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hellowoolf · 15 days ago

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something, somehow, someday

chapter 3: sun stall | prev | next | series masterlist

series summary: you know you will love satoru for the rest of your life, but when you wake with his cursed energy in your navel there is no option but to flee. what future is there for a child of a god? at 18 satoru is without you, and you make off with a piece of him you hoped he'd never meet.

pairing: secret baby daddy!gojo x reader

tags: secret child trope, angst (lots), eventual fluff, eventual smut, hurt/comfort, a lot of yearning :P

a/n: i have a poll up on chapter length so if you have an opinion please vote! it's been tied up almost the whole way, and the poll will end around sunday. also, as always, feel free to send asks about context/content, i know i can be...sparse sometimes >:) i love you all

18+! minors dni <3

~~~~~~~

SATORU, for his part, never resented you for leaving. he missed you almost masochistically: he dreamt of you on purpose, refused outright to forget, dragged your memory behind him, the whole comatose body of it. but soon after your leaving he failed so spectacularly at protecting amanai, and suguru defected not long after. he lost that year in totality to his own failure, to a boundless and indiscriminate wash of waste and desecration. it was everywhere. and so covered in it as he was, it was impossible to discern the particulars; your disappearance was a limb to a much larger, beastly thing.

for a time he hated himself for losing two of the most important people in his life, though even that he had to abandon for megumi and tsumiki’s sake. by the time he had enough clarity to truly wonder why you left, he had the sense to recognize that returning to 2006 could do him no good. so no, there has been no hatred—in fact, he doesn’t think he could ever hate you—only a quiet wanting, the remainder of the ways he once loved you, and your koi fish in the stream.

he hasn’t spent much time in this part of tokyo. shoko seems to have crested her temporary calm and dissolved again into a tremor satoru pretends not to see. she scans the neighborhood with fear and appetite in equal measure and he finds himself doing the same. she stops suddenly, remembering something.

“you should take off your blindfold.”

his brows pinch together. “ha?” it doesn’t come out cruel so much as confused.

shoko makes an expectant face: you are at my mercy. satoru continues walking as he slips a finger behind the fabric and pulls it off. “you know, it’s cruel to string me along in the dark like this. just because you know something i don’t doesn’t mean you can prey on me,” he mutters.

shoko scoffs. “you think i’m enjoying this?”

“yeah, actually, i think you are at least a little bit,” he bites.

“gojo, i have scanned medical records, cctv footage, eye witness accounts—god i got teachers at the kyoto school involved for this—”

a small grin slides over satoru’s face. “utahime?”

shoko’s annoyance persists. “i’ve put years into doing this for you and you can’t offer me the courtesy of trusting me? this one time? after i’ve done something so monumental on your behalf? jesus, gojo, you really are—”

something behind satoru’s ribs turns over once, twice, snaps open. there are teeth in his sternum. he feels it all before he sees it, the tug to square his shoulders towards something, the echo of the person he used to be bellowing something inside of him, but he can’t make any of it out. he sees his eyes first, they’re his eyes, looking over your shoulder. they look frightened; he’s never seen his own eyes so afraid before.

there are a few things satoru knows immediately and a few others that are slower on the uptake. that is his child—this point is undeniable, though there isn’t much internalization that can happen right at this moment—and you are his mother. he would know you anywhere, he would know you in the dark, he would know you senseless, and he certainly knows you like this, eyes wide open and ten yards away. your back is turned and satoru also knows, right then, that you cannot sense him yet.

the kid does, though. he looks like a ghost, embraced in your arms, an eerie reconstruction of himself at that age. satoru wonders now if everyone found him as incandescently striking looking as he now finds this child, or whether it’s because it’s his. his child. there are no words or musings in him, only this feeling, the bite of wonderment and love and hurt. the latter, he thinks, wins out on his face.

the child whispers something in your ear and your back straightens. you shake your head a little, and the movement lets satoru see the side of your face for a brief and monumental second. god, you are just as terribly lovely as the day you left. there are more whispers between you and you stand, slowly, and satoru sees that you are now terrified, too. you come all the way up before you turn.

there is only a deep breath’s worth of time spent like this: satoru, frozen on the sidewalk and as helpless as he’s ever been, you, eyes wide, refusing to panic but nonetheless knowing that everything has changed, and your baby, the siphoning of each of you, stepped now in front of your legs. and that’s the worst part, satoru thinks. yes, it may be the most awful thing to have ever happened to him that this child worries satoru may hurt you. shoko and the neighborhood fade, blurred on the periphery of this little massacre shared among the three of you.

satoru moves first. a step towards you, and then another. you don’t make to protect your son, he knows you know that you don’t have to, but the boy clings to your knee behind him, so furious somehow and so petrified, and most of all determined to keep you safe. for one of the first times in his life satoru is glad for his six eyes; he can look at you both at once.

when he arrives at the altar of your feet satoru squats to his son’s level. it occurs to him only then that he must recognize satoru as his father; if he knows at all what his own face looks like then it would be impossible to miss it.

the belated circumstances arrive in satoru’s head; this child has cursed energy, he has a cursed technique, he’s using it right now. satoru extends a hand towards the boy slowly, pauses each time he flinches, until suddenly his palm just…stops. whatever was left holding him upright leaks out his ears now as satoru sinks all the way to his knees.

your voice, against all odds, is even. “it’s okay, takara.” takara. he slumps a little as he relaxes, but keeps a chubby arm barring your legs from moving forward. you drop to the ground anyway, tears streaming down your face, and they look like they burn.

“say something,” you plead quietly.

satoru wrenches your name from his mouth like a death rattle. “what can i say? what do you want me to say?”

you shake your head, “i don’t know, i—i’m sorry. i can’t—you were never meant to meet him.”

“and what? you were just gonna keep him from me forever?”

you almost look confused as to how he couldn’t understand. “of course i was. he is your son, satoru. if people knew they would take him,” your voice raises only a fraction, “nobody could protect him from the onslaught of people who would use him to hurt you,” your words sound like sobs, they are heartbreaking, but you continue, “it was all i could do to protect you both.”

“and what about you? what about your protection? i could have been there for you and for him—”

“satoru, stop.”

“no, be serious with me. be honest with me. don’t you owe me that?” he’s almost manic now, so angry and so devastated and it bares itself in his voice, “how could you have decided without me?”

satoru wonders if you’d be yelling at him if takara wasn’t between you, but as it is you keep two hands on your volume. “i was practically a child! and so were you! i did what i thought was best. i did it for you. how could you ever be a father? i couldn’t burden you with that responsibility, there was too much on you already!”

satoru shakes with a terrible laughter. “and yet i ended up halfway to parenthood anyway!” he exclaims.

you suck in a breath. “what does that mean?”

where does he even begin? he tries his best to keep himself human but god how could you rob him of this? “i took in two zenin kids around when suguru defected.”

this information only slows you down for a moment before your face twists again. you had heard about suguru’s defection; yaga left you a voicemail, worried he’d seek you out. it’s one of the only times you had to well and fully restrain yourself from reaching out to satoru, who had loved geto voraciously, you think. you cast the thought aside and say again, slower, “i felt like i had no options. no way out but…away. i knew what you’d do if i told you.”

and this is by far the most devastating thing you’d said to him so far. to acknowledge how deeply he cared for you seared you both, each of you shuddering with the memory. satoru practically whispers, “i can’t believe you took this from me…took him from me.”

the words rush out of your lips faster now. “i never wanted to hurt you, not ever, and that’s why i left. i stand by that choice.” you poke your pointer finger into his chest and he lets you. “he’s gotten to live free from us.”

satoru grabs your wrist and keeps it close, firm but gentle, still. even feeling so betrayed by a version of you gone by he seeks your touch for comfort: his fingers wrap around to your pulse to feel you living. neither of you think much about how physically familiar you remain to one another. “he has my technique.”

you both look at takara now, the first time since you began arguing. he looks even smaller up close, satoru thinks. his hands are wrung behind his back and his toes point in but he does not look at all confused. it’s clear to the both of you that he’s understood every word, or at least the meaning, and his eyes well with the knowing but he refuses to loosen. he stands stiff as satoru tilts his head and holds his hand out, releasing your wrist.

“my name is satoru.”

~~~~~~~

YOU cannot, try as you might, reconcile satoru gojo in your living room. takara points out his various toys at your request, and satoru watches him intently, nods when takara glances up at him. shoko had slipped quietly away watching the tableau of the three of you at the park, and against your better judgment you had let satoru through your front door; the two of them are blinding, beaming in each others company despite takara’s trepidation and satoru’s lingering hurt. they kneel together on the floor while you watch from the couch, witness now to a sacred moment, trying not to move.

you’re only mildly alarmed that you still know satoru’s posture enough to know he is trying to consume as much of takara’s presence as he possibly can. he’s hunched the way he is when he eats, ingesting the sight of his son who he’s known less than an hour. and you have so much left to say to him but you are not so cruel as to rip from him this time, too.

takara is sharp, too. in between turning his wooden trains upside down and sideways in this strange, stilted performance, he asks satoru enough questions to make a running catalogue in his mind: where do you live? do you have a job? do you have parents? how long did it take to get here? and satoru’s smile, already fond, nearly takes you to an early grave.

at least, you think to yourself, you can at last put to bed your questioning: you are still in love with satoru. watching them acclimate to each other's company, for the first time in a long time, you remember what it is you gave up for takara’s sake. in taking takara from satoru you forsake him, yes, but you denied yourself these moments, too. and part of you dreads the conversations with gojo that are sure to follow, but the rest opens itself to the warmth of the two of them, splayed unceremoniously across your carpet.

still, you meant what you said before; you don’t regret your decisions. the world of jujutsu asks for takara now, and you find a small comfort in the fact that he knows, to some degree, what he would lose if he took up the post of his lineage.

takara’s eyes are sleepy as you glance at him now.

“bubba why don’t you say goodnight to satoru and i’ll come help you wash up in a few minutes?”

takara hesitates. “will i see him again?”

you refuse to look at gojo when he asks. “yes,” you assure him, “i promise you will.” you mean it in a way takara can feel. he drags himself away and down the hall, leaving you alone with…what would you call your relationship now?

satoru takes his time situating himself on the couch next to you. how strange it is to see him again, to be thrust into such devastating conflict, to miss him so strongly at an arm’s length. he’s more stunning than you’ve ever seen him, blindfold still off and unfurled on your coffee table.

“he’s amazing,” he breathes.

you can’t help the small smile that makes its way onto your face. “yeah, i know.”

satoru chews a moment on his question before he asks it. “did he ever ask about me?”

you deflate a little. “don’t do that.”

“don’t do what? don’t ask? don’t i deserve to know about my son?” his hands gesticulate ahead of him. you suppose the both of you are as angry at the other as you were earlier today, which is to say not very much, you think. mostly he is hurt—he cannot hide this from you—and you, somehow, are wounded, too, and you’re both floundering watching the other lick their blood dry. satoru continues, “don’t i deserve to know whether my son needed his father?”

“needed you? i assure you, satoru, i have been more than enough for him. i’ve given up the rest of my life in service of—”

“—that’s not what i meant—”

“isn’t it?” his eyes flit across your face, he’s looking for something and you’re unsure whether he’ll find it. “aren’t you asking me how often i’ve left a gap big enough for him to miss a man he never met? how often i failed?”

“no! i—no,” gojo reaches for you on instinct but leaves his palms hovering an inch from your forearms. “it’s obvious you’ve done an amazing job with him, especially given the circumstances, but—”

“and what circumstances would those be, exactly?” you ask with no small amount of cruelty. the funny thing is, you know exactly to which realities he is referring—your financial and familial solitude—but still it stings to feel questioned by this heir to a very real monetary fortune, beyond the immense power already bequeathed to him. “i may have wanted for things, gojo, but takara never has.”

bluer than anything human, satoru’s eyes look devastated, taken by gravity down his face. “don’t call me that.”

you purse your lips. “i just…” something vicious and sharp dissipates into the air, the both of you taking a breath, softly. “i’ve worked so hard to be proud of the way i have parented him.” satoru nods you on. “it’s not that i don’t want you in his life, i mean—i don’t think there was ever a moment when i didn’t want that at least a little bit. i can’t tell you how many times i wanted you to be there. but i feel…” you reach for him this time, resting a palm lightly on the back of his hand. “a little afraid, i guess,” you whisper.

satoru lets your admission flower in the silence a moment before he smiles, tiny and wry. “afraid of me?”

“yes,” you breathe. the white gleam of his hair bounces in the lamplight. “because everything is different.” you feel the steeled tension melt a little; you want to be honest with him, more than anything. “it feels a little bit like you’ve spoiled everything.”

satoru nods a little again, sober. “maybe i have.”

and your next confession will sound to satoru like a promise, you know it will, but it finds its way out anyway: “i can’t deny you him now, can i?”

“not without being terrible.”

you laugh something watery and real. “yeah, i guess not.”

a silence consumes you both again, but it’s no longer hostile, the both of you too exhaustedly malleable for anything more charged now.

in the soft sounds of your apartment you are given the space to notice that you have an urge to ask about satoru’s life now. you don’t think you are capable of philosophizing more on your choices and the unyielding consequences tonight, and he’s seen now—at the cost, maybe, of your sanity—what your life has been in your six years away. and you suspect it may hurt you somehow to know more concretely how he’s lived in your absence, but the day has been long. you are tired. you allow yourself this luxury.

“you said you…adopted two kids? is that right?”

“i—yeah,” satoru says, surprised in a gentle sort of way, “they were collateral from a mission that summer.”

you soften even further at the thought of satoru growing into guardianship at the same time you did. something catches in your lungs. “how old are they now?”

satoru smiles at the thought of them. “the little one, megumi—a pain, honestly, and so mean to me—will be ten this year. tsumiki is three years older. i sometimes forget it, though. she acts so much like a little adult,” he laughs softly.

“i’d like to meet them,” you admit.

“i want you to, too,” satoru says, almost too fondly. you preen a little in it anyway.

“do they live on campus with you?”

“no, no. i tried that at the beginning but it felt…i don’t know, inappropriate? i got an apartment as close by as i could, and i stay there as often as i can.”

you hum. “you seem…” you have to look for the right words, “suited to this.”

“are you surprised?” he scoffs, not unkindly.

“i don’t know, i guess so,” you admit with a grin. a little teasing. a time capsule.

“i’m very mature now,” satoru says back.

and because the only secret you could ever keep from satoru was ruined this afternoon, you confess: “the you i have in my head has been from when you were 18. all this time has passed and—” you tilt your head back and forth slightly, “—and you haven’t aged in my mind at all. not until today, all at once.”

satoru’s eyes on you warm your cheeks and you can’t bring yourself to feel embarrassed, not really for anything. “and?”

you narrow your eyes. “and what?”

“am i still as wonderful all grown up?”

the laugh that comes from you is real. “that’s yet to be determined, actually.”

“smart girl,” he says, you hope without thinking. the quiet asserts itself again.

all these years later, you find yourself still intimately familiar with the choices satoru makes in your company. when he moves, and how: all of it has been in his own image, a predictable force. you have never flinched when he has reached for you, in part because you are unafraid, but also because you have always seemed to know when he wanted to move his hands.

but you are rendered entirely still as you realize—your mind is a moment behind you—that satoru is holding you, now.

his arms are so warm you almost want to tear them from your body. instead—fool and terminally lovesick that you are—you press your forehead to the cradle of his neck and breathe the scent of him in. nothing has been settled tonight, not really, but neither of you move to acknowledge it, lest this sacrosanct handful of seconds be broken. you merely allow the bruising grip of his elbows around your biceps, the claw of your fingers around his sides, to hold.

tomorrow teases you from below the skyline. it’s only beginning to darken to evening but still you are confronted with the passing of time, with the reality of today.

