#the ones that are like if you give a mouse a cookie

[charleslelurk]

If you give a man a baby

Carlos just stares as the fan hands her baby, her eleventh month old, to Lando and steps back with her phone. The baby is wearing a dinosaur onesie, feet tucked away but soft, hair tufty and sparse. Lando stands contrapose, one hip helping support the baby as Lando has him under the arms and around the belly. His big hands covering almost all of the dinosaur pattern as he holds the baby securely.

“Look here, sweetie!” The fan tells her baby, trying to get a picture he will never remember of the time he met two Formula 1 drivers at the Monaco mall. The baby looks at the camera, opens his mouth and makes a joyful noise at his mother, little hands flapping. Carlos watches Lando smile, at the baby and then the camera. Carlos is still staring at Lando, holding the chubby and gleeful baby, when the flash goes off.

“Jeez, Carlos,” Lando murmurs against his lips when Carlos presses him into the wall by the front door. “What got—got you going?”

Carlos just makes a long noise against Lando’s lips and grips his hips as he tilts his head more to lick into Lando’s mouth. Carlos toes off his shoes, kicking them to the side as he refuses to stop kissing Lando. He realizes what Carlos is doing with his feet and is smiling into the kiss.

“Stop laughing,” Carlos tells him when they break apart. Carlos is already grabbing Lando’s arm to drag him towards the bedroom. When Carlos glances back, Lando is giving him a toothy little smile.

“What was it?” He asks as Carlos pushes through the bedroom door and pulls Lando down onto the bed with him. He comes easily, folding his legs under his hips as he settles over Carlos’s lap. Lando gets the same toothy grin on his face again when he realizes how hard Carlos is in his jeans. He bites his lip and looks at Carlos with a thoughtful expression.

“Was it the sweater I tried on in Acme?” Carlos shakes his head as he gets his fingers under the hem of Lando’s hoodie and peels it off of him, Lando’s curls springing free from the neckline as Carlos tosses it away. Lando’s nipples are pebbling at the cold room and Carlos leans forwards to get his mouth on one. Above him, Lando gasps and buries one hand into Carlos’s hair, holding his face to his chest.

Lando’s voice is tight when he speaks again. “Was it when I pointed out that fucking leather shop?” Carlos makes a negative noise but doesn’t remove his mouth from Lando’s skin. He gently takes the nipple in his teeth and is rewarded by the way Lando’s entire body jumps. “Wasn’t the fucking kink joke?”

Carlos noses his way up to Lando’s neck. When Lando used his hand in Carlos’s hair to pull his face back, Carlos goes easily. They stare at one another a moment, and that’s when Carlos realizes Lando is rocking his hips down into Carlos’s hard cock in gentle, rhythmic little pushes.

Lando knits his brow. “What was it, Carlos?”

He feels like a panting mess, knows he’s looking at Lando with a dark eyes and pink lips and messy hair. He might as well admit it, isn’t keeping it to himself for any real reason.

Carlos swallows hard, throat bobbing. Lando’s eyes snap to it and then back to Carlos’s face.

Carlos moves his hands from Lando’s thighs to his ass, pushing his hips to press harder into Carlos’s.

“The baby,” Carlos says, almost breathlessly. “You holding the baby.”

Lando’s brow knits before smoothing out and cheeky grin pulling his cheeks. “Carlos?”

Carlos makes a noncommittal sound as Lando begins to tease, the evidence of it clear in the tone of his voice.

Lando pushes Carlos down onto the mattress, back flat as his legs still hang off the foot. Lando crawls over Carlos, lines their pelvis’s up and grinds down hard. Lando is clearly hard too, hisses when their bulges press together. “Carlos, do you—ah” Lando cuts himself off as Carlos tightly grips his ass. “Do you want to put a baby in me?”

Carlos groans, and slides a hand up to Lando’s head to bring him down for another bruising kiss. It’s answer enough.

[aalghul]

I was just possessed by a vision of Duke crashing all of jaykyle’s dates accidentally. the first time, he just happens to be hanging out with Jason when Kyle visits Gotham, and Kyle invites him out with them instead of kicking Duke out (like you’re supposed to do with younger siblings but Kyle wouldn’t know that because he’s an only child so it’s not his fault).

And then Duke just keeps popping up, all the time, in comical ways. Jaykyle are getting milkshakes in Brooklyn? Duke was already hiding under their table before they even sat down (why was he there? Who knows. He claims it was for a case).

