#soapbox rant

[victusinveritas]

I follow you and I am friends with someone else that I follow as well and lowkey wondering if this blog is actually like a sneaky side blog of theirs and you are also them or if you guys just share characteristics that make it seem like you could both be the same person. Honestly this was mostly about you listing yourself as an older millennial guy and having very well tagged posts that categorize things. I did originally intend to make this an anon message because I’m tired and I feel this probably doesn’t actually make this much sense but I see anon is not an option and I am a little curious, I will follow the long tradition of sending a message when I’m sleepy and then vaguely regretting looking silly tomorrow. Anyways I hope you (both) are having a good night 🌝🐄🐢🐑🍀✨

Thanks for asking! The only other blog I post on is Workers for a Not Safe Paradise, which is just for things that are a little too risqué for a main blog followed by (somehow) 14,000 people. Curious though, because maybe I should follow them too, what this other blog is [I made this typo and now I have to keep it for punishment and presumed penance, I haven't had my tea yet, lay off.]?

In which an ask takes a turn well into Leftist field: I disabled anonymous asking because I got a surprising amount of hate mail and mail just accusing me of not being antifascist or anarchist enough. And...well, I don't have time for responding to that shit, because I go out in my community and actually do the work of antifascism and helping folks what need it. I'm not a terminally online Leftist, don't have time for campist tendencies, and think pigeonholing yourself to your particular party or group is...just fucking counterproductive, I wouldn't say counterrevolutionary because I really try not to be a cunt and if you're doing something that works for you, that's fucking great, gold star as long as you are not a Maoist, Stalinist, Juche-loving idiot, or support another regime big on giving medicinal lead to folks that don't like them. Also I think a lot of that shit is cosplay of the worst sort. But whatever. Anyway, I've got shit to do, rant over.

[atypeofherb9922]

Is it wrong that sometimes I get mad at people with service dogs?

Now, I know that sounds really wrong, but hear me out before you judge me.

There are all those videos online of dogs attacking service dogs, and that is really messed up to have an unleashed dog that can’t control themselves, but there are also other videos. Videos where a kid is like “oh look a dog!” and doesn’t even reach out to pet it, but the person still yells at them, or the old lady who’s really trying to pull her little tiny dog away from the service dog + person, but just can’t and she’s getting yelled at. There’s also the videos of people’s dogs minding their own business, and just like looking over at the dog and walking along, but they’ve somehow done something to get yelled at, and the worst one where a guy accidentally drops his dogs leash, and is scrambling to get it, but his dog goes over to the service dog to meet them, and he’s still trying to pull his dog away, but he’s getting yelled at too.

I mean, I get that you have to control a dog, but even a well trained dog can still fuck up.

But anyway, I think the worst thing is always the people who are rude for no reason. Someone pointing out a dog doesn’t deserve to be berated. Neither does a group of kids who asks politely to pet the dog, and the person says no, and they go away. The little caption thing is always saying “don’t teach your kids to be bad people like these ones”, but they were polite, and didn’t even touch the dog because the owner said no. Those are the worst ones.

Does this make me a bad person?

Because people need service dogs for valid reasons, and I feel bad for being annoyed sometimes at certain service dog accounts on socials.

I dunno, I feel bad, but I kinda feel like those feelings are valid sometimes?

Edit: I know those people like that are the minority, I’m sorry, it just bother me

[grungekitty-77]

Not that anybody asked, but I think it's important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.

It's a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.

Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.

Let's say you're a parent and your kid is having issues.

Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)

Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that's what shame does!

You can't guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!

If you want it in a simple phrase:

You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can't shame them into being a good person.

[captainjonnitkessler]

I was listening to the "Wellness to QAnon Pipeline" episode of Maintenance Phase, which is as it sounds an episode about how people start off well-meaning and curious and end up drawn into QAnon conspiracy theories, and honestly it mimics a lot of behavior I've seen from the left recently.

Like at its core, QAnon believes that there is an elite class of people who hold all the power and can get away with any number of horrible crimes, because the rest of us are all powerless peasants who are being kept in the dark. The only real difference between them and leftist conspiracy theorists is that QAnon calls the elite class (((globalists))) and leftists call them billionaires, but once you start thinking like that it is SUCH a slippery slope from one to the other. It's incredibly dangerous.

It's stuff like confidently stating that Boeing got away with assassinating whistleblowers even though there's zero evidence and it doesn't even make sense that they would do that. Or insisting that Democrats are intentionally losing elections in order to play up the threat of Republicans in order to get elected, which again makes zero sense. It's insisting that the Democratic party fails on purpose because they are one discrete entity that moves in perfect unison and not, like, thousands and thousands of people with different ideas and goals who sometimes work at cross purposes. It's insisting that the reason American healthcare is bad is because the CEOs are all just evil megalomaniacs hitting the "deny care" button repeatedly, instead of understanding that our healthcare is incredibly complicated with a million interlocked parts that all feed into one another. It's insisting that a real progressive will never be elected because "they" won't let that happen, when there is zero evidence that those progressive candidates ever had any real support within the electorate.

It is - basically - the idea that bad things happen because Bad People are doing Bad Things, and the refusal to admit that sometimes bad things happen because of an incredibly complex web of causes and effects that can't be predicted or controlled.

And it's not like there's not any truth to it. Obviously healthcare and pharmaceutical companies put profits over human lives. Obviously billionaires and corporations interfere in politics. But ultimately most things are just really complicated, and anyone who's trying to sell you a fantasy that it's just the Bad People who are causing problems and all we need to do is get rid of them and let The Will of the People take over is either lying to you or is dangerously misinformed. Use your critical thinking, be a skeptic, and don't be blinded by people promising to sell you simple solutions that feel good.

