#the switch from Neil to Nathaniel?

[aelinsattitude]

I would kill a man to be able to read all the iconic Aftg lines again for the first time.

[jeanmoreaue]

the fact that nora made Jean gentle at heart is so special to me. despite everything that’s happened to him and although he’s a bit abrasive, he still cleans the damn dishes and puts away leftovers without being asked i love him so much

[ninyard]

the real tragedy of an aftg live action adaptation would be how they wouldn’t be able properly show the Neil/Nathaniel switch in TKM as it is on paper

[i-am-trying-my-best-okay]

"Patiently" awaiting for when Jean's narration switches from referring to himself as 'Jean' to 'Jean-Yves'

[song-tam]

.anyway

I HATE AFTG SO MUCH (bawling my eyes out)

[waestlandbaby]

The way Neil Josten switched into Nathaniel in order to process and handle the abuse and trauma of being found by his father's people and the reality of his looming death will never not fuck me up, he literally said I can't handle this but maybe the Butcher's son could. And then. And then!! The way those two versions of himself coalesce into Neil Abram Josten (legally recognised) after Nathan is dead and the truth is out? The Neil Josten we see in The Sunshine Court has all of the attachments of Neil Josten, the slow unraveling of family and care but all of the hard edges of Nathaniel, unflinching from the reality of the world he lives in and the decisions he has to make to keep his life. Nathaniel would never have stuck around long enough to care about Jean Moreau and call a hit out on his abuser. Neil would never have trusted those resources available to him (or potentially the trail it could leave) in order to deal with the problem in one brutal but efficient move. But Neil Abram Josten reforged could, would and did.

[atlalasassy]

The switch between Neil to Nathaniel and then back again in The King’s Men is fucking genius but can we talk about the switch from Nathaniel to Neil in The Sunshine Court - it actually changed my life

[stardustcasti]

Thinking about

Kevin's thought about:

Neil, the obssed freak that he is. Like what did he think of him in the begining? And now? After he hecame the exy player that he is and changed the setting of...the world basically.

Andreil, what Kevin REALLY thinks of them. I don't accepct him not caring about (ANYTHING, honestly, this fake idgafer) them.

Jeremy- From the no. 1 Jeremy Knox fanboy

Jean- The guilt, the love, the complicated emotions he never quite figuerd out. EVERYTHING

Jerejean cuz

Andrew. His protector, all the waisted potential he sees in him. His PARTNER after he left the Nest.

Fucking Whymack (Will he call him dad? Coach? Will we have a dramatic switch like the famous Neil-Nathaniel incident)

Dan? Maybe? Yes? Like her as a captian

Oh, and Seth

I think its unnecessary to mention his relationship with Riko. Not that I'd read many fanfics yet (I read like 1 lol) but I trust Nora THE MOST to describe their relationship. She knows it the best and I ADORE her writing so 🫡. I can't imagine tbh bc I feel these two never quite clicked to me as much as they could buttt Nora I'll be waiting 10 years and more.

[otdiaftg]

The King's Men - Chapter Fourteen

Day: Saturday, March 9th / 10th* Time: 3:48 PM EST

"So the attitude problem wasn't an act, at least," Andrew says. "I was going to tell you," Nathaniel says. "Stop lying to me." "I'm not lying. I would have told you last night, but they were in our locker room." "They who?" Browning asks. Nathaniel switches to German without missing a beat. He is pretty sure he earns a dirty look from Browning for that trick, but he won't take his eyes off Andrew to look. "Those weren't security guards that came for us. They were there for me, and they would have hurt all of you to get me out of there. I thought by keeping my mouth shut I could keep you safe." Nathaniel still has his hands up by Andrew's face, so he lightly taps a thumb against the bruise at Andrew's eye. "I didn't know they'd staged a riot." "What did I tell you about playing the martyr card?" Andrew asks. "You said no one wanted it," Nathaniel says. "You didn't tell me to stop." "It was implied." "I'm stupid, remember? I need things spelled out." "Shut up." "Am I at ninety-four yet?" "You are at one hundred," Andrew says. "What happened to your face?" Nathaniel swallows hard against a rush of nausea. "A dashboard lighter." He winces at the awful sound Nicky makes. The groan of a quickly- shifting mattress almost swallows up Aaron's ragged curse. Nathaniel looks back without thinking, needing to see who is on the move, and see's Aaron has rolled off the bed to go stand with Nicky. Turning means the others get a look at his burned cheek. Kevin recoils so hard he slams into the wall behind him. He claps a protective hand over his own tattoo and Nathaniel knows he is imagining Riko's reaction to this atrocity. This time it is Dan stopping Matt from getting up, her knuckles white against his dark shirt and her head turned away. Matt starts to fight free but settles for a hoarse, "Jesus, Neil. The fuck did they do to you?"

