It suits him, either way.
“Are you ready? You don’t have to come if you’re feeling uncomfortable or anything…” Hoseok trails off, biting his lip in an almost nervous way that makes you feel a little odd. Pushing the thought away, you hum and glance behind him into the forest. Your curiosity was too much and so you nodded firmly, giving him a gentle smile before gesturing for him to start walking.
Without another word, he turns around and begins to walk once more. You notice casually that he’s following a path cut into the forest, the ground level and even compared to the wildness all around you. Alongside the sound of your boots on the dirt, you realise that there are a few other noises all around you.
The gentle hoot of an owl is overwhelmed by a shriek far away, causing a chill to run up your spine. Shuffling forward a little quicker, you almost reach out to Hoseok as a tinge of fear takes over. As if he can tell, he turns around and gives you a concerned look.
“What was that?” Whispering, you glance around and wonder if you should talk loudly. Hoseok looks in the same direction as you do before shrugging slightly.
“Could be anything. This forest is full of creatures, both magical and mundane. Might be a bat or could be something else. Don’t worry though, there’s not usually anything dangerous around this part of the forest. It’s too close to the edge and the creatures that can do the most harm prefer to remain deep within the forest.” It’s almost casual the way he slows to walk alongside you, giving you the safety of his presence but you notice it all the same.
Not that you comment on it, of course. But you appreciate it nonetheless.
Giving him a noncommittal sound, you continue until he takes a sudden turn off the path. The forest floor is dense with foliage and tree roots, causing you to trip a few times. Hoseok helps you along, reaching you to hold your arm to keep you upright when you trip over one too many roots and you get the sense he’s enjoying this.
Maybe it’s because he lets out a soft chuckle when you swear loudly, scowling down at the deeply embedded rock that you’d accidentally kicked. Despite the fact your best friend’s little brother is leading you deep into a scary, dark forest, you don’t feel any concern about him. What could be in the forest, sure, but not him.
He gives off a sense of security that surprises you. All those years ago, Hoseok had been the perfect example of an annoying little brother to Jisoo. Always irritating her and doing things with the sole purpose of being a pain, which in turn meant doing those things to you as well. But now he seemed dependable and you got the sense that you’d want him with you if anything bad happened.
“Okay, we’re almost there. Now, I need you to stay very calm and don’t make any large or sudden movements. You might scare her.” Staring at him in alarm, you suddenly realise that you’ve not even questioned what he’s wanting to show you. Not that he’d have told you, you’re positive of that, but his instructions make you feel a little uneasy.
Upon seeing your face in the light of his wand, he gives a small smile and rests his hand on your arm reassuringly.
“Don’t worry, I promise, you’re going to like this. You’ll understand what I mean.” Frowning at him, you watch as he starts forward once more and realise he’s heading into a little clearing. Sighing deeply, you realise that you don’t want to stand there on your own so you follow him slowly, almost hesitant to see whatever he’s bringing you to.
You swear, if it’s one of those obscenely large spiders that’s supposed to live in this forest then you’re going to jinx him with something he’ll still be suffering from in a year.
The clearing is small and almost circular, though the position of some trees makes it seem a little broken in places. Long grass that is almost bouncy cushions your feet and you wonder if flowers would grow in the daylight, the canopy of trees above broken and allowing more sky through than elsewhere.
During the day it would get a lot of sunlight, but at the moment you couldn’t help staring in awe at the moon as it glowed brightly, it’s full body visible against the black of the sky. A few stars twinkled serenely alongside it, looking peaceful and creating a beautiful image.
A pale, ghostly colour catches your attention from the corner of your eye and you find yourself pressing to Hoseok a little closer. His back is strong and solid against your hands as you tense in concern, peeking around him to try and catch what it was.
What you see causes you to gasp out loud, letting go of Hoseok’s robes abruptly as you take a wide step away from him to get a better view.
Long, sinewy legs move through the forest in an almost dainty manner, picking their way through the undergrowth with care and precision. There’s almost no sound as the creature moves towards the clearing, only the softest rustle of leaves that can’t be avoided. It’s fascinating how quietly it can move given its size and you wonder if it’s some magical ability that allows that.
Within moments, the shape coalesces into a clearer image as it passes through the edge of the trees on the other side of the clearing. A silver coat practically glows under the moonlight, giving the creature an ethereal feel that makes you feel that it’s not even real. That you’re just seeing an apparition instead of a real animal.
The horn on its head is long and spiralling, ending in a deadly point while the pale white mane and tail flow in elegant waves towards the ground. Golden hooves paw softly at the grass, glinting slightly.
A unicorn.
“Merlin’s beard…” You whisper, pressing a hand to your mouth before looking at Hoseok. “A unicorn...that’s a unicorn!”
They were rare creatures, even rarer now due to being hunted over the centuries by both muggles and wizards. Muggles thought them a myth now while you knew the rumour of the powerful properties that unicorn blood had. You hadn’t even known the Forbidden Forest had unicorns in them.
“It is. I haven’t named her, seems a little wrong to name her. They normally don’t really like men but I found her when she was injured two years ago. She was dying and I helped nurse her back to health. Unicorns have great memories and we’ve kind of become...friends? Or as much of a friend as you can be to one.” He finishes, smiling as he watches the unicorn snort almost in agreement.
Her eyes are a deep black in the moonlight but you note they look almost friendly and kind. Hoseok’s hand on your back pushes you forward slightly, causing you to start and look back at him with wide eyes.
“Move slowly...hold your hand out to her so she can see it and smell it. Be careful and like I said...no sudden moves. You’re a woman so she’s more likely to accept you anyway, but she’ll let you know if she’s not happy.” Gulping, you nod and take a deep breath. Letting it out slowly, you try to stop the trembling in your limbs.
Whether it’s from excitement at finally getting to see your favourite magical creature in the flesh or fear of being gored to death by that dangerous horn, you don’t know. But you follow Hoseok’s words, trusting him to be right.
Slowly, you walk forwards with your hand out, palm side up. Each step you take, you stare intently at the body of the unicorn to try and catch any movement that might be viewed as hostile. Given she had four legs, there was no way you could outrun her but you’d at least like to say you had a head start.
Despite your worry, she makes no threatening moves. If anything, she seems cautiously curious; her ears pricked forwards towards you and her eyes remaining focused solely on you. Not a muscle in her body moves, only the chilly wind blowing through her mane and tail.
Finally, you’re almost within touching distance of her. But instead of carrying on, you stop. Something inside you tells you that it’s a good idea to do that, to let her come to you and accept you. So you remain standing there with your palm held out to her, watching her closely.
Nostrils slightly darker than the rest of her body flare wide a few times, likely taking in as much air as she can to smell you. It isn’t enough though and she slowly extends her neck out, her refined head stretching out until you can feel the hotness of her breath. Not moving, you let her investigate until finally, she takes one careful step forward and presses the velvety softness of her muzzle into your hand.
Smiling, you let her increase the pressure before turning your hand and gently stroking her. There’s a moment of almost curiosity in her eyes, not that you can tell what a unicorn is feeling, before she lets out a huff of air and leans her head into your touch, obviously enjoying the feeling.
Your smile turns into a wide grin as you run your hand along her face slowly, letting her get used to the feel of you before you gently scratch at her chin. Almost instantly her ears flatten and you feel a pang of panic, but she just lifts her head and lets out a nicker of contentment, giving you a better position.
“She likes you.” You hear from beside you, and you turn to see Hoseok patting the unicorn’s neck.
Turning away from you momentarily, the mare lets out a soft whinny as she looks behind her into the forest. Frowning, you crane your head to try to see what she’s looking at. Soft footfalls being and you look at Hoseok in confusion, tilting your head at the sight of his grin.
Before you can ask him what’s going on, there’s a high pitched neigh and the mare turns her head back to you, butting at your hand gently. Glancing to her side, your jaw drops once more and you can’t help but squeal lightly.
A foal is standing next to her, it’s coat fluffy with baby fur and a beautiful golden that contrasts completely from its mother. There’s no horn on its head, only a tiny nub that will one day grow long and tall. Gangly legs look too long for its body and the short, fuzzy tail make you coo in delight as it flicks it from side to side eagerly, those big eyes staring at you as it almost dances in place.
Looking at its mum, you almost ask for the permission with a hand raised in the foal's direction and you could swear the unicorn almost nods. Slowly, you move towards the foal and stroke along its short neck, marvelling at how soft and fluffy it is. The foal snorts, its entire body wobbling from the movement and you giggle in delight, completely awed by the sight of them both.
“She had this foal only a month ago, so he’s still pretty small. But he’s a sweetheart and so friendly. As you probably know, he’ll keep that gold coat for two years before paling out to silver.” Hoseok says casually, still stroking the mare and smiling at her fondly.
For a few minutes, you’re too busy playing with the foal to pay attention to his words but they finally sink in.
“What do you mean, as you probably know?” Neither of you had discussed unicorns so far during your mealtime talks, so you didn’t know why he’d think that. Sure, you’d been taught about unicorns in school but that had been so long ago and it hadn’t even been a full class on them.