[ratislatis]

I'll find you. Wait for me.

hee hee hoo hoo AUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PAIN PAIN SUFFERING PAIN IN ALL DIRECTIONS!!!! TO HELL WITH IT (LITERALLY)!!!!!!!!!

[dollypopup]

honestly, I think the reason the last few episodes of S3 made me so upset as a Polin fan was that they didn't wrap up any growth from Pen or from Colin in regards to their character flaws to have them gel as a cohesive unit. They still felt very much. . .alone, to me, in those last few episodes. Here are two people who really are soulmates on main, able and willing to help the other become a better person, and I don't feel that the season delivered in that regard. now I'm open to this discussion, but I feel like part 2 really lost the plot in regards to romance because they didn't have a solid grasp on 1: who the characters are, and 2: what the appeal of them as a couple IS

colin's flaws in the show are not the same as his flaws in the book, but they almost treated him like they were. where in the book, his main flaws are his temper and being a flake, in the show, Colin doesn't really get angry. Not in the way his book counterpart does. And Colin is not flakey, either. If anything, he runs heartfirst into his problems. And other people's. His travels aren't necessarily an escape: they're to complete his education. Now, Colin DOES look for escape, but in other ways: drink, drugs, rotting in bed (god, what a relatable king), but his travels? I don't see that. Yeah, he needed distance after S1 to heal over heartbreak, but that's not the primary goal. And the second go around, he's not running away from anything, either.

In fact, everything about Colin points to the fact that he's the opposite from his book counterpart in this sense. Please keep in mind- he is ONLY 22. He essentially did the regency equivalent of getting a bachelor's degree after two years of study abroad and then got married to his childhood best friend right whilst he published his thesis (the travel logs). Unlike in the books, PEN is the one who runs away. She offers up annulment (that Colin refuses), she resigns to paying off Cressida (whilst he goes to talk to her), she literally races off to her carriage to cry and go home (and he chases after her). Colin does NOT have the character flaw of flaking out, which means him sticking around, staying through everything, is not symptomatic of his character growth, but just an inherit character trait of his.

No, Colin was never looking for escape. And he wasn't even necessarily looking for MEANING.

He was always, from the first moment we met him, looking for himself.

Colin's main character flaw in the show is his confusion and insecurity of self. Not only in his arc of trying to parse out what it means to be a man of his society, fighting against and trying to meet gender expectations, trying to be someone others listen to and care about, but also his general selflessness. Colin does everything with very little regard for his own well-being. Colin doesn't care about being humiliated or looking like a fool, he runs after Penelope regardless. Multiple times. Colin refuses her annulment yes because he loves her and wants to stay, but also because he cannot leave her to her lonesome, even if he goes down with her. Even with Marina, Colin would have married her if she was honest, his own happiness not even a consideration. His own feelings, his own emotions, come secondary. Thus is the plight of the chronic people pleaser.

And at the end of the show, he doesn't crack through that. Even when, arguably, Penelope is the best person to help him do so. Not only because Penelope is in the habit of putting herself first (which, frankly, she should be doing and I applaud her for. When she's asked who Whistledown was meant to protect and she answered 'Me', I think that was the most honest she'd ever been, and probably when I respected her the most), but also because she has had the buildup in Polin of being the stable one. The one who fell first. The one who doodled love notes in her diary and had stars in her eyes whenever she talked to him. What's that one quote? Someone who thinks they're hard to love being with someone who loves them like breathing? If there's ANYONE who could convince Colin to consider himself more, it's Penelope 'What of him? What of Colin?' Featherington.

But then. . .she doesn't. And so he doesn't. The last speech is that he is happy to stand off to the side and soak up a bit of her light.

Which, let's not parse words here, Chat, he has BEEN doing. Colin is not an arrogant character who takes up all the spotlight. He has ALWAYS existed on the outskirts. By the end of the season, he continues to.

Which takes us then to Penelope, who also ends very similarly to how she began. Penelope's main flaw is not that she considers herself above or before others (again, I think putting herself first is, ultimately, good!), but rather that she does not trust anyone to help her. As someone who has learned to be hyper-independent, mostly as a trauma response, I understand her. But I still think it was the wrong move not to challenge that.

Half the appeal of a partnership is that you can lean on someone else. That you no longer have to do things all by your lonesome. That someone is there to confide in, to support, to take some of that weight, to depend on. Colin is the PERFECT person for Penelope to learn to lean on others with. She does not do so with Eloise. She does not do so with her family. But Penelope in the previous seasons LIKED that Colin would do things for her. She LIKED that she didn't have to do things all on her own. That Colin would defend her, or think of her. Compliment her and support her and ask her questions and encourage her to open up. That he went to bat for her with Jack. That he wrote her letters. Colin made Penelope feel special because the way he loved her made her feel SEEN. His love helped to soften her. There is something so unyielding sweet in the knowledge that this woman who has clawed her way to notoriety and safety and freedom was all but skipping down her hallway in girlish glee after he danced with her. I LIKED that. I LIKE the fact that she can find ease with him. That she doesn't HAVE TO be strong.

But then in S3, they decided to lean even more into her hyperindependence, to the point where I am ASTONISHED it didn't shoot her further in the foot. Penelope informs the Queen she's LW alone (which was HER choice), Penelope sleeps alone in her marriage bed and doesn't reach out to him, Penelope makes all the big decisions alone, Penelope tells Colin she does not need him to do anything for her.

