#this is angst

[haydenbadartist]

Let me name the stars for you 🌟

When I read this poem I instantly thought of them

[damiansgoodgirll]

Can you please write about reader dating drew and she was a wrestler in the past but she had to quit because something happened like she lost someone from her family or she lost a kid or she had a miscarriage…like something really bad happened and she felt so sad that she had to leave wrestling and one night during RAW cm punk uses that tragedy against drew and so drew attacked him and reader takes care of drew backstage please ❤️❤️❤️

drew mcintyre x reader

‼️this is ANGST, depression and miscarriage, blood, crying, cm punk being a dick (sorry ily), mention of nightmares and panic attacks, DON’T READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE PLEASE‼️

against the world

you were a good wrestler.

you started wrestling when you were a teen, wanting to make that passion your future job.

you were a magnificent wrestler. one of the best in the female faction.

you had been a divas champion for two years straight right after your debut, shocking everyone, shocking yourself too. you had won more matches than the ones you lost. you had been tag team champion multiple times. and, after the divas title was dismissed, you had been both smackdown and raw champion.

you were a beast.

everyone loved you. your colleagues, your family, your friends, your boss, your fans.

everyone saw the talent you had.

drew in particular.

you remember being paired up with him for a mixed tag team match and you immediately clicked. there was something in him that attracted you and there was this light in you that made him feel attracted by you.

it didn’t take long before he asked you on a date. one date became multiple dates, multiple dates became with you two officially dating and ended up with you two getting married and living together.

you were living a dream.

and when you found out that you were pregnant you were the happiest person in the world. you’ve always wanted to be a mom, you’ve always dreamed about a little baby running around the house.

so, when you announced that you would have leave for some time, you made a promise to the public and to the fans - i’ll be back stronger than ever.

but you couldn’t keep that promise.

you remember being seven months pregnant, everything was going fine. your baby boy - you found out it was a boy because drew couldn’t wait until the ninth month - was healthy and growing fast in your belly.

so you couldn’t really explain why one night you woke up and felt wet beneath your back. you remember calling for drew and when he turned on the light you saw the blood laying on the bed. you were trying not to panic but when you felt a strong pain in your belly, you felt something was definitely wrong.

drew went in alarm mode. you remember him picking you up and gently laying you in the backseat of his car while he kept whispering comforting words to you, trying to distract you from the pain. you remember him taking you to the hospital and screaming for a doctor while you laid half unconscious in his arms due to the amount of blood you lost.

but you will always remember waking up the next morning with drew by your side, his eyes red and puffy from crying, and you couldn’t really understand why until you felt it.

there was nothing in your belly. you felt no movements at all, you felt no pressure at all, just nothing at all. and when your eyes met his, you immediately understood.

you remember when drew immediately stood up and went to hug you when you started screaming for your baby. drew didn’t know what to do because there wasn’t much he could have done. he heard you crying and screaming, begging the doctors to let you see the baby, your baby.

and from that day everything changed.

the news about you losing the baby quickly went worldwide. someone at the hospital might have spread the rumour that somehow reached the media and from that day your life became constantly hell.

you kept receiving condolences, from your family and friends, from the fans, from the company but those messages of support only marked the loss you just had.

drew took time off.

because he was there and he saw how bad you were suffering from that. he lost a baby too but he was losing you.

you stopped eating, you stopped sleeping, you basically stopped living. everytime you tried to sleep, you would wake up followed by nightmares, or good dreams about the life you could have had. and those dreams were the worst. because you knew you couldn’t have it now.

every night drew would let you in his arms, holding you while you cried and then eventually he would help you fall asleep again.

you didn’t let anyone in. not your family, not your friends. your best friend rhea was worried sick about you. she kept constantly asking drew to keep him updated about your health. she wanted to be there for you but you wouldn’t let her in.

after a few months and after many therapy sessions, you started living a little more. you lost a lot of weight and you barely recognised yourself. you lost your muscles, you lost your youth.

so, small steps. you started eating a bit more, sleeping a little better and started taking care of your look again. you started talking a little more with your family and friends. everyone noticed that you weren’t the same person anymore and that the person everyone knew and loved probably wouldn’t come back. but you were trying your best and everyone noticed that too.

