#this is because he is a fucking crazy person and needs to be monitored while method acting

[ssruis]

In my head rui is super dramatic sobbing crying as tsk dies in his arms & the second the light leaves tsukasa’s eyes he stops crying is completely normal and just immediately revives tsk. There’s no fanfare or cool intense spells or dramatic action it’s just like waking him up. Tsukasa is both thankful but also a little mad because he had a super cool protagonist type death thing going on where surely he’d be remembered for ages. it’s like a beautiful ending of a play got fucked over by the author being too cowardly to kill off a character. It’s just bad writing Rui.

You can decide whether or not tsk knew rui could revive him and forgot or if he didn’t know but I implore you to choose whatever is funniest to you.

Alternatively (funnier idea) rui would never hurt tsukasa let alone cause his death even if he had a get out of death free card so if it was up to him this wouldn’t be happening. however chevalier tsukasa would absolutely charge into battles like a small dumb animal with no self preservation instincts (it is the “prone to biting off way more than he can chew” gene) so this is like the 30th time this has happened and every single time rks act super dramatic about it because they are annoying theatre kids & find role playing dying in your lover’s arms/your lover dying in your arms a very fun and entertaining experience.

Untapped comedy potential with sorcevalier where tsukasa dies and it’s super tragic and emotional he’s like “if my time has finally come then I can die peacefully knowing my loved ones are safe…” & then rui just revives him. All those dramatics for nothing. It’s like that one “wake up tails you fucked up big time” panel.

[genderkoolaid]

some misc thoughts on child abuse and adultism/ageism:

in House M.D 2x16, the patient is a disabled teenage girl, melinda. she's had multiple life-threatening allergic reactions, the last of which led to a car accident which resulted in her needing a heart transplant. her mother is shown to be extremely protective of her (not allowing her to attend public school, not letting her go outside, restricting who can visit her) and this is a major issue in her and her daughter's relationship.

about halfway through the episode, melinda goes missing from her room. one member of houses' team, foreman, realizes she is trying to get outside and went to the roof. he finds her sitting in the stairwell, distressed. melinda reveals that her mother was always extremely controlling over her- the point of not allowing her to do seemingly any after-school activities- long before she got sick, and that her daughter's heart transplant "gave her what she always wanted." foreman responds by saying that, because of her current illness, it's "an insane time to criticize your mom for being overprotective."

melinda expresses that her mother's abusive behavior has now been retroactively justified by her disability; she is seen as "insane" for being distressed by what is clearly a life of restricted autonomy. the scene ends with a line that has stuck with me since seeing it: melinda looks up at the stairwell and says softly, "i didn't even try to get outside. i was too scared."

the actual plot of the episode isn't the point. the point is that we tend to view "children abused by foreign adults" and "children abused by their parents" as two separate categories with opposing needs. children being taken advantage of by strangers should have been monitored and restricted. like the mother in the episode, the parent assumes that being more protective = the child being more safe. the correct way to handle child abuse is parental vigilance. sure, maybe this behavior encourages some abusive parents (who are probably the minority anyways, because I would never abuse my child!), but that's just the price we pay for making sure the other children are safe?

what i think this episode shows- accidentally, seeing how they never actually take melinda's abuse seriously- is how you can be fucked over twice. a child who is being abused by someone online can also be abused by their parent- are probably even more likely to experience that because of an abusive home. and then, if that outside abuse is realized by the parent, it retroactively justifies their behavior. it proves not just to them but the adult world that controlling behavior is rational and helpful- clearly, the abuse was caused because they didn't control enough.

and in both the episode and this hypothetical, the parent's reaction- while it may include genuine feelings of love- also comes across as being more distressed over the violation of one's possession than being distressed on another person's behalf. the child is an extension of you, and thus any desires it has that conflicts against your own are like an autoimmune disease. something to be shut down as fast as possible. vulnerable children, abused children, the "sympathy" given to them is a double-edged sword because as soon as you aren't the quiet, docile creature who agrees with whatever the adults say, you are crazy and ungrateful and "don't you realize we just want what's best? look at what happened to you!"

[lovergirlexi]

You Belong To Me (18+)

Pairings; Stalker!Seonghwa x Fem!Reader

Warnings; Smut, non consensual video taping and monitoring, entering the house without consent (always ask for consent irl), non consensual jerking off (? Not sure how to write that), this is mainly just plot and nothing too sexual. If I missed anything at all let me know!

Synopsis: You’ve been feeling like someone has been watching you for months, always playing it as paranoia because every time you tried to tell someone. They would always tell you it was because you were alone all the time…but deep down you knew it was something other than just being paranoid.

Word count: 865

✩ Lexi says — This is only the second smut I’ve ever written, so I’m definitely still very much learning. I’m also testing my own boundaries as a writer, so if this is bad I fully apologize.

“You’re mine.” Seonghwa whispered as he watches you through the cameras he installed into your house while you were at work — he made sure to know every single schedule you have down to a T.

Here you were, sitting with one of your friends on your couch while drinking wine with him, as Seonghwa watched the scene unfold his jealousy only boiled even more. You didn’t who Soenghwa was, you didn’t know he’s been stalking you for months on end.

“So, how’s the new life over here? Quiet, I assume.” Your friend, Oliver asked. Causing you to nod your head “It’s really quiet, too quiet sometimes.”

Seonghwa turned the monitor volume up so he could hear your conversation better, needing know if he was making any passes at ‘his girl’.

“Why’s that?” Oliver asked, you let out a sigh and shake your head slightly “It’s nothing, really.” Causing Oliver to rest his hand on your knee reassuringly “If it bothers you, it’s not nothing.” He said soothingly.

Seonghwa’s grip on his arm rest tightened seeing Oliver rest his hand on your knee, mumbling to himself “Mine. Only fucking mine.”

“I don’t know, it’s just I keep getting the jeebies of this place. I think is what it is.” You whispered quietly, barely audible. Oliver simply was quiet for a minute before saying “Okay, let’s talk about it. What part of this gorgeous house gives you the jeebies?” Oliver questioned, his hand squeezing your knee soothingly.

“Well, it’s not the house itself.” You started, running a hand through your hair in frustration. Unsure how to tell your literal best friend that you feel like you’re being watched all the time. “Then what has you so worked up, Y/N?” Oliver asked gently, not wanting to push too hard.

You exhaled a breath before blurting out “I feel like I’m being watched, constantly. All the time.” Oliver just looked at you stunned, not sure how to respond completely.

Oliver withdrew his hand from your knee before saying “What makes you feel like you’re being watched?” He asked, concerned. He knows you don’t just say things like this without a proper cause. “Have you been seeing the same vehicle everywhere or?” Oliver added before you could speak.

“No, it’s just something in my gut is telling me that I am.” You answered truthfully to Oliver, letting out a shaky breath. Oliver simply nodded his head “Okay, well. This is your first time living completely alone, Y/N. My best bet is you’re just extremely paranoid.” You stay quiet, this is the third person to tell you that you were being paranoid — you felt like you were going crazy.

After having Oliver over for quite a while, you felt absolutely drained. Taking a quick shower and changing into your pajamas, turning lights off and making sure the doors were locked.

As you’re laying in bed you let out a giggle “Yeah, paranoid.” You murmured to yourself before letting out a yawn and falling asleep.

Long after you’ve fallen asleep, Seonghwa shuts his monitor off and in a fit of jealousy and rage of Oliver being in your home. He finds himself standing in front of your house — where he’s been multiple times. Seonghwa let out a breath before quietly searching for a opening, where he can slip inside.

After about twenty minutes of rooting around, Seonghwa found an unlocked window — your kitchen window. He pushed it up quietly and slipped inside without a single noise, like he’s done it many times. He knows your house like the back of his hand, making his way upstairs to your bedroom.

As he approaches your bedroom, he saw your door was slightly open. Which was unusual for you. Seonghwa just concluded it to you just being too exhausted to close your door all the way.

“So pretty.” Seonghwa whispered softly as he stood at the edge of your bed, staring down at your sleeping form. He gently brushed a hair out of your face and leaned down to press a soft kiss to your lips. Careful to not wake you up.

After his kiss, Seonghwa looked around your room silently for something — anything that he could take as a souvenir, like he always does when he visits you. Finding your panties laying on the floor beside your clothes basket, he picks them up and pockets them.

Moving back to your bed, standing over your sleeping form once again. His jealousy was too much, he undid his belt and pants and quickly pulled out his hardened cock, stroking it slowly.

He let out a soft, quiet groan. The thrill of you possibly waking up served to turn him on even more, staring at your sleeping face as he picked up his pace. “My pretty girl.” Seonghwa grunted out, his tip leaking precum.

“Oh fu-” Seonghwa whispered quietly as he came hard, his cum dripping down onto your blanket as his cock twitched in his hand, letting the last spurt of cum out. Seonghwa quickly cleaned his hand off and tucked himself back into his pants, leaning down to press one last kiss to your lips before he leaves your house.

[wuishu]

She's everything. He's just Ken

(I love the Barbie movie so much)

“WHAT THE FUCK? I AM DONE WITH THIS GAME. I don't wanna do this anymore!” he whined while covering his face in frustration. Despite his efforts to work his way out of his enormous debt by streaming another truck sim, he still failed miserably. He was not really angry, he was just putting on a show. He was also getting tired, and doing this stunt made his end stream funnier. 

“Alright, I’m done. I’ll read your donations, and then end stream.”

Finishing his late-night stream, he couldn't wait to just rest with his girlfriend on a couch, watching movies until their eyes fell​​. He sighed and walked towards your recording room. You were currently streaming a game that wasn't a sweat-inducing game, but a chill game. Talking to chat while reading donations, you were getting comfortable when you heard your door open.

“I’m still streaming.” You moved your mic away from your mouth and looked at Schlatt. He hummed, indicating that he heard you. Your relationship was public, but people seeing you together in a stream was new to you. He was different on his channel, the usual crazy, anger-issued guy who has odd humor; he showed your viewer that he’s different when you're together. 

“Hey, Y/N’s chat” He waved his hand at your camera and smile, he found a wooden chair near you and pushed it next to you so they would see him on your stream. The chair was a bit small compared to you, but he still looks bigger. “What are you playing right now?” he asked you, handing him your other bud to let him hear the relaxing background music. 

You slowly swerved your chair, so you could be close to him. “It’s hidden folks. It’s like where's Waldo but listen” You pressed the chest and a man used his voice to imitate the sound of a chest opening. “Oh wow, not weird at all” he smiled

“It’s not weird, I think it’s cute that they're using their vocals for the game” He nodded and looked at your monitor, trying to help you find the things that you needed to win. You on the other hand, watched your chat roll looking at what they thought. He held your hand and moved the mouse to hover over a person. “There, that little shit hiding in the bush.” 

‘Well, you look at that chat. What a helpful man” 

After about half an hour has passed, he was getting so tired of helping you that you gave up and talked to your chat. Slowly he laid his head on your shoulder and also answering some of chats questions. You placed your hand on his hair and patted it like a cat. “Yeah, we wanted to watch the Barbie movie, but our free time rarely collides.” You didn't realize that Schlatt was falling asleep because of how soothing your voice was and how gentle you are at massaging his scalp. 

: Your ken is falling asleep

You slowly looked at your screen that opened your stream. You can see his eyes closed while he is silently snoring. “My ken is asleep… Alright, chat. I think we're gonna head out. I’ll see you guys on Monday,” you whispered. 

You woke Schlatt up to let him know that the stream had ended, he walked to your shared bathroom and started brushing his teeth. After doing everything he needed he lay down, and made himself feel comfortable in bed. You did your nightly routine while scrolling through Twitter, you noticed a screenshot of your stream earlier and a picture of Ken placing his head on Barbie's shoulder and clinging onto her for dear life and the caption was “They're literally Barbie and Ken”. You giggled while brushing your hair.

"Babe, are you awake?” he hummed quietly. You got on the bed and suddenly a hand was wrapped around your waist.

“We should totally watch the new movie Barbie tomorrow.” 

[tazienimp]

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY MEPHDOOM NATION~

SO!!!!!!! THIS POST HAS SOME IN UNIVERSE AND IRL LORE.

