#reproductive coercion

[blackswallowtailbutterfly]

I think there's some confusion on the post I made about holding men responsible for unwanted pregnancies. A chosen abortion is in fact rarely traumatizing. The most commonly reported feeling afterward is relief. From firsthand experience, having had an abortion myself, I can say "relief" is the closest approximation of how I felt but it falls woefully short.

It's the unwanted pregnancy that's traumatizing. That fucking stays with you. That sense of panic, of your body not being your own, of feeling like a trapped animal, I don't wish that on any woman or girl, and that's my point: in order to get to the point of needing an abortion, she still has to be pregnant first, and that is hell. Absolute hell.

So it's not about men getting out of the responsibility of being a father (though, yes, plenty of men do support abortion for this reason). He could be the most willing father in the world (and there are also men who fit the bill here; reproductive coercion is a thing), and that still isn't going to make up for the fact that he made a woman pregnant when she didn't want to be.

So that's what I mean when I say the fact there are so many abortions happening reveals a huge problem. 1 in 3 women are suffering through pregnancies they don't want for however long it takes for them to be able to get rid of it (not to mention all the women who can't get rid of it and forced to carry to term). All because men are irresponsible or coercive.

I would like to see abortion become less not because abortion is wrong--it's good, actually--but because I want to see far, far, far less women and girls having to suffer weeks or more of pregnancies they don't want.

[odinsblog]

States with Republican governors or that are controlled by a majority of Republicans are going back to the 1970s and as far back as the 1860s to pull out misogynistic laws against women. And please don’t mistakenly believe that this tactic will stop at controlling women only. Think about all of the homophobic, ableist, racist laws that existed wayback then and are still on the books. This trend of reproductive coercion by way of outdated laws is a blueprint for Republicans. Vote every conservative politician out of office in every election and at every opportunity.

[hellyeahscarleteen]

"Reproductive coercion involves elements of ownership, control, and violence. This kind of abuse⁠ can take many forms, like poking holes in condoms, or pressuring a partner to become pregnant using threats of violence or other kinds of abuse. It can occur at any time in a relationship⁠, and is sometimes classified as being “pre-intercourse⁠,” “during intercourse” and “post-intercourse" depending on where in a sexual⁠ interaction it falls. Reproductive coercion includes:

Pressuring a partner to get pregnant and/or create a pregnancy⁠.

Threatening or manipulating someone about contraception⁠, like one partner telling another that they will leave them if they have to wear a condom⁠, or if they use birth control.

Trying to exert control over birth control methods like hiding or throwing away a partner’s birth control pills, condoms or emergency contraception⁠; forcibly removing a partner’s intrauterine device, or pulling off contraceptive patches.

Controlling -- like stealing -- a partner’s finances so they cannot pay for birth control methods or abortion⁠. 

Birth control sabotage  – like poking holes in a condom, refusing to pull out when that’s what has been agreed upon, or ejaculating inside a partner without consent⁠.

Coercion during intercourse can also involve removing condoms during intercourse without a partner’s consent, a behavior recently called “stealthing⁠" by some of those who engage in this abuse in an attempt to normalize it, and make it seem like something that isn't abusive (it is). A new study argues that “stealthing” is an act of gender-based violence that should be punishable by law, as it puts the individual at a potential and unagreed upon risk for STIs and/or pregnancy. The same study found that "stealthing" is alarmingly common.

Pushing for unprotected intercourse (or intercourse, period⁠) when the other person made clear before or during sexual activity that is not something they want to do.

Pregnancy pressure, or pregnancy coercion: Pregnancy outcome occurs after someone becomes pregnant, and their partner, usually through emotional manipulation and abuse, coerces them to remain pregnant or terminate a pregnancy, for example threatening to leave or hurt themselves, the partner or others if they choose abortion. 

Raping a partner with the intent to impregnate them is also a documented form of pregnancy coercion.