drew came back to work and you both agreed to be together in this. you followed him everywhere, everytime he had a show in a different city. mostly because he didn’t like the idea of leaving you alone and because you couldn’t trust yourself if left alone for a long period of time.

you told everyone that you weren’t ready to come back. you didn’t know if you had the strength to ever come back wrestling again.

but you were there and making small steps.

you were glad your husband came back to the place he loved. you saw his behaviour changing in positive again and you were happy for him. you weren’t healed but seeing your husband getting more confident each day made you happy.

however when the whole feud with cm punk started, you felt a little uneasy. you knew how he was and you never liked him. you got to work with him back then, before he got fired and even back then, you never liked him. he always made sure to get on everyone nerves, he always had something to say, something to lie about and you couldn’t stand him.

he didn’t care about the people he hurt, he just cared about having it in his way. and one night in particular made you sick to your stomach.

you were backstage with rhea and damian watching your husband segment against cm punk, right after his loss at summerslam. and punk was pissed, he knew he lost that night and he couldn’t get over it. so he started insulting and insulting drew, but knowing your husband you knew he wouldn’t care.

“oh so you’re the big man just because you won” punk screamed into the mic. your husband look remained unfazed, and that made you smile “cheating won’t get you anywhere mcintyre”

“punk, if you weren’t so obsessed with your ego you would have easily won that match…” he chuckled making the crowd laugh “but you had to mess it up, you hit rollins, you pissed him off and then you pissed me off…and that costed your victory” the crowd cheered.

your husband was testing punk, two hotheads in the same room were nothing but pure chaos.

drew chuckled when he heard the crowd cheering for him “you know, it’s your stubbornness that makes you lose and lose repeatedly, you ain’t nothing but scam” drew laughed “there’s nothing i can do if all you have in you is defeat…”

“i may lose my matches but one sure thing is that i’m not gonna lose my family, you see, i protect the people i love on contrary of someone who couldn’t even protect his baby” punk smirked. he went too far but he hadn’t realised that yet.

there was a moment of silence in the arena, fans waiting for drew to say something. he was speechless. for a second he thought - did i go too far with punk?

but when he saw punk smirking he knew there were no words to describe how he was feeling so he simply acted on gestures. he threw the mic right in his face, making the crowd scream from joy, and then he began his attack on punk.

“what kind of man are you dickhead?” he whispered to punk, making sure the cameras didn’t catch that.

in the meantime there were you, backstage, watching the whole thing on tv. rhea and damian sat on the couch next to you, no one dared to say a word. rhea never talked about what happened because you didn’t want to talk about it and she respected that. so in that moment, she didn’t know what to say.

the only thing in your mind was the thought of your baby.

you and drew made a promise - you wouldn’t talk about the baby. you wouldn’t even say the word “baby”. it brought back to many bad memories and you both tried to go on with your lives.

but now punk made all the progress you made worthless. because you were there, sitting on the couch, your eyes fixed on the tv but your mind was somewhere else. your mind was playing trick on you.

that little bundle of joy that you imagined walked into your heart, mind, soul and lives and no matter what he wouldn’t have left, but you tried to move on.

so why did he have to bring back all the bad things?

rhea and damian shared a look. both too scared to speak.

you wanted to be left alone but you knew that if you left your husband changing room, you would get stares and you didn’t want to go through that all over again.

“can you please leave?” you asked them. your eyes still on the tv, watching how referees tried to separate the two men fighting.

“sure…” rhea softly smiled. she didn’t wanna go, she didn’t wanna leave you there, alone with your mind but she knew that in that moment, anything she would have said would be nothing for you.

so they simply got up and left the room.

you waited until your husband was back into the backstage. no one dared to say anything to him. everyone knew that punk overstepped but what are you supposed to say to someone who lost a child?

drew’s mind was thinking of you.

he knew you were backstage and you were watching the whole show and he couldn’t imagine what you were feeling. your own pain used against you.

who would do something like that?

when he saw you sitting there, still watching the show as it went on, with tears in your eyes, his heart broke. he saw the progress you made and he couldn’t be more proud than that.

but now he knew what you mind was thinking and he wished he could take all of your pain away.

“love?” he softly called you. when your eyes met you couldn’t help but let the tears fall down “hey…it’s okay” he didn’t care if he was sweaty or dirty, he needed to hold you and to let you know that everything was okay “come here love” he said wrapping his arms around you, letting you cry in his chest.

he knew what you were feeling because he felt it too.