Kyle takes Jason to R’ann for a vacation and they’ve been on the planet for all of 5 minutes before they see Duke in handcuffs because he somehow managed to get arrested on a whole different planet from the one he should be on. jaykyle dealt with that and decided they’d just have to keep him on their vacation. Batman was hysterical when they got back a week later because he literally had no clue how Duke had vanished off the face of the earth. Duke had selfies of him (with jaykyle at every romantic event they’d planned) on a different planet though so he didn’t really care

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

See the thing is. My La Resistance animatic made me REALLY wanna make a Valentino I Can Change animatic. But if I make THAT, then that might lead to an Angel/Husk/Sir Pentious What Would Brian Boitano Do? animatic, and from there? Probably nothing else tbh but STILL THATS A LOT OF FUCKIN WORK-

[doctorwhoisadhd]

im at almost 7.1k words in my 12jack sequel

[yappacadaver]

Bg3 fan demands go insane

[snckt]

i need to take off this lipstick

[sunlightfeeling]

yeah…that’s a pretty good response to that one…

tsuyoshi’s still happy tho ☺️

[jungwnies]

cat cafe | max verstappen

୨ৎ : featuring : max verstappen ୨ৎ : synopsis (requested by 🦈) : going on a date to a cat cafe 🐈‍⬛

୨ৎ : genre : fluff ୨ৎ : word count : 680

୨ৎ masterlist ୨ৎ 10k event | masterlist ୨ৎ

ᡣ𐭩 a/n : plsss this is so cute omfg ����

you don’t even get a full step inside the café before max practically melts.

there’s a sleepy ginger curled up on the window ledge. a black and white tuxedo cat sprawled out across the checkout counter. somewhere in the back, a small gray blur streaks by, chasing a toy mouse like its life depends on it.

max’s eyes light up like a kid in a candy store. he doesn’t even hide it.

“okay,” he whispers under his breath, turning to you with a grin so boyish it makes your heart skip. “best idea you’ve ever had.”

you raise a brow. “even better than letting you teach me how to drive manual?”

“way better,” he says instantly. “no offense.”

the girl at the front desk gives you each a lint roller and a pair of house slippers, then waves you in with a soft “feel free to sit anywhere.” max is already crouched by the nearest scratching post before she finishes the sentence, fingers outstretched to a chunky tabby who immediately rolls over and exposes its belly like they’re old friends.

“look at you,” you laugh, toeing off your shoes and sinking into one of the floor cushions nearby. “absolute cat whisperer.”

“they know i’m one of them,” max says without looking up.

you snort. “so humble, too.”

the café is warm and soft, with low lighting and the smell of brewed tea and vanilla cookies in the air. there’s lo-fi music playing, a few couples scattered around with drinks and cat treats, but it all feels peaceful. safe.

max eventually joins you on the floor, two cats in his lap and one trying to climb his shoulder. his cap is tilted back just enough to show a few messy strands of hair, and his smile hasn’t left since you walked in.

he leans over and whispers, “i want, like, four.”

you blink. “cats?”

he nods. “for now.”

you roll your eyes, but the warmth in your chest is undeniable. “you’re ridiculous.”

he grins. “you’re the one who brought me here.”

you nudge his leg with your foot. “you’re lucky you’re cute.”

he raises a brow. “i’m lucky?”

a small gray kitten pads over and curls up in your lap, purring immediately. max watches you with the softest look — the kind he only gets when he thinks you’re not paying attention.

“i could stay here forever,” he says quietly.

you hum, brushing your fingers through the kitten’s fur. “i’d get jealous.”

“of the cats?”

“yeah.”

he smiles. “they’re great, but they don’t hold my hand during takeoff. or tell me they love me when i’m three time zones away.”

you glance up at him, surprised by the tenderness in his voice.

he shrugs. “don’t look at me like that. i’m allowed to be soft.”

you smile. “you are. you just usually do it with more sarcasm.”

“yeah, well,” he looks down at the orange tabby now nestled against his chest. “you bring it out of me.”

by the time your drinks arrive — hot chocolate for you, iced coffee for max — there are six cats between you, and neither of you has moved in over twenty minutes. you sip carefully, balancing the sleeping kitten on your thigh, while max snaps a photo of the black cat now curled inside his hoodie.

“i’m naming him turbo,” he says. “because he’s fast.”

you squint. “you named the sleepiest cat in here turbo?”

he shrugs. “it’s aspirational.”

before you leave, you both buy a sticker from the donation box and promise the staff you’ll be back. max practically has to be dragged away, gently prying turbo off his sweater and giving him one last scratch behind the ears.

as you step out into the cool evening air, he grabs your hand, fingers lacing through yours like instinct.

“that was the best date ever,” he says, swinging your hands between you. “i didn’t even know i needed that.”

you smile. “we can go back.”