First up, the AU lore. Because Mephiles has reintegrated into the timeline, people remember him fully. Ever since he came back, people have been able to remeber him as if they never forgot about him in the first place. Well, one day, he got jumped after insisting to Doom he could take a walk by himself in the rain. (Keep in mind Doom is great with disguises due to his shapeshifting capabilities so of course he followed his lil dark prince. Also, rain helps Mephy cope and try to detach himself from the loss of his twin. Seeing the sun makes his grief worse.)

No one knows who it was that jumped Mephy, he was shoved in a delivery box and placed back on his husband's doorstep before he knew what was happening.

Mephiles had a severe panic attack due to being forcibly trapped in a small space again and forgot he could puddle his way out, and the cardboard box he was in, it was one of those that not even a utility knife can easily cut into said cardboard, so scratching at it from the inside didn't help one bit, even though it was wet.

When his hubby freed him moments later, the half god was fucking DETERMINED to track down those that did this to him. Doom eventually humored him, while never telling him that he ate the perpetrators himself. It's not the first time he's done something like that, but Mephy doesn't know about any of Doom's hyper protective and obsessive tendancies, he doesn't even think Doom enjoys his company or existance but instead merely tolerates him, when in fact Doom worships him in secret.

Btw, it wasn't the thugs that put him on the doorstep, it was Doom, he just had to play it off like he didn't know what happened and 'found' the box on the doorstep, to keep up the illusion that he totally didn't follow his hubby or eat those people. (Mephy is fine with Doom killing people but cannibalism kinda disturbs him, and he also doesn't like being monitored, it makes him feel like he's not trusted or one wrong step will get him locked up again. Doom also doesn't want to chase his secret deity away with his behavior due to knowing about Mephy's anxieties, but is desperate to keep him safe because of what happened to Mephy. They both have some personal issues they're.... working on, regarding each other.)

Also, fun fact, Mobian Doom has fur, but it repels water a lot like his leathery skin in his normal form does, while Mephy just soaks it up like a sponge, the poor thing. Literally sad wet cat behavior.

So yeah, weird idea for a Valentine's post, but that's where the irl part comes in~

So, i caved and bought the Mephy figurine. He arrived when it was raining heavily outside, so the box was wet, and he was a literal wet cat, and i couldn't shake this idea, but it morphed beyond just a silly meme idea XDDDD so yeah, there's your irl lore. Have the pictures i took too.

ALSO I KNOW I BEEN DRAWING THESE GUYS LIKE CRAZY LATELY BUT, LIKE, UGGGHHHH LIFE'S CRAZY RN AND I NEEDED MY BOIS TO CHEER ME UP XDDDDD

ANYWAYS, I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOJI, I LOVE YOU ALL 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Gonna pass oot now so I'll yeet this onto deviantart later

[m34gs]

so, a little rant.

Hey so, if I choose, when writing fanfic, to write Yukio Okumura or Renzou Shima doing Not Great Things, making Not Great Choices, or straight-up Behaving Badly; that is not an indication that I hate them, nor is it an invitation for people to come bash their characters to me. I'm not doing it out of malice for them. I'm doing it because I love them. I love their bad choices. I love their frustration and their anger and the fact they are literal teenagers acting how teenagers will. I love the different facets of their characters.

I love that Shima comes across as the "girl-obsessed play-boy" type when he's really not. I love that, while he is somewhat lighthearted at times, he's mostly hiding part of himself. I love him so much. It's easy to, from an outside perspective, condemn his joining of the illuminati. However, he was a teenage boy, in a family where he was told EXACTLY how his life was gonna go, and made to feel that he had to carry a burden he didn't want, and constantly reminded of the oldest brother that died that he never got to meet. It's normal for teens to want to try new things and to try and be independent and make their own choices (even if those choices end poorly) in even a regular, healthy setting growing up. With all of that added on, is it any surprise that he thought spying for the illuminati would be a good idea? Furthermore, the illuminati aren't fucking idiots. Of course they found the child that seemed to be struggling with following along a course of life he found no real attachment to. They're not gonna be able to convince someone who's sense of identity is rooted firmly against them. They're going to prey on a person's insecurities and needs. Not once did Shima feel like he was asked what he wanted to do. His brothers are old enough to remember the oldest, and to feel strongly about his death and want to take on the mantle, but Shima doesn't have those memories and connection. Of course he's gonna feel like he's being forced into things he doesn't wanna do. And then something interesting comes along and he decides to try it. Again, he is a teenager. He can't be expected to conduct himself within the same expectations as an adult.

Plus, he figures it out in the end. He figures out he values his friends. He feels guilty about the betrayal. He chooses their side later on. He makes a choice. But, it's *his* choice, not something he was forced to choose.

I also can't help but feel that if he didn't have that "girl-crazy" aspect to him, people would be a lot more forgiving to his character. Which is annoying. I mean, don't like him if you don't want to like him, that's fine. But he's also acting like a teenage boy in that moment. Yeah, his jokes don't always land and they're pretty perverted at times; but have you ever fucking met a teenager, regardless of gender? They make dumb jokes. They say stupid shit. They talk about raunchy things. And, as we go further into his character, it's not actually that he's Like That. He exaggerates a lot of his characteristics. I mean, who would think that the goofy, can't-get-a-date, yet desperate for girls, teenager with pink fucking hair is someone even capable of being a spy? Yeah, he likes girls. Yeah, he likes Izumo. Yeah, he's a bit of an idiot and he really can't seem to get a date, and he's a dork, but when we finally get the betrayal and the reveal, there's a part of him that is *different* and it has been hiding. He has more confidence than he lets on. He's more skilled than he lets on. And he's more conflicted over what he's doing than he lets on.

Let's not forget he's also being monitored by the illuminati, even if he is spying for them. As I said, they're not stupid. So, of course he has to put on a front, even when he might think he's alone with friends.

The thing is, I love his character, I love his development. I love experimenting with him making bad choices or engaging in dark behaviour. He's special to me. I tend to avoid fics that bash him or hate on him, which is my personal choice. I won't go after people writing those kinds of fics because they can write whatever kind of fic they want and enjoy it however they choose. But don't think for one second that I'm ever happy to see people hating on him in my comment sections or messages. I don't write him as dark or twisted because I hate him. I do it because exploring negative character aspects and negative character growth is one of the highest forms of love I can bestow upon my beloved faves.

The same goes for Yukio.

Yukio is, again, a literal teenager. He was forced into an adult role far too soon. He lost his father figure and didn't even get to say goodbye. He is fucking *grieving* but at the same time he now has to help his older brother figure out the world of Exorcists, while also keeping it a secret that he's the son of Satan. Unfortunately, Rin is not that good at keeping those kind of secrets and also has a shit ton of factors working against him; like unexpected visits from Amaimon, difficult to control powers, and being a bit hotheaded. Yukio is supposed to protect Rin, but within a few months of realizing his powers, Rin is suddenly being persecuted by The Entire Vatican, and scheduled for execution. Do people think it's easy to watch your twin brother get persecuted for something that's not his fault?

Not only that, but Yukio has an inferiority complex. Rin was born with the physical strength. Rin was born with Satan's flames. Yukio was not. Yukio was reliant on Rin when they were really little. And that still frustrates him to this day. On top of the fears of Rin being executed, the stress of being an exorcist, the demands of being a teacher, and the loneliness of having lost Shiro, Yukio also feels inadequate and has a thirst to prove that he is just as good as Rin. While Yukio has to work his ass off to get where he is, Rin comes by strength more naturally and that irritates Yukio. Yet, he also hates himself for feeling that way because what kind of brother thinks like that?

In addition to all of this inner turmoil, Yukio lives in constant fear that he will awaken demonic powers as well. He has a front-row seat to how much people hate Rin on-sight for just existing as the Son of Satan with blue flames. Yukio has built up reputation, connections, and skills. He has worked so hard for this. But, if he shows one ounce of demonic ability, it could all burn to the ground. And this is something he has zero actual control over.

It's clear when, in the manga, he does start to awaken things, just how panicked he is. He's skipping his physical. He's trying to avoid others. He can't let them find out because all his hard work will be as good as gone and not having demonic powers was both at once a source of jealousy against Rin but also a fucking comfort because he wasn't up there on the chopping block.

He is in so much turmoil, and for people to just go "he's treating Rin poorly" or "he's not fair to Rin"; like, yeah, he isn't. He is not treating Rin fairly or nicely. But it's not like most other people would be able to manage everything he is going through AND be the Ultimate Best Supportive Brother on top of it all. Give the guy a break.

I hate the idea of characters needing to always act Correctly (TM) even when facing the most extreme and awful circumstances, lest they become condemned and hated by fandom. For one, it's nowhere near realistic. And two, how fucking boring would it be to never see characters make big, high-stakes mistakes? No, their circumstances don't mean their actions are "good" or "excusable"; but it gives a lot of light onto why they act the way they do and that is the more important part. Understanding characters and their motives is way more important than making sure you only like the "good" characters. That's where the reading comprehension comes in. That's where people can practice and learn to think about how a person's circumstances and environment might influence them. That's where people can explore the fact that "good" and "bad" are overly simplistic terms that really have no business being applied to people; as people can behave in both "good" and "bad" ways...often even within the same day. People are far too diverse in personality and actions to ever be categorized fully into neat little boxes of "good person", "bad person", and that is reflected very well in both Yukio's and Shima's characters.

[polarized-here]

POLAR I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR OCS AND SEE THEIR CONCEPT ART‼️ please I need food, I need to eat your art sjdhhsjdhsj /lh

GRAHH FINE SINCE YOU ASKED… my lore. Sorry this is so late gngahgahshsjsh… you literally caught me as dinner came home. Like. Oops… crazy… right after I knocked out shekhrkdbddmbd anyway! :)

Under the cut because it may or may not be a long thing, with most plot points just being little ideas—no fully fleshed story, just, erm. Ideas I like.

Update. It’s long. Also tumblr is so glitchy rn it kept making this saved post disappear and then reappear in my asks after I exited the app and opened it again what the fuck 😭😭

So, in this world, a majority of the population do. Not. Have powers, having them is seen as a blessing, But… It's a dystopian themed world—where these powers are incredibly monitored and regulated by the government—with some being minor, and some being full on changes to the physical body and how they manifest. (ie. My excuse for drawing anthros… or kemonomimi… shushhhh/also allows me to just dump all of my ocs which you may have seen before, in one little world and play with them like they’re my puppets :( I love them sm!! One of them sora is from DND they hold a special place in my heart...)

But again, having these powers is seen as a blessing from a God of some sort—and a curse, as while they’re regulated by the national government heavily, some individuals still manage to slip by, or cause harm to the general public, so from this, they (the gov) took advantage of this to instill a system of ‘heroes’ and ‘villains’ there’s a few ‘vigilantes’ but most either become heroes (through turning themselves in and doing plenty of community service work, and discussing a contract with some government representatives—most who become heroes are never the same. They always have a look in their eyes, as if valor to help their nation has blinded them), but some may become villains.

Heroes are those who just have a license and have signed a contract with the government—most get these contracts renewed or take a small few month break in between contract renewals. They’re unable to use their powers in these circumstances, unless it’s out of self defense. Civilians can too (those not heroes, are regulated by the government heavily, and choose not to pursue it. But it’s like US NAVAL contracts too. you can join programs in the gov that give you supplemental access and benefits to college/pay it off, etc etc etc. like the national guard but more celebritized), but they (civilians) need to find a GOOD lawyer. There’s so many laws that heroes are naturally given a smalllllll pass over, that it’s just best to run away, or be a hero in that small instance.

(This has sm mha influence. As sad as it is, that show influenced me sm. Got me into trying art. Fr fr/on digital. PLA is just where it improved a weeee bit).

OKAYYY ENOUGH AGOUT THE SET UP!! THE CHARACTERS… I’m so sorry idk why I’m rambling this much, I’m not even hyperfixated on my own OCs. Like what the fuck.

Anyways! A key note is that having bright colored hair is a key identification that you probably have powers that haven’t manifested yet, and the hair is always a bright color, unless, you’re Astor!

He’s got so much trauma *slaps roof of car.* You can fit so much trauma in this one bad boy. And despite it all he remains a good person. Dawg. You have more strength then I’d ever have. But igggg the want and need to help people because you were hurt and want to make a change does seem motivation enough… anyways. They’re so marysue coreee

The main character & a small-time vigilante going to the new school that’s just been set up. His hair only really turns those bright colors when she’s using their powers—but in the ref it’s just for convenience sake. She has so many skeletons in her closet, that they can’t risk being caught. But they love helping people too much. They’re a bit altruistic.