though you remember, here in his grasp, one of the things you used to love so much about pressing up against a supernova like satoru; all other light fades, and the darkness, too, is gobbled up. time stops for a moment, you think, a withholding of breath as the sun stalls in its burial below the city. you allow yourself to forget temporarily about the fact that you have no idea what to do, of how to continue living on top of the remains of this life you crafted so carefully, and push your nose further into satoru’s shoulder. he whispers into your hair, so quiet you wonder if it isn’t meant for you: “i missed you.”

~~~~~~~

a/n: i feel SO eternally grateful as the taglist for this series continues to grow. i can't tell you all how much it means to me that you keep reading. i adore you <3 also, if you're interested in having a say on my chapter length in the future, vote in the poll i posted on sunday hehe. as always, let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

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andvys · 5 months ago

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The edges of your soul (I haven’t seen yet) ⭐︎ chapter three

⭐︎ You're the greatest thing we've lost

Warnings: angst, hurt/no comofort (I guess?), mentions of death, grief, grumpy/mean!Steve

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

Summary: Steve allows you to see a glimpse of who he really is, and not only do you get that, you also find out some sad truths.

Word count: 12.1k

Author's note: One of the chapters I was excited for the most was this one, you'll know why when you read it hehe. @hellfire--cult worked on this one with me, and she added a lot (don't listen to her when she will say she didn't, cause she did !) give her some love (or all of it cause she deserves it ♡)

⭐︎ series masterlist ⭐︎ previous chapter ⭐︎ next chapter

☀︎

Steam fogs the mirror in the bathroom, drops of water fall from your hair and down your shoulders, the smell of vanilla and lavender lingers in the room, you are rubbing moisturizer into your skin, enjoying the luxury of it all, a luxury you won’t have much longer the moment you are back on the road again. It’s impossible to find functioning showers nowadays, let alone hot running water. Something that used to be so normal, is something special now and you enjoy every second here in Hawkins, every hot shower, every good night’s sleep, every warm meal, the feeling of safety.

You put a pair of sweatpants on and a sweater to keep you warm, a pair of wool socks that Nancy knitted herself. You brush your wet hair and clip it back.

When you step out into the hallway, silence greets you. Eddie is in his room, he was complaining about a headache after you finished patrolling together after he worked on the RV all morning, you both got caught in the rain and after taking a shower to warm up, he excused himself to lie down. The door to Nancy’s bedroom is closed as well, she must be reading, she always closes the door when she does. The rainy weather allows you all to take everything a bit slower, to rest a little more than usual.

The wind howls outside, thunder striking somewhere far, red bolts of lightning curse through the sky, an image you still haven’t gotten used to.

You make your way down the stairs, it isn’t dark out yet but the grey clouds make it seem like it’s evening already, the golden light from the fireplace in the living room is very inviting in contrast to the darkness outside. You step inside and notice Steve moving around in the kitchen, taking out bowls from the cardboard. A towel is slung over his shoulder, his features are relaxed, no sign of a frown appearing on his face… yet.

You watch him for a moment, not moving away or towards him. You don’t want to disturb him or his peace. He seems to be content by himself and you know that facial expression will change the moment he notices you.

Things have been tense between you after your one and only time patrolling together. He didn’t ask you to join him in anything and you didn’t make the mistake of trailing after him again. You also didn’t make much more conversation with him and he seemed happy about it for he didn’t try either. The only interactions you both have are ‘good morning’ and ‘good night’, maybe a ‘can you pass me the salt’ or an ‘excuse me’ here and there but that’s all.

It’s been eleven days since your arrival here, and you both are still where you started. It saddens you. You tried to get to know him, and you still want to but he makes it hard to.

Maybe if things had been different, you would have gotten the chance to get to know the Steve you have seen in the pictures Nancy had shown you. The guy he once was seemed sweet and welcoming, the one before you is the opposite of it.

You know something must’ve happened to him. Maybe it’s got to do with the scars on his skin, maybe he lost someone you don’t know about, maybe it’s because of Robin but whatever it was that took away the light in his eyes has turned him into this – mistrusting and mean.

A silent sigh falls from your lips, you force your eyes away from his form and turn away, ready to make your way back up the stairs but his voice makes you halt in your tracks.

“Hey…”

A lump grows in your throat, a nervous feeling settles in your chest, you swallow and take a deep breath before you turn around, facing him again.

He is looking right at you, an awkward attempt at a smile pulling at his lips.

“Hi… I uh, Nancy and Eddie are in their rooms and I didn’t want to disrupt their peace but uh I also don’t want to disrupt yours so–”

“It’s fine,” he interrupts you, not even letting you finish your sentence. “Would you like to help me?”

You blink.

Did you hear him correctly?

He presses his palms against the counter, raising his eyebrows at you, like he waits for you to say yes.

Steve notices your uncertainty, the knit between your brows, the pursed lips, the confused look in your eyes. You are pulling at your sleeves, looking a little lost, looking a little intimidated. You are not like this with Nancy and Eddie, you are comfortable with them – but not with him, and he can’t blame you for that.

“I could use a hand.”

You nod slowly, licking your lips, “yeah, I uh, sure!”

You can’t help but feel a giddiness inside of you. He never asked you to join him before, he never asked for your help.

“What do you need me to do?” You ask as you make your way over to him, standing across from him now, on the other side of the kitchen island.

“Butter for now.”

“Butter?” You tilt your head.

He hates it when you do that, every time you ask a question, every time you are confused about something, you tilt your head to the side.

“We received a ton of milk, but we have to make our own butters and cream,” he explains as he gestures to the cans of milk on the table.

“Oh…”

“Wanna give me a hand? It’s a lot of stirring.”

You nod, following him to the small, round kitchen table.

“Here,” he murmurs, gesturing to the wooden jar, “this is a butter churn.”

“This is what they look like?”

Steve nods, “yeah, what’d you think they looked like?”

You shrug, picking up the stick, “I dunno, this thing looks like something straight out of the 1500s.”

Steve snorts, “maybe it is, we found it in Miss Keller’s house, she’s basically from the 1500s with the dresses she always wore.”

You fake a gasp, bringing your hand up to your mouth, “you stole Miss Keller’s butter churn? Bad Steve.”

He rolls his eyes at you and turns away, but you see the way his lips curl upwards, even if only a little. – A small victory on your part.

“So… how do I use this thing?”

He pours some milk into the jar and takes the stick from your hands, putting inside the jar before he covers the sides with a towel so the milk doesn’t splatter over you both.

“Here, you just… do these motions,” he explains, twisting the stick from side to side as he raises it up and down slowly, “you churn it slowly, you don’t want the milk to get all over you, it may take some time until you see some progress, you just gotta be patient.”

You hum, moving a little closer to him, invading his space, you smell his shampoo, his body wash, a hint of oranges and apricot, the sweet and soft scents surprise you, most men opt for masculine scents, strong and overpowering ones. You prefer this. You like this, you like this a little more than you should. You watch the way his hands move as he shows you the motions, you focus on his voice when he gives you the instructions and then you take over when he hands you the stick before he steps away from you rather quickly.

Unbeknownst to you, he too liked the scent that lingers on your skin a little too much. The sweetness of it, the softness of your hand when it touched his own, the closeness and the heat of your body – he doesn’t like you, how could he? His body reacts to your scent, feminine and soft. It’s been a long time since he felt the touch of a woman, and you are the first to graze his skin, that’s all. He wouldn’t think anything of it, he wouldn’t react to it had there been other women around.

To his surprise you stay quiet, focused on the task before you, you don’t speak or ask any questions for a while, it’s almost odd to him, you are talkative, never missing the opportunity to open your mouth and ramble about something completely random and unimportant. Then again, things have been tense between you both. He knows it’s his fault, he also knows that it’s for the better, yet he can’t help but dislike this silence right now, he doesn’t know why.

He tries to focus on his own task, pouring milk into a pot to make cream.

The crackle of the fire, and the sound from the butter churn fill the silence between you both. A few minutes pass before you finally speak up.

“What are we using the butter for?” You ask, feeling the soreness in your wrist already.

“For the meat. I use it to make it tender. The meats are not as good now that the cows are not properly cared for. They’re just cows from the wild and the few from the barn here.”

“Oh, so they don’t get all the needed supplements and stuff?”

“Exactly,” Steve nods, reaching for a spatula, he starts stirring the milk, “I mean, we do our best but you know…”

You look over at him, surprised to find him looking back at you already, you didn’t realize his eyes were on you. You nod your head slowly, not moving your eyes away from his, you don’t break the contact just yet, looking into his hazel eyes that are always blazing with anger or annoyance, right now it’s neither of those emotions, it’s something else, something you can’t read, something you can’t make out, something you haven’t seen in his eyes yet, a look yet to be unlocked.

He blinks, shaking his head, he furrows his eyebrows and looks down at your hand, “how does it look?”

You breathe out and force your eyes away from his as well, you stop your movements and lift the towel off the jar, “uh, I think it’s solid now.”

“Great, now pour it into the bowl,” he gestures to the bowl with the cheesecloth inside.

You fall quiet again and follow his instructions, his voice fills the space between you as he gives you a step by step on what to do but when you’re as good as done, the silence between you is almost deafening, almost awkward, especially to him, the need to fill it is so strong.

He swore to himself that he wouldn’t talk to you if not necessary, that he wouldn’t ask questions. He doesn’t want to know anything about you, he doesn’t need that in his life, but this moment right now is killing him. He is done cooking the cream, and he is now working on making dinner, cutting vegetables. He tries to distract himself with that but to no avail.

He glances at you. It’s dark out now, the only source of light coming from the fireplace and all the candles set up because he likes to save up on electricity by keeping the lights off. The golden light touches your skin so softly, your hair shining from it, the smell of your body wash lingers in the room. You look relaxed, you look content despite being here with him. The sweater you are wearing is too big and it slipped down your shoulder from all the movements, exposing the scar that has formed on your shoulder. It was fresh when you came here, and he never found out how you got it.

He clears his throat, swallowing the lump that grew from nervousness, he speaks your name, which it’s almost foreign on his tongue.

You look up at him, “yeah..?”

“What uh,” he pauses, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly before he points to your shoulder, “what happened?”

You need a moment to follow what he is pointing at. You are surprised, almost taken aback to hear a question coming from him, a question directed at you. Slowly, you look down, only now noticing that your sweater slipped. You put down the paddle that you used to form the butter and pull your sweater back up.

“Uh… I fell onto broken glass when a sick person snuck up on me.” You explain, scrunching your nose, “I was distracted, I never am usually but I was hungry and looking for food and I found something I’ve been looking for, for months!”

“Oh,” Steve mumbles and looks down. “What was it?”

“...Kit Kat’s.”

Steve raises his eyebrows at you, lip curling up a bit, “you almost got yourself killed because of Kit Kat’s?”

You shrug at him, “they’ve always been my favorite! And I haven’t had any since the day the world went to shit!”

He chuckles a bit but he doesn’t comment on it further, just looking back down, giving you the opportunity to look at him closer, at the scar around his neck, you never asked how he got it, you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

He looks up to find you staring at his neck. He knows you are curious, you have been from the start, he always caught you staring at it.

“I was dragged by a demo– a bat.”

He sees the way your eyes widen, how surprised you are by his explanation, “huh?”

He points to his neck, “it choked me, leaving a mark, while two others bit my flesh off.”

Steve used to cringe every moment he spent thinking of that night, of when they dragged him across the floor, leaving marks on his skin. He used to have nightmares of it, until those nightmares were replaced by new pictures, worse ones.

You nod slowly, looking him up and down, there are no other visible marks for you to see, except for the one on his neck.

“Where?”

He sighs, not wanting to look into your eyes, not wanting to see the sadness flashing in them. He looks back down at the carrot he was cutting, picking the knife back up again, he continues.

“My abdomen, my sides… but Eddie had it worse.”

You quickly realize what he is doing, steering the topic away from him again, thinking he doesn’t deserve sympathy for what he went through.

You have seen the scars on Eddie’s skin, the deep and gnarly marks, he briefly told you what had happened but you never pushed the subject, you never tried to find out more.

“You mean the scar on his lip…?”

Steve nods, “his chest, abdomen, arms, legs… They’re all scarred. They bit off chunks of flesh.” He says, his voice sad, almost haunted.

Your shoulders drop, the look on your face too, sadness flushes through you and you look down at the table, at nothing in particular.

You can’t imagine how it happened, the pain he was in, the fear that took home in all of them when Eddie was bleeding out and fighting for his life.

Steve turns around when he registers your silence. He sees the worried, sad look on your face, how your lips curl downwards and your shoulders are dropped.

“But we’re okay now, he is healthy as you can see… and annoying.”

At that, you smile a little, lifting your head back up to look at him, “yeah, but he’s adorable.”

Steve draws back a little, raising an eyebrow at you, “you crushing on Munson or something?”

Your eyes widen and you flush all over, shaking your head quickly that your hair falls out of your clip.

“What, no! Ew! He reminds me of my brother! People that are just like my brother ain’t my type!” You scoff, shuddering a little. You pick up the paddle again and continue forming the butter into the shape you want to have it.

Steve can’t help but smile, amused by the look on your face. He gets a little curious though.

“... And what is your type?”

You hum, taking a moment to answer his question.

He doesn’t look away from you just yet, he watches you.

“Mmm… As long as he makes me smile when I need it the most… that’s all I need.”

Steve nods at your words, humming.

You look up at him, surprised to see him still watching you.

“What about you? What’s your type, cowboy?”

He flushes a little, cheeks warming under your eyes. He hasn’t talked about women in years, and hasn't thought about this either.

He shakes his head, lifting his shoulders up and down, “I uh… I honestly have no idea.”

He is not the guy he used to be, the one who was flirting freely and taking out one girl after the other – even that guy didn’t know his type. He was searching for something in every girl, and he never found it.

“Oh come on!” You scoff, looking at him in disbelief, “what type of women did you go out with?”

He shrugs, “I don’t know, they were always… stereotypical girls that always talked about the latest trends and stuff.”

You snort, rolling your eyes as you look down.

“Ah right… Prom King. I can guess which type of women you’re into–”

He quickly shakes his head at you, “no… no… I went out with them to have fun, it was just physical. Those girls weren’t my type.”

You frown at his words and sigh.

For some reason your reaction makes him think that you’re done with this conversation, but then you look back up and turn towards him completely.

“Okay… then, when you’re with a woman, what is attractive to you?”

“... Real answer?”

“Sure…” You murmur.

A smirk tugs at his lip when he notices how flustered you are getting when his eyes move up and down.

You notice how he stops at your chest in particular and you can’t help but groan and shake your head in disappointment.

“Booo…”

“No!” Steve raises his hands up in surrender, chuckling.

“I was gonna say eyes.”

You roll your eyes, snorting, “right… I didn’t mean physically, Steve. I meant what is attractive to you when you’re on a date with them? What do they do that is attractive to you?”

Your words wipe the small smile off his face again, and he stands there in silence, getting lost in his thoughts, getting lost in the past, reliving every date, every moment that should have excited him but didn’t. He realizes that there was not a single date that is worth remembering, not a single girl who made him smile genuinely. Sure, he had fun the moment he was in pleasure but that’s all, the girls were attractive physically but emotionally? They all sucked, none of them cared about him, all they wanted was a piece of King Steve.

And even when he thought he found something genuine, someone to love him, someone to care for him, it turned out to be a show, it was just as genuine as the interest all those girls had in him. It was all a lie.

There is no love in him for her anymore, no feelings, no desires, nothing. But those words still hurt and sometimes they still haunt him because he believes it. Those words echo in his head, just like all the other hateful things others have thrown at him. But one in particular remains,

‘Bullshit’

“I… I don’t know…” He whispers, letting his facade fall for only a moment. “I guess someone who doesn’t see me as a failure.”

You are taken aback by his words, a weird feeling settling in your chest at the confession.

When Steve realizes what he said, when he notices the look in your face, when he notices his mistake, he immediately draws back.

“W-What… Failure, why?”

He shakes his head, turning his back to you again, “doesn’t matter, um… the butter should be done, wanna give me a hand cutting the potatoes?”

You hesitate, staring at the back of his head. You want to know more, you want to know why he said that, you want to know why he feels like this, who made him feel like this.

A sigh falls from your lips, loud enough for him to hear.

“Sure…”

You leave it alone, not wanting to risk getting on his bad side again, you bite your tongue and do as he asked. You clean up the kitchen table before you walk over to him, getting your own cutting board, and you start peeling the potatoes.

You work in silence for a while, just like before, but this one isn’t as uncomfortable, even though his words still echo in your head and you wonder about his past. You don’t want him to close up on you again, not when he just started to open up, so you don’t press the subject further.

It’s too silent though and you can barely handle it. You let go of the peeler before you started peeling the potatoes, taking Steve aback, his eyes already glaring at you as you turned and walked away.

“Really? You don’t want to peel potatoes?”

“It’s too quiet!” You leave the kitchen, leaving Steve stunned as he looks back at the door. It was quiet but he didn’t think you were going to have a breakdown because of it. He doesn’t know you and that is being a little obvious by now. Maybe you don’t do good with silence and he just doesn't know that side of you. If he knew, maybe he could have talked about something else, or try.

But not two seconds later, he starts hearing the radio turning and then static. He doesn’t remember when was the last time they turned on that radio. He can hear you changing the channels of it, the static growing and lowering, and he wonders if you're crazy. There is no music being played. Who would operate a radio station in the middle of the apocalypse–

His eyes widen when he starts hearing ‘Hound dog’ by Elvis Presley. It is static, yet it is still there. There is music. Somewhere in Indiana, someone is operating a radio station. Someone is trying to keep people in a good mood despite it all. He never knew. Nancy never knew. Eddie never tried. The three of them thought that the only music they could have was Eddie’s guitar.

He hears you humming to it, walking back into the kitchen and placing the small radio on the far corner so you two can have the music to yourselves. He is still staring at the radio, completely stunned, his eyes wide. You turn to look at him when you grab the peeler, noticing the look of surprise.

“Why do you look so stunned?”

“I– I didn’t know they played music…” Your eyes went to look at it and you smiled, nodding at him.

“Yeah, I had one back at camp too… Did you know radio signals can travel from 50 to 60 miles away? Some AM stations up to 100 miles!” He is still surprised there is music, yet you are talking away facts to him about radio signals. But that actually caught his attention. There are others, not an hour away from him. It has to be the WSQK watts station. It has to be.

“There’s… a radio station near… like thirty or forty minutes away from here…” You turn to him, surprised as well now.

“Really? Well… there’s people operating there… Probably also sending out news and messages to people.” Your attention turns back to the potatoes, starting to peel away, leaving the peeled skin scraps in a mountain on the counter.

“That’s… good to know.” It actually is good to know. They thought that the only radio signal they could ever get for news was Mr. Clarke’s transmitter that is in the library. That’s how they got contacted by Hopper when the others arrived in California, and now he is finding out that maybe some radio stations are still transmitting. They are probably using some kind of solar panel to make energy because–

“This potato has a worm.” He snaps out of his thoughts immediately at your words, frowning as he looks down at it.

“There’s no worm there.” You slowly look up at him with a cheeky smile, only to look back down, leaving that peeled potato aside to grab another.

“You were thinking too much. Just enjoy the music, you can think later.” You reply and he blinks for a few seconds as the song keeps playing. He looks back down to his carrots, grabbing the knife he left on the side to keep cutting. The minutes pass, the songs changing, songs he knows. Songs that remind him of when the world didn’t simply go to shit.

And there’s some kind of comfort in that.

“Did you know Marvin Gaye was shot by his own father?” You have been spitting facts and news to him that he either knew or never knew, and he didn’t notice he found himself talking back at you, even giving a fact or two of his own.

“I did, that was crazy as shit.” The song ‘Sexual Feeling’ was playing, that’s why you started talking about that with him. Each song that passed, you said something about it. You were stirring the vegetables in the boiling water while he sauted the meat in the pan, with the butter you made. He threw some rosemary in it too, for extra flavour.

One other thing he didn’t notice was that he had been humming along all this time.

He had two pans where he was cooking four pieces of meat, while you worked on making sure the vegetables were properly boiled. You had added some garlic in the pot because you claimed it’s good for the overall health. He almost chuckled at that because it was just because garlic is delicious. There was no need to put garlic on boiled vegetables.

You two didn’t even notice that even in the silence of conversation, where just the music played, there was no more awkwardness. There was no tension. There was nothing that could make you think he didn’t like you anymore.

“Is that Marvin Gaye?” The sound of Nancy’s voice makes the two of you turn around, and she is surprised to see you working together. It’s been days since you two last had a proper conversation, and– “Wait… music?”

“Yeah. She kind of discovered it. Nance, we didn’t know the radio station was still functioning, for a whole year.” Steve’s voice makes you feel proud, knowing you helped and that he was actually surprised by your discovery. Nancy blinks a few times, not believing her ears.

“Wait, so it means we can use that to receive news…” Steve’s eyebrows meet in the middle for a second, only to then nod slightly.

“I bet they’re not different from the news we get from the transmitter in the library, Nance.” His head turns back to the meat, while you grab four plates, stacking them next to him. “Thanks.”

You try to tone down your giddiness, not wanting to show him you are really happy he is being civil and friendly with you, “No problem.”

Nancy’s eyes travel back and forth with the two of you, wondering what had changed, but it is better not to ask. Seeing Steve putting steak on each plate while you grab a colander from the cupboards below the sink. You are about to grab the pot yourself, grabbing kitchen clothes to not burn yourself on the handles, but Steve grabs them from you.

“Let me.” You see how he grabs the pot, not letting you do it, not letting you carry the heavy weight yourself.

“Um–” You don’t know how to react or say, kind of confused at his action, but you don’t dislike how much of a gentleman that move was. Nancy hums a bit to herself, clearing her throat before yelling out.

“Eddie! Food’s ready!” Your head turns to look at her, and you snap from your thoughts, not noticing you had been looking at his arms as they strained a bit when pouring the water into the colander. You quickly move to the cupboards to start setting up the table with Nancy as Eddie walks down the stairs.

“Oh, shit, we eating Steve’s delicious steaks?” Steve rolls his eyes but he’s proud of his cooking. It’s one of those things he knew he was good at, and he never received any complaints.

“Just set the table up, Munson.” He replies and Eddie immediately moves to grab the water out of the fridge and set it on the table. You go back to the counter, next to Steve, and grab a big scooping spoon. Steve hands you one plate, with a steak on it, and you just add some boiled vegetables on it before placing it in front of Nancy as she sits down.

Once you are all seated, Eddie doesn’t even wait a second before he shoves a piece of meat into his mouth, moaning as if he’s in a porn movie, making the other three of you cringe.

“Do you have to do that everytime you eat his steak?” Nancy asks as she cuts herself a little piece, Eddie turning to look at her, with his mouth full.

“Its’ ‘fee biss’ stek’ i’ve evur’ haf.” You snort into your water at the nonsense he just mumbled because of his mouth full of food. Steve holds in a chuckle as he grimaces in disgust.

“Can you chew and swallow before you talk?” And Eddie glares at him only for his eyes to widen up as he looks around, a frown in his eyebrows. He chews quickly, swallowing where he almost choked.

“Is that– ‘Take on me’? Is that fucking music!?” Nancy snorts as you all realize that Eddie hadn’t even noticed the music playing because he was more focused on Steve’s steaks.

You explain that you have found a few channels over the months every time you come across a radio somewhere, though none of them have played metal music.

“Maybe you gotta do the heavy metal channel,” you shrug.

“Huh, you know what? Maybe I will, once I figure out how to, I fucking will,” he nods happily before he takes another bite of his steak.

Steve chuckles a little to himself, though he keeps his eyes trained on the plate before him. Nancy and Eddie share a look of surprise, it’s been a while since they saw him so… relaxed.

For the first time in a while, he joins in on the small talk during dinner, commenting and nodding along to the things you talk about. A sparkle of hope is inside of both Nancy and Eddie, hope that maybe there is still something left in him wanting to try, wanting to live, wanting to fight for something better.

Maybe he is ready to leave now, maybe he is learning how to let go.

Eddie wastes no time in wanting to find out, because the moment you are all done eating and he pushes the empty plate away from him, leaning back, he stuffs his hand into the pocket of his jeans, fishing something out.

You all watch curiously.

Eddie flashes you a smile when you lean closer, trying to peek over the table. He lifts his arm up and throws something over to Steve, the unmistakable sound of jingling keys passing by you, a flash over silver before your eyes before it lands in Steve’s hand.

Steve looks down, feeling the metal in his palm, his fingers are closed around it. He doesn’t need to look to know what it is, the happiness in Eddie’s eyes and the dreadful feeling in his stomach tells him exactly what it is.

With furrowed eyebrows, he stares at nothing in particular.

“What is it!?” Nancy asks, impatiently.

Eddie looks at the both of you, unable to contain the smile on his face as he starts jumping up and down on his chair.

“I finished it,” he explains proudly, though neither of you understand what he means by that as you both give him questioning looks, to which he sighs. “The RV! It’s up and running! We can finally get out of here!”

“Seriously?” Nancy nearly squeals, her eyes lighting up at his words, she nearly jumps from her chair, almost knocking it over.

You know that she’s been waiting for this, waiting to be reunited with her family again.

“Yeah! We’re going to California, baby!” Eddie exclaims, reaching for her hand and giving it a squeeze. “So you better start packing your bags.”

You smile, sharing their relief as well. You've been waiting for it too, waiting to finally see your family again, though in this moment, you fear looking over at Steve, knowing how he feels about leaving Hawkins. You still turn your head, daring to take a glance and you find exactly what you thought you would.

His features are no longer relaxed, his lips are no longer curled into a smile, his eyes aren’t soft like they were before. A mixture of sadness and anger lingers in them, and when he looks at you, meeting your eyes, you feel a shudder running down your spine, he no longer is the one from before, the one that laughed with you, the one that talked with you like you were his… friend.

He clenches his jaw and he turns away again, throwing the keys back to Eddie who catches them with one hand, the smile falling from his lips when he finally notices the frown on Steve’s face.

You all flinch a little when the chair scrapes against the hardwood floor and the brunette picks his plate up angrily before walking over to the kitchen.

Nancy’s smile falls and her shoulders slump, helplessly she looks at Eddie.

“Dude, you know we can’t stay here,” Eddie states carefully, with a soft and gentle voice. “We’re gonna run out of everything someday, you can’t prevent–”

“We won’t run out if we go hunting,” Steve grumbles.

“There’s nothing left here for us, man. We got people waiting for us–”

Suddenly, Steve turns around, with his eyes angrier than before and his cheeks burning red, “you got people waiting for you! Leave me out of this!”

Nancy frowns in disbelief, as well as Eddie who gets up from his chair as well, throwing the keys on the dining table.

“Seriously? You’re telling me that the kids aren’t waiting for you? That they haven’t been asking for you every time Dustin radio’d us and you’ve been acting like a complete asshole, refusing to speak to him – to them?”

Steve scoffs loudly, turning back around, he makes his way over to the sink.

“We’re not leaving without you, Steve,” Nancy speaks. “I’m not leaving you behind.”

“That’s rich coming from you, Nance.”

She falls silent after that, opening her mouth and closing it again, she looks a little taken aback, guilt flashes in her eyes.

Eddie only sighs, looking down with a defeated look on his face.

You don’t know what his words mean, you don’t know why she gives up after that. Many questions run through your head but you mostly wonder what he meant by that.

“Steve,” Eddie tries again and you can hear the desperation in his voice, you can see the sadness in his face, he doesn’t want to leave his friend behind but he doesn’t want to stay here either, he never wanted to, least of all now. “There is nothing left for us here, there is nothing left for you here, you know that, man. Robin is–”

You flinch again when he throws the plate into the sink, so hard it must’ve splattered in half. He turns around, throwing a finger at Eddie, “I told you I’m not leaving! If you wanna go, feel free to get the fuck out of here, all of you! But leave me alone!” He yells, glaring at the both of them before he storms out of the room, passing by you and out into the hallway, not bothering to grab a jacket or an umbrella before he rips open the door and leaves the house, slamming the door so harshly that you wonder if it’s still in tact or not.

Your heart is pounding in your chest, adrenaline kicking in when you notice that Eddie and Nancy aren’t moving, not planning to follow him out.

They know him better than you do, they know not to touch him now, he won’t listen, he won’t compromise, he will do more damage than anything else at this moment but you don’t know that.

Worry settles deep in your gut, the urge to go after him growing stronger each passing second. You get up and push the chair back, leaving them no time to react before you rush out of the room, quickly throwing on your old pair of sneakers, not wasting any more time to follow him out.

You hear your name being called before you slam the door shut, but you don’t bother to turn back around, you run straight into the storm, not caring about the rain you ran from earlier.

You rip open the gate and close it behind you, looking around you as you try to spot him in the darkness, you squint your eyes when lightning strikes through the sky. You see his silhouette, three houses down the road.

The rain runs down your face, soaking through your clothes already, the coldness of it clinging to your skin and making you shiver already, even as you start running after him, following him wherever he is going. You pick up the pace when he gets further and further away from you.

Worry still gnawing at you, not knowing how he will react to you following him but you can’t just let him go like this, you know that he is angry but you also know that the anger is a mask for something else. He is sad, he is broken because of things that happened to him. You may not be the person he wants him to follow, but you just can’t let him go like this.

You slow down when he rounds the corner of a house, disappearing behind the wall. The rain paddles harshly against the floor, thunder crashing through the sky. You almost slip on the muddy ground when you step into the grass, you halt in your tracks when you notice the surrounding bushes, somehow still full and alive, unlike most other things in Hawkins.