“no,” he says, grinning at you like you just gave him a podium. “next time we’re bringing one home.”

2021-2025 © jungwnies | All rights reserved. Do not repost, plagiarize, or translate

[rollingspicevee]

Do any of the beast's cookies have any kinks

MDNI!

Oh, absolutely! Here’s a few I’ve thought of them having

Shadow Milk:

• Edging and overstimulation. I feel those go hand in hand most of the time, but he definitely enjoys both

• I can see a bit of degradation? Mostly depends on his mood. If he’s in a jealous mood, like if he just took you back from an Ancient, especially Pure Vanilla Cookie, oh, he’s being degrading when he talks dirty to you. Angrily hissing in your ear like a snake throwing a fit, words like venom dripping from his fangs, even if it’s not necessarily your fault. It’s the insecurities-

• Oh, but if you’re a good lil mouse for him, he will offer praise and, if you’re lucky, gentle sex. Positive reinforcement! He wants you to keep behaving, after all~

• Roleplay! What, he’s an actor- you expected any less?

• He likes a little risk. He has more shame than Burning Spice, but not as much as Mystic Flour. He won’t fuck you in front of others unless he has a reason (such as to assert his claim over you in front of his minions or Truthless Recluse), but he likes the thought of fucking you around others, just out of sight. Perhaps behind the curtains before a show. Make sure to keep your voice down if you don’t wanna be caught~ He’ll have to punish whoever gets curious enough to check it out, after all~

• Biggest. Fucking. Tease. EVER! He is not above edging his darling in a semi public space and then denying you your orgasm for the sole purpose of enjoying himself as he watches you squirm, and no matter how much you ask, you’ll be teasingly denied until in a more private area. He could do it there if he wanted of course, but he loves the tension it creates and how much of a mess it leaves his darling lil mouse for him until you’re begging him to fuck you by the time you’re in private together. Be prepared to go all night, because he just can’t resist that adorable face you make when you beg~

• Bite him. I dare you.

Mystic Flour:

• I see her having a Mistress kink- I just do-

• Praise is not too uncommon with her. Though she may not be super vocal, she will tell you that you’re doing a good job and other words of praise every now and then. It’s so far off from her usual “everything is futile” and basically “just give up and give in” attitude that it almost gives you whiplash-

• I see sensory deprivation as one of her biggest kinks, so she often likes to blindfold her darling. Makes you much more reactive to her touch.

• I also see her liking a bit of bondage (she’s a rigger though, not a rope bunny, if there was any question). She especially likes to combine it with the sensory deprivation.

• Dommy mommy? Absolutely baiehchc

• Not a big risk taker, unlike the other two on this list. Nothing even remotely public. Ever. As for danger, she’s- iffy about it. She doesn’t mind a lil danger if you want that, but nothing major.

Burning Spice:

• Size kink. 100%. Have you seen that guy?! He’s HUGE! He towers over most, if not all, other cookies, including his fellow Beasts. He’s also built and strong. He loves how small his darling is in comparison to him, how snug you are in his arms, how tightly you squeeze his cock…

• Ngl, he’s probs the roughest of the five. He does occasionally have his gentle moments in the bedroom with you, but he’s rough more often than not and very rough on top of that

• Primal kink. He’s said before how much he loves the thrill of the chase! So be careful every time you decide to try and run from him. That’s when his predator instincts kick into high gear and, more likely than not, the thought of hunting you down will get his jam pumping in more ways than one. Good luck.

• He loves it when you fight him. When you’re feisty. When you’ve got a bit of bite to you. Just be careful not to rile him up too much if you wanna be able to move for the week.

• He’s been around a long time and can get bored very easily. He never gets bored of you, of course, but this does lead to some… interesting proposals from him. Unless it puts your life in danger, nothing is off the table for him to want to try at least once. That’s not to say he doesn’t like a little danger tho.

• Zero shame. Actually- negative shame. Will fuck you in front of the Spice Swarm if he’s in the mood for it.

I can’t really say much for Eternal Sugar or Silent Salt since we know so little about them so far. I can say I see Eternal Sugar enjoying somno tho-

All:

• Corruption Kink. That is all.

[applepixls]

etho upon learning pots can be smashed by flying into them: "wait............. minigame!!!"

its like that one childrens book "if you give a mouse a cookie" except its "if you give a redstoner a new game mechanic"

[peasack]

You know, I've been searching EVERYWHERE. for some teen!reader or just simply platonic!reader x thunderbolts but I cannot find them anywhere, so I've decided to take matter into my own hands.

Please excuse me for my poor writing, this is my first time writing headcanons and English is not my first language. Might come off a little cringe but overall just sappy, happy headcanons.