Here’s their vigilante suit ref :)

For ease of mind, they always have a small bit of static on their hands—both to stun new people meeting them. To make the air feel charged with thunder and electricity—a warning to her presence, and because it means their hair stays that color. No matter the charge. His eyes stay the same color though. Again. These are some old doodles from last year of some characters. Notably, that I also revamped. Heroes, villains, and vigilantes stories always hold a special place in my heart,,,

Next up is Anzu! Silly goober!!! Please give him head pats!!!! He loves it!!! This is Astor’s only… real friend. Since Astor likes his solitude. But tolerates Anzu’s silly behavior. Utter dichotomy between them!!! <333 I haven’t decided if they’d get together or nah, but! <3333

Yeah, this guy (and Astor) both have autism (I didn’t even realize that him liking trains was an autistic stereotype… oops. Mb gang. But like. Seriously. Ywah didn’t mean anything by it. I’m autistic myself and I’m possibly pursuing physics or engineering 💪💪 I think it’s alr if I project onto a character I made 🔥🔥🙏)

Yes, he’s based on the irl dinosaur. Yes, he’s autistic, hear me out. I just put lots of things together. And he just ended up with major tism 🔥🙏

And finally, a hero I designed :) I changed her a weeee bit. But she’s mostly the same sand manipulation :) villains dislike her since she puts sand in their shoes. Her big container is full of sand and stuff. She doesn’t have a weakness other then she needs to be a bit concentrated on making her sand creations—but they’re like second nature to her because of how long she’s been a hero. She’s an antagonist only because she’s trying to take Nexus in. She sees how sweet she can be to the native cats (from a distance. Never touching them, and she never knows why, they look at the native cats, longing to pet them but always stops) so she wants to take him in and make a case for him to join the government’s hero program.

Arizona! But her hero name is Sahara yk… Yeagh…. Anyways :) I love her lots. She does mean well. But she’s also blindly faithful in the government, or will see its problems and will deflect or try to be better to make things right. But she always holds rules above anything else. Even if she cares about someone who’s breaking them, a lot, so yeah… totally not talking about the mentor and mentee relationship between her and Nexus… where she pushes her morals aside just to listen to him seldom talk about his intrepid interests.

If Nexus didn’t have those powers—in her opinion—she would’ve made an excellent leader in whatever field he’d want to pursue. And she knows he’s got something up with them—some history. And that breaks her heart a little seeing how much pure joy Nexus gets at being able to try new things, like new foods, or try out purely common things that should be normal to a kid like herself.

Very much love found families and going to the extreme for them :33

ANYWAYS!!! Those are the main 3. I have some others I’ll show. But yk. They look a wee bit different + have names labeling them and the key parts of them. I don’t think tumblr would like me dropping all their refs :,)

Actually :O hold on, their refs are here. Trust

I’m so smart for pasting them all here. Trust anyways. Those are my pookies, so sorry this took so long.. erm I like them a lot. Oh yeah, I made a comic with them for art class. Yeagh. They were mostly changed for ease of drawing but yeah. I did not want to do it but I had not wanted to do this 🚬🚬

But yeah, pookies…. Sorry you probably didn’t want this comprehensive lore about them grrr

[phantexxx]

Tyrant Empress [F4M, Longterm, Semi-Lit, Discord]

TLDR: I have a tyrannical elven empress who I would love to pair with an equally crazy, brutal ruler from another kingdom. 

Please at least skim over the rest of this post. I am SO sick of people only seeing the NSFW tag and DMing because of it. 🥲 

Looking for fantasy worldbuilding nerds!! I need somebody who has a homebrew kingdom of their own as well. I’ll listen to your world building rant if you listen to mine haha

Hey there! I’m Cain, I’m 21, and I’ve been roleplaying in my free time for a few years now. It’s been a while since I’ve done any long-term stories, and I’m super excited to get back into it! As an artist, I prefer to roleplay with other people who also draw! I enjoy making art of my roleplay partners’ characters and doing art trades, but it’s pretty one-sided with a non-artist. I understand how this can be seen as rude or picky, but I just write better with fellow artists, and this is a non-negotiable, sorry!! One of the main things I’m looking to do is merge my characters canon storyline with that of my partner’s character! 

Before I get into the story, there are a few things I’d like to clarify! First off, this roleplay will fall into a few different genres: dramatic, angsty, toxic, fantasy, etc. The fantasy kingdom where this roleplay takes place is based off of India, so do not bother replying if you’re going to be a racist weirdo. Yes, this is something that’s happened enough that I must say it outright. 

With that said, here’s the plot. 

⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻

In the elven kingdom of Sahknu, those born with albinism were considered horrific omens—cursed by the gods, marked for death. Infants with the condition were slaughtered in the name of Ruven, God of the Moon. 

But when King Akkar’s own daughter was born pale as bone, he refused to let her be another sacrifice. Instead of allowing her execution, he bent the old laws of the kingdom to keep her alive. It took ludicrous amounts of money, threats, and relentless extortion, but in time, he forced the church to proclaim the child as something divine—a miracle, not a curse: The ‘true’ reincarnation of Ruven.  

Thus, the girl was named after the god himself and forced into the strict, suffocating role of Grand Prophet. From infancy, she was trained to be saintly, modest—untouched by mortal indulgence. Every week, she sat in her temple, blessing visitors, attending endless religious affairs, her life controlled entirely by tradition and royal duty.  

But as she grew older, Ruven found herself yearning for more. The temple was a glorified cage, her existence a performance with no room for any personal desire. She had no privacy—not even for a moment. Servants monitored her every step, as declared by her father. Akkar would not change his ways. So, she learned to be sneaky instead.  

At first, it was small rebellions—sneaking off in the night, taking time to enjoy the freedom of finally being alone. But all good things must come to an end. When Akkar caught wind of her actions, he was less than pleased. Promptly, he enforced stricter rules unto her.

It backfired spectacularly.  

Ruven only grew bolder, more reckless. If they wanted her to be untouchable, she would drown herself in indulgence. She snuck into brothels under the darkness of night, drinking, watching, surrounding herself with mortal pleasures simply because she could. She flirted with guards just to see how far she could push them, if they would go rigid and ignore her or encourage her words. She did whatever she pleased, and the more they tried to restrain her, the worse she rebelled.

Outside of her lack of privacy or freedom, Ruven had an otherwise fortunate upbringing. She was a princess, for fuck’s sake—pampered, powerful, and perfect. Her father handed her everything she wanted the very moment she asked, and she never had to lift a finger unless it was to summon a servant. She was spoiled, arrogant, and completely assured of her own importance.

So, how does someone fourth in line to the throne end up ruling an empire? Simple—by sheer, bloody circumstance.

The coup came without warning. Southern rebels breached the palace walls in the dead of night, cutting through the royal family like mere livestock. King Akkar, slain in his own bed. Maeral, his eldest son, gutted next. Then Maeral’s wife. Their daughter. The slaughter continued until only two survivors remained—Maeral’s young son, Ruhal, and the king’s youngest, Voron.

And where was Ruven while her family was butchered in their own home? Drunk, half-naked, and tangled in the silken sheets of some high-end brothel, entirely oblivious.

By the time she stumbled home, the palace was a wreck—smashed furniture, bloody floors—the stench of death, that coppery metallic scent of blood, was one she would never forget. Before she could even fully process the horror, a crown was shoved into her hands. Ruhal was too young to rule, and she—somehow, ridiculously—was the only suitable replacement.

Her first act as queen? The execution of the eldest son of every southern family in Sahknu. A mercy, in her eyes. After all, she could have wiped out their fathers, their wives, their children. She could have caused them all the pain that she suffered. But she didn't. They should be grateful she was so generous.

Her descent into madness was a quick one. The grief was unbearable, though she never said as much. She had spent her life alienating her family, dismissing them, hating them. Now, in their absence, she missed them more than anything. She would make it right. She would do them justice. She would become the greatest conqueror Sahknu had ever known.

The moment she named herself Empress, a title unexitant in her kingdom until then, she set her sights outward. She demanded full submission from neighboring countries, and when they refused, she released her navy upon them. Ruven was not a ruler—she was a warmonger, relentless and insatiable.

Her people despised her. All did. Tyrants are rarely liked anyhow, especially ones who (quite literally) bathe in the blood of their enemies. But fear was enough for her. She crushed every voice of rebellion through execution, and with every conquest, she dragged Sahknu into further wealth and power. The army swelled. The lands expanded. The empire flourished.

And yet, Ruven was unsatisfied. She had gold, land, power—any whore she desired at the very snap of her fingers. But she wanted something more. A partner. A rival. Someone worthy to be spouse.

So she set her sights on the only kingdom she had yet to conquer. The one empire that had crushed her armies, humiliated her forces. The only kingdom she both admired and despised in equal amounts.

⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻ ⚜ ✦ ⚔ ✦ ⚜ ⸻

As you can tell, Ruven is a very shitty person! This is intentional, and no, she can not be fixed. I am looking for a fellow tyrant that she can fawn over and be all evil with—somebody who makes her even worse. She needs somebody who matches her energy. Like, they need to be the power couple of the millennium lmfao. 

Overall, her main goal is to make her empire as powerful as she can manage, as well as make some heirs worthy to be in her bloodline.

Yes, this roleplay will have smut, but that is not the main focus—the plot is. I’m looking to write with somebody who isn't skeeved out over the topic of NSFW, but also isn't drooling over their screen haha

If you’re interested or have any questions, feel free to message me! I love to chat with my roleplay partners OOC, too, so never hesitate to reach out. :)

[manicpixxiedreambitch]

Okay so there is this person, right? To protect his/their privacy, I’m referring to them as Mitch. This is nowhere near their actual name. He is a good friend of mine, and I am grinding my teeth in annoyance because they have a boyfriend who is a MAJOR red flag. The boyfriend guilt trips him over everything, forced them to cut off a bunch of their friends, tries to keep them from texting other people, and then it gets WORSE. The dude used to track them on Life 360. He can have the password to their phone, but they can’t have the password to his. HE MONITORS THEIR DMS WITH THEIR FRIENDS. He goes through their phone. Any time they mention hanging out with friends he tries to guilt trip them and say something like “Oh well we haven’t really talked much in three months or whatever but okay” or “That’s fine, I’ll just burn myself out working to keep myself busy while you’re out on vacation with them, but hanging out with them must be more fun” and try to manipulate them into doing what he says. I’ve been trying for MONTHS now to get Mitch to dump him, but Mitch is still hesitant to leave the relationship. Apparently a few weeks ago Mitch did in fact try to dump the guy and the fucking douche nozzle replied with “Oh, you really decided to do this to me on a day I was feeling really suicidal???”

🚩🚩🚩

And so of course Mitch being the kindhearted person that dumbass DEFINITELY DOES NOT DESERVE, felt guilty enough to stay. The guy proceeded to love bomb them like crazy afterwards, too. Three days later I’m hearing this and I’m like “Well he seems happy enough all of a sudden with you he must not be so suicidal anymore. You should dump him now.” And Mitch is like “No because he’s being so nice now!!! And loving and attentive and he has issues but he’s trying to change.” And I am like “Bro you JUST wanted to break up with him. How long has he been telling you he’s trying to change and what changes have you seen?” And Mitch listing a few small things that were the bare fucking minimum like “Oh well I guess he’s not getting so mad. Like the other day I mentioned wanting to hang out with (mutual friend) and he didn’t get mad about it, he just acted a little weird.” And showed me the texts where he got “weird” where he essentially said “We never hang out anymore… but it’s just so much easier with your friends, ig”. BRO WHAT THE FUCK?????? And I’m pretty sure it’s like Mitch has to ask the dude before they even try to think about hanging out with their friends. The guy doesn’t even go to our school. He goes to an entirely different school. And I have this one friend who used to date the guy before and he said the guy was doing that bullshit then, too. And I’m trying to tell Mitch that they deserve someone SO MUCH BETTER. They said that they understand that but they really want their relationship to work. I essentially told them their relationship was more than a couple cracks in the wall or a leaky pipe, it was a whole burning house. And they are still with the guy and it’s so SO frustrating because I can’t stop thinking about how much more they deserve.

I can’t stop thinking about them, and at first I was convincing myself that it’s nothing. I’m not interested in Mitch, I’m just a concerned friend who hates their toxic boyfriend and wants the best for them. I’m just protective of my friends.