Pregnancy outcome control involves someone coercing their partner to make a decision about an already existing pregnancy against their will."

From Reproductive Coercion: An intimate partner violence you might be overlooking by Caroline Reilly

[rapeculturerealities]

Abortion bans and domestic violence: Homicide is a leading cause of death for pregnant people.

Are there any numbers that show how the Dobbs decision has impacted any of these things, either the homicide rate for pregnant women or reproductive coercion?

The National Domestic Violence Hotline said that there was a 98 percent increase in reports of reproductive coercion the year after Dobbs, compared to the year before—more than 2,400 callers, the year after, reporting experiencing some form of reproductive coercion, compared to about 1,200 callers the year before that decision.

Were people referencing the law?

Some of the callers were saying that their abusers were referencing the abortion ban in their state. And this is also, broadly, a tactic that experts expect to increase. Basically, when the state hands down these abortion restrictions, it can wind up enabling abusers because it suggests that the state has no interest in giving them access to abortion and supporting their reproductive autonomy. So, it’s something that an abuser can also restrict. And it does sound like, from the anecdotes that I heard, sometimes this is what people are reporting.

[haggishlyhagging]

The use of multiple women in families for reproduction is grounded in many religious patriarchal traditions. Men took an array of wives and concubines, not only for sex but also to reproduce. The reproductive use of multiple women was culturally and religiously legitimated as extended family, otherwise known as polygyny. In ancient Israel, for example, a large family, in particular a large number of sons, was regarded as a blessing from Yahweh. The desire for progeny was partially responsible for the system of multiple wives and concubinage. Surrogacy, especially family surrogacy, replicates this model, with the man inseminating a female family member in order to reproduce "his issue." As one commentator noted, we are really talking not only about surrogate mothers, but about "surrogate wives."

The potential for women's exploitation is not necessarily less when no money is involved and reproductive arrangements take place among family members. In fact, the family is the least safe place for women. More women are sexually abused, battered, and killed in the family context than anyplace else. Yet most of the literature on family surrogacy—sisters bearing children for sisters, for example—romanticizes the family as the foremost place of protection. However, unique affective "inducements" exist in familial contexts that do not exist elsewhere. Although there is no legal "coercion of contract" or perhaps no "inducement" of money, there could be the coercion of family ties, in which having a baby for a sister or another family member may be rationalized as the "greatest gift" one woman can give to another. In these family situations, sisterhood becomes surrogacy; that is, sister love is equated with one sister becoming pregnant for her sibling. Yet, rather than surrogacy enhancing sisterhood, is it not exploiting a sister to put her at risk physically and psychologically? As one woman wrote, "What kind of a society do we live in, that would condone women using other women in this way?"

Gifts often have an operative role and power in shaping family life, as in social life in general. In The Gift: Forms and Functions of Exchange in Archaic Societies, anthropologist Marcel Mauss contends that gifts fulfill certain obligations. These obligations vary, but in all instances, whether gifts are used to maintain social affection or to promote unity or loyalty within the group, they are experienced in some way as prescriptive and exacting. This is true on a cultural level, as Mauss has pointed out, but it is even more true on a family level, the context most often cited as the desirable site of altruistic reproductive exchanges.

Family opinion may not force a woman, in the sense of being out-rightly coercive, to become pregnant for another family member. Where family integration is strong, however, the nature of family opinion may be so engulfing that, for all practical purposes, it exacts a reproductive donation from a female source. When a surrogate arrangement is represented as generosity to a family member in need, the ideal of altruism binds the woman to the norms of family duty.

Within families, it may be considered selfish, uncaring, and even dishonorable for a woman to deprive a relative of eggs, fetal tissue, or her gestating abilities. The category of altruism itself is broadened in family contexts to include all sorts of nontraditional reproductive duties that would be frowned on if women did these for money. Within families, it may be considered selfish for an infertile woman to deprive her husband of children by not allowing the use of another female family member, especially because the arrangements will be kept within the family.