✦ Thunderbolts Nickname Headcanons for gn!Teen!Reader ✦

∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗

✦ Alexei – "Little Star"

Alexei caught you sneaking out to sit on the balcony one night after a rough mission. You were just staring at the stars in silence.

“You remind me of the stars,” he said gruffly.

You squinted at him. “Distant? Cold? Constantly exploding?”

He barked out a laugh. “No! Little but burning bright! And always there. Little Star. That is you now.”

You groaned but secretly loved it. He never dropped it after that.

He says it with pure affection every time, like he’s genuinely proud of you for just existing. Even when you’re sulking or pretending you don’t need him, he still calls you his “Little Star” with that warm, fatherly rumble.

✦ Bucky – "Kid"

It started as a throwaway line. “Watch your six, Kid,” he’d mumble on missions. But it stuck.

One day you snapped, “You know I have a name, right?”

He just smirked. “Yeah, but you’re my Kid now. Deal with it.”

When you’re having a rough time though, he softens it. “Hey, c’mon, Kid. I’ve got you.”

Simple yet caring and full of affection, just the classic protective dad nickname.

✦ Bob – "Starlight"

One night he found you sneaking onto the roof because you couldn’t sleep (again). You told him you like staring at the stars ‘cause it makes you feel small but safe.

“You’re kinda like that,” Bob shrugged. “A little starlight in a pretty messed up world.”

“That’s cheesy”, You said, a smile planted across your face.

“Yeah, but you’re smiling.”

After he saw your smile that day he never got rid of the name. You were his Starlight now, and no one could take that from him.

He mostly uses it when you’re anxious or sad. A soft reminder that even if you feel tiny and invisible, you matter to him.

✦ John – "Rookie"

John is the kinda guy who shows affection by pretending to be exasperated with you, right?

The first time you trained together, you stumbled over a move and he immediately went, “Careful, Rookie. You’ll get yourself knocked out like that.”

You rolled your eyes but didn’t argue. He’s called you “Rookie” ever since.

“I’ve literally been on, like, twenty missions now." You protested.

He shrugged, “Doesn’t matter. You’re still my Rookie.”

Playful, but there’s this protective edge to it.

He uses it when you mess up, when he’s teasing you, but also when he’s proud. Like if you pull something impressive, he’ll smirk and say, “That’s my Rookie.”

When you’re upset? A quiet: “Hey. C’mon, Rookie. You’re tougher than this.”

✦ Ava – "Ghostling"

You mastered sneaking up on people at the compound, sometimes even managing to scare her, which she refused to admit.

“You’re like a little ghost,” she muttered once.

You smirked. “Ghostling, maybe?”

She raised an eyebrow but accepted it. It became a secret thing just between the two of you.

She’ll mutter it quietly when she’s proud or when you need comfort.

When she’s teasing you: “C’mon, Ghostling. You’re losing your touch.”

When she’s serious: “I see you, Ghostling. You’re not invisible to me.”

Ava doesn’t give out nicknames lightly, but you cracked her shell, and now it’s her little way of showing affection.

✦ Yelena – "Mouse"

You tried to sneak a cookie off her plate once. Big mistake.

“You move like a tiny mouse,” she said, feigning annoyance but actually loving it.

"A mouse?", you question.

“You squeak. You sneak. You steal my snacks. Mouse.”

You were horrified but now it’s stuck.

Whenever you try to act tough: “Shhh, Mouse. Go squeak somewhere else.”

But when you’re sad: “Hey, Mouse. I’m here, yes? You can tell me.”

Pure teasing but it softens in quiet moments.

She acts like she uses it to rile you up, but it’s become something she says gently when you need her.

∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗∗ ࣪ ˖༺ ♡ ༻˖ ࣪ ∗

Hope you guys liked it! I'll turn on my requests in case anyone had the same problems as me and I'll try to fulfill your wishes! <3

[witherby]

Do you know about the cookie challenge on TikTok? If you do, can you write a small story about that? With batfam and littlest Wayne

I do know!

For those unaware: typically a mother, father, and their child sit together in front of three covered plates, but it can be any three people as long as the third is unaware of the game.

The father goes first and has one cookie. The child goes next and has two cookies. The mother goes last and has zero cookies. It's a test to see if the child will share one of their cookies with their parent to make it fair for everybody.

The Littlest Wayne: Cookies

Masterlist is Here!

"Mouse, d'you wanna play a game?"

You lift your head from your pile of colorful letter blocks and blink at your mama. Hal smiles sweetly down at you, holding several plates in one hand. They're covered, which means they're a mystery. You fucking love mysteries.