Your love of them had meant you’d learnt much more about them, absorbing all the information you could find in books when you were a teenager. The fact that you were finally standing here, stroking not only a unicorn but also her foal was something that you’d always wished you could do. Given how rare they were though, you’d never expected it to happen.
“Well, they’re your favourite magical creature, right? Or they were, anyway.” He frowns slightly, unsure if he’s got something wrong and you simply stare at him for a moment.
Had he remembered that from when you’d been at Hogwarts? Given your love of them, it was only natural that he’d known about them back then given how often you’d spent time at his house to have sleepovers with Jisoo. But you’d have thought he’d have forgotten all about that by now.
Jisoo didn’t even remember this as you’d both grown over the years, the obsession of teenagers mellowing out. Unicorns remained your favourite magical creature, but you didn’t hold that deep passion that you did back then. The fact that Hoseok had remembered stunned you into silence for a moment though, causing you to frown down at the foal.
“Yeah...yeah, they are. I...I mean...thank you. For remembering and showing me this, this is amazing. I’ll never forget this, Hoseok.” You’re not entirely sure how to thank him properly, because you don’t know of anyone else who could show you a unicorn like this.
Before you can say anything else or Hoseok can respond, you’re both distracted by the way the foal lets out a squeal and butts his head into you lightly before jumping away. Taken aback, you watch him for a moment for he does it again, his impossibly slim legs wobbling slightly as he trips on a rock.
“He wants you to play,” Hoseok says softly, smiling as he watches you both. Glancing to him, you raise a brow before grinning back at the baby unicorn. Tilting your head at him, you purse your lips before jumping forward and raising your hands in claw motions. Almost immediately, the foal leaps forward before darting back to you and you giggle, already planning your next move.
Yeah, okay, you might be thirty-three years old...but you were going to play with the baby unicorn.
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By The Witch's Grace
Route Unlocked: Wilbur
Chapter Four: One on One
A Sbi "choose your own story" fanfiction
Click here for story description
Warnings: cursing, description of anxiety, light angst, injuries, blood, talk of scars
4.7k words
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Y/n stepped down the stairs on the porch, they decided on going to see what Wilbur was doing since he was sitting next to the house. As they walked down the last step, they had turned to say hello to him but Wilbur had already hopped up with the guitar in hand and a big smile on his face when he saw them.
“Hey! Uh Y/n, good morning, I was going to ask if you could help teach me guitar?” He held the instrument up in his hands, gently like he was afraid to break it. “You seem like you’d be a good teacher.”
They looked him over and couldn’t help a smile and giggle at his gentleness.
“Yeah, I would love to teach you, here let’s go to the basement. I have my music books down there and we can get started teaching you some scales.” They offered to him, walking over to guide him to the lower doors on the home, and his eyes lit up as he followed them with excitement.
“I have to warn you though, it’s been a year or two since I’ve played anything, so I might not be as great of a teacher as you think.” They said while keeping the door held open for him to walk inside after them.
“You know more than me at least. I think that will make you a fine enough teacher” He spoke with an obvious smile in his voice, closing the door so he could follow after them and stopping only when Poppy ran up to him with a loud meow so he took a couple of moments to pet her. “I gotta go, sorry sweetie.”
Y/n jogged down the stairs, glancing back to see if Wilbur was behind but heard the soft meow of Poppy and figured he was giving her attention. They walked over to the bookcase filled with music books, all of them being hand-me-downs from the old woman from town that was practically their family now. She didn’t have any children of her own so Y/n simply took up the role for her so they inherited all of the music-related things they had. She was too busy to ever use it and happily gave it away when Y/n showed interest, but not before teaching them how to play.
They hummed while looking over the books, trying to find the one they knew had beginner information in it when Wilbur hurriedly joined them downstairs. They gave him a quick glance, seeing Poppy trailing right behind and tail held up high.
“Aww… she really likes you, Wilbur.”
He glanced back at the cat and smiled. “Yeah, well I really like…” He trailed off and slowly closed his mouth, clearly regretting the words he wanted to say. “Uhm, anyway, how do you... start learning this stuff?”
Y/n grabbed a book off the shelf and turned to face him, taking slow steps toward him as they flipped through pages and glanced over them. “Well, I watched my teacher play a few songs and had her teach me how to play the songs she did. That probably isn’t the best way to learn, but I think it worked pretty well.” They shut the book with a loud thump and extended it to him.
“If you want to learn chords and stuff first though, we can do that. Just whatever you think would be easiest for you to understand.”
He quickly set down the guitar to lean against a chair then took the book from them and opened it up, looking at the pages and trying to see if anything looked familiar or if it made any sense. Of course, it didn’t. It just looked like bunches of weird words and symbols that didn’t mean anything to him.
“I think… I’d like to hear you play.” He glanced up to meet their eyes then back to the book with a laugh. “‘Cause uh, this just looks like a mess of words.”
“Fair enough,” They started as they walked over to grab the guitar from beside him. “Honestly it took me a while to understand all that musical lingo too so I don’t blame you for wanting to start here.” They plopped down in the chair that was beside his and took the small wooden pick from between the strings on the neck of the instrument and strummed a couple of times before needing to tune a few strings.
Wilbur sat down, watching them for a moment before he focused on the book and read through a few pages while Y/n got the guitar in tune. They gave it a couple more strums before nodding their head in contentment with remembering how to get it in tune and situated it on their lap so they could play.
“Okay, I think I’m all ready. So the song I’m going to play is the first one I was taught. I can’t-” They laughed out of a bit of embarrassment, putting their fingers on the right strings. “I can’t remember who wrote it, but it was called Rounds. Now let’s see here...”
-
(cue Rounds by The Oh Hellos)
-
They strummed the chords, seeming a bit unconfident as they were afraid of messing up after not playing for so long. A good few times of repeating the same lines of music, they swayed slowly from side to side as they finally got into it.
They were so busy making sure they wouldn’t mess up that they didn’t notice Wilbur, who had long abandoned the book and was sitting as close to the side of the chair nearest to them to watch. He was leaned forward but slouched a bit since he was resting on his elbows though his eyes watched their hands move to make each new bit of sound. He didn’t miss the chance to sneak glances at their face while they were completely concentrated and not worried about him.
Y/n started to hum a soft tune along with the music, to which they didn’t even notice Wilbur softly joining in with a smile. Even as they hummed louder, loudening the strums as well, he remained undetected as he harmonized with them.
They changed the chords, dying it down, and stopped humming which indicated a change to the course of the song. They let out a breath before taking in a deep one and with the final two strums, they started.
“Am I still speaking?” They straightened and flicked their attention to Wilbur who sung the words along with them, he had a soft smile and a look of pure contentment. They couldn’t help but smile a little back at him, more in surprise than anything. They had to glance back to make sure their fingering was right but looked back at him to make sure it was really him singing with them.
“Yeah, I’m long in the wind.” He dipped his head down a bit, then looked away but continued to sing. “I’ll go on and on and on again, if my chest don't cave in.”
They cut the strum short with their palm and he looked back at them, confused. “You know this song!? There’s no way.”
“Oh really? Well, what about if I…” He averted his gaze, thinking for a moment before looking back to sing again. “Be the sun as my witness! Better prophets could pen. A thousand words for every chord I could ever begin.”
“No way…”
He giggled a little at their astonishment. “That’s my favorite verse.”
"Well, now you've gotta tell me where you learned that." Y/n eyed him with a smile before turning back to the guitar as they played over some of the later parts in the song, but still casting little glances as they waited for him to speak.
"One of the maids back at the castle actually, she was like a second mother after Kristen passed, she sang that song a lot. I helped clean clothes when I wasn't on duty or training." He explained, sitting up and leaning back in the chair but still watching Y/n. "I didn’t know there was music to it though, your humming kinda shot the memory back into me."
“So you know the whole thing?”
“I believe so, why?”
They stopped playing random chords and turned their body to him so he could fully see the guitar this time. “Let’s start again. Watch my hands okay?” With a smile at him, they looked back at the strings and started the song over again but with more confidence. They tapped their foot to the beat this playthrough of the song to keep themself in time.
They played through the song flawlessly, but Wilbur was unsatisfied as he didn’t have the chords down. So they played through it again and again. By the fourth time they ended the song, Wilbur was sitting crisscrossed in the chair, hands in his hair with a confused and completely lost look on his face from not retaining any of what they played enough to try for himself. Y/n laughed to themself and stood up, stretching their body from sitting in the same position for so long.
“Okay, I have an idea if you’re comfortable with it.” They looked down to him as he messed up his hair, smoothing it all down, and watched them curiously. “I can sit on the ground with you, so it’d be easier to help, and direct your hands. We can take it chord by chord, but it’s pretty repetitive so I think you’ll do good with it.”
“Absolutely because I am so lost. Like how do you memorize this stuff? I could never.” He said while moving off the chair to sit on the rug just under the chairs.
“You’ll get it, don't worry. I swear it’s not as hard as you might think once you play enough.” They sat down right in front of him and handed him the guitar. He took it slowly and held it awkwardly, obviously very unsure of how he should be holding it. Holding back on giggling, they scooted closer and guided his hands and the instrument to its proper placements then let him get comfortable with holding it.
“Ready?”
He glanced up at them then back down to his hands and the guitar, nodding a little bit. “Yeah… yeah, I think so.”