“why did he do that?” your broken voice asked him “why…why he brought my baby into this?”

drew didn’t have an answer.

“i don’t know love…i don’t know…but it’s okay love, remember? it’s me and you against the world…” he softly whispered.

“it’s not okay drew…sometimes i feel like i failed…i feel like i failed as a mother because i was supposed to protect him, i feel like i failed as a wrestler because everyone has been waiting my return, i feel like i failed as a friend because i have been neglecting them and i feel like i failed as a wife because i’ve been neglecting you…i know you suffered from this loss as much as i did and for all this time you’ve been taking care of me and i feel like…i feel like i failed you drew…”

drew felt like someone just ripped his heart from his chest and threw it away. he couldn’t believe what you just said, he couldn’t believe you’ve been keeping this inside for months.

“hey love, look at me…” he lifted your chin up “i promise you that you haven’t failed me, don’t ever say something like that again okay? because i know how much it hurts, and i know how you suffered from this…baby i promise you that you haven’t failed anyone, i’m so proud of you for letting this things out, and i’m so proud of you for taking small steps every single day, it shows that you are still here…and i couldn’t be prouder than you” he wiped your tears away “i want you to know that everyone is here for you, everyone loves you here and everyone stands by your side…punk will face consequences for his actions and that’s a promise…”

“sometimes i imagine him, i wonder what he would look like…if he had your eyes or mine, if he had your little dimples or if he had my hair…i wonder if in the future he wanted to be a wrestler or a doctor…my life is constantly made of what ifs and i can’t live like this anymore drew…” your voice broke on the last part

drew was glad that you were letting everything out - he knew how much you struggled during therapy, feeling like the doctor couldn’t understand your pain because she hadn’t been there in your position, but at the same time it wished you didn’t hide those feelings from him because he wanted to help you heal.

“i know baby… sometimes i imagine him too because in my mind he has your eyes, and i like to think about having a mini you running down the house… and i know he would’ve loved you more because he would’ve been a mama’s boy” his last sentence made you chuckle “ but love we can’t live like this…we can’t live of what ifs…i know it hurts and probably it will never stop hurting but we have to move on” drew felt a hole in his chest because he didn’t want to move on, but he knew it was for the best.

“i know…” you whispered.

“what do you think if we go back to the hotel and we sleep the night away and then, in the morning when we are more awake we start talking about our future and how we wanna handle all of this?” you knew he was right. after what happened you didn’t make any more plans for the future, you’ve been stuck living in the past that you didn’t think about your future.

“sounds good…but please let me take care of your hands first, you are bleeding…” he laughed when you said that, loving the caring and gentle side of you, he let you take an emergency kit and clean his wounds.

he softly looked at you, admiring with such love and affection, that he knew you were the right person for him.

[myeagleexpert]

Hana's Demons of Lust

Today they are like this:

But in the beginning they were like this:

Just wanting to use her to get revenge From giving up revenge to trying to live a normal and cute romance Giving up the cute and normal romance to use his demon powers to make her stay by his side forever

(I got distracted quickly, I'm going back to Twst)

[dekukaze]

Guys I noticed something

Link Click S2 ending spoilers

So this scene when Cheng xiaoshi was dying, Lu guang had his watch on his left wrist.

BUT

After Cheng dies, Lu guang has his watch on the right wrist. Did he changed it after he died? I saw a theory about him replacing it on the right wrist since it was triggering for him cuz you know, the man it's traumatized :(

Bonus: The traces of Cheng xiaoshi blood on Lu guang's face I-

(They need to show us what the heck happened there 😭)

Idk guys, for me, I don't this is a mistake and it's a very important detail. I gotta check if on the Yingdu chapter trailer, where is the watch this time.

(guys, I'm so desperate ah-)

[team-iceflower]

Ruby: You make me sad and second guess myself. You can... you can be so cold, Weiss.

Weiss: *slowly placing her hand on Ruby's* I'm sorry, I-... I didn't know I made you feel that way.

[dez-ku]

OK but.... has anyone tried to draw angst spicynoodles that MK died and Redson is just making that mini flame of his looking like MK and is waving at him like how MK is????

Idk how to explain it bc it's like MK is Red's light you know????????

