#source: drawn to life for all discord

[twisting-echo]

Why I ship Snow White and Hades?

Before we get into this, I will state again that I am aware of Snow White's canon age, so I have her aged up to 18 in my headcanon.

(And whatever is blue and underlined is a link!)

I've said some of this before on an anonymous ask, but I'm going to further elaborate.

In my headcanon, I ship Snow White and Hades because I'm attracted to their chemistry and emotional connection. I'm also a sucker for May-December romances and height differences. In my headcanon, Hades is 6'5" and Snow White is 5'1". Their relationship dynamic is heavily inspired by Fluttershy x Discord (Fluttercord).

Also considering that in Greek mythology, Hades' wife is Persephone, who is the goddess of spring, nature, flowers, deer, death, and reincarnation, these are all things that coincide with Snow White too well.

The symbolic connections between Snow White and Persephone consuming the poisoned apple and the pomegranate are because, in both tales, the fruit represents temptation and hidden consequences.

The apple offered to Snow White by the evil queen is a direct reference to the biblical story of Eve and the forbidden fruit. Snow White’s apparent death after consuming the poisoned apple parallels the concept of resurrection. She is revived by true love’s kiss, symbolizing rebirth and redemption. 

In Greek mythology, Hades gave Persephone the pomegranate seeds while she was in the Underworld. The story goes that after Hades abducted Persephone, she became his queen in the realm of the dead. During her time there, she ate six pomegranate seeds. This act bound her to the Underworld, ensuring her return each year. As a result, Persephone spends part of the year with Hades (autumn and winter) and the other part with her mother Demeter (spring and summer). The pomegranate thus symbolizes her connection to both life and death. 

They both ate the fruit given to them as gifts, not knowing the consequences.

Since Hades isn't married to a Persephone of his own, and considering how he behaved towards Snow White in the book Mirrorverse: Pure of Heart, let's just say Hades clearly has a type~ 😏

In my Disney Mirrorverse headcanon, Snow White and Hades visit each other a lot in their respective universes. Hades will have coffee, tea, and other baked goods with Snow White at her cottage. He'll watch/help her pick flowers and spend time with the woodland creatures. They also knit together as a relaxing pastime while they converse. (Hades can knit! I've seen him do it in the episode Hercules and the Tapestry of Fate!)

Snow White will bring him cookies, cake, and coffee while he's having meetings with the other Disney villains and Greek mythology characters in the underworld. She also helps keep track of the souls that newly arrive and tries to soothe them the best way that she can. Snow White is also allowed entry to the Elysian Fields despite being alive, and she and Hades will indulge in whatever they enjoy together there.

When I made Hades and Snow White start to take a romantic interest in each other, I found their relationship to be quite an intriguing mix of contrasts and complements. Below, I listed some aspects they appreciate about each other:

Hades’ Perspective:

Snow White’s Kindness: Hades, being the god of the underworld, finds Snow White’s pure-hearted kindness and compassion refreshing and endearing. Her ability to see the good in everyone could soften his often-cynical outlook.

Innocence and Purity: Snow White’s innocence and purity are a source of fascination for Hades, who is surrounded by darkness and souls. Her light brings a sense of balance to his life.

Resilience: Despite her gentle nature, Snow White has shown resilience and strength in the face of adversity. Hades admires her inner strength and determination.

Snow White’s Perspective:

Hades’ Wit and Charm: Hades is known for his sharp wit and charm. Snow White is drawn to his charismatic personality and finds his humor delightful.

Protective Nature: Despite his dark exterior, Hades has a protective side, especially towards those he cares about. Snow White appreciates his loyalty and the sense of security he provides.

Depth and Complexity: Snow White is intrigued by Hades’ complex personality and the layers beneath his godly facade. His depth is something she finds fascinating and worth exploring.

Their relationship is a blend of light and dark, bringing out the best in each other while navigating their differences.

Everyone knows that Snow White suffered an intense anxiety attack caused by the huntsman, who is overcome by moral guilt and spares her life, but the damage is done. Snow White is faced with two terrible truths: the queen wants her dead, and she no longer has a place to live. She must survive in the forest without food or means to support herself. This sudden shift triggers an anxiety attack, which is shown metaphorically throughout the horrific "dark forest" scene. In other words, the trees were not her friends when she was having a panic attack. How do you guys think Hades reacted when Snowie told him what she went through?

Let's just say he'd be prepared to wipe out an entire forest for her if she'd let him. But she wouldn't, because she'd remind him that the forest is the home for all of the woodland animals and that she actually likes trees, despite what happened; trees are important. In other words, "Only Snow White can prevent forest fires."

Speaking of woodland animals, it's time to talk about two of my favorite little silly billies. For the record, I love the platonic love that Snow White, Pain, and Panic share. It's too precious to me! They love her and she adores them! She is their mommy and they are her babies! They would do anything for her and she for them. X3

Anyway, Pain and Panic's close friendship with Snow White. Their quirky personalities add some chaos to her peaceful life. These silly imps are known for their shape-shifting abilities and their loyalty (albeit reluctant) to Hades. And Snow White's gentle and nurturing nature would likely shine through. Here's how their friendship plays out:

Pain and Panic's Perspective:

Gentle Touch and Kind Words: Snow White, with her gentle demeanor and kind heart, approaches Pain and Panic. They’ve only ever known Hades’ wrath, so when she offers a hug or a comforting word, they freeze in shock. Their shapeshifting abilities momentarily falter as they process this unexpected kindness. It’s like a splash of cold water on their fiery, chaotic existence. Over time, Snow White’s consistent kindness begins to chip away at their skepticism. Maybe she genuinely cares. Maybe there’s no ulterior motive. Slowly, they allow themselves to lean into her touch and accept her words. It’s like a fragile plant unfurling after a long winter. Pain and Panic might not express it outright, but gratitude blooms within them. They steal glances at Snow White when she’s not looking, wondering how someone so pure can exist. Maybe, just maybe, they deserve this kindness—even if it feels foreign. 

Shape-Shifting Shenanigans: Pain and Panic transform into various creatures, specifically a rabbit, a chipmunk, and birds, to comfort her or make her laugh. They also use these forms to assist her with chores and cooking. They even disguise themselves as dwarfs to join her in the mine. 

Comedic Relief: Snow White's gentle nature clashes with their mischievous antics. They'd accidentally spill things, knock things over, trip over their own tails, and create chaos in her cottage. Snow White would patiently clean up after them, giggling at their clumsiness and finding them endearing. Snow White finds joy in their company. Their slapstick antics amuse her. She laughs when they squabble over disguises. Their friendship lightens her burden.

Loyal Protectors: Despite their flaws, Pain and Panic would fiercely defend Snow White. If the Evil Queen sends poisoned apples, they'd be there to warn her or even take the bite themselves (only to regenerate, of course).

Inventive Solutions: Need a quick escape from the Queen's huntsmen? Panic could turn into the torso of a buck and Pain into the rump, whisking Snow White away. Their unconventional methods would keep her safe. Plus, they'd make a noble steed for her and gallop around the forest.

Copyrighted Merchandise Enthusiasts: Pain and Panic's love for copyrighted merchandise would lead to quirky gifts. Imagine Snow White receiving a "Magic Mirror" or a "Poison Apple" mug from Panic and a "Fairest of Them All" or a "I'm Grumpy Deal with It" T-shirt from Pain. They'd enjoy their Disney merch together.

Snow White's Perspective:

Motherly Care: Snow White treats Pain and Panic like her own little imps. She fusses over their well-being, ensuring that they wash their hands before every meal, that they eat their veggies, and that they get enough rest (even though they're immortal). Imagine her tucking them into bed with tiny handknit blankets. (She actually lets them sleep with her in her bed as her cuddle buddies.)

Kindness and Patience: When Pain accidentally shape-shifts into a clumsy creature, Snow White would giggle and help him regain his form. She'd patiently listen to Panic's anxious rants and offer soothing words.

Tea Parties: Snow White's cottage would host delightful tea parties. Pain would spill tea on the tablecloth, and Panic would fret about staining it. Snow White would laugh, saying, "It's just tea, my dear imps!"

Protective Instincts: Snow White becomes fiercely protective. When Hades threatens them, she stands between them and (gently) tells him off. She won’t let anyone harm her babies, even if they’re shape-shifting demonic minions.

Gifts of Kindness: Snow White will gift them cookies and other baked goods. She also knitted them scarves because she worries about them catching a cold.

Song and Dance: She sings and dances with them all the time. The best way I can describe what kind of songs they sing is in this link (Pain is Steve, Snowie is Hayley, and Panic is Stan). And the best way I can describe what kind of dances they do together is in this link (never imagine them doing this dance without the sunglasses).

In this whimsical friendship, Snow White's nurturing spirit would keep Pain and Panic out of trouble, and they'd add a touch of chaos to her fairy-tale life.

The screenshot of this paragraph above is taken from @skyselfships (I Read Mirrorverse Pure of Heart) post.

For those who don't know, Mirrorverse Pure of Heart is a novel set in the universe of Disney Mirrorverse.

So what I love about the screenshot of the paragraph above is that even after Hades basically left Snow White to die, he did have enough of a heart to think about making it up to her if she did die. The thing that stuck out to most is that he'd make sure that she made it into the Elysian Fields.

The Elysian Fields were hard to reach, but for those few who were deemed worthy, they were promised an eternal life of relaxation, beauty, and amusement. The Elysian Fields, also called Elysium, went by many names. It was sometimes called the “White” Island, and more often it was referred to as the Islands of the Blessed. 

There were never storms on the Islands of the Blessed, and snow never fell. The only notable weather was a gentle, refreshing breeze that blew in from the west and an occasional light sprinkle of rain. Elysium is covered in golden flowers. The grass, trees, and water were dotted with fragrant blooms.

The Islands of the Blessed were an idyllic and pristine afterlife free of suffering, pain, and hardship. However, the heroes of legend were the only ones who were admitted because, for most people, the pastoral pleasures of Elysium were entirely out of reach. Only the most distinguished mortals, typically the sons and daughters of the gods, had ever gone there.

After learning all of this, it means that Hades doesn't let just "anyone" into the Elysian Fields. I think it shows so much about his character and the impressions she left on him in Mirrorverse: Pure of Heart. 

Recognition of Purity and Goodness: Snow White’s character is often associated with purity, kindness, and an unwavering belief in the goodness of others. These traits, while not traditionally seen as “heroic” in the sense of physical bravery or grand adventures, embody a different kind of heroism. By allowing her into the Elysian Fields, Hades might be acknowledging that true heroism can also be found in the purity of one’s heart and the impact of their kindness on the world.

Breaking Traditions: The Elysian Fields are typically reserved for heroes of legend—those who have performed great deeds and shown exceptional bravery. By admitting Snow White, Hades could be challenging these traditional criteria, suggesting that the definition of a hero is broader than previously thought. This act could symbolize a more inclusive and compassionate approach to who is deemed worthy of eternal peace and happiness.

Character Development for Hades: Hades is typically portrayed as a villain, but allowing Snow White into the Elysian Fields could show a more complex, albeit softer, side to his character. It might suggest that even he can recognize and reward true goodness, hinting at the potential for change or redemption. This adds depth to his character, making him more than just a one-dimensional antagonist.

Look at Cerberus! Isn't he the cutest thing?! Don't you just want to pet him?! X3

Anyway, we are still talking about the screenshot of the paragraph above, and Hades allowing Snow White to rub Cerberus’ belly is a hugely symbolic gesture that can be interpreted in several ways:

Trust and Acceptance: Cerberus, the fearsome three-headed guardian of the underworld, is typically portrayed as a fierce and loyal protector. Allowing Snow White to rub his belly suggests a level of trust and acceptance from both Hades and Cerberus. It indicates that Snow White’s inherent goodness and purity can even tame the most fearsome creatures.

Softening of Hades’ Character: This act could also signify a softer side of Hades. Hades showing leniency and warmth towards Snow White and Cerberus highlights his capacity for kindness and change. It adds depth to his character, suggesting that he can appreciate and reward gentleness and compassion.

Interplay of Light and Dark: Snow White, a symbol of innocence and light, interacting with Cerberus, a creature of the underworld, creates a beautiful contrast. This interplay of light and dark emphasizes the theme that goodness can exist even in the darkest places and that kindness can bridge the gap between vastly different worlds.

Closing argument:

Snow White and Hades rule the Underworld with compassion, ensuring that lost souls find solace. And they adopted Bambi, Flower, Thumper, and Thumper's sisters, Blossom, Violet, Daisy, Ria, and Tessie, as their children. (Blossom, Violet, Daisy, Ria, and Tessie are daddy's girls.)