Art used with permission by Midgart. Thank you @midgart!

*Due to the Leap Year, I have opted to highlight the day rather than the date to keep the events in occurrence to the 2007 year. I will continue to mark both days accordingly.

[kloudiuar]

The Sunshine Court

The switch from Nathaniel to Neil from Jean's perspective in the new book had me screaming and throwing up NGL :(

[beaulesbian]

The Sunshine Court spoilers

I love this small parallel where the characters name changes depending how the person's point of view see and acknowledges that person:

All for the game - the king's men: with neil himself after everything he went through, where whole chapters we saw neil not as neil, like a shadow of what he was with the foxes, and then even the text switches back, when he's finally allowed to stay and be neil

Vs

The sunshine court, where jean knew nathaniel from before and kept thinking about him this way, until that foxes last game against the ravens (and all that followed after, with neil confirming him the news about riko), he's finally able to let go of that part of their past and call him neil.

[fd5800]

Can we talk about the switch from Nathaniel to Neil. Please. On my hands and knees thinking about the significance. Especially with the backdrop of aftg where Neil switched his own name. Please.

[mania-sama]

Same anon here, I'm glad you loved TGR so far! I definitely enjoyed it way more than TSC

I'd love to know more of your opinions on the series but I don't wanna bombard you with tons of questions, so i'll just stick to one xD

Who are your top 3 fav AFTG characters? Up to you if you want to explain or talk more about each of them :3

You can bombard me if you want to. I love to talk and share my opinions on things like it's a serious debate on national television lmao.

Yes I'll tell you my top 3 and YES I will talk about them in depth. In this order:

Kevin Day - KEVIN FUCKING DAY. I think my biggest draw to him is the complexity in his character/personality. When we're introduced to him, through Neil's eyes, we see a hardass, daunting, almost unattainable figure. He's telling Neil that he's terrible at the game, but in the same breath, telling Neil that he's going to join, with no room for debate. Their exact dialogue is this:

"I won't play with Kevin." "You will," Kevin said." Wymack shrugged at Neil. "Maybe you haven't noticed, but we're not leaving here until you say yes. Kevin says we have to have you, and he's right." "We should have thrown away your coach's letter the second we opened it," Kevin said. "Your file is deplorable and I don't want someone with your inexperience on our court. It goes against everything we're trying to do with the Foxes this year. Fortunately for you, your coach knew better than to send you in action instead. You play like you have everything to lose." [...] "That's why," Neil said quietly. "That's the only kind of striker worth playing with."

All the while, Neil is having a panic attack because he's under the assumption that this absolute celebrity is going to recognize and expose him for being Nathaniel. Neil is terrified, and Kevin's dialogue and actions reinforce and justify his fear that he is someone who can screw over Neil's life in a variety of ways, Nathaniel being just one of them. Already, he grabbed my attention, but I think the best part of his character is the fact that he is scared.

We don't notice it immediately, but he is a man who is constantly living from one mental breakdown to the next. He's just really good at not showing it (and drowning it out with alcohol). It's shown right at the beginning, though we would not yet know what it meant until much later in the books. Kevin always travels and pairs with Andrew. It's not because they are in love with each other; it's because Kevin literally cannot be alone, or he will actually lose his mind. He is petrified of Riko, and it's an absolute testament to his strength and willingness to change that, in book 3, he steps onto the court and gives a display of power (switching his racket to his mangled hand) on the day that they play against the Ravens. He claims that "being straight" is easier than being gay, clearly scared to be someone more than what the media expects him to be.