It is also likely that those with less power in the family will be expected to be more altruistic. Indeed, their altruism may be outrightly coerced, as happened to Alejandra Muñoz. Muñoz, a poor, illiterate Mexican woman, was brought across the U.S. border illegally to bear a child for relatives at the urging of family members. Told by relatives that if she became pregnant the embryo would be flushed out and transferred to the womb of her cousin, Muñoz was deceived about her reproductive role. When this embryo transfer did not happen, Muñoz vowed to end the pregnancy and was thwarted by family members who kept her under house confinement until the delivery. When she fought to keep her child, she was threatened with exposure as an illegal alien. In family surrogate arrangements, relatives do the brokering. Family members are inevitably used as essential intermediaries and gatekeepers between the woman and the would-be recipients of a child.

And women are still negotiated by family agents, whether for money or for free. We should also not assume that, because surrogate arrangements occur within the family context, no money changes hands. Increasingly many relatives accept a "return gift" for their services. In the realm of organ donations, by comparison, Dr. James Light of the Washington (D.C.) Hospital Center, one of the nation's largest transplant centers, estimates that some economic benefit accrues to 15 to 20 percent of living organ donors who give to a relative.

-Janice G. Raymond, Women as Wombs

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

One’s control over one’s own body is one of the most fundamental rights a person can have.

Autonomy over their body. Autonomy over their actions. Autonomy over the choice of when, or if, they have a child.

There are important conversations to be had around how or when a man should be able to exercise such choices.

Should a man be legally compelled to finance a child he never wanted?

Should a man be able to opt out of parenthood post-conception?

These are difficult questions to answer and require time to discuss and better understand.

But what doesn’t require any further discussion, is what happens if a woman uses a man’s sperm to impregnate herself, without his knowledge, and against his will?

Such a thing must surely be illegal, and yet, in most states, and many cases, it is not.

And yes, you may well be reaching for the “well that is extremely rare” reaction, when you hear about such a situation…

Until you find out that one in ten American men have had a partner try to get themselves pregnant, when they did not want them too.

And that is terrifying.

Slowly the world is catching up in protecting women from these kind of malevolent actions, ‘stealthing’ for example, which is the removal of a condom without permission, is widely being made illegal, as it should be.

But what about a product that allows a woman to fish a used condom out of a bin, and use the contents to impregnate herself?

Well, that is not illegal, and certainly should be.

So, let’s take a look at a product and a set of adverts I wish didn’t exist, but sadly do…

Let me show you, ‘The Impregnator’…

-

Stats on Reproductive Coercion: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31808711/

[isawthismeme]

[coochiequeens]

Sounds like the guy knew he was losing control of his wife so he said nothing about the termination until after so he could use it to make her life hell and possibly make money by suing her friends.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2023/05/04/texas-abortion-wrongful-death-countersuit/

After a Texas woman got a positive result on the home-pregnancy test she took in July, she texted two friends to discuss her options, according to a new countersuit.

A trigger law banning all abortions would take effect in her state in August, about two months following the overturning of Roe v. Wade. Abortions were already illegal in Texas after the six-week mark. Another law had also made prescribing abortion pills online or mailing them to Texans illegal, which the woman and her friends discussed, the complaint states.

The woman had decided to end the pregnancy, according to the countersuit, filed in the District Court of Galveston County on Monday.

“Not questioning if this is what needs to happen,” she allegedly texted her friends. “I know it does.”

She took abortion medication on July 14, the suit states. Months later, in early March, her ex-husband filed a wrongful-death lawsuit against three women — including the two friends he said she had texted over the summer — whom he accused of being involved “in the murder of his child.”

On Monday, the two women filed a countersuit, alleging that their friend’s ex-husband was aware that his then-wife had wanted to terminate her pregnancy after he “illegally accessed” her phone without consent.