You lost him after he disappeared into the garden of whoever lives or lived in this house. The white picket fence has no gate, and you can just walk through it. You follow the footprints in the mud, feeling grateful for the lightning for once. You push your wet hair out of your face, as you inch closer and closer to where he ran off to.

You take deep breaths, trying not to shiver from the cold. Thunder makes you flinch again, though the loud crash is not what makes you halt in your tracks, nor is it the red lightning bolts in the sky that illuminate your surroundings, allowing you to see better, allowing you to take in the view before you.

For a moment, you stop breathing, you stop moving completely, you are sure that even your heart stopped beating. You can only raise your hand to your lips as your eyes widen in horror.

He is here, he is standing in this garden, only a few steps away from you. He is standing there with his head hung low, looking down at the grave before him, wilted flowers on it, a necklace dangling from the cross, a necklace that once dangled from her neck.

Robin Buckley.

The name engraved into the wooden cross, is the name you have heard so many times, the name of his best friend.

So many feelings run through your veins but mostly shock and confusion. He talked about her like she was alive, they talked about her like she was alive, there was no sign of this. You could have never guessed. Every time he left the house saying that he was gonna visit Robin, you thought he was actually seeing her, you could have never imagined that he meant visiting her grave.

Your heart breaks when the realization of it all begins to sink in, why he is the way that he is, why he doesn’t want to leave, why he is so filled with anger and rage.

You swallow the sickening lump in your throat. You don’t know what to say or do, a part of you wants to walk away and leave him be, the other wants to comfort him, and the stronger part wins.

“Steve…” You call out softly to him, your voice reaching him despite the raging storm.

He tenses up, you can see it, it takes him a moment but when he finally turns around, you realize what a mistake it was to follow him. Even through the darkness and the rain, you can see the glistening tears in his eyes, the angry ones, the scowl on his face directed at no one but you.

“I-I’m sorry…”

“Don’t!” He snaps loudly. “Don’t say anything right now!”

You press your lips together, taking deep breaths as you look at the intense emotions in his eyes, and his anger makes you cower away. Shivers run down your spine, not from the rain, but from how he looks at you.

You shake your head slowly, digging your nails into your palms. You don’t know what to do, so you just stand there and watch him. Behind the hatred in his eyes, you see pain and sadness, you see how hard he is holding onto this, you see how it is driving him crazy, how it’s ripping him apart.

“I-I didn’t know…” You say softly.

Steve can hear the sadness in your voice, the gentle tone in it, the warmth in your eyes – he can’t stand it, he doesn’t want it, he doesn’t deserve it.

“That she’s dead? You didn’t know that my best friend is dead?” Steve scoffs as he slowly starts to make his way over to you, inching closer carefully, staring at you like you are his prey that he is ready to rip apart, right here, right now. “Well, now you fucking do, she’s dead, Robin is dead just like most people are, just like you will be the moment you step out there!” He throws his hand up, pointing at nothing in particular. His voice is trembling, the rain streams down his face.

You wince at his words.

You know what’s waiting out there, you know the dangers of this world but that doesn’t stop you from finding your family, from keeping hope alive.

You understand him now, more than anything. You don’t know how you would be if you lost someone you loved so dearly but he still has people he loves, people that love him.

“I’m sorry, Steve. I really am, I’m sorry that you lost her,” you start, your own voice trembling, out of nerves and out of fear. “But she is gone, a-and you staying here won’t change it! It won’t bring her back, it won’t fix anything! I understand your pain, I really do… but– you have people who care for you, Eddie and Nancy. You have other people who are waiting for you… Dustin?” You say despite the shock that still curses through you.

You don’t know whether it’s tears running down his cheeks or if it’s just the rain, but his eyes are glassy.

“Don’t bring Henderson into this! He is alive and well and that suffices!”

“Does it really?” You ask, tilting your head to the side. “Because you look miserable most of the time, and you will end up all alone once Eddie and Nancy are gone!”

Steve takes another step closer to you, looking down at you with nothing but hatred in his eyes.

“I know you feel like your life is over but it’s not, I–”

“You’ve known me for two weeks. Two fucking weeks. I don’t care about your optimistic hopeful bullshit. When you find your parents and your brother dead, you will wish you never had it to begin with.”

You draw back, straightening your back, you stare at him, speechless and stunned. The words are caught in your throat, your chest aching more than ever.

You know he is hurt and angry, and now he is trying to hurt you back. You know that they’re alive, you know that your parents are fine, you know that your brother is well.

“They’re… they’re not–”

“You saw the world out there, open your eyes for just a second!” He snaps at you, getting closer and closer, allowing you to see him and his anger better. “You are leading my friends to their death! You are helping them leave! I-I thought you would want to stay once you realized you were safe here, that you’re all fucking safe!”

You shake your head at him, growing angry too for the things he said about your family.

“Why wouldn’t I want to leave!?”

“Cause you are literally driving into hell! There are things you haven’t encountered there!”

“I want to see my family! Nancy and Eddie too! You have family waiting for you!”

A humorless laugh falls from his lips, he brings his hand up to his face, pressing his knuckle under his nose as he closes his eyes for a moment before he opens them again, looking at you again, “family? My family is here, six feet under!” He yells, pointing at the grave. He is blinded by rage and sadness. “The one person I had in my life that cared for me like no one else had is gone! And I’m not leaving her here!”

You know there is no getting through to him, not when he is like this.

Steve would rather chase after a ghost for the rest of his life.

“Leave her here?” You whisper. “She’s not here anymore, Steve! Do you really think she would want this for you? She wouldn’t! You were family, you were her best friend, she would want you to leave, to find a better place, to live!”

If the look in his eyes could kill, you’d be buried under this ground right now. You can see that it’s getting worse, that his eyes are burning, that his chest is heaving.

“I know what danger is out there, but I need my family–”

“Smell the fucking non-existent sunflowers, they’re dead by now!”

Steve tries it again, to hurt you, to harm you where he knows it hurts the most but you shake your head, trying not to let his words get to you, trying not to let his words touch your heart. You take a step away from him, shaking your head.

“No–, no they’re not,” you whisper, feeling the familiar lump in your throat, the painful throbbing in your heart, the hotness in your eyes.

He scoffs at you, looking you up and down in disbelief, “you think you’re going to find your house surrounded by a gate of protection? You’re fucking delusional if you think so.”

You wrap your arms around yourself, taking a step back further. You hesitate, feeling intimidated by his presence all the sudden but he only follows, looking right into your glassy eyes.

He is guided by hatred. He can no longer see clearly, the pain has turned him into this, the pain has made him cold. He doesn’t care about the tears in your eyes, about the trembling in your bottom lip, about the fear and the sadness in your eyes.

“My family is alive, I-I know they are–”

“Smell the decay of the corpses around you, and tone down that hope of yours before you end up even more hurt than you thought you could ever be. Open your eyes for once and stop acting like an immature little girl.”

His words feel like a blow to your chest, stealing the breath from you and replacing it with pain. The colors vanish before your eyes, a darkness you never allowed to enter, blurring your vision and crawling into your veins, threatening to take over.

The tears no longer stay in your eyes, they start falling freely as your bottom lip trembles, a sob threatening to escape you though you push it back down, not wanting him to see just how much his words have hurt you.

You see nothing in his eyes, no remorse, no guilt, nothing but this – grief has turned him cold.

Your sniffle breaks his anger a little though, the blaring redness that flashed in his eyes just seconds ago, dimming just a bit when he begins to see the damage he has done. He sees the way your chest is rising up and down heavily, the way you're blinking quickly like it would stop your tears from falling, he sees the pain in your eyes that he had caused.

You are crying, he made you cry when he once swore to himself to never do this to anyone ever again.

“You’re…” Your voice breaks and you wipe your tears, as though it would change anything. “You’re a douchebag.”

The tension in his shoulders leaves him, and regret starts sinking in.

Robin thought that of him before she got to know him, before she became his friend. He changed, even more so when he found her.

Has her death made him turn back around?

Has it changed him this much?

She would be disappointed, she would kick his ass for what he did just now, for what he said, for how he made you feel, for making you cry when all you wanted was to help. He knew where it would hurt the most and he chose to hit you there exactly, not caring about what it would do to you.

You tear your eyes away from him, sniffling quietly as you walk away from him, leaving him in the rain.

His fingers itch, his hand moves forward as though to stop you but he quickly clenches his fist and breaks his eyes away from you, looking down at the muddy ground. He closes his eyes, shutting them tightly as he holds back tears. His heart is aching more than ever.

He knows you’re right, deep down he knows.

He knows it’s only fair for Eddie and Nancy to leave, he knows it all, he understands it all.

He knows that she would want him to go with them, that she would force him to if she could. He knows she’s gone, he hasn’t felt her presence since the day a bird had sat down on her cross, she is gone and there is no bringing her back, not even if he stays.

But how can he leave when all that is left of her is this?

Everywhere he turns there’s a reminder that she was here, every good memory he has of her would be abandoned and he can’t do it, he just can’t.

With trembling lips and tears now streaming down his cold cheeks, he turns back around, looking at her name on the cross, at the reminder… that she is gone, forever. His knees almost buckle, a sob threatens to rip from his lips but he doesn’t let it, he doesn’t allow himself to break down, even as the sadness and the guilt begins to consume him.

“Robin,” he whispers, shakily. He knows he won’t get an answer, he knows he won’t get the sign that he’s been begging for, he knows he won’t hear her voice calling back to him, the only thing he hears is the rain, the rustling trees and his own heartbeat. He tastes the saltiness of his tears, he tastes the bitterness. “Birdie…”

She is gone and she’s not coming back.

He lost her, and soon he will lose more.

Soon his biggest fear will catch up to him.

Being left behind, being all alone.

It was bound to happen.

Right?

Steve didn’t come out of his room all day.

You haven’t seen him, haven’t heard from him, haven’t heard his voice in the hallway or anywhere else.

He came home shortly after you the night before, you heard him talking to Nancy, heard her asking questions that he didn’t answer. You know she told him that you’re leaving today, told him to pack his bags and be ready by night. It’s getting dark out now, your bags are in the RV, as well as Nancy’s and Eddie’s, along with a box of pictures and other things that they refuse to leave behind.

You are all ready to go, all except for him.

Eddie is giddy, excited to finally hit the road, though you can also see his jumpiness, how he can’t seem to sit still, the anxiety of having to leave Steve behind is eating at him.

Nancy is distracting herself, sitting at the dining table, her guns and knives sprawled across the table, a cloth in her hand as she cleans her weapons.

You’re sitting by the window, looking into blank space. Sadness lingered in you all day, and it didn’t change throughout it. He planted thoughts into your head that you refused to think about or even consider, though now a part of you can’t help but feel anxious because what if… what if there is some truth to it? What if you are being a little too hopeful? What if you are being ignorant and foolish?

You know he was hurt, and that hurt has triggered the anger, anger that he directed at you – he wanted to hurt someone and you were there, the perfect target, you are the reason why his friends are leaving now.

You didn’t mention what you found out last night, not to Eddie nor Nancy. It only really sunk in this morning, when you woke up with a headache after crying yourself to sleep.

You don’t know how he lost her but something tells you that she didn’t go peacefully. He blames himself, you saw it in his eyes.

“We should go soon.” It’s Nancy who breaks the silence in the room, a determined look on her face. You can sense her hesitation, her nervousness. She doesn’t want to go without him, you saw the way her eyes kept flicking to the staircase waiting for him to come walking down the stairs with bags in his hands, he never did. She told him to be ready by 7pm, it’s 8 now.

Eddie told you that Steve said goodbye, that he hugged him and Nancy, and prepared food and snacks for the road. No matter how much they begged and tried to convince him to come with them, it was to no avail. He never planned on leaving, not then, not now.

A part of you wants to try, to go up to his room and talk to him again but you doubt he wants to see you, especially after last night. He hates you, you saw it in his eyes. He won’t change his mind, not for you. He hurt you, but you still don’t want him to stay here, to be alone, to be left behind.

Eddie stops pacing around, he watches Nancy as she gets up from her seat, putting the guns and knives away into her backpack.

“Nance,” Eddie hesitates, looking at her in uncertainty.

She throws her backpack over her shoulder and shrugs at him, trying to look tough, trying to mask the worry on her face.

“He made his choice, he wants to stay. I won’t force him to come with us.” That is all she says before she leaves the room, taking you by surprise with her sudden coldness. She walks out of the house without another word.

Eddie glances at you, taking in the frown on your face, the sadness behind your puffy eyes. He knows that something happened between you and Steve when you followed him out into the rain, last night. He suspects that he threw unkind words at you – you didn’t tell him anything, neither did Steve but Eddie knows it crashed between you.

Now all he sees is hesitation in your eyes, despite the hurt written across your face. He can tell you don’t want to leave him behind. Eddie noticed that you had developed some kind of attachment to Steve, despite his constant cold shoulder.

You keep your eyes trained on the ground, blinking rapidly as you get up, not moving away from the window just yet though.

Eddie sighs, he walks over to the desk by the window, opening one of the drawers, he picks out a map he kept hidden, a copy of the one already in the RV. It’s marked up just like the other one, the town in California circled in a red color. He carries it over to the dining table, “in case he changes his mind,” he tells you.

You furrow your eyebrows as you look between him and the map, “I thought you didn’t have a copy?”

He makes his way over to you, a small smile grazing his lips, he places his palm on your shoulder, “guess I lied a little.” His brown eyes are sad, not matching the smile at all. He squeezes you, nodding softly before he steps away, looking around one more time, even though he’s done it a few times already today. “I’ll be outside.”

“Yeah…”

He closes the door behind him, leaving you by yourself.

You can’t say that you’re surprised by their sudden decision to leave today, but then again, they have been waiting for this moment for a long time. They’ve been waiting for it for a year, waiting for him to be ready. He never will be.

You take a deep breath as you look around the house you found shelter in, found new friends in. You wouldn’t have been here if you didn’t follow him that day. You tug your jacket closer to your body, gripping it tightly.

You don’t want to leave without him.

But you are the last person to change his mind.

You have known him for a few days only and yet he managed to crawl under your skin. You got used to him, despite his rough demeanor, despite yesterday.

You make your way upstairs, you can’t leave without saying goodbye.

But when you knock on his door, he doesn’t respond or open the door – not that you expected him to. You lean against the door frame, keeping your knuckle against the wooden door.

“Steve?” You whisper shakily, hoping to hear his voice. “I uh… I just wanted to thank you, for letting me stay, I know you didn’t want to but still… thank you.”

You hear nothing on the other side, no shuffling, no footsteps, no sighs, nothing.

A sigh falls from your lips, the sadness in you spreading further.

“Despite everything, it was nice meeting you… Goodbye Steve.”

You finally pull away from the wood, looking at the door one last moment before you head back downstairs and grab the backpack you left on the floor. You look around the house one last time and you can’t help but imagine him walking downstairs, where his friends once were, and see them all gone. Just himself and the ghost of what once was and never will be again.

It hurts to leave him behind, and you can’t even imagine how Nancy and Eddie feel. You have your answer once you head out and towards the back where you see Eddie wiping his cheek away while making sure the tires are all set, and how Nancy has her back towards the two of you, and her legs are slightly shaking as she looks at stuff into her weapon bag.

They are hurt from leaving him behind, way more than you are. You had to reassure them that even in loneliness, Steve will be safe. He is inside a community, guarded even if little, but he is still with people and in safety.

“Okay ladies, I think we are good to go.” Eddie says finally and you head over to Nancy, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Come on, Nance.” You see her looking at the distance, towards the same way you followed Steve the night before. You see her gulp tightly, nodding at you before turning around and heading inside the RV first. You turn to see Eddie giving you a small comforting smile as he looks at the house one last time.

He sighs as he turns towards you, bowing down as he points with his arm towards the open door of the RV. You can only smile so little at the theatrics, and you take a deep breath before you step inside, surprised to see just how well equipped it is. Two big seats at the front, driver and passenger, then followed by counters on the side, and then a couch on the other. A pull out couch. Then at the end of the kitchen counter sat a small booth, with a small table in the middle.

You see there is a small little hallway, which has the door to the toilet, and then at the very back end you can see the big double bed. It has a sliding door to close it from everyone else if needed. You are amazed by it, a small and nice motorhome for the three of you. Eddie enters the RV as Nancy starts the vehicle. He closes the door behind him and he wiggles his eyebrows at you.

“You like it? I installed the pull out couch myself. We have enough gas till the next possible gas station, and hopefully there’s still some left, so we need to make sure to not run out before that.” Nance only nods as you look up and open the bag cupboard at the top of the couch, putting your bag inside as well as Eddie’s and hers. You close it and you three hear the RV coming to life finally.

“Good job Eddie.” Nancy finally smiles his way, and Eddie puffs out his chest as he sits in the passenger’s seat, pulling the map out of the glove compartment in front of him. He had marked down all possible places they could stop at to look for more food and gas. Even toiletries. He also marked all possible gas stations, and you realize they had been planning this for a very long time.

“Okay… goodbye Hawkins you piece of shit.” Eddie says, making you hum as you take a seat on the couch. Your body suddenly sways as the RV starts to move slowly, and the excitement starts to come back to you as well as the fear of what you might encounter. You are going to your family. You are going to find your family and you will be safer this time. You have people around you, armed and willing to protect you as much as you would protect them. You won’t sleep in the mud, looking for cover under the cup of the trees. You will be sleeping either on a nice couch, or the bed whenever available.

You see how Nancy turns the lights on and off quickly, just enough to mark her way through the trees, not following the main road so no one would stop you all. Your hands were gripping the couch tightly, not wanting to look out the window, not wanting to look back, but you were itching to do so.

It takes time because Nancy is going as slow as possible so the motorhome would not do that much of a sound thanks to the engine. You know that people are already sleeping by now, except for the guards at the front gate, and you are taking the closed off one. The one in all chains.

Once you reach it, Nancy stops the RV right in front of it, Eddie getting up from the passenger’s seat to walk towards the cupboard underneath the sink of the kitchen, taking out some bolt cutters. Your eyes widen as he pulls those out and you turn to look at Nancy.

“Hang on, you are cutting those open– you are going to leave the gate open for all the community inside here!” Nancy sighs at your outburst and you hear the clanking of chains, you turn your head to see Eddie holding a new pair in his hands and a lock.

“We are not that reckless and selfish. It took me some time to find a spare pair of chains this size, and a lock, but– It’ll endure.” With those last words, he jumps off the RV, and you rush to the passenger seat to see him get into action, grabbing the cutters and start snapping the chains away.

You’re biting your lip as you see the metals falling piece by piece. Eddie hesitates for just one second before he snaps open the last chain. He pushes one of the doors open slightly and Nancy turns on the bright lights instantly. You see how he pulls it open even more and you see how there is nothing out there, giving you guys the green light to go. He gives a nod towards the two of you and pushes the first gate open and then the next one.

His eyes widen when one bright light shines your way, the guard light tower pointing your way. The sound of a loud siren blasting suddenly and you realize you’ve been caught. Nancy and you motion Eddie to leave the chain behind, that people will put it back together instead of him.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Nancy curses loudly.

Eddie snaps out of it as he rushes to the doors of the RV, the motorhome starting to move forward as you hear the screams of people, telling you to stop, to turn back, that it’s dangerous out there. The front of the vehicle is out and you’re almost passed the gate when Eddie’s head turns to his left, his panicked face falling as his eyes widen.

“Eddie, get in!” You yell, trying to snap him out, and Nancy groans loudly.

“Munson, I’m stepping the gas whether you get fully inside or not–”

“It’s Steve!” Her eyes widen as well as yours. She doesn’t stop moving, instead slowing down.

You rush towards the window, popping your head out and sure enough, you see him.

He is running fast even with a bag hanging on his back, two duffel bags on each side of his hips, his bat in one hand, the other gripping a flashlight tightly. You hear Eddie egging him on, to keep running because Nancy is not stopping, she can’t. You see the flashlights of people running towards you, right behind Steve, ready to stop you all from stepping into the danger zone.

He can’t feel his limbs anymore from how much he ran, from how dumb it was to not tell the three of you that he had actually packed, leaving the bags in his room. Dumb to tell you that he left to give his last goodbye to Robin’s parents and Robin herself. He spent all day with her. Had breakfast, had lunch, and finally dinner.

He lost track of time, and when he returned to the house, none of you were in it. His heart had crumbled to the floor, but it was just a few minutes late, so if he had any luck, you three were still near. He grabbed everything as fast as he could, rushing into the kitchen to shove one last thing into his duffel bag, and then run out. He ran through the woods with his flashlight, following the broken bushes and the tire trails the vehicle left.

As soon as the RV came into view, the lights from behind him turned on, his panic rising as he didn’t have a chance to even catch a breath. He saw how the officers and the guards started running towards him with their flashlights, and he took off. He ran as fast as his feet could take him, trying not to think of all the weight he was also carrying. He could hear Eddie calling for him, his hand reaching out already for Steve to grab.

He knew that the moment he grabbed Eddie’s hand, Hawkins would be a thing of the past. She would be the past. Everything would be the past. But Robin would have wanted him to move forward. She would have wanted him to keep on going. She would have kicked his ass if she found out he was willing to throw everything away just for her. She would have wanted him to actually live.

So he grabs onto Eddie’s hand.

Eddie pulls tightly with a grunt, using all his strength. Nancy picks up the speed and throws her foot onto the gas when Steve manages to put one foot on the first step of the RV. Eddie drags them both inside, falling onto the floor with Steve.

You are stunned as you stare down at them both. You snap out of it when you feel the cold wind, you run towards the door and shut it, locking it.

Steve is panting, no, heaving as he tries to recover his breath on all fours, staring at the floor. Eddie is sitting up, his hand coming to rest on Steve’s back. The three of you are silent, not having expected Steve to appear out of nowhere at the last minute.

“What… What happened?” Eddie asks, his own breathing heavy from the whole ordeal, and you can just stand over them both, looking as Steve starts to shake, your eyes coming to meet in the middle in worry.

“I– I was saying goodbye– I forgot to tell you, I’m so sorry–” And you can hear the choked up voice, your heart turning with sadness as Eddie’s eyes glistened, looking at his friend. Nancy couldn't stop driving, but she turned her head for just one second to look and you saw how a tear was running down her cheek, her gaze turning back to the road.

“Steve…” Eddie’s voice is low, a whisper and it was the key that opened the gate to Steve’s emotions. Through his heavy breaths, you start hearing his sobs. Choked up sobs that he wanted to swallow down, but it was impossible. Soon, his tears were hitting the floor as he stared down at it, his fingers digging into the carpet as memories flashed in his mind.

He could almost picture Robin waving at him from the gate that people were already closing. He could almost picture how she would be smiling and jumping happily the more the RV drove away. How she would be cheering him on. His cries were loud, knowing there is a part of him that was being left behind, a part that he will never in his life get back.

You could hear the sniffles coming from the driver’s seat as well, quieter than Steve’s cries of pain, and you saw how Eddie was keeping a strong face for both his friends, especially Steve who was still trying to breathe through his sobs.

You just stood there as you waited, wanting to comfort the man that was on the floor, but you knew better. It was a moment that he needed to have with his friends, with his family. You felt your own tears flowing down your cheeks. You didn’t know Robin, but from the cries of your new found friends, you realized she was loved. She was very much loved.

The road ahead was uncertain, but in Steve’s mind, only one little thing resonated, one little voice that he could hear despite the dark clouds inside it, and the screams coming out of his mouth. If he was imagining it, he hoped it would never leave him. He might have gone crazy, but he was so happy to hear her voice, at least one last time.

‘Goodbye, Dingus.’

☀︎

taglist: @prettyboyeddiemunson @thecreelhouse @tvserie-s-world @thesickestqrmydcll @crispystarfishhottub @sophal22 @definitionwanderlust @talkativecarnation @mysticalwoolenfroglegs @ariesandwolves @mortqlprojections @sattlersquarry @sherrylyn0628 @purpleeyeswithgoldensparkles @micheledawn1975 @keepingitlokiii @littleromanoff2005 @sunshine-mrk

#the edges of your soul (I haven't seen yet)#chapter three #steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington smut #stranger things angst #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington drabble #steve harrington blurb #grumpy x sunshine

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solar4seekstron · 8 months ago

Text

Sparkmates

IDW!Kup x Cybertronian!Decepticon!GN!Reader Oneshot

Content: 18+. You and Kup are couple goals. Before and during the war.

Introduction Movie/Series Oneshot Masterlist

TW/Tags: Angst, wholesome moments, (Heavily) implied sex, (fake) death, blood, Kup is my robot husband I was living my dream writing this ok sue me, mild cursing, war, Deadlock is an asshole, Super long chapter. I believe that’s all?? (I changed a bit of lore- sort of to fit the story. I hope you guys can still enjoy!!!!!

Long, long before the war. You were a warrior you trained in mastery of swords. Although you also know how to use guns.

You also knew how to use swords. That being one of your main weapons besides your blasters. You have been around for a good while. Known by many to always have a smile on your dermas and narrowed optics to give you a softer look with your yellow optics.

You were a pretty tall bot as well. Being only a few inches shorter then Kup.

Understanding and mastering most weapons. Guns or not. Even at times working with making guns alongside bots like Hound. You were a pretty strong bot. Having a well built frame and a few small features.

Both being agile but strong. Not too bulky as you had a sort of knight look at some parts of your frame. (Almost like Rodimus in Animated. Just imagine that frame in IDW).

Before the war. You were once known for working along side your Sire Yoketron as he trains younger bots to protect theirselves.

One day when visiting Hound. You met him…Kup.

And boy were things different since then for the both of you. At the time he wasn’t an old bot who smoked and grumbled over everything as he worked under Optimus. He was a lot younger of course. His winkles having no existence at the time as he had a lot more life in him. Well that’s a lot more visible. (Think like a stereotypical hot college guy lol)

You two would eventually start chatting and before you both knew it. You both bonded. After Kup spent some time winning your Sire over for approval.

You always encouraging him to keep going forward and to show your sire his determination.

You two would then learn to except each others interest more and points of views over time. Then…on one faithful day….

He popped the question. Your courtship starting and before you knew it. You both were bonded.

But like most good things. It must come to an end.……

One day when in his apartment. Kup was going to ask you to join him and the Autobots. But when you returned speaking of your point of view with the decepticons. You two realized. You both were on a different path.

It was heartbreaking. But you both agreed to not hurt each other if you both can help it if your paths should ever cross….

You both couldn’t hold in your tears that night as you both left for war.

And so years went by. Before you knew it, its been millions of years. You were able to age slower thanks to the meditation and calmness of your nature. Not to mention how well you took care of yourself when not training and in battle.…

At times at least. Many decepticons throughout the years have tried to win your heart as you don’t seem older as most would expect you to be. Not to mention you skill and strong yet soft personality. Always having stories to tell.

Something that catches many by surprise. And the way you handle things even is also part of why other bots and femmes grow feelings for you. But you always end up as almost like a carrier, mentor, or sire to some bots anyway.

Overtime, although you won’t admit it. There’s one thing you do often look forward to when out on missions with other bots and femmes..

Is the possibility of running into Kups team. The Weckers.

You and Kup both made sure that no other Cybertronians knew about your relationship with each other long ago. But that doesn’t mean anything was still easier for the both of you. While you two would exchange looks. You two will never admit this now.

But you both always held back when trying to shoot at each other.

Luckily something Megatron will never find out. After all Megatron had no reason to not trust you. You’re one of his strongest worriors and one of the trusted advisors in his council. In both guns and swords.

Hand in hand combat as you were one of the bots who taught him to continue to be stronger.

Everything stayed like that since. Kup would lead and teach the bots under him and with him. Perceptor being the only one to know the relationship the two of you had.

One day though everything would change for the two of you. Unser if it’s for the better…or for the worse.

———————————————————————————

Kup and a few of the other wreckers were on their usual patrol. Keeping an optic out for any decepticons from coming near the base. After some time the wreckers started making conversation and well…Kup has always stayed secretive with some things. Even as the others knew something was always up when speaking about relationships.

As they continue, you and your group were heading to their location to find some energon. This group always taking you with them as back up.

Deadlock being one of the bots. You and him always got along. But nothing really in common. Despite the comments many would make and assume about you two.

Many assuming you both would become a couple because “Swords” and both having a sort of understanding with peace. But the truth was.

Most Decepticons at your area at least. But you two… Could give less of a shit about each other.

As you all made your way to your designated location in your alt modes. One of the femmes say they should transform and look around once set up.

Having the 2 snipers look for any camp as the others watch around to protect.

You and Deadlock up front and watching.

Both having one arm down as the other bent and the cervo on a sword handle. You and Deadlock both doing this but with opposite cervos. Standing far from the snipers as the others started working on their weapons.

“You sure this gun blaster with work Y/N?” A femme asks you as she kneels down next to you. You glancing down at her as you let out a sigh.

But not in annoyance. You’d not then speak without looking at the bot.