But that's what's cool about him. He's a celebrity who knows how to act like it, and his vulnerability comes in rare, shooting bursts that wreck him down to his soul. And then, throughout the series, he shows the most character growth, second only to Neil Josten himself. He grows into someone who can share his pain with his teammates, into someone who can ask for help and tell people that he cares about them. HE CHANGED HIS TATTOO. HE CHANGED HIS TATTOO. It's not that his scars aren't there or that his fear has subsided; it's that he can work in spite of them. He is brave. Very, very brave.

He is truly what it means to be "all for the game". He's sacrificed everything to keep playing. He kept playing even when he wasn't supposed to anymore because of his hand. He kept playing in the face of Riko's wrath. He kept playing because he loves the game, not because of any specific trauma or duty to someone else. Even though he was technically forced to play, he just. Loves the game and wants to keep playing until the day he dies. This love also comes out in the way he coaches the team with his father, the way he takes Neil to the court every night. He wants to get better, but he's not a solo player. He is selfish and prideful, but his selfishness and pride are not harmful. He's careful in all the ways that he's not, and he's obsessive and loud in all the ways that he's limited and quiet.

I could honestly keep going, but I think I'll stop here. Needless to say, I am VERY. VERY excited about his new duology. I love him. Kevin "let Riko be the king" Day, you will always be special to me.

2. Neil Josten - What is there not to like about him?, is the real question. We all read the same book series. We all know what this brat has to offer and why any given person may like him. I almost feel like I don't need to say anything, but alas, here goes a very simplified answer:

I love a character who shoots off at the mouth. I am a very honest person myself, mainly because I never find an occasion to lie. At most, I'll obscure a truth, and that's about it. For Neil, it's in his very nature to lie and obscure and cover his tracks in the mud with leaves and sticks. But when he is honest, it's pretty much always at the expense of someone else. My favorite, FAVORITE quote in the series is from Neil. Yes, you know the one. He tells Riko that he and Kevin talk about his intricate and endless daddy issues all the time:

"You know, I get it," Neil said. "Being raised as a superstar must be really, really difficult for you. Always a commodity, never a human being, not a single person in your family thinking you're worth a damn off the court--yeah, sounds rough. Kevin and I talk about your intricate and endless daddy issues all the time." "Neil," Kevin said, low and frantic. Neil ignored him. "I know it’s not entirely your fault that you are mentally unbalanced and infected with these delusions of grandeur, and I know you’re physically incapable of holding a decent conversation with anyone like every other normal human being can, but I don’t think any of us should have to put up with this much of your bullshit. Pity only gets you so many concessions, and you used yours up about six insults ago. So please, please, just shut the fuck up and leave us alone.”

What a crazy thing to say, Neil.

The really good part about this character trait, though, is that it's not just "quirky"; it lands him and others in a lot of trouble. People get hurt and killed because he cannot shut his trap. But he can't stop, because it becomes to integral to him and his personality. He can't tell the truth about himself? Okay, he'll tell the truth about everyone else. And yes, this causes a lot of trouble and a lot of issues, but it's got the flip side where his yapping does a whole lot of good. This can be most clearly seen in Kevin.

If it weren't for Neil, Kevin would not have stood up to Riko. That's what I love both about the previous passage from The Raven King, and then the Kathy Show scene from The Foxhole Court. In that scene, there are three major things going on: Neil shooting off to defend Kevin (however unwanted it was), Kevin having a literal panic attack at both Riko being in front of him and Neil insulting Riko in a way that he knows there will be dire consequences, and Riko fuming because he is being insulted heavily and personally on live television. The result of this scene is Seth's murder.

But.

This is the first moment that Kevin realized that Riko is just a guy. He can be insulted and mocked just like anyone else. And then, Neil does it again. And again. And he keeps doing it, and it rubs off on every single person on the team, most of all Kevin. Kevin lifted his head and looked Riko in the eye because Neil called Riko useless and a commodity. Neil cares so much about the team and everyone around him, despite trying so hard not to, and he does everything in his power to protect them, that Kevin now feels that he's able to tell Wymack that he's his son and that he loves him.

Neil cares because it's in his very bone marrow to care. He lies and steals and runs, but what ties him down is not just the game, but the family he's made with the Foxes. Neil is "all for the game", because he associates the Foxes with Exy. Without the Foxes, there isn't Exy. That's why he ran from Edgar Allan. Hell, that's why he went to Edgar Allan, to protect Andrew from Neil's earlier actions (that being the... "intricate and endless daddy issues"....). He sacrifices everything for the game and the people around him that it brings the team together and makes them stronger.