…right???

Wrong. Because then the thoughts turned to something different. I keep thinking about how they deserve better. How if they were MY partner, I wouldn’t be treating them like that. I’d be giving them respect and space when they need it, and I wouldn’t make them ask for my permission for anything. And then it proceeded to me thinking about how cute they are and how amazing they are. And then I started having these little daydreams of taking them out on a date.

So, in spite of me saying literally two months ago that despite being bisexual, I have never felt myself attracted to people beyond male and female, I am finding myself developing the smallest, tiniest crush on my trans/genderfluid friend.

What the fuck do I even do with this??????

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 4

Episode 9.5: The Hero And His Helper

Warning: mentions of toxic relationship (drex is a bastard). poor (y/n) gets mildly hurt/mild violence (bruised wrists).

"Line up, line up...come on, line up!" Ray hissed to the others under his breath, waving his hands at them like a madman while keeping an eye on his oblivious girl. 

Thank god she was still checking their databases and voicemail. Otherwise, she'd see how much of a nervous wreck he was, clasping his hands around the ring box and wringing them together to try and stop them from getting clammy as Henry, Jasper, Charlotte and Schwoz did as he said. 

They had no idea why he needed a line or was so snappy, but they put it down to nerves when they saw the sweat dabbing at his forehead and the way he couldn't stop swallowing. Right, nervous, really fucking nervous, that made sense. 

If they were tense, they couldn't imagine how he felt, minutes away from making the most romantic gesture one could, the ultimate confession of his feelings to the girl he was crazy about and whilst they knew that nothing could mess it up, not his fumbling or any tongue-tied rambling, he wouldn't believe that. 

This had been planned and honed meticulously, shaped and carved with the most intricate details so every moment would drip with his love for her, and no one wanted to ruin that, not when he'd spent restless nights over many months or even years, trying to find a way to condense it all into a single moment. 

Jasper was the most likely person to scream, give the game away or just spontaneously combust, notorious for being flappable under pressure, but he set his lips into a solid line, silently nodding to Ray, whose eyes begged him not to mess this one up for him. He'd always proclaimed to be Captain Man's biggest fan and that he would do anything to help his boss. Now he could, by shutting up and standing calmly with his friends, something he swore to do. 

This wasn't a Captain Man moment. This wasn't the time for delusions of grandeur, this was a man putting his heart on his sleeve and by god, he was gonna let it flow freely, for himself, for Ray, for (y/n), for their little family. 

"Not a word..." Ray murmured to the group, his voice barely above a slight hum, but they heard it nonetheless and nodded once to show their understanding before shuffling back so the hero would have a bit of space. 

There was still crap around the room, dirt trodden all over the floors, cables snaking around pretty much everything, scorch marks from where things had overheated and no one could ignore the partially melted, still smouldering time machine in the middle of the room. The place was a mess and not the heavenly scene he'd first imagined when picturing his proposal. A field of roses or four big words drawn into the sand on a scenic beach would've been more cliché, fairytale and intimate, but then again, would it? 

He'd found that love was a feeling, not a place and he felt it at that moment, with her and his family, regardless of whether the Man Cave looked nice or not. He didn't need splendour. He just needed to do it when it felt right. And that was now.

"(y/n)..." He called her name shakily, cursing himself for sounding so clumsy and so evidently terrified, but she didn't pick up on it. To his tender surprise, the computer chair slowly turned around, her eyes lingering on the monitors for a few more seconds before she ripped them away, wanting to know what was up with her boyfriend more than whatever was flashing onscreen. 

Her face was smiling pleasantly and, clearly, the anticipation was unexpected for her. The box was engulfed by his hand and gripped tightly in his palm so the velvet lining was hidden from view, so she just assumed he was asking if she wanted takeout or if Colin needed feeding. Something boring, something typical because why would he be proposing? This was crazy... 

"Yeah? What do you need?"

"Do—Do you remember how we first met?" Ray started, the question falling from his lips before he could stop it and it visibly confused her faintly, a brief glimmer of perplexity in her eyes at such an odd thing to say. It was weird and totally unplanned, a surprise to both their friends and himself since he'd had a whole scenario in his head, all ready to go so he could stick to a structure and not get anything wrong. 

Well, that had been the plan, but when it came down to the pinch, Ray found himself diverting from his course as the rigidity soured his spontaneity and his heart tugged to the more natural order, which just so happened to be that question. Going back to the beginning, a very good place to start.

"Of course I do. Eleven years ago..." She replied, the confusion clear in her voice, but she went with it, letting her memories come flooding back as she remembered that fateful afternoon, the day that changed everything.

~

"I have an iced hazelnut latte for...(y/n)." The bored teen at the counter yelled over the buzz of the downtown cafe, her lifeless and sleep-deprived eyes searching for someone buzzing to get the drink she'd just made like it physically hurt her to do so. 

Her gaze snaps to a plucky, young student shuffling through the crowd, a folder of something she didn't care about shoved under her arm as she dodged the lunching businessmen and gossiping nannies, queuing up for their toasted bagels and macchiatos, and stumbled towards her. 

Great, she brought the cheery enthusiasm that made her sick, her smile shy but friendly as she approached and the teen wondered why she'd chosen to serve coffee to strangers because people like her were irritating, way too excited for a busy Tuesday lunchtime. 

"Yeah, hi, that's me." (y/n) gave the teen her best smile as she took the chilly takeout cup from her hand but despite her best efforts, getting her to return the sentiment was useless. The trainee barista was as emotionally square and cold as the ice cubes clinking through her milky drink and the awkwardness between them intensified when she dared to add a splash of her friendliness to the exchange. Sure, it was out of her comfort zone and her brain was saying no, let's just go, but what did a smile cost? 

"Thanks. I hope you have a nice day."

"I don't care." The teen's reply was blunt and cutting, making the young woman wrinkle her nose at how her simple token of gratitude and politeness was met with such standoffish rudeness. Well, that was the last time she was gonna go out of her way to brighten someone's day, once bitten, twice shy and all that. 

It wasn't; it went against her nature and demeanour, one day that teen would start smiling again and realise that it's not all bad, so she didn't let it dampen her spirits, not when she had the iced version of her favourite coffee and an entire free afternoon of going over the mechanical theory of adhesion. What bliss.

"Right, okay...happy to help, my ass." She mumbled after glancing at the girl's name tag and the annoying slogan printed there before she turned her back on the counter and began to walk away. 

Her eyes were set on the cosiest corner of the cafe, the one that had a bookshelf, a red and blue Ankara rug spread across the wooden slats and a huge armchair hidden behind a potted palm, which allowed her to disappear into a world where logic and reason ruled hand in hand with the purest field of study a person could take. 

Mathematics: the thing she knew and felt safe with because numbers are straight and immune to misinterpretation, unlike people who tended to be unpredictable and difficult. She couldn't go wrong with statistics and figures because what you see is what you get, and she preferred things to be like that. 

Her corner was free, ripe for the taking as study groups crammed for their exams and the big city lawyers sipped their espressos, all of them too busy to care about the best seat in the joint, so she steamed ahead, her target picked and primed. Her scuffed sneakers hopped between the tables, her head low and her brain on autopilot as she moved across the cafe, making a beeline for the chair and on her way, she passed a dude who could only be described as shady. 

Creepy and deserving of being put on a list also sprang to mind, but she paid no mind to him, believing him to be just another customer in search of cake and a natter, not a psychopath who'd singled her out as she'd done with her armchair.

As their bodies crossed adjacently, his arm shot out and seized her wrist, the one that held the iced coffee in its adjoining hand and her breath caught as she found herself in a terrifying situation all too quickly. 

The scuffle of him twisting her arm behind her back, thus making her squeeze her cup too tightly and causing its contents to eject all over her plaid button-down as she instinctively struggled against his iron grip, caused a stir with the families and individuals in the cafe, who perked like meerkats when they heard her shriek. 

That was only the beginning. 

Panic ensued in everyone, not just (y/n) as the man bent her arm upwards in the most unnatural way and pulled a handgun from his hoodie's pocket, the mouth pressed to her temple before she knew what was happening. Her ears were ringing as the few people who noticed began to scream and scraped their chairs back to run for it, something she wanted to do until the man's threats started.

"EVERYONE CLEAR OUT OR THE GIRL DIES!" He yelled to the terrified customers, forcing a whimper from his hostage's mouth when she struggled against his body, her eyes scanning the room for anyone with the balls to make a stand and save her, but there was no one, no bravery in sight. 

The lawyers suddenly had court appearances where they weren't the murder victim; the mothers ran to their children; the students decided that studying was for losers and they all stampeded for the exit, a mad-rush mania consuming them as they fled for safety. The staff cowering in front of their coffee machines made to leave as well, abandoning the sinking ship in favour of saving their own skins but not before the man pointed his gun at the cash register, (y/n) gulping as it left her skin for ten seconds whilst he barked orders.

"All the money in a bag, now! Don't think I won't shoot her." He snarled at the oldest of the team, the one who had the key to his desires on her chain and she quickly nodded in agreement, her trembling hands barely able to get the key in its hole as her colleagues fled, including the teen who already hated coffee houses as it was, this just cemented the feeling. 

(y/n) steadied her gasps her air as much as she could, trying not to show the desperation in her eyes as the barista filled one of the cafe's free tote bags with a few twenty-dollar bills, one fifty, a couple of tens, three fives and a whole load of coins, the total coming to what looked like barely one hundred and fifty dollars in total if the young woman's estimate was correct. A pathetic amount for her life, or at least she thought so, so much trouble and lives damaged for the cost of dinner for two at that new place downtown, Soto Voce. 

The man's fingers impatiently danced on her throbbing wrist as the woman dropped a few cents and rapidly chose not to pick them up, seeing how he was getting trigger-happy towards the nice girl who always came in and asked for the same thing. She knotted the top of the bag together so it formed a small sack worth practically nothing and she left it on the countertop, her hands returning to the sides of her head as she shuffled away. 

He jerked his head towards the door, graciously giving her his permission to run for it as he forced (y/n) to start walking, eyes set on his prize as the woman barrelled past. She barely spared her customer a glance, merely wished her a silent prayer of protection as she put self-preservation before her hospitality, but the girl wasn't mad. She probably would've done the same if she faced the same problem; she wouldn't choose her either if it meant she got to go home to her family. 

"You're my ticket out of here, girl, so I don't want no funny business. You hear me?" Putrid breath hit her right ear and then her nose, causing her to swallow away any retching that crept up in her throat and she found her voice and in a moment of despair, her courage. 

"I think we both know that you ain't getting out here." She smirked, knowing that provoking him was reckless and pretty stupid, a sure-fire way of getting herself killed all over her mouth, but then she had a thought. 

It was her life and death; why shouldn't she choose how to fight for it or how to mess it up? 

She didn't have much, she didn't know how to punch properly or negotiate to save her life (literally), but she had hope, that glorious spark igniting her resilience when a flash of red and blue caught the silverware around the room. Salvation.

"Shit, shit, shit. Fuck, the cops, what did you do, you little bitch?" He growled when more lights flickered outside and he spun around with her body still contorted against him. 

Sweet cheese, there were at least four squad cars out there, a gazillion officers lined up behind their open doors and all of them ready to take a shot at the lunatic they were staking out in the shop, the lunatic who felt terror beginning to set in.

"I didn't do anything. But there's these wonderful new inventions called cell phones. Maybe you've heard of them?" She sassed, feeling her heart drop the stone it was carrying when she saw the men and women lining the street, all of them there to save her and get her back to her dorm room safely - a shitty room that had never sounded so nice. 

Her captor wasn't so optimistic though and realised that he'd picked the wrong time, the wrong place and the wrong setting for an armed robbery, his mind flashing back to how nearly every student in the cafe had a flip phone in their pockets. No doubt, they'd all dialled nine-one-one as soon as they were a safe three blocks over and had reported that a woman's life was hanging in the balance before calling a much more prestigious line since muscle and brawn always triumphed over criminal stupidity.

"Shut up. Just shut up or it won't just be fucking coffee on your shirt." The man told her, drawing an eye roll from her at how he was trying to get clever and more threatening, but to her, it was just another shot aimed at her already shielded sanity. 

Right, yeah, her chest and tummy were icy cold and sticky from where the cup had spilt and ruined her outfit, including the paperwork she'd brought with her for studying. It was now all lying on the wooden floor, ink smeared and running as the coffee bled into the pages and left it useable; thank god that they were only summary sheets and nothing important. Still, what a dick. 