“He wasn’t interested in stopping her from terminating a possible pregnancy,” the countersuit claims.

Attorneys for the two women and the ex-husband did not respond to requests for comment. The ex-wife is not a named party in either lawsuit. Under Texas law, a pregnant patient who has an abortion cannot face criminal, civil or administrative liability or penalties.

The husband filed the original wrongful death lawsuit on March 9 in Galveston County, Tex.

In the suit, he alleged that the two friends assisted in “murdering [the] unborn child with illegally obtained abortion pills” that were acquired from a third woman. The complaint claims that the wife hid the pregnancy and had a medication abortion “without [his] knowledge or consent.”

The married couple finalized their divorce in February. The husband’s complaint states that he brought the lawsuit after he had “recently learned of the defendants’ involvement in the murder of his child.” His lawsuit was among the first of its kind since Roe v. Wade was overturned, the Texas Tribune reported.

On July 12, the husband allegedly dug through his wife’s purse without her knowledge, according to the countersuit. He found a Post-it note with the number for an abortion clinic, and he read messages on her phone between her and her two friends about her “possible pregnancy and her desire to terminate it,” according to the document, citing a police report he later filed.

The next day, he looked through his wife’s purse again, the countersuit alleges.

This time, according to the friends’ countersuit, he found a small white pill labeled “MF” and learned it was mifepristone, which can be taken to terminate an early pregnancy. The friends allege that he placed the medication back in her purse and did not say anything to her about it that day.

The wife took the abortion medication the following day, on July 14, the countersuit states. Four days later, he went to the League City Police Department to file a report about his wife’s “intent to terminate the possible pregnancy,” according to a photo of the incident report that was included in the countersuit. The man also told police he had “accessed [his wife’s] phone without her permission,” the countersuit alleges, citing the police report.

The League City Police Department did not respond to a request for comment.

After talking with police, the husband began to “threaten and try to control” his then-wife about the medication, according to the countersuit. His wife allegedly texted her friends to say: “So basically because I didn’t tell him in the first place that I was in that position he’s using it against me.”

The countersuit alleges that the husband threatened to have his wife “‘thrown in jail’ if she did not give herself to him ‘mind body and soul.’”

The friends’ lawsuit accuses the husband of violating Texas’s Harmful Access by Computer Act by reading the messages between his ex-wife and the two women, as well as taking screenshots of the correspondence without their permission.

The legislation allows Texans to sue those who have accessed a computer, computer network or computer system that they own without their consent. When the husband allegedly accessed his wife’s phone, he harmed the two friends, the countersuit claims, causing them to “suffer damages and losses.”

The countersuit also argues that the husband violated the friends’ right to privacy when he allegedly read their conversations with his then-wife.

By Praveena Somasundaram

[trueadventuresofthemind]

The original said “no magic” but I fixed it.

[mental-mona]

However bad you think it is, it's probably worse. Read the article and be furious.

[olddirtybadfic]

Invasion: Circe's Bedside Manner Could Use Some Work (Part three of three)

The sound of the Tombstone of Life and Death being abused booms in the distance. Teen!me seems to have thought this an adequate end for the fic. Adult!me knows otherwise.

Part one is here. Part two is here.

Content Warning: Rape/noncon mention and aftermath; character assassination of Buzz Grunt; mpreg and hermaphroditism being normal for Sims; depiction of the Beaker household as not being a den of unethical experimentation; Loki and Nervous are apparently adoptive brothers in this; Loki has feelings about his parentage; pretty sure Circe convincing Loki to keep the rape baby was a bad idea; attempt at depicting trauma responses; giving Vidcund a past anorexia issue sure was a choice that I made

-O-o-O-o-O-

Pascal absentmindedly stirred the chili for lunch. It was looking a little black on the edges, but that was the farthest thing from his mind at the moment.

“Nervous seemed rather irritable today. If there’s something on his mind, why doesn’t he just tell me what it is?”