"Yah," you nod. Hal holds a hand out and you grab it, allowing him to help you to your feet. You toddle after him into the kitchen, where Dada's sitting at the counter. When Bruce sees you, he gives you a big grin and holds out his hands.

"Hi, Mouse," he greets. You run into his arms and chomp on his wrist. "Okay we talked about this. Ouch."

"Dada!!" You shout, uncaring of his pain and eager to share the good news as he sits you in a high chair between himself and Hal. "I p'ay game wif mama!!"

"I know," Bruce huffs, amused, "I'm gonna play, too."

"Oh. I win, okay?"

"I mean, this might be a game where nobody wins. Or everybody wins. Wouldn't that be nice?"

"No." Dada is stupid. Obviously winning is the best thing ever and you have to win always and forever.

Hal snorts and quickly covers his mouth, turning away from Bruce's flat glare.

"Anyway," your dad says, distributing the plates — one in front of himself, one in front of you, and one in front of Hal — "here's how we play the game. Hal is gonna — no don't peek yet, honey — Hal is — don't peek. You gotta play fair. — Hal is gonna — no peeking — .....Okay..... Hal is — oh my god, I said don't peek, English is your first language baby what are you doing — "

Hal flicks the napkin off of his plate before Bruce can give himself an aneurysm trying to stop you from touching your own. "I got a cookie, Mouse! Look!"

You ignore your own mystery plate as you hear the magic word, eyes snapping to Hal's priceless treasure. Your mouth immediately starts salivating.

"Mama," you chirp, pointing a finger at it in case he couldn't see the treat for some reason, "dat's a chocco chip cookie!"

"I know!" Hal says, gesturing to you. "Okay, your turn! You can move the napkin now."

"Are you gonna eats it?" You ask, completely ignoring what he said. You are laser-focused in on his treat. It's got more than five chocolate chips in it (you can only count to five), which means it's extra yummy delicious. You can't even believe it's still on the plate un-devoured right now. His willpower is insane.

"I...yeah, in a minute," Hal says. He's smiling like he's trying really hard not to laugh. "Mouse, what's on your plate?"

"I dunno," you say, pointing at the cookie on Hal's. Again, to ensure he's aware of the glorious object before him. "Is it soft cookie?"

"oh my god," Bruce whispers, defeated. Hal wheezes, then coughs to collect himself.

"I think so. Mouse, do you think there's a cookie on your plate?"

That finally gets you to lock back in. You take the napkin off of your plate and swear a heavenly choir starts singing. There's two cookies on your plate. Holy fucking shit. This is the greatest day of your life.

"I GOTS TWO COOKIES!" You shout victoriously, like the winner you are. You get your fist around one of your prizes and cram it in your mouth immediately. Hal has his head in his arms on the table and he's wheezing loudly. Probably sobbing because he doesn't have two cookies like you do. Because you won and you're a winner.

"Wow, that's great," Bruce praises, gently patting your back. "Let's see what I got."

He removes his napkin from his plate.

No cookies.

Dada pouts at you. "Aw. I didn't get any."

Indeed, he did not. Hal got one, and you got two. That's three total. Bruce got none.

Fuckin' loser. You point at his plate and giggle, which sends Hal over the edge. Literally. He slips off the edge of his chair and crumbles to the floor, laughing so hard his face is turning red like a cherry.

Bruce's bottom lip is wobbling. He's trying his best not to start laughing, too.

"Mousey," he admonishes, "it's not nice to laugh at those less fortunate."

Hal squeals on the floor. You start laughing, too, as you finish eating your first cookie. There's chocolate and crumbs all around your mouth and hand.

"I really wanted a cookie, too," Bruce continues, looking pointedly on your plate where your second cookie is resting. "If only someone were willing to share so that we could all have a cookie. Three cookies between three people means that we could all have one..."

You contemplate his logic. It's pretty sound. Dada is kinda smart sometimes. He can count above five, so that means he knows everything. Three cookies...between three people...

Like a puzzle piece sliding into place, you understand what he wants.

You reach over and grab Hal's abandoned cookie off his plate.

"Here!" You say proudly. Hal's barking laughter on the floor sounds inhuman as it grows higher in pitch. You think you hear him stammer out that he's gonna pee. You've already peed in your pull-up. You didn't know they made pull-ups for grown-ups.

Bruce ducks his head, shoulders shaking with repressed laughter. He reaches a trembling hand out and takes the offered, stolen cookie.

"W-wow, baby," he mutters, a broken man, "thanks."

You kick your feet and smile. You're such a good person. You see Alfred enter the kitchen, likely investigating the noises of the dying seal on the ground, and perk up.