Yeah yeah, 'he feels like he needs to do things to earn love and she's telling him he's enough just as who he is'- but part of who Colin is IS being useful. He LIKES doing things for others. He LIKES feeling accomplished because he assisted someone.

Doesn't. . .everyone? Is that not a hallmark of a caring person? And isn't a sign of vulnerability, you know, that thing we NEED if we're going to have a relationship with someone. . .letting them? Letting them love us? Letting them care for us?

There are a lot of things I think S3 did well, but the main problem for me will always be that the core of Polin as a unit was missing. The appeal was ALWAYS about 'these two people are perfect for each other because they're so alike but they also CHALLENGE one another'. Who better to challenge Penelope's hyper-independence than Colin? Colin who looks out for her, Colin who loves to uplift her, Colin who wants to love openly and loudly? And who better to challenge Colin's self-disregard than Penelope? Penelope who considered him when no one else would, Penelope who wrote him more letters than anyone else, Penelope who listens?

Instead, the version of them we got in S3 landed so. . .flat, to me. Yeah, the 'and everyone clapped' ending was ick. Yeah, the editing was sloppy and Benedict's never ending threesome felt like I was in purgatory being punished for some sin or another. But at the end of the day, the thing I wanted, and that would make the two of them really shine as a couple, was seeing Pen and Colin become POLIN. Better because they're together. A team.

They never really became one, imo. And that's infuriating because the opportunity for it was RIGHT THERE. Polin is a golden opportunity couple. Guaranteed happy ever after, complex characters, multiple seasons to build them up, actors who have off the charts chemistry with each other. They had hours on hours to give us Polin working together toward a common goal. And then. . .didn't?

The character growth wasn't linear. It didn't have to be, of course, but it wasn't in an upward trajectory at the end, and it certainly wasn't a circle, either. It was an ouroboros, eating it's own tail. I will never forgive the writers for that.

[sunshine-in-a-bottle]

How To Be Normal About Winx Club, Bloom's Design And Also Turn The Diaspro/Sky/Bloom Love Triangle Into A Poly Relationship

ok so listen. I did not actually watch the Winx Club in full, my sister watched the series when she was little and I absorbed it through osmosis and sitting with her while she watched it. I could not personally watch it myself as a child because my brain said "its too sharp and pointy and the bodies scare me" so please know that while I know quite a bit, it will not be 100 percent accurate. I just got really insane about the idea of it all of a sudden when I saw an old clip on Youtube and went down the rabbit hole.

I'm normal you can trust me.

ok first of all. Let me explain. The Show is about Bloom. she's sixteen and she hates her parents because theyre her adopted parents and she wants to know her "real" parents. So she's a bitch to them when they get her a bicycle instead of a scooter, because the mean girl at school has a scooter. Truly The Most Selfish Of Middle Class Parents. Her bedroom is also super pretty and she's an artist but also gives highkey athletic vibes, and her parents later just Let Her go to magic school despite knowing nothing about it, like girl you have it good, stop complaining about how poor sad and pathetic you are.

So she meets a fairy in the woods fighting, and then helps defeat them through Sudden Magical Powers, and then Stella convinces Blooms parents that shes a fairy, then more monsters show up, but Stella calls some guys called Specialists, who are Men who Save Them Once And For, proving immediately from the very first episode that this show is not about girl power as much as it thinks it is. Then Bloom gets to go to fairy school. Every fairy is from a planet that specializes in One Thing, a very ridiculous concept but for children's worldbuilding Its Fine I Guess.

Also Bloom, unbeknownst to her was from The Most Powerful Planet Of All, Guardian Of The Most Powerful Thing In The Universe: Dragon Fire, and shes secretly a princess and also apparently fuck her adopted parents, theyre just silly guys who don't know anything

Also like, this is very much a show that does not understand poverty or relate to people who experience poverty, and that makes it very hard not to want to murder it sometimes

Also. this fucking baffled me the first time I read it. like, I sortve get it, Fire can also be representative of Life and forest fires to make way for new growth and all that. BUT STILL

Are you understanding how insane this is. It 100 percent feels like they just wanted to give Bloom the power to heal people. Ah yes, this fire based magic fairy can also revive the dead. She's got the power of Fire and Healing and Sensing Other Peoples Natures And Intentions And Be A Super Empath And Also Share Her Powers With Other People.

I get it, OP protagonist power fantasy. But also none of this relates to the dragon in dragon fire and I'm high key miffed about the whole thing.

The Great Dragon is the creator of the magic dimension and created all magic and then got tired and took a nap on a planet which then became Blooms planet and somehow this gave them a spark of the Dragons Flame.

what the fuck do you mean it has the power to rewrite reality. Why does Bloom need this as a power

the point is, the show both make Bloom ridiculously op, unbalanced, and did so without actually involving the concept of a dragon into her outfits, wings, or identity, even it would have been relatively simple to??? Like Bloom starts out at the very beginning of the show reading books about fairies. Why not also incorporate books about dragons, fantasy in general???

It feels like they didn't consider dragons "feminine enough" to be a part of her designs, which is cowardly. you said dragon flame, give me the fucking dragon.

So to sort of rewrite Bloom a bit, shes got more stereotypically dragon traits??? Like shes Possessive, the fact that her powers are fueled by her emotions is shown a lot more often with having a bit of a temper, she hoards a bit, has a messy sleepy area to show for it, she exhales in a fury and smoke comes out of her nostrils

(ignore the lack of wings and long hair. I got tired. Being normal is exhausting. I also wanted to give her a pretty tulle skirt over the shorts but. exhaustion. normal.)