Her legs were damp and the plaid fabric above it was starting to cling and crisp as it dried out, making her more indignant with the entire situation.

"That's what you think, fuckface." (y/n) growled, switching from flight to fight as a hidden strength rose within her and fuelled her need to overthrow the man, who wasn't expecting her to jerk so rapidly. Her head ducked away from the gun first, her brain reasoning that his reaction would be to squeeze the trigger as soon as she moved, so she clenched her free fist, the one that had been foolishly yet luckily left to dangle, and thumped him in the face. 

Her knuckles rapped across his cheekbone and squished his eye just enough for the hand holding her to release her wrist in favour of covering it and her waist wriggled away from him, the safest place for cover being the table immediately in front of her. 

(y/n) ducked behind one of the shitty, retro, wooden frames, certain that the likelihood of it stopping a bullet was slim to none, but it made her feel better for a split second as the psycho snapped out of his pained shock and took aim at her again. 

Fuck, she thought he was bluffing when he said he'd do it. He'd actually take the shot if something spooked him, but she was an engineer, not a psychologist and had assumed that like her, he could never kill a fellow human being. 

His finger ran down the curve of the trigger, their eyes locking as a snarl left his lips at her defiance and blatant stupidity, his black heart making the decision there and then. If he was to make it as a big-time criminal then he was gonna have to get messy along the way, starting with her.

"Sorry, kid, wrong place, wrong time..." He shrugged and straightened his arm, making her tears fall as she regretted the last; god, how long had it been? An hour? Five minutes? Ten? Fifteen? 

She honestly couldn't say, but it felt short, really short when compared to the life that flashed before her eyes, twenty years that didn't seem like the fair share she'd been promised by nature. She had a lot left to live for, including her graduation in just two weeks, all her friends at the Swellview Tech Uni, her family back home, and whatever was laid out in front of her, the stuff that hadn't happened yet. 

Was she going to let him take all that for one hundred and fifty dollars? No.

"Damn right, asshole." She cried, her voice ragged with emotion as her fingers curled around the chair she was crouched behind and lifted it with the power only adrenaline can provide, her eyes honing in on the man's ribs, all twelve of them exposed and vulnerable on his left side as his arms were drawn away to shoot her. Her grip stayed on the back of the chair as she swung it, aiming for anything that looked soft, squishy and like it would hurt from blunt force trauma and boy, did she get her desired result. 

The ferocious velocity was unexpected for her and her captor, him not expecting her to move so quickly and her not believing that her skinny arms could do it, despite the pressure. They really were pieces of shit, splintering apart upon impact with his chest and an added bonus was that a stray leg sent the gun skidding across the floor, but the main event was how he bowed in pain, clutching at his possibly ruptured innards and cursing the day she was born.

"Fuck you, bitch." He spat as his furious gaze met hers and she let out a breathless laugh at how the tables had turned. It was probably the stress catching up to her, but she felt proud; the hunted had become the hunter, the prey was formally the one thirsting for blood and she still had a thick chair leg clutched between sweaty fingers.

"Fuck you too, dude." She replied curtly, her lips pressing into a line before she cracked the lump of wood down on his head whilst he was still bent over and in pain, the collision causing his eyelids to flutter shut as the world went black for him, leaving the cafe silent and her the victor. 

That was good, right? She'd won; she'd survived; he was unconscious on the floor and destined to wake up in a jail cell with the mother of all headaches, swift justice. 

So why wasn't she smiling?

The leg clattered to the floor as she stumbled back and realised what she'd done, what he'd done, what they'd been through. Right, a man with a bloody head on the floor, police outside wondering what the silence and stillness were about, sticky shirt, fingers not shaking, breathing getting rapid, walls closing in, cafe getting small...

A man was unconscious because of her. 

A man, who admittedly deserved it, was going to jail because of her. 

She nearly died because of her stupid mouth, fuck. 

Okay, that had happened, rationality triumphing over emotion as the need to survive still coursed through her blood, her heart still beating like it not only needed to do so to survive but also to remind her that it was still working, a sign that she'd done okay by reason's standards. 

Emotion's too; all those people who could've been taken and held, the grumpy teen working her way through high school, the lawyer putting scum like that behind bars, the students still fresh-faced with youth and the mothers nurturing their young ones for a similarly bright future. 

A child: it could've been a child with a gun to their head. A son, a daughter, a friend, a mother, a father; not going home because they were grabbed, but they weren't. It was her instead; she was the unlucky one, wrong place, wrong time, just like he'd said. Thank god for that. 

"You're alive and not hurt and good, (y/n). You're good and you deserve a coffee. Yeah, coffee, coffee's good, coffee kicks ass. I like coffee." She muttered to herself like it was a comforting blanket for her bruised soul and the more she rambled, the less the panic set in and the smoother her movements were. 

She stepped over the criminal's body, careful not to step on him because that would be cruel and disrespectful. Even if he hadn't spared a thought for her life, she wasn't like that. She was way too sweet.

It was a bit sad that she knew how to make an iced hazelnut latte from scratch without the need for a recipe or some guidance from one of the baristas, but she'd watched them do it every day through her journey to achieving her degree. 

She'd watched every step, knew every bottle they plucked from the fridge, every button to press on the blender as she whipped one together, adding the ice first, exactly six cubes like they always did, and she even wrote her name on the cup, although properly spelt unlike when that teen did it. The straw poked through the lid with a satisfying glide once she'd poured out the creamy contents and secured the lid, turning to her snoozing problem still on the floor. 

Right, well, she didn't want him to wake up whilst she went outside and greeted the police, who she'd soon learn were useless in everything they did, so it was no wonder they didn't come running in when things quietened down. He could scarper once he saw that she had gone and he was left alone, leaving him free to go back to his lair to lick his wounds and plan revenge. She didn't like the sound of that; some lunatic chasing her down because she got one up on him, so leaving him was out of the question.

She'd have to drag him. Not impossible, not implausible, just a bit tricky. Looking at the floor, she guessed that the wood had been sanded down and walked on enough to create a smooth surface where he'd receive some splinters but nothing too bad. The real problem would be the concrete sidewalk outside, a quick friction and resistance check telling her that he'd probably be really fucking difficult to shift, especially considering that she'd be yanking him with his arm in one hand and her coffee in another. 

That's what she'd do. She'd take him out, let them grab him and then she could go to hospital and have a meltdown, the perfect end to a perfect afternoon.

"Okay, asshole, you're coming with me." She said, feeling a bit stupid that she was talking to an unresponsive man as she picked up his limp wrist, careful not to drop her drink since there was no way that she was gonna make another one. A third spillage would be a sign from the universe to give up and she wasn't quite ready to do that, standing up straight and bracing herself for the long haul. The very long haul.

The guy's arm was vertical as she made the first pull, straining with all her might as his body slid across the floorboards just a bit. His black hoodie and jeans combination proved to be more frictional than she first anticipated and she was yanked back at the lag, but she luckily didn't drop the latte; it merely sloshed about over the ice. 

She'd have to double her efforts and she bit her lip as her muscles tensed before she went again, his body moving as she started pulling him towards the door, hand, wrist, elbow and arm getting sore but she kept going. His head nudged a table leg, no doubt adding to the bruises and lumps he already had under his greasy, dirty blond hair, but she couldn't bring herself to care, not after how she'd been treated and when she was in touching distance of freedom. 

Finally, she was at the door and she could see the officers whispering amongst themselves through the glass panned, them having obviously seen her approaching and their grip around their handguns readjusted and their arms straightened, obviously ready to fire at the first sign of trouble. Well, she'd had quite enough of that, trouble and the prospect of fatal injury, so her heart pumped faster as her leg shuffled around to prop the door open, the knob turning ever so slowly as it was stupidly difficult trying to nudge it a full three-sixty degree with a drink in her hand, but she managed it. 

Still uncaring, her sneaker bashed against the bottom panel, sending the damn thing flying wide open at last and she kept moving, gulping slightly when she saw just how many guns were pointed at her, the police wondering what the hell was going on as they saw a young girl dragging one of the most wanted men in the city like he was a dog on a leash.

"Don't move or we shoot! State your name and purpose!" The senior officer yelled at her as she took a few struggle-filled steps, causing her to instantly freeze on the spot when she realised they weren't joking. Come on; they were meant to be the good guys. She was meant to be the victim and yet they were giving her suspicious looks and treating her like she'd robbed a cafe and held an innocent student at gunpoint, talk about a waste of the taxpayer's money.

"Uh, well, I-I'm (y/n)... Purpose..uh, what's my pur—" The young woman stammered, dropping the guy's arm so he faceplanted the concrete path and just laid there, her caring more about how she was possibly in trouble for something she hadn't even done or played a part in. The shaking was coming back and emotion was welling up inside her, making her grasp on the plastic cup intensify and it all looked so fucking bleak when...

"Hold your fire, fellas! It's okay. It's okay! I'm here, nobody panic, I'm here! Captain Man is here!" A powerful voice sounded out and a large figure emerged from the crowd, red and blue jogging onto the scene as everyone parted for their hero, the only one they'd listen to at a time like this. 

Holy shit, it was him...Swellview's greatest hero, the one all her friends secretly adored and had pinups of on their dorm walls, the guy whose face never seemed to be off KLVY News. The one, the only, Captain Man. 

He was just as handsome as everyone said he was, just as huge and muscular as all the gossip magazines described, and he was heading straight for her.

"Hello, citizen, don't be afraid. I'm here to make...all the fear in your pretty eyes disappear." Ray smirked as he swaggered up to who he could only assume was the hostage he'd been told about, who'd obviously managed to run for her life, seeking comfort in the arms of someone strong, tall and mysterious—namely him. 

The only thing he hadn't been told was how she was so damn pretty, a bit dishevelled and smelling of sweet coffee like the one in her hand, but he wasn't that shallow. He could tell that she was probably weak and vulnerable after such an ordeal and for those lips and hips, he could be a shoulder to cry on.

However, (y/n) wasn't dumb. Shaken and in need of a medical once-over, definitely, but stupid and blind to his advances, certainly not. 

As much as she could see his handsomeness and muscles rippling under his superhero costume suit thing, and had heard all the juicy stuff from her friends about how great his ass was, she knew that he was a terrible flirt, a ladies' man, and dated anything with a pulse. So, the fact that he was trying to pull her after she'd basically done his job for him really pissed her off. 

It was flattering to think about at first, but then again, is flattery a compliment when its quantity is valued more than its quality?

"Are you taking the piss? I've been in there, scared out of my mind with a gun to my head by that fucking psychopath, praying that he won't fucking shoot me and that's the best you've got? Damn right, I'm scared, you little spandex bastard. You got here too fucking late!" She snapped, ignoring how he recoiled at the torrent of filth leaving her mouth. 

Normally, she'd be appalled with herself for using so many curses in the space of five seconds, her mother's scolding voice echoing in her head, but she was angry and rightfully so. 

To hell, if she was talking to the most sought-after celebrity in Swellview like he was a piece of dirt after he paid her a compliment that some people would probably pay money for if it meant he was the one who said it to them. 

To hell with the consequences of standing up to him with so many police officers willing to back him up with their weapons. 

To hell with her rationality. Her brain was telling her to leave it, let him say his piece and then go. But he was a person underneath that mask exactly as she was and like any other person who pissed her off to the point of exploding, he received the sharp end of her tongue.

"Uh, right, okay, I was on my way over here, got stuck in traffic, but I can take the guy out for you...where is he?" He stumbled and fell from his high plinth of prestige, shocked that such a small and innocent young woman could snap back so harshly and to him of all people. 

He was normally quite good with the ladies, more than good actually; they fell before him when he entered a room, sent love letters to his Man Cave as if he'd actually reply to them, and claim that because he took them on a divine date, he wanted something substantial and serious. So, the fact that this gorgeous girl in front of him wasn't swooning made him nervous. That was new.

"He's right here. I already took him out, smashed him over the head with a chair...no thanks to you or your police friends!" (y/n) growled and stepped to the side, pointing at the man on the floor who was just a black slump to any onlookers and Ray practically felt his eyes pop out of his skull when he saw him lying there, the guy he'd been trying to track down and capture for weeks. 