🚫IF YOU DO NOT LIKE THIS SHIP, PLEASE DON'T COMMENT OR REBLOG 🚫

🚫 IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY HEADCANON PLEASE DON'T COMMENT OR REBLOG 🚫

[justporo]

Fouetté

Fouetté: “whipped”, quick whiplike movements in ballet (e.g. for turns)

A/N: So, this is something that came about on a Discord server. Suddenly a ballet AU was born in which Astarion is one and certainly the most tragic and beaten of dancers in Cazador's company. Thanks to @silmaryel especially and some others on the server who gave me this brainworm!

Warnings: implicit/past physical and emotional abuse, ptsd Wordcount: 3k

~~~

The rays of light shimmering through the giant windows were golden in the morning sun. Little particles of dust sparkled, drifting in and out of them. Soft piano music was drifting through the air, setting the background for the dancer twisting and arching in the middle of the studio.

He felt the warmth of the benevolent sun as he turned and turned in the middle of the polished wooden floors, a slight but confident smile on his lips. His movements seemed effortless and elegant, free and perfect. The moment itself seemed timeless, ethereal in its beauty.

But even all good things must come to an end.

The last pirouette was coming to a close. He assumed end position with a content sigh, chest heaving, illuminated by golden light.

Hard work, but the kind that pays off. Pain of exertion that in the end is crowned by reward.

With one knee on the ground and his torso bent back so far it seemed like he’d been decapitated, he remained in his position. Only the rising chest was now a sign of life.

Like a wind up puppet in a music box at the end of its little show, its head already torn off, waiting for someone to wind it back up again or close the box - because there was nothing else it could or wanted to do.

With the loud clack of the door to the studio falling closed, Astarion was violently whipped back to the real world. His head swivelled around to see Petras enter; late as always. His fellow dancer threw him an annoyed look as he caught the other staring. Astarion stared back, nose scrunched up in distaste at the lack of diligence.

Gone was the golden, serene scene in his mind already, replaced by grim reality once more.

He had been up for a good while already. A quick freezing shower after a handful of hours of sleep and it had been back to work: training in the mostly dark studio, only lit up by the emergency lights and his phone flash. Trying to get in as much training before someone else arrived.

Hours later, he was standing at the barre in the windowless room, crammed between the other dancers. The only light source were the harsh halogen tubes up above. Even the piano playing as the ensemble of dancers warmed up for a long day of training sounded shrill, every note a violent reminder of the rhythm they were supposed - no, forced - to follow.

Astarion looked at himself with his hand gripping the wooden bar, stretching to warm up for the ensemble work. He realised the bright relentless light from above cast the circles beneath his eyes even darker than they already were. It fit the drawn down corners of his mouth, the flat look in his crimson eyes and the hollow of his cheeks - all painted in shades of grey rather than gold after all.

He went into another stretch, fingers still tightly around the barre, bending at the waist so his gaze dropped from his gaunt face to his feet.

Better not to dwell on things, neither past nor future. Like dreams he allowed himself to have sometimes, foolishly. Or remembering when the last time was that he had smiled, when he had slept more than five hours or his body had been void of pain.

He stared at his feet as he felt the burn of his muscles groaning under the impossible strain he put them under, sinking deeper into his stretch. Eyes were trained on his feet, trying not to think at all.

But it wasn’t working. Looking at his feet made him self-aware of the constant pain they were in. And what mutilations were neatly hidden beneath the white satin.

Remaining low, he stared at his unmoving feet, not ripping the gaze of his unblinking eyes off them, up until they began burning uncomfortably. He didn’t even know if that or the ache in his toes was the reason behind almost tearing up.

At least this made the pain of other parts of his body disappear for a moment.

With a sigh he eventually closed his eyes, sinking deeper into his stretch still. He tried to ignore his surroundings as much as possible, just like he had done before, dreaming of a better, alternate universe. One in which dancing still brought him the joy he had once felt.

But Astarion’s somewhat tranquil state was quickly disturbed.

Beneath the shrill piano music he heard a familiar, rhythmic tapping. It became louder steadily, closing in.

Immediately, the atmosphere in the studio changed as if a switch had been flipped. Dancers quickly changed out of their street clothes, redid their hair into tight buns, took up a spot at the barre and began stretching eagerly, shoulders squared so much, it hurt to even look at. All conversations had stopped, replaced by a tense, anticipating silence.

Everyone knew what the increasing sounds meant. The polished ebony with the silver tip and the bone handle that made them. And whom it belonged to.

It was the same rhythm every morning, a cruel sort of routine.

Astarion had made the habit of counting along: Tap, one two, tap, one two, tap. At least it was reliable in the cruelty it brought.

Only, today it wasn’t the same rhythm: TAP, one tw-, TAP, one t-, TAP.

This already meant very bad news. Astarion felt the lump that immediately clogged his throat. Still in his stretch his brows drew together. An echo of pain ran down his spine and he felt how, along with his hands getting clammy, his heart began to gallop. His breath became ragged from the tapping growing louder, much more rushed and even more threatening than usual.

The door to the studio flung open with a force that made everyone flinch more than was normal.

In rushed the tall, imposing figure of Cazador Szarr, immaculate down to the last hair on his head. Szarr, known formerly as Vellioth’s star pupil, dancer extraordinaire, light of a new generation of ballet. And now after his tragic maiming injury, famed as acclaimed choreographer and teacher of his own ballet company.

A star, a genius, a legend beyond everyone else’s league.

His dancers and students though only knew him as the thing that plagued them, every night and every day. A constant shadow trying to grip their ankles. Even when he wasn’t there. 

But truly it was worse, when he was there. When those eyes bored into you and you heard the clacks of his omnipresent cane. And it was worse still when he was angry. Like today. Or like that night several weeks back, Astarion remembered all too well.

Cazador had taken exactly the right amount of steps so the door fell closed just behind him, the loud noise of it closing almost remnant of the lid of a sarcophagus sliding in place, dooming someone still alive to be forever entombed.

He was wearing a fine red coat today, fur trimmings at the hems, the same colour of his eyes that were already wandering around while his coattails still swung to a halt around his slender form. He had placed the cane before himself, long, spindly fingers wrapped around the bone handle.

The cane had belonged to his “master” as he liked to tell people. Albeit not with this kind of handle. Although, as he enjoyed adding, while watching the listener’s creeping horror, the bone had very well belonged to his own teacher as well. After a bit of stunned silence people then usually laughed uneasily, not deeming it true, while Cazador remained silent, caressing the handle of his stick.

Even with the injury that had permanently crippled and left him needing that cane, Szarr knew how to cut an imposing figure to most and a frightening one to few especially. His tall frame alone, the always perfectly slicked back black hair and the seemingly all seeing eyes, the barely hidden threat.

All his dancers knew this well.

But unfortunately, Astarion, his favourite dancer, his prodigy, knew it all best; from the blazing eyes posing a threat to what could manifest into unbearable pain. He still felt the phantoms of the last time he had to endure it.

Perfectly on time, another wave of aching ran through the pale dancer as he, along with everyone else, was staring intently at his master. Teacher surely was too light a word for the power he held over him and the others.

Cazador kept eyeing his dancers, fingers starting to tap on the bone end of his cane while around Astarion the others got restless, not knowing how to feel about this somewhat unfamiliar silence from their master.

Astarion knew though. It meant trouble.

When eventually someone at the back had the audacity to start whispering, Cazador broke his silence:

“It is only a few weeks until the debut of the production,” Szarr began flatly.

More silence, more tapping of his index on the bone.

“Is there a reason behind why I don’t see you train already?”

A well portioned dose or rage had entered his voice while his brows drew together, eyes glaring. But everyone still seemed under a spell, not daring to move.

“Do I need to lash at your feet before you will start dancing?” Szarr shouted then, making his dancers flinch.

His words stung sharply like a whip - or the end of a cane.

Quickly, everyone scurried around to get into position for training now. Everyone knew exactly with which part to start with, where to stand. Cazador had made sure of it.

While Szarr’s eyes narrowed, impatient about the last people getting in place, Astarion fought with his ragged breath as he assumed position among the others.

It had been weeks since Szarr had entered the training studio with so much barely contained rage. The last time it had meant a visit to the ER for Astarion and flashes of pain down his spine ever since, no matter if he was standing, dancing or sleeping.

Then finally the master waved to the pianist to start with a single twist of his index.

It began.

Astarion immediately forced his mind out of its increasing state of panic as best he could as he followed through his steps. At least he could feel the echo of what this once would have felt like. The stretching, turning and arching, at least it still quieted down his mind as he concentrated only on the music and his body in accord with it. Even if it didn’t gift the same warmth anymore. There was only cold, honed, lethal precision left.

Too late he realised that the music had stopped along with everyone else. Coming out of a turn, Astarion noticed Cazador’s ruby eyes burning into him while he stopped with a jolt. His squared shoulders folded in immediately, slouching, wishing he could disappear instead of having to face his master.

The atmosphere was tense and ready to snap, the dancers awaiting the verdict for their performance.

Szarr’s form of feedback was quite easy to decipher: three taps with the cane “good”, two “acceptable”, one “unsatisfied”, none - there would be consequences. 

The silence was deafening today.

Szarr’s eyes wandered over his dancers, while Astarion felt the drumming of his heart up in his throat. The pain in his back was almost unbearable now. But best not to draw more attention to himself.

“Astarion.”

His pulse increased by what felt like a tenfold.

Cazador’s voice was terribly silent, one could have almost mistaken it for something less than deadly.

“Astarion, will you come here?”

It wasn’t a question.

As if controlling himself from somewhere outside his own body, Astarion stepped forward while he heard silent gasps around him. With every step feeling like he needed to rip them off the floor, the pale dancer stepped in front of his master. He saw the small, cruel smile play on his lips while he awaited his pupil. The way his fingers drummed on his stick now seemed almost cheerful.

“Don’t slouch before me, boy, turn around,” Szarr purred when Astarion had come to stand before him. The tone nearly sounded like he was whispering a sweet nothing to him and not a threat. He obeyed immediately, no matter what, feeling more uneasy with Cazador’s threatening presence behind him, but out of sight.

“Remove your shirt, boy.”

The dancer flinched, throat closing up completely as he sensed the intention behind his master’s words. But his arms moved of their own accord while his mind screamed at him to run. But his body was too attuned to obeying blindly by now.

As he pulled up his thin shirt over his head, his mind raced.

Truly, he wouldn’t harm him in front of the others, would he? Usually this part was reserved for behind closed doors. For when he was called to Szarr’s office alone, and the others sent home for the day. Everybody knew what happened behind closed doors. It was just that no one ever dared to address it.

The sigh leaving Szarr’s lips truly shouldn’t have been this content when his eyes fell upon his previous work. Neither should the smile have been as proud as he eyed the scars, the still healing bruises.

“Now, turn again for me. You do that so well, don’t you?”

Barely able to swallow with how parched his throat felt, Astarion turned around again, breathing shallow. But yet again his body was way quicker than his mind. Just obeying, turning, moving, arching, aching - that was what he was best at. It was true.

Cazador welcomed him with a toothy grin. Then he stepped closer. So close, in fact, that Astarion could smell him. The same unpleasant, musty smell that hadn't left his nose ever since that night several weeks ago. The last time Cazador had come this uncomfortably close.

He kept staring straight ahead, trying not to notice how the way his master looked at him had become almost lovingly as he reached out with long, boney fingers, as if trying to reach for his chin. Only shortly before making contact, he stopped. Instead he threw up his cane, catching it again, gripping further down, making Astarion wince.

He kept staring straight ahead, right over Cazador’s shoulder as his master and tormentor leaned to him, even closer than before, musty smell becoming almost unbearable.

But what made his heart almost stop, was when he felt the bone handle wander down his back - and the scars there. Almost caressing past traces of injuries that would leave him marked forever. And fresher ones that still must be a sight to behold. The sickeningly gentle touch made his muscles spasm and burn more than the actual pain from being touched there.

“See how well the little lamb dances?” Cazador spoke silently as Astarion was thrown back to when the cane had last made contact with his skin, albeit with the other end and wholly different fashion. It took every last bit of his power to not collapse. His eyes were torn wide, yet again unblinking and burning.

He was barely aware of his present surroundings by now. Only his master’s voice still connected him to the present, oddly enough, as his mind was doomed to relive a night from before.

“See how well he does after I have given him a much needed reminder of how he ought to be grateful and work hard to achieve his dreams?” Cazador murmured.

Another stroke of bone on skin. Astarion’s back twisted unwillingly.

Cazador cocked his head to the side, noticing his reaction. So he used his cane pressed against Astarion’s back to make him step even closer, leaning down to him. Until they almost seemed ready to embrace each other.