”I designed it didn’t I. You can trust with promise it works.” Deadlock side eyed you before looking forward for a moment. The bot huffed as the femme got the weapon ready before sitting down with it.

The femme from earlier walking into the open land searching for life and energon. Becoming bate for any possible autobot.

Luckily she’s fast so killing her will be hard.

Back with Kup and his gang one of the bots sees the decepticon. Another fight soon insues. You and Deadlock soon getting involved as you both ran together into battle.

During the long fight it was you against Springer who made sure to insult and in his way flirt with you every now and then.

Meanwhile Deadlock took on Kup.

Deadlock was able to get a good upper hand. Even insulting Kup for his age when he can. Despite being aware you were around the same age as him.

With you and Springer the fight was just as intense.

As you two fought. You mostly were in hand in hand combat. Showing his boxing skills no match for your martial arts.

But because you both were on higher ground. You both ended up falling down a steep and long hill.

Falling into tree of an unknown planet (not earth). Springer dragging you along as he try’s to get into a few good punches.l

As you both fell to the ground. You two now seperated by the others. You’d make your way to pin Springer down. Getting ontop of him and holding him down as he struggles against you.

—-

Meanwhile with Kup. He wasn’t having much of a good time either. Deadlock being able to get an upper hand.

Stabbing his sword into and through Kups leg before then twisting it in for good measures. Causing Kup to groan and scream as he lays there. Doing the same thing to his arm on the other side of his body. Both his upper arm and upper thigh now injured as he groans and looks at Deadlock. Deadlock just casually cleaning his swords before looking down at him.

”Sweet dreams…..you old brute.”

From there he walked away. Leaving Kup there as he bleeds out.

Back with you and springer he was able to get you off him…eventually. After being able to grab something off the floor and stabbing at your thigh with it. Causing you to groan. He’s stab you once more at the side of your waist.

Pushing you and shoving you down with both hands.

As he was fast to get ontop of you. Soon he stabbed you in your left eye before shoving your face down into the ground as he puts you in a headlock as you struggled against his strength. He defiantly trained with Kup before.

”You once had honor before joining Megatrons fake cause! I only hope Primus may forgive your spark as he sees the blood on your hands…..Him and Yoketron…”

You’d continue trying to fight against him but it was no use. For a moment you believed him though. Maybe…it was best to see if it’s time for you. After all no one’s really waiting for you now.

And so…you gave up. Your arms no longer on his as he continues.. Eventually you stopped moving.

Springer then letting you go.

He’d leave after spitting on your frame. Making his way to the others as he climbed up. Eventually the two teams would seperate as the decepticons realize they’d have to retreat. Thanks to you missing and Deadlock couldn’t take them all on.

The others asking where you were. Only for the leader to say you are in the Autobots mercy now as a response. Deadlock not paying much mind as he transformed and drove with the others.

The same thing happening with the Autobots.

Believing Kup was killed by one of you until Springer mentioned he killed you.

At least that’s what he thinks.

After some time when everyone else was gone. The wreckers believing Kup was gone. After a few kliks it soon started to pour with green rain. A moment of silence.

That is….until you woke up with a gasp. Soon standing up as you looked around confused. You’re…alive? That-…how??? You’d look around and wonder.

Returning to the field only to see everyone was gone as you notice their tire marks on the mud around you.

As you kept looking around you soon find….Kup.

Kup groaned as he tries to stop the bleeding from his arm. Only for it to at times be too painful for him to try to stop it. His groans loud as he closed his optics. You made your way closer to him and kneeled down.

”Kup.” Your voice soft as he slowly looked up at you. The rain almost getting in his way. So you leaned your upper body over his.

Using your cervos to support yourself over him. Your cervos on both sides of his helm as he finally looks at you. Taking note of your optics injury. “I’m truly dyin’….Guess I’ve always knew it be you who’s the last thing I see during this whole damn war.”

He chuckled. You missed that chuckle. “Dont worry Kup. I’ll get you patched up.”

You’d then get to work on his injures. He’d groan from time to time as you took out a few of your tools from your hip. You’d take a few from your first aid before every mission. You’d check on him once you finished.

“Kup you still with me?”

Kup then looks at you as he sighed. “Yeah…But don’t really like this rain much though.”

You’d sigh as you think for a moment. You’d then gently pull him up. Ignoring the pain the stabs in your thigh. Having him on your back with your cervos under his thighs as his frame rests against your back, the arm not injured wrapping around you neck as you walked to a close by cave you noticed when making your way to the spot earlier that day.

———————————————————————————

As you both made it to the cave you made sure to be very gentle with him. Setting him down against the wall of the cave. His cervo gently holding his injured arm as you checked his leg injury.

While you worked on it you didn’t expect to hear his voice as you kneeled before him consecrated.

”Why…Why are you helpin’ me Y/N Our…Our agreement…”

”Kup..I just…I just can’t right now.” You stay silent for a moment as Kup looks at you with curious optics.

“There’s more Y/N. Just spit it out.” You sigh.

”I just couldn’t leave you to die. I don’t wish to just leave you to bleed out….Even if you would do the same to me….” You looked down. His frown still there but..sadder. “Y/N…Do you still-”

He doesn’t finish as you grab his location transmission for his ship to come to you guys. “Y/N what are you-“

”You need to make it to the medical bay. Or else you’ll die.”

”But you need help too! Dont try being a hero now after everything! At least let the medic patch up you-“

”KUP!…….You. Come…First. The Autobots…they wont care I’m just another dirty decepticon who’s just leading you to deception…That’s all I am and all I’ll be! Understood!? You are going to be saved and we go our seperate ways. Like before as agreed!”

You’d keep at his leg before satisfied with how it is.

Kup only stared at you until he notices a big rock close to him.

“You know, when I think of us before. The possibility of us reuniting after our…separation. I thought it be on…different circumstances….heh even the possibility of it being over as we fought each other at most.”

You stay quiet for a moment before finally speaking as you then looked at him as you spoke. “Oh yeah and how you oof-“

Kup knocked you out with the rock in his cervo. He panted as he leaned back and looked at your unconscious body. Memories start flowing through his mind.

Snippets of you laying next to him on your shared berth. Your bright smile when you both were still young adults. When he would watch you sleep peacefully next to him. Back when you two were still Conjunx.

When you both still showed your love together…

Soon as he’s pulled out of his thought. The lights of his rescue ship appears. Kup letting out a sigh…He has a lot of explaining to do now…..

———————————————————————————

After Kup was saved and you were taken in. Kup explained everything to his and Optimus. Optimus was a bit more understanding and asked the right questions as they interrogate him.

After Optimus told Kup that although they must hold you captive. You are a dangerous bot after all. Having a reputation amongst the Autobots. Springer was to say at most, the most surprised after hearing you saved him.

But just like everyone else. He wasn’t sure how that was possible. It has to be some sort of miracle that you survived. Only being knocked out and all.

Soon after when Kup and his team go on thier own ship once more. With you as prisoner. The young bots didn’t waist anytime with flooding Kup with questions. ”So what the hell is the story with you two- like you two make out before knocking them unconscious?”

”More importantly how did you even bag that! They’re way more good looking then you!”

”Not too mention probably younger Kup!”

”What was sex with them like?”

”GIVE US TIPS OR SOMETHING OLD MAN!!!!!!!!!”

Kup has had it. Standing up and yelling at the bots to shut up.

“Will you all shut up alright??!! Ok we dated! We were married for a good while before the war. We went our different ways. That’s all you need to know! They chose to save me for some reason alright! I don’t know why either. But I couldn’t leave them on that planet to bleed out!!!…….Now drop it.”

He sits back in his seat as he looked down.

Springer then sighs and looks at the others. All of them with pleading optics for him to ask you a very certain question.

He’d then command for the ship to go on autopilot and turn his chair towards Kup who just sat there.

”Kup…tell us how you and Y/N….met.” Kup glances back at Springer as well as the other bots did. He’d then sigh. Turning his chair toawrds the direction to the others as he rubbed the bridge of his nose with his closed optics. Letting out an annoyed groan as he looked at the others.

“Fine Y’all really wish to know? I’ll tell ya. But NO interrupting. Understood?”

The bots nod as they stare at him. All then pulling out some energon like popcorn. Kup then speaks of the very you and Kup met.

———————————————————————————

I was but a young bot at the time. Before the many of your were born. I wasn’t always such an old bot either.

Back then I didn’t have my wrinkles and not much of a smoking habit then. I was just an ordinary bot. Trying to find work to help protect under the council at the time.

I was good friends with Hounds boss who had the best war stories. And he owned a pretty good guns and weapons store along with a shooting area. Little did I know. He got his weapons specialized and even practived by a certain bot who would change my life then.

And…in a way I still don’t and will never regret that moment….even now. They’re still the most…..fascinating bot I have ever seen…..Y/N…..

The door chimes as you walked in. Your swords on your hip handles as usual. You pretty much looked the same. Having no eye bags and no wrinkles like the more faded ones you’ll have in present time.

You had your usual smile on your dermas.

Your optics narrowed as you sighed. Making your way to the front counter. Kup was there feeling the guns weight in his cervos before noticing you at the corner of his optics.

He’d look at you as you pass by. His intake open a bit as he stares at you. You speak to Hound as his mind starts racing.

Eventually putting the gun down before he works up the confidence to come up from behind to next to you. Resting his elbow on the counter as his frame faces you. Trying to put on the best smile he can.

But it ends up being more nerdy and awkward. You’re looking at a gun Hound gave you to look over as Kup finally speaks.

”Hey there. Haven’t seen you around..here..” He drifts as he notices your swords. You’d glance at them then back at him. Then raising your cervo to him to shake as you kept your signature smile. “Y/N. And you are?”

He slowly shakes yours as he smiles once more. “Kup. So uhh you-”

”Alright Y/N I got your payment. Tell your Sire I said hello.” Hound walks in interrupting you both. Kup feeling a bit of pain in his spark as he struggled with his words. His cervo still out and his arm bent.

You and hound speaking for a moment more.

”Goodbye Kup. It’s nice having have met you.” Your soft voice pulling him from his thoughts. He watched as you leave. Both your arms stay on your sides as your hips sway. Kup stands there with his intake open as his arms falls to his side finally.

Hound noticed and closed his intake using a digit as he looked at him confused. “You good?

I wasn’t- after that I just couldn’t get them out of my helm. Such a strange but exciting feeling. And so that next day. I made a….choice.

“Hey Hound.”

”Kup? What brings you here? Didn’t you just do your pick ups yesterday?” Kup rubbed the back of his helm.

”Yes- but I was wondering ‘bout that bot yesterday. Y/N?”

”You’re still on about that bot? They’re just someone who works at that dojo. Barely even use guns themselves. I’d say forget’em now Kup. It ain’t like you to-“ Hound was then pinned roughly against the wall by Kup.

”Hound. Just give me the location of them and I wont tell your boss your dirty little secret with his daughter.” Hound gulped as his cervos stay up. “Okay-“

Wait- Hound actually got laid?

That’s besides the point! After Hound finally spoke. His intake actually to some use. I made my way to the dojo. I wasn’t sure on what I was goin’ to say or do. But I knew I just had to try…Not like I had anyone waiting for more besides some roommates.

Kup made his way to the dojo your sire owns. As you were in the training room, helping elementary sparklings learn to kick. Your sire Yoketron was at the front desk speaking to one of his students.

He was a few feet taller. Having a more bulky build.

Kup walks in and looked around. The student leaving as Yoketron turns his attention to Kup as he places his cervos behind his back.

“What brings you here young bot? Is it guidence on your….violent path? Or…something more?” His optics narrow as he stares down at Kup. Noticing Kups traits and the way he stands.

Kup looked up at him with his optics a bit wide.

“Uh yeah- Y-yes! I’m looking for a certain bot. Their name bein’ Y/N. You happen to know them?”

”Tall bot, two swords, yellow optics?” He says say he pointed at his own optics. Even tilting his head as he spoke.

”Yes that’s them! Heh. Wondering to ask them about possibly….I don’t know going out or somethin. So they work here. Right?” The two stared at each other. Yoketron had his helm tilted a bit as he stared down at him. After a second he finally blinks then narrowed his eyes.

”What is your name and occupation young bot?” he asks placing his cervos back behind his back.

”Name’s Kup. I’m currently training under the council for the military. I serve and protect to fight in any future wars and serve the city. I mostly handle in guns you see.” He gently pats his rifle in the gun holder on his hip. Yoketron seems a bit alarmed but stays firm as he listened.

“Would you say guns should be used for “much” combat in way?”

Kup thought for a moment. “Uhhh Well yes I suppose since it’s faster and gets the job done more then well why not?”

Yoketron stands there again. But his helm no longer titled as he then looked at him and blinked. At first Kup almost had a grin. Thinking he got him to agree to let him see you. But then as Yoketron walked out.

He was holding the back collar and waist of Kup. Throwing him out as he falls on his aft with a groan. Kup then looking back at Yoketron as he sat there.

”Until you can learn to find your inner peace and to not rely so heavily in the studies of…Just Guns. But the possible use to better help one forth called enemy. You may see my child then…Kup.”

He’d then close the door as Kup groans and stands up.

Walking away. That’s until he gets an idea as he sees the dojo is also a home in the upstairs.

When Yoketron walked up the stairs to the living room of your apartment later that evening, you were making energon cake to celebrate his birthday. You’d notice something was up with him. “Are you ready Sire?”

“Yes my little one.” He responds with a smile. You keep your usual smile and serve him his energon cake as he sits down. You taking your seat next to him as he looks at the candles. His cervos on the table. “Make a wish Sire.”

wait- How’d your know that happened?

……….They told me.

Oh-.

Now stop interrupting!

Sorry-

So..later after buying some flowers and walking around a store close by. Waiting for my chance of either their old man leaving or even just seeing them through the glasss window.

I soon saw my chance as I saw their Sire Yoketron walk out of the dojo. Once he was far enough and I saw then at the front desk. I went straight in for their heart! I was a lot more naive at the time….

After some cake, Yoketron got ready for his outing. “I’ll be visiting some old friends from my teen years. You’ll be fine while I’m out my little one?”

“Yes Sire. Now enjoy yourself. I shall be here upon your return.”

He nods and walks out after giving you a warm. As he left. It being mid afternoon. Kup was waiting on the other side of the building next door. You’d make your way to the front inside ahead of the front desk. You’d start cleaning the floors with a broom. From there Kup makes his way closer. Seeing you as you had your back to the glass door. He had some flowers from the store across.

Before he walked in he checked his looks at his reflection in the glass. He groan at himself. Why was he acting like this???

He’d then clear his throat once he walked in. “Y/N hello-“

You’d turn around and see him as you still held your broom. “Oh Kup hello. What brings you here? Are in search for self defense possibly?”

He chuckles as he got closer to you.

”Well no. I’m just here to speak uh speak to you actually…” You two are silent for a moment. He seemed like he wanted more to say.

“Uhhh these are for you!!! Thought it be a nice restart of…meeting?”

You chuckled as you set the broom down and gently took the flowers. Your cervos gently brushing against his.

He blushed a bit. And he had to hold back his grin from getting bigger. You gently smelled the flowers before looking at him. “Thank you Kup. They’re beautiful. Is there anything I can do for you?”

”Weeeeell a date would be nice. Maybe at that restuarent down the street of the broadcast tower?”

He was panicking inside as he looked at you. Your optics widened a bit and even had a small blush on your cheeks. Your smile only gone for a moment before soon returning. You’d narrowed your optics as you looked back at the flowers. You’d then let out a soft chuckle.

“Alright Kup. Since you asked so nicely.”

Kup had the cutest and most silliest grin as he looked at you. But from there both of your optics widened as you both look back at the sound of a voice. “Little one I apologize. I forgot to tell you….”

Yoketron walks in with a smile on his dermas. But that soon leaves when he sees ou too. Only seeing ou through the glass.

You stood there. Still holding a large bouquet in your arms as you stood there. Your face blank as your bright yellow optics looked up at him. Kups face now full of worry and a bit of fear.

You’d then smile.

”Ah Sire Welcome back. This is Kup. What was it that troubles you?”

Yoketron was definitely holding back as he forced a smile. “Oh doesn’t matter. Just missed you little one.”

He walks over to you ignoring Kup. “Ah these flowers are beautiful.”

”Aren’t they? Kup here bought them for the store across I believe. Aren’t they lovely.” You’d smile.as you looked at Kup. Kup was internally screaming on the inside. “I’ll uh see you then……Bye!”

From there Kup left as Yoketron rested a cervo on your shoulder. You were confused but then pulled from your train of thought as your Sire spoke.

“That young one is not guided well my little one. Best be careful with him as you carve your path. And I’m afraid I’ll be gone for a few days. So the shop will be closed for a few until the weekend. Understood my dear?”

You’d nod. “Yes Sire I’ll be fine.” He’d smile and leave. He’d then look around then make his way to his destination.

And so after that I made my way back to my apartment. I thought about them. That’s literally all I could do. I just couldn’t stop. It was then though that I realized…..I forgot to set a date and time-

And so that same night after some tips from some friends. I got an idea.

As you made you way to your berthroom. Writing in your notebook of possible weapon upgrades. You’re pulled from your thoughts as you hear a knock on your window. You’d then see its Kup hanging on for dear life.

“Kup!!!”

You’d open the window and he’d sit on the window frame. One leg in as he spoke.He

“Hey sorry I forgot to tell you a date and time.”

”Oh that’s alright figured you’d visit tomorrow or somethin…..Would you like anything?”

”Oh no no I’m just thinking maybe we can meet…meet at 4…tomorrow?”

You let out a soft chuckle and nod.

“Sure I’ll see you then Kup.” He took note your smile is a bit wider as lets out a nervious chuckled and you two stared at each other.

”Well I should probably uhh head home from there. S…see you then.” He climbs out and closes the window. Him smiling as you did the same. Both of you looking at each others optics. But when he tried to take a step back. Your body turned to the side before fully turning around as you crossed your arms.

Kup forgets he’s on a roof. He falls back and lets out a shout. You’d hear and run to the window. Opening it as you looked for him. Sticking your upper body out the window as you looked down.

”Are you alright?!”

”Yeah yeah…I’m fine.” He’d say as he stood up. After dusting himself off he waves at you with a smile. “Until then!”

“Until then…” You waved back as you watched him walk away. A chuckle leaving your intake and a smile on your dermas. After he was out of view you’d close the window and head to your berth.

And from there. So much has happened. Our date went perfect as you can imagine. The two of us having a lot on common in fact. We both enjoying a lot of things including guns and war tactics. They weren’t as peace on earth as you’d expect. Even when you’d look at their Sire. They had…more character and much tougher even.

Which defiently my type. After our date we ended the day with a kiss. Though I’ll admit I did get a bit carried away. But who wouldn’t?

And so after we’d have a few more dates. Eventualy when their sire returned I got to meet him in better terms. I eventually won his heart after I agreed to train under him for a good while just to gain his trust…..

And so after a few months after we started dating. I grew more in love with them every single day. Every..second I’d look at them. Think of them. And even when I didn’t think of them for a moment I’d still catch myself falling in love with them more and more. That was…..until the war started.

Everyone was choosing sides. Losing their jobs and so on. I wanted them to join the Autobots so that we can be together as we grow old through the war…but…

As you made your way into your shared apartment with Kup. He was sitting on the couch. His cervos together and his helm low. His knee moving up and down in his nervousness before he looked up at you.

“Y/N! You weren’t attacked were you?”

”No Kup. You know I can protect myself.” You say as he stood and walked up to you. His cervos on your waist as he looked down at you with worried optics.

You placing your cervos on his chest and shoulders as your forhelms touch. Tears forming in your optics.

”They…they got to Yoketron….I..I couldn’t tell if they were decepticons or Autobots-“

”Shh Shh Y/N. It’s ok…. I’m so sorry…He’s with the all spark now. He’s with Primus now. At least he wont be a part of this war now sweetspark…” He kisses your forhelm as you closed your optics.

You calm your tears as you looked up at him..”Kup……Megatron and Optimus Primes words….Their points of views….”

Kups optics widen a bit before returning to narrowing. Sad but almost hope in his optics as he spoke. “Y/N I…..I made the choice to join the Autobots….I..I don’t know if you…”

He sees tears fall down your cheeks more as you stared at him…..He finally sees it once you pulled back a bit. The decepticon logo on your chest as you cried. He just stares at it. Processing it..

”Is this…what you truly believe to be right for you sweetspark?” His voice cracked a bit at sweetspark.

His forhelm touching yours once more. “….Yes Kup…Megatron has a point with this…messed up system….and…and…” His dermas were against yours.

You returning the kiss immediately as both of your optics remained closed.

The kiss was passionate. Much like your first as it lasted. But…sadder now. Your soft kisses the only thing heard in the room as you both held each other for a bit longer.

Eventually he’d pull away for a moment. His dermas a little close to yours as he whispers. “I wont fight you sweetspark….But….” His cervos now on your shoulders as he pulls away. His optics soft as he has the frown he’ll soon wear all the time to his old age as he spoke.

”An autobot…cant be with a decepticon…and if our paths were to ever cross….we shouldn’t hold back….We are nothing more but enemies from then on……”He says as he walks past you to the door. Saying that last part as he opened the door.

“You shall always be in my spark…maybe in another life.” You two gave each other one last kiss. Not caring if it’s right or wrong…

Once he pulls away. He backs up only a little bit.

“Good bye..Sweetspark….I’ll always keep you in my spark.. even if I can’t see it.”

Once he was out. You teared up only more. You two saying that was your way of saying I love you. You falling to your knees as Kup hears your soft sobs through the door. Tears falling down his cheeks as he tried to remain strong. Making his way to Optimus once his tears finally disappeared….

———————————————————————————

“And that’s basically how it ended…”

The few of the wreckers were holding in their tears as they just stared at Kup.

Bulkhead though was the biggest cry baby in there as whirl tried to calm him down. “Chill out dude-“

”AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH It’s so Saaaaaaaaad” Bulkhead cries as he blows his “nose” in a tissue. As the others cry too, even Kup looked at them surprised.

Springer then becomes the one with the idea. “Kup maybe you should….talk to them. Try to understand this and well….maybe in some way…there’s hope for the both of ya.”

Kup took in his words as he looked down for a moment. The others agreeing with him as Kup then sighs. “Yeah I…Guess I’ll give it a try.”

He’d stand up as the others watched. Making his way the cells where you were behind held captive in.

You were already awake. Your cuffed to the wall with two of your arms up. Same with your ankles being cuffed as well as you could only watch out the window from your cell.

Eventually though you’d notice the cameras turning off as their lights turned off.

Kup soon appears, opening the cell. You took note he had a bandage on his leg and his arm. He did have a limp. He took note of your bandages as well. You had a patch over your eye now as well as a bandage on your thigh as you’re held up.

Along with a wrap around your waist.

He’d make his way to stand infront of you. Leaving the cell opened as you two stare at each other in silence.

Until he spoke.

”They um….patched you up pretty well huh..”

”Yeah..They did. …They um…They..:

“Kup..Why are you here?”

Kup thinks. He thinks hard as you look at him.

”Why don’t we..have a chat. Hm?” He pulls a chair and sits in front of you.

”Sure, not like I can go anywhere.” You both chuckled as you both began to speak. Talking abut the good. The bad. Everything throughout the year. Eventually the two of you reach a heart to heart.

Even as you spoke about how the Decepticons are no longer what they were build up for in the first place.

But despite you wanting to leave. It was a lot harder than what most Cybertronians would expect. You’d explain how you’d wish to leave but always felt so trapped. Especially when around Deaddlock who is one of the only few bots who can match you.

Then you two spoke about the past when you both dated. You made a mention. Something you forgot to keep secret from your hot headed partner. Causing him to stand up as he confronts you.

”You were once courted by Hound??! How come I never heard of this before??”

”He asked me to not tell you. Me and him just ended things on good terms when we realized it wouldn’t work out.”

”How long before us?”

”…………”

”Y/N.”

”mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm like two…..” He raises an optics ridge. “Two?…”

”weeks-“

”Two weeks before we met??!!”

”Yeap-“

Kup started losing his crap. Throwing the chair and talking shit about Hound.” That guy can’t even- UUGHH!!!”

”Yeah and after that he went into a relationship with his bosses daughter. At least he finally realized what he wanted before breaking another’s heart huh.”

You’d say with a smile as Kup finally calmed down. Before standing before you again. “Oh we are so having a talk later. I already…….I already spent enough time here…..”

”Will you…visit me again?”

You’d say as he looked at you before grabbing his cigar. Something he did out of habit everyday. He’d look at you. Your optic soft and…sad..

He’d then think again before coming closer to you. His chest almost touching yours as he spoke. “I want you to be honest with me….Do you…..Do you still love me Y/N?”

You’d stare into his optics. Both surprised but….honestly happy from his question. So as you opened your intake. You spoke nothing but the truth.

”Honestly….The love I have for you…It never truly went away. What we both had back then…It never truly stopped.”

Kup only stared at you. Knowing that you’re telling the truth. He’d then sigh before nodding as he looks at you once more. Only to start uncuffing the cuffs on your ankles.

”Kup what are you-“

“Before I do your hands…Y/N will you join the Autobots? Join me? The wreckers are one of the best teams you’ll ever join! Join me and we can restart!……This is the only chance I can give you…..”

His cervos rested on your waist as you looked away for a moment. Maybe this can be your chance?…..Why not? And so with a shaky voice but warm and soft…you spoke.

”I will fight..For the Autobots.” Causing Kup to smile as he finally releases your arms from the cuffs. His arm around your waist as he handles the other cuff.

So when you were finally not against the wall, you weight was against him and he gently sets you on the floor. Your cervos on his shoulders as his other arm wraps around your waist as well. You both staring at each other with small smiles on both of your dermas.

“So, you goin’ kiss me like you miss me?” You asked teasing. Him letting out a soft chuckle.

”Boy did I ever before huh?” You both let out a chuckle as your dermas soon meet.

Unlike your last one. Similar to your very first kiss. While still filled with love and passion. It wasn’t full of sadness like the last one. Or unsure and scared as the first one. This….this one is more certain. Almost impatient as your cervos move to the back of his helm.

His arms around your waist gently holding you against him as the kiss grows more hungry. His cervos then picking you up by your thighs, you moving your legs around his waist as your cervos remain where they are.

You’d pull away for a moment. Your optics narrowed as your dermas are close to his. His optics narrowed as well.

“I missed you Kup..”

“…..I missed you too sweetspark..” you both smiled.

Both soon returning to your kiss. It becoming more and more heating as you both cling to each other.

Luckily since the Wreckers didn’t have any other prisoners. You both didnt have to worry about making too much noise. Until you got forgot of course.

Before you both knew it Kup had your back against the wall. The sounds of your kisses and moans in the cell as you both soon then..hear a couple clicks.

You two defiently have a lot of making up to do. Every second worth it!

—Meanwhile with the Wreckers….

Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank Clank

Whirl was sipping on some energon coffee. Only for it to fall on his lap from the cup and make a mess as the others were playing cards. Springer having his cervos interlocked as he watched forward. Bulkhead then looking at Springer ad the others soon do the same.

Springer then sighs as he rubs the bridge of his nose. “He earned it. Can’t say scrap this time guys.”

The others groan.

“Yeah that’s it just like the old days!!!” Kup yells causing the wreckers to groan more and Bulkhead to cover his own audio sensors. This went on for a good while after…..-

Bonus—

As you spoke to the Wreckers.

Them curious on how someone like Kup was able to convince you to date him.

Looking at your point of view.

Kup can be seen in the background strangling Springer with just his cervos as Springers own are on Kups arms. Trying to stop him.

Yeah Springer told Kup why you were knocked out.

So Kup descided to teach the poor lad a lesson on what happens when you mess with his sparkmate.

A lesson he’ll surely never forget.

UGH!!!!!! I LOVED WRITING THIS!!!!! THIS WAS SO FUN AND GOD IM SO HAPPY TO FINALLY WRITE FOR HIM!!!!

I hope all you other Kup simps were able to read and enjoyed this. Sorry that it’s so long. I got so carried away but I regret nothing!!!! I hope you to see you guys in the comments and hear y’all opinions. So ya know don’t be too mean lol.

Anyway y’all know a repost is always appreciated and I hope to see you guys in the next post and have a good rest of your day!!!!

#x reader #transformers #transformers x reader #transformers idw x reader #idw tf #tf idw #idw deadlock #idw kup #transformers kup x reader #transformers kup #tf kup #kup

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kentoxo · 9 months ago

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friction | reader (f) x crush!nanami pt.4

pairing: reader (f) x crush!nanami

synopsis: [AU] you have always had a crush on nanami. since the day you were hired as his personal assistant, you've been right at his side combating numbers and making money within the finance department for the company you two worked for. but, things take a turn when nanami catches wind of your feelings, and rejects you. little did he know the weight of his mistake.

warnings: angst, heartbreak, sexual tension, jealousy (future smut)

a/n: i apologize as ill be working through this weekend so the next chapter might take a day or so. thank you for your patience <3

all parts: pt.1, pt.2, pt.3,

December | Tokyo, Japan | Friday

It still felt fresh, despite a whole day having passed.

Unlike the day prior, you moved slower than usual. You got not a wink of sleep, and that reflected in the death of your eyes. Sluggish hands prepare your cup of coffee, but you forgot to add sugar so your first sip made you regret everything. Everything was suddenly out of tune, and you were losing your inner rhythm. The worst part: it was reflecting your work.

Nanami noticed when you forgot to email an important document that you specifically got sealed by the board a few days prior.

He also noticed that you forgot almost every meeting you had planned for him today. Luckily you had it synced to the cloud calendar, and Nanami had his alerts on for them.

He finally realized you were off your game when you couldn’t recite the numbers from last year around festive time. Those numbers usually remained right behind your hand at all times.

“Y/N, are you well?” Nanami asked in the video call you both were in. Despite working remotely, Nanami preferred having the two of you on video call at all times unless there were meetings to attend to, or independent work that didn’t require one another's presence. “You don’t seem 100%.”

One again, Nanami was in what looked like a comfortable sweatshirt. His light pink lips were straight, with a dew of coffee hanging from the right side of his bottom lip. His eyes were imbued with exhaustion, but it seems he had a fine rest last night. Those blond locks were now completely dry, and looked like it was styled by just flipping his hair to the side with his fingers. Slightly dented lines define his collarbones, jaw, and cheekbones.

Fuck.

“m’okay,” you lie casually, leaning back into your couch. You, in contrast, have your video off. You made no effort to beat your face with makeup, nor did you even run fingers through your hair to fix it up a bit. Your heart was wounded, and your mind was disinterested in everything. “I didn’t sleep too well, that’s all.”