I was incorporating scales into her outfit, but also I think there should be points where if she reaches a certain breaking point or power level, she can turn into a dragon. like, avatar state level, where she's out of control and relying on instinct and feeling and needs someone to help her Pause. until she gets a better handle on it.

Also I think its really important that Bloom be more in the shape of a Chinese Dragon and not the western one

this is very clearly not western dragon.... Chinese Dragons don't spit fire, they spit water, but considering all the stuff they're doing here already its Fine

also if/when there becomes a case of Dark Bloom (where she's corrupted and evil) we're going to Also make her in her dragon form there, because it feels really fitting

Like, I get it, girls wanted to feel hot and evil. But also DRAGON. HAVE THEY CONSIDERED DRAGON.

ok but let me get into the real meat of why I needed to be insane about this show

so there's this guy called Prince Sky, and his cool team of Hot Men who Save The Main Female Girls.

Except he doesn't want to be Prince Sky while on the team he wants to ignore his responsibilities and just zoom around doing his own thing and also some guy wants to assassinate him??? So he switches identities/names with his retainer, Brandon, and they don't tell anyone.

And of course Bloom falls for the Super Special Prince without realizing, while her Actual Princess Friend dates the fake prince without realizing. Because Bloom needs the Best of the Best and her friends can't have anything better than her according to the narrative

and then theres the reveal and while Stella's pissy with the retainer for lying, Bloom of course is Gasp Shock Blush Oh My A Prince?!

and its so fucking annoying to me personally but like, whatever, its fine. thats not the issue and it makes sense with the Trying To Murder A Prince So He Has To Go Out In Disguise thing

the real issue is that actually, Prince Sky had a fiancee the whole time while dating Bloom, and we're supposed to not be mad at for him for this. Its The Fiancees Fault Actually For Being Spoiled And Demanding And High Class.

and it doesn't even start out that way necessarily!!!! Like, due to Bloom being a little paranoid and fucked up from the previous episode, when she goes to a party and sees the fiancee attending, identifying herself as Prince Sky's Fiancee

Bloom assumes its actually an Evil Trick Thats Evil and gets her alone to attack her. Like this is the first episode you see her, and she's immeadietly given the "bitchy third girl who we hate" treatment. Oh The Lower Class Are SO beneath her and she's SO mean to people.

like yeah, Bloom could have killed an innocent civilian and caused a huge political scandal and upheaval, but shes a bitch so its fine

even when you see the full scene play out, Diaspro is fighting to subdue and defend and not actually cause long term harm!

this is not an offensive spell!!! this is a "stop fucking attacking what the fuck is wrong with you" spell. she uses shields, she goes to Sky for protection.

so like, this shit is getting rewritten. I immediately became obsessed with the concept of this character and this stupid love triangle being poly actually.

THEYRE ALSO CHILDHOOD FRIENDS IN THE ORIGINAL SHOW LIKE WHAT THE HELL??? and all of her appearances up until Sky publicly breaks up with her for Bloom are of her genuinely caring for Sky and trying to be a good girlfriend. she gets a ship to try to get him off the battlefield when shit gets real at some point because dude you are the literal heir to the throne your people need you to not be dead and we're supposed to think he's making a better decision by waving her off and insisting he's fine being in the thick of it. SHES WORRIED ABOUT YOU DUDE.

"your people need you" when shes really saying i need you, like under normal circumstances that shit would be so romantic

but also they try to make his decision look better by her going "let these peasants fight for you, your duty is to rule" Like Oh No Shes Being Rude And Mean Therefore She Can't Possibly Be Right

I hate that trope in kids shows so much

SHE IS WORRIED ABOUT YOUUU

Also there's this weird fucking thing where the show kind of employs all these sexism classism tropes and criticizes them but like, selectively????

arranged marriages are apparently A Big Thing in this show. And Diaspro is someone who was trained from birth to get married. Like imagine how fucked up it must be for this character to have limited agency and no actual choice in who she's marrying, but she's still his friend and she still genuinely loves him and wants him to be safe.

she's already a princess even

like if the marriage to Sky falls through shes still the princess of her own kingdom, she doesn't need Sky to rise in status. He might be the Biggest Royalty, but she's still pretty high on the food chain. Which also bugs me because there's so little depth on the "planet" that both Diaspro and Sky are from, so we have very limited info on how the politics works or how they benefit from getting married.

Also despite the fact that supposedly Sky couldn't stop his arranged marriage to Diaspro and therefore was dating Bloom while being angsty about how he was engaged to someone else

It turns out No! Actually He Could Call It Off The Whole Time! He calls it off publicly in front of his parents and Diaspro and her parents. so he was just. technically cheating on Diaspro the whole time for no reason. and simultaneously making Bloom feel like shit and be very antagonistic to this one woman who was just trying to be normal.

So! Listen! I think they should really lean into her Gemstone Fairy stuff and make her like, a very cold, closed-off goldsmith who's first appearance is her insetting a gem into a ring. She isn't good with people even if she likes creating things for them, she likes Prince Man because, as someone who already knows what she means and what shes like, she doesn't have to go through all the effort of trying to explain herself with him, and its a very comfortable relationship.

When Bloom enters the picture its basically upheaving a very comfortable calm for her and in her mind he'll stop talking to her in favor of his romantic relationship

You could even have the episodes before the lead up have him ignoring calls from her or forgetting to write letters or not answering back

because he's Really Into His Relationship and the current going-ons

And of course when Bloom meets her, Diaspro is not socially savvy enough to even begin to explain this to someone who doesn't already know her

Consider, Diaspro is Autism-coded, who grew up being really bad at social stuff when it wasn't courtly politics. She's blunt and can be seen as rude for being blunt, and cold, closed off because the people around her aren't real theyre just Masks playing the social game, and she is rarely able to experience genuine friendship and love with people who aren't Sky.

especially because like, canonically her parents are really shitting who were really pushing the arranged marriage for Money and Power

and like, she's the fairy of gemstones but thats never actually explored in canon because nothing about this character ever gets to be anything but Jealous Bitch archetype. So instead her family specializes in goldsmithing, and while there was some debate about whether she should learn the family craft because "its not really wifely", they still ended up going for it because Important To Inheirit The Business.