Astarion forced himself to endure it, fearing the consequences if he shouldn’t. He knew this was a test.

And Szarr took his time testing him before he took a step back with a click of his tongue. The master glanced at the rest of his timid sheep.

“You better give me no reason to give you the same reminder,” his master finished, cane withdrawing, taking another step back.

Finally. With more shallow breaths, shoulders slacking and eyes watering so much so he couldn’t see clearly, Astarion couldn’t believe his luck of having gotten off the hook. Until-

“Why are you almost wailing?” Szarr snapped. The edge to his master’s voice betrayed how cheerful seemed to have found something to latch onto after all. Once more he stepped close, noticing his pupil’s state. Cold, sinewy fingers gripped his chin forcefully, bruising his pale skin immediately by how violently he tugged on his jaw.

He didn’t dare breathe as his master leaned close, passing every line from before. Way too close to be anything but desperate love or blazing hatred. Fingers were clawing into his skin.

“Didn’t I just praise you, boy? This is how you thank me?” His voice was almost a growl now while Astarion felt his heart hammer in his throat. The fingers dragged him closer to Cazador’s face until their faces almost touched.

“Look at me,” he demanded. So he did.

Cazador’s eyes were burning. Astarion didn’t flinch.

Through the haze of tears he saw a wild mix of emotions in his master’s eyes: loathing, hate, rage - and deep down, even a kind of twisted admiration? Adoration? He didn’t want to think about it. But he didn’t break eye contact either.

“Ungrateful,” Cazador exclaimed and shoved him away, tone almost unbelieving to Astarion’s own surprise.

“Again, from the top,” he barked at the pianist while Astarion with stiff limbs assumed position again.

Pain kept searing through his back, his scars now on full display for everyone. Astarion didn’t even bother putting his shirt back on. Instead he held his back straight, chin stretched high.

He kept dancing. His own rage was dulled by lingering panic. But it was there. And it kept him going.

Rage and a bit of undying, defiant pride. He felt it as he turned, eyes landing on Cazador with every time he came around again. But his master didn’t dare meet his eyes for the rest of the day.

[dokudoki]

Hello there, I’m in the fandom for 9 years now and almost saw like around 1500 AUs. I had a bookmark collection and I found 300 tumblr accounts that has either got terminated or gotten hacked by a crypto scam/product.

In one of the links, thanks to the help of wayback machine, I recovered at least the user pic of the page and it now doesn’t leave my mind if I can’t find the source.

Did you made an AU named Coffe-time AU with a white haired Frisk and a flat cap wearing Chara?

It might be not a full pledged AU, maybe only contains 2-3 pictures max and filled with reposts. If I remember correctly it also have a brick looking banner.

If you are congrats to me, I found the remnants thru wayback and I want to ask was there any correlations with our universe traveling buddy?

If not then it’s gonna be another abandoned AU media for me ( • ᴖ • )

Also thanks for your contributions for the fandom, I’ve been seeing your art since either when the first Chara Haven made or when CoreFrisk started DADS (Dumb Ask Disposal Service).

I hope your life is filled with joy just like how your art filled our lives with happiness.

=)

Hello, the answer is lowkey complicated and it's been nearly ten years, and I think everyone involved has long since moved on. I might also get some details wrong because again, ten years. And again, it's a complicated situation. Pretty much every blog I link to here has been long abandoned.

The AU you're talking about is @cafetaleau and it was created by a person who at the time went by Teamun/Tea Mun (they use a different username nowadays but I don't know it, and even if I knew I wouldn't tell you without permission!) You can see my name in that blog's description but I wasn't actually directly involved with it, although I knew the person who made it. Hence why you can sometimes find art of the white haired Frisk with CORE!Frisk - we were internet friends who roleplayed a lot together on Skype and later Discord. That's probably where CafeTale AU was born, too, but I don't really remember.

The reason why there is so much artwork of Tea!Frisk is that Teamun used to ask for a lot of art requests and buy commissions to have A LOT of various artists draw their OC, including me. The image you sent me separately can be found on the blog I linked, but it was drawn by @spooksmoose and here's the direct link to it: https://www.tumblr.com/spooksmoose/151505889788/

As far as I know, Tea!Frisk was Teamun's OC design and the other two characters - Chara and Asriel - were later designed by @rustnut. Although I asked them about it just now and they don't remember anymore! But I'm 99% sure they were the one who designed those two. They also told me that Tea commissioned them to draw all the icons for the ask blog. Teamun was never an artist, and every artwork of Tea!Frisk and/or CafeTale you can find is either a paid commission or a free art request.

The reason why the situation is complicated is that as it turns out, Teamun pretty much completely copied the character design of Tea!Frisk from a small askblog called @blankfrisk to use it on their own OC, with a few small details changed. Then they went around and paid a lot of money to a lot of artists to draw their OC Tea, which is why you can find a lot of old artwork of them pretty much everywhere. I don't think it was done maliciously, but morally speaking it's kind of yikes to copy someone else's design nearly 1:1 and it possibly drove the original creator out of the fandom.

That's everything I know about Tea!Frisk and CafeTale that I think is okay to share with random internet strangers for early Undertale AU fandom history purposes. Also no, I wasn't involved in designing any characters with the AU but I probably helped Teamun with some worldbuilding or ideas, which might be why I'm credited? I straight up just don't remember anymore.

Cheers 👍

[strxberryblxnde]

Greetings!

If you've stumbled across this post, hello! We're the co-owners of this blog and creators of Strawberry Blonde, a We Happy Few fan-made continuation taking place after the epilogue portion of the game. We have been working on this since 2022 but due to our lives offline as well as other commitments, work on the project stilled and we were unable to finish these until now. Today, we're bringing you the concepts and finished character sheet for Amy!

What started off as a simple idea when talking on Discord one day turned into something that we both hold dearly in our hearts. However, this isn't where the fun ends, as we decided to write an accompanying story! Which you can find here should you want to learn a little more about this bright-eyed girl. With someone like her in your life, who needs to pop a Joy?

All artwork and concepts were drawn by @pixlraccoon , with co-designing and visual input by DevilishlyVintage. Post written and edited by DevilishlyVintage. We Happy Few and its associated entities belong to Compulsion Games. Strawberry Blonde and all original characters belong to DevilishlyVintage and Pix3lRaco0n .

© 2022-2025

Introduction:

Amelia Charlotte Roberts (known locally as Amy) may seem like the usual 'girl next door', though like with many of the paintings she has made over the years, there's more to her than meets the eye. Wise beyond her years and initially hailing from the wealthy city of Cambridge, Amy has settled for a more modest life in Harbourside, Bristol, preferring to spend her time painting away in her arts and crafts room or tending to her garden when the weather permits it. If you know anything about British weather, you will know its unpredictable.

Estranged from her family, Amy lives her life to the fullest, surrounded by a few close friends. Though content with her day-to-day routine, she can never help but wonder what it would be like to have someone by her side to share in her adventures.

Personality:

By nature, Amy has always been a crafty person. From childhood, she's made many types of creations. She's dabbled in a little bit of everything from art to patterns for clothes. When you're a Roberts, the world is kind of your oyster...At least, you'd think it would be.

Never mistake privilege for happiness. Neither of them go hand in hand a lot of the time.

Inspiration:

We have many sources of inspiration for Amy regarding her design and character, some more noticeable than others. Though one of our biggest inspirations was models from the '60s, some of these including Brigitte Bardot, Twiggy, Jean Shrimpton and many more such as Joanna Lumley.

We also took inspiration from Anya Taylor-Joy's portrayal of Beth Harmon in the Netflix mini-series The Queen's Gambit.

Once a Cambridge girl, always a Cambridge girl! As well as being a visual inspiration, Joanna Lumley is who we based Amy's speaking voice on. (see here) When creating her, we wanted to consider all aspects of her character. Not just with physical representation, but how she would sound if she were a character in the game.

Appearance:

(Visuals concepts exploring Amy's initial design along with choices that were later scrapped/changed, with concepts of what she would look like if she appeared within We Happy Few itself).

Since Amy is based on the Mainland as opposed to Wellington Wells, naturally she is going to have more freedom in how she dresses as opposed to those oppressed on an island cut off from the rest of the United Kingdom. It's important to factor in that she is going to be a lot healthier in terms of her physical appearance, having access to proper healthcare and a balanced diet.

We wanted to embody Amy as a 'diamond in the rough' with features complimenting this. Her green eyes and strawberry blonde hair were a deliberate decision as they are not only rare features statistically, but they also act serve as a visual representation of her positive personality, contrasting the darker colour palette of Arthur Hastings (see here for example)

Amy's styles are a blend of the bright and colourful hippie movement of the '60s with some elements of the '70s as the years go on. The differences in colour, as well as overall style, are representative of her not wanting to fit into a single box.

She's a free-spirited person, a woman confident in who she is and someone who embraces her sexuality, acknowledging her beauty not in a way that makes her narcissistic, but affirming her own self-worth. You won't find anything she wears in a clothing store and she likes it that way!

Relationship with Arthur Hastings:

If you haven't read Strawberry Blonde, please click off this post and use the link in the introduction, otherwise what comes up next won't make any sense.

(Fan art by @zafiroxdsgsg)

For as long as romantic love has existed, so has platonic love (though it is often overshadowed by its passionate counterpart). Derived from the Greek philosopher Plato (fun fact: he never actually used the word) platonic relationships are deep, intimate relationships without the need or desire for anything sexual. These can happen between members of the same or opposite gender.

A soulmate doesn't necessarily mean romance and don't let this mislead you, this is a love story. Just not the kind you may be thinking of.

When comparing Arthur and Amy individually you may wonder how such people could come together to form a relationship. They're polar opposites, one being bright and bubbly and the other being stubborn and level-headed. Combined, however, it's easy to see how well the pair works.

They bring out the best in each other, the epitome of what people today have coined as 'black cat and golden retriever' types of relationships, where one is more introverted and mysterious while the other is more outgoing and friendly.

They're an important part of each other's healing journeys, perhaps more than they realise in the beginning.

A Final Word:

To find out the rest of Amy's story, you'll have to read Strawberry Blonde. We don't have time to go into everything here in this post, but we hope we have been able to offer you all some further insight into Amy's character and the process behind her conception! If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us through our messages- we're more than happy to answer anything you have to ask in the best way we can without giving too much away!

Until next time and signing off with love,

DevilishlyVintage & Pixlraccoon

[ad-hawkeye]

LBC Theory: Modern!Alkaid and MC's Past

Alright, so this is going to primarily act as a place for me to gather my thoughts. There will be CN spoilers below, but I will put proper spoiler warnings before any of them.

So, what is this theory? Simple. Alkaid and MC knew each other as children, but don't remember.

On its own, it sounds utterly ridiculous. Why would they not remember? What evidence is there for this? And a few months ago, I would have agreed. But with each new SSR being released, I'm slowly becoming more and more convinced.

Let's start off with global canonical evidence. For the sake of simplicity, I will be referring to MC's mother as Prefect Crimson, and Alkaid's mother as Tammy.

(Note: I would like to give my thanks to the other members of the LBC Discord for first broaching the concept. I just wanted to compile everything!)

It is canon that Prefect Crimson can manipulate people's memories. She once saved Clarence and wiped his memory of the encounter. She also wiped MC's memories of her father, amongst other occurrences, following his death.

Tammy is a woman with a lot of secrets. It is canon that Tammy is entirely aware of who Prefect Crimson is, and of the unnatural influence she has on people. Tammy has thoroughly investigated her. She knows MC is her daughter. She knows Prefect Crimson was originally the source of the mental illness spikes via her radio show. She also knows Prefect Crimson apparently changed her ways and used her powers to soothe mental illnesses instead.

Tammy knows who MC is before the plot even begins and has documents on her. She also knows that MC is "special". Despite this, and despite her job, Tammy is friendly to her and is deeply invested in her safety. Unusually kind for a spy who knows this girl has otherworldly abilities and is now dating her son... her son she desperately wants to have a normal life.

Alkaid immediately feels drawn to MC despite having only known her briefly. Almost as if there's this feeling that he's always known her, but can't put a finger on why...

There are several AUs (even just in global!) regarding the plot line of Alkaid and MC having known each other in the past, but both of them/one of them (usually MC) not recognizing each other upon reuniting. This is most notably seen in Alkaid's Destiny's Call SSR (childhood friends... MC doesn't recognize Alkaid, while Alkaid merely suspects MC of being the girl he once knew), and in his Spirit World route (Alkaid erases all evidence of MC in the third era, his memories included. He regains these memories in era four. MC doesn't recognize him, as she is not the MC he knew. Yet).

There is a whisper (Alkaid's Top Up SSR) that addresses the idea of forgetting and getting to know someone again. Alkaid says if doesn't matter if MC forgets him; he'd cherish getting to know her again.