“Mm,” Nanami hums. His eyes dart towards something, and you hear his click clacks of his keyboard. “Since you let me into your home yesterday, why don’t you take the rest of the day off? I’ll pay you for the remaining hours.”

You quickly sit up and put your hands back on the keyboard, “no, that’s not right. It wouldn’t be fair to everyone else if I left early with pay just because I was a little restless last night.”

“You do the work of 5 of your coworkers,” Nanami jokes lightly. “I’m confident nobody will say a thing regarding you taking a bit of time to rest more.”

They were willing to spread true rumors about your crush, though.

“You might need me,” you persist, “I don’t want to risk my absence when something important arises.”

“I’m glad you know your worth, but I insist that you sit this one out and just rest. Consider this a head start on your weekend,” Nanami insists curtly. “Before I let you rest however, I do have something to make you aware of.”

“Yes?” You slouch a bit, but your ears remain sharp and attentive.

“I’ll be returning to my actual office next week, just for the 3 days that we are in-office,” Nanami begins. He stops his typing and weaves his hands together before resting his chin on them. “We have a few important clients coming in, thanks to Haibara’s persistence. So, I’ll need to be back in my office for just a bit. For that time, you will be working more independently.”

“I understand,” you concur. “But, will you not need me during these meetings?”

“Confidentiality,” Nanami reasons, to your dismay. It’s never a big deal, but you always liked to join Nanami’s meetings. Not only to document important points for him, but to remind him to bring things up during these conversations that he might forget to do otherwise. “These clients are a bit… different than what we’re used to. But we need their company’s marketing in order to resume flourishing here.”

“Understood,” you reply.

“For the time being, please refer to Haibara for anything I might need from you. From how it’s looking,” Nanami hums. He brings a hand down to his mouse and starts to share his screen. You watch intently as he opens a calendar of his work schedule for the mentioned Monday-to-Wednesday. “I’ll be booked from morning until punch out. Haibara will be joining me for a good chunk of these meetings, so I’ll be sure to have him give you the download on what I’ll need from you.”

You nod to nobody, “copy. I’ll be sure to continue doing my best.”

“Anything less is impossible from you, Y/N,” Nanami says sweetly. There’s something stale about his flattery now. “Go ahead and rest, Y/N. You deserve it. Thank you for your work today.”

“Thank you, and I’m sorry,” you murmur. An aggressive yawn escapes your lips, and you rub your face a bit to try and waive the exhaustion.

“Nothing to apologize for– I’m the one sending you away,” the hazel-eyed man hums, slightly amused at your mannerisms. “I’ll put your time in right now, so just approve it upon receiving the notification.”

“I will, thank you.” You were itching to end the call and decay in your bed. “Have a fruitful rest of your day, Nanami kacho.”

To your surprise, Nanami held a sudden distasteful expression on his face. You watch as his face softens, but his hazel eyes seem… perplexed. As though you said something wrong, or rather; offensive. He casually tugs at his right ear before clearing his throat through a scratchy cough.

“Thank you, Y/N,” Nanami lets out, his voice slightly less monotone. “Rest well.”

With that, you hang up the call, slam your laptop shut, and rush under the covers of your bed. You find solace in the softness of the cotton, and the weight of the quilt itself. You rub your face once more, but this time feeling the burning of over-cried eyes. Your eyes were tissue-abused, as the tears felt endless yesterday after Nanami left. It was scary how upset you were about this.

Fishing your phone from the sea of sheets, you quickly dial Haibara’s number and wait with the phone against your ear. After a few rings, he answers, “Y/N?”

“Hi, Yu,” you say quietly, your head melting into your pillow. “How are you?”

“I’m well,” Haibara begins, “but you sound horrible, what happened now? Did he say something mean again?"

“m just tired,” you say simply. And it was true, you were. But Haibara already knew the reason why, and ensured that he would avoid mentioning it. “Nanami let me clock out early. I wasn’t really myself today.”

“Ah, Y/N, please,” Haibara urged with worry on his tongue. He knew it was inevitable. He didn’t warn you because he didn’t want you to date his closest friend. But rather, he knew his close friend so well that you would end up heartbroken no matter how it went. “I’m glad he noticed and sent you off to rest. But please… don’t let yourself fall like this. We just went through this yesterday."

You could feel the tears working their way up again. “Yu, I just… I’m just so upset, and I can’t do anything about it.” Your words slur, your voice being altered by your emotion. Tears well up in your eyes, spilling out and splotching your pillow case. “You were right, I know you were right, I just… it was completely out of my hands after a while.”

“It isn’t just you, Y/N,” Haibara says in a soft voice, “Kento has always been like this. He’s not interested in anything but work. He’s a novice in that regard, so don’t cry so hard for a dork.”

“I understand,” you croak, “but I didn’t even get to properly confess. He didn’t get to hear my piece, but was actually happy in believing it was a lie. He sighed like the weight of the world was now off his shoulders!” You brought a hand to your chest, feeling your breathing go unsteady.

A desperate sigh comes through the phone. “Kento has been like this since we were younger. He has never been interested in anything else but getting good grades and working,” Haibara says quietly. You could hear him typing away on his computer. “But… honestly, you are the first person to ever get something different from Kento.”

“Hm?” Tears began drying from curiosity.

“This isn’t to get your hopes high or nothin’, but he has never had a woman as an assistant,” Haibara notes. “Before you, it was me until I got promoted. Then, it was just a few of the other guys within our department helping out upon Kento’s request. He continuously rejected female assistants in the past. So that’s when Takada shacho decided to force an assistant on him: you.”

“R-right,” you hum, “that’s when I was transferred from Sales to Finance.”

“Correct. Kento wasn’t… super happy about it, but Takada sang your praise,” Haibara continues. “And I guess whatever you did truly changed something. Kento would never let anybody drop honorifics on him. The most I’ve ever seen him smile is with you. He’s noticeably more patient and willing with you than anybody else in our department– not even me!”

You giggle weakly at his playful envy, “I think you’re giving me too much credit. We work closely together, so of course he’s going to be nice to me.”

“Sure, but he’s never been open to being addressed casually,” Haibara argues, “he also always used to prefer eating by himself during his lunch time. He would have never let me leave early today. I could be on the floor dying, and he’d just tell me to suck it up and calculate numbers.”

“It’s because you suck at your job, Yu,” you joke.

“I do not!”

“You totally do.”

“Anyways!” He huffs. “Point is, you’re definitely different. He may not share the same feelings as you, but you’ve definitely left an impact on him.”

You let out a sigh. Haibara was right from the start, and truly, it wasn’t even Nanami’s fault. You broke your own heart the day you decided to pursue your crush on him. He’s infamous for being disinterested in anything besides work, and you’ve witnessed the proof since your transfer. Perhaps you looked beyond his consideration, seeing it through rose colored lenses.

But if Haibara has noticed these changes in Nanami, then maybe you weren't just an assistant to him.

Don't bring your hopes up, though, chimed Haibara's voice in your head.

You lay on your back, an arm covering your eyes in embarrassment, “I’m so lame.”

Haibara chuckles, “you’re not lame, don’t start with that–”

You eye around your ceiling upon Haibara’s sudden silence. “Yu?” You chime. “Are you there?”

“Let me call you back,” Haibara says before the call ends. You let the phone slide from your hold, your body melting deeper into your bed. It didn't fix your broken heart, but Haibara's words definitely lifted your spirits a bit.

Haibara's mischievous smile took center stage of his face. He pulled back his dark locks, leaning comfortably into the back of his seat. With both earbuds on, he accepted the video call coming from the man himself.

"Haibara," Nanami begins quietly. Haibara could tell he seemed a bit off, as he wasn't exactly looking at him but rather something else on the lower right of his screen. "I have a question."

"I may have an answer," Haibara replied, "what's up?"

"Has... Y/N recently addressed you differently?" Haibara's eyes widen from Nanami's hesitance in his question. His mind was quickly trying to put 2 and 2 together.

"Differently how?"

"As in, using your name with honorifics," Nanami spewed out, his voice still quite reticent.

"Man, Y/N hasn't used any honorifics since we met honestly," Haibara recounts, "so if recently means ages ago, then sure. What, did she address you as 'kacho'?"

"Yes, she did," Nanami immediately lets out, almost with a touch of torment in his tone. "This morning, before I let her take the rest of the day off, she called me kacho."

Haibara pressed his hand against his lips, trying desperately not to laugh. This is new. "I mean, she used to call you by that for a while when she first became your assistant, no? It's not shocking if she occasionally says it."

"She hasn't said it since her first month as my assistant," Nanami informs. "Why would she start saying it again after we've stopped?"

Haibara shrugs, with a grin threatening to dance at his lips, "who's to say? Did anything happen when you went over to her place yesterday?" Haibara knew, but he enjoyed toying with Nanami's aloofness.

"Nothing noteworthy, I'd say," Nanami begins, genuinely mindless. But his face then expresses a moment of pensiveness. "Well, we worked but she was surprisingly much more quieter than usual. She also didn't finish her breakfast, and went on the rest of the day without eating anything else. I even offered to buy her something."

"That's not like Y/N at all," Haibara comments in a murmur, "if it was me, she'd make me buy her breakfast, post-breakfast, pre-lunch, lunch, and dinner."

"What is post-breakfast?" Nanami asks with confusion in his furrowed brows. He was also curious about the depth of your relationship with Haibara, but that was for another time.

"I'm making a joke," Haibara whisks back to the conversation. "Did she address you as kacho yesterday?"

"No," Nanami quickly recalls, "in fact, she didn't really say my name much since I got to her house."

This is getting too good. Messing with Nanami like this is rare, and Haibara lives for it. "Does it bother you that she's been calling you kacho?" Haibara found himself sitting up straight when he noticed the uncomfortable look on Nanami's face. His question made Nanami feel unsettled for some reason.

"I don't think it bothers me per say," Nanami begins, his eyes still distantly looking elsewhere. "It's just a bit weird that she's been addressing me as such again. It came out of nowhere."

"You're literally her boss," Haibara pointed out dully, "just because you two are more casual doesn't eliminate the fact that you're the one who signs off her payroll."

"W-well, yes, but we've long established that we can be casual within our platonic work relationship," Nanami says in his matter-of-fact voice. "It feels as though our work relationship has changed a bit. It makes me wonder if it was a good idea to go to her house."

"Did you make a mess of her house?"

"No."

"Did you offend her?"

"I don't believe so."

"So why does it feel like it changed?" Haibara inquired strategically. He knew the answer, of course, as he was the first person you confided in. But fishing it out of Nanami would be more insightful, and more hilarious.

"Well, I..." Nanami begins, bringing a hand to the back of his head. "I may have mentioned something that I shouldn't have heard, nor repeated to anyone-- less so, to her."

"Hm?" Haibara hums for him to continue.

Nanami hesitates, but remembers that it's Haibara he was speaking to. His long time, childhood friend turned most trusted coworker. "I overheard two of our colleagues talk about Y/N... having certain feelings for me."

"What, like a crush?" Haibara helped him. Nanami finally meets Haibara's eyes and nods slowly. "Well, what did she say?"

"Well she concurred that it was just a silly rumor," Nanami coos, "it was extremely relieving to know that those rumors were not true at all. After that, we both got swept with work."

"Kento, you are the weirdest man I know," Haibara leans back in his seat again, resting his face in his hand. "Anyhow, better that she doesn't have feelings for you, right? Maybe they meant to say that she has a crush on someone else?"

"Oh no, they were very specific on the fact that she is my assistant, which would explain why she could have developed feelings for me," Nanami quickly defends. "Even then, who else would she have a crush on?"

"O-hoh! Cocky, are we?" Haibara blurts out. "Y'know, you're not the only bachelor in our department."

"Of course not," Nanami quickly remedies, "but I do believe that Y/N and I are very similar. We're both single and dedicate ourselves to work. I'm sure we both have the same view on dating coworkers, too."

"You two aren't the same person, though," Haibara points out. "You think she's like you, but you don't know that for certain. It's like accepting nobody's home without even trying to knock the front door."

"Quite the analogy," Nanami responds dully, "very profound."

"Listen, my point is you're accepting something as fact before you ask," Haibara urges, "what if she doesn't mind dating a coworker?"

"Then I'd be severely disappointed," Nanami puts simply, "she's bright. It would be a shame if she risks her career by pursuing love in our office."

"Who's to say?" Haibara mutters, giving up on the conversation. To argue with Nanami this early is to lose a few years in ones lifespan. "Lets not talk about this anymore, yeah? What was the reason for your call?" Haibara didn't want to admit it, but he was actually a bit annoyed by his friend.

"A-ah, right," Nanami exclaims, falling back into his usual sharp, calm demeanor. "It's to discuss our game plan for Monday, if you have the time to pencil this conversation in."

"Go on," Haibara sighs, giving him the green light. He didn't get everything he wanted to within this conversation, but it definitely gave him some insight in his dear friends mind. It was clear that you weren't just some person to Nanami. But to what extent was the mystery that Haibara was more than happy to figure out.

Taglist:

@blossomedfloweroflove @numblytemporary @everyoneandtheirmothers @animechick555 @inthedarkshadows000

@m-arj-1 @julk4e @hadassery @swoozleee @angxlsatvrn

@v1x3n @s-witch-bitch @furgusonn @watyousayin @thechaoticarchivist

@simp-manhwa @5sos-wdw @ffyona1214 @phantombaby @evangel44xxcds

@ukiyodestiny @jasminelee324 @eurydxceorphxus

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen nanami #jujutsu nanami #kento nanami #nanami smut #jjk nanami #nanami x reader #nanami kento

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violetflowers55 · 6 months ago

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Hot & Cold - Chapter 7

Synopsis: You return with the team to Pokolistan, only to end up with the whole Pokolistani army hunting you. You and Phosphorus run together, killing soldiers and hiding in dumpsters. Winding up at a little girls house, you end up learning more about his past.

Notes: Slower chapter, no smut, just relationship building and a tiny bit of angst. Also I think next chapter will be the last one! Hoping to get it out by monday night at the latest.

CW: Violence and death, discussion of his past

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Waller at least let you change out of your scratchy prison clothes before dragging you back to the tarmac. The rest of the team was already there waiting, except for Flag. A bit odd, but at least you wouldn’t have to deal with him banging on your door to wake you up again. The five of you loaded up into the plane and headed off to Pokolistan.

“Are you two ok?” Nina asked, “I saw what happened in the cafeteria.”

“More importantly, are you going to be able to fight with that thing wrapped around you arm?” The Bride said, pointing to Phosphorus’s injured arm.

“I’m touched by your concern,” he said sarcastically, “but I’m fine. More than fine really, just ask Y/N.”

“Hey!” you exclaimed, swatting at his leg. The Bride looked at you, putting the pieces together.

“Ugh, did not need to know that.”

“What? What did they-“ Nina asked before finally putting it together, “Oh, gross! How does that- how could you even- you know what, I don’t even want to know.”

You groaned, leaning your head back. Phosphorus laughed before returning to his magazine. A minute passed before The Bride spoke again.

“They want us to kill the princess”

“They want us to kill the person we just saved? Why?” you asked incredulously.

“Says it on a need to know basis.”

“And we don’t need to know,” Nina and The Bride finished. You bit your lip, pondering what possible reasons Waller could have for ordering the princess dead. Killing women randomly wasn’t really your thing.

“She must have a good reason, right?”

The Bride shrugged. “It’s one less human. That’s always a good reason.”

Unlike The Bride, you never saw the world through the lens of monsters versus humans. Maybe because most people didn’t know you were a monster until you had already decided to kill them. The more you thought about it, though, the more you started to see her point. No monster had ever hurt you the way humans had. Waller probably had a good reason for ordering you to kill the princess, but even if she didn’t, maybe The Bride was right.

The plane landed and you exited, only to pile into the car, getting squished between Nina and Phosphorus. It was a little hard to concentrate with his leg pressed against yours. As Alexi drove, he lightly brushed your thigh with his fingerprints. The lightness of his touch was comforting, reassuring.

Alexi’s phone rang. After a short conversation in Pokolistani, he hung up and changed directions, claiming there was traffic en route to the castle. The Bride looked back at you and Phosphorus, silently signaling to stay alert.

“What’s up Alexi?” The Bride asked as you got further and further away from the castle, “This isn’t- We’re leaving the city. The castle is that way.”

“Oh! It seems roundabout, but it’s good shortcut.”

She looked back at you and Phosphorus again. Something was up. Alexi pulled up to a chain-linked fence and stopped the car. He made up a lame excuse about the engine sounding funny, but a moment later, armored vehicles, choppers, and flying soldiers appeared in front of you.

“Damn it!” The Bride shouted.

“My men have fought and died for the princess. We are not going to let you kill her now,” he pointed a gun at the Bride’s head, “Stand down Bride. You-“

With a shout, Phosphorus cut him off, punching through the headrest and his skull. Blood squirted from his neck as his head toppled to the floor.

“What a shame. I liked that guy.”

Damn, why does he sound so sexy right after killing someone?

Preparing for a fight, you turned your skin to steel and preemptively readied your whip. The doors of the car swung open and Phosphorus pulled you out by your wrist. The two of you ran, dodging the hailstorm of bullets raining down on you. You ran through alleys until you ended up in one with a tank bearing down on you both. Phosphorus stripped his clothes off and handed them to you.

“I don’t think now’s really the time-“

“Dirty mind,” he teased, “Just watch.” He motioned to the tank to come to him.

Hot.

The gunmen atop fired at him, but Phosphorus exploded every bullet mid-air before they hit him. As the tank got closer, he roared, setting himself ablaze. The tank rolled over him, and his body cut through it like butter, flipping off the soldiers as they died. When the tank fully went through him, it exploded, illuminating him standing with his arms out wide.

HOT.

A lone soldier remained. He crawled towards you begging for his life. You smiled. Slipping off your boot, you pressed your foot in his face, slowly crushing his skull. His screams of agony were like music to your ears.

“Vicious. I like it,” Phosphorous remarked as he walked back over to you. Your cheeks flushed, and you knew it wasn’t because of the heat from the explosion.

A car with its sirens on passed on the street behind him. He redressed and grabbed your hand before running down more alleys. As the sun started to go down, you stopped by a dumpster.

“We can hide in here,” you whispered, pulling him into the dumpster and closing the lid.

It stunk. Something hard stuck your ass. The two of you were cramped together, folded in ways you didn’t know you could fold before. His body illuminated the darkness. You sat facing each other, your legs pressed together. Somehow, he made the stinky dumpster tolerable. He cocked his head to the side, looking at you, but said nothing. You didn’t either, knowing any sound could alert the soldiers.

The sounds of soldier footprints passed by the dumpster. Phosphorus gently lifted the lid to see two soldiers walking away and motioned for you to get out. You got out and saw both of you were littered with garbage. He gently picked the scraps off you before wiping away his own.

You continued moving and running until you reached a residential neighborhood. Helicopters flew overhead, using a spotlight to try to find you. Phosphorus darted to a house and burned through the doorknob, pulling you inside. Both of you left out a sigh of relief when the spotlight passed by the house. Looking around, you realized you were in some random family’s house.

Phosphorus stepped forward, inspecting their photos on the credenza. He picked up a photo of a man and a woman on their wedding day and stared at it, seemingly lost in thought. A little girl holding a blanket padded down the steps, standing at the bottom of the stairs.

“Phosphorous,” you whispered, trying to get his attention. He turned and looked at her.

“Gladen,” she said, her voice tiny and innocent, not caring about either of your appearances.

“Gladen? Hungry?” he asked.

She nodded and he headed towards the kitchen like he was in a trance. You followed, unsure of what he was doing. He rummaged through the cabinets until he found a bowl and a box of cereal. He poured her a bowl and sat across from her at the small dining table. The spoon clanged softly against the bowl as she ate.

“I really wish you wouldn’t’ve come out here. I don’t want to risk you telling anyone I was here,” he said to her. Worry that he was going to kill this little girl seeped into your bones.

“Alex, what are you doing?” you whispered again. He ignored you, transfixed by her.

“Skelet?” the girl said happily, pointing at him.

“Skelet. Yeah. Skeleton, that’s me.” he sounded tired, almost distraught.

“Priyatel skelet,” she continued, resting her head in her hand.

“Not sure what that means.”

She giggled and pulled her lips apart to show her teeth, imitating him. He let out a short laugh

“It looks like I’m smiling too. But I’m not.” You were starting to get very worried he was going to kill this girl.

“Alex, we should go,” you placed your hand on his shoulder, hoping physical contact would break him out of this weird trance.

He stood up silently and moved towards the back door. You followed, thankful this was finally ending. To your dismay, the girl followed him into the backyard too. She tugged on his pants and said something else to him in Pokolistan. He chuckled lightly and bent down, picking her up. He tossed her in the air and she spread her arms out like a plane. She shrieked and giggled; he laughed from real joy. You’d never seen him like this.

What the hell is he doing?

The back door slammed open. A man and a woman holding a bat stood there in shock. Noticing them, Phosphorus gently put the girl down. Still laughing, she ran into their arms

“Oh, I’m sorry, we were just…pretending to fly.”

You nervously smiled at the girl’s parents, trying to look non-threatening. Phosphorus stood up and straightened his coat.

“Would you folks mind telling us the way to the castle?”

Still in shock, the woman pointed towards it. Finally, you could leave. You headed in the direction she pointed, Phosphorus tailing behind you. Once you were safely in the woods, you spun on your heels to face him.

“What the hell was that?” you snapped, hands on your hips.

“What?” he asked. His voice was detached, like he was still back with that little girl.

“You and that girl - what the hell were thinking?!”

“I’m not doing this,” he groaned and tried to push past you, but you sidestepped to block him.

“You could’ve gotten us killed! Or captured! We’re about to go kill a princess, and I need to know where your head’s at, so yeah, we’re doing this.”

He paused, looking down at his shoes.

“She reminded me of my son,” he rasped, his voice full of pain.

“You-You have a son?” you gasped. You never would’ve imagined him as a father.

“Had. Had a son. And a wife.”

Your head spun. He had a wife? And a kid?

“Wha-“

“Rupert Thorne killed them,” he answered your incomplete question, “and then he tried to kill me. So I killed him and his whole family. And that little girl reminded me of them.”

He finally looked at you. Your mouth hung open in shock.

“So, can we go now?” he asked, irritated.

“I’m sorry,” you said softly, moving to touch his arms. You were sorry about his family and that you pushed him to tell you. All you wanted to do now was comfort him. He stepped back and your arms fell back to your sides.

“Let’s just go,” he mumbled, walking past you. You followed and silently prayed that he wouldn’t hold this against you.

At the top of the hill, you ran into Weasel, Nina, and The Bride. The castle loomed in front of you, the sun rising behind it.

“Let’s go kill a princess.”

#creature commandos #creature commandos fanfic #dr phosphorus #dr. phosphorus fanfic #dr. phosphorus x reader #x reader creature commandos #dr phosphorus x reader #dr. phosphorus #fanfic

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drunkenlionwrites · 2 months ago

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Beneath the Willow's Crown

Part 1: The Mavka's Crown Part 2

Pairing: mer!Vash the Stampede x reader, monster x reader, fae x reader Summary: During Rusalny Week, you are crowned as the "mermaid" and paraded to the lake in a night of ancient rites, bonfire, and songs.

Warnings: sfw for now, female reader, misogyny, ancient rites, folklore, loneliness and feelings of isolation, mentions of christianity

Word Count: 1,4 k Author's note: mavka, rusalka - all means a mermaid, I will use it in further chapters interchangeably. In slavic folklore they are a bit different from mermaids - without the fishtails and not only water-bound, they are more akin to fae creatures from western European folklore. They can live in forests, fields and grasslands. Here I decided to make mavkas bound to the local lake and forest. I am very very proud of how it is turning out, so I hope you enjoy it. Can be read as a standalone monster x reader story.

They drape the willow branches over your shoulders, weave wildflowers through your hair, and call it an honor. Fingers pluck at your hair, clumsy and rough, threading stems and flowers with little care for how the twigs scratch your scalp. You sit still, hands limp in your lap, as rough fingers twist vines around your wrists and ankles. You smell the sweet rot of them - earth-heavy, river-wet, and wonder if anyone else notices how the petals wilt as soon as they touch your skin. It's the first Thursday after Pentecost - the mermaid’s Easter.

You are to be the Mavka tonight.

The village's offering. Now you must make sure you appease them so that the whole village is safe till next year. That your fields are rich with rye. That your homes are blessed with mavkas’ protection.

The prettiest girl, they say - and smile at you with too many teeth, patting your head as if it’s something to be proud of.

But you know why they chose you. You hear their whispers when they think you aren't listening. "Strange girl." "Dreamy girl." "Poor family, having her as an only child."

You were never truly one of them.

Your father's hand was heavy on your small shoulder, guiding you through the underbrush. The woods had seemed endless then - towering trees and rivers that sang in languages you couldn't understand. You had loved it, every moment of it - the wet loam beneath your boots, the way the light dappled like gold coins through the leaves.

And then… The crack of a rifle. The sharp, clean smell of blood on the air.

You had knelt in the ferns beside a fallen deer, no more than a yearling, its breath already fading.

You cried for it, cradling its still-warm head in your arms, your tears carving clean tracks through the dirt on your cheeks.

Your father had stared down at you, bewildered. "It's just the way of things," he said gruffly. “Stupid child,spilling tears over thing that will keep your belly full. Too bad you don’t have brothers.”

But you never forgot.

The way the woods seemed to sigh as the creature's life drained into the earth. The way the river ran slower that day, as if mourning with you.

They tighten the last wreath around your forehead, the stems scratching against your scalp. It’s pretty though – much lusher and more intricate than any other. You made it the night before.

You do not protest.

It wouldn’t matter if you did, you think. You are their doll tonight.

The crowd gathers outside - the whole village, wearing their best, drinking and laughing and pretending they aren't afraid. The air tastes of woodsmoke and damp grass. Children shriek and weave through the crowd. Men jostle one another, smelling of sweat and homebrew.

The white shirts of the girls flash like ghost lights under the moon - hair unbraided, feet bare, wreaths bobbing with every step.

You’re seventeen.

Tomorrow, you knew, Halyna would be hosting the girls at her house. A proper gathering - a day of embroidery, of chattering, of laughing over half-finished hems and spilled stewpots. Later, the boys would come.

They would lean against the doorframes, pass around jugs of homebrew alcohol, offer sly smiles to the girls who giggled and tossed their braids. It was expected — the way things moved.

Needles and thread by day. Flirting and dancing by night. And maybe, if the shadows grew deep enough, wandering hands in the haylofts, hurried whispers behind the barns.That was the way the world was supposed to unfold for you.

A tidy, stitched-together life. Dinner on the stove, a husband at the table, children at your feet and every corner of your house. Halyna had pressed your hands in hers after church, her brown eyes bright with excitement.

"You'll come, won’t you?" she asked. "It’ll be fun. You'll see."

You had smiled - the polite, brittle smile you had learned to wear - and promised you would try.

But that night, instead of darning your best shirt, you had wandered down to the lake.

The stars had shivered on the black surface. The willows had whispered secrets only you cared enough to hear. You sat barefoot on the muddy bank, the cool water kissing your toes, and watched the moon carve silver paths across the reeds.

It was better this way. You haven’t been invited since, to your parents’ dismay.

Someone snaps their fingers before your face, jolting you back.

"Smile, girl," a woman says, voice sharp but not unkind.

You bare your teeth in something that passes for a grin.

You are clothed in a simple white shirt, cinched at the waist with a red woven belt, a heavy beaded necklace clinking softly against your chest.

As soon as the moon rises - pale and full over the fields - the girls separate from the rest of the crowd and gather together, unbraided hair spilling down their backs, wreaths of flowers on every head.

You walk at the front - the "mermaid," chosen for your beauty, your slenderness, your strangeness.

You remember, too, the way your mother frowned when she heard you'd been chosen this year.

Her mouth had gone tight, her fingers tightening around the cross at her neck.

"You’ll make a mockery of yourself," she muttered, voice low, angry. "This is heathenry. Devil’s work, parading around like a spirit."

You had tried to laugh it off: "It's just tradition, Mama. It's only games."

But she hadn't smiled.

Her faith was a hard, narrow thing - newer than the river and the woods, but no less fierce. To her, the old rites were poison, rot clinging to the bones of the village.

You had worn the wreath anyway.

You had walked to the river anyway.

Because somewhere, deep down, you had always known: You belonged more to the wild things than to the church steps.

Behind you, the girls link arms, pairs lifting and lowering, forming living gates. They pass beneath one another, singing songs too old for any of them to remember fully.

The night hums with their voices - soft, eerie mermaid songs - songs of longing, songs of danger, songs to appease what stirs in the lake and the woods.

They light a bonfire, the flames licking at the sky. Girls leap over the fire, shrieking with laughter, daring the spirits to follow.

Boys join in, lingering at the edges. Some girls toss their wreaths toward the boys, laughing and fleeing, the boys giving half-hearted chase.

The "mermaid" - you - must chase one of the girls in return, trying to catch and tickle her, a ritual echo of the spirits who drag the living into the waters.

At midnight, they say, the real mavkas and rusalkas will walk the earth - freed from the lake's hold until the next mermaid’s Easter. And tonight, you are their proxy.

You think about the herbs you slipped into your belt this morning - A sprig of wormwood, the bitter smell clinging to your fingers. Lovage, tucked into the folds of your shirt.

Yevshan-zillia. The old women say it keeps the mavkas at bay. That they can’t take you if you carry it.

You wonder if it’s true. You wonder if you even want it to be.

You drift now, the bonfire’s heat washing over your skin, the wet grass clinging to your feet. The songs rise louder, harsher - voices cracking as the night wears thin. Someone grabs your hand - you think it's Olena - spinning you in a dizzy circle until you are laughing too, your crown sliding sideways. For a moment, you forget. You let yourself be young, alive, glowing under the hollowed-out moon.

But when you stumble free of the circle, breathless, heart hammering - You feel it.

The woods are watching.

The lake holds its breath.

Something ancient shifts in the darkness beyond the firelight.

You turn your head, wreath askew, strands of hair sticking to your damp face - And though there is nothing there, your skin prickles.

#vash x reader #trigun x reader #vash x you #trigun x you #vash the stampede #trigun #vash headcanons #fae x reader #monster x reader #teratophillia #monster boyfriend #monster lover #mermay 2025 #mermay

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atlasofthestaars · 2 years ago

Note

I can’t tell if your requests are open or not, so i’m sorry if they aren’t and just disregard this <3 Can I request ANYTHING with MK1 Bi-han, i’m down ASTRONOMICAL for him. if you want me to get specific something where he’s learning how to be affectionate and (ironically) less cold with you 😭 to me it seems like he’d be more of a physical touch/actions kind of person, even though that may be few and far between especially at first. also can i just say you’re the best mk writer i’ve seen ♥️

NOTE: They are! I just struggle with writing them sometimes, so I’m MUCH slower at making them than my New Era chapters, but they are!

<3 Thank you for requesting and being so lovely <3 Sorry for how long the wait was! I kinda treated this like a character study + my headcanons for the man.