How tf do I explain this

And he just try to touch flame MK and accidentally just make it poof away which reminded redson that he really is gone 🧍‍♂️

He missed the feeling of MK's touch and hugs, that "annoying" voice, his smile and laugh

Everything about him, he just missed his presence so much which made Redson feel like there's more in life, opening redson's eyes bc of MK 🚶‍♂️

[bagely]

breath,

“have you ever wanted me to be different? ?” asked Missa, with a tremor of doubt in his voice. He felt a little scared that he had let that question out.

Philza frowned, puzzled. “Why would I want that?” A wrinkle formed between his brows, as if the very idea was inconceivable.

Missa tried to respond, but tears began to well up in his eyes before he could continue. He brought his hands to his face, trying to stop them, but to no avail. “I'm sorry...I love you, I'm so sorry, it's just that I'm...” The words choked as his breathing became increasingly agitated. “I don't know... sometimes I don't understand and.... I just want to...”

Philza rushed over, alarmed to see him crying. “I love you, Missa.” Gently, he gently pulled Missa's hands away from his face, watching as he tried too hard to wipe the tears away.

“I'm working. but I'm not with you with you...” Missa struggled to make sense of his thoughts. “And you don't deserve that.”

Philza felt a knot form in his stomach. “It's okay,” he said in a soft tone, trying to soothe it.

Missa shook his head in despair. “No, it's not okay. How can you... How can I look Chayanne and Tallulah in the eyes and tell them I'm leaving again?” his breathing became erratic, struggling to hold back tears. “I don't want to leave again. That's all I can think about, I don't want to do it anymore.”

Philza could barely keep up with his words. He took Missa's hands between his own, clinging as if he feared he might disappear. “Missa, you love what you do. And you love us. You don't leave to hurt us, you...”

“But I do, Phil. I do.” Missa interrupted him, in the firmest tone he could produce in the midst of his anguish.

Philza Was going to speak, but stopped, unsure of his own words, they caught in his throat. He felt his tears welling up, and began to shake his head. “And what am I supposed to do, leave you? Because I won't, we can't do that.”

“I'm already doing it every time I leave,” Missa whispered, with an expression Philza hated to see on his face. “Everything changes so fast, and I'm... I'm falling behind while you guys are moving forward. I don't want to be a burden.”

“A burden?” Philza denied firmly. “Missa, that's not true. That's not who we are,” he said in a soft, caring voice, though the tears and the trembling in his hand revealed his own unease.

“And who are we, Phil?” Missa replied to him, his tone bordering on frustration with himself. He might have lashed out if it weren't for Philza's firm grip on his hands. “Because I remember it wasn't supposed to be like this. I was supposed to support you guys.”

“You support us. I lean on you every day, whether you're here or not, just knowing you're going to come back.” Missa averted his gaze, but Philza took his chin, forcing him to look at him again. “Because I know you'll be back, and you can't ask me to stop waiting for you.”

Being caught by the intensity of Philza's gaze again, Missa couldn't help but break down once more. Heavy tears welled in his eyes and his breathing became heavy. “I just don't want to...”

“Let me finish, please.” Philza interrupted him with a firmer tone. “I know you're afraid. I'm afraid too. Everything is changing, I know, and it's horrible how kids change every day, but that doesn't mean we're losing each other. We may not always be together in the same place or at the same time, but that doesn't make us any less of a family. You don't have to be perfect, you don't have to always be here for us to stay who we are.”

“Everything feels so heavy. I don't want to keep hurting you...or Chayanne, or Tallulah.” Missa rested his head on Philza's chest, his tears falling on Philza's shoes.

“You're not hurting me, Missa.” Philza lifted Missa's head and pressed his forehead to his. “I'm more worried that you're punishing yourself.”

“I feel like I can't stop this, Phil,” Missa whispered, his red eyes still shedding tears. Her words came out calmer, but still laden with despair. “It's like I'm running in an endless race, and every time I try to stop, it all comes back to me. All these thoughts, this horrible feeling that I'm failing.”

“You're not failing,” Philza said, feeling a weight in his stomach, as if there was so much to say, but the words just wouldn't come out. “You're not failing,” he repeated, his voice barely a whisper.