The "final boy route" tends to be the most important in terms of running themes and ideas. Alkaid's "final boy route" is in Eden. Alkaid's cries as a child reach MC in the modern world, and she vows to help him. MC then meets Alkaid as an adult. MC doesn't know this is the boy she vowed to help, while Alkaid didn't realize this girl answered his cry for help until after the signal went out days prior to the plot starting.

Every Alkaid has a fascination with recording memories. He wants to record everything worth remembering, and vows to record MC's life as she records his.

Now, let's get into CN evidence.

Spoiler warning! Major plot spoilers can be found below for Modern Alkaid, and some vague spoilers can be found for other events. Proceed with caution!

Tammy knows a lot more than she lets on. In the past, Alkaid got involved in a severe accident involving extraterrestrial technology. His memory of the incident was wiped, as well as any extraterrestrial knowledge he might have known. So, like MC, he has also canonically had his memory wiped.

There are several other AUs that involve the same exact plot line I mentioned in the global section... specifically, the plot line of Alkaid and MC having known each other in the past, but both of them/one of them (usually MC) not recognizing each other upon reuniting. This is seen in the second Qixi AU, the Bejeweled Heart AU, and even in the latest 'Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio' AU.

Alkaid and MC have a running bit where they pretend to be strangers meeting for the first time.

And now, let's discuss theories.

I believe Tammy and Prefect Crimson knew each other. That they came to an odd understanding based on their mutual desire to protect their children. I believe that Alkaid and MC met. I believe that MC forgot him once her memories were wiped due to his association with his mother, a spy investigating extraterrestrial activity. I believe Alkaid forgot MC once his memories were wiped due to her association with her mother, an extraterrestrial being.

I think it's highly unlikely Alkaid secretly remembers her. In all AUs where he is the one who remembers, he does subtle tests to see if MC remembers him. Examples being the flower in Destiny's Call, the fox joke and tea in Spirit World, or the pom pom in the 'Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio' AU ...Or the not-so-subtle act of trying to show her his ID in the modern world. There is no notable example or foreshadowing of Alkaid trying to get MC to remember anything prior to the mountain meeting, and the logistics of him remembering would make for a very convoluted theory. It's possible! And my theory would still work! But IMO, it's unlikely.

I do, however, think it's likely that he would be the first to remember in a future storyline. Not MC.

Also, what if this is subconsciously why Alkaid is so fixated on recording everything? So he never forgets something... or someone important again?

I believe the reason why Tammy is so friendly to MC right off the bat is because she remembers her from years ago. She knows Prefect Crimson changed her ways, and that MC is an innocent bystander in all of this.

As for letting Alkaid meet her again, Tammy is riddled with a lot of guilt. She tries to overcompensate by giving Alkaid the freedom to do what he wants, like going to a school that is a point of extraterrestrial interest, and that clearly wants him there for some reason. Also, who's to say she doesn't think meeting MC again would be good for Alkaid? He's had a stunted upbringing and it's rare for him to voice his own wants - except when it comes to MC. She makes him more human. More normal.

And isn't that what Tammy wants?

For her son to finally feel like himself again? After all the pain she caused for him?

[antimony-medusa]

Hi! To preface: I don't think there's any one right or wrong answer to my question necessarily, but I value your opinion as a level-headed adult in this fandom who can probably provide sensible input on the issue I'm having, so I thought I'd ask.

If a CC asks for their character not to be drawn (specifically referring to fanart, which they likely saw on Twitter) in a sexualised way, what does that mean for written fanwork content? Is it "wrong" (putting this in quotation marks since that's a loaded word, to say the least) to write nsfw content about said character and post it on Ao3, considering the differences in visibility/CC knowledge of those platforms, as well as the general consensus/expectation that CCs don't generally read fanfic anyway? Where is the line between "you should respect the CC's wishes" (avoiding the word "boundaries" since that's also very loaded in mcyt spaces) and "you can do whatever you want forever; fanworks are created by and for fans, not for the creators" drawn? Does "just don't put it where they can see unless they go looking" (i.e. correctly tagged on Ao3, not on a CC-frequented site like Twitter) apply? Would it be better not to do it at all, or only create and share said content in private spaces like Discord? Or is this all a "there is no single 'morally correct' answer, make your own personal judgement" thing?

(Sorry for the long-winded question but this is genuinely something I'm struggling with right now, lol. As I said I value and respect your opinion and views about these kinds of things in fandom, so if you have anything to say on the matter I'd appreciate your input!)

Alright so, obligatory warning for discourse on this one right at the top, and possibly also long post. These tend to be me rambling.

This is a situation that I think it's fair that a lot of people disagree. Your personal comfort level with making NSFW content in general is not where my comfort level is, we can come to totally different equilibriums. And then you add in creators expressing that they don't like seeing NSFW content of their characters, and people end up in a whole lot of different places, whether that's a complete no on shipping or NSFW, or people feeling fine to consume it but not create it, or only if it's archive locked, or only specific ships or smps, or whatever. I think it's fine that we don't all agree on this, creation is a fickle beast and we are in a weird place as a fandom of being not rpf but kinda cousins, and we can get *really* close to the creators with twitch and twitter, so people's comfort level in meshing all the parasociality and roleplay and real life of it all can end up in a lot of different places.

I just think that the most important thing for the fandom being a healthy place to spend time on the internet is that we don't go aroud sending hate/abuse to those we disagree with. a) i don't agree with internet mobs or suicide baiting or anon hate in general, b) the number of times I have seen internet games of telephone happen when it comes to this subject is unreal. To use an example from literally today, I saw someone saying that Pac of qsmp pacmike was uncomfortable with shipping art and fic and we all should stop shipping immediately, and once I tracked it back to its source, it turns out that what had happened was the creator said that he wasn't a fan that all the art was of him in the jumpsuit that used to be his skin, he has a new skin now, which turned into sexy jumpsuit art was the problem, which turned into pac hates all sexy fan art, which turned into "pac is being bombarded with nsfw art and shipping and he hates it". Now he might actually also not like NSFW art, but that's not actually what he was adressing, but it was certainly what was being circulated! So like, people warning me off of certain subjects— how do I know that they're actually accurate or if twitter just went twitter on a passing mention of something someone said on a twitch stream?

So I think it's way way way healthier for us as a fandom to sometimes disagree on the subject of "what we're drawing/writing about" and when that happens we implement Don't Like; Don't Read, and we just ignore that, or block if necessary. Don't Want To See it? Simply Don't See It. It's a bad idea to start hate campaigns for sinners, and half the time it's based on bad information anyways.

But in cases that you do know that the creator doesn't want to see that, you found an accurate clip? So this is a case where I think that there's no single moral answer to this that everyone is gonna agree on. We're all coming at it from too many different cultural backgrounds and different streamers in mind and comfort levels with NSFW in general. I don't think there is a firm answer that is gonna make you morally safe. But my personal feelings is that in cases where we know the creators doesn't want to see that, I think the important part there is that the creator never sees that, not that we stamp it off the internet entirely.

I do think, personally, ymmv, that you are not necessarily doing anything morally wrong with drawing or writing NSFW of someone's character, even if they think it's weird. There's a long history of creators saying "you can't do [this] with my characters," and it happens to be you can't [make them gay] enough to make me uncomfortable in general principle with saying creator of the character gets to call the shots in all settings forever. This happened with Anne Rice and with the supernatural fandom and like— it's the internet, we get to make the characters be gay together. This is the making sex jokes about fictional characters website, and Ao3 is the making porn about fictional characters website. I think it's fine if it exists on the internet, the question comes down to one of what we're forcing the creator to see, or what we're putting where they'll stumble upon it. Like, examples from real life— if you have a friend who's vegan, it's polite to not spend time rhapsodizing about how good meat is around them, and if you know that meat makes them sick, it's polite to do a meatless meal around them. That's a human person you want to be okay around you. But that's their boundary for their life, not yours, so even when you're being polite you have no obligation to go vegan when they're not around. And they have a politeness obligation to not walk into a steakhouse and freak out because there's meat there. They have a boundary for their life, and I'm going to respect it, but my life is a different story, and they need to take reasonable steps to protect their boundaries and not just expect everyone else to conform to them.

Or walking by someone on the street and waiting till they're out of earshot and then going "jesus christ that guy was hot" to your friends— that's fine. That's normal human behaviour. What becomes rude is when you make it hot guy's problem and yell at him. Being attracted to someone in your own space is not a problem. I'm aroace, I am not going to be in a relationship with anyone. I'm not going to ban having crushes on me, as long as you don't make it my business. Talking about an attractive person in your own space is not a problem. Being sexual in your own space— and again we are talking about fictional characters, the way I see it, these are lies we're telling about folks that are not real, who live in little minecraft worlds— that's fine. The problem is if we start catcalling people about it.

When you walk into fandom spaces you are walking into a space where we all like taking fictional guys and telling stories about them and a good portion of those stories are going to include kissing. That is not necessarily baseline normal for like, all of humanity, but people talk about tv shows they watch as one of the classic work small talk techniques. Fandom takes the "I hope ted gets together with jessica" "no he needs to work on himself first" discussion and writes stories, is all, to share with each other. Privately. On our special private website where there's a button you can click to hide your work from search engines and another one to hide it from logged-out users. If you log into the website and search things up, no tags blocked, what you find is on you for saying "I will see literally anything that exists on this subject in a space meant for literally anything". You will find gore. You will find kissing. You literally just opted in to seeing it. That's on you.

So like, there's my little defense of nsfw work existing in general, I think it existing is not a problem. I do think that we should keep it FAR AWAY from streamers. They get to set the rules for their spaces, and if someone doesn't want to see sexualized fan art, I do think we should make sure that in a reasonable way, they never have to see sexualized fan art/fic.

So like me personally, I'm going to hit that Ao3 button to hide my work from search engines, and anything NSFW (or shippy, depending on the person) is not going to go into the main tags on tumblr or twitter or anywhere I'm aware that the creators ever check that tag, and I'd probably archive lock it if the creator had publically mentioned being uncomfortable with it, and if I was regularly posting NSFW I'd block the creators on social media with any account I discuss NSFW with. I want to make sure that I am talking to my friends about the cubitos, not catcalling someone.

And I would probably err on the side of caution when it comes to social media sites that creators are on? Okay so the fandom has a habit of saying that NSFW and Shipping is BAD and can't exist, on the one hand, but on the other hand it says that anything that isn't Bad Wrong Shipping/Explicit NSFW is fine, which leads to like— extremely sexy thirst trap art being drawn and then the creators are tagged. People putting family dynamic fics that really pushes that envelope in the main tag. Gahhhhhh????? No? Don't do that?

I think it would be healthier in the fandom if we did a lot more going "this is for the fandom, not the creator" and we don't tag creators on twitter, and we took our little kissing fics, or gore, or kidfic, or neurodiverse headcanons, or anything else it might be not for the creator to see, and we kept it in fandom spaces and away from creators. But Ao3 is that fandom space that you have to opt into, it's literally archive of our Own, for fans, in that space as long as you tag it you're good.

So the TL;DR of this all is that my opinion is that if you tag it correctly on Ao3 you're fine. Maybe archive lock it. Keep it off twitter. Don't make it the streamer's problem, and you're good.

[pure-ablution]

Sorry, I wasn't clear in my question. When I asked about self-improvement, I don’t mean the fluffy, abstract kind of course. I’m more drawn to things with real substance like elocution classes, posing courses, or any suggestions like those.

Ah, I understand now! I still think that these courses can be something of a waste of money, though. It’s very easy to want to change your life and become the platonic ideal of the elegant woman overnight, but in my opinion (and experience), the whole ‘princess charm school’ makeover montage thing isn’t really a thing. You’ll end up paying an awful lot of money for a weekend course that really isn’t going to change your life, because the skills taught are much more long-term time investments than five hours plus lunch at the NLC can provide. These sorts of things are really just luxury experiences packaged up as self-improvement, I think, and they’re definitely not going to give you any real key into an elevated social circle or Instagram-worthy life.