Also I couldn’t tell if this was s/o or not so I just defaulted to crush?

The fic is set to be kinda ? told in his POV, but in second still. You’ll see! Also I kindaa got carried away at the end so maybe ??? a bit ooc. I just like writing people pining.

FOR YOU [SUB ZERO X READER]

Doing small things for others' convenience was not something Bi-Han was used to doing, nor was he known for doing these things.

“Get up.” Bi-Han stood over you, from where he had swept you and sent you tumbling to the floor. There were a few moments of silence as he watched you hesitate, staring up to him bewildered. Why were you confused? The command was simple enough. You stared at his hand, seeming lost in thought. He rolled his eyes.

How was this the person who could go toe to toe with him?

“Are you deaf?” He asked you, his stare turning into an icy glare.

Why did you look so lost?

Sure, he had never helped you off the ground before, Bi-Han could give you that. The reasons behind this was simple, he was just simply tired of hearing his brothers nag him for leaving you on the floor. It’s not like he helped any others up during sparring. They were capable of getting up themselves, they did not need their grandmaster to coddle them.

Just because he’s known you for a while, why should you be the exception?

Still, their complaints were tiring and bothersome, so he decided to try to help you up for once. Maybe that would settle their complaints. They were always pushing him to be a little less…icy. Plus, out of anyone, he supposed doing this for you would not be the worst. Sure, you tried to hang around him constantly, but your company wasn’t unpleasant he supposed.

Bi-Han growled as he watched you still lay on the ground, staring at his hand. With a huff, he lunged forward, grabbing your hand for himself. He was going to help you up one way or another, dammit. You were not going to be the person to deny his kindness. Hoisting you up, he was caught off guard as you collided with his chest.

Did he hit you so hard during training that you were acting dumb all of a sudden?

With a grunt, he steadied you, holding you by your waist. His hands settled quite nicely there, and his hands instinctively squeezed. Your hands were on his chest, as you righted yourself properly. He sent you another glare, this one more instinctual than intentional. You seemed caught off guard, confused, and so many things all at once.

You were confusing.

What was even more confusing was the fact that his mind seemed to want to capture this moment, wanting to sear the memory of you being in his arms permanently in his head. His hands twitched, and his lips pursed at the thoughts that invaded his head. He pushed them away, shooing them away like annoying flies.

A grandmaster should not be plagued by such…odd thoughts.

He sighed as he let go of your waist once you seemed steady enough. You shot him that sunny grin of yours, and commented on how his heart was finally defrosting. It seemed that you finally had your senses back. In return, Sub Zero frowned as he crossed his arms. You always had a knack for trying to make puns out of his powers. Still, despite the disapproving looks he always sent you, you never stopped.

Bi-Han wasn’t sure to think of you as brave for not caring for his warning glares, or stupid for ignoring them. He was inclined to think of the latter. Would you so brazenly ignore a wolf staring you down with predatory eyes? And yet, a small voice in his head told him otherwise.

He didn’t quite like nor agree with the voice. Honestly, he didn’t even know what to make of the voice in the first place.

“Satisfactory job for today.” Bi-Han said, and he felt a strange sense of satisfaction as you beamed at his words. You were always too eager to accept any positive words from him. You gave his shoulder a pat and scampered off, probably to eat since it was around dinner time now.

He stood there for a bit longer, watching you disappear, and watching the place you last were before you turned the corner. He frowned as he realized he had been staring. How ridiculous, why had he been staring? With a grunt, he turned around and stalked off to his office.

He couldn’t get the feel of your hand out of his head, no matter how hard he tried.

Bi-Han was not known for little acts of kindness.

“You need to eat.” Bi-Han scolded you, shoving a bowl full of food in your hands. Your fingers brushed, and he pursed his lips, not knowing what to make of the tingle it left on his skin. He’s been more oddly aware of his skin whenever he was around you lately, and he wasn’t quite sure why.

He watched as that stupid confused look overcame your face again as you took it. It always happened whenever he did things like this, but never with anyone else. He felt a bit offended every time. It wasn’t as if he was incapable of kindness. It didn’t sit right with him the idea that you thought he was incapable of it. You looked at him, opening your mouth to speak, but he cut you off.

“You didn’t eat breakfast this morning.” He mentioned, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Which it was. Anyone, if they were paying even a smidge of attention to you, would notice how you failed to eat this morning. It actually has been a few days since you’ve eaten breakfast, leading to you complaining and being famished by lunchtime. It had begun to bother him.

Was it just him who noticed these things about you? You even seemed surprised by the information he told you.

How foolish.

“Did you make this?” You asked, peering at the food as you prodded the rice congee with the spoon. Bi-Han nodded, and he felt a strange fluttery feeling in his chest as you took a bite and hummed in delight. You were too pleased by this simple cooking, this was a meal that a child was capable of making. He didn’t like how he craved more of your approval. “This is really good! Thanks Bi-Han!”

Your praise made him feel content. Much to his chagrin, Bi-Han felt his mind churn out some ideas. How would you react if he made you something special instead of this simple breakfast? Certainly you would be more impressed, why shouldn’t you be? His cooking was sufficient. Maybe you’d even praise him more.

Maybe he should make you some more food, sometime.

“You should be eating breakfast, it’s stupid to skip meals.” The cyromancer continued to berate you with a frown. He didn’t like the idea of you skipping meals, it felt…wrong. He watched as you, through a mouthful of food, tried to excuse yourself. He sent you a glare. “There are no excuses. Even a child knows not to skip a meal.”

“But-”

“I just said no excuses.” Bi-Han said, shutting you down with a tone of finality. You sent him a sheepish look, one that told him that you were honestly, and truly sorry. You didn’t have any malice behind your actions, at least. He sighed, leaning forward to meet your gaze. “Just so you don’t go running around without at least some food in your stomach, I’ll make you breakfast.”

“Really?” You said. You blinked in surprise, and he nodded. You smiled at him, and he closed his eyes, ignoring how his mind wanted to save that imagery. “I’d like that a lot Bi-Han, thank you.” He nodded, opening his eyes to send you a small glare as he ignored the flutter in his chest.

“You need to wake up earlier though, so you have time to eat.”

“That’s worth it.”

Bi-Han was not known for letting others close to him.

“Hold still!”

You swatted his shoulder, huffing as you glared at him. Your confidence around the grandmaster was almost astounding to the rest of the Lin Kuei. Not many would not even think of glaring at the man, let alone swat his shoulder in annoyance. And yet, here you were, doing just that. The oddest part of it all was that Bi-Han was letting you.

Well, more like tolerating you.

Your efforts were not without some push back from Bi-Han. You received your fair share of glares, huffs, and scoffs. And yet, you ignored all of those. The glares he sent your way were deflected, as if they were mere stares. His huffs and scoffs were like entertainment to you. He watched as your grin grew whenever he did these.

When did you stop fearing his intimidating presence?

Did you ever fear him in the first place?

Bi-Han was left brooding as you tended to his wounds. He felt like a sheltered, pampered dog with a person who fussed far too much over him. His lips pulled into a frown as you pulled his arm into place, making sure to grip it tightly so he could not move and mess up your delicate work.

“I’m trying to stay still.” Bi-Han grumbled, his voice sounded resigned as he let the arm you worked on go limp. He had learned well enough from your previous efforts that resistance was futile. You would probably chase him down to the ends of the earth to dress his wounds. The thought alone seemed ridiculous.

Then again, it was you. And he wasn’t sure when he stopped minding it when it was you.

“Well, try harder!” You sassed, rolling your eyes. The grandmaster kept his eyes on yours, finding them more interesting than anything else in the room. No, he was not fawning over your eyes. Such a notion was unfounded. He simply didn’t think anything else was interesting.

That’s it. That’s all.

Your eyes were simply just more interesting than the same old training rooms he’s known since he could remember. Honestly, most things were. But your eyes were especially a standout. They held a certain quality to them. A warmth that could not be replicated, not even by his younger brother’s pyromancy. No, it was unique. Something he couldn’t quite place.

Bi-Han felt his breath catch as your eyes, the ones he definitely did not find fascinating, met his own eyes. You certainly had to have some sort of magic within your blood. It was impossible that you didn’t in some capacity. After all, why would he be unable to look away if that wasn’t the case?

“What?” Bi-Han asked, his voice rumbling as he continued to look at those strange eyes of yours. He watched as they narrowed once again at him, like he did something wrong. He couldn’t have, though, all he did was stare at you. And you never once complained about it.

“Did you even hear what I said?” You nagged. Realization trickled in, and Bi-Han’s first instinct was to frown. He most certainly did not hear what you said. It wasn’t his fault though. He was far more focused on trying to figure out your eyes than to hear whatever you had been going on about.

Not that he disliked your voice. It was nowhere near ear splitting and headache inducing. He’d never admit it, but it was the complete opposite of that. And by complete opposite, he meant it was tolerable. Nothing more, nothing less.

Seriously.

“No.” Bi-Han bluntly replied, knowing that you’d chew him out if he even bothered to lie. You seemed to read him better than he could read you. It was a bit frustrating. He wasn’t exactly an open book, yet you made him feel like one. Meanwhile, you were open with almost everything and almost everyone. So why could he not figure you out?

“I said you need to be more careful.” You repeated, an exhausted tone in your voice. He frowned, both at your insistence and your condition. Have you been skipping out on sleep again? After searching your face, he determined that no, you were just exhausted by him.

“I am careful.” He retaliated, dropping his gaze to look down at his hands. They were clasped together as he hunched over. He detested the way his mind started to drift back to thoughts of you again. How would your hand fit in his? Were your hands soft and gentle? Or were they rough and calloused like his? Were they warm? Cold?

Why did he always think of you?

“Clearly, you’re not careful enough.” You nagged. For emphasis, you tightened the bandage you were wrapping around his bicep. He should not like the fact that you were concerned over him. He didn’t need you to be concerned over him. “Honestly, for being grandmaster of the Lin Kuei, I thought you’d be more careful.” You muttered.

Bi-Han sent a half hearted glare your way, being met with one of the same intensity. He couldn’t even muster up a retort to send your way. It was just because he knew you wouldn’t care whatever harsh comment he had. That’s it.

His mind fixated on the gentle way you smoothed out the bandages. Your fingers tracing over his muscles such care that was foreign to the cryomancer. It felt…domestic. His heart skipped a beat at the idea of a domestic life.

Since when did he crave for those kinds of things?

“Someday I might not be here to patch up your wounds.” You threatened, but both he and you knew it was a half hearted lie. You would always be there to bother Bi-Han. Whether it be to nag him, make stupid jokes, or just to…be there.

He’s grown soft, he realized, if he’s actually grown to tolerate you and your presence without too much thought. Looking back, the man realized that, he’s actually grown to be used to you being with him for a while now. This realization would have made the man angry or terrified long ago.

Now he was just…okay with it.

And so Bi-Han sat there, with the overwhelming realization that he’s grown to trust you.

Bi-Han was not known for being vulnerable.

The grandmaster of the Lin Kuei, as much as he would never admit it, is very much human.

He had dreams. Dreams of ascending to higher things than just being a member of a clan that listened to a god to a drop of a hat. He had aspirations of growing stronger and better than he was now. He had flaws, much like any other person. He was ambitious to a fault and was too harsh and blunt, even to his own kin.

But most of all, Bi-Han felt weaknesses.

It wasn’t often, but he sometimes thought of his parents.

Bi-Han’s relationship with his father was strained. To be the firstborn of a clan that was so revered meant he had a lot of expectations on him since he was born. He had to command respect without being harsh. He had to be confident, but not cocky. He had to give up who he was, or wanted to be, for the clan. Because Bi-han was now the clan’s life blood.

The cyromancer never asked for such a destiny. But who was he to deny a path to power since birth? He supposed it was only worthy of him, as he rose to the challenge when he knew many would crumble under the immense pressure. He alone withstood the harshness of his father’s teachings when others did not see that side of him.

No one else had to see the sheer disappointment in his father’s eyes everytime he did not live up to his expectations.

It was suffice to say his father expected much of him. Bi-Han, after all, was going to inherit a lot of power and responsibility. It was only fair. Still, bitterly, the cyromancer remembered how much easier his brothers’ expectations were. But it was fine. It was not as if they were trained to be the next grandmaster of a clan.

It was probably for the better, for now he was a man who could hold his own.

Still, sometimes he wished, deep down, that he had a father instead of a teacher.

Bi-Han’s relationship with his mother was better. Where his father surmounted a lot of pressure upon his son to forge him into a diamond, his mother took care and time to polish him. The man was ever thankful for and adored his mother.

When father had been harsh, she had always been there to provide guiding words to help quell his fears. She gave him compassion and kindness in his times of need. His mother had always been proud of him, even when he felt as if he fell short.

Bi-Han had been hit the hardest by his mother’s death.

Tonight was one of those nights where his weaknesses managed to snag their claws into him and tear at his chest. Lying down on his bed, he stared up towards the ceiling. It was dark in his room. He preferred it that way. But the cover of darkness did not help his mind as he looked into the inky black darkness.

Though he did not feel the chill of his own powers, he knew that the temperature in his room was dropping quickly due to his lack of self control. He should have better control than this. The old man would despise this as much as he despised him.

He needed water. Water would help him get back into the right mindset.

Bi-Han trudged towards the kitchen, a layer of frost following in his wake. Thoughts of the parents he no longer had filled his mind as he went, trying to drag him down. Shards of ice born from his irritation grew on his forearms.

Why were the dead haunting him so much?

It was irrational for him to allow them to have such a chokehold on his thoughts, even after all this time. The cyromancer owed them nothing. He had no need for them to whisper into his mind, telling him how he needed to be more than he was now. How Bi-Han was still not enough,

The knob on the kitchen grew icy as he gripped it. Fragile shards dropped as he turned, shattering like glass on the floor. His steps felt like molasses as he walked towards the sink. The glass he grabbed immediately grew cold, almost threatening to shatter in his hands.

He glared at the sink as it refused to relinquish the water he desperately needed. Bi-Han felt his frustration grow, and he clenched his fists. He trembled and shook from anger. He was the grandmaster, dammit! He should not be struggling with any of this.

The glass shattered in his hand.

“Bi-Han?” A voice rang out amongst the whispers in his head. He froze, the ice on his hands sticking to the sink like his father’s teachings stuck to him. Like a cornered animal, Sub Zero’s head whipped around and he glared instinctively at the intruder.

It was you.

You stood in the doorway, eyes wide as you looked at the mess that was Bi-Han. He cringed inwardly, detesting how you saw him at his lowest. Slowly, you stepped into the room, looking at the shards of ice and the frost that had overtaken the room.

“Are you okay?” You asked, now in front of Bi-Han. Instead of the fear he had imagined in your eyes, you only showed concern. Slowly, you reached out a hand to cradle his now bleeding hand. You examined his hands, taking out the bandages you seemed to always carry for his sake and began to patch him just like you always did.

The words Bi-Han wanted to say caught in his throat as he stared at you. He was bewildered. Why were you not running? Why were you still here? It was illogical for you to be staying here when he was like…this.

“I saw all the ice.” You said, your voice gentle and soft. It soothed the pain. It silenced the whispers in his head. “I was worried for you.” You murmured, your gaze focused on his hand that you held so carefully, as if it would break if you breathed too hard.

Normally, he hated being treated lesser than he was. But he knew with you, that wasn’t the case here.

“Sorry if I’m overstepping but…” You said. You paused, uncertain over something. Then, slowly you wrapped your arms around him, giving him a warm gentle embrace. For a moment, Bi-Han stood there stiffly, not knowing what to do. This type of affection was lost to him.

Slowly, though, he wrapped his arms around you too.

And he sobbed into your shoulder.

Bi-Han, most of all, was not known for being soft.

Standing outside in the garden, you stood by his side. You always seemed to find your way there. Bi-Han could not think of a better place he would rather you be. It only felt right that you were there, after everything you’ve been through with him.

The cyromancer glanced at you, letting out a breath as he saw the frost nip at your nose and cheeks making them flush. Bi-Han, in that moment, was jealous of the gentle snow and cold and how it brought the color to your cheeks.

It should be him.

If he made a light snowstorm like the one surrounding you both, would you look at him with even a fraction of the admiration he held for you? If he made an ice sculpture dedicated for you, would you swoon for him and fall into his arms?

No, none of those felt right.

He watched silently with thinly veiled admiration as you spread out your arms, embracing the cold weather. A large smile pulled at your lips, and it also pulled at his heart. The joy on your face was nearly infectious, and he had to fight to keep his lips from quirking up. And yet, if you were to open your eyes and look over, you would see the ghost of a smile on his lips.

No person should have this amount of control over another over a damned smile, and yet here you were. You were able to make the icy grandmaster smile without lifting a finger. All you had to do was to have to smile. By the Netherrealm, you could just look at him at this point and his heart would be jumping for joy.

You had him wrapped around your finger, did you know that?

No. Of course not. You were too oblivious to his feelings. If you did, you would and should be trying to hug him, and not the snowflakes that surrounded the both of you. So instead, Bi-Han just admired your all too perfect face, trying to commit the sight to memory.

By the elder gods, he really wanted to kiss you.

“Isn’t the snowfall just wonderful?” You asked, peeking open an eye to look at him. Bi-Han, snapping out of his stupor, crossed his arms like he guarded his heart. He paused, trying to think of something, anything.

What should he do? Should he try to flirt? No, knowing you, you’d probably laugh at his attempt and think he was trying to make a joke. That, and flirting wasn’t really his style anyways. That was something the arrogant actor would do, and he wanted you to fall for him, Bi-Han. Not Johnny Cage.

So instead he just nodded.

It seemed a sufficient enough answer for you. Your smile grew, and Bi-Han wondered for a moment if you were the embodiment of the sun. No, of course not. You were far more radiant than that stupid star, if anything, the universe should revolve around you.

His world already did, anyways.

“It’s nice to have something gentle for once, it’s usually a blizzard out here!” You exclaimed, and Bi-Han’s mind couldn’t help but to run in circles over your words. Did you prefer a gentleman? The ghost of a smile on his lips disappeared, replaced with his usual frown.

He wasn’t exactly a shining definition of a gentleman.

“Aw, you stopped smiling.” You pointed out, and Bi-Han’s heart skipped a beat. So you weren’t as oblivious as you seemed. You noticed his smile, and even seemed to mourn the loss of it. Did you like it? If he were better at it, he’d smile just for you. His lips pursed, and he suddenly wishes he could smile on command. He’s never wanted that before.

Bi-Han’s eyes wander, and they look towards you hair and the snowflakes that decorate it. You looked absolutely ethereal. It was like the universe was trying to set him up for failure. How could the universe decorate you just so…perfectly?

“Man, I should have brought gloves.” You complain. You bring up your hands, which were trembling slightly from the cold. You exhaled into them before rubbing them together to try and bring back some warmth into your body.

“Here.” Bi-Han said, and his body worked faster than his mind as he grabbed your hands. For a moment, he was pleased with himself. Then, in the next, he felt foolish. His hands were probably cold, what was he thinking? He stared at you, trying to gauge your reaction to his impulsive actions.

At first, it was shock. Then, that melted away into something that felt…bashful? Bi-Han’s heart skipped a beat, and he forced himself to engrave the look on your face into his brain. He never knew someone could look so breathtaking.

“Oh, thank you.” You said, your face becoming ever more flushed. The grandmaster’s heart swelled with pride and joy. He made you feel this way. Certainly that had to mean something, right? You bit your lip, and he couldn’t help but be entranced. How could someone have such kissable looking lips? “I…um…I need help with something else too…” You trailed off, swallowing as you nervously looked away.

“Hm?” Bi-han hummed, entranced by the usual shyness. He leaned ever closer, eyes searching your face. Whatever it is you wanted, he would give.

“My lips are cold too.” You managed to mumble out, before giving him the most hopeful smile he’s ever seen. Bi-Han’s lips grew into a soft smile as his stomach did backflips. He leaned forward, until his lips hovered just a breath away from yours.

“I can help with that.”

Then, he gave you a kiss.

Bi-Han was not known for doing small things for others, nor for his kindness. He never was known for letting others in or for vulnerability. And most of all, he was not known for his softness.

And yet, he’d be all of that and more, if it was for you.

#mk1 x reader #mortal kombat x reader #sub zero x reader #sub zero #bi han #bi han x reader #mk1 #mk1 2023 #mk #mortal kombat #mortal kombat fanworks #imagine #mortal kombat imagine #one shot #fluff

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kirain · 5 months ago

Text

Part four of my appreciation project!

@iedistis A fic based on their wonderful art piece here. Thank you for feeding the fandom!

Morning light streamed through the windows, painting the half-empty bed in molten gold. Dawn—Emmrich's favourite hour. Nothing compared to the thrill of waking beside his beloved, both of them messy and vulnerable from sleep's blessed embrace. It was an intimacy beyond words, a fragile moment reserved for them alone. As she stirred from her slumber, he stood before the mirror, adjusting the collar of his shirt, waiting—always waiting—for her.

Filomena. His anchor. His everything.

With a slow stretch, she slipped from the bed and stepped in front of him, her movements graceful, her gown ruffled and revealing. Raven-black hair cascaded over her shoulder as she reached for his neck pin, her fingers deft from weeks of practice. This small act of service had become something sacred between them, a silent devotion he anticipated each morning.

He ignored his reflection, instead watching her hands—her beautiful, delicate hands—as she fastened the chains, ensuring the skull clasp sat perfectly against his throat. The act was tender, seductive, and yet, unbearably distant. How he longed to reach for her, to caress her cheek, to break the quiet cadence of her gestures and return the devotion she so freely gave.

But as always, the moment she finished, she stepped away. And as always, he let her go.

It wasn't just him. She did this with everyone.

When Lucanis worried over Spite fleeing in the night, Filomena kept the spirit entertained until morning. When Bellara struggled to tune the artefact, Filomena listened, offering insights long past her own exhaustion. When Harding and Davrin doubted themselves, she was the first to lift them up. When Taash needed help appealing to their mother, she stood at their side. When Neve sought guidance on blood magic, Filomena answered every question, no matter how time-consuming or difficult.

But the worst was the battlefield. She was reckless—always throwing herself in front of others, always making sure no one else bore the brunt of the attacks. She carried everything.

Everything.

And today, as she finished with his pin, Emmrich saw it. In her hands—moving just a little slower. In her eyes—just a little heavier.

"Darling," he said softly. "Are you all right?"

Filomena blinked, the brief pause betraying her feelings before she mustered a well-worn smile. "Of course."

Emmrich winced. As she turned away, he caught her hand—not forcefully, but with quiet insistence.

"Truly?" he pushed, his voice gentle, persuasive. "I don't mean to pry. You've just seemed... distracted lately."

Filomena hesitated before slipping her fingers from his grasp, her gaze flicking away. Truly, he asked. A truth she couldn't speak to anyone, not even to him.

Truly, the weight of their looming battle against Ghilan'nain pressed down on her like a vice. The closer they drew to that moment, the more she feared not just failure, but leading them all to ruin.

"I'm just a little tired," she lied, forcing another placid smile. "Too much activity the last few days. It's been hell on my elegant features." Emmrich frowned at the obvious deflection, but she shrugged it off. "I'm going to read for a bit. Why don't you head downstairs and I'll meet you later?"

Emmrich sighed, concern knitting his brow as she moved towards the fireplace, feigning contentment. He could sense her pain, her facade, he just couldn't discern the cause.

"Filomena..."

"I'm fine, Emmrich," she stressed as she lowered herself onto the carpet in front of the divan, crossing her legs beneath her. "I'm sure Manfred probably put some tea on. Why don't you go wish him a good morning? I'll join you when I finish this chapter."

Emmrich watched as she grabbed the book of poetry that rested on the cushion behind her, left there from the night before. As she flipped it open, her fingers stilled over the pages, uninterested and unmoving. Even as she stared at the words, she wasn't reading. He could tell.

She wanted space, but he followed anyway, settling down on the divan and caging her within the warmth of his presence. Then, without a word, he reached forward, sweeping her silken hair behind her back.

Filomena flinched at the unexpected touch, her head tilting slightly. "What are you doing?"

"Your hair," he said, his lips curving into a small, knowing smile. "You like it braided, don't you?"

She froze, startled by the offer. "Yes, but I can do it myself."

His hands rushed to her shoulders, grasping them firmly yet gently. "I know you can," he hushed. "But I'd like to, if you'll let me."

A rare flush bloomed across her cheeks. "Do you... know how?"

"Of course. I learned during my years as a mortician."

She nearly laughed, but the weight on her heart smothered it before it could form. Instead, she simply scoffed, her gaze sinking into the fire's glow. With a weary nod, she set the book in her lap, an air of resignation in her tone.

"If you really want to," she relented.

"Thank you, darling."

He started carefully, his fingers weaving her thick, luscious strands with flawless precision. The sensation—his fingertips grazing her scalp, the steady pull and twist—was unexpectedly soothing.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked, the thought unbearable.

"No. It's—" Nice. "No, you're not hurting me."

The room went silent, save for the occasional pop of burning wood and the rhythmic glide of his hands.

"I know something's wrong," he said after a while. Filomena tensed, but he squeezed his legs tighter around her arms, his body her sanctuary. "You can talk to me about anything. You know that, yes?"

She didn't respond, her heart clenching.

"Darling, please."

The sincerity in his voice, the way he begged—it shattered her defenses. She swallowed hard, her gaze fixed on the hearth, the flames dancing with the freedom she yearned for.

For a long moment, she said nothing, until her voice emerged, low and abnormally diffident.

"I hate that I was put in charge."

Emmrich didn't react. He only listened, working her hair with patience.

"I didn't earn this," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "Varric left me in charge, and everyone just... follows. Not because I deserve it, but because they think they have to. 'If we don't fight the gods, who will?' So they joined at my request, never once questioning my reasons or qualifications." Her hands tightened over the book in her lap. "But I wasn't trained for this, Emmrich. I worry that—"

She cut herself off, unwilling to confess the worst of it.

She worried about making a fatal mistake.

She worried about leading him, Harding, Davrin—all of them—to their deaths.

"Well," she exhaled, ready to dismiss it, "I just worry sometimes. It's not worth discussing."

In her mind, she'd shared enough. She may have been Emmrich's partner, but she was his leader as well. He wasn't there to alleviate her doubts and insecurities. She turned a page, acting as though the conversation never occurred.

"I see," Emmrich hummed, tying off the braid with a black ribbon.

He sounded... relieved?

"That," he said, bending down, his breath a balm against her ear, "is absolute nonsense."

"What?"

Before she could turn, his lips brushed the side of her neck. Filomena stiffened, her breath hitching, but Emmrich persisted, shamelessly revelling in her scent. In her fleeting astonishment. He kissed lower, skimming her sensitive skin, his voice an affectionate murmur.

"No one follows you out of obligation, my love." Another kiss. "They follow you because you're capable." Another. "Because you're brilliant." Another. "Because you care."

His kisses trailed lower—sucking, nibbling—then back up, his moustache tickling her jaw.

"Emmrich..." Filomena shuddered.

He smiled against her, pressing another sensual kiss to her neck before gently turning her to face him. Their eyes met, and for a moment there was nothing but quiet understanding between them.

Then, his lips met hers, strong yet humble, aching with devotion. He cradled her chin, holding her comfortably, possessively. Filomena tried to resist, but she moaned, the book slipping from her grasp as she surrendered to her desires.

With a swift motion, she turned on her knees and fisted his shirt, pulling him closer, needing him—and he answered with equal intensity, his fingers tracing the line of her wrist, his body bending despite the protest of his age. He endured it. For her, he would endure anything, so long as it meant he could taste and console her. She opened up so rarely—always giving, never taking. Always putting herself in harm's way. Always suffering in silence.

Today, he wouldn't allow it.

The sound of their coupling echoed through the room, the wet, harmonious sups like a melody, crude and sophisticated all at once. If not for the incessant calling of the world outside, helpless and waiting, they could have stayed that way forever.

As the sun crawled higher in the sky, however, eventually he had to pull away, leaving her breathless but sated.

"Varric was right to entrust his legacy to you," he said, his voice velvet as he brushed his thumb along her reddened cheek. "Whether you see it or not, we trust you. Not because we have to, but because you've earned it. Every second of everyday, you earn it."

Filomena sighed, averting her gaze. "And if I mess up?"

"You won't," he smiled, urging her to look at him, to see how much he believed in her. "We choose to follow you, my darling. We all know the risks, and we know you'll do right by us. No matter what happens."

"Emmrich..." Her voice trembled, a whimper escaping as his warm, hazel eyes rattled her walls, if only for a moment.

For the first time in weeks, the tightness in her chest seemed to loosen.

"You're more than our leader, you're our friend. And to me..." He pressed a final, lingering kiss to her forehead. "To me you're—you're—"

"I know, Emmrich. You don't need to say it."

And she didn't want him to say it. Not yet. Not aloud. She wasn't ready—not for those three words that would make everything undeniably real.

"Darling, it's all right to rely on us every once in a while. That's the whole point of a team. Being in charge doesn't mean you have to do everything alone. We're here for you, just as you're here for us. I'm here for you."

Filomena withdrew into her thoughts, wrestling with the concept. Her entire life, she had been alone. She'd always had to adapt, to prove her worth, or risk being abandoned. But as she stared up at Emmrich, feeling the warmth of his love and adoration, a timid smile spread across her face.

"Come here," he said, pulling her up and wrapping her in his arms.

Filomena gasped, melting into the embrace, her hands gripping his shirt. Maybe—just this once—she'd let herself lean on someone else.

#emmrich #emmrich volkarin #emmrook #rook x emmrich #dragon age the veilguard #veilguard #da: the veilguard #emmrich x rook #rook #rook ingellvar #fan fiction #happy valentine's day #dragon age #fic #appreciation project

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starlit-typewriter · 1 year ago

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Genshin SAGAU, Creator of Teyvat, but not Humanity Part 5

This chapter was like pulling teeth, I swear I switched POV's like 3 times.

Thank you guys so much for reading! Just as a heads up future chapters will be much much slower to update since real life hast decided to reassert it's presence. That being said, enjoy!

Warning for Spoilers up to 4.6

Masterlist | Prev Part | Next Part