And she loves goldsmithing. She loves being able to work with metals, shaping them, this work that is both delicate and precise but also requires a firm steady hand with force. She gets to be creative and feel proud and accomplished when she finishes a piece, in a way she doesn't when doing embroidery or working a room of people.

And Sky has known her since they were like ten, running the same noble circles with busy parents trying to set up their futures. But theyre still young, and Sky has ADHD and wants to Zoom and Run and Climb, and Dia scolds him and follows him around and demands they play games, and theyre comfortable. This relationship is the one thing Dia has been promised, and to her its a happy, soft dream where she finally doesn't have to be near her parents anymore. She can set up her own little personal workshop in the castle, help Sky with paperwork, do some interior decorating, and will finally not have to be masking almost every hour of every day, because Sky likes her the way she is.

And then Sky goes to Cool Specialist School to Be A Warrior and also theres a crime lord who wants him dead and keeps trying to murder him

And thats!!! Mildly concerning to Diaspro. Just A Bit. But she can't really do much as a civilian and he's insisting he'll be fine, so she just writes to him a lot and calls him frequently to make sure He Hasn't Suddenly Gotten Kidnapped And Murdered.

And Sky keeps up with it and answers her calls and its all good! And then the actual show starts ramping up and he gets distracted with all the murder and evil happening, and then oh he gets a little crush on Bloom, and his ADHD himbo ass starts going "ill answer that later tonight" and then Later Tonight turns into a month

the wiki points out that Prince Man already struggles with attending and absorbing his royal lessons so I felt like this was pretty reasonable and in character and a lot more sympathetic than "oh I just didn't tell you for Reasons and now I'm going to be a cheating bastard for no reason and make you complicit in this for like a whole ass season or two"

while also pretending he was still a good guy for it???

So Diaspro gets fucking Stressed and shows up to the school, full regal attire, after like a month or two of radio silence, going "thank god you're alive, now why the fuck haven't you been responding"

Which I think is very fair and reasonable when you're dating

And Bloom is immediately Fire And Brimstone Dragon Possessive Don't Talk To Him Like That, and getting pissy about how "clingy" Diaspro is, very not chill about her situationship apparently having been engaged since he was 12.

Diaspro meanwhile is Mildly Stressed about her Safe Person having been MIA for a hot minute, and expressing all of her worry through a persnickety attitude that Sky is incredibly fond of. When Bloom meets her, Diaspro is not socially savvy enough to even begin to explain her behavior to someone who doesn't already know her.

And Sky is Very Oblivious to the weird vibes between Bloom and and Dia. He's happy to see her QPR and is very apologetic about forgetting to make sure to tell her he did not die in a fire and end up in a coffin

And Dia is Bitchy and Blunt, and Bloom is Being A Dragon, and Bloom ends up attacking her because Bloom Has No Chill At Fucking All (its great)

Until Sky breaks it up and apologizes for keeping his identity a secret to Bloom and also making her feel led on when he's freaking halfway married. The entire episode is Sky assuming that everythings fine until at the very end he realizes that actually he needs to focus on things besides whats right in front of his nose

Because if we're really going to make "man who ignores his duties all the time" actually end up king in the end, I want there to be some actual character development where he learns how to be responsible and not 16 years old until he's in his 60s

But also! Very Important

(I drew this. In a fit of normalness. Don't look at me. instead look at the ring she's got. )

Consider, in the opening scene of this episode, before she goes out into her little ship to go visit Sky, she's setting a jewel and finishing fully enchanting it. in her family workshop, likely in the dead of night.

(because she's supposed to be a perfect demure lady and this is very much not what ladies do. running off after their future husbands and making a scene like this)

and at the end of this episode she gives the ring to Sky. its a Mega Powerful protection ring thats supposed to keep him from getting oneshot and murdered. She made it herself. The jewel has her family crest

She really does want to marry him. Not because of money or power, but because she likes him for who he is. and she was hoping that maybe she could have used the ring as her own little proposal that wasn't so… public fanfare arranged and impersonal

This Is How She Can Protect Him, even if she's not a fighter herself

The ring ends up saving Sky's life- a blow in a Final Boss Battle should have killed him, but the ring simply put all its strength into protecting him, breaking in the process. He feels really terrible about it, especially when Diaspro could Sense it breaking and she was Panicking because what the fuck was he out doing.

Also there's a lot of jealousy issues with Bloom about the ring. I think, when Diaspro originally finds out Sky wants to date Bloom, she waves her hand and goes "sure, you have can another partner" because like, they were childhood friends who are Engaged For Legal Reasons, and even if sometimes Dia does have a small fear in her heart that Sky will get bored with her someday and also maybe fuck off from the Kingdom to go be a mercenary on the other side of the galaxy somewhere- him dating someone isn't going to mean him leaving her. It was his own silly dumb adhd fault for forgetting to answer her letters, not another girls attention.

But also Bloom is somewhat uncomfortable with the arrangement but Doesn't Want To Let Go Of Sky Because She Cares About Him. So when Sky is given the ring, with obvious care and dedication and intimacy, Bloom feels Every Emotion Ever About It.