Elocution classes can be good, if you genuinely struggle a great deal with articulating yourself, and there are some excellent teachers out there, but unless you suffer speech impediments to the point that others cannot understand you, then you don’t need to invest in professional help. I completely understand the benefits that can come from softening or even entirely erasing your native accent, in some cases, as sad a truth as that is, but you don’t need to bankrupt yourself for the cause. There is more than enough available for free online that can teach you to speak clearly, eloquently, and still maintain some character in your voice. I had a truly diabolical accent when I first started learning English, and even when I first moved to the UK, I found that my accent didn’t always give the best impression or work with the way that I wanted to present myself, so I worked on it myself. I recorded myself speaking and identified major issues, I found recordings of people whose voices inspired me in some small way, I sourced a few guides and resources online and in the libraries, and I curated my accent over time, until I was confident in how I sounded in English and knew that there wasn’t some major discord anymore between the sweet face and the bratva accent.

Posing courses are perhaps something slightly more practical, not least because it’s helpful to have someone physically teaching you in-person, and I would recommend them if you’re someone who is photographed often and yet tragically unphotogentic. I deeply sympathise, as someone who really, really doesn’t photograph well. I think of posing classes and their general ilk as something similar to makeup classes: they’re not actually necessary, and you could learn by yourself, but it’s fun and helpful to be taught for a few hours by someone who knows their stuff. Still, even after the class has ended, you’ll need to continually practise in your own time, with a tripod and self-esteem of steel. There are some excellent books, guides, and some videos out there, too, but nothing really works quite like hours spent contorting yourself in front of a camera and crying over the results in the privacy of your own room, and finally, finally stumbling upon a formula that can be burnt into your muscle memory and whipped out as needed. In summary: classes are helpful pointers in the right direction, but not an instant and permanent life-changer.

Remember that I am biased, though, as a natural DIY girl who is extremely reluctant to part with her money. All these sorts of courses do exist, and people do pay for them, so if you have the money to spend and want a fun, luxurious experience to chivvy you along in your journey, then they may well be exactly what you need. It really depends on whether you have the time, patience, research skills, and stubbornness to work it out by yourself, or whether you’d prefer to pay for someone to tell you what’s what and be done with it—and there’s no right answer here, or any shame in either. It’s just a question, yet again, of individual circumstances, and what would best slot into your overall plan and goals.

[x-manson-annotated]

X-Manson Annotated Chapter 5 - Part Three: THE RAID.

This section has more worldbuilding and we get to be formally introduced to everyone's favorite guy:

*Thor and Wonder Man. Shame the poor bastard gets to see the fucked up cult his AU boyfriend is in. @brw sorry, champion. Thor, literal god exists in the cult au too.

**Looking at this, i'm going to take a stab at what he means by this:

Captain America, he's mentioned later.

Iron Man, also mentioned.

Vance Astro, directly recalls being there.

Firestar, also mentions being there.

Thor.

Wonder Man.

All and all, decent lineup. There's probably more, but i'm basing this purely on who's mentioned later. It's possible Black Widow or Spider-Woman are also there. I choose to think that Sersi and Crystal are also there because then they get to see horrors.

*Xavier's cult loves Independence Day?

**Damn, i wish i had updated things faster, it would have been slick to drop this on July 5th.

*Branding moment.

**That makes sense. The other psychics plus Cable probably made the math difficult on how many were present. Dani's absence makes me think that maybe she didn't count as one of the Psi's that kidnapped Betsy Braddock.

*That's so goddamn weird, what's the utility of that? Is it heating? It can't be.

*They found a bunch of fucking body parts in the school itself.

*I think that the Throne is the equivalent to Cerebro. Weird, culty, low budget cerebro.

**The Two kids are this Au's version of Nate Grey and Rachel Summers. Aint life grand?

**This only happened in 2021, but reading it now, I'm reminded of Amy Carlson or "Mother God" of the Love Has Won cult. She was also mummified and kept by her worshippers.

Hulk walk by @librabear . Link to the original post:

https://www.tumblr.com/librabear/121096092553/old-hulk-walk-cycle-i-did-about-3-years-ago-tried?source=share

**Hulk taking the "If it fits it works" approach to the situation.

*I'm not fully sure that tracks, but okay.

*Twelve Unknown Children.

*Eight Adults.

Jean Grey

Betsy Braddock

Unknown Arab Woman? (someone on the cerebro discord suggested this could be Monet St Croix. I don't buy it.)

Unknown Man 1.

Unkown Man 2.

Unkown Woman 1

Unkown Woman 2

Unkown Woman 3

Why is it the the only unknown woman singled out is the arab woman? The other three women are just hit with the blank "unknown woman" but not her? Who is she meant to be?

*God DAMN

*So horrifying it moves a literal god to tears.

**Vance is such a fucking cop, Scott was helpless and blinded and he hit him.

*Cop

*Then it's not solid Gold, Angie. You idiot.

**Vance Astrovik just hates autistic people, i think.

That's weird, I feel like the money probably came from Warren's companies. New Salem Investments and from people drawn to the cult by anti-mutant hysteria. Real cult shit.

[notmuchtoconceal]

The other day I was on cam over Telegram with @nation-of-bros (I only use Telegram to video chat. I think dedicated messager apps are stupid. I like to see people. I don't like to be on my phone all day. You need to grab my attention early or display persistence. I don't hang with quitters) and you know what's fuckin funny, bro?

That dude who's bullshit I was just reblogging used to fuck with my bro all the time, too. Same shit. They're both self-professed lazy Conservative nerds with major daddy kinks who want my dick. He was even more ripe for fuckin projection than I was.

As I was staring into my bro's cornflower blue eyes and his broad, fleshy cheeks and admiring the length and thickness of his mane, it was like...

Bro, I didn't know if it was coming from me or him, but I could feel that guy's howling radiating out of the ether. I could feel a tension stiffening in my body, comprimsed of pure vindictive jealous rage for me and my bro. I could feel it attempting to goad me into bashing in his skull with crude words and obvious sentiments. It had grown so listless and so mild, I could finally feel it and assess it totally as myself, without being drawn in.

It made me fully feel and understand (I having let it happen to me again, now as an adult) how prolonged exposure to such selfish, impotently wrathful people can absolutely induce states of correspondingly prolonged dissociation, even veering unto psychosis, because that's just who they are inside. Their thoughts and feelings are incompatible because their automatic visceral and psychological responses are rooted in beating, shame and neglect. As a consequence, they're constantly ping-pong balling between two extremes, unable to ever cohere into a coherent personality. Thus, their sole source of personal power and self-worth comes from spreading their own patterns of discord by embracing all-out chaos, and this is ultimately the logic of cancer.

The longer they refuse to take responsibility for what was done to them, who they are, and who they can choose to be instead, they'll continue to be nothing but a plague on themselves and everyone around them.

As if harsh sentiments you needed to hear somehow cancelled out genuine forgiveness.

Think at the time, I just looked and my bro, and went "Huh... This must constitute mutual karmic residue."

Better scrub that shit.

Totally love hanging out with my bro.

My life is fucking awesome now.

[facethemuses]

Hi! So I saw one of your posts (i'll link it at the end) about Doctor Who and The Pantheon of Discord and wanted to share my thoughts

In the post you mention that you were thinking about "The Doctor is one of The Pantheon" theory and I love that theory, so much so that I included The Doctor in a post I made about an expanded Pantheon, with dozens of gods.

In this post I gave The Doctor their domain. The Doctor is The God of Life. Sutekh's antithesis. Being fully honest, my idea for their story relies heavily on The Pantheon existing outside of time and thus being disconnected from the usual flow of events.

Starting in 1911, Sutekh ends up outside of time and the universe, constantly evolving in The Vortex until he becomes "The Mother and Father and Other of all Gods". And eons later, a new god is born, either to Sutekh himself or The Toymaker or Trickster. It doesn't really matter. And this is The God of Life.

Able to see his progression as his opposite deity, Sutekh realises that this is his enemy, The Doctor as a child. And so Sutekh banished the Godling, casting the immortal child out and making them, The Timeless Child.

The Doctor is then taken in by Tecteun and her people discover both time travel and The Doctor's infinite lives as The God of Life and Truest Immortal. Sensing that a God unbound from Time and Space and the laws of the universe they sent him to, Trickter steps in.

Making a deal with Tecteun, The Trickster traps The Doctor on Galifrey, locking their very biology and true form away from them, while giving Tecteun the secret to limited regeneration in the process

And so The Doctor grows up. His memories are locked away by his own adoptive mother. His legacy and true nature hidden even to him. And he meets a friend at The Academy, a brilliant young Time Lord and they pledge to adventure their bright, bold, life filled universe. The Doctor and The Master go their separate ways and The Doctor never realizes why he was so drawn to Koschei. But it's because Koschei for all their flaws was so so full of life and fire and passion, such a bright spark in The Doctor's domain

Everywhere he goes, The Doctor is drawn to preserve life, maintain his domain. He dies and regenerates and dies and regenerates again. And one day, in what he considers his 4th incarnation, he lands in 1911 and battles an Osiran named Sutekh and he wins. Sutekh is blasted into The Time Vortex itself and The Doctor goes on (and we know the story from there)

This is how The Doctor has so many hidden lives and a seemingly endless amount of regenerations. How 15 brought back the butterfly in Space Babies. This is why he is always trying to save everyone. The Doctor and Sutekh, The Gods of Life and Death respectively, each others antithesis and they both start and close their own time loop that binds the two beings together forever

Boy that got a bit rambly. Sorry about that

https://www.tumblr.com/leechlets/753591879734525952/i-think-it-would-be-hilarious-if-the-black?source=share

OH MY GOD!!! im so sorry for only seeing this now it got lost in my inbox.

this is so good, the doctor WOULD be the god of life. (thinking about rose being the bad wolf and saying "I give life" and then the doctor dying to save her from the heart of the tardis killing her) . GODDD. the doctor being born to save people and save life, the master being drawn to him like a moth to a flame. this is so good, eating it.

YOU ARE SO CORRECT AND IM GLAD YOU LIKED MY POST!!

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

hi! I love your blog, do you have any tips for a baby witch!

Hi, and thank you! I won't lie to you, seeing this ask made me laugh (not AT you, but at myself) because I feel like I'm barely out of the crib in terms of "baby witch." I know that's not quite true, I've been around witchcraft my whole life and been actively practicing for about four years, but it still was a shock lol.

I hope you don't mind that this is a huge post, I'm prone to overexplaining! I figured this sort of post was better "too long" than "too short."

I do have lots of things I wish I knew when I first started. I have more stuff I'm working on that might be helpful as well, when I post them.

There is no right way to be a witch. No, seriously. There isn't. People say this, and then you see everyone doing things a certain way, and then the first message gets completely trampled over; but it's true. Some people say you have to learn and master the basics before contacting deities/entities for safety reasons, some people don't really think it matters. Some people are very formal, some aren't. All up to you! Do your own research and figure out what fits your path.

You don't need to do deity work. It's valid to be interested, but if you aren't, don't force it. You also don't need all the tools of the craft and the shiny little trinkets. They're fun, but not needed. All you need to be a witch is yourself. These are similar to the first one, but these specifically I feel need to be said separately.

Don't go all to one source. This was my mistake as a beginner. I used a single discord server because I found research overwhelming, and their list of resources was curated to their specific views on what a beginner could and couldn't do. This led to me feeling like I was doing things wrong.

Pay attention to appropriation. A lot of very common things are appropriated (see; white sage, chakras) and it's generally just a good idea to look into what not to do for the sake of being respectful. This doesn't have to be hours of research- just a quick check before you implement something new that it's not appropriative.

Above all else, do what calls to you. There's so much information, and it's so overwhelming. Go at your own pace, and pick things you feel drawn to! It's not going to be fun if you're not doing what you're interested in.

Join witchy spaces. This has been the biggest help to me. Books, articles, etc. are all helpful... but my biggest help has been other witches sharing anecdotal experience and what witchcraft looks like and feels like written in non-academic language. It could just be the auDHD showing, but I learn better listening to someone infodump than reading a book. Plus, books don't tell you the dumb funny stuff that happens as a witch, in my opinion.

Last but VERY not least; if you are using tools and such, practice safety. Look into what crystals are water/salt/sun safe and such, candle/fire safety, pet safety if you have any, etc. etc. (I have a section on this in my google doc project already, but I'm no expert AT ALL.)

[doorofegress]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤWELCOME TO DOOR OF EGRESS

A world that’s within arms reach, should The Door choose to appear itself before you. Once you receive your keys the question begs: shall you enjoy your time in this strange world or shall you strive to return home?  Simply hold up the right key and a door shall appear to take you where you want to go. A day at the beach? A trek through the woods? Everything within the touch of your fingertips just seconds away.  But should you want to leave, perhaps you can trek into the deserts or dive deep into the caves to try to find a key to bring you home. Though it’s just a rumor, some risk it all for the chance to leave the mansion for good. Should you decide to go this route, beware of the ghost key as it will take you to what seems to be only a shell of your world. And, of course, no great reward goes without risk; monsters rest where the keys may be found. Whatever you decide, we hope you enjoy your stay.