"G'ampa!" You cry, picking up your second treasure. This is the greatest act of selflessness you could ever perform. "Do you wan' dis cookie?"

Bruce joins his boyfriend and collapses to the floor. Alfred hides a smirk behind his hand and clears his throat.

"My, how very polite of you, little Flittermouse," he says, holding his hand out. "Thank you for this generous gift. It means the world to me."

You grin, chocolate staining your teeth. You really might be the most altruistic person on the planet.

"You welcome!"

[rollingeevee]

What does Eevee see attracting the Beast Bites AU Beasts the most?

I had this idea sitting in my head for a bit and decided to finally make it! As stated before, a cookie has to catch a Beast’s attention first and then hold that attention as the Beast continues to observe them as well as pass all their “challenges” that they set in place to test a potential darling. But what traits grab a Beast’s attention enough for them to scope out a cookie as a potential darling? Let’s get into it, shall we~?

Shadow Milk I see finding intelligence as his most desired trait for his darling. The way you question the world around you, the way you verify facts for yourself, the way you never take his words at face value. Ah~! What a smart lil mouse you are~! A challenge~ That’s just what he likes~

The Beast of Deceit’s tests primarily consist of seeing how you deal with the lies he spreads. How eager are you to figure things out for yourself? Yes, he eventually wants his darling to drown in Deceit with him, but if you fell for his tricks so easily, you wouldn’t be as fun~! He also likes to test your cleverness and wits. How sharp tongued are you? How well do you respond to witty banter? Hopefully in kind~ He loves a good game~

Once Shadow Milk Cookie has come to the conclusion that, yes~! You are exactly what he’s looking for in a darling~! he wastes no time. He draws you in, isolates you, and corners you. Likely kicking and screaming, he drags you into the shadows, placing a swift bite whilst you’re still in a panic. All mine now, lil mousey dear~

Mystic Flour finds herself drawn to cookies who are determined, independent and hard working. She granted wishes constantly when she was still viewed as a great hero, it was all cookies ever came to see her for. They would stand in line for days to ask something of her, and again, and again, and she grew oh so tired of it. So seeing a cookie who is determined to work hard for everything they want, rather than taking short cuts? It interests her, to say the least.

The Beast of Apathy’s tests primarily test one’s determination. How far are you willing to go to get what you desire. How hard are you willing to work? If she offers you an easy way out, will you take it? This also plays out in her favor as she is the least affectionate of the Beasts. She is also comfortable with her darling being able to rely on themselves. She’s also fine with a cookie she’s scoping out working smarter, not harder. It’s the lack of lazy shortcuts that she cares for.

Mystic Flour Cookie’s final test is offering you a wish. She will grant you anything you desire, one thing you do not have to work for. You’re unfortunately stuck either way. If you say yes, she will likely become upset at overestimating you and reduce you to flour, even though she offered. But if you say no, that’s when she takes you, deep into the depths of the Ivory Pagoda. Hers at last, little rabbit…

Burning Spice loves ferocity! The fiercer, the better! He himself has stated that he likes his prey to have a little fight in them. And that’s just what you are. His prey.

The easiest way to catch Burning Spice Cookie’s attention is to stand up to him. Face him head on! Tell him off! Whether you’re afraid or not, having the courage to stand before him without backing down is something he finds impressive. He’ll be a bit taken aback by your boldness, but in a delighted way. Ah, yes~! Feisty~! Just what he’s looking for~! That is the moment you turn from opponent to prey.

It’s after that that the Great Destroyer starts watching you. Testing you. He observes his prey, desiring to see how they rise to the challenges he presents them. Even if you’re not physically strong, if you make up for it with stubbornness and courage, that works just as well. And when you stand your ground once more when he finally appears before you again, he gives you the biggest smirk before taking you down and pulling you away, back to his temple, where he quickly places his claim on you through his bite, all the while you’re screaming obscenities at him. Ah, there’s that fire he adores~ He knew he picked right~ And now he’s sealed the deal… You’re not going anywhere, little kitten~

Eternal Sugar would love a darling who’s gentle and compliant. Someone who loves lounging around and sleeping, just like her, but who also is happy to serve their lover. A homebody. Housewife/househusband material. Someone who enjoys to cook and clean. She’s not necessarily messy or anything, but she is… well, slothful.

The Beast of Sloth, unlike her comrades, doesn’t really do tests. She primarily just observes. The occasional “test” she does is seeing how a potential darling might take care of gifts she leaves them. Do you treasure them? Make sure they’re well taken care of?