With that, they directed him on where to put his fingers for each chord and when he needed it, moved his hands themself or held their hand over his so he could get a feel on how to hold it. They were incredibly patient with him even with his ever so often apology for not being the fastest learner, he was trying hard to understand and remember how to play each chord they taught him. It got easier when they got into the system to teach him one chord then play the chords he knows to revise them all in a way. And after a while, he had all the needed notes down for the entire song.
“Wait, that's it? I did it?” Wilbur sat up straight and when they nodded, he gasped and smiled before moving closer so their knees were touching. “Okay, okay teach me how it goes, I’m ready!”
“Okay! Okay,” They stopped to giggle and thought for a second to make sure they told him the right notes.
The song slowly came together, it was slower than it should be played and he messed up quite a bit but none of it discouraged him. Wilbur never once got frustrated and would just silently correct himself and look for affirmation that he did well. And once he got comfortable with the song and played through it completely, Y/n sang softly to put it all together. Needless to say, he got distracted by them and when he tried to recover, fumbled with the strings and grew flustered by his obvious nervousness.
He let out a soft sigh, staring at the strings and very clearly thinking or seeming like he wanted to speak.
“Are you okay?” They leaned down to get into his view to which he looked at them and back at the guitar, smiling with a little laugh.
“Yeah, yeah I was just thinking… you know if you were a musical term, I think melody would fit you best.”
“You think?” He nodded confidently. “Well explain then, why would I be the melody?”
“Well truthfully, you just remind me of music. Like the parts of it that can be addicting but also more soothing than anything else, even the part of it that moves you to your core.” He met their eyes, holding the contact as he tipped his head to the side. “Yeah… just the embodiment of music. But if you were to fit somewhere specifically it would be the melody.”
They opened their mouth to ask him another question so he could talk about this more, but the sound of the front door opening and closing caught both of their attention with Phil’s voice following after.
“Y/n? Wilbur?”
“Down here!” Y/n called, leaning back to look over at the stairs. Phil made his way down the stairs and stalled as he looked over the scene of the two but just smiled.
“Hey, I’m going to start cooking. You two take a break and come help me, alright?” He told them before heading back up the stairs. Poppy, who had been fast asleep in one of the plush chairs, had perked up when hearing Phil and jumped off and ran past Y/n and Wilbur to follow him upstairs. They both put away the couple of things they got out before walking upstairs and to the kitchen.
“But seriously Wilbur, you’re doing really well. You kept going strong no matter how many times you messed up. I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you Y/n, maybe I’ll get better than you.” He teased, shoving them lightly with his shoulder and earning a shove right back before they walked ahead of him to see Phil. He was already busy dicing an onion with some meat already cooking.
Phil looked back when the two approached him but quickly turned back to watch his hands. “What were you two up to? It looked like you were teaching Wilbur guitar.”
“They were and I have to say,” Wilbur leaned on the counter beside Phil. “I think I’m doing pretty well. In all honesty, I think I might be a melomaniac.” He looked over at Y/n and looked them up and down with a smile, but turned back to Phil and talked about whenever he found interesting from learning to play the guitar as if what he did never happened.
-
“Come on, just look through it with me please!!” Wilbur begged Y/n, walking around in front of them to stop them from walking out the door as he held a thick book in hand.
The whole morning he had been trying to get Y/n to tell him what their favorite song was and as soon as he got the dreaded ‘I don’t know’ he raced to find the biggest music book he could so they could find one to show him. They were supposed to go practice magic with Phil as soon as they were done eating and didn’t want to leave him waiting any longer than they had to.
“I’m sorry, I can’t right now. Look I will once I’m done I promise!” They pushed his arm gently to get him to move, but all they got was a pout out of him. They rolled their eyes and sighed, taking a step back. “Okay um, I remember a song in one of those books. It was one of my favorites to play. Uh, one of the lines was… ‘days fade into a watercolor blur’ but I can't remember the name right now, can I go?”
“Yes! Absolutely, thank you my melody, I hope your magic lessons go well!” He patted their back before he raced off past them and assumably down to the basement, leaving them very caught off guard.
“Melody..?” They stood there thinking for a moment, but shook it off and headed out of the door to find Phil. He said he’d be sitting with the chickens that morning so obviously, that was their first place to look. Just as expected, he was sitting in the dirt with a rooster in his lap and a few of the rooster’s hens hanging around. Phil glanced up and when noticing Y/n he smiled and waved them over.
“Hey! Sorry, I meant to be here sooner but Wilbur was insistent that I show him my favorite song from my music books.” They explained, walking slower when they neared Phil as to not disturb the chickens and sat down in front of him.
He chuckled and watched the rooster as he pets him. “That’s quite alright mate. He’s really taken a liking to you, I’m sure you’ve already been able to tell though.” He just smiled fondly, taking in a deep breath. “He never has been one for keeping his feelings hidden away, just like with Sally, the poor boy wears his heart on his sleeve. I bet he doesn’t even realize, he probably thinks he’s being so sly.”
Y/n laughed a little bit at his assessment. Phil was spot on, but after raising someone it wouldn’t be too hard to know all about them. They reached out when a hen came out to them and stroked the side of her face with their finger. “He’s sweet though, I didn’t expect him to be so eager to take up all my time.”
“Well…” They looked up at Phil when he trailed off then followed his eyes when he looked over to the house. They then noticed Technoblade sitting beside the house, obviously meditating. “In case you get tired of Will, you can always go give Techno some company. I think he’d like your presence.” Turning back to Phil, he watched them with a hopeful expression but dropped it when they just stared at him. He slowly got up, giving the rooster time to hop off his lap.
“You don’t have to for my sake, I just think it would do him good to have a partner- er uh-” He stopped, fumbling over words a little bit. “I mean- like a friend. A companion. But choose who you wish! I’m not picking sides here.” A blatant lie. They couldn’t help but laugh at him.
Y/n stood up, assuming Phil wanted to move somewhere else. “Of course, Of course. I think it would be hard to get tired of him though.” They watched the hen they were giving attention peck around on the ground near their feet. “He’s giving me a new found passion for music because of his excitement towards it, it’s refreshing.”
He chuckled softly, walking past them and patting their shoulder. They turned to follow him and stayed quiet while they walked slightly behind him but at his side. He stopped at the tree line and looked in, seeming a bit lost in thought, and turned to them after a moment.
“Y/n, would you mind telling me about the eye?”
They went quiet, not sure how to respond as the light heartedness of the situation was stripped from them at the mention. Instead, they looked down at the necklace which forever hung around their neck. At this point, it felt more like something chaining them down than a tool to help them be a better mage like they hoped it would be. “Where do I even start?” They tried to laugh off the lump rising in their throat but looking up and meeting Phil’s worried expression just made tears prick their eyes. He took a step closer to them, but they took a few back in response. “No, no I’m fine just… I’m okay.” They kept their eyes on the ground, sniffling as they felt a tear run down their cheek.
“Mate, we don’t have to talk about it if it’s hard to.” Phil said softly, keeping his distance from them.
“It just… made me realize how afraid it made me. It's…” They looked up suddenly, still having tears in their eyes. “Phil, it’s taken over me. It’s- it’s possessed me! I was so scared when it happened. I mean it has only happened twice but what happens when it does again!? I don’t- I-I don’t know…” Their breaths got caught in their throat and they took short shuddering gasps trying their hardest to contain it and not break down. Not here, not in front of someone they just started to know and trust. They felt their legs start to get weak and their vision was nothing but a blur from the tears.
Phil grabbed ahold of their arms and they met his eyes, now noticing how hard they were breathing. He pulled them in and hugged them tightly to which they held onto him, using him as a solid form to help them ground themself again. They mumbled small things about how scary it was to wake up halfway down their forest path to town and how they could feel the evilness of the eye right before it took over. He stayed quiet and listened to them, rubbing their back slowly once they had calmed down a little.
They took a deep breath and rested their forehead against his shoulder. Finally releasing a little bit of the pent-up fear and anxiety that was building up around the eye had lifted the static that festered in their chest. “Phil…” Y/n said quietly as they slowly pulled away from him though they kept their eyes averted away. “Is there anything I can do to get rid of this?”
“I…” He started but trailed off. It was clear he was clueless, still, he cleared his throat and reached over to rub their arm comfortingly. “I’ll figure something out. I promise.” They looked back at him and he smiled at them which finally earned a small smile in return. “Do you still want to learn some magic? I know some music-related spells.” When their eyes lit up a bit, he chuckled and took a seat on the ground, ushering them to join him.
Y/n spent most of the day outside with Phil. He taught them little spells and tricks to incorporate magic into their music, he sang a few songs as a way to show them and it turned out he had a rather nice voice. A few times when they got caught up in emotions, he offered fatherly advice and joked with them to lighten the mood. He was quickly growing to be like the father they never had… or at least remembered having. It was until he was in the middle of meditating with them that Tommy came up to them, he was dirty and holding onto his forearm with a bit of blood that was seeping through his fingers. Y/n saw him first as they opened an eye when hearing footsteps approaching them. He kept his eyes on the ground, clearly trying to make it seem like he didn’t have tears in his eyes.