WHAT YOU WILL FIND HERE

★ MFRP, discord rp, drawn/animated/literate sources only ★ Semi-lit and up, we encourage para rp-ing ★ Slice of Life/Adventure RP with a mix of the supernatural ★ Assigned rooms and roommates to promote interactions ★ Plenty of canon muses still available ★ All original powers/abilities of characters retained ★ Active Mods that are available for all member needs ★ In depth Locations and Monster pages to promote character and world building, we encourage battle sequences and self-driven dungeon adventures ★ Lax activity requirements to accommodate our busy adult lives ★ A welcoming community that is always happy to see a new face pop in

REQUIREMENTS TO JOIN

★ Must be 19+ to join, characters must be 18+ ★ Application is required and available in server ★ Tupperbox setup

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤPREMISE | RULES | MASTERLIST | DISCORD

[roleplayfinder]

21, NB, semi-literate (5-10 lines of text is more than enough unless the context demands extra descriptions or dialogue, as long as it's 3rd person, with no ** then you're good) roleplayer with more or less 8 years of experience behind. Looking for a fandomless, medieval/ historical- inspired RP that would include dark themes (from gore to sexual NSFW, so make sure you're not only 18+ but your age is also listed in your bio, otherwise don't bother reacting to this ad), mythological creatures, some magic and all that jazz. I prefer Discord as it's more organized but we can discuss this later. While I do use Castlevania or Claymore as sources of inspiration, that's pretty much all they are, the plot isn't set in them. The RP would be OCxOC, preferably MxM or NBxM (with my character being the guy), immortal x immortal type of ship. He has a calm attitude, is a dominant switch and can be kind of a smartass at times but at the end of the day he's well meaning, if you show respect. Other than that, I will NOT claim that he's some sort of "good guy", he absolutely CAN be the villain who's willing to burn down the world for who he loves (but PLEASE don't come at me with childish or naive, bl or yaoi type of bottoms 💀💀💀). I do tend to include a lot of details from my culture and traditions, as I'm very fond of it, so I'd also encourage you to do the same (I'm kind of a sucker for world building details).

Plots I've had in mind:

1. Nobleman x Guard- My character is a nobleman by default and this plot could really only go one of two ways: either he is part of a rebellion against the current sire, king, leader, whatever, for his wrongdoings, OR he's fighting to not be removed from his position due to political stuff. Your character would be the "ride or die" who has to tag along now (or who knows, maybe he/ they actually enjoy it, who am I to say)

2. Two against the world- Since we're talking about an immortal x immortal ship and I lean more towards dark mythological creatures, I was thinking of a duo of so called "monsters" (by humans of course) who kinda get tired to be hunted down for simply existing and decide to fight back. That being said, this does have enemies to lovers potential, if your character is a good/ celestial being who joins my guy along the way.

As for your character, again, not interested in RPing with a naive or childish character, if he/they lean more towards a masculine appearance that would be great. (not obligatory tho) You can use whatever you want as images (drawn, Picrew, real life face claim, even if the latter is a bit creepy to me, I have a face claim for him. Anything but AI bs) and if you can describe them good enough, I won't need a character sheet. I do have one for my OC tho.

.

[incorrectonceandfuturenerd]

Happy Ten Year Anniversary @onceandfuturenerd! A few of us over on the discord server put together an audio compilation of us talking about how much we love the podcast and what it means to us. There's a transcript below the cut that also has the names of who's speaking in each clip.

Thank you so much for making this wonderful podcast, and congratulations on ten years!

Kat: I love most things about The Once and Future Nerd. The characters, the setting, the genre awareness, the humor. It’s my favourite podcast for a reason, and that’s saying something as I’ve listened to over a hundred. I remember listening to the show for the first time in late 2016, it was... Christmas concert season and I was walking back and forth pretty much exclusively between my dorm, rehearsal, class, and the dining hall. Um. But somehow, despite that very limited time, I managed to listen to all of The Once and Future Nerd over the course of approximately two days, and fell in love with it pretty much immediately. Um, at the time, all of book one was out, which was, uh, less than there is now, but still a significant amount of podcast to listen to over the course of 48 hours. Um. Aside from how wonderful I continue to find the podcast, The Once and Future Nerd has also allowed me to have access to a community I never would have had otherwise. After creating the discord to talk more about the show with a few other folks, I met some of my closest friends. As of sending this message, I have sent-- and I checked right before- before I did this-- in the server alone, 28,638 messages. That is not including direct messages to my friends, that is just directly in the server. Um, the server has also had a long-running Dungeons and Dragons game that’s been going since spring of 2019, and has had multiple bl- book clubs, including one that meets weekly has consistently since spring of 2020. It’s been one of the most fulfilling community experiences of my life, and it all ties back to The Once and Future Nerd. Creating stupid inside jokes like Gy’y Fy’ryy and Elves Have Fur and Antonin being the sexiest the character no matter what any polls say, he better win this last one, I swear... um, it’s been one of the great joys of my life over the last five years. Thank you so much for all the love and joy, humor, tears, and so much more that The Once and Future Nerd has brought to my life and to the lives of many others. The story’s been wonderful, y’all are wonderful, and I hope you continue for many years to come. Happy ten year anniversary.

Nicole: What do I love about The Once and Future Nerd? This is going to sound weird, but I love how specific it is. The Once and Future Nerd is such a peculiar blend of genre and humor and social commentary, that it’s a near perfect filter for finding like-minded people. I’ve met some of my best friends through this podcast and I’m so grateful I found it back in 2016. At the time, it was so hard to find fantasy audio dramas, so I was immediately drawn to The Once and Future Nerd for that alone, uh, when I was trying to search for some. I really liked the concept, enough to make me listen until Monsters, because that’s the chapter that hooked me. I devoured the rest of book one after that, only pausing to sleep and attend lectures... and sometimes listening to it during lectures. Sorry, not sorry to my stats prof. If I had to pick a favourite moment, I would have to say Yllowyyn’s confrontation with Ry’y lo-Th’yyt in Bridges. I think that one is burned into my brain because I was a crowded train trying not to freak out at the time. This podcast means a lot to me as a source of connection with others and it’s just a plain fun story. Thank you, Zach and Christian and everyone who works so hard on it. It’s been going for ten years, and I don’t care if it takes ten more.

RJ: I found The Once and Future Nerd in February of 2017 as a depressed 18-year-old in my first year of university, and I think I listened to everything that had been released at that point in about a week? I love it because of the genre subversion and genre awareness, I love the characters, I love the way it challenges expectations and engages with complex topics with care... I really, really like listening to this podcast, but more than that, I like talking about this podcast. The main thing that makes me keep coming back to The Once and Future Nerd, keep listening, and that makes it important to me, is the community I’ve found in listening to it. I joined the discord server two days after it was created, and that remains the only fandom space where I’ve successfully made actually close online friends. To the point where the friendship has expanded beyond just our shared enjoyment of the podcast into just... being friends. It’s really great to get to know these people, to plan things like this anniversary event with them, to have things like a weekly book club, or collaborations on projects, or just conversations about silly and serious things related to the podcast, and unrelated to the podcast. And none of that would have happened without The Once and Future Nerd so, thank you. Thank you for being the reason that I know these people, thank you for being the reason that I have been inspired to make creative things, from fanart to videos to what have you, uh... I love your show so much, congratulations on ten years, and I can’t wait to hear what comes next.

Dirk: Hey, this is Dirk. Uh, I don’t remember when I started listening to this podcast, it was years ago-- but I do remember being immediately drawn in by the brief and tragic tale of Mr. Fluffy Toes. The mix of humor and sass and sincerity, it immediately struck me. As the story went on, I delighted in Nelson being shockingly genre-savvy about this fantasy world and, honestly? I really enjoyed the fact that the world at large ignored the kids at first. That’s not something you often get in portal fantasies. Uh, I’ve also always deeply enjoyed the queer representation and tongue-in-cheek political commentary... As if that wasn’t enough, you all gave me a chance to write for your podcast. I had so much fun with the Bailey sisters short, and with making up a whole-ass holiday! It was so much fun. And even though I had to recuse myself from the later plotline, I’m still here to listen to how it goes. My inability to write for it has absolutely no bearing on your grace and kindness to me, and even though I dread how it will make me feel because of my own personal issues, I know that I can trust whatever it turns out to be. Like so many pod- things in this podcast, it’s gonna be sensitive, sometimes funny, sometimes deeply tragic, or terrifying, and it will never punch down. Because that’s the kind of podcast you have made. Happy ten year anniversary, thank you so much for all that you’ve given us. And I hope you can continue making whatcha love for as long as you want to be making it. And like... Let’s be real. As long as you’re making this, we’re gonna be here for it, so... Thank you.

Oriana: I had the podcast recommended to me by a friend who was very active on the reddit at the time. I love that The Once and Future Nerd is not afraid to look long and hard at The Implications of a lot of fantasy tropes. I kept listening because I wanted to know what new ideas would be explored next. One of my favorite moments is the speech that Traft gives about how the Princes of Iorden do alchemy. The Once and Future Nerd is the first thing that I got to write for that has an established audience and... that was very cool. Thank you for everything.

Aja: Hey guys my name is Aja, and I just wanted to say congrats on ten years of a fantastic podcast. I started listening to The Once and Future Nerd back in 2017, 2016, not long after I’d gotten my bachelor’s degree from college and right as I was starting to realize that I wanted to go back to school to get my teaching degree. So it- it came at a really special time in my life. What kept me coming back over all these years is the fantastic character development, especially for the kids, uh, in the story, but also for everybody else, and I’ve also just really appreciated the, uh, subversion, I guess, of fantasy tropes. I think it’s kept the story really interesting and really relevant, and it’s- it’s so real, despite being a fantasy story, so. Thank you so much for all of your hard work, and I look forward to listening for... as long as you keep making this podcast. Thanks guys.

Aster: The Once and Future Nerd is one on an ever-growing list of podcasts that I deeply love despite being upwards of a year behind on, and every time I am able to get back to listening to it, I am in awe of the incredible world that it shows. And a special thanks to the podcast for finally, really, dragging me down into the incredible world of audio drama fandoms.

Teddy: Well, first of all congrats on ten years, that is a tremendously long time to work on a project, and it’s an excellent project to have been worked on. I’ve loved the podcast for... a while. I’m not quite as into it as I used to be, but I still listen to the episodes whenever they come out. Uh... I first listened to the podcast all the way back in, I believe 2016? Uh, when I was in college. One of my friends was listening to it at a DnD session and I heard just one clip of it-- I think it was the scene where Regan had a threesome with the barkeep and his partner? I don’t remember exactly what happened in that scene but, uh... [laughs] it was interesting enough to draw my attention, and I talked to my friend about what the podcast was about, and I decided to go ahead listen to it, and so I listened to it. It hit all the right notes for me. I really loved the emphasis on diversity, and the science that went into it. I thought the science... um, the way science and magic integrated in the show was really fantastic and clever. You know, I really loved the characters. I think I listened to the entire podcast, up until the beginning of covid, about... three or four times through, and then since the pandemic when everything’s slowed down I’ve only listened to it another couple times since then. But, even though it’s no longer quite my main fandom or anything... But I think that I’m going to continue listening to it for as long as it comes out. Even if it’s never my big passion, it’s gonna be one of those quiet, comfortable, familiar things that will be a thread woven throughout the path of the rest of my life. Or not the rest of my life, but, you know, a good portion of it. However long- however much longer it goes, um. But, yeah, uh, congrats again on ten years of The Once and Future Nerd, and thank you for creating it. It’s really fantastic, I love it so much.

Rachel: So I found The Once and Future Nerd shortly after the pandemic started. A friend reached out to me who, um, I had met in college, and she asked to connect and we started calling every week, and we eventually started listening to this podcast together because she was already a fan, and she thought I would love it-- she was totally right. Um [small laugh], and we listened to this for almost a year, almost like a book club. Um, and we talked about it, and we got deep into the themes which was really enriching for me, that’s one of my passions, I got a degree in it. Uh, in, um, literature, so just picking apart stories and I-I was- I’ve always been impressed by how crunchy it is. How the characters feel fleshed out and stood apart from each other, and how so many tropes you think you understand and then you guys subverted them. Um. And then, while I don’t listen to The Once and Future Nerd right now, I have other podcasts that I do listen to, and before listening to The Once and Future Nerd with Kat I was not a podcast person. So, because of this podcast I actually have maintained a friendship, and I’ve gained a whole new ways to access stories, and it’s been pretty marvellous. And I’ve loved that a lot. So I’d like to thank the creators for those two sparks of joy in my life.