Once Eternal Sugar Cookie’s interest is solidified, she’ll swoop down from her clouds and snatch you up. Oh, no need to be scared! She’s not gonna hurt you! Come~ Partake in some sweets~ Rest with her~ Relax and enjoy yourself~ Once your guard is let down and you’re asleep, the claim is placed. So why don’t you just stay forever, darling lamb~

Silent Salt I can see liking someone who is tender and reserved. They are a knight, and the position of knight is one meant to serve and protect. I can see them desiring a kind darling with little strength. Someone they can protect. Someone to adore and dote on them in thanks for their diligent protection. Having someone helpless for a darling also forces them to rely on their Beast for safety, and makes it less likely that they’ll run.

Perhaps the way you first catch the Beast of Silence’s attention is when they see you sitting by yourself, quietly reading with a look of wonder on your face. A fantasy story of monsters, royalty, and courageous knights. You look so peaceful in your serene quiet, and that draws them in.

Silent Salt Cookie’s tests likely mostly consist of testing your reactions to danger. Do you run or freeze? Cling to your allies for protection? Or do you fight them off on your own? They tend to lose interest if they find you possess a hidden strength. But if you continue to act helpless and rely on others, they do something most of the others don’t think to. They swoop in to become your savior. Through this, they form a sorta bond with you, which allows them to more easily lure you into their embrace. You realize too late that you’re trapped. But no need to fret. Your darling knight will keep you safe, sweet dove…

[merakiui]

The twins who are addicted to eating you out.

At first it was all fun and games but then it became excessive. walking by an empty classroom? Hands shoot out and drag you in for a session. Walking alone in the halls? Your caught and dragged into a supply closet and your clit is tortured. Exercising in the pool? A merman is suddenly there pulling the swimsuit aside and digging in. Closing in the monstro lounge? Pulled behind a counter to get your cunt licked.

Jade would have the audacity to thank you for the meal, while Floyd wouldn't even bother to clean his face off afterwards. You become so paranoid always looking over your shoulder, avoiding being alone, locking your door (Because you have woken up to Jade having invited himself in for "breakfast".) Because without fail the moment your alone with them they go straight for your pussy.

T_T greedy eels,,, this is basically like that one book if you give a mouse a cookie, only it's eels and you let them indulge in your pussy once and that's it; they're hooked for life.

But omg!!!! They're absolute menaces! You can't go a day without them diving right for your pussy. But they can't help it. :< you get wet so easily, and they just love how you taste and smell. It really is like a meal to them,,, Floyd loves it when you squirt on his face and will insist you sit on him so he can spend his sweet time lapping at your slick folds. It's even worse if you're in the water with them because they don't have to break for air, so they can spend as much time as they want torturing your poor, overstimulated pussy and clit. >_<

Sometimes they don't even put their fingers or dicks in. It's just an absurdly long eel tongue bullying its way into your velvety walls. OTL you hate them (not really) because they always ruin your panties!!!! You want to be able to go one day without those two ripping them off you to get to your bare pussy or you soaking through them. Just thinking about those eels and their malicious grins is enough to get you unconsciously wet... they're a bad influence on your pussy!!!!

You can't even fight them because most of the time they know when to show up at the perfect moment. Like if you're super horny or if you've had a bad day and just need to fuck all the stress away. How can you say no (you can't) because most times they don't give you much of a choice.

[quarterlifekitty]

Hi hi! Hope you're having a good day! Just wanted to say I've been obsessed with scent kink Soap, like nonstop on my brain.

Soon I figured I'd share my thoughts. Nasty gross Soap who finds himself parting your thighs to take a whiff- he promises he won't get rough! Just a smell he says but then we all know he can't just smell...

If your life depended on it, would you rather trust a dog not to eat a sausage that was placed in front of it, or trust Soap not to eat a pussy that was placed in front of him?

Soap’s fucking ‘if you give a mouse a cookie’ ass.

cw: dubcon just to be cautious. Also scent kink but honestly I assume if you follow me that you’re here for that.

When you’re chilling in bed, he will grab your thighs and drag you to the edge so he can visit his favorite girl. The first few times you thought it was the under-the-bed monster that was about to take your ass to the goblin kingdom.

It’s probably how your relationship started. For one reason or another— maybe the weather had turned, or you’d had to catch a train— you both landed back at your place, sweating and heaving. His eyes darting between your legs. And suddenly he’s begging, beseeching— “bonnie, ah’ve jus’ gotta know—“

It starts with you perched on the couch, a little weirded out but wanting to see where this freak is going with all this. It’s the weirdest come on of your life. You spread your legs but that’s not enough— he grabs your ankles and hikes them up so they’re nearly behind you, and he dives.

It literally sounds like he’s snuffling for truffles down there.