Missa was about to burst into tears again. “I don't know– I can't stop. I–”

“Breathe,” Philza interrupted, pulling their foreheads apart and wrapping him in a hug, hiding his face in Missa's shoulder. “Let's just give ourselves a break, okay? We'll just give ourselves a breather, together.”

“A breather,” Missa repeated, nodding. His tears wet Philza's shoulder, but then they began to stop.

They held each other in silence for an endless moment, their bodies entwined in an embrace that seemed to hold all the words that couldn't be said.

“Better?” Philza asked softly, breaking the silence.

“Yes,” Missa replied with a slight nod over his shoulder.

Philza made a move to pull away from the embrace, but Missa held him tightly, refusing to let go. “Let's stay like this a little longer,” Missa requested, his voice barely a whisper.

“I could give you all the time in the world,” Philza replied, holding him gently in his arms.

[emmie-writes-stuff]

I made a Rin comic

One page comic, one full page drawing

Hope y’all like

[mentallyillastrophelfreak]

it is 4 am and I just thought of something. Regulus is the prince and James is just a servant (hehe so unoriginal)

James: I love you.

Regulus: You know you can't say stuff like that.

James: Why not? I don't care about what they say.

Regulus: But I do, James. My parents do, and I cannot let them or the kingdom down; not like my idiot brother did.

James: But you could run away. With me. With Sirius.

Regulus: If only it were that easy. I'm not supposed to be with you anyways.

James: Well, do you at least love me back?

Regulus:

James:

Regulus: I do.

[corinthianism]

cooking up something miserable for all my fellow loki fans ✍🏼🔥

[intosnarkness]

hi I love your writing!! what about 61. “I love you. I’m completely and utterly in love with you. Please don’t get married.” with kanej?

Come off anon and say that to my face so we can kiss because I need more Six of Crows friends to scream about plot ideas with. Also I hope you wanted 2500 words. I may post this on AO3 in the future, who knows.

This had to go this way or I would just be recreating "come to me in red" which is a fucking killer story and you should read it if you like this trope. Forgive typos, written and not proofread. (1 2 or make up your own) (ask)

It's not Kaz's fault. It's not anything wrong with him that made her start to doubt. He had been nothing but willing to try, to fight, to concede steps for her needs.

But it wasn't enough. It wasn't enough for either of them to have him on land and her at sea. It wasn't enough to spend a week together every three months. And when that last week - their fifth week together in over a year - had gone so badly, well.

"What are we doing?" she asked, after the second time she woke up with his arms around her and he woke up with her knife biting into his throat in defense.

"What are we doing?" she asked, after a brush of her fingertips had sent him spiraling, retching in the corner in a blind panic for the third time.

"What are we doing?" she asked, watching Jesper and Wylan hold hands as they walked through the streets, unafraid to be tied to each other. Neither of them frightened or fighting or hurting each other. Healthy. Whole.

He had no answers for her. No reasons that they should keep going beyond that he loves her. And she doesn't know if them loving each other is enough.

"Marry me," Kaz had said, on his knee in his bedroom, the night before she was due to leave again. "We'll get through it. It's hard now because we're just starting. It will get easier, and I don't want it to get easier with anyone else."

Somehow, it hurt that it wasn't a question. It hurt that he thought a couple of bands of gold could fix all the things that were broken in them. It hurt that she knew - she knew - that he could get past his issues. He was too stubborn, too determined not to. What she didn't know was if she could. If she would ever be well. If she would ever be able to accept the limitations that life and tragedy and trauma put on them.

It hurt that she loved him. And it hurt that he loved her, too.

"No," she told him, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She didn't tell him he deserved better, because he would fight her on that. She didn't tell him that he was insane to think this would change anything, because he probably knew. She didn't tell him that she wasn't going to stay in Ketterdam and he wasn't going to leave, because he wasn't asking her to. All Inej knew was that she had to stop this before it destroyed them both, so instead she closed her eyes and bit her lip and lied.

"I don't want to marry you. I don't want to be yours," she had swallowed the tears that welled up in her throat, forcing herself over the edge. "I don't want you to tie me down."

It broke her heart, but she knew it was the right thing to do. It was the only thing to do. It was all she could do.

"Inej--" it was too hard. It was too painful. It was too much.

She left before he could beg her to reconsider, and went back to her ship. And when they left the next morning, Inej pretended not to see the glint of silver in the shadows, watching them head for the horizon.