Kellie: Congrats on ten years! Um. I have not been listening to The Once and Future Nerd for ten years, I’ve been listening more like the past, like, one and half or so years, um, and I am so glad that I started listening. This podcast means a lot to me, it is one of my favourites, and not only is it just individually enjoyable for me, it’s also brought me closer to a lot of people, um, the existence of the podcast itself has brought me into a community that I value so deeply, and brought me close to so many people who I just love and adore. So, I mean, you know, obviously you’re doing something really right if, uh, you’re bringing people close together for lifetime friendships, uh, by making, you know, content. And that’s amazing in and of itself. But also, just, the podcast itself is so good. I mean, first of all, it’s great quality, it’s, you know, these... these wonderful little stories that are so, so gay. [laughs] And that analyze interesting topics in a really nuanced way. I can’t express the appreciation that I have for the way that y’all talk about these topics cause they’re always- they’re handled so well. Um. So, instead... [laughs] so instead of trying to express that, um, I will instead express that I just love how... I love when Arlene and Gwen are gay. Like, that’s just great. You know? It’s fantastic. And they’re so, so gay, and it’s so, so wonderful every single time. [sighs] And also Regan is just so hot. You know? Like. Uh, I... [sighs] Good for her, you know? Good for her. And good for y’all for- for having this podcast be- be going on for so long and still going strong. It’s- it’s so much fun and I’m so excited to keep listening to it. I’m not all the way caught up! But I’m working on it and I’m r- just enjoying every moment along the way. Thank you for what you do, cause what you do is so great. It’s incredible. Thank you.

Drak: The Once and Future Nerd. Um. What it means to me. So I had really bad migraines a couple years ago. Uh, to the point of, I had to blindfold myself for days and weeks at a time, uh, in order to avoid a debilitating migraine. And, um, so I found myself suddenly having to navigate the world without being able to see. The worst part of it was the boredom because I couldn’t read fanfiction, I couldn’t, uh, do most of my crafting hobbies, I couldn’t play video games. Um, obviously there are, you know, ways that people can do those things while blind, but I did not have any of those accommodations at the time. And so I started listening to podcasts, and I found The Once and Future Nerd and while listening to it, sitting in my room, by myself, uh, blind and in pain, The Once and Future Nerd took me away from my loneliness and my boredom and my pain and, you know, kind of, uh, saved my life. Uh, because I had something to help me get through a difficult period of my life, and, um. On top of that, you know, I-I love how much care and thought the crew and the cast and everyone involved puts into the story, um, in terms of being, like, sensitive about topics and as well as, like, trying to, um, provide good representation for, uh, marginalized voices, and um. I just. God, I love this podcast so much. Thank you, thank you so much for everything y’all do. The Once and Future Nerd is... I-I recommend it to everyone I know, even if they don’t like podcasts because I-I really think it’s that good. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Sen: I love this podcast for its tapestry of fantasy tropes, the funny takes, and the moments of awesome. For multifaceted, diverse characters that I hadn’t encountered in other mediums before, and [sighs] well, for a gorgeous sound design that brings it all together. I found this podcast back in the middle of 2018. I was in a really, really bad place then, I was failing my classes, um, due to depression and anxiety for which I had begun taking medications too, which was not easy to adjust to. I just- I couldn’t concentrate on anything at all. So, I ended up searching for, uh, podcasts, and specifically what I would do back then is I would read the scripts and then I’d decide to listen to the whole thing later, you know. I read the first two episodes, then I just decided fuck it. I’m gonna listen. This podcast, and a few others, they were what got me through a really difficult time, but, you know, what made me keep listening then after that was just that it keeps on getting better. Personally, my favourite moment in TOaFN is, uh, episode three of I’ve Been Working on the Whale Road. Because, okay, yes, there are the pilot- uh, pirates, and there is Maddy Groves, but then there is also Bryce’s death. An ignoble death, nobly done. I get emotional thinking about it, but I think the way that Bryce died, it touches you, I think. And I think that... that balance between the humor and the silliness and the sincerity, and the love, I think, uh, it’s always- it touches you. I love this show for its emphasis on storytelling, the words “people are the stories they tell, power is who gets to tell those stories” th-they’re ingrained in my mind at this point. I resonate with the philosophy so much, and I’m so grateful to this show for getting me through tough times and for teaching me things about storytelling, about myself. And for the people that I have met through this show. In the discord server, the long-running DnD game, um, those people that, like, I got close to, and the book club folks, er, that I get to chat with on occasion. They make me laugh and they make me smile and I can confide in them, they’re always there and... I just- I- Thank you so much, for giving me all of that.

CJ: Congrats on ten years!

[friskrisdreemurr]

Mutual Benefits

Neggie/Negan Smith x Maggie Rhee || Rated: E || Words: 3.4k || CW: Dubious Consent

Summary: Negan wants something special from Maggie in return for helping her rescue her son.

A/N: Shout-out to the people in the Neggie Discord server who encouraged me to write this! :] I've been wanting to write this idea for a while but was scared I shouldn't write it because it was dark. Thank you guys! <3

AO3 || FF.net || ↓

......

Maggie slowly made her way towards the motel rooms, in search of Negan. She's been searching for him for weeks now as she needs his help and the bartender at this place tipped her off that he was here. She made it to the rooms and began searching. In the first one, she could hear a couple arguing but she did not recognize either voice. The next few rooms showed no signs of life but then she came across one where, in the window, she could see clothes and various other items lying around, indicating that someone was living here. Slowly, she opened the door to the room and entered. There was no sound of anyone inside. She quietly made her way through the room, checking the bathroom and closet, but no one was here. Maggie began looking over the items in the room for any hint towards Negan. She made her way to the dresser and saw two items that stuck out to her. There was a bracelet, which she picked up and inspected. It looked much like the one she remembers Annie wearing. She then placed it down and picked up the other item, a knife that looks similar to one that Negan had.

"Making yourself at home?" A voice suddenly said, startling Maggie. She whipped around to face the source of the offending sound, knife still in hand and ready to strike if needed.

"Dammit, Negan, you scared me," she scolded the culprit of her fright. He was standing in the doorway of the room and he laughed. "Sorry. But I could've done a lot worse considering you're trespassing in my room," he told her. Maggie rolled her eyes at that. Negan came in fully and closed the door behind him. He took another step but Maggie instantly instinctively held up the knife in a threatening manner. Negan stopped in place and put his hands up in surrender. "Hey, relax. I'm just going to sit on the bed," he tried reassuring her. Maggie studied him for a moment and then nodded in approval. Negan did as he said he would and moved over to the end of one of the beds to sit on it. Maggie moved to the other end of the room to create distance between them in case he tried anything.

"Where's Annie and your kid?" Maggie asked him, genuinely curious. Besides the bracelet, she hadn't seen any sign that they were living here in this room with him.

Negan sighed and a forelong look briefly crossed his face. "It's… complicated. But I'm here alone," he simply said. Instead of explaining, his expression changed back and he decided to change the topic back to them. "So, what brings you here to visit little old me? Either you're not here to kill me or you have gotten seriously rusty," he teased her with a small smile on his face.

Maggie reached into her pocket to pull out a piece of folded paper and walked over to Negan. She held it out for him to take and hesitantly, he did. Maggie moved back to where she was before as Negan opened the paper to look at it. It was a wanted poster for him that featured a drawn picture of his face, a description of the crime he had committed, and a warning to people about who he was and to stay away from him.

"Goddamn, for a wanted man I look good," he smugly said in response. He looked up at Maggie. "Can I keep this?" He asked her. She didn't respond. "I'm keeping this," he told her and folded it back up to put in his pocket. "But you still haven't told me why you're here, Maggie."

"A few weeks back, I got raided. Outnumbered, overpowered, stole all our grain. Said they'd be back in a month for more. A month after that…" She paused, getting a little choked up at the memory. "Took a hostage as collateral."

Negan's face fell at the realization of what she was saying. "They took your kid."

"I tracked them all the way up to the Hudson, by then they'd already made it across."

"Across to what?"

"Manhattan."

Negan sighed. "I hate to even ask, but how do I figure into this, Maggie?" He asked her.

"The man who's got Hershel, they call him The Croat," she stated matter of factly. Negan smirked and put up his hands in a shrugging gesture, as if he didn't know what she was talking about.

"Bullshit," she snapped at him. "You know him. When he scaled our walls; when he had us surrounded in the dark; right before he took my son, do you know what he did?" She asked and then whistled out the all-too familiar Savior whistle. Negan cringed at the sound and memories it brought back.

Maggie noticed his reaction. "That rings a bell, doesn't it? It did for me. That's the last thing I heard before I met you."

"Oh, that Croat," Negan feigned realization. Maggie shook her head. "Alright, so what you're thinking is, since I knew this guy back in the day when I was running the show, that maybe I had some special insight into his modus operandi. Or, hell, maybe I could just sweet talk him into giving you your boy back. We're talking about the same Croat? Let's just say that there were a lot of psychos in my crew back then but he always stood out as an exceptionally insane son of a bitch. So the odds are, if it's The Croat that's got him-"

"No," Maggie interrupted him before he could finish that sentence. She couldn't accept that as a possibility.

Negan sighed again. "Alright, tell me this: why would I help you?"

"Because you owe me-"

"Because I owe you, right," he interrupted her this time, his tone slightly laced with annoyance at the fact that she was still trying to use what he did as leverage to get what she wanted.

"You're the last person that I wanted to ask for help," she angrily said. "It doesn't look like you got too many options yourself. Because if I found you here, the Marshals will too. Far as I can tell, you have exhausted every shithole."

Negan considered his options for a moment. He knew that she was probably right, it was only a matter of time before the Marshals managed to find him. It wasn't like he was against the idea of helping her and he was concerned for her kid but even so, if he were to help her, he still wanted to get something more out of it. "And what would I get for helping you?"

"Maybe the knowledge that you'd actually done something decent for once in your life." Negan laughed at that and shook his head, which annoyed Maggie further. But she relented. "Fine. Weapons, food when we can produce more, whatever supplies you want, you can have."

"Now why would I want that when these folks I'm working for here have already set me up with everything I need?" He smirked at her.

Maggie was getting more irritated by the second. "Well, then what the hell do you want?"

Negan stayed silent for a moment, a thought of something that he did want from her crossing his mind. It was a perverted thing to consider but he couldn't help himself as his eyes scanned over her body. Ever since he first laid eyes on her all those years ago on the night he made her a widow, he's desired her carnally. Maggie noticed the way he was looking at her and the realization of what he was thinking hit her.

"You're a fucking pig, Negan," she said in disgust.

"I know," he simply said in response.

"You can't be serious."

Negan grinned at her in a way that could only be described as wolf-like. "But I am, darling. You want your boy back? This is the price." He knew it was wrong of him to try taking advantage of her like this but who knows if he would ever have a chance of having her again? He knew there was also a chance that she would kill him for even suggesting such a thing but that was a risk he was willing to take.

Maggie stood there in shock, considering her options. She knew that she shouldn't even be entertaining this idea, that she should just stab him to death with the knife she had in her hand for even daring to ask this of her and go find her son herself… But she wasn't sure if she could do it without him. Little did he know that her story about stolen grain was bullshit and that what The Croat actually wanted was Negan himself. She had been intending to trade him in exchange for her son and so the plan wouldn't work without him. Going there without upholding her end of the deal would likely get her and her son killed.

Negan noticed the hesitance in her, that she was actually considering his offer, and his cock twitched at the possibility that he was going to get what he wanted. He sat up straight, leaned back on his hands, and spread his legs, exposing his crotch to her. He reached a hand down to palm his cock over his clothes and stroked, groaning at the feeling. The look in his eyes as he stroked himself was like that of a predator hungry for its next meal looking at its prey. Maggie sucked in a breath at the intense sight and looked away from him.

"How do I know that you'll actually hold up your end of the deal after?" She finally spoke up to ask him.

"Heh, I guess you don't… But you know me, Maggie. I'm a man of my word."