They jumped up and ran over to him, startling Phil who finally noticed his son. “Oh, Tommy what happened!?” They reached over to look at his arm, he pulled away at first and they looked at him. He met their eyes and sniffled again, finally letting his arm go to show them a deep cut that was actively bleeding. “Oh my gosh, are you okay? You’re not hurt anywhere else are you?” They asked him while taking off the cloth they were using as a belt and wrapped it around his arm to help maintain the bleeding and checked him over right after. Phil was beside them now, looking Tommy over while he stared at the ground.
“I didn’t think the sheep could actually be that scary, I-” He hiccuped a little, squeezing his eyes shut to stop himself from crying more but they fell anyway. It seemed that getting hurt overwhelmed him. Phil brushed some of his hair back and softly consoled him to calm him down. It took a moment, but he started talking again. “I was messing with them and tried getting on one’s back, it bucked me off and that upset a few of them and they ran at me. I was running away and tried jumping over the fence and that… obviously didn’t go well for me.”
“Aw… yeah it’s barbed wire. Let’s get you inside, I can help you clean this-”
“It’ll take too long, it’ll get infected if we let it be.” Phil butted in and moved Y/n’s hands off of Tommy’s arm. He undid the cloth that was thoroughly bloody now and gave it back to Y/n. He gently put his hand over the cut and kept it there as it glowed a soft white, within no time he took it away and the wound had closed up enough that it wasn’t open. “You’ll still need to clean it but-”
“Oooh! It’s been forever since you’ve done that, that was so cool!” Tommy said excitedly, his eyes and nose were still a little red from crying, but he was smiling and looking at Phil with bright eyes like he wasn’t upset just a second ago. “Can you do that again?”
“Wha- no! You’d have to get hurt again for me to do that- and do not go get trampled by the sheep or some shit.” He sighed, lightly laughing. “You little shit- are you alright though? You’re not hurt anywhere else right?”
Tommy shook his head and looked down at his arm, wiping away some of the half-dried blood that only smeared more from the blood on his hand. “I probably have some bruises, but now I just smell like shit.” Phil laughed and went around him, patting his back and pushing him forward to get him to start walking back to the house to which Y/n followed right beside.
Techno seemed to know something was up as he put down the wooden staff he was training with and hurried over to the three of them. “Did something happen?” He immediately noticed the blood on Tommy and grabbed his shoulder to stop him and looked him over.
“He’s fine, mate, don’t worry. I healed him up, he’s okay.” Phil said in a hurry to cure Techno’s worry.
“Haha yeah bitch, now I’ll have a badass scar like you.” Tommy said with a smug look, but Techno just rolled his eyes and gave him a little shove.
“It’s only badass if you have a cool story behind it.” He corrected and held his head up to look down at his brother. “What’s your super cool story behind it?”
Tommy puffed his chest out and stood tall to try and seem as big as Technoblade. “Yeah, well I had to fight off all the sheep in the pastu-”
“Okay! Nope, inside with you!” Y/n grabbed his arm and pulled him away and toward the steps of the porch. “You two can continue your little… whatever this is inside, you need to get cleaned up.”
He groaned and made a face at them. “Yeah okay, MOM.” He snickered and rushed inside with Phil following after with a smile. They followed the two, watching Techno jog over to grab the staff he left before he started walking back to the house.
Y/n grabbed herbs and soap once they got into the house and helped Tommy clean himself up before they sent him off to bathe. They washed the blood off of their belt the best they could before they went back downstairs to put away their things by themself before hearing a knock on the wall. Turning around, there was Wilbur beside the stairs watching them.
“Hey there.” He started with a bit of a smile and walked over to them to watch where they were putting everything. “Um, once you’re done, want to come see what I’ve learned today?” He watched them expectantly and they couldn’t help a smile. They reached into a barrel and pulled out two apples, throwing one to him without warning though he still caught it.
“Yeah, let’s go. Bet you’re still not as good as me.” They walked past him and nudged him with their shoulder playfully. He chuckled and followed behind with a poke to their arm.
“Mmm yeah we’ll see about that, won’t we”
___________________________________________
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wounded soul | part one.
༄ؘ marleyan nurse! reader , season 4 eren
༄ؘ fluff
part two : https://connieslover.tumblr.com/post/646834471134429184/wounded-soul-part-two
✧˖*°࿐ you work as a nurse in a hospital and you’re assigned to take care of an oddly mysterious and suspicious man.
the sound of your alarm clock ringing violently woke you up from your deep and peaceful slumber. groaning, you reached your arm out and hit your alarm clock, making it shut up. your eyelids remained closed as you pulled the warm blanket closer to your body. you wanted to lay in your bed forever.
your eyes finally fluttered open. you stretched your arms and lifted your body up. yawning, you grabbed your alarm clock to check the time. with wide eyes you jumped out of your bed.
you were late, for the third time of the week.
well, who couldn’t blame you for sleeping in? marley had just won the mid-east war after four long years. it was a night for you, your family and friends to rejoice in victory.
you ran into the hospital, ignoring the stares of the staffs and patients as you eagerly searched for your co-worker.
“oi y/n! there you are,” you heard your co-worker call out, “late again huh?”
the figure who eyed you watched as your nestled messy hair moved along with the wind as you ran. he looked at your nursing uniform that was so obviously threw on last minute as a few of the buttons were still unbuttoned.
‘people here really don’t take their jobs seriously’
“tch, as if you weren’t partying last night too,” you snickered. you sent him a glare before taking a check board from his hands. your eyes surveyed the soldiers who were standing in a line.
“whatever. anyways, these are soldiers who are facing psychological problems due to the war. i already checked every patient’s details. you’re assigned to kruger,” he pointed to the long brown haired male with a bandaged eye who had a crutch under his arm which supported his body as he was missing half a left leg.
“i don’t know about you but he looks homeless to me,” he leaned in to whisper to you.
you rolled your eyes before looking through the medical details of kruger on your board.
“poor thing. he must’ve really suffered during the war,” you sighed, feeling empathetic for him. you walked over to the male with a soft smile on your face,
“hello kruger, i’m y/n. from today onwards, i’ll be your nurse. if you need anything, feel free to call me,”
the male only stared at you in silence. asides from his towering height, his dull emerald eyes seemed to bore into your soul, intimidating you.
“w-well i’ll bring you into your room,” you cleared your throat, breaking the eye contact. you lead the patient into the hospital and into a monotonous room where there was only a window, curtains and a hospital bed.
you placed his arm around your shoulders and gently guided him into the bed, helping him sit down.
“i’ll start checking on your vitals,” you announced. after a temperature measure, reading his pulse and checking his blood pressure, you could deem that he was fine.
“okay, it seem’s that you’re all good, kruger,” you beamed, placing your check board on the desk beside his bed. kruger solemnly nodded before leaning his head against the board of the bed, staring at the ceiling.
intrigued about the war, you hesitated to ask kruger your question. he was a psychological patient and you didn’t want to make matters worse for the poor soul. but curiosity ate you up.
“kruger, do you mind if i ask you a question about the war...?” you asked with great caution. kruger’s facial features remained stoic as he stared at you.
“i understand if you don’t want to talk about it though! i’m sorry, i shouldn’t have asked,” you spluttered, waving your hand around frantically.
“the war was hell. i never imagined that humanity’s greatest enemy is humanity itself. titan’s were flying everywhere. it was a repulsive sight.” that was the first time you had heard his voice. it was deep and raspy, with a hint of torment hiding somewhere. his voice sounded like a violin with broken and old strings.
your facial expression contorted into pity, mixed with slight fear.
“you must’ve went through a lot kruger. i sincerely thank you for fighting for marley,” all of a sudden, you had a jolt of enthusiasm coursing through your body, “i will do my best to take care of you!”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
“so....how was kruger?” your co-worker sneaked up behind you, giving you a startle.
“oh my god, don’t scare me like that!” you scolded, hitting him lightly on his shoulders.
he only chuckled before repeating his question, “so are you going to tell me how kruger was or ?”
“he seems very...closed off. he doesn’t answer a lot of my questions. i don’t know what else i can say about that. the war must’ve traumatised him really badly,” you sighed, crossing your arms on your chest.
“and he was only fifteen when he enlisted,” added your co-worker. he checked his wrist watch and patted your shoulder, “i gotta go now, see you later y/n.” you nodded and bid him goodbye.
“well, i guess i should be looking for kruger,” you mumbled.
after jogging around the corridors of the hospital, inquiring about the whereabouts of kruger to your other co-workers, you finally spotted him. he was sitting outside on a bench, accompanied by a familiar light brown haired boy. your eyes gleamed in joy.
“falco?”
falco’s eyes widened once he caught sight of you, tears gathered in his hazel eyes. he jumped out of his spot and wrapped his hands around your waist, nuzzling his head against your chest. you laughed before ruffling his short hair.
“i haven’t seen you in so long falco. i worried every single day, praying for you and the rest to come back to marley safely. well, i knew that you warrior candidates would make it back safely but still... im thankful that you made it back,” you smiled, breaking off the hug to wipe away the tears on his face with your thumbs. you felt an immense amount of relief and joy when you stared at falco.
although he wasn’t your blood relative, you treated him and the other warrior candidates as your younger siblings and they treated you like you were their older sister.