Two policemen came over to drag him away, his body still limp even as they slung his arms over their shoulders and carted him off to a jail cell, and all the while, Ray had two things on his mind; how a girl of her size was able to take him down single-handedly and without any training, and whether she'd be up for going out for a drink with either Captain Man or Ray Manchester.

"Right, okay—ahem. This is slightly awkward, then." He coughed, trying to work out whether he found her hot or if she terrified him before settling on a bit of both. It was a thrilling mix of emotions, one that made his heart beat faster when those eyes gaze at him like they were penetrating his soul and he wondered how he could approach the big question, "hey, I really fancy you. You wanna go for coffee at some point?". 

Coffee. Coffee sounded good in his head. She was holding one right now, those scarlet-stained lips wrapping around her straw to finally taste her sweet creation and he decided that it was a good place to start. The execution, however, could've been better. 

"You have coffee on your shirt."

"Oh, really? Thanks, Holmes, for another brilliant deduction. Just count yourself lucky I'm not sending you the cleaning bill after everything I've put up with today." The young woman replied curtly, not finding his mentioning of her sticky shirt very funny or flattering. Cheeky dick, yeah, she felt like shit and she probably looked like it, but she didn't need a reminder, not when she was already having a tough time of it.

"Uh—-sorry about that, just let me give you my phone number and you can text me the price whenever," Ray said, pulling the latest PearPhone from his belt and flipping the screen open so he could give her his digits, a sneaky way of keeping in touch with her that was hidden by the falsehood that he was accepting the blame in all of this. 

He didn't know this girl and she obviously wasn't too fond of him, but strangely, the thought of not seeing her again seemed so disappointing; he couldn't just leave it and move on. A defeat wasn't an option, not for a guy like him. 

"Actually, it would probably be best if you give me yours too—so I know who's texting and stuff, you know. Can't leave a beautiful girl like you hanging."

"I-I know what y-you're doing, but fine. Whatever. Here's—here's my phone. I take it you can find what you're looking for." (y/n) stuttered and dug out her back pocket, having forgotten that it even existed when she was fighting the criminal, not that she'd had any opportunities to call for help. 

It sort of worked against her point to give the man her number after being so short-tempered with him and it wasn't just because he called her beautiful, even if it did send her heart racing. She'd bet ten dollars with anyone that he called all the girls he met beautiful and offered to take their details to call back later, so she was sure that it would just get lost in the numerical sea. He wouldn't even remember her by the time he found it in his contacts list again and she'd just become another passing stranger - no harm in that.

"Cool...what did you say your name was?... To go with the number, I mean." Ray faltered when he saw her eyebrow lift and cursed himself for appearing like a dickhead in front of such a lovely girl. What was wrong with him? 

He was blushing like a teenager, fumbling like a moron and getting tongue-tied like he hadn't flirted for all of his adult life. She was different though, she was something new and he wanted to get to know her better, particularly since she seemed to have some raw skills hidden under her student appearance. She was feisty yet sweet and just the sort of talent he was looking for, so maybe...

"I didn't say, but it's (y/n). My name is (y/n)...(y/l/n) if you really must know. (y/n) (y/l/n)." 

God, what was that? She sounded like a dumb, lovestruck idiot, losing her confidence when he paid her the slightest bit of attention as if it made them any closer or meant that he liked her. She was probably all tits and hips to him, just a pretty face, another inexperienced waif to string along before severing the connection—and dear lord, why did that suck so much? 

He was known for it, and he'd had more girlfriends than she'd had hazelnut lattes; it was typical and expected, so why did she let it upset her? It must've been his handsomeness and his charming ability to make anyone like him that gave her a pinprick of jealousy. Yeah, that was it.

"A beautiful name for a beautiful girl." He smiled at the blush that tinged her cheeks and unlike with him, it was clear to see because she wasn't fortunate enough to be wearing a mask. 

Wow, her smile was radiant and not faked like the ones plastered onto the faces of the models he knew; they really were all tits and hips. This young woman wasn't though; she had what looked to be an equation written on the back of her hand and a makeup-free face that spoke natural beauty, not falsity. She was different. 

"Yeah, well, I should be going. There's a paramedic over there who has a shock blanket with my name on it." She gave him a polite smile, hiding her disappointment that all good things come to an end because if she didn't cut it off now, she just might run the risk of falling in love with him.

That would only leave her in tears and him wondering if she was mad. Captain Man didn't do falling in love and honestly, neither did she; she was too busy for that crap and even though his attention was...heavenly, she wasn't going to give herself false hope. She was too busy for that crap too.

"Oh, god, yeah, yeah. You should probably go to the hospital, let them check you over...and thanks for everything you did today. It was really sweet of you to do my job for me." He returned the pleasant look, also not letting himself droop at the thought of their chance encounter being over. 

Damn, he was just getting into his stride and he'd probably never hear from her again once they parted ways, no matter how many texts he sent to pay for her laundry. It was a very small price to pay to see her again, not that she'd ever reply. The trauma of the attack had no doubt affected her and left her shaken, so it made sense that she'd disassociate herself from the memory, including him. Hospital was fine and so was he.

"No problem, you doofus. If you ever need me to kick ass again, just call me. You know my number." She laughed, breaking the awkwardness as she swirled what was left of the latte. She was hurting her own feelings at this point, fully aware that she had more chance of becoming president than getting him to remember her, but a girl can dream, right?

"Yeah, if I ever need a sidekick, I'll talk to you about it...I'll see you later." Ray grinned, stepping back when she did. 

Well, this was it, this was goodbye and it had been an honour to laugh with her. For the first time in his life, the hero found that parting really is such sweet sorrow. Damn, maybe he would accept that date with the redhead tonight if it meant his heart would stop hurting so much—and after meeting one girl no less. 

"Okay, later." (y/n) smiled until his back was turned and it fell into a sad frown when she realised there was no later-  her brush with the superhero was done, finished, finito, nothing more to be said on the matter. 

He was off to pose in front of cameras and wine and dine the finest women Swellview had to offer, while she returned to her dorm room to retell the story over a carton of sweet and sour chicken. 

God, that seemed so pathetic and she was only brought out of her self-wallowing when the same paramedic draped a thick orange blanket over her shoulders and told her something about shock, trauma and a checkup. 

Right, she was another victim and another face he'd saved, nothing special; she could barely do her eyeliner straight let alone wear a sexy dress and walk in ten-inch heels. She wasn't his type, so she left her hope at the cafe as she clambered into the ambulance, feeling calmer when the doors blocked the memories and took her far away.

It was a good thing she was going to the hospital. The incident had scared her half to death, but it was nothing compared to the near heart attack she was gonna have when she saw the name "Ray Manchester/Captain Man" listed in her contacts. Whoops. 

~

"I never expected you to call me back three days later." (y/n) smiled at her boyfriend, letting the memory sweeten her mood as she recalled how he flirted with her back then, only for it to be instantly nipped in the bud when she became his employee, a line of professional drawn between them that stopped any feelings developing, or that had been the plan. It didn't work out in the end and thank Christ for that, otherwise, he wouldn't be standing there looking at her with a gaze that could melt butter and a heart that couldn't stop fluttering.

"I knew you were smart and strong and sweet. I just didn't know how much. All I knew was that you were beautiful, and I wanted you to work for me. So damn much." Ray replied. He still got the same butterflies from her, still felt nervous when it came to asking her big questions, like the one on the tip of his tongue, and he was so damn glad that he'd taken the leap all those years ago and entered his real name into her phone. 

It had been a risk and for days he'd mulled over whether it had been a mistake or not, but the minute he got her call and he heard her trying not to hyperventilate as she told him her qualifications, he knew that he'd picked right. He gave her his name then and, hopefully, he was gonna do the same now.

"All girls were beautiful to you back then. I thought you would never feel the same way I felt because I was so different from everyone you dated." She murmured, letting her eyes grow a little misty as she remembered the waves of emotions that overtook her when she felt anything for her boss that could have been more than friendship, only to scold herself for dreaming about something that could never be. 

It felt silly now, knowing that she was living the dream with him sleeping in her bed at night and not just because of a nightmare; she was wanted there, something that in the beginning, was unfathomable because someone else's imprint had been left there from a one night stand or a date that never went further.

"I'm sorry, sweet girl. From the moment I met you, I saw how special you were and I hate that I only realised it when you were in someone else's arms." Ray shut his eyes for a long second, knowing that his silent friends had their eyes burning into his back. Schwoz knew the story like the back of his hand; after all, he'd been there, he'd lived it, but the teens had always been shielded from the horrors that had taken place all those years ago in the old Man Cave. A time he'd rather forget...

~

Flash-forward two months since little, old (y/n) (y/l/n) had an aneurysm in her bedroom after seeing that Captain Man had really left his number on her phone (he had, holy shit, he had and more), and she was gainfully employed as his helper, assistant, part-time cleaner, part-time mechanic and whatever else he made her do. 

She didn't really have a job description apart from being the prettiest face around the Man Cave, which she still thought was a weird name for a hideout, but whatever. His place, his rules. 

Complaining wasn't really an option, not when he'd offered her a permanent place of residence in his home as a live-in whatever she was; graduating college left her with a shiny degree, still hot from the printing press, but it also booted her from the dorm room she'd occupied for the last two and a bit years, which had been a real problem until Captain Man, ahem, Mr Manchester, ahem, Ray, stepped in to help.

He wanted her close, had found her smile charming, and he wanted to get to know her better, pull off some of his best flirts. Hopefully, he'd take her out properly and see where it went because she was alluring and different, but he had no idea how close she'd become - just not with him. 

He'd introduced her to Schwoz and they got on like a house on fire, science buddies akin to a mentor taking on a diamond in the rough. (y/n) knew her stuff, but she lacked the kind of experience you can only find out in the field with a skilled hand guiding you, so they were fine; solid friends already, no problems there. 

What stung him and was a real fucking blow was how she got on with his secret sidekick, Drex. 

The guy he'd taken on as a student, a blank canvas that he could paint and sketch his morals onto, had swooped in and captured her attention quicker than he could've blinked. Before he knew it, he was practically spitting out his morning coffee when he came down from the sprocket and saw them locking lips. His hands were cupping her cheeks tenderly and she was blushing as she grinned into the kiss, feeling like she was on cloud nine when he asked her to be his girlfriend. 

Hold on, back up, had Ray missed something? 

He was the wooer, he was the boss, he was the one who made moves and yet here was his best friend and his newest helper canoodling. In front of him. Freely. Ew.

That had been months ago. Four months, one hundred and twenty-two days, two thousand, nine hundred and twenty-eight hours; however, he looked at it: it sucked. Plain and simple. 

He hated this. He hated their relationship and as such, he hated himself. 

They were happy. He could see that; Schwoz "saw" that. She smiled and held his hand, baked him cookies and gave him kisses when his training didn't go so well. Drex was living the dream with the most beautiful girl in Swellview, hell, the world, by his side, in his bed, whispering his name and calling him babe like it was a goddamn prayer, whilst Ray was living in hell. 

He tried to ignore it, told himself that it wasn't right; she was his sidekick's girlfriend and obviously intent on staying with him. She was his employee, for god's sake, younger than him by a handful of years yet here he was, pining after her like she was actually in reach. 

God, he wanted her. Not want like that; she was a person, but he wanted that with her. A relationship, romance, hugs that signified more, giggly moments where "doofus" carried love and not mirthful banter - why did she have to call him that? 

Sometimes, he allowed himself to fall into the mindset that she might just feel the same, have an inkling of interest to maybe go on a date with him, dream about his lips like he did hers, but then he came back to reality and brutally chastised himself. That was his friend's girl, a young woman with future prospects and a good guy—a solid guy to help her to get there and who was he to ruin that?

He was older, her boss, her boyfriend's mentor and her friend. And that was the end of that. Feelings, be damned.

It all came to a head during a particularly dull afternoon, where there was nothing extraordinary, nothing out of place or weird, but an elephant was in the room. 

An angry elephant, ready to stampede and let out all that hate, but he hadn't reached boiling point.

Drex was training, kicking the life out of a dummy as if it had spat on his grandma or something. His rage was disguised as a pure determination by his unsuspecting friend, who was lifting weights on the other side of the room. 

Friend, yeah, right. Friendship was cheap and Drex had learned that you couldn't trust anyone, especially those who said they could be trusted. He'd seen the glances, the longing stares, the lingering hugs, and the irritating nicknames. He'd seen them together, how he acted around her, how he hung around her until the last second, and how he pretended not to feel anything for his girlfriend, who had just so happened to walk through the door.