Pascal was brought back to reality by the smell of burning food. He looked down. “Just perfect.”

His brothers didn’t seem to mind. Lazlo still shoveled the charred food into his mouth like he hadn’t eaten in a week.

“Slow down; you’ll choke,” Pascal deadpanned. Manners were lost on that boy.

Vidcund only picked at his food, but not because it was burnt. He’d been awfully quiet since the night before and he hadn’t said a word since lunch was served.

“Aren’t you hungry?” Lazlo asked.

“Not particularly,” Vidcund responded, scraping his spoon across the blackened mess.

“Vidcund, you skipped breakfast. You need to eat sometime,” Pascal prodded, not sure if the lack of cooking skill or something else killed Vidcund’s appetite.

Vidcund absently scooped up a spoonful of chili and ate it. Pascal stared, incredulous, while Lazlo looked amused.

“It doesn’t bother you that it’s burnt?”

“Hadn’t noticed.”

Eventually Vidcund did notice it was burnt and both he and Pascal had to excuse themselves, leaving Lazlo to dig into the leftovers.

Pascal pulled Vidcund into their plant room. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course everything’s fine. Why wouldn’t it be?” Vidcund’s voice sounded miles away.

“You’re spacey, quiet, and lacking an appetite,” Pascal noted. “You’re not starving yourself again, are you?”

“No.” This time, Vidcund’s voice was in Pascal’s face and firm. He didn’t like to be reminded of his short bout of anorexia.

“Then what’s wrong?”

Vidcund looked at the floor.

“Nervous won’t tell me what’s bothering him, you won’t tell me why you’re upset. How am I supposed to do my oldest brother job of fixing everything if I don’t know what’s going on?”

“I don’t think this can be fixed, Pascal,” Vidcund answered quietly.

“But I can at least try to make you feel better.”

Vidcund sighed. “Last night, I was looking at the stars. I wasn’t trying to look at what other people were doing, really, but I made a mistake in re-angling the telescope and I could see into this alleyway, and….” He trailed off.

“What did you see?” Pascal prompted.

Vidcund wouldn’t look at Pascal as he continued. “Buzz was standing over Loki, and….and Loki was tied up with his pants pulled down. Buzz was over him with his pants down….”

Pascal was speechless. “This must’ve been what Nervous was so upset about. I’m not too fond of Loki, but he sure as hell didn’t deserve that.”

“I want to tell the police, but what if Loki doesn’t want anyone to know? Even if I did tell them, Buzz would get basically a slap on the wrist and that’s it. Plus, he’d come after Loki and Nervous, and maybe even us.”

Pascal had barely regained his speech. So all he said was, “Why don’t we talk more later?”

Vidcund had no choice but to agree.

-O-o-O-

Circe was cooking dinner. Like, Pascal, she was preoccupied, but not so much that she burned the food. Usually Loki would cook, but he deserved a break, especially after what just happened.

Loki scrubbed away at the shower tiles. He’d been cleaning all evening and he barely noticed when it began to get dark. He didn’t care. Just as long as it helped him forget the encounter with Buzz, he didn’t care how long he took. The rhythmic squeak of the sponge on the tiles was the only thing keeping Loki from collapsing into tears.

He was always too busy to clean. In actuality, Loki loved cleaning. But now it seemed as thought cleaning was relegated to the “only for comfort” category. Considering how behind he was on it, he’d have a lot of comfort.

“As long as I keep busy,” Loki thought, “I’ll be fine. It worked for my father’s death; it’ll work now.”

He was so lost in thought, he barely heard Circe calling him for dinner.

Circe was setting the bowls of chili on the table when Loki came in. At first, she was glad that he seemed less distressed, but he didn’t seem much better than he’d been that afternoon. When she really thought about it, he seemed worse. It didn’t help that he was even paler than usual.