Maggie was silent for a moment as she took in what he said. She knew that he was right, he was a lot of things but no one could say that he was a liar who didn't keep his promises. As much as it pains her to admit, she knows giving Negan what he wants is the best option here even though she really doesn't want. Before she could change her mind, she put the knife back on the dresser and walked over to Negan, got down on her knees between his legs, and began undoing the belt and zipper on his pants.

"Ah, good girl," Negan said with a smile on his face. He lifted his hips slightly so that Maggie could finish pulling his pants and underwear down just enough to set his cock free.

"Don't even think about backing out of the deal after this or I will kill you, Negan," she warned him in a serious tone. A laugh started coming out of Negan's mouth but was interrupted by a groan as Maggie took his cock in her hand and gave him a teasing stroke. He was already hard and she stroked him a few times before she jutted her tongue out to lick the tip of his cock, causing Negan to groan again. She closed her mouth over the tip and sucked, making him moan. She took more of him into her mouth and began moving her head, taking as much of him in her mouth as she could on every stroke.

Negan moaned and moved one of his hands to weave through her hair to rest on her head. "Mmm, Maggie," he moaned. Heat pooled in Maggie's gut at hearing him moan her name. She didn't want to be turned on by this but the sounds he was making combined with the way he was gently caressing her head were lighting a fire inside her. Maggie let out a small moan and the vibrations of it sent a bolt of pleasure through Negan's cock, making him moan loudly.

Suddenly, Negan took a hold of her hair and pulled her off his cock. "Was too close," he explained, panting. "Take off your clothes and get on the bed on your hands and knees," he instructed her. Maggie was hesitant but nodded. She got up and began removing her clothes until she had nothing on except for the necklace that displayed her wedding ring. Negan also got up to remove all of his clothes as well while she was doing the same. After they were both naked, Maggie moved to get on the bed like Negan told her to. When she was in position, she felt both a surge of fear and arousal flow through her at the vulnerable position she was in.

A breath caught in Negan's throat seeing her displayed like this. She looked stunning and so inviting. "Damn," Negan breathed out in awe and Maggie blushed. Negan couldn't believe that he was finally going to have her the way he's always wanted her and it excited him.

Negan got onto the bed behind her on his knees. He ran a finger through her folds and felt the wetness there. "Mmm, so wet already…" he said in a lustful tone. He moved his hand down and positioned it so that his thumb could touch her clit. He rolled the sensitive bud around and Maggie just barely stifled her moan, not wanting him to know how turned on she was. Negan took a hold of his cock and stroked himself as he stroked her, their arousals building in unison.

Negan removed his hand from her and Maggie almost whined at the loss of contact. He ran the tip of his cock through her folds a few times, coating himself in her arousal, and then pushed in until he bottomed out. Maggie gasped at the sudden feeling of being stretched after so many years of not having this. Negan moaned at the feeling of her tight heat and pulled almost all the way out before thrusting fully back in. He put a hand on her back between her shoulder blades and pushed her down until her face was on the bed before grabbing ahold of her hips and setting a fast pace. Maggie gripped the bedsheets with one hand and used her other to cover her mouth to stifle any moans that might slip out. She hated herself for being aroused by whoring herself out to her husband's killer and she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing she was.

Negan looked down at where they were connected and the sight of his cock covered in her juices entering her drove him crazy. He moaned out and thrust a little faster. A sound like a muffled whimper came from Maggie and when he looked at her face, he saw her hand over her mouth and a look of ecstasy on her face. Negan smirked and groaned, realizing that she was feeling as much pleasure as him and was trying to hide it.

Negan pulled out suddenly, making Maggie whimper again, and grabbed her to maneuver her onto her back. He needed to see her fully as he fucked her. For a moment, he sat there and took in the sight of her. "Beautiful," he thought. He then noticed that she had kept her necklace on, the wedding ring on full display. Annoyance and jealousy flowed through him at the sight. He moved suddenly and entered her again without warning, causing her to moan and cover her mouth again. Negan grabbed her wrists and pinned them on either side of her head, making her gasp and causing a bolt of arousal to flow through her.

"Enough of that. I want to hear your moans as I fuck you," he growled. Maggie swallowed a moan at that. Negan began thrusting again, setting the same pace he did before. He changed angles and managed to find the sweet spot inside her, making her throw her head back and moan. He kept up his fast-paced thrusts, making sure to hit that spot every time. Maggie's resolve was breaking and more moans were slipping out against her will as she couldn't hide how she felt anymore. She didn't want to enjoy this but her body was betraying her as it's been so long since she's been with someone this way and the pleasure was overwhelming.

"Yeah, you like that, don't you?" Negan groaned out and Maggie whimpered, which Negan took as a yes. He removed one of his hands from her wrist and lifted the end of the necklace where the wedding ring was in his hand. "Still wearing this… Makes me think you haven't been fucked in years, huh?" Maggie blushed but hesitantly nodded. "Heh, I knew it." In a sudden movement, Negan yanked the necklace hard enough to break it off Maggie's neck, making her gasp, and he threw it across the room. "You don't need that anymore. You're mine now," he growled.

Maggie wasn't sure if he was serious but she still wanted to argue with him and tell him "that wasn't part of the deal," but before she could say anything, he released her other wrist to plant his hands on the bed for better leverage and increased the pace and intensity of his thrusts. Negan moaned and Maggie let out a sound that sounded like a mix between a gasp and a moan. She gripped the sheets under her in pleasure, holding on as he practically fucked her into the mattress. The room was filled with the sounds of their moans, skin slapping against skin, and the bed creaking. If anyone was in the rooms adjacent to them or passing by outside, Maggie was sure they could hear them.

The pressure inside Maggie was building but she tried tamping down her release, not wanting to give into it. She was ashamed enough already from how much pleasure she was feeling and showing from this, she did not want to orgasm because of it. Negan could sense that she was close and holding back. He reached down to stroke her clit again. "Come on, come for me, Maggie," he coaxed her. The combination of his thrusts, his fingers teasing her clit, and his encouragement were too much for her and it sent her over the edge. "Fuck," Maggie whined and arched her back as she came. Shockwaves of pleasure rolled through her as fucked her through her orgasm… and Maggie was disgusted at herself for it.

"Fuck, good girl," Negan praised her as her walls clamped down on his cock. Maggie whimpered and after she came down from her high, Negan removed his hand from her clit and began chasing his own release. He was already close as the feeling of her wet heat was overwhelming him. He was ecstatic that he finally had her this way, albeit under questionable circumstances, but he didn't care as the pleasure of her was worth it. A few more thrusts and Negan came, spilling his seed inside her. He leaned down to kiss her as he rode out his orgasm, moaning into her mouth. Maggie moaned as well and a bit of pleasure shot through her at the kiss and feeling his cock twitching inside her.

When he finished, he leaned back from her lips and looked her in the eyes. "Thank you, darling," he said in a voice too sweet for Maggie's liking considering the situation. "But this rescue mission of yours seems very dangerous… I may need more payments in the future to be properly compensated. That is, if you don't want me abandoning you before we can get your boy back." Originally, Negan had planned on this being the only time he requested this from her but now that he finally had a taste of her, he couldn't let her go.

Stunned by this, Maggie nodded before she could really think. "Hmm, good," Negan said and grinned at her, that predatory look returning. He pulled out of her and got out of the bed to clean up and get dressed. Maggie laid there without moving, the realization of what she had just agreed to hitting her. Maggie would have never had sex with him but she just did and agreed to more of it if he wanted so that he will help her. In a way, she did enjoy it as she hadn't gotten to have that with anyone in years and it had felt amazing, but the fact that it was Negan of all people made her sick. A feeling of dread washed over her knowing that she'd have to continue pleasing him if she wanted him to help her. But she will do it, as she would do anything for her son to be brought home safe.

......

A/N: There may or may not be more chapters to this. No promises though so I'm keeping it as a one-shot for now.

Thanks for reading! <3

[theimaginatrix27]

I have realised that Odo is the reason I started paying attention to Deep Space Nine

I was talking about this with @roguetelepaths on Discord, but there was enough information for me to make a proper post out of it, so here I am, doing that.

See, when I was a kid, I usually got drawn into a show by acquiring an interest in a particular character. I first became aware of Farscape because of Rygel, I started hanging around when my father was watching rented episodes of Voyager because of Captain Janeway/the Doctor/Tuvok (they're tied, I'm sorry), Teal'c drew me into Stargate: SG-1 (closely followed by Daniel).

With Deep Space Nine, this character was Odo.

Before I go on, you should understand a couple things.

My Dad had cable when I was eleven/twelve.

I did not live with him, and did not see him every weekend, so I did not always have access to this cable service.

I therefore did not have access to Star Trek series in order for a very very long time.

There was a Trek block on one of the mixed-bag sort of channels this cable service had (there were several, but this was before Australia had a dedicated Sci-fi channel). It was on Saturday evenings and had TOS, TNG, DS9 and Voyager, in that order, starting at 7-30. If it wasn't Saturday night, I probably wouldn't have been allowed to stay up to watch Voyager, but it was, so I was.

Unfortunately for my future self, it was smack in the middle of the time period during which my brain was tuned to Dragon Ball Z all the time unless I had to focus on something else. Also I was like, eleven. My life had been pretty complicated already so I wasn't a sweet summer child who thought nothing bad ever happened, but I was not yet equipped to properly grasp the complexities of the Trek I was exposed to, especially DS9.

I know I was present when this channel ran Move Along Home (I can still remember the Allamaraine chant, though I did not process most of the rest of that episode), and I think I at least saw an ad saying that Saturday's episode was If Wishes Were Horses, if only because Rumpelstiltskin was in that episode and that's a weird thing to have in a Sci-fi show, my little brain thought. (I had not yet been exposed to Q. That's a story for another day).

The first episode I actively remember choosing to watch was The Forsaken. Because I'd seen the ad for that, and wait, this guy turns into a liquid? Cool! I wanna see this now!

This was also the first time I ever saw Lwaxana Troi, as far as I recall, so I got one hell of a first impression of her (I liked her very well by the end). But I was here for Odo, and I zeroed in on him. And learned both about his biology and witnessed a rant that established his personhood in my mind—it is not in fact nice to treate a shapeshifting being like a source of entertainment.

By the end of the episode, I was absolutely ride or die for this character. And he's the reason I started paying attention to DS9.

The only other episode I clearly remember watching during this period was Heart of Stone, because it was another Odo-centric episode I was fortunate to be present for, and this first experience of that episode had me absolutely shipping Kiraodo (I have discussed that before in my Kiraodo post), but before that, there was the reveal of where Odo got his name, and that absolutely pulled at my little twelve-year-old heartstrings, which is why I absolutely wanted his love for Kira to be reciprocated, because are you kidding? He just said his name meant "unknown sample"/"nothing", I was so wanting to hug him after that, and then he confessed love for this other character, and I love him, please let Kira love him too... (Also this was my first encounter with the Voice of the Link/the Female Founder, owing to how many episodes I'd missed due to extenuating circumstances beyond my control, and I wanted the mean Changeling to be proved wrong.)

So those two episodes informed my view of Odo for the next several years and beyond, and for a while there, he was hands-down my favourite character on DS9.

Over the next few years, however, my Odo love dropped to a simmer in the back of my mind because I had zero access to any Trek owing to moving away from my Dad and our subsequent permanent estrangement (long story, don't wanna get into it, it's ... there's a lot of underlying stuff irrelevant to this post). Eventually, Mum was able to get cable for us, a few months at a time, and that cable service had a Sci-fi channel now, and I had a connection in my bedroom, and could watch Star Trek without having to ask to use the family TV, and I got back into the Trek series I'd watched parts of with Dad, but grew to like them on my own terms, for my own reasons.

And at some point, I got to watch The Begotten (before Broken Link because I was at the mercy of reruns and also life made me miss episodes frequently).

And I already loved Odo thanks to the above experiences, but watching him with a baby of his own species (before Mora showed up) was so heartwarming, even if he was sad about being a solid at the time. And then the baby sacrificed itself to give him his powers back, and Oh no there went my heart again. And this basically cemented my love for Odo and his storyline and his people (even the ones that were mean to him sometimes).

I love the whole cast now, I was falling in love with the other characters when I watched The Begotten, but Odo is the reason I even started watching the show, and I have him to thank for my deep abiding love for it today.

And in light of this, it's no surprise I jumped onto the Dominion Fan train so fast. Odo needs a hug, I've always known this, but the more I learned about the Dominion races the more I realised they all did/do.

I can't undo the bad writing choices the showrunners made, or those other fanfiction authors have made, but I sure as hell can be niceys to them in my own stories.

Now, if you excuse me, I have to do something about my Dominion Week backlog. Dx