---

The letter is in a drop at Bhez Ju, but Inej assumes there are identical ones in Os Kervo and Shriftport and every other place the Wraith makes supply stops. She doesn't get much mail from Ketterdam these days, not since she walked out on Kaz. There had been a time when they were always waiting, neat lines of prose that she could imagine were full of longing. Letters inscribed by that careful hand that had held hers, that had bandaged her wounds.

But those stopped years ago, and now she gets occasional life stories from Jesper, or sweet missives from Nina, or business updates from Wylan, who has taken over Kaz's job of surveilling the merchers for slave activities.

She writes back, but she never asks what she wants to know.

How is he? Is he happy? Is he healing?

She doesn't get to know things like that anymore. It isn't fair for her to ask.

But the letter she picks up, six years after she went to sea and five years after she last saw Kaz, has that same careful handwriting that she's missed so much.

To his credit, it's not an invitation to the event. It's just an announcement. And it breaks her heart all over again. Because Councilwoman and Mrs. Radmakker are pleased to announce the marriage of their daughter Annemieke to the Honorable Kaz Brekker.

Her world doesn't end. It seems like it should, but Inej doesn't feel anything but numb at the words in front of her. Had she thought he wouldn't move on? Had she thought he would wait for her to come back? She never planned to come back, why would he be carrying that torch? That's never been who Kaz was.

But she hasn't moved on. She has waited. She hasn't loved anyone since him, and she isn't sure if she ever can. If she's just to twisted up and ugly inside to ever give herself to another person, after so much of herself was taken from her. She might have planned to let him go, to let him find his happiness in arms that aren't hers. But now, faced with the truth of it, Inej knows she can't. She can't let Kaz marry some mercher's daughter without at least telling him how she feels. She owes him that.

The heart is an arrow, she thinks as she walks back to the ship and tells Spect to recall the crew and set a course to Ketterdam. They have two weeks before the date on the announcement, and she doesn't intend to miss the love of her life walking down the aisle.

------

Summer storms on the true sea delay their return, and Inej finds herself sprinting through the streets of Ketterdam on the day of Kaz's wedding.

Someone at the docks had known about it - a plus to coming in to Fifth Harbor. He's getting married in the Church of Barter. Saints. What the Kaz she knew would say about that.

Still, at least it's not some roadside chapel where the pomp and circumstance would be done by 10 bells. Weddings at the Church are all-day affairs. It's perverse, to Inej's mind. There are all kinds of caveats; the wedding party has to clean the space in the morning to show their industry. The bride and groom have to hold an auction before the ceremony, selling something together to symbolize their intention of being a profitable union. Then they have to make a purchase of either land or goods from a fellow parishioner, which they tithe back to the Church.

In bigger cases - and this will be a bigger case - the auction can last hours, rich merchers elbowing each other out of the way to show their devotion, raising bids a cent at a time. The sale can last just as long, depending on who shows up to sell what. Having your offering chosen by the couple is an honor. It will be in the paper tomorrow, who the Brekkers gave their kruge to.

Only after that will they sign the contract and seal the union.

Capitalism as a religion is weird, and even after all the years she spent living in it, Inej knows she will never understand anything about the Ghezenite church.

But at least there are breaks between the auction and the purchase, and before the contract signing. Time for the couple to reflect and thank Ghezen for their prosperity. There's a chance. She's holding tightly to the chance that she will be able to get there in time to see Kaz.

She arrives, out of breath and sweating, on the steps of the church as the auction is wrapping up. The doors are open, and she sees Kaz next to a beautiful blond woman, as tall as him and just as pale, at the front of the room.

He's wearing gloves. Its the first thing she sees, his hands are covered. They're white, and they go with his tuxedo, but they're gloves. He isn't standing next to his bride bare-handed, like she had always imagined he would with her. They they'd stand knee-deep in the flowers her family would throw at them, his fingers bare against hers, as they pledged their lives to each other.

But she gave that up, years ago. She gave up the right to even imagine it.

Still, she climbs.

The groom's suite is hidden in one of the fingers, which is no challenge for Inej to scale and slide in the open window of.

In fact, part of her wonders if the window was left open for her. If he wants her to come in. But it seems more likely that he wanted air, because every room in the Church is either too big or too small; there's no concern for comfort in the world of profit.