His growth in the series is almost unmatched. And that's what I like in a character the most; one who can change and grow and be different by the end of the story. Neil does that. He's unrecognizable by the end. Not to mention all of the identity crises over Nathaniel and his father, the suffering he's endured, and how he uses it to become a better version of himself. I also love the symbolism of running and the inextricable ties it has with his character. I'm not going to get into it, but running scenes are some of my favorites in the entire world across all media, so. Obviously, I like Neil a lot because of that.

3. Jean Moreau - I liked him from the moment he was introduced, though I really started to love him during Neil's time in the Nest. Again, it's a result of his complexity that I've come to really enjoy his character. His first and general claim of his friendship with Neil is that they were "meant to be". They were meant to be partners because Raven bullshit idk, and Jean takes that and runs with it.

The reality is that Jean just wanted a friend. He had been alone and miserable for so long since Kevin left that he pretty much leaped at the opportunity to speak to someone in his native language. Despite everything, he was very quick to have someone stand in Kevin's place. Neil was that person. He will never admit it, though, either at fault of his conditioning or that he genuinely believes that he and Neil weren't friends (and therefor doesn't understand why he was so quick to take falls for Neil).

His entire being is shrouded and covered in a thick overlay of the trauma he's endured. He can be summed up very nicely with his own quote that he says to himself over and over again:

My name is Jean Moreau. My place is at Evermore. I belong to the Moriyamas. I will endure.

He has spent years convincing himself of his reality in order to survive. His thought process was clear to me from the moment Neil stepped foot onto Edgar Allan's campus. Survival is one of my favorite things to write and consume, mainly because it can be interpreted and shown in a variety of ways. Survival by "manipulation of self perception" is what's demonstrated through Jean's character. He survives because he gives himself up. He locks his love, thoughts, and emotions behind an eightfold fence and doesn't let anyone through.

He doesn't let anyone through because in the times that he has, he has been beaten and betrayed and burned. I have enjoyed immensely seeing the way that he interacts and swallows his ongoing and perpetual trauma. Abuse isn't easy. Abuse isn't easy if it's been happening for a day or if it's been happening you're entire life. He takes it all in and bears it on his skin and heart, and he doesn't let anyone see that he just wants to see a rainbow in the sky, feel the wind on his face, or have a genuine friend or two.

I was very excited when Sokavic announced Jean's trilogy. I had already written a fanfic one-shot detailing a nightmare and how Jean may be recuperating with the Trojans. I've imagined and loved his recovery from before it was even written. What makes this recovery the most complex is that he is both suicidal and convinced that he needs to live (in order to serve). Wanting to die, having to live; wanting to be free, having to stay caged. There is only one way to endure that, and that is to convince yourself you are meant to endure it.

As long as he plays Exy, Jean will not be happy. Interestingly, I don't think we've seen Jean actually. You know. Enjoy playing Exy, except when he was young. In a perfect, happy world, Jean will quit Exy after college and go on to do something nice in the quiet countryside with a golden retriever and Jeremy Knox at his side. But this is All For The Game, and Jean is owned by the mafia. I don't want to see him become happy with Exy, but I would like to see him become happy with all that surrounds it; Jeremy, Cat, Laila; ice cream, open roads, wind, and adrenaline; Kevin, Neil, and the ones who don't want to leave him behind.

I read fanfiction that contains traumatic events in order to read about the recovery. I like the aftermath and growth better than I like the event itself. I want to see Jean claw his way up until he finally realizes he can grab someone's hand. I want him to let go and realize that hands are already holding him and dragging him out of the grave he's been tossed in. I want to see Jean play Exy and go home to a family who makes him smile. I want to see him recover and realize that he can take medicine, doesn't have to listen to authority all of the time, and do things that make him personally happy. I want to see him recover.