“i told you we’d make it back alive,” he chirped, lips forming into a smile.
“you made marley proud,” you ruffled his hair once again. your eyes then darted to kruger who had been watching the two of you the whole time. “so, i see that you’ve made a friend,”
“mr.kruger here has been giving my encouraging words- oh, speaking of words i have to deliver a letter he wrote. i’ll see you soon y/n!” with a letter in his hand and the other waving at you, falco was off running to the post. a small smile made it’s way to your face. you sat down on the bench, beside kruger.
“you seem to get along well with falco. how did you two meet?” you asked.
“he helped me the other day. it’s good that we get along well,” he simply responded, looking into the direction falco ran.
“his uncle was one of the ringleaders of the eldian restoration movement. the restorationists and all their families were sent to paradis. falco and his brother aspired to become warriors to protect their family. and now that his brother will be inheriting the beast titan, their family will be safe,” you started, “i’m so proud of falco for becoming a warrior candidate. im hoping that he’ll inherit a titan too,”
“why are you telling me this?” kruger could only question.
"don’t ask him to send letters for you, they might get suspicious. so instead, i’ll deliver your letters from now on,” you said. kruger only nodded to your words.
an awkward silence engulfed the two of you.
remembering something, you excitedly jumped on your feet, “kruger, let me bring you somewhere,”
the male rose a brow, “where?”
“you’ll see,” you grinned, helping him stand up. the walk to your secret place was silent well, asides from your occasional humming.
“we’re here!”
the two of you arrived at a small hill. there was a garden of astonishing flowers that were spread on the green grass. furthermore, from where the two of you were standing, you could see the blue sky, accompanied by the ocean. the view here was breathtaking. you spotted your blanket you hung from a tree and grabbed it, placing it on the grass.
“come sit,” and kruger did as he was told. kruger sat in the space next to you. you brought your knees to your chest as you admired the scenery. there was a gentle breeze in the air. you could hear the chatters of the citizens, along with the sound of the cars on the roads and some birds chirping.
surprisingly, it was kruger who broke the silence.
“after the festival, i’m going to go back home,”
“oh, i see. your family must be worried about you,”
“so, how are your family like back home?”
you swore you saw kruger’s eye twitch for a second. pain sprawled on his face and disappeared quickly like lightning.
“my parents are dead,” he stated emotionlessly. your mouth flew open.
“i’m so sorry, i shouldn’t have asked,” you apologised, cursing to yourself in your head.
“it’s alright... i have a half-sister who always followed me around and a childhood friend who does the same. i guess they are my family now...” you gazed upon kruger. although his emerald eyes had a dullness to them, you couldn’t ignore the sadness that often glinted.
“that’s nice. i haven’t seen my own family in a while...but it’s okay since i have falco... and the rest,” you slowly laid down on your blanket, crossing your arms behind your head which acted as a cushion. “we’re both people with broken families huh?”
“yeah...”
you were too occupied at staring at the sky to notice kruger who was staring at your resting state.
he was eager to hear your thoughts.
“say...what do you think about the devils of paradis?”
you were silent for a couple of seconds before you spoke, “well, everyone says that only devils live on that island. devils who turned our world into hell and selfishly made their own utopia. ‘we eldians have devoted our lives as we atone for the unspeakable history we brought to marley. because we are virtuous eldians,’. virtuous eldian’s my ass.”
“no one deserves the fate of turning into a mindless titan. after all, at the end of the day, no matter who we are, we’re all just humans right? i bet there are kind people on paradis too. not just devils. we can’t just judge a race we don’t have a lot of knowledge about. actually, we shouldn’t even judge a person based on their race. so i’d like to believe that the people on paradis aren’t devils,” you finished speaking.
kruger could pick up the sincerity in your voice as you spoke. he was moved and speechless. he had never met someone who had the same ideology as you; that there was a chance that people on paradis weren’t devils. and that everyone was one and the same.
you had earned his respect.
'she’ll get along well with armin,’
“what about you?”
flustered by your question, kruger cleared his throat, “i don’t think they are devils too,”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
days passed with you continuously doing the regular routine of checking kruger’s vitals, sending his letters, you sharing your own stories and bringing falco to talk to him.
you didn’t know how but visiting kruger’s hospital room became something you looked forward to doing everyday. it was something about his mysterious aura that made you interested in him.
and you visiting him was something the man himself enjoyed. surprisingly. your radiant and cheerful energy could lighten up any dim lit room so easily. you were the only good thing here in marley.
the two of you were walking around the outdoors of the hospital as ‘physical activity’ was something kruger lacked.
“and then after the party, my friend reiner started throwing up everywhere so badly he couldn’t get out of his bed the next day. and guess what? when he woke up, the first thing he did was vomit. on me!” you rambled about your story of reiner throwing up, your hands moving animatedly as you talked.
something about you that kruger brought himself to like was the fact that you were so talkative and extroverted. and the way you spoke with your hands. it was cute. at this point, kruger wasn’t even paying to the words you said, and instead he was just staring at you. with an unexplainable feeling and admiration.
whilst you were busily telling your story, you felt a person bumping into you harshly, causing you to lose balance and toppling yourself onto the floor. you felt a sharp pain on your tailbone and you mumbled an ouch before opening your eyes.
falco bent down in front of you, a sheepish look on his face. your cross face immediately disappeared.
“sorry y/n, i guess i was too excited,” he apologised, picking up the sheets of paper that were once in your hands and now on the floor.
“it’s alright falco,” you pulled yourself from the ground and dusted your uniform before redeeming the files from falco. kruger peered at the sheets of papers in your arms, interested.
“what are those?” he asked.
“those are y/n’s secret works,” whispered falco to the taller man. you shot falco a ‘why did you say that look?’ before hiding the files behind your back.
kruger raised a brow at you, “secret experiments?”
your mind came into a blur as you tried to give an excuse.
“secret works? w-who said that? falco was just joking. after all im just a nurse...i’m way too busy for secrets. falco, tell kruger you were joking,” you gave a fake chuckle and nudged the boy’s side. falco simply blinked before understanding what you were doing.
“oh yeah i was just joking kruger. y/n would never experiment on anything. she’s too clumsy!” the both of you shared an obviously fake laughter.
kruger was not fazed. his eyes just stared at you. intimidated by his looks you gave a sigh and signalled him to follow you. falco gave kruger an excited look, before trailing behind you.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
you had lead the two into the entrance of a locked experimental lab which was in the most deserted floor and area of the hospital. grabbing the keys out of your pocket, you unlocked the door knob, then pushing the doors open.
“welcome to my little lab,”
the lab was dimly lit and slightly dusty. there was a slight aroma of stinging chemicals that filled the air. on the tables laid test tubes, conical flasks, microscopes- basically any chemical laboratory equipments that has ever existed. kruger’s eyes moved to the shelves that had bottles of unknown substances.
“so, do you mind telling me what your secret works is all about?” questioned kruger.
you placed the sheets of papers in your hand on one of the nearby tables and sprawled it out. kruger took it as a sign to move closer to where you were. on each sheet of paper there were complex formulas, messy handwriting and sketches of titans. kruger picked one of the sheets and read the bolded handwriting out loud,
“fast regen number four,”
“my mother was a scientist and my father was a doctor. with the existence of titans, naturally, they were both intrigued. and as i grew up, i became fascinated in titans too. i wanted to become a scientist so that i could discover more about titans but...that sort of job doesn’t exist here in marley. and so, i just decided to become a nurse,” you explained your upbringing and interest in titans.
“y/n couldn’t give up on her fascination with titans though. and so~ she started playing around with zeke’s spinal fluid and started creating weird serums and stuff,” chimed in falco. you puffed your cheeks with air in embarrassment.
“i wasn’t playing around falco, i was experimenting!”
"are the serums in that shelf?” kruger asked, pointing to the dusty shelf.
“yup,” you grabbed one of the serum bottles from the shelves, “i’m currently developing a tonic that speeds up the regeneration for shifter titans. it could be handy for when they’re in war,”
“what else have you been thinking of developing?”
“you’re one curious fella aren’t you?” you chuckled.
“so far only the faster regeneration tonic and stimulants that can make a titan’s power stronger for a period of time,” you answered showing kruger a sheet of paper that had a messily written recipe.
“hange would go crazy if she saw this,” kruger muttered, just loud enough so that you could hear.
“hange?”
“she’s an old friend of mine,”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
today was a busy day in the hospital. it was much more busier than usual. although your body was aching and that you were very desperate to go back home to sleep in your comfortable bed, you still had to check up on kruger.
you entered his hospital room, flabbergasted that he wasn’t sitting on his bed, waiting for you like usual.
slightly panicked, you ran to your co-worker, asking him if he knew about the whereabouts of kruger.
“kruger? i saw him leave the hospital a while ago....”
you immediately ran outside the hospital, eyes surveying the perimeter. you didn’t see the familiar long browned hair male.
there was only one place left you could think of,
your secret place.
you practically panted when you arrived. it was as if you had just ran a 1500m marathon. you didn’t know why you were so eager to look for him. wiping the sweat off your forehead, you looked up and there he was. you felt like every fibre of your body wasn’t aching anymore when you saw his figure.
relieved that you found him, you quietly sat down beside him.