Thats genuine, thats sweet and romantic and loving and its the kind of thing Bloom always kind of wanted. Its both jealousy that someone has Sky but also the insecurity of Is That Devotion Something That She Can Live Up To, Can She Be That Loving Of A Partner, but also the Yearning for something like that. To have that kind of intimacy

And it gets even worse when the rest of the visit is Bloom and Dia bonding. She gets to see where Dia works, the things she does, learns about her relationship with her parents, and the genuine care Dia puts into her craft, and how much Sky means to her.

So Bloom, who had been, at the start of this, kind of hoping that Dia and Sky's engagement would fall through, is now warm to this flawed but good individual. And it's Conflicting. She doesn't want Dia to get hurt or lose Sky. But. But. Bloom wants Sky to be Hers. But. Dia is her friend now, so already somewhat Hers, too.

And then the jealousy of Sky having a ring from a Not Bloom Person shifts a little into wishing Dia could have given her such a precious meaningful gift like that. Because Sky always has Diaspros attention, and now that Bloom has had a taste of Dias focus, it's hard not to want to keep it. And I think Bloom becomes really abnormal about Sky and Diaspro both. And everyone thinks it's just jealousy love triangle bullshit. But Its The Bloomisms, The Dragonisms

Just. Please imagine Bloom starting out a little glaring and unsure as she's left alone with Diaspro for the first time since they first met. And Diaspro introduces her to the family business, walks her through this bridge where magical machines are messing with the lava-like substance below. And Bloom being so amazed and wowed and Diaspro going from hiding her own unsureness behind an uncaring facade to having a lot of Pride in her work and being eager to show Bloom her work and to earn Praise.

Also I just like the imagery of Diaspro asking Bloom to help undo her corset, because they're friends now and Dia has no shame about her body and since she's supposed to be taking a break from her work, she can allow herself to put on something loose and flowy

And Bloom gets red cheeks and feels a little insane about seeing Diaspros bare back muscles flexing.

(also also Metal Is Forged In Fire, and Dia is a goldsmith and and-)

I think when Bloom goes insane with Magical Dragon Power (because supposedly its the most powerful force in the universe why isn't she going mad) that Diaspro is one of the only people who isn't afraid, who can walk through the flames and cup Blooms cheeks and tell her to Come Back Now

she's the only one who's been able to successfully do it

and I think this specific incident happens when Sky is like, almost fatally injured and really fucked up and Bloom snaps about it and goes Full On Dragon Murder Anyone Who Looks At Her Wrong Don't Touch Him Don't Touch My Treasures

but Dia, her pretty jewel, tells her she needs to come back, and Dragon Bloom is a Very Good Dragon and will listen to her.

also Bloom should purr, whether shes a dragon or not.

[mayberrycryptid]

I agree with all but the first point. I keep hearing the same tired old half-truths being trotted out, so--

**dusts off my soapbox**

1. Daniel and Grace's demands were heard and they were offered a deal of only 15 percent less than Alex and Scott. They insisted that was still too low. Um.... wtf? That was probably $30,000 to $45,000 less an episode. Which was a very generous offer considering actual screen time.

2. Daniel and Grace have both implied in multiple interviews that they were disappointed that Alex and Scott didn't go on strike to support them, and it has affected their friendships. Again, wtf?

400 people worked on H50--and many of those were Asian and Hawai'an. Good jobs are hard to find in tourist economy and COL tends to be high in tourist places.

So, let me get this straight. Scott and Alex could choose 400 jobs, and the Asian and Hawai'ians families that needed those jobs or--

or they could toss everyone onto the unemployment line because Grace (wealthy actress born with a silver spoon in her mouth) and Daniel (wealthy actor and son of a doctor) 'deserved' 30k to 45k more an episode for less screen time.

I love Chin and Kono, but honestly (warning! unpopular opinion) Grace and Daniel are just rich, entitled brats.

And finally (no I am not done yet), in a recent interview, Scott made a casual mention that one of the show's camera guys was in LA recently, and stayed with him. So Scott is still taking care of his old crew. And Alex is still fundraising for Hawai'ian organizations. And Scott is also still volunteering to surf with disabled people.

What would the world look like if more of us followed Scott and Alex's example, and cared about minorities that don't have a microphone and money?🤔

Things I like about HAWAII 5-0

the original cast with Kono and Chin: It wasn't the same without them and it sucks that the studios denied fair pay for their non-white main actors. Massive L for a show being diversity inclined.

the "Mcdanno" bromance: Do I need to say more ? Two idiots going after bad guys.

the way it's basically a meet up reunion for actors from previous projects such as Heroes, LOST, Sex And The City

the diversity: the show displays great respect for Hawaii's traditions and it also doesn't shy away from the local spoken language. As someone from Europe, the tidbits of informations are cool.

the location: I mean it just looks gorgeous. Although I can't help wonder how they managed all that running and stunts under such humidity and heat.

the dialogues and storylines: kinda ridiculous, kinda over the top, very entertaining, 100% action packed and always funny. I'm usually not into such television program but this is a fun one to keep up with. Danno delivers the funniest bits, it wouldn't work without him.

**worth noting i have seen most of the show but got yet to finish it.

ok if you made it to the end of my rambling, thanks for reading!

[glass-dagger]

Sometimes I feel out of place in the acotar fandom because I actually like all the characters…

I hate this nests vs. rhys debate. I’m tired of people hating on cassian for simply being having a relationship with both characters and never picking the “right side”. Characters are allowed to be complex. Why are y’all so black and white?

Yes, Nesta was a bitch but she was also grieving and traumatized. She needed help and now she’s trying to be better.