Loki wandered into the kitchen, his mind on autopilot. He wasn’t that hungry—actually, he’d felt a slight twinge of nausea earlier. But he had to eat, and Circe had actually cooked. She could’ve just ordered out.

Loki managed to whisper a thanks to Circe before they both sat down to eat. Nervous wouldn’t be joining them; he’d gotten dinner earlier then retired to his room for the night.

The meal began, but they hardly ate. Circe nibbled on hers, realizing she’d forgotten the chili powder. Though, judging by Loki’s interactions with his food, that was probably a good thing.

Loki was only picking at his food. Circe figured he must not be very hungry, what with all that had gone on. But then, the little color left in Loki’s face drained away and he ran from the room, covering his mouth.

She found him in the downstairs bathroom, wiping his mouth with toilet paper.

“Was it that bad?” she asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Loki leaned his head on the toilet. “It was fine, Circe. I’m just not feeling very well right now. It’s probably just from breathing in those cleaning chemicals for so long.”

Circe sighed. This was really not Loki’s week, was it. “Okay, but you have to eat something. I think there are crackers in the pantry—”

Loki scrambled to lift the lid and threw up into the toilet again.

“Or I could just not talk about food anymore.”

Loki wiped his mouth. “I’m not really very hungry, anyway. I probably just need to get some sleep. I’m sure I’ll be better in the morning.”

-O-o-O-

That night, the Beakers slept a lot better, having figured out how to keep Loki from screaming himself awake. Circe and Loki lay cuddled up to each other, Circe, relieved that Loki wasn’t afraid of her touching him, and Loki, hoping that this was a sign of him beginning to heal.

Morning found Circe alone in bed, the covers on Loki’s side tossed haphazardly to the side.

A quiet sniffle from the master bathroom informed her of his whereabouts. She found Loki poised over the toilet, throwing up. She knelt next to him while he wiped his mouth.

“So I was wrong last night,” Loki said quietly, flushing the toilet.

“Maybe you should stay away from those cleaning products today,” Circe suggested. “Although, I’ve never seen anyone get sick from being around those particular cleaning products for too long unless there were huffing them.”

“They don’t even have ammonia in them.”

Circe thought for a minute. “Come to think of it,” she said quietly, “ I don’t think it’s the cleaning products that are making you sick.”

Loki remained silent. His eyes slowly met Circe’s, then both pairs wandered to the medicine cabinet where the box of pregnancy tests were kept.

“You don’t think…” Loki trailed off.

“I’ve seen the symptoms before. It wouldn’t hurt to try it.”

So Circe averted her gaze while Loki peed on the plastic stick. Then they waited for the results. One line meant negative, two lines meant positive.

There was much twiddling of thumbs and nervous shifting as the two waited the obligatory two minutes for the results. Finally, at the end of the two minutes, they looked at the result window and saw two blue lines.

Circe ran her hand through her red hair. “Okay….Let’s not panic. This isn’t the end of the world.”

Loki hid his face in his arms. “I cannot believe I’m pregnant by him.”

“Maybe it’s a false positive,” Circe said. “These tests aren’t always accurate, unless they’re those new Tombstone brand ones. Let me see the box.”

Circe picked up the box from where it had been casually tossed under the toilet and examined it. Sure enough, the cartoon of the Grim Reaper stating “Dead right!” was printed on the side, along with the tombstone logo. She let out a breath. “So it is true. Well….You still have a few options.”

“I don’t want it.”

“You haven’t even heard—”

“I don’t care. I don’t want it.”

“You’ve always said you wanted a child.”

“Not like this! This wouldn’t be our child; it’d be Buzz’s and my child.” Loki got up to go to the bedroom.

“We could raise it as ours.”

Loki turned to face Circe. “What do you think the kid’s going to think when he realizes he looks nothing like you? He’s going to ask us who his real parents are and we’re going to have to tell him that the only reason he’s here is because I got raped!”

Circe was silent. Loki didn’t yell like this often.