“you gave me a scare. i thought you had ran away,” you chuckled, then laying down onto the blanket. you closed your eyes, your chest heaving up and down.
“freedom.” was all he said. you remained quiet, allowing him to continue.
“the only thing i want is freedom. for me, and the people in my hometown. i’ll do anything it takes...to acquire that freedom for them,” kruger’s emerald eyes gazed upon the horizon. the hues of orange and red from the sunset reflected in his eyes.
“what do you think is freedom, y/n?”
“freedom feels unreachable but the closest thing to freedom for me is being with you. i don’t know how to explain it but being with you feels like this. a cool breeze, relaxing with no worries and-” a warmth infusing on your cheeks made you stop talking. you realised that if you were to go on, you might spill something that you wanted to keep for yourself.
“what were you saying?”
the sound of the branches and honking of cars were the only things he heard. he turned his head, facial expressions softening when he saw your sleeping figure. your eyes were closed, displaying your lashes that rested on your cheeks nicely. your lips were slightly parted as you breathed. the pink on your cheeks were faint but still visible. you looked composed and peaceful.
the male scooted closer to you and placed your head on his lap.
kruger didn’t know what brought him to do it.
with slight hesitance, he grazed his fingers on your messy hair. he caressed your hair with such fondness and gentleness that it reminded him of when his mother used to caress him as a child.
you were a kind soul. anyone could tell. kruger found himself adoring at the way you spoke with sincerity whenever you talked about a subject you were interested in, with your eyes lighting up like the stars in the sky. how you took great care for the one’s who were injured, how you had such strong beliefs, how you didn’t care about the whole history of eldian’s and especially, how he felt like when he was with you.
he hasn’t felt this way with anyone before.
though he inherited visions of the future from his titan powers, he didn’t inherit any emotions from them. they were all new. he wondered if this is what he was supposed to feel.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・
kruger stared out of his window, looking at the sky as the clouds moved. he only had a few days left before the festival. a few days left before he would be going back to his hometown. in his period of time in marley, he never expected that he would get personally attached to a person.
a person who he had to often remind himself was one of his enemies.
his thoughts were cut off when he heard your voice,
“good morning kruger! you can’t guess what happened to-”
you were so ecstatic to see the male that you had tripped on your own feet, making you fall onto the ground with a thump. with a bruising forehead, you heaved your body upwards, wincing at the pain.
you felt yourself getting embarrassed until you heard a chuckle escape kruger’s lips. his lips were turned upwards and the corner of his eye’s had crinkled slightly.
you saw his soul in his smile.
and it was a soul that was wounded but pure and beautiful.
this was the first time that you had heard him laugh and smile. and it was a delight.
you didn’t know if your heart was racing because you felt embarrassed, or how over the moon you were over the fact that you had finally made him smile or over how good-looking he was.
“how dare you laugh at me,” you shot him a glare.
kruger stood from the bed, hopping over to where you were. he reached out his hand, offering to help you up. your hand reached to hold his and you pulled yourself up from the ground. his hands were large and coarse. you could see a mark on his hand that was ever so faint. holding his hands made your heart stir.
“i haven’t laughed in a while,” kruger confessed, his lips slowly returning back to it’s neutral frown.
“well, i’m happy that i made you smile,”
you then realised that you were still holding onto his hand. you felt your ears warm and you quickly let go of his hand. you shifted your eyes to the walls of the room, glancing everywhere but at him.
“s-sorry. you’ll be leaving tomorrow right?” you stammered, wanting to change the conversation.
kruger didn’t respond to your question and instead said, “let’s go for a walk.”
the two of you were walking next to each other, admiring the silence between the two of you.
“you’re the first person i have ever brought to my secret place,” you hummed. your feet stopped. you then turned to face kruger,
“i never knew that i could ever befriend a patient. thank you, kruger.”
your eyes sparkled when you smiled at him. it felt as if a ray of sunshine was all over your face. you radiated such brightness and warmth that it took everything in him to not break down.
kruger felt like the world was a better place when you smiled. he had the urge to protect the smile that you had shown him.
but he knew that your smile wouldn’t last.
“actually, my name is eren,”
you blinked twice.
“eren?” you repeated, letting his real name roll off your tongue. the male nodded.
“eren...is a nice name,”
“i hope to see you again in the future, y/n,” and with that, the two of you remained silent.
#eren x reader#eren yeager#eren jäger#aot#snk#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#eren x y/n#season 4 aot#aot season 4#eren fluff#nurse
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young god | epilogue

chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | epilogue
word count: 4.4k
description: it’s been five years since the Miroh Heights murder cases came to a close — and five long, bittersweet years since you’d caught a glimpse of Han Jisung. Things in Miroh Heights have changed drastically since then — but when Felix sets you up on another blind date in an attempt to help you move on from the past, you realise that, once again, you’ve signed up for much more than you bargained for.
masterlist
recommended listening: stray kids - “sunshine”

epilogue.
“See ya, Miss l/n!”
You turned to wave back at the little girl who had called your name, her round eyes visibly bright from the waiting room of your clinic. Seven years old, front teeth just beginning to come in. One of her hands clutched a half-unwrapped lollipop as her mother held onto the other.
The first time you had seen them, the child had been unwilling to speak — bullied relentlessly at school, her mother had informed you through a veil of desperate tears — but now, her laughter filled the warm air, traumas that had once been etched into a too-young face already beginning to heal and fade.
Evening sunshine warmed your cheeks the moment you stepped out of the building’s doors, a light breeze rustling the papers in your hand as you quickly tucked them into your bag. “Five years of graduate school hasn’t made you more organised,” Felix often teased you, and you would smack his shoulder in retaliation.
Five years hadn’t changed your friendship in the slightest, either—and you had to admit you were beyond grateful for that.
As always, the city around you was humming with life: evening rush hour, with people darting here and there, frantically flagging down taxis and catching their buses. Usually, on days like these, you should have been hopping into the first cab home and collapsing like a corpse as soon as you reached your apartment. But today, you remembered with a sigh, was not going to be one of those days.
“Hey, Doctor l/n!”
You whipped your head towards the voice, a smile spreading across your tired features as you saw who it belonged to. In a slightly jaded Mini Cooper—second hand, of course, but worked just like new — Yang Jeongin waved at you from the driver’s seat.
“I’m not a doctor, ‘innie,” you reminded him playfully as he unlocked the passenger door and let you climb in.
“Not a doctor yet,” he corrected you, grinning. “Besides, ‘child therapist’ doesn’t have as much of a ring to it.”
You rolled your eyes, laughing, and waved at another one of your patients as Jeongin started the engine. “You really didn’t have to offer to drive me, you know — the streets are a nightmare during this hour.”
“It’s not that far,” Jeongin protested, “Plus, I barely get to see you now, you’re so busy.” You didn’t have the heart to argue. The kid loved being behind the wheel so much, he made it seem like you were doing him a favour.
You watched Jeongin turn onto the main road, squeezing the car in between a van and a motorcyclist. He really had grown up over the last few years — his hair was darker now, remarkably sharp cheekbones overtaking his once-rounded cherub cheeks — but in some ways, nothing had changed at all. He still had that natural knack of brightening whatever room he stepped in — the Yang Jeongin effect, Hyunjin called it. And his heart was still too big for his own good: you remembered how he had adamantly refused to take the money Jisung kept offering him after the case had finally closed, and when Hyunjin had asked him why, Jeongin had simply replied, “After everything that’s happened, it doesn’t feel like he’s the one who owes me.”
On the other hand, Jeongin had been more than happy to take Prosecutor Kang’s compensation money instead, and had finally visited a car dealership with you and Hyunjin.
The moment he had seen the Mini-Cooper — a beat-up thing from the 90s that you were amazed was still running — the younger boy’s eyes had lit up. “It’s just...it looks like the one our family used to have, before...the incident,” he had explained sheepishly, making you and Hyunjin exchange a look. And so, after a fiery back-and-forth between you and the salesman—not to mention a few sleepless nights at the mechanic’s — the rest was history.
The light turned green, and you spotted a photograph wobbling on the dashboard — a laughing child you recognised immediately as Jeongin. Behind him, a woman with a familiar wide smile had her arms around a man with eyes resembling a fox’s, with none of the slyness. “How’s your dad these days?”
“Mostly stays at home taking care of my mum, but he swears he wouldn’t have it any other way.” Jeongin turned his head to you excitedly, as if a thought just hit him. “She got out of bed a couple days ago, you know? The first time ever since my dad left.”
Your mouth fell open in a surprised smile, and Jeongin continued, “He’s real excited he got to teach me how to drive, too. I think he feels like he missed out on a lot of things, like...walking me home from school. Teaching me how to ride a bike. Graduation.” He shrugged. His words might have sounded sad at first, but you could see the way the lines of Jeongin’s face were more relaxed now, at peace.
“Mind if I make a quick stop?” Jeongin asked abruptly, and you checked your watch before shaking your head lightly.
“I’m still about twenty minutes early. We’ve got plenty of time.”