That is why I like Jean. I like all that he has to offer in terms of a narrative not about running and learning how to stay, but learning how to find contentment and love even when you don't feel like you deserve it.

thank you for letting me ramble i love AFTG and I really need to read TGR lmao

[corner-collects-rocks]

aftg animatic of come by adrianne lenker

it starts out with/ neil as an adult/his time with the foxes post baltimore. as the “tuning” ends it shows neil playing exy (young or a fox take ur pick) and then the first time the guitar cuts out it switches to him after he buried mary.

then as the song begins we start to see him running and changing identities (w/ or w/o mary up to u) then as the words start we see glimpses of neils time with the foxes. summer before the rest of the foxes arrive. getting to know dan’s group, going to columbia and as the video progresses it becomes more and more apparent that these are memories and we’re in the car going to baltimore. reality breaks through as lola busts out the cigarette light. we start to switch back and forth between memory and reality as each injury is inflicted. (my vote for reality to seep in is for “i’m not cold, i’m not cold” or the following line “take my hand, take ahold” or if u want to start it earlier i would also like to pitch “take my left with your right”)

when she sings “Take my life, into your life” it transitions from nathan entering the basement to halloween when all the foxes are together (or the foxes winning their first match, just anytime the foxes are all one group) when it says “take a branch with your knife” it transitions from exy back to baltimore until we hear the final line “help me die, my daughter” to which we return to nathan as stuart arrives, nathan and nathaniel making eye contact as the gun goes off. (roll the credits as the song fades out)

i cannot draw. this has been banging around in my head. the most perfect song ever and blorbo mr. neil josten. please someone feel inspired and make something beautiful (and tag me in it so i can see please!!!)

[cafajeske]

you guys dont understand how my brain melted when jean made the switch from nathaniel to neil like OH MY GOD i dont see anybody commenting on that come on

[jamiesshelves]

Parts of TSC I can't stop thinking about (after my first read)

Jean having a few minutes before Riko got to him and using it to text Renee a warning. NOT asking her to help him. But warning her. Probably to protect Kevin and Neil more than himself.

Jean viewing himself as a captive with Wymack and Abby

Jean calling Neil Nathaniel until that sudden switch (just like when Neil thought of himself as Nathaniel)

Jean being the same age as Neil, so one of the youngest characters we know

Jean worshipping Thea and her calling him Paris

Jean throwing out Andrew's candy

Jean roasting Aaron for being unimportant even with a murder investigation going on

Renee giving Jean forehead kisses

"Right person, wrong time"

Jean taking Renee's picture and it being the only picture he has

The way the world perceives Riko as a martyr after his death

The way the world brushes aside that he almost killed Neil on live TV

"The only one close enough was andrew"

Jean reaching towards the TV as if he could save Neil and wanting him and Andrew to run

Jeremy being brunette through the events of TFC

The Trojans being okay with their plan for the foxes game because they knew they'd lose to the ravens eventually anyway

Jeremy living at home and having an estranged family situation

Jeremy having a butler he loves and trusts more than his family

BarkBark

Jean's promise to Kevin

Jean calling Kevin a "beautiful boy"

Both Jean and Jeremy trusting Kevin whole heartedly

Kevin giving truths about the nest to Jeremy

Kevin admitting to sticking to Andrew like glue because he didn't know how to be by himself after the nest

The coaches concern as they realize the way raven coaches treated Jean

The rumors about Jean and that Neil never thought of them

Jean being confirmed a bi king and simping over everyone except canon beautiful Neil

Jean probably not simping after Neil because he's the partner that could've been, aka a brother/safe space he never got

Jean not realizing why top surgery scars, and his abuse scars, would be seen differently

Jean not understanding why Trojans can pick their own clothes, food, majors, etc

Andrew letting Neil go to the FBI in California without him because he trusts his runaway to come back

Neil's immediate response to hearing about Greyson is hiring a hitman

Neil sassing the FBI

"I guess Drake wasn't a biter"

Neil telling Jean he can lock his door if it makes him feel safe but he doesn't have to worry anymore

Cat wanting to teach Jean to ride a motorcycle

"Kevin has earned the right to be"

Jean being afraid to ever teach anyone French again

Jeremy hiding from the police

Elodie

"That's putting it mildly." WHAT THE FUCK STUART.

Jean's list.

Jean still texting Renee

The reason the Trojans stay so positive

"I'm not safe with you anymore"

The parallels between Jean and Neil

Jean thinking he never got anything he didn't deserve

Jean only having a carry on bag like Neil

Wymack giving Jean money and his note

The Trojans giving Jean forehead kisses

Jeremy being into Jean but wanting to allow Jean to be able to heal first

Honestly more but this is enough for now lol