Inej waits. She doesn't bother to sit, or to hide. She just stands in the room and waits for him.

It probably takes an hour before she hears voices - and she knows those voices! - coming down the hall, laughing and chatting happily. It's Kaz, she can hear his low rumbled laugh at whatever Jesper is saying in his smooth lilt. They're coming, and she's standing here and she doesn't know what to say.

When he enters, he does so alone, apparently having sent Jesper on somewhere else. He doesn't look at her. He just takes the silly top hat from his head and lays it on the dressing table next to the door before speaking.

"Hello, Inej," he says. His voice is a practiced neutral

After all these years, it's a dagger through her. He still sees her. He still knows where she is.

"Hello, Kaz," she replies, and neither of them moves. He doesn't look at her.

But it's now or never. It's now or he goes downstairs to make his purchase and sign his contract and live in bliss with his new bride. He goes to forget her forever.

The words bubble out of her mouth unbidden, the arrow that is her heart pulling them out and firing them at him. "I love you," she says. "I'm completely and utterly in love with you. Please don't get married."

Kaz has the audacity to laugh, bracing both of the hands on the table in front of him. Almost doubled over from how funny he finds it all.

"You lost the right to say any of that to me five years ago," he tells her, when he's done laughing at her. Inej feels heat in her face, but she knows he's right. She has no business being here.

"That action will have no echo," she offers, but it's not enough. What could ever be enough to erase what she did? The damage she caused by walking away and staying away. "I was 18, and I was scared. I thought I'd never be better for you. I--" she swallows the lump in her throat. "I was wrong."

Kaz finally turns to look at her, his eyes as cold and dead as they ever were for his enemies. She misses the warm brown of fresh dirt, the way he used to look at her like she was something special. Something worth having.

He probably looks at Annemieke Radmakker like that now. Inej hopes the other woman knows how lucky she is, to be on the receiving end of those eyes.

"You left," he says, his voice rising. "And you never came back. You left and you never answered my letters. You left me, Inej. And now you think you have the right to show up and ruin this?"

His anger has always been frightening to her - she was trained very specifically to respond in certain ways to a man's anger. She has worked very hard to not cower and cry when she's faced with an irate man these days. To not behave like Heleen forced her to.

"I did," she agrees. "And I was wrong. And I don't have the right. But I-- but you sent me the announcement, Kaz. What did you think I would do?"

His eyes betray him for a bare moment, emotion flickering through them that she can still read. He's angry, yes. Very. But he was hoping she'd come.

"Why are you marrying her?" Inej asks, her courage roaring in her ears like the sea in a storm. She even dares to take a step towards him.

Kaz shakes his head. "It's political," he admits with a shrug of his shoulders. "She knows it. She doesn't-- she doesn't care. She's in love with her maid, and I have no problem with the two of them carrying on as long as they wish."

Inej dares to reach forward and take his hand. "Do you want to marry her?"

His anger wins, and Kaz snaps his hand away from her with an injured noise. "None of your business," he hisses. "You left."

"And you called me back," she says. "Kaz. Don't go through with it. Don't marry her."

"What do you suggest?" he snaps. "That I go tell the councilman that I don't want his alliance? That I don't want his help in shutting down indentures in Kerch? That I changed my mind because the woman who broke my fucking heart five years ago just showed up and I'm going to let her hurt me again?"

Inej feels the words like a blow. shutting down indentures in Kerch. He's still trying. He's still working on her mission, after all this time. And he's willing to marry someone he doesn't love and who doesn't love him to get it done.

"There has to be another way," she says, but before she can go further, there's a knock at the door, and Jesper's voice is ringing through it.

"Boss? Time for the purchase."

Inej reaches for his hand again, and this time he lets her take it. "Please," she breathes. "I-- please. I won't run away again. I won't hurt you, not on purpose. I won't. I won't."

She's desperate, her voice thin and reedy. She's begging, and she thinks in any other situation it would be humiliating. Kaz hesitates, looking between the door and where her hand is gripping his.

And then it's like a dam breaks, all the things that Kaz has been holding back erupting out of him because he takes a single step into her space and his hands are cupping her cheeks and he's kissing her with so much hunger, and anger, and passion that Inej thinks if it's the only kiss they ever get to have again, it might be enough.