He turned onto a familiar street, and you rolled down the window as Glow Cafe slowly came into view. It was just as busy as it had ever been — even the cars were stalling by the curb — but Hwang Hyunjin spotted you almost immediately, waving through the glass window. Quickly hopping out, Jeongin popped the trunk open, and you watched him haul two crates of coffee beans into the bustling cafe. The once-famed “delivery boy” of Miroh Heights only really did deliveries for Glow Cafe now, after Hyunjin had offered Jeongin a position as a barista until he graduated—and although he wasn’t the best with his hands (or his memory, for that matter), Hyunjin didn’t mind in the slightest.
“Him being here is more than enough for business. You should see the students flock in here every morning just to catch a glimpse of him.” The former barista snorted. “What’d I tell you? They’re eating him right up.”
They waved at Jeongin now as he jogged obliviously out of the cafe, Hyunjin’s laughs muted by the glass as he threw you a knowing wink. He had graduated himself, two years ago, officially inheriting the business after his grandmother had passed away. Glow Cafe had since come a long way, with Hyunjin always at the forefront of new design ideas and enthusiastically telling you about his plans to expand even more in the future.
“Get this: ‘CEO Hwang, the most eligible bachelor of Miroh Heights,’” Felix held up his hands as if picturing a giant headline, giving his signature wolf whistle as you burst into laughter and Hyunjin kicked the blond man in the shin. “Ow!”
“How did you even get into the press with those cheesy titles?” Hyunjin groaned.
“Not just ‘get into the press’, ‘jinnie,” you reminded him, giggling, “he’s the head journalist now!”
It was true—with his impeccable wit and seamless way with words, it came to nobody’s surprise when Felix maneuvered his way to the top of the local press in a matter of years. The head of the press still loathed him with a biting passion— “I can feel her glares all the way from her office,” Felix retorted — and rumour had it that the two seemed to fire shots at each other all day long. The image of a powder-faced, middle-aged woman bickering with your notoriously insufferable best friend made you laugh, but you also knew deep down that Felix always took his job more seriously than he let on. His eloquent articles had gotten his name out across the city in no time, and so you took comfort in knowing that — no matter how hard the head of the press bared her teeth—nobody could touch Lee Felix now.
Five years, you thought to yourself wistfully, eyes catching a familiar detective’s office as Jeongin drove past. What a trip down memory lane. You’d seldom come by this part of town since then, and seeing the familiar buildings sent a flood of memories and mixed feelings stirring in your chest.
The well-loved Detective Bang, much to the disappointment of adoring students and professors alike, had moved abroad to a bigger city—whether he had been taken by a new precinct, or a new big case, you couldn’t be sure. “Rumour has it he’s doing undercover work now,” Seungmin had mentioned to you once in passing, “We haven’t heard from him in a while, but he’s making a big name for himself out there, that’s for sure.”
The District Nine police station whizzed by you in a blur, and more of the prosecutor’s words rang through your head.
“Meanwhile, the chief of police keeps insisting he’s glad to be rid of him, but we all know he secretly misses Chan.” Seungmin had shaken his head, and you had smiled at the image of the stoic police captain—chief, now—grudgingly sulking over the loss of his best friend.
Jeongin made one last turn, and the narrow buildings opened up into the heart of Miroh Heights—the oldest part of town, where the roller rink, record shop, and the diner were. The sight of Mia’s Diner made you sink down instinctively in the passenger seat, and you couldn’t keep the raw dread out of your voice as you let out a long sigh.
Jeongin gave you sympathetic look. “For someone who’s going on a blind date, you don’t sound too happy.”
“That’s because I’m not, Jeongin. I don’t even know why Felix keeps insisting on these. The last time I agreed to one was—” you broke off before you could finish what you were saying, the unspoken words echoing in your mind. The last time I agreed to one was when I met Jisung.
That’s right—the last official blind date you had been on, you had met Han Jisung — and he had turned your entire world upside down. For years afterwards, you had told yourself that you wouldn’t take that day back for the entire world, but now...now, you weren’t so sure.
After all, how could you be sure of someone you hadn’t heard from in over five years?
The rehabilitation centre didn’t allow letters in or out— you had learned that the hard way after your first letters had been sent directly back to your doorstep. Usually, they had told you, if things went well, patients could start correspondence again after a year or so—but you had gotten absolutely nothing. Not a single word.
Five years—he should have been out by now. He could have been anywhere, doing anything—but he certainly hadn’t remembered to write or even call you.
Had he really forgotten about you?
“Five years is a long time, y/n,” Felix told you gently, after you had adamantly refused the blind date he kept insisting on. “People...change, and maybe he’s—moved on.”
Moved on.
You didn’t know how to tell Felix how much the thought of that hurt more than you were willing to admit, how this was the sole reason why you hadn’t been able to go on a single date for the past five years. You didn’t know how to tell him that Jisung hadn’t left your mind since the moment he had disappeared from your sight, five years ago, in the corridor of that courthouse.
“I’ll be waiting,” Jisung had said. And yet he was nowhere to be found. Meanwhile, Felix wasn’t taking no for an answer.
“You’re in your mid-twenties now, y/n. Loosen up a little, yeah? You’re allowed to go on dates, for goodness’ sake.”
“I’m hopeless, ‘lix. I’m pretty sure the stray dog on the street has a more interesting love life than me.”
“Maybe,” Felix mused, “I think I saw it running around with a litter of puppies the other da—ow!”
“You okay? You look kind of sick,” Jeongin remarked, pulling you out of your thoughts. “Got everything you need?”
You resisted the urge to laugh. If only Jeongin knew how you had prepared for this date—by mapping out all the ways you were going to end it as quickly as possible. Faking food poisoning? Check. Arrange a time for a friend to call you and pretend an emergency came up? Check— although Hyunjin had had a strange glint in his eyes when he had agreed to it. Worst comes to worst? Pepper spray, check. You let out a slow exhale. “Sure. All set.”
You thanked Jeongin with a hug and hopped out of the car. Just as you began walking towards the diner, you heard him call out behind you.
“Oh, yeah, Felix told me pass on a message — from him to you.” You turned back, and Jeongin gave a boyish grin that was half apologetic, half laughing. “‘Go get ‘em, tiger!’”
You gave an exasperated cry and yanked open the diner door.
━━━━━━━━
You were beginning to wonder if you’d been stood up.
Mia’s Diner was usually busy, bustling with students and townspeople alike, and tonight it truly was: booths packed with couples both old and new, laughter and the smell of food wafting through the warm air as friends and families celebrated the start of summer. The jukebox was on and playing an old disco song you liked but didn’t know the name of, the checkered floor tiles clicking with the sounds of brisk waitresses’ heels and dancing feet.
You didn’t know why Felix had insisted on coming here, of all places, what with the mixed emotions and memories you had tied to it, but you had to admit that the jovial atmosphere of Mia’s Diner on a Friday night never really disappointed. You found yourself relaxing slightly—just slightly, bobbing your head lightly to the music.
“Mia’s Diner?” You repeated incredulously. “Seriously, Felix, do you only know one date location? For the so-called ‘Matchmaker of Miroh Heights’, you’re sure lacking in the variety department.”
“Easy, tiger. Just trust me on this one, okay? You’re gonna owe me one.”
“I’m not—” you began indignantly, but Felix continued.
“Plus, the poor guy in question hasn’t been on a date in years, either. You both need this.”
“Years? Are you setting me up with a hermit?”
“Oh, yeah. A big-time loser, seriously— but don’t tell him I said that. Just — indulge him a bit, okay, y/n? I promise you won’t regret it.”
And so, for the second time, Felix’s schemes and pleading puppy eyes had gotten you here—sitting at an empty booth, waiting for a blind date. He hadn’t even bothered to show you a picture of the man in question. You couldn’t help the smile from slowly slipping from your face as each minute passed, and you nibbled your lip anxiously.
Your date was thirty minutes late.
You peered out the window, at the lights of the town glowing a faint neon against the clear evening skies. Each time a car filled in a parking space, you sat up, craning your neck to see if it was him—before slumping back down in disappointment. Five years, you thought to yourself glumly. Five years, and you still had no luck with dates. Maybe you just had no luck with love, you thought dryly. You imagined Felix laughing later when you told him about it and sighed, a twinge of worry replacing the dread in your gut.
Had something gone wrong?
After turning the waitress away for the eighth time, you fished out your phone from your pocket, tapping on the foreign number Felix had given you. Zero new messages, zero missed calls. At least I can tell Felix I tried, you thought glumly. Maybe I should just call Jeongin again, and ask him to pick me up. And then you could drop by Glow Cafe for a bit, before trudging back to your apartment like a fallen soldier.
Just as you were punching in Jeongin’s name, feeling a sense of guilty relief wash over you, you vaguely registered the diner door swinging open beneath the lively music, and a pair of footsteps trying to shuffle past the dancing couples.
For a split second, you thought you saw a pair of tattered black Converse—laces untied, soles worn—but the mirage disappeared, and was replaced by a pair of dress shoes that eventually came to a stop at your booth. You sighed, fighting back the tears that had suddenly threatened to well in your eyes. Shit. This is not the time to be thinking about him. Why were you still thinking about him? And why on earth had you agreed to this?