"Hiya, what you guys doing?" (y/n) greeted them warmly, not letting her smile falter even when the stench of sweat and general manliness hit her nose. Her eyes looked at Drex first, her brain telling her that it was only right that she should since she was in love with him and his girlfriend. That's what girls did when they liked someone, right? 

He was sweaty, shirtless and conventionally hot, like those guys in cologne adverts who always seemed to have oil on their chests, but even still, she couldn't find it in herself to feel the same fluttering she once did. 

Day after day, encounter after encounter, she found herself losing feelings, seeing a change in the blond man and his good nature, and what she saw frightened her. It frightened her...a lot.

"Training," Drex answered plainly, releasing a grunt after the last syllable as his fist collided with the dummy's silicone face with enough force to shatter someone's jaw, causing her to flinch at the reverberating smack, not that he saw. 

She wasn't an idiot; despite getting quieter day by day, she still knew when someone wasn't interested and the fact that he didn't even turn to look at her, said everything. What was the point? Her heart ached at the thought of rejection and, strangely, was tugged towards the gentle giant on the weights bench.

Ray. 

Now, he was sweaty. He was shirtless. He was hot. Shit. 

The thought shocked her as it crossed her mind, the scandalous nature of it seeming so dangerous and forbidden for so many reasons. He was out of bounds, protected by so many rules ranging from him being her employer to her thinking that he was totally not interested. 

If she had learned anything in her six months of working in the Man Cave, it was that Captain Man loved to go on dates as all the magazines said, and whilst she had been disappointed to know that her specialness was limited to being his worker, she'd left it at that. 

She and Drex were happy. Ray was a friend. She couldn't—wouldn't—think like that, not when her boyfriend was a few steps away and beating the fake man so brutally.

"I-I was wondering if you wanted to help me bake that cookie recipe I made. The-The chocolate chip one, I mean, if you want to. I-I just thought it would b-be nice." (y/n) stuttered, a common feature of every sentence she said to him nowadays, her feelings always braced for backlash and his cruel tongue. 

She wanted his affection; she wanted him to be happy; she wanted to be loved because it wasn't like she had proposals coming out of her ears. He had been the first guy to like her since some chemistry nerd back in high school. It was almost like she wanted his approval, even though deep down, she didn't want anything from him unless it was to be left alone.

"No, I don't want to bake any damn cookies. Can't you see that I'm training, cupcake?" He spat, drawing Ray's glare when the coldness permeated the room through the heat emitting from their bodies. 

What the fuck? Baking cookies with her? From a recipe she was so proud of? That was an honour. A privilege. A goddamn dream for him, eating cookie batter and the leftover chocolate as they waited for them to bake, wiping flour on each other's faces. That sounded like heaven to him, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, but here was Drex, turning his nose up at it and biting her head off. That pissed him off.

He probably shouldn't get involved. It was their relationship, their issue, their business. 

But something had been gnawing away at him for a while now and it was getting hard to ignore. It was Drex's rising temper and tendency to lash out. He wasn't blind, he wasn't stupid—well, not much and he could see that something had switched in the guy who should've been his most trusted companion. But the more time they spent with each other, the men found themselves growing distant and more distrustful of each other. 

And now he was hurting the sweetest girl in the world for the dumbest shit, something that boiled his blood. 

"I—I know, babe, but I j-just thought w-we could—"

"No. I'm not baking cookies. Quit asking. Stop being so clingy." 

Ouch. Right. Well. Uh. Error, (y/n) could not be found. The insult cut deep, making her pause as he turned to keep kicking the dummy and that left her to stand there, hands frozen yet shaking, heart thumping but broken. 

Clingy. Clingy—clingggy—cling—cli—he said that, to her face, just then, with utter malice in his tone and spite in his eyes, almost like he'd wanted it to hurt her and slash where it was softest. Well fucking done, he'd managed it; she didn't know how to react, didn't know what he wanted to hear if anything, so she just stepped back. And back again. 

"Right, okay, well, I-I'll be over there, if you n-need me..." She whimpered, not knowing if he could hear her or not over his smacking punches, but he didn't need to. She was retreating to go and possibly have a panic attack on one of the benches at the side of the room and Ray, well, he'd heard enough. 

"Hey, I'm gonna take a breather, pal." He called out to his sidekick cheerfully, acting as though the last three minutes hadn't happened and he shrugged on a grey tank top after leaving his workout bench, deeming it to be unimportant when he saw the tiny figure curled up a few metres away. 

Drex didn't even bother to reply fully, preferring to grunt like a Neanderthal as he continued his assault on silicone, meaning he didn't notice the large man pad across the gym to the crestfallen girl he'd so thoughtlessly wounded, her knees pulled up to her chin like they were shielding what was left of the tattered remains in her chest. He didn't know which approach was best, what words would or could heal the pain, but there was a space next to her and against his better judgement, he took it.

"Hey," Ray said softly, plonking down next to her as gracefully as he could, which wasn't very graceful since he was a six-foot wall of mass, but she didn't mind. Neither did she mind how sticky and searing his skin was, not even when it brushed against her bare arm and made her goosebumps rise. She didn't care about anything at that moment, well, she cared about what people thought about her and if her boyfriend thought she was hanging around too much, then she could disappear. 

That's all she wanted to do, let the ground swallow her up so she could think long and hard about what she'd supposedly done; looking back, she didn't think she'd been clingy at all. In fact, she'd barely seen Drex recently, but rationality didn't help for once. It just made it worse.

"Hi." She whispered back, concentrating on threading her fingers together and checking her nails, anything that meant she could avoid anyone's eyes. They'd see the shame in them and the heartache, not to mention the tears threading to drop and she wasn't one for stealing the attention. Hell, she'd just been called clingy by the guy who meant the world(?) to her, she didn't feel like talking, but when he reached over to hold her hand and rub his thumb over her knuckles, she suddenly found herself being persuaded.

"Why are you sitting here alone?" He questioned, obviously knowing the answer and it felt a little stupid to ask, but he didn't know how to start the conversation properly and it was the best thing he could come up with that wasn't dragging her into his arms and kissing the pain away. 

No, he didn't want that. She was upset because of her boyfriend and whilst he wanted to beat his ass for speaking so viciously, he still respected the boundary. He was a guy known for dragging couples apart and picking through the spoils for himself, but he couldn't do that to her. She was pretty and alluring, but she was also his friend and he'd rather let himself suffer for once than lose that.

"I, uh, just figured that I should get out of the way. You guys need to train for superhero stuff..." She shrugged and tried not to focus on how much her heart was speeding up at his soft touch. Drex was never this tender—no. 

He was just being nice, offering comfort and succour like all friends. He probably held hands with lots of crying girls to get them to cheer up; nothing wrong with that. And besides, boyfriend, boyfriend, boyfriend, the whole reason why she needed a bit of cheer, thinking like that would only end in trouble and a broken heart when both men left her.

"(y/n/n), you are never in the way. Never. I—the team needs you, you're one of us and I hate seeing you so upset." Ray told her gently, stopping himself from saying something he'd regret, but he still spoke honestly and from the heart. 

In six short months, she'd settled in, poked out of her shell, found herself a boyfriend and now, it was like she'd ways been there, smiling and adding a few sarcastic comments to his shenanigans. She fixed stuff, cleaned stuff and his life had never been better, but things were starting to slip. Drex was getting weirder and weirder by the day and she was crawling back into her shell and he hated that.

"I think you'd be all right without me, doofus. There's a million me's in the Tech Uni right now. You could find someone else." (y/n) finally looked up at him, her eyes sparkling with affection for him and mourning for herself. 

She was just someone who'd gotten lucky and just so happened to have a mechanical engineering degree to seal the deal, a combination that could've happened to anyone else, any other girl. Someone prettier, someone smarter, someone who had the backbone she lacked, someone who knew what people liked and wanted. It hurt to admit it, for both of them, her thinking that she was wrong and him thinking that she couldn't be further from the truth. 

"You couldn't be more wrong. You help me, help the team. I don't want some random student from the college. I want my...friend. That's you by the way." Ray smiled, his hands engulfing hers, his hips turning further so his knees were angled against her and the contact made her look up again, but this time, she really looked. 

He looked at her. She looked at him. Boy sees girl. Girl sees boy.  For the very first time.

Blood pumping through their heads muffled any outside interference and she could swear that the walls were closing in again, for a very different reason from before. Since when were his eyes that blue? How could his lips look that soft? He'd said friend and shit, that sucked, more than usual. 

It suddenly occurred to her that her heart had never thumped like this for Drex; he'd never been this kind, soft or encouraging; he'd never been there to make her feel better, never knew when she was hurting, but Ray always did. Sure, it felt awful to think about it when her real boyfriend, the one who claimed to love her when he pinned her down and took what he wanted, was right there, but it was true. 

Ray was better in so many ways and therefore, too good for her.

The superhero could swear that he wasn't breathing. If he was, then he couldn't tell because all he knew was her; the feel of her skin, the way her hair fell in her eyes, which seemed to see into his soul. Since when had pretty truly turned into beautiful? Since when did Captain Man let one girl captivate him so much? 

He meant what he said, struggled to say the f-word, but everything else came naturally. Intrinsically. No one else had ever made him feel so protective and sappy, and he couldn't remember a time when someone had looked more beautiful. Models couldn't compare, neither could actresses and...his sidekick got to have her all to himself. 

Bastard, he didn't even know how lucky he was. He'd give anything to get a chance to kiss her, be more with her, have something real and substantial with her. 

"Hey, cupcake, you gonna make me those cookies or what?" A cold voice rang, making their heads jerk away from each other to look for it and their eyes landed on Drex. 

Shit, he didn't look happy. Macho, alpha, possessive, ready for a fight, that's how he looked and it was all centred on his boss, with only a fraction going on his girlfriend, who instantly slid down the bench and stood up. She had the fucking nerve to blush and he knew who was to blame. 

His damn mentor, Ray "wants every girl to himself" Manchester. 

He was making a move on his fucking girlfriend, he wasn't blind and he was gonna show him who she belonged to.

"Uh, yeah, babe, I'm coming—" (y/n) gave Drex an embarrassed smile, knowing that she'd been caught having a moment with someone else and she only hoped that she nor Ray would face any repercussions, but she never got a chance to defend herself. The sidekick roughly pressed his lips against hers, shutting her up before her reply was even over and she gasped at the sudden intrusion of his tongue into her mouth. 

Honestly, she didn't feel like it was the right moment for a kiss, not when their boss was standing right there and could see every moment, every swipe of their mouths moving together, but that was the point.

Ray gulped awkwardly at the sight and whilst he had seen it plenty of times before, this one was different. It was over the top, too intimate for just a passing fancy as most people would settle for a peck in public and leave a make-out session for a private room, but his bones told him that this was sending a message. Oh god, Drex knew, he fucking knew. He was making her uncomfortable because he knew how he felt for her and he was laying claim to his territory like a damn animal. 

They broke apart with slightly puffier lips, her eyes on the floor as Drex's arm settled on her shoulder and he moved to pull her away, but not before she turned to Ray one last time.

"I'll, uh, see you later, R-Ray." (y/n) stammered and told herself that the kiss was good. Nice. Pleasant. Not all at him pushing her past her limits and her pretending to like it so he'd be happy. Why did he have to be so rough all the time? A little heads-up would be nice sometimes. And in front of others like that? It felt icky. 

"Uh, yeah. Later..." Ray called after them, watching their retreating figures as they headed for the door and he felt like he'd scraped through that one and made it out the other end alive and unharmed. Sure, there was friction, but that had been stewing for a while now; Drex still liked him, right? 

Maybe not; the blind man took the opportunity to look back over his shoulder and glare at the hero, his furious eyes daring him to make a move again and face his wrath, causing Ray to freeze on the bench. 

Yeah, he knew. There was no way he didn't.

They were off to make cookies, something that asshole didn't deserve, but it made her happy, leaving Ray to sit with his thoughts, mainly the ones about Drex knowing how he felt. How did he feel? Six months since meeting, it sure didn't feel like an interest anymore. Neither did it seem like a crush. 

The innocent fluffiness had developed into a soft spot and that had grown into tenderness, which he felt every time he saw her. His heart pounded harder, his thoughts got clouded and every time he saw her, he wondered if she might possibly dream about the taste of his lips as he did hers. That hadn't happened before and he'd fancied hundreds of girls, no joke, so it left him with a startling conclusion. 