“Cannae get a proper whiff like this—“ you barely catch him saying before you bottoms are yanked down and it’s just your panties in the way, slightly damp from sweat.

He digs his nose in so deep that it pushes the gusset of your panties between your folds. He can’t stop himself— he lathes his tongue against the fabric. He’s like a fucking bloodhound. He can see you clench just a little from what he’s doing, and that’s all the permission he needs to pull those panties aside and start smelling it from the source.

It ends with your panties torn, and his stubble shining with your slick before he’s barely able to pull himself together enough to carry you to bed.

[imaginariumwanderer]

Mkay last post before logging off. Featuring silly pixel art I made w/ my mouse.

This chart was actually made out of pure self-indulgent a while back with no intention of being posted, I ended up scribbling(?) all over the thing. Hopefully it's readable when zoomed in.

It's "my ship in 5 minutes" but I can make it 30 if you want. WARNING: Tons of sappy yapping+pixel art download under cut.

About "tropes": The trope is called Angel-Devil shipping, oh but I don't think PV is an angel. He's more like a God for SM (at least that's my preference)… Thinking at all the possible tropes that suits them make me really wonder why some people consider Shadowvanilla a crack/pro ship. Enemies to lovers or villain/hero ships have been pretty archetypal since the day of olds. Compared to all the ships I've encountered in the past… Shadowvanilla is more or less the "slightly out of the norm" on the "problematic ships scale" <- typing this out make me feel like an old fandom veteran haha

About "how it happens": I have no idea where to put PV on that chart. He's the one who approached first, but not out of romantic intents, him falling for SM is as unexpected as can be. SM fell first and slowly, and in 'slow' I meant decades upon decades. It's inevitable, painfully so, spending all those years watching over this cookie who's so perfect in his imperfections, how could one not feel something? Of course it's not so simple, that 'something' is a horrid mixture of disgust, envy, hatred, understanding, both the need to preserve and destroy… And maybeee the tiniest crumb of affection? SM realized something around the first couple hundredth years mark, he then spends the next thousands in denial of it. No matter. Whether it's PV or the Soul jam, his birth-given rights. SM knows what he wants and he WILL get what he wants. (He's wrong on both fronts. And somewhere in the back of his mind, SM knows that. But he'll never admit it. He'll never ever admit anything. Until it's too late. In a way, the same goes for PV)

About a certain someone who's not clingy, but would die for attention: I think PV gets lonely easily. As he's hyper-aware of himself and considerate of others, appearing clingy is the last thing PV wants. So PV would put extra efforts in taking care of those around him, be it cookies, animals or the greenery in his garden. A healer is always busy, always helpful. If he's always needed by others then he would never be afraid of being alone. Ironically enough, this ended up making PV come off as a little overbearing. As of late, the only ones able to see through the facade are Hollyberry cookie and you-know-who.

Other scattered thoughts: These two are completely different yet can't be more similar, on the various sliding scales they're either stuck to one another or are flung to both ends. On another note, honestly I can't see these two doing anything domestic together, the most I can see is cooking, which is basically the same as magic in the cookie world. Anyways, are they in "love"? Are they dating? Not really, no. It's more of a a parasitic-turned-symbiotic-soulbond, a will-they-won't-they-destroy-the-world situationship (iykyk) I do enjoy relationships that's hard to put into words. Their feelings are somehow romantic, somewhat deranged and something much, much deeper.

My desire to ship these two comes from the desire to see them grow beyound their archetypes. Being with PV does give SM the chance to be horrible as can be, yeah, but I'd like to think SM does have a personality outside of being a villainous tormentor. He spends so long observing others, and now for the first time he's being seen. Now SM have met someone who can see right through him, who can glimpse into those dammed vulnerabilities of his. Being with SM does let us see PV in his darkest moments, but it's at the same time the moments where PV can shine the most, to prove SM that his ideals isn't naïveté or simple platitudes. In canon, SM+PV works well as enemies, but it is the many contradictions born when romance is added into the mix that got me shipping. They simultaneously break down and bolster one another's greatest traits. Like binary stars, they orbit around the other, so close yet so far apart, lest they collide. They could've been so perfect for each other. But not in this life, or the next, or the next...

Pixel art time! I have way too much fun w/ Smilk's many faces, his and PV's combined came to around 22 expressions. These are quick to made due to their small size (25x25 px). Zip file includes both the og and 75x75 sizes. I don't mind if any Vanilla milkshakers might use these, just please remember to read the my art terms and conditions first! (which can be found in my About)

Some disclaimer: some images may have different names. This is the first time I'm using Getuploader so sorry if something broke.

Link