You lifted your gaze, trying to muster up a smile, hoping your disappointment didn’t show on your face—
And immediately froze.
“Hello.”
Standing before you, looking almost like an apparition — a golden silhouette against the backdrop of the dim diner — was Han Jisung.
You had to blink several times to realise you weren’t hallucinating again. He looked...different, and yet in some ways, he looked entirely the same: his hair was shorter, but tousled as it had always been, cheeks flushed and breathless as if—as if he’d been running through a storm.
You felt your body moving before any intelligible thoughts could form in your head, pulling you forwards like a magnet until you were standing face-to-face, your shaky eyes darting across his features, not daring to believe what you were seeing.
All of a sudden, the glint in Hyunjin and Jeongin’s eyes made sense, Felix’s words replaying in your head as overwhelmed tears began welling in your eyes without warning.
“The poor guy in question hasn’t been on a date in years, either.”
“A big-time loser, seriously — but don’t tell him I said that. Just — indulge him a bit, okay, y/n? I promise you won’t regret it.”
“Y-you—are such a dork,” you stammered out, one hand weakly hitting Jisung’s chest as you felt the tears finally spill down your face. “Han Jisung, you are such a d—”
Your words were cut off when Jisung pulled you into his arms, his head falling to rest in the crook of your neck. Your shoulders shook with muffled sobs as you buried your face in his chest, memorising everything about this feeling, not wanting to take a single second for granted, memorising everything about him. Jisung no longer carried with him that scent of gasoline and fire — instead, he smelled faintly of lemongrass, and a hint of warm, fresh laundry.
“I missed you,” you finally whispered hoarsely, “I just—missed you, so much.”
He chuckled in your ear, the low, familiar hum stirring faint, faraway memories in your head, and you gripped onto his shirt harder, as if he would disappear completely if you didn’t hold on tight enough.
Jisung had found you in the crowded diner before you had seen him — just like the first time he had met you. And just like the first time, he had felt his breath hitch in his throat, hands hesitating on the door, wondering if he should turn back instead. He had watched you bob your head gently to the music, a small, tentative smile on your face.
You looked good — no, amazing. Different, and yet entirely the same. Kind, worried eyes catching him completely off guard, like the flash of a camera.
Just as bright.
Just as brilliant.
The truth was, there hadn’t been a single day where he hadn’t thought of you — of your voice, your touch, your laugh. Jisung had asked Felix for help the moment he had gotten released, but what he hadn’t forseen was your reaction.
“She won’t go on a blind date, mate,” Felix had informed him exasperatedly, “Took weeks of convincing. Good news, though — she finally caved. You sneaky, hopeless romantic bastard.”
She might have forgotten me, Jisung had thought. And even if you hadn’t, you might not even welcome the sight of him—after all, he hadn’t been in touch since he had left, all those years ago. But in the end, the inexplicable pull in his chest had grown unbearable, and he found himself walking towards you, wading through the crowd, feeling the ache in his heart softening with each step he took. All the way back to you.
You pulled away slowly, vision blurry as Jisung lifted a hand to cup your face, never taking eyes off yours. He had grown in the time you had been apart—he was taller, his once-lean frame stronger—and, most of all, there was a light in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.
“Hey, pretty girl,” he murmured softly, and you laughed in disbelief, “I think you’re my blind date.”
“How—w-why—”
“I told you I wanted to do this all over again, didn’t I? And I promised that I would try to do it right this time.” Jisung smiled apologetically, wiping your tear stained cheeks with his thumb. “I’m sorry it took so long.”
You shook your head, eyes widening when you saw what he had been carefully clutching in his other hand: a small bouquet of sunflowers, their golden yellow petals as tousled as Jisung’s own blond locks.
“Apparently they symbolise new beginnings,” Jisung said, pulling a stray petal from your hair and chuckling, “Keeping promises. Eternal happiness. That kind of thing.”
“Why didn’t you write?” You whispered, as Jisung tucked the bouquet into your hands.
“I wanted to...to heal. In every sense of the word. I didn’t want to show you, until I...knew I was really better. Believe me, I wanted to.” Jisung’s voice dropped to a whisper, as if he were fighting back tears. “I wanted to, so, so badly.”
You shook your head, mumbling something about how much of a stubborn idiot he was, and Jisung’s laugh made a hesitant smile tug at your lips. As if sensing the lightening atmosphere, the waitress had promptly appeared behind Jisung and meekly cleared her throat, setting down the menu. Jisung turned back to look at you, his grin growing playful.
“I hope you’re hungry?”
The diner seemed to come back to you all at once in a flood of senses, the music and murmur of restaurant goers sending a pleasant hum through your veins as you and Jisung sat down. The night went by in a warm blur, Jisung telling you about his life at the institute, the unlikely friends he had made, the dreams he hadn’t realised he had.
“I’m going to go back to school,” he admitted, one hand rubbing the back of his neck shyly. “I’ll be a bit behind, but...I want to study something I actually like this time.”
You had told him about how you had been working in a child therapy ward ever since you had graduated, about all the children you had met and loved and cared for. As you talked about them, you saw a wistful look in Jisung’s eyes, and a thought crossed your mind. “Have you heard anything from—from Minho?”
He gave a small smile, but shook his head. “Rarely. It hasn’t been long since he was released, but he said he was planning on going abroad. Doing some travelling. I think...he’ll reach out when he’s ready.” He then added, as an afterthought, “And if he doesn’t, I wouldn’t blame him.”
The sad simplicity of Jisung’s words stirred a strange feeling you couldn’t quite place in your chest, and your mind flashed back to the cold-eyed coroner and his stiff smiles; then, to the raw pain that had cracked through his strained features the last time you had caught a glimpse of him. Maybe you would meet again one day, or maybe that truly would be the last you ever heard of him.
Healing of the mind, you knew, was a strange process—one that always took much longer than you would expect. There were always scars that reopened along the way, old hidden wounds that surfaced right when you least expected them. There would always be answers you might never find, you mused sadly, closure you might never get.
But sometimes, you thought as you listened to Jisung talk, memorizing the feeling of his fingers interlaced with yours, sometimes we can only hope to hold onto what we already have.
The end of the night drew closer, and when Jisung and you had stepped outside the diner, the city was swimming in the dark ochre of the setting sun. Eventually, the two of you ended up back in the wide garden behind the hospital, your laughs and giddy conversation slowly hushing into softer murmurs. In the distance, the rush of cars on the main road grew sparser, the windows of the buildings around you flickering to life one by one like young stars. Here, though, as you rested your head on Jisung’s shoulder beneath a willow tree, the world seemed to stand still, and all was quiet.
You heard Jisung yelp suddenly and looked down to see a familiar dog pattering around your feet—a stray, with scraggly fur like an overgrown teddy bear that had been through the wash one too many times. It immediately pounced onto Jisung, beginning to lick your boyfriend’s face like no tomorrow.
“Oof! Hey there, old buddy.”
You laughed, scooping the dog off—only after it had gotten a few slobbery licks in—and shivered slightly as a cool night wind swept past you. Noticing, Jisung shrugged off his jacket, draping it over your shoulders as you raised a teasing eyebrow at the cliche move.
“It looks good on you,” Jisung insisted, and you laughed incredulously.
“Your jacket?” You asked, ruffling the dog’s ears as it curled up at your feet.
At that, Jisung looked back up at you—seeing the faint outline of your smile in the dark, your eyes sparkling as you looked back at him expectantly, obliviously—and in that moment, Jisung wondered what he had ever done to deserve someone as perfect as you.
After a beat, he replied, “Happiness. Happy looks good on you, love.”
Your mouth parted in surprise—both at his words, and at the unexpected name—and Jisung took the chance to lean in and kiss you, pressing his soft lips to yours. Gently, at first — carefully, but as you began to kiss him back, you felt Jisung slowly relax. You kissed him the way you had wanted to for so long, feeling the years of distance, of heartache, of endless waiting finally unravel beneath your lips. His hands reached up to gingerly cup your face, pulling you closer into him as if he never intended to let go.
Happy looks good on you, too, Han Jisung, you wanted to say once you pulled away, forehead still lightly pressed to his. And you deserve it, more than anything. You watched Jisung’s features come back into focus beneath the dim moonlight. His gaze was fixed on yours, filled with nothing but pure adoration, and you felt a sudden surge of warmth coursing through your chest.
I love you, you wanted to tell him, more than you could ever know — but something in the warm yet playful look in Jisung’s eyes told you that he was already thinking the exact same thing.
So you just smiled, and leaned in to kiss him again.

YOUNG GOD | END

ryu says: to you — yes, you, who has reached the end of this series! this epilogue is my way of saying a big thank you to those who stayed along for the entire wild ride that was young god. thank you for loving the characters, the world of miroh heights, and of course, the story! there are easter eggs and full-circle moments all throughout this epilogue, so i hope you enjoy and have fun finding them all ^^
disclaimer: in my opinion, all epilogues are open to interpretation: i’ve left some characters’ stories untold, some loose ends untied for this exact reason. miroh heights’ story has finally come to a close here, but what happens to the characters from this moment on continues in the reader’s mind now.
all that cheesy, pretentious stuff aside, i hope to see you in the next story!
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