~~~

The sharp edge of a sword hovered extremely close to your face. Its wielder's furious golden eyes stared you down.

“Who are you, how did you get here?” They demanded, their floating companion hovering behind their shoulder anxiously, watching this exchange.

For some reason, even though your life was being threatened, you struggled to feel any sense of fear or urgency. That’s probably something you should revisit when you didn’t have a sharp weapon pointed at you.

But you did, so you should pay attention to that, shouldn’t you.

Oh, but you haven’t, you’ve probably been silent for a while, getting lost in thought.

You redirect your attention back to your current situation.

You are in this fancy bedroom you don’t recognize, whilst being threatened at sword point by a pretty teenager you don’t recognize.

Great, go brain, you can do things!

You took a deep breath, preparing yourself for an explanation.

“I don’t mean any harm,” you say, slowly.

The teen in question didn’t seem to believe you. They narrowed their eyes further, actually they were really pretty. Not just the teen themselves, though they are quite pretty, but their eyes sparkled like molten gold, not a common eye color at all.

Now that you think of it, are golden eyes even real? Don’t you need contacts to get golden eyes?

Oh wait, you’ve gotten off track, you’re being threatened.

They were saying something, their mouth was moving and you missed all of it.

You blinked, “sorry could you repeat that I didn’t hear it,” you asked politely, hoping they wouldn’t get mad at the request.

Oh looks like they did, considering how they’re clenching their teeth, they don’t look particularly pleased with you.

Well, you suppose it is rather rude to ignore someone mid confrontation.

Why were you in a confrontation anyways, you weren’t a particularly confrontational person, you liked to avoid drama whenever possible.

You probably shouldn’t be here, you realized. It’d be nice if you were somewhere else, like a nice park or a meadow or something.

Just as you finished your train of thought your surroundings changed.

The chirping of birds and the warmth of the sunlight distracted you from your earlier train of thought.

You were in a lovely meadow, with beautiful golden flowers and a gigantic tree with blue crystalline branches.

It seemed rather empty though, which was a bit of a shame considering how nice it is, but you were hardly going to complain about having the entire place to yourself.

You started walking through the meadow, when a slight pain in your foot distracted you.

You checked to see that you were pricked by a rather sharp piece of gravel.

That’s weird, why are you barefoot outside? Now that you think about it, your clothes are rather strange.

It’s this white flowy garment, reminiscent of the clothing worn by Ancient Grecians.

But you weren’t cold at all, it was honestly quite comfortable.

Wait, what were you thinking about again.

Oh right, you’re talking a walk in this pretty meadow!

~~~

The Wanderer, or well, Hat Guy as people now know him sighed as he flipped through a tedious book about the Origins of the Production of Wood Lacquer in Inazuma and its Effects on Weaponry.

Unfortunately for him, I was there, does not count as a citable source if he doesn’t have the receipts to prove it. Now he has to sort through all these old books to find one with the information he needs to prove his point.

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a familiar figure examining the shelves.

It seems that they noticed him too, judging by the white haired fairy’s flailing. How troublesome.

“What are you doing here,” she whispered fiercely, at least she had enough decency to not raise her voice in a library.

He looked over at his piles of books and papers covering his workstation, and then back at her, wondering if she actually expected an answer to such an obvious question.

She seemed to realize that too, considering the sheepish look she adopted. “Well, you can’t blame me for being curious. You don’t seem like a big library kind of guy.”

“I’m not,” he replied curtly, turning back to his workstation. “Trust me, if I had it any other way, I wouldn’t be here right now.”

Yet somehow, him turning his back to them and ignoring their presence wasn’t hint enough of his lack of enthusiasm to engage in conversation with the two, since they ended up hovering over his shoulder, attempting to read his papers and more importantly, distracting him from his work.

He swears, if he could get a headache, he would. He ends up slapping his hand on top of his notes, disrupting their reading and whipped his head back to give them the most annoyed glare he can.

It doesn’t work, because of course it doesn’t.

Instead the Traveler just gave him a smug smirk, they did this on purpose to annoy him, which makes it worse because he fell for it.

“What do you want,” he gritted out, knowing they won’t let him have his peace until they’re satisfied.

“I need to speak with Nahida,”

Wanderer scoffed at that, “then why are you bothering me? Did the Matra turn you away at the door and now you're begging for my help to get you in?”

“Not at all,” the Traveler smiled, “I just wouldn’t mind your insight on the topic as well,”

“Plus we couldn’t find her in the Sanctuary of Surasthana, ” Paimon chimed in.

He couldn’t stop himself from pulling a face at that inane statement, “Why would she be in the Sanctuary of Surasthana?”

“It’s where we’d meet up with her before,”

“That’s because she didn’t have any rooms or offices of her own,” he explained slowly, like he was talking to a child, well he probably was considering the intellect of the white haired one. “Why would she willingly go back to her prison of 500 years when she now has the resources of all of Sumeru to build herself a new place.”

The white haired fairy in question made an exaggerated face of revelation that he couldn’t help but roll his eyes at.

He looks at his notes longingly, well not quite longingly, it’s still quite annoying, but its bound to be less troublesome than whatever the Traveler has planned.

Sighing to himself, he gathered up his notes and research and headed to the exit of the House of Daena, the Traveler and Paimon hot on his heels.

The three made their way up the winding paths of the Akademya. The puppet ignores all the glances and whispers garnered by the students and visitors alike, and moves as fast as he can without breaking into an outright run.

It doesn’t take long for them to arrive at The Dendro Archon’s new residence. Designed by the Light of Kshahrewar himself, its a beautiful structure with many windows and balconies, designed to be everything the Sanctuary was not.

He headed straight in, the Matra having long gotten used to his frequent comings and goings with the Dendro Archon. He honestly doesn't know what reasoning they’ve decided on to explain why Lesser Lord Kusanali spends so much time with him, and honestly he couldn’t care less. It’s simply the fact that they couldn’t keep their mouths shut and now he has to deal with complete strangers coming up to him in an attempt to learn more about her.

He could hear the other two, awing at the architecture as they made their way in. Privately he did appreciate the architect's tact in designing this building. Whilst still made in the classic rounded Sumeru fashion, he managed to avoid any references to the Sanctuary of Surasthana, ensuring that there weren't many large empty spaces or darkened ceilings.

He knew she still avoided the building whenever she could, even though she rejected his proposition to have it torn down. It’s a curious relationship, for whilst it was her prison for so long, it was also the only place she knew and could call home.

Regardless of the matter, it wasn’t for him to pry.

Before long he had reached her office, offering a cursory knock before barging his way in. If she had a problem with his way of entering her rooms and offices she would've long told him to stop, but she didn’t so he didn’t.

It was a lot messier than he’d seen it last. Papers and reports scattered around the office, stacked in messy piles on her desk.

Lesser Lord Kusanali blinked up at him from where she was seated, before breaking into a smile when the Traveler and Paimon walked in.

She greeted them with enthusiasm, moving out from behind her desk to talk to them properly.

He tuned out the rest of their small talk, it was nothing more than empty pleasantries to fill the air before they got the actually important parts that were relevant to his presence.

“-ject Stuzha,”

He blinked, focusing back onto the topic of conversation.

“Hmm, I must admit I haven’t seen many records on this project before,” the Dendro Archon said, her expectant gaze turning to him.

He couldn't help but bristle slightly at the attention. “I’ve already given you most of the information I have about the Fatui.”

“Most is not all,” she replied simply, “and besides, from what the Traveler just said it seems to be something they’re mobilizing all their forces on.”

Logically he knew that it would be in everyone’s best interests if he told them all he knew about the project, but old habits die hard. The Tsaritsa’s court was nothing more than the world most extensive chess game. Every action and movement had to be calculated to give the player the best advantage, every scrap of information hard won.

As much as it rankled him to admit, he was only the 6th Harbinger and the Director only gave out as much information as was strictly required, no more no less. But he did have some information, some he was given, some through sleuthing and others through his own conjecture.

He warned them of that before launching into an explanation of what he had seen and figured out.

“From the timing of things, it is clear that Project Stuzha is related to the gnosis, especially since the only one of the seven that they’re missing is the Pyro Gnosis.” His audience nodded at that assumption.

“It’s also related in some way to the state of things in Teyvat and the survival of humanity as a species. As things stand, Teyvat is becoming more and more inhabitable for regular humans. With ley line disorders, abyssal energy and dead godly remains lurking about. Project Stuzha is supposed to fix that, permanently.”

“But how,” Paimon interrupted, her head darting back and forth in confusion.

“No idea,” he shrugged, “All I know is that it has something to do with the Abyss.”

“The Abyss? I thought that place had nothing but monsters and dead gods?”

Wanderer shook his head at that, “That’s just a common misconception. There’s actually the remains of an entire world down there. A human world.”

Both the Traveler and Paimon looked shocked at that statement.

He’d already shared this information with Lesser Lord Kusanali so she didn’t look surprised, but she was deep in thought.

“I didn’t know that there were entire realms banished to the abyss, and I thought Enkanomiya was creepy.”

“It wasn't banished,” he refuted, “From my investigations, it seems that the civilization was built and founded there.”

There was a moment of silence as they contemplated his words.

“That brings up more questions about the origins of humans,” Lesser Lord Kusanali commented, “Irregardless of that, I believe you had another question for us Traveler?”

“Oh right!,” Paimon chimed in, looking over to the Traveler who stepped forward.

“We’re looking more into the blessings that keep happening and we'd like to hear your opinion of it.” They paused, looking between the two of them.

“Ah,” the Dendro Archon paused, looking at Wanderer.

“The thing is, we've already tried,”

“And failed.” He couldn’t help but add, to quash any hope that the duo may have.

“What do you mean by failed!” The fairy gasped.

“Well, that’s not exactly the case,” she tried to reassure. “It’s more like, there weren’t any results where we were looking. ”

“That’s just another way to say you found nothing!”

“Actually Paimon, finding nothing gives you a lot of information about where it is found!” She explained. “The thing is, the blessings we experienced aren’t connected to Irminsul in any way, so we can conclude that it originated from somewhere outside of Teyvat.”

”Does that mean that it can’t be tracked?” The Traveler asked,

”Hmm, well from our experiences, it’s quite easy for those who’ve been blessed to recognize each other since they can feel each other’s blessing, but the range for that is no more than the size of two Sumpter Beasts.”

That was an irritating experience, having to stand in the middle of Sumeru City for hours as that annoying forest watcher had to try to find him through only his blessing. It took over half the day before they concluded that the energy of the blessing was far too weak to use as a tracking mechanism.

Thankfully, any experiments they had were benign and didn’t involve anything close to what he imagined that damned doctor attempted to inflict on Tartaglia before being shut down by the Tsaritsa.

If that were the case he’d probably have hated the flame flickering in his hollow chest a lot more.

Well, hate is a strong word. He didn’t deny that having the blessing made him a lot stronger than he ever was previously and on some level is grateful for its calming warmth. But a private part of him wished it had appeared to him sooner.

Logically he understood that the blessings were in some way connected to the Traveler and that they hadn’t appeared until well after his appointment as a Harbinger.

But the other small quiet part of him wonders just how different his life could’ve been had this blessing appeared before that.

Would he have been able to save Niwa, or that little boy. Maybe even the Sho-

He can’t go down that train of thought.

What’s done is done and all he can do now is attempt to make amends and move on.

He tuned back into the topic only to find them talking about some kind of dessert they had in fontaine. Ugh.

He waited,

And waited,

And waited some more.

…

This conversation was taking too long.

And he isn’t even in it!

“Can I leave,” he butted in, realizing that their conversation is never going to go back to anything useful.

“Oh I’m sorry, are we interrupting your incredibly important work about glazeworks or something,” Pamon mocked.

Ignoring her he turned to the Dendro Archon who looked delighted.

“You’re still working on the new essay?” She exclaimed, clapping her hands together in delight.

He felt his eyebrow twitch in irritation. “I would’ve had it done a week ago, if someone actually let me use accurate sources,” he snapped.

“Oh come on, it’s not so bad. Besides, how are you going to explain how Hat Guy knows so much about ancient Inazumen weapon crafting techniques that have been lost to time.”

“You could vouch for me,”

“But that wouldn’t be fair to all the other students now would it.”

He took a deep breath, remembering how he’d already tried and failed to argue his case a week prior, “so can I go or what?”

“Oh course, what kind of Archon of Wisdom would I be if I prevented learning and research!”

He took that as his cue to leave, stomping out of her office, faintly hearing the fairy commenting about how she’s surprised that he’s actually doing his schoolwork.

As if he’d let some inconsequential mortal get better grades than him.

Besides, being the top of his class means that he won’t have any irritating students come up to him and ask if he needs help or offer tutoring.

Of course, being top of his class also means that there are now people coming to him to ask for tutoring or help.

But at least those are easier to turn away.

Hopefully he doesn’t get interrupted anymore today, if so he should be able to finish this reference by tonight.

~~~

Masterlist | Prev Part | Next Part

Things are heating up huh!

I wonder where our dear creator has found themselves. Oh and don't worry too much about their state of mind, that will come up again soon!

Taglist: @bunniotomia,@lucid-stories, @ymechi, @chocogi, @ra404, @ash1, @esthelily, @tottybear, @mmeatt, @quacking-simp, @reemthetheme, @universallyenthusiastsage, @resident-cryptid, @fantasyhopperhea, @thedevioussmirk, @etherisy, @naynayaa

Once again, my ask box is open if you'd like to join the taglist or just leave comments or questions. I promise I don't bite!

#genshin impact #genshin impact sagau #genshin sagau #sagau #genshin cult au #My writing

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callmerainbowcookie · 4 months ago

Text

There he is

Need some crush smut?

My first smut fic, I've always wanted to have a go 🙈

Pairing: Your crush male x fem reader

Content: Male crush x fem reader, work acquaintances to lovers, eventual smut,

Imagine your crush celebrity, IRL, whoever you want in this senorio...

You've noticed him around your work. He's new, and every time you look at him, it makes the butterflies go crazy in your tummy, and you find yourself biting your lip. All sorts of thoughts flood your head, thoughts you would never say out loud. One day, you walk down the corridor, and you see him walking towards you. He's on his phone looking down at it until he lifts his eyes to look up, and he makes eye contact with you. You look back, almost transfixed. Time seems to be slower, frozen in the moment. He smiles at you with his lips, almost a smirk but soft, not breaking eye contact. You want to say something, but you can't. As he walks past you, you can catch a glimpse of his scent; aftershave, so sweet, yet masculine, it's quite intoxicating. As you both pass each other, you never break eye contact until he looks to open the next door in front of him. You stand still and watch him walk through the door and out of sight. Just the eye contact alone makes your heart pound, and you feel yourself getting hot, and you need to run to the bathroom to calm down. Oh my God, you thought, you've never been that close to him before.

You can't get the encounter out of your head. Though it was brief, it felt so ingrained in your head. It's all you think about for the rest of the day. You look at your computer screen and twirl your hair around your finger. Those eyes, so perfect, so captivating. His face, so handsome, his body so broard, muscly. His...

'Y/N!' You jump out of your skin, it's your colleague; Jessie abruptly snapping you back to reality.

'You scared the shit out of me!' You say. She laughs.

'I'm sorry, but you were staring at the screen with the most blank, dopey expression on your face. Only half an hour to go, want to grab a drink in a bit?' She asked.

'Yeah, why not?' You relpy, a drink would be a good distraction, what must I have looked like? You shudder at the thought.

A while later, you're having a few drinks with Jessie and some of your other colleagues. Jessie is your closest friend at the office. You love how down to earth she is and how she is never shy of airing out her dirty laundry and over sharing. You only briefly listen to the conversations at first, what you can keep up with anyway. However you show interest when she starts talking about your crush.

'Omg, he's so gorgeous, the things I would let him do to me, phaw!' as she's fanning her face with her hand. You laugh and roll your eyes, great, I needed a distraction, now he's back in my head again. She went on about him for ages, and you agreed with everything she said.

'Is he married?' You ask.

'No, I don't think so there's no ring on his finger that I've noticed, I don't know about a girlfriend though, I've only said Hello to him a few times, I have to get away from him because I start to blush', she laughs. You laugh too, and take a sip of your drink. He has that effect on everyone, it seems.

Next chapter 📖

#Smut #Crush smut #imagine #crush x reader #Crush x reader smut

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heavenlyraindrops · 1 year ago

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♱ Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Eight ♱

Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Eight Warnings: profanity, smut (nsfw content) oral (f recieving) How to find the other chapters in my pinned post.

♱Where the purest soul in Heaven falls for the Devil♱

[Chapter Eight]

“Lucifer,” you hissed, swooping down towards a balcony jutting out into the red sky. Lucifer grinned at you awkwardly, and your eyes flicked to his rolled up sleeves as your wings retracted into your back.

“[name],” he said, and his voice seemed to be bursting with an eagerness for something you couldn’t place. His eyes scanned the sky, before reaching out to grab your arm and pull you in. You stumbled into his chest, feeling his arm circle around you in an embrace. You pulled back and stared into his golden eyes. “Every time you leave the year feels even longer.”

Your eyes fell onto his bow, and you fiddled with it for a moment before glancing back up at him. You leaned in.

The second your lips met his hand was on your waist, gripping it tightly and pulling you in, kissing you hungrily as if he was dying in the desert and you were an oasis. You felt his teeth nip at your bottom lip and you pulled away, heart pounding.

“Sorry,” he muttered, flush and out of breath. You watched him struggle to keep the smile off of his face. “Just missed you.”

You tilted your head to the side, eyes flicking down to his lips. He seemed to sense what you were about to do seconds before your hand went for his collar, pulling him in for another, hungrier kiss.

You pulled away. “Missed you too.”

♱♱♱

You pulled a ring out of your satchel, dropping it into his hand. You watched his fingers closing around it.