“Do you know what it’s like to know that you were an accident?” Loki continued much more quietly.

“Loki, your mother was drunk when she told you that. It means nothing.”

“She may have been drunk, but it’s true. I did the math. She and my father married just a mere five months before I was born. No one in their right mind plans to get that far along before they get married. My father was the one who got pregnant and he couldn’t abort me, so he and my mother had to get married.” Loki sniffed. “I would never want my child to have any reason to even suspect such a thing.”

Circe slowly approached Loki. “But there’s something you haven’t factored in.”

“What?”

“We would never act as though we didn’t want the child. Your father kept it together, but your mother…From what you’ve told me, she wasn’t that nice to you. Add the fact that she drank a lot and you’ve got a formula for trouble. But you’re not your mother, Loki.” Circe put her arms around Loki. “I’m not saying you should keep the baby if you don’t want it. I’m saying that if you do, you won’t mess it up.”

Loki thought for a while, staring at the ground. “In any other situation, I would abort it….But we’ve wanted a child since the second year of our marriage. And it’s not just Buzz’s child; it’s mine, too. And it will be yours as well.”

-O-o-O-o-O-

Moral of the story: If your husband (or wife) gets raped by the neighborhood alien-hating bully, just let him have the abortion.

[quality-street-rat]

Kin stuff, mdni

Trigun, under the cut

Offered myself up as a solution. Just like always. Nai wanted more independents? Great, don't use our sisters, use me. I'll do it. I'll be your prince locked in a tower, just stop hurting people.

He took my offer. The first few days was just him trying desperately. And after, when the pregnancy test was negative, and he came to me to ask how I was doing, I assumed he was just there to try again. Offered myself up, casually, matter of factly. When he asked me if I wanted to try again, I said that what I wanted didn't matter. Because I'd agreed to stay, to be breeding stock.

He didn't like that. He said that he knew it hurt me, when he took me. I couldn't pretend I was fine anymore. Who cares? I asked him. It's not so bad after the first few times, I said. And he said it's not supposed to hurt at all.

News to me. But what I wanted didn't matter anymore. So I let him do what he wanted.

[hellyeahscarleteen]

'Has a sexual partner ever made you feel uncomfortable about wanting and using birth control? Have they ever pressured you not to use it, like by trying to talk you out of it by telling you you don't really need it? Do you feel like you can't talk to your partner about making those choices? Has a partner ever deliberately hidden, stolen, or sabotaged your birth control? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may have experienced or may be experiencing a form of intimate partner violence known as reproductive coercion, which is generally defined as someone’s attempt to exert control and power over their partner’s reproductive health choices, often, but not always, with the intention of making them become pregnant.'

[turquoisepaws]

Anti-natalists and inhumane slaughterhouse workers can go to hell. If you or someone you witness is involved in such situations, report ASAP. The hotline for reproductive coercion is either the national Planned Parenthood or The National Domestic Violence hotline 1-800-799-7233. The hotline for animal abuse is either an agency or 911.

[cozycabineer]

Not sleeping with men does not make lesbians, aka female homosexuals, misogynists. Not sleeping with men is not misogyny. Lesbians do not have to sleep with men. It is great to be relieved and overjoyed that misogynistic, homophobic, society that views females as nothing more than reproductive resources hasn't successfully coerced you into "letting" a man rape you. It is great to not be coerced or forced to "let" a man rape you. No one is "twisting your words;" you used them clearly, precisely, concisely, and directly.

Every lesbian who has "slept with" (aka: "'consented' to sex with") a man was coerced. Coercion cannot be consent. Force is not consent, either. Successful coercion is rape; failed coercion is sexual harassment and often sexual assault.

We do not have to be raped to not be misogynists. We do not owe you being raped to be not deemed all misogynists.

A lesbian who has been raped, by method of coercion or force, is a gold star, just as a lesbian who has not been. A woman who sleeps with men because she's attracted to them is not a lesbian.