Yes, Rhysand was a dick but he was also trying to protect his family. He made mistakes out of fear and anger and he realized this.

Yes, Cassian is mated to Nesta but he has been best friends with Rhys for centuries and he’s his High Lord. He can defend and support Nesta but also respect and agree with Rhys without picking sides. Yes, you should support your partner first but he’s shouldn’t have to agree with everything she does or says especially if it’s wrong or disrespects someone he considers his brother.

And no, their actions shouldn’t be excused but y’all literally call them evil for doing things that are morally gray and leave no room for nuance.

And don’t even get me started on the elriel vs. elucien/gwynriel ship wars like stop harassing each other. Ship who you want and leave people alone. Why are you going out of your way to hate on people of the opposing ship? You aren’t going to convince them to switch sides, especially if you’re insulting them. Mind your business.

I love having deeper discussions about characters’ actions and stuff like that but it should never be a method to hate on other people and their opinions. And it’s fine to dislike characters but if you hate the main characters to the point that you are demonizing them then why are you here?

This is literally a book series about faeries like ITS NOT THAT FUCKING DEEP

[victusinveritas]

Comment on Facebook on a thread that is dumping on Corey Booker for being a Liberal rather than supporting Every Damn Cause the Farther Left Wants (most of which are good causes, but have trouble gaining traction politically). Can we not just ride the resistance train and not stop at every station to perform a purity test or we will NEVER prevail! Obviously he’s far from the best. But he did SOMETHING, which is better than most in power have done. It’s a start. We can praise these actions without putting him on a pedestal. When the opposition is destroying the country in record time, we cannot stop to make sure everyone that’s furthering the cause is a saint. As long as they’re contributing, they’re moving us forward.

-- This is the thing of it: Purity tests will always lead to more division. Yeah, Liberals suck, liberals suck, they're center right at best...but they're also who we have to work with until we can get effective Lefties in government. And we can't do that because we can't even agree on a candidate--not Bernie (great but just not listened to outside of Vermont--has basically achieved Old Man Yells at Cloud status), certainly not Jill Stein (a Russian asset clear as day who only pops up at election time as a Green/Libertarian spoiler supported by the Worst People you'll hang out with anyway because their beer is decent, they have a grill, and they hate Trump) and not AOC (inexperienced, yada yada). Once we get a Liberal/liberal majority, we can worry about slowly bending the arc of progress towards where we want it to point. In the meantime, if you're not out there doing things, all the talk online is just a fart in a windstorm--I'm sure you feel better having let it out, but it doesn't move shit. Every single fucking actually active in meatspace leftie I've talked to (and I've talked to a fuckload of them thanks to volunteering, showing up, doing what I can, really broadened the fuck out of my narrow, purity testing horizons) has said the same thing: we have to work with the Democrats and FUCKING vote. So many goddamn Instagram-Anarchists I saw before the election urging people not to vote for Kopmala have vanished post-election, and the ones that remain are going off the deep end (Nyx Erinyes on Facebook, for instance). Conclusion: either they were well-done Russian bots pushing folks to stay home or they were useful idiots. And a lot of the left fell for it hook, line, and sinker, and are still in that 'voting does nothing' mentality. Voting does nothing if you don't do it at all. Like, we might have to get behind a centrist candidate who can get something done, Gretchen Whitmer and Pete Buttigieg would do the numbers in a lot of places (probably not enough to win anything but at least they can fucking talk and get some of the people in the middle as well as the reasonably left, which was Kamala's problem aside from [all the other stuff, she should have been a non-starter, but she started, she failed, here we are with full fascism], etc. And don't get me started on Tankies (seriously, I've got a laundry list of issues with them, they're not as bad as Kissinger but they're not bloodless and most of them are under 25 so I kind of discount their opinions anyway: hell, I was a Trotskyist until 25, when I realized how awesome anarchism was, but small scale anarchy, communalism, that sorta shit, not big A Anarchy, which, again, has purity tests. But that's a different, longer, crazier rant. If you've read this far and haven't vomited from vertigo and jerkiness, I'm impressed. If you've read this far and want to argue, go ahead but I'll probably just shrug because (this includes my thoughts and opinions too) I honestly don't care what ya think, the internet is just wires, and unless you are in my community, your thoughts don't really carry that much water. Listening to: Toxicity by System of a Down

Reading: The Rigor of Angels by William Egginton and Toll the Hounds (Malazan Book of the Fallen Book 8) by Steven Erikson. Just finished: Diary of a Man in Despair by Friedrich Reck-Malleczewen and Victor Serge's later notebooks (NYRB edition).

[tigerbears]

Homestuck Spoilers Out of Context.

[hearts-hunger]

the thing about tlou hbo's portrayal of joel and ellie is that it feels very much like a way to retcon their characters to make tlou2/the second season of the show seem even remotely believable.

you have to have ellie be snarky and aggressive and bitchy from the get go for it to make sense that she becomes cold and distant and hateful in the second game/season. because an innocent eager child who loves and trusts very easily is not realistically going to become a closed off loner spree killer. so you change her character and try to show that she was always angry and violent and closed off from affection and hope and kindness. she was never vulnerable and childlike. she was never obedient to adults or eager to please. she was never scared and wanting a hand to hold. she was always aloof, never cared about making people like her. she was always domineering, rude, vengeful, and mean-spirited.