You did this, every year- you’d bring something of your own to give to him, a keepsake.

Sitting back on the bed, you kicked your feet, watching him hide the ring away in a drawer. A drawer who’s top surface had been dominated by a cursed amount of ducks. They were multiplying. Of course, they were.

“You really are building an army, huh?”

Lucifer glanced at you, a smile spreading across his face. You slouched, wondering if you should tell him about Adam’s plan to get the wait between exterminations, reduced, but in the end pressed your lips shut. If it wasn’t going to happen there wasn’t any point in mentioning it anyways, or not with much urgency at least.

“How’s your year been?” You glanced up at Lucifer. With a flick of your hand, you beckoned him over, something which he complied to eagerly. You flushed at the look that he gave you.

“It’s been fine,” you murmured. “Other than Adam won’t take the hint, and an exorcist screamed at me the next morning after falling asleep drunk on my couch-“ you raised your eyebrow at the fact that he had decided to sit down on the floor looking up at you- “it’s been quite uneventful. Oh. And I started growing these new flowers.”

Upon hearing Adam’s name, you could feel him tense up against your leg. “So he still hasn’t backed off, huh?”

“No. Why, you worried I’m gonna say yes to him?” You smirked, and he looked up at you, grinning nervously. You flicked his forehead playfully.

“Well, I uh- never mind, then,” he rambled nervously, hand on the back of his neck. You smiled softly, and he managed a smile back, although a bit crooked. Then something in his expression changed.

“Well, I won’t,” You reassured him, eyes trained outside the window, not noticing him clench and unclench his fists, or lick his lips.

“I should hope not,” he said, sounding slightly breathless. You leaned back, deciding to pretend as if you didn’t notice a change in his tone. But you did.

His eyes flicked up and down your body, once, then slower next time. You felt his hand slide onto your thigh. “What are you doing?” You murmured, and it took all you had to keep your voice level and not rise to a squeak.

“[name],” he said, and his voice shook lightly.

“Yes?”

You didn’t need to hear him say what he was thinking next. You already knew it.

His hand slid in between your legs, fingers ghosting across your inner thigh. You shivered, watching his adam’s apple move as he gulped.

“Can I…?” His voice was low.

Your muscles tensed, all your breath escaping you as he pressed his lips against the side of your thigh, eyes looking up at you, pleading.

“Please-“

“Yes.”

You felt him tense against you, before a smirk spread across his face, and fuck it’s hot, and now your skirt was riding up your legs and your heart was pounding a million beats a minute.

His lips trailed their way up your thigh again, warm against your skin, leaving a trail of small bruises and bites slowly darkening against your skin. You whimpered, weaving your fingers through his hair, which made him flinch, his hand on the other side of your thigh tightening, nails digging into skin.

He hooked a finger around the waistband of your underwear, dragging it down painfully slow. You gulped, shaking as he positioned himself in between your legs.

“I haven’t done this in a while,” he murmured, his breath hot against your skin. “So,” he let out a short breath. “Might be a bit rusty.”

You hummed understandingly, running your fingers through his hair gently, until you felt his hot, wet tongue on your entrance. You flinched at the sudden contact, jerking your hips but his hands slid up and pinned you down.

“Hush,” he muttered, mouth pressed against your core, the vibration from his low voice sending waves into your body. You clamped your hand over your mouth as his tongue drew circles across your clit, and you felt your muscles involuntary clench and your legs draw together.

Lucifer grunted, pressing his palms on the inner side of your legs and pushing you legs apart again, hands gripping your thighs in place as he flicked his tongue, causing you to spasm again and whimper. You were dripping- you could feel it, your own arousal mixing with his saliva, coating your skin.

He looked up, hair mussed, and his nails momentarily dug into your skin. “Take your hand off of your mouth,” he hissed, and you did so, gulping. “I want to hear you.”

And with that he delved in again, one hand abandoning your thigh and pushing apart your folds, thrusting his tongue in, and you bucked your hips again feeling the pleasure shoot through you. A light moan escaped your lips as he inserted a finger.

“My name,” he muttered, as you clawed at his hair for something to ground you. The vibrations trembled against you again, making you whimper.

“Lucifer,” you gasped, as his finger curled inside you. He began to pump it in and out, painfully slow, taking his time as he continued giving you the same attention with his tongue.

“Again.”

“Lucifer,” you moaned, although it sounded like a plea as you threw your head back as his palm dug against your hip to make you stop squirming. Another finger in, coiling inside you with a deft flick as you let out another moan from the shooting pleasure, gasping for air. You bucked your hips towards him again, silently begging for more stimulus, and he chuckled at your desperation. “Fuck.”

His tongue swirled over your clit again, quick as lighting, and if you weren’t in such a state you would have felt the initials he had traced: LM.

Tremors racked your body, until you felt a white-hot pleasure sear through you, as if every tense muscle in your body had unraveled at once. Lucifer immediately pushed himself up and onto you as you came, pinning you onto the bed and crashing his lips against yours. You could taste yourself on him, and he knew it- his other finger still touched you, seeing you through the orgasm.

You felt him whisper sweet nothings, his breath on your lips as he pulled away for air before diving in again. And then it was over.

Your eyes fluttered shut, feeling Lucifer slump next to you and throw his arm across you. You turned, and noticed he wasn’t tired. He was grinning at you, waiting for you to say something. “Good?”

You opened your mouth to speak, but no words formed, so simply nodded. For a moment he looked worried, until you pushed yourself up, towards him, your words whispered for only him to ear.

“Again. Please.”

♱♱♱

Another orgasm tore through your body, and you could barely even hear the moaned words that fell from your lips as you fell back on the bed, or hear Lucifer’s amused chuckle as he got up and pressed kisses down your collarbone and jaw, on top of the already-made collection of bite marks and bruises staining your skin.

You shuddered as he lay back down next to you again, burying his face in your shoulder. You could feel his smirk against your skin. “Already tired?”

You inwardly rolled your eyes. You’d lost count of how many times he’d made you come- everything blurred together after a while. His arm circled across your waist, and then he pushed himself up so he could hover over you.

“What?” You muttered, face burning.

“It’s nice to see you like this.”

“Like what?”

“You know.” He leaned forward, whispering, his breath ghosting across the shell of your ear. “You’re always so put together. It’s nice to see you come undone so easily, because of me.” He pressed a light kiss to the shell of your ear, making you shiver.

You pressed your hand against his chest. “What about you?”

“Don’t worry about me.” He winked and kissed you again, quickly. “You can pay me back next time.”

You pulled him in for another quick kiss.

“I will,” you promised.

♱♱♱

A/N: Hi guys! Just noticed that the hyperlinks to the Masterlist and the links on the Masterlist to the teasers and chapters don’t work anymore. And I’m too tired to renew them, so, if you can’t find the rest of my chapters or can’t be bothered to comb through my blog, go to the first tag on this post, and it should have all the chapters and teasers since I’ve placed the exact same unique tag on them.

Taglist: @boredlime, @ica1, @tremendoushearttaco, @sweetadonisbutbetter, @lucky-flowey,@kitty-kei, @thornwolfy235, @w31rd3rg1rl, @marxo5, @lvstyangel, @brainz00, @lukerycyja-reblogs, @dickmastersworld,@everlastprime259-blog, @rain-doll401-blog, @bakugounuggets, @ren-ren23, @mjhehe09,@angelicwillows, @rayyrayysanchez, @luleck, @dellugh-shposts, @rebecca-hvnstn, @l0v3lyx, @ravenswritingroom, @rattyrattyratty, @lovayle, @relatedsoda, @cimadreamer, @valckenaux

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opbackgrounds · 2 months ago

Note

An idea I had for the live-action, back when we thought it would cover Alabasta in season 2, was for them to move Thriller Bark to after Skypiea. That way they could cover Jaya, Skypiea, and Thriller Bark in season 3, then season 4 could be Long Ring Long Land, Water Seven, and Enies Lobby, then Season 5 could be Sabaody to Post-Marineford. Roughly 130 chapters per season.

I still kinda think that the idea of doing Thriller Bark after Skypiea is an interesting one, from a purely theoretical approach. I'm curious to hear your thoughts on the idea. Some changes I was thinking of:

Franky is absent from Thriller Bark, and Brook is present for Long Ring Long Land, Water Seven, and Enies Lobby. This obviously changes a lot.

Instead of using Gears 2 and 3, Luffy defeats Moria with Nightmare Luffy. This mirrors him defeating Enel with the golden ball, since they're power-ups he gained from the main villain.

Nightmare Luffy and Golden Luffy could then be the inspiration for Gears 2 and 3. Nightmare Luffy inspiring Gear 2, and Golden Luffy inspiring Gear 3. Instead of relying on his enemies for power-ups, Luffy invented power-ups of his own.

Because Franky is absent, Robin has to ask Brook the insensitive question about what keeps him going, why he doesn't just kill himself. But that works because this is pre-Enies Lobby Robin, she's suicidal.

Moving Enies Lobby to shortly before Impel Down and Marineford makes the arcs seem more connected.

The Merry gets to go a bit further before breaking down near the end of the first half of the Grand Line. The Sunny didn't really do anything in Thriller Bark anyway.

Moria saying Luffy will lose his crew still carries foreshadowing weight, since Foxy tries to poach them and they split up in Water Seven.

I'm not necessarily saying this would be better than what we got. I just think it's a potentially interesting thought exercise.

Getting through the Skypiea saga and Thriller Bark in one 8 episode season wouldn’t work, and even if Netflix magically started putting out the money for longer seasons, what’s the narrative throughline? Ending any season with Thriller Bark would be a mistake, and the foreshadowing with Moriah works much better with the curb stomp at Sabaody and Marineford. Season one couldn’t even get through 100 chapters comfortably, 130 is asking too much.

If Matt Owen’s ends up rejoining opla (not a guarantee, I know) then he’s going to fight to keep the live action as close to the manga as possible. All indications are that he’s the reason why the Alabasta saga is being split into multiple seasons, because he didn’t want to skip arcs. I’d rather take things a little bit slower and get through less manga material before the series is inevitably cancelled and see it done well than have it be rushed for the sake of getting to popular arcs faster.

Making huge changes like swapping arc placement invites a lot of unforeseen complications, small differences between adaptation and source material that tend to grow over time. Oda’s given Netflix a roadmap for success, so why deviate from it? The change would be a lateral move at best, and if it’s not going to definitively improve the story I don’t see the point in going for it.

#sarc talks #opla

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keyboardsmashess · 4 months ago

Text

The Siren, or The Heart of the Matter

Chapter Thirty Three: The Miracle, or Ten Words and a Thousand Kisses

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC

Warnings: language, fluff, angst, canon-typical violence, smut, implied abuse MINORS DNI. A/N: Well, this is it, bbs. The final chapter of Cleo and Bucky's story ❤️ CW for some bonus smut Chapter one of my next work should be coming next week, but it's going to have a slower (read: more reasonable for me) posting schedule. Expect one a week or so, but I'll try to be consistent. I'll be posting a sneak peek here in a few days, though ❤️

Summary: Cleo and Bucky have one final mission.

Chapter Directory

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

Bucky nods, glancing nervously between me and Steve. “Positive. I can’t have this hangin’ over my head for the rest of my life.”

Steve nods decisively. “Alright, then, if you’re sure.” He glances at me nervously, but I give him a reassuring smile. I know in my bones that everything is going to be fine, but I understand why Bucky’s being cautious, just in case.

I press my hand to the glass. “Whatever happens, James, I love you.”

He presses his own against the other side of the glass, mirroring me from within the padded room Tony built to contain my screaming practices all those months ago. “I love you, too.”

Steve takes a deep breath.

“Longing.”

Bucky winces, but it seems more pavlovian than a genuine reaction to pain. He gestures for Steve to continue.

******

I groan frustratedly, flipping onto my side. For the first night since Bucky and I started taking turns at each other’s apartments, I’m having an insomniac moment.

“Cleo, what’s wrong?” he mumbles, face still soft from sleep.

I sit up. “Does… does it ever get easier?” I ask, voice small and wobbly. “Knowing that… you took someone’s life?”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Bucky sighs, propping himself up on one elbow to look at me. “How long has this been bothering you?”

“Since the moment I had you back,” I say, frowning. “When I agreed to join the team, I never thought I’d… I didn’t realize I had that in me, you know? Now I’m wondering if it was the wrong thing to do. I mean, they were horrible people and they were hurting you, so it isn’t like the world is going to miss them, but you know.”

He reaches up to cup my chin, stroking my cheek with a thumb. “Do you want the comforting answer or the honest answer?”

I look at him flatly. “Honest, obviously.”

“Right, should’ve guessed that,” Bucky says, heaving a sigh. “Honestly, Cleo… No. It doesn’t get easier, necessarily. But I think, over time, you start to make your peace with it. With knowing that you did what you had to do.”

I nod, wiping at my face.

“And for what it’s worth,” he continues, thumbing a tear from my cheek. “I do think you did what you had to do. There weren’t a lot of other options.”

I smile sadly at him, leaning down to kiss his nose. “Thank you. I think what I feel the worst about is that I don’t regret it - not really, not knowing that it led to this.” I take his hand and squeeze it. “But maybe you’re right, maybe I just need time.”

Bucky lays back down, yanking on our joined hands to pull me down next to him. “You’d be surprised what a little bit of time can heal,” he says softly, and I nod.

I rest my head on his chest and finally drift off to sleep, everything feeling just a little less heavy now that I’ve got someone to hold it with me.

******

“Rusted.”

I hold my breath, but Bucky doesn’t react at all.

“Seventeen.”

Bucky runs a nervous hand through his hair and gives me a small smile when he sees me tracking the movement.

******

Bucky, Steve, and I enter the common room after our run. I make a break for the coffee machine, patting Betty fondly as I place my usual order. When I turn, mug in hand, I catch Bucky staring at my snug athletic shorts, a delicious heat in his eyes. I take a sip, returning his burning look over the rim of my coffee mug, and he grins wickedly.

“For crying out loud, could you two at least wait for me to leave the room?” Steve says, voice pleading.

I blush, suddenly finding my mug incredibly interesting, and Bucky scratches the back of his neck. “Sorry,” he says, sounding anything but.

Steve sighs. “I need new running partners. You two are on your own.” I stifle a laugh as he grabs a drink from the fridge and stalks off toward our shared floor.

Bucky is around the bar the second Steve is out of sight, taking the mug from me and setting it down on the counter. “Careful, Barnes - come between me and coffee at your own peril.”

He gives me that wicked, wicked look again and heat pools instantly in my core. “On second thought,” I say, “I’ve heard that too much caffeine isn’t great for anxiety.”

Bucky grips my waist and lifts me effortlessly onto the countertop, putting me right at his height, and braces a palm on either side of me. He gives me a quick, teasing kiss before stepping back, and I whine and wrap my legs around his middle to pull him closer.

I kiss him deeply, encircling his neck with my arms, and he gives up his teasing act immediately at my touch. I sigh contentedly and he slips his tongue between my lips.

“Christ, Rogers wasn’t kidding,” Nat says, and Bucky reluctantly pulls back as I wipe my mouth self-consciously. She glares at us. “We have to eat here, you know.”

I blush and hop off the counter, and Bucky surreptitiously steps behind me to hide his reaction to our kissing. Natasha rolls her eyes, and I grimace. “Sorry, Nat. We were just, uh, talking about…”

“About each other’s lips?” she asks sarcastically. “Get out of here, you fucking degenerates. I’m about to hold another intervention.”

I blush furiously and Bucky places his hands on my shoulders, steering me quickly out of the room and toward the elevator. We don’t make it much further than that, as it turns out, pulling the emergency stop button before the elevator reaches our shared floor.

When it finally arrives and the doors open, Steve is standing in the hallway with a disappointed look in his eyes. “I’m starting to think Stark was right and we should have left you two on the damn submarine.”

I smile at him innocently as Bucky grabs my underwear from where they’d gotten stuck on the handle of the ceiling’s emergency hatch, and furtively stuffs them in his pocket. I cover my face when I realize what just happened, letting Bucky lead me into the hall. He pats Steve on the shoulder as we walk past him. “One day you’ll get a gal, Stevie, and then you’ll understand.”

Steve mutters something that sounds like ‘insufferable’ as Bucky and I make our rapid way to my apartment.

******

“Daybreak.”

His hands clench, and he squeezes his eyes shut.

“Furnace.”

I see the muscles of Bucky’s jaw working, and I turn to Steve. He ignores me, focusing only on his friend.

“Nine.”

Bucky shakes his head, and I bring my fingers to my lips when I see the lines of his face etched in worry.

******

Laying in bed, tracing circles on his bare chest, I take a deep breath. “Buck?” He hums, looking down at me adoringly. “I have a stupid question.”

“No such thing as stupid questions,” he says. “Ask me anything.”

“What…” I bite my lip. “What are we?”

Bucky’s eyebrows knit together in confusion. “A very old supersoldier and a cosmic energy host, according to you,” he chuckles. I frown, and he clocks the expression, tipping my chin up to give me a sweet, small kiss. “Clearly that isn’t what you meant.”

I shake my head. “No. I’m asking… Ugh, I feel like a fucking teenager right now, this is so stupid. I’m asking what we are, you and me together. Like… what would you call this thing between us?”

His eyes soften in understanding. “Oh, I get it now. Cleo, that isn’t stupid - if I’d known you were worried about it, I’d have brought this up the second we stepped off that damn submarine.” I let out a little sigh of relief and smile up at him. “Sweetheart, we can be whatever you want us to be. Back in the day,” he says in a silly voice, and I can’t help but laugh, “I’d have called us ‘going steady,’ but that feels outdated and not nearly important enough to describe what you are to me.”

He kisses the tip of my nose, and I blush. “What do you want us to be?” he asks tenderly.

I turn my focus back to his chest, running my fingers through the hair growing there idly to avoid looking him in the eye. “I don’t know,” I say. “I’ve never felt this with someone before.”

Bucky makes a small noise of surprise, but when I look up at him he’s schooled his features back into a loving gaze. “Wellll,” he says, drawing the word out. “If someone asked me, I’d like to be able to at least tell them you’re my girlfriend.” He blushes adorably. “And… I’d prefer it if you weren’t going on dates with librarians, or anyone else for that matter.”

I grin at him, anxiety finally eased. “There was never a date with a librarian, Buck, because it’s been you since the moment we met.” He beams at me, and I can’t resist the urge to kiss him.

A few moments later, we break apart, breathing hard. “Monogamous girlfriend sounds good,” I say, hands trailing down his chest and lower. “But I think I’ll just call you my love.” He groans, and I can’t tell if it’s from my words or my wandering hands.

******

“Benign.”

Bucky cries out in pain, sinking to his knees on the padded floor.

“Steve, stop,” I shout. “Stop - it’s hurting him.”

Bucky shakes his head vehemently, not opening his eyes. “No. Steve, you have to keep going. I have to do this.”

“Okay, Buck,” Steve says softly, voice full of his own pain.

“Homecoming.”

Bucky grits his teeth, groaning through his clenched jaw. I resist the urge to cover my eyes, knowing I owe it to him to witness his pain - to hold it with him.

“One.”

Bucky screams sharply and waves his arm. I huff a sigh of relief, thinking he’s going to put an end to this. “Get her out of here, Steve. I don’t want her to see it if it doesn’t work.”

I blanch. “Are you crazy? I’m not leaving!”

He shakes his head. “Steve, you have to make her go.”

I place both hands on the window. “James Buchanan Barnes, you listen to me. You promised - swore - that you’d trust me to make my own choices. And right now, I’m choosing to stay here, no matter what happens, because I love you, you idiot.”

Bucky huffs a laugh through the obvious pain. “God, you’re fucking impossible. Alright, fine.” He winces. “Steve, please. Finish this.”

******

The rays of sun are hitting Bucky’s face just right when I blink my eyes open. I simply cannot help but lean over and wake him with a deep kiss.

“Cleo?” he groans, blinking his eyes open. “What time is it?”

I pull back and look down at him with devotion. “I don’t know, like seven? We slept in.”

He grins up at me, and I become hyper-aware of the fact that I fell asleep before putting any clothes back on last night. “Well then, we may as well stay in bed a little longer.” His hand vines up my leg under the covers and I gasp when, without any ado whatsoever, he brings his fingers right to my core.

His head disappears beneath the blanket, and when his tongue makes its wicked way to my center, I find myself intensely grateful that the Tower’s apartments are sound-proofed.

“Oh my gods, James,” I moan loudly, and I can feel him grin against my skin as he plunges his tongue inside me. He brings a thumb to my clit, teasing it as he moves his tongue in devastating thrusts. I’m completely undone, head tipped back against the pillows and mouth open wide - no clue what’s coming out of my mouth except that, whatever it is, it’s loud.

I unravel so quickly under his tongue, finding my release with a cry that has my light bulbs shattering in every single lamp.

Bucky pops his head out from under the covers, hair adorably mussed and smiling smugly as he licks his lips. “We need to start buying light bulbs in bulk.”

I grin hazily and he presses a kiss against my temple, snuggling close to me as I recover. “That, or we just get rid of our lamps.”

His face grows serious as he lifts up on an elbow to look at me. “Absolutely not. Out of the question.”

I giggle and reach up to smooth the lines from his forehead. “Alright, my love, relax. We can keep the lamps.”

“Good,” he says, lifting my hand to his lips so he can kiss each one of my fingertips. “Although, I had a thought.”

“Oh no, that sounds dangerous,” I tease, and he rolls his eyes, suddenly looking quite nervous.

“What if…” he trails off, so I squeeze his hand and give him a comforting smile. “What if my lamps and your lamps were in the same apartment?”

My eyebrows furrow. “Then one of us wouldn’t have any lamps, which is apparently a problem for you.”

Bucky sighs deeply and bites his lip. “No, I’m trying to say… What if we didn’t have to go back and forth every night? What if - what if we just had one apartment. For both of us.”

My eyes go wide and, without even thinking, I pounce on him, straddling his waist and peppering kisses all down his face, neck, shoulders. He laughs, a sound of pure joy, and I sit up, looking down at him. “James, are you asking me to move in with you?”

He blushes, grinning furiously, and gives me a crooked grin. “Yeah, doll, I am.”

I roll my eyes. “I’m going to ignore that because I’m too fucking happy to be irritated with you right now.”

Bucky reaches up and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. “Is that a yes?”

I simply kiss him again. And again, and again, and again.

******

“Freight car.”

The three of us are completely still for a beat before Bucky blinks his eyes open, staring right into my soul.

“Holy shit,” he whispers, and a sob escapes me when the voice I hear is that of my love.

“Cleo, you’re - you’re a miracle. You did it.” I cover my mouth with trembling fingers and loose a shaky laugh, grabbing Steve’s arm with my other hand. “You really did it.”

Steve whoops, pumping a fist in the air, and makes for the door, but for once I’m faster than the supersoldier. Before he’s taken two steps, I’m in the room, tackling Bucky to the ground in a hug.

He kisses me hard. “You really did it,” he repeats, voice no louder than a whisper. He wipes an errant tear from my face.

Steve sniffles loudly, and we both look up. He wipes at the corner of his eye. “What?” he asks at our wide-eyed expressions. “You saved my best friend with the power of love. I’m bound to be emotional about that!”

I giggle and stand, pulling Bucky up with me. I pat Steve on the shoulder. “I know, Big Guy. It’s okay.” He gives me a watery grin, and I return it. “So what now? Do we celebrate?” I ask.

Bucky shoots Steve a significant look that I don’t really understand, and Steve’s eyes go wide. “Oh. Oh. Um, I actually have some… stuff to do. Real important stuff, so I’m just gonna go… do that. Right now. Probably for an hour.” Bucky clears his throat, and Steve’s eyebrows shoot up. “Really? Wow. I mean, actually probably for a few hours? Yeah. So. See you later.”

He disappears through the door before I can respond, and I narrow my eyes at Bucky. “What was that about?”

Bucky shrugs, an innocent look plastered on his face. “I have no idea. Steve is a mystery even I don’t understand, sometimes.”

I roll my eyes, but I can feel my cheeks heating with a blush. “A few hours, huh? Someone’s feeling ambitious.”

Bucky smirks and takes my hand, leading me out of the room and practically running toward our apartment. “Hey, I have a new lease on life.”

“Whatever you say, Sergeant Barnes.”

Bucky groans, fumbling as he tries to open the door, and the second we’re inside he has me pushed up against the wall in a desperate kiss.

“So,” I say between kisses, unable to help myself. “Wanna watch Supernatural?”

Bucky moves to kiss the sensitive spot behind my ear. “I had something else in mind - something that doesn’t involve you watching two other men.”

I laugh, voice breathy under his attention. “I don’t know,” I say, teasing. “Dean is pretty hunky.”

Bucky growls, capturing my lips in a deep kiss, and snakes his metal hand down my back to grip my ass. Hard. I moan. “What was that?” he asks, voice low.

I lift one leg to wrap it around his waist and he gets the memo, picking me up and pressing my back against the door. “Nothing,” I say against his lips. “My thing’s stupid. Let’s do your thing.”

He chuckles and backs away from the door, carrying me into our bedroom. “That’s what I thought.”

We undress quickly and lay back on the bed, but instead of giving in to a flurry of movement as per usual, I straddle his waist and lean down to place slow, delicate kisses along the gnarled skin where Bucky’s shoulder connects to his metal arm. He watches me with wide, reverent eyes, and when I meet them with my own loving gaze, the emotion I see bowls me over.

I cup his cheeks with my palms, just staring at him - at this stunning man who’s given me the startling gift of his love. “James,” I say.

He nods, tears pricking the corners of his beautiful blue eyes. “Yeah,” he says. “I know.”

I trace the lines of his face with my fingers - an entire world I’ve already mapped every inch of, yet never grow tired of exploring.

“James,” I repeat, grazing his nose, his cheeks, his lips. “Welcome home.”

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Final A/N: Wow! We did it, my loves. 33 chapters, 100,000+ words, so much angst, a little smut, weird stuff with lamps, and one complete story about two idiots healing from trauma and falling in love. Thank you all for coming along on this journey with me. When I decided to try my hand at writing fanfiction for the first time since I was fourteen - *mumbles* years ago, if you can believe it - I had no idea this was what would come from it. Thank you all for all your feedback, encouragement, and kindness. I love each and every one of you ❤️

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