She starts at the contact, but the shock and the memory it brings passes; she grabs his lapels, pulling his body flush with hers. It feels so right, so good, that she can’t remember for a moment why they ever stopped doing it.

And then he breaks away, his eyes scanning her face and his breath coming in soft little pants as he tries to maintain composure. Jesper knocks again, and Inej starts at the noise.

"Kaz? You okay?"

"Please," Inej whispers again, leaning into the warmth of him.

"Do you mean it?" Kaz whispers back, letting his head fall so their foreheads are pressed together. "Do you love me?"

"Yes," Inej says, and nothing has ever been more true in her entire life. She loves him. She has always loved him. "And if you want I'll go down there myself and complete that terrible ceremony with you right now. Please."

"Okay," Kaz says, stepping back out of her grasp and straightening his jacket. "I-- I'll go and I'll put a stop to it. But we are going to have a talk."

Inej can't help the tears that spring, unbidden, to her eyes, and run down her cheeks. "Really?"

"We'll end indentures another way," he says, and he squeezes her hand once before he turns to the door. "Wait for me?"

She nods. "Always."

[dekukaze]

Guys, I just had this scenery on my head just rn

-------------------------------------------------------

Lu guang is possessed, or being controlled. He doesn't speak, he just responds to the one that's controlling him. Then he attacks to Cheng Xiaoshi and tells him to unalive his best friend. Cheng tried to wake him up but it was useless. In an instant without thinking, Lu guang punches him, throwing him on the floor.

Kill him He obeys

Lu guang's hands were around Cheng Xiaoshi throat before he could even react. His breath hitched, a sharp gasp escaping from his lips as his body tensed in sudden panic. Lu guang obeys and begins choking Cheng Xiaoshi. He tries to fight it, he tries to reach out to Lu guang, but it didn't worked. He tries to catch his breath, but he couldn't. Cheng's vision began to blur, revealing black spots. Cheng Xiaoshi it's almost crying and begging to his partner to not kill him and snap out of it.

"Lu guang, we're partners. You're my best friend. You gotta fight it..."

Cheng Xiaoshi mind was screaming for help but his body was growing weak. He couldn't feel his fingertips from preventing Lu from choking him. The grip growing weaker and weaker, as his body went limp. As soon he's about to pass out, he said his last words.

"It's okay, Lu guang. Its gonna be okay."

Cheng Xiaoshi's grip loosened on Lu guangs's hand. And the light from his eyes, faded away in an instant.

Silence was the only thing left. And in seconds, Lu guang came back to reality and tried to catch his breath. Damn, he was fighting it. He controlled his breathing until he saw himself on top of Cheng Xiaoshi.

What..? Why am I on top of Cheng Xiaoshi? What am I doing here-

His hands... His hands we're on Cheng's neck. He was gripping it. He was grabbing him from the throat. He was choking him. He let go and Cheng Xiaoshi didn't react. He didn't move. He didn't respond. Oh god...

What have I done...?

Lu guang panicked, and quickly tried to wake him up. But it didn't do nothing. He checked his pulse hoping he was alright- he has no pulse.

He doesn't.

There's no life on his eyes.

His pulse.

Why isn't...

Why isn't beating?

No.

No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No.. No. No. No. No. No. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. NO NO. NO. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO-

CHENG XIAOSHI!!

Lu guang k!lled him and needs to dive back in time to change the past again

(This is bad written but it's 2am and I'm tired but I wanted to write this, or I was gonna forget this, 😭)

Also, HAPPY LATE 091305‼️✨

[iwillcausechaos]

Fun lore fact!!:

Gairy's real mother(well father but fairy called him Ma, moma) doesn't know that Gairy is still alive and has been grieving ever since the whole town(+ the step mother of Gairy) kicked him(Gairy) out which caused him(the father) to go insane and kill his step wife since she was stopping him from going looking for Gairy.

Mother spore reminded Gairy of his Ma(mother) which was the reason Gairy clung to Mother Spore and called mother spore Moma & Ma.

:333 ❗❗❗

@aurum-the-yapper @ask-mother-spore

[golden-letters]

bitch this is all you’re gonna get. this life, this face, this body. you better not ‘maybe in another universe’ your way out of everything. sit your ass down and face this. go make tea and have a picnic and read a goddamn book. kiss your loved ones, send that damn text, and hug your siblings. this is all you’re gonna get.