you have to nerf joel's character too, because ellie can't be subject to a disciplined, stoic, consistent, trustworthy authority figure. because it makes no sense for her to be a feral little freak if she has a guardian who takes care of her, praises her efforts to please and obey him, is one hundred percent of the time a dependable and stable and competent adult. so you make him someone ellie would be weak and stupid to love, someone who is emotionally volatile, subject to intense mood swings of aggression, panic, grief, someone who is impulsive and shown from the first moment to be led by the people around him. you make joel into a needy, guts-spilling-out kind of person who parentifies this oddly girlboss child who knows better than him, fights better than him, and seems to not really need him. you make joel a crumbling mess who can’t really protect ellie because he's too busy crying or beating someone to death in a haze of the emotion that rules him. you make him into someone who isn't strong enough to be her safe place, who can't rescue her, who can't be a father to her.

the dynamic of tlou1 only works with a kind, gruff, adult who actually does know better than the eager, genuine kid who wiggles her way into the adult's heart. when it's a little girl softening the heart of a father who's forgotten how to love and hope but just needs a reminder. when it's a man who does right by this child because he knows what's in her best interest and has the strength of will to do it.

it doesn't work if it's a miserable, unwieldy adult who needs to learn some life skills from the prickly, aggressive kid who somehow gets the adult to use his emotional volatility to kill for her. when it's a match and a fuse just waiting to be lit. when it's some all-wise teenage punk and a weepy grownup with no ability to make the right decision because he's too in his own head. when the kid knows best and the adult screws it up so bad that the foolproof plan to save the world goes completely to hell.

now, tlou2 works with that dynamic — the whole narrative of the second game blames joel for his selfishness and weakness and nails ellie to the wall for her violence and coldness. joel fucked everything up because he was a blubbering, uncontrollable, panic-ridden idiot who wasn't strong enough to make the necessary sacrifice. ellie should have died on that operating table like she knew she needed to, because the world would be a better place, because the only thing she's capable of in life is revenge, hatred, betrayal, sarcasm, iciness, anger, sharpness of tongue and sharpness of blade. she is not hopeful or good or loving or trusting or open hearted. she deserved to die for everyone else, and now that she didn't, we all get to suffer and so does she. she's a shitty person who doesn't want to be better, even as a kid, and there's no changing her. too bad she missed her one chance to make a positive impact on the world because of some selfish moron who can barely function because of his emotional distress.

the problem is that the dynamic needed for the second game’s message to work is just not present in the first game. joel is a man's man, a good father, a strong person mentally and physically. ellie is a kindhearted child, one who strives to please joel and make him like her, a spunky and likeable little girl. but the creators of the first game hate that now, apparently, or look down on it as naive and unrealistic. even though they made it. and i think their solution is to retcon the first game's story with the show, and just straight up attempt to gaslight audiences into thinking that's all the first game ever was. all the things you liked about the first game? they suck and so do you. fuck you for liking them and wanting them reflected in the show. truly.

[bring-forth-his-sac]

can anyone who’s watched the latest dead city episode let me know wtf went down between Negan and Annie?

I haven’t watched this season yet but neeeeeeeeeeed to know💀

[arzzyxi]

II 18 SPOILERS:

Yuri so won indeed

HELL YEAHH WE GOT SO MANY GAYS NOWWW YAAAYYAYYAYAYAYYAYA

-Soap being cute and threatening Taco's existence is so cute AUGHH

-you couldn't score Pickle but you got tall dark sexy Microphone bbg

-CAN'T BELIEVE SHE HAS A TYPE, TACO LIKES TALL PEOPLE LMAOO

-Look at mic comforting her gf grieving her dead parent ☹️☹️

I love taco look at her, she's no longer isolated and mean. She's softened by love like she looks so happy to be there, to no longer hide in the shadows ☹️☹️

Reminds me of Rio Romeo's "Butch 4 Butch" "Inarticulation" "Missus piano" "Twice" "Nothings new" or basically any of her songs bcz it's literally them

+ (if you haven't heard of her then CHECK HER OUT SHE'S SO COOL)

Shes such an incredibly written character and she was done justice in the finale AUGHH , she so won in the end

(minus pickle but small steps :DD)

[mortal-ethos]

Idk when the switch happened that even professional psych and medical sites are saying sympathy is bad thing, but I just want to say here.

It's not a fucking bad thing. Empathy isn't inherently better than sympathy. Just because someone is empathetic rather than sympathetic to your plight, doesn't make it any better or worse. Doesn't make it less likely to cause a selfish response.

Idk when or who decided sympathy was "one's relief in not having the same problem as another," because that's not what it fucking means.

It means you understood the person's feelings, you understand why they're happening, and you feel concern for them.

Empathy means you actively feel the same emotions the other person is feeling from their issue, possibly from having a previous similar experience.

I've seen empathy over the last few years consistently lose its actual fucking meaning on social media, and to see sympathy be fucking completely disregarded and demonized when it is a PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE WAY TO FEEL when someone else is experiencing stress, boils my blood.

Sympathy does not mean you pity someone, it doesn't mean you look down on them, it doesn't mean you hold some position of power over them. Empathy does not mean you are automatically compassionate and kind and supportive and want to help.

People who are empathetic may be so to the extent that they want nothing to do with your problem because they feel it so strongly. And the way I continue to see these terms treated just makes me think that it's targeted against people that don't experience emotion the same way, aka people with mental illnesses or neurodivergent people.

Sympathy is not a bad thing to have. Empathy is not a bad thing to have. Apathy is not a bad thing to have. What matters is how you treat people, and your own feelings in regards to someone else's doesn't automatically spell out how you will react when someone needs support.

[codypunk]

I want to say I'm annoyed that wwe thinks it's fans are stupid and don't remember pre-existing lore but then I log onto twitter and realize that they're right so. whatever guess I'll fuck myself