He was falling in love with (y/n) (y/l/n), his friend and a taken woman. Fuck. 

~

"Unhappy in someone else's arms." (y/n)'s voice snapped him out of his daydream and suddenly, he was back in the new Man Cave, his new family behind him and the same sweet girl in front of him, but she was so different. She was happier, marked ever so slightly by age and his girlfriend, not Drex's. 

Those memories really sucked him from reality, made his mind wander and his heart sink when he remembered how much of a bad time that was for her, for him, for everyone. Seeing how his eyes grew sad, the young woman knew what he was thinking about, but didn't let it unpick her scars too. She'd made her peace with it a long time ago. 

"I didn't know you felt something so early. I thought it was just me."

"I tried to stay away from you—the relationship, I mean. You were—are so beautiful and I wanted to be the one who got to bake cookies with you because he didn't deserve to look at you, never mind kiss you like he did...still doesn't. But I respected that you'd chosen him and I could never bring myself to deliberately ruin what made you happy." He confessed, holding back his tears since he didn't want them to reflect on the occasion and remember unhappiness and depressing crap. 

"I wasn't happy. Maybe at first, but I think by the end of it, I just wanted to be loyal, not loving...That night, after we made cookies, the night when you two...he told me that he knew how I felt about you." (y/n) gulped before continuing. 

"He told me that I was lucky to have him and that I would never find anyone else who would put up with my shit like he did. He said that no one would want a shy, plain girl with nothing extraordinary to give and that I should've been thankful that he chose me when he could've had any girl he wanted." She revealed, spilling the secrets that she'd kept away from everyone, including him for far too long. 

He knew the rough story and had a vague idea of what had gone down, but he'd never heard his ex-sidekick's exact words and holy shit, he never knew that it was possible to hate him more.

"Then he pushed me against the wall and started shouting about how he didn't want to see me looking at anyone else because he was all I needed, all I deserved. What a dick, right?" (y/n) chuckled weakly, finding it a bit amusing that she'd allowed him to rule her life for so many months and then let his words stay with her for years after, even when he was long gone. 

Never again would she let a man push her around, but she wouldn't have to. She had Ray, the man who'd pieced her back together and treated her softly, so unlike Drex had done. However, she hated that, for a long time, she'd thought she hadn't deserved love and had carried his words like they were chained to her.

"It wasn't your fault, sweet girl. I just wish I'd stopped that bastard sooner." Ray replied, feeling the incredible urge to kneel in front of her as she sat on the chair and pull her into his arms so he could remind her how he was the one in the wrong, he was the heartless one and that it wasn't her fault that he'd lured her in with fake smiles and false whispers. Her sweetness didn't deserve to be soured like that and if anything, it was his fault because he'd waited until something went wrong to intervene.

~

December nights are never pleasant. They're cold, rainy or snowy—miserable until you hit that Christmas checkpoint and the lights come out. But for the first week, everything seems bleak. And everything was bleak in the Man Cave.

Drex was gone, disappearing into the wind and rain after a heated argument that had shattered the peace and shaken the walls, but not before shaking his broken girlfriend even more. 

Her heart wouldn't slow down, her breathing wouldn't break and her pulse was rocketing as she felt her cheeks grow wet but she couldn't find a way to wipe the tears away. Her arms weren't hers, her legs wouldn't move, and everything felt numb. That's how Schwoz found her after investigating the bellowing roars that echoed their way to his bedroom.

That was ten minutes ago and she'd been sobbing into his shoulder ever since he'd asked what was wrong and she spilt the whole truth, his arms rubbing her back soothingly. 

Schwoz knew that he wasn't the one she needed, but he didn't know where Ray was. He must've heard the argument, the screaming, the pleading from the girl for her boyfriend not to do what he was gonna do - it was impossible not to - but he had still yet to show his face. (y/n) needed the comfort only he could provide because he had grown to be her best friend, not that they'd realised it yet, but they were close. Close enough to make Schwoz question whether Drex was really the one for her.

"Hey, hey! Why's everybody shouting in my Man Cave?" Thank god that annoying voice was here. 

Ray came trotting down from the sprocket once he'd decided that his curious nature couldn't wait any longer, and he tiptoed out of his bedroom to see where all the noise was coming from. 

It had all sounded rather angry and raging and not something he'd usually poke his unwanted head into, but then, everything had become so quiet and still, he couldn't stay away from it. And he was so glad he hadn't because the sight that greeted him on the couch made his mouth grow dry and his heart clench.

Schwoz looked up at him; by God, the expression on his face was nearly the most shocking thing in the room. Nearly. 

Now, Schwoz would never be known for being grumpy; in fact, he was one of the most easygoing, weirdest guys around and he loved cracking jokes and making faux pas, so to see him with a deadly serious face was striking. His lips were a straight line, his eyes weren't laughing and when his gaze returned to the sobbing woman in his arms, that's when Ray saw the most shocking thing.

Her body was rocking from the force of her gulps for air and every sob shook her frame, a terrible thing he'd never experienced before. Sure, he'd seen her sad and cry after burning her finger on a soldering iron, but that was nothing a hug or one of those dumb romcoms could solve. This was very different; this he didn't know how to solve. 

Everything he knew made her smile paled when he paired it with her grief, so all he did was carefully move down the stairs, minimising the ruffling of his clothes since the situation felt too delicate for noise, except for his soft whispering. "What happened?"

(y/n) said nothing, merely shook her head like the explanation would kill her if she told him, but really, the sobs were the thing stop her from speaking, choking up her throat and silencing her. 

She couldn't tell him, it would break him to know what she'd caused and even if it seemed selfish, she didn't want to be cast out, so she just stared at the damp patch she'd made on Schwoz's overalls. The genius knew that if it were hard for her to tell him then telling Ray, the man she idolised and adored, would be near impossible.

Gently pulling away from her, he coaxed the fragile girl into slipping her hands into his, which made her sleeves ride higher on her arms and that's when Ray saw the bruises - the product of Drex's anger and his holding of her wrists too tightly.

His heart stopped, genuinely skipped a beat and not in a good way. The thing he couldn't wrap his head around was how she'd come to harm; his friend stayed in the Man Cave where she was always safe from his enemies, madmen and anyone else with a cruel personality and standing guard with her was him, a goddamn superhero, and Drex, his sidekick, who was on the brink of making his crime-fighting debut. Schwoz didn't really count as a protector, but he still cared. They all did, right? So where had they come from?...

"(y/n/n), I need you to tell me what happened," Ray said slowly, coming to kneel in front of her just as Schwoz had and his hands laid over hers. Their warmth melted her panic; despite the shiver that ran through her body when his fingertips ran over the purple skin that had bloomed halfway down her forearm and the worry in his eyes stunned her, she still said nothing. 

"It's okay. You don't have to be afraid. Just tell me who hurt you, and me and Drex will hunt them down."

The mention of that name made another tear slip down her face and Ray didn't know if that was good or bad. He guessed bad. He didn't want to assume, but he knew the shouting was about something. Something had been up with his sidekick recently, but his heart wasn't ready to give up on the guy he'd picked to be his companion, so he managed to persuade his mind that all the shouting had been Drex's outrage, his horror at finding out his girl had been hurt by someone. 

Yeah, that was it; he wasn't around, not because he was a cruel, heartless bastard who'd left the sweetest girl in the world to cry alone, he had gone out to bring the guilty one to justice, a little rash, but Ray could understand. He wanted to go rip someone apart too, but he couldn't imagine who it really was. 

Schwoz knew that (y/n) wanted to protect Drex, and keep their team or "family" together, but honestly, what they had wasn't a family, not when one of the central figures had committed an atrocity and cracked the foundations. 

"That's the problem, doofus. He's not here...because he's the one who did this." She whispered in a hoarse voice, feeling the words burn whatever was left of her heart...and her love for him. 

How could she love Drex now? She could lie to herself as much as she wanted, tell herself that everything was okay and it was just a bad mood, but that was dumb—really fucking dumb and when she looked down at the marks he'd given her in anger, they just screamed at her that it was over. Thank fuck for that. 

"W-what?" Ray gasped, refusing to let his fingers tighten and make her injuries worse, but he was still growing pale and breathless, similar to how Schwoz had but much, much worse. 

Drex, her boyfriend, his sidekick, the one who was supposed to love her, keep her safe, protect her from anything that could upset or harm her, had done this? His mind was swirling with confusion, but mostly anger at how he could break every rule in the boyfriend book and lay a hand on the sweetest girl in existence, the girl he'd sell a kidney for if it meant he got to have one day with the privilege of being her lover. He was desperate to get a second glance, yet there he was, giving her bruises. What the actual fuck?

"I-I don't don't know, he's just been so angry lately, darker if that makes sense. Every night I can hear him talking about how they'll all pay and then nothing will stop him... Not even Captain Man." (y/n) explained quietly, seeing the way the muscles and tendons in his arms flexed and tensed in tandem with the twitching of the vein on his temple, two clear signs that his fury was growing. 

Oh god, was that because of what she'd confessed? His silence fanned the flames of her panic and she stumbled to add an explanation, believing that that was what he was waiting for. 

"Please, I don't want to get him in trouble, but I'd never lie to you."

"It's okay. It's not your fault," Ray mumbled once the gears in his head finally whirred to life again after their brief short-circuiting. He wasn't sure what was in his head, didn't know if it was wise to run off pure rage alone, but the fear on her face and the way her cheeks had grown splotchy from dried tears and smeared mascara was enough to spur him into action. 

Before he knew what he was doing, he leaned forward and planted a firm, loving kiss against her forehead before standing up, meaning he didn't see her blushes or how her mouth ghosted a smile.

"Schwoz, stay here, keep (y/n) safe. I need you to look after the place while I'm gone." The hero stated, drawing a stoic "aye" from the genius as he put his hand on the woman's shoulder, watching as he saw an idea form behind his steely eyes. He never thought it would come to this, never thought that he would have to do what he was planning on doing, but it had been coming for a while and if Drex wanted a fight then he could have one. He gladly give him a beating for what he'd done to the woman he...liked.

"Where are you going?" (y/n) asked, following his movements with tired eyes and wondering why he was heading for the tube pads with his gumball tube in hand. 

No, he couldn't leave, he couldn't go. Drex was out there, purposefully looking for a battle, but he looked so determined. He was indestructible. No one else was; if anyone could take him on, it was Ray, who'd come out unscathed, but that didn't mean the sight of him going was any easier. He was special to her and she was only just seeing that...

"I'm gonna go stop that bastard, so he can't hurt you or anyone else ever again," Ray growled, pausing briefly before shoving a gumball in his mouth. Just looking at her gave him the courage he needed to go fight his equal in strength; even after sobbing her heart out, hair and face messy, she was so damn beautiful and he knew that he'd take on the whole world if it meant he could keep her safe. 

She'd be okay here and he could either come home to her and nurse her wounds or somehow die knowing he did his best trying to be the kind of man she deserved. Either way, she'd be safe and that was his solemn promise.

~

No one spoke. Silence hung over everything, threatening to crush the moment and all its preciousness. 

The teens had never known the full story. They'd only been given tidbits of the darkness that lurked in their past. They were troubled just as much as the adults were, finally knowing the extent of the damage done by Drex, which added another reason to the pile of why they hated him, and for a good, long while, the group stayed silent. Each of them reflected on the past and how it resounded again in the present only hours ago when they lived part two of the nightmare.

"Y'know, that was the night I realised I was falling for you. I knew I'd felt things before, but when you ran off to go beat him up, I couldn't stop it anymore." (y/n) was the first to speak, recalling the same night with a slight frown that morphed into a fond smile when she recalled how the bitterness turned sweet. 

It would be a few more months, maybe a year before she realised that she was fully head over heels, never to fall out, in love with him, but that was the first time she truly felt the fluttering that only comes once in a lifetime. The fluttering of finding your soulmate. 

"Anyone who'd drop everything to go and face that insane monster is crazy...and the one for me, even if it did take ten years to finally say it."

"I was terrified you didn't feel the same way," Ray mumbled with a smile, remembering the utter terror that ran through his past self whenever he thought about confessing. Just the memory made his palms grow sweaty against the box, but then it was eased by the memory of the day when he came out with it and received the answer he'd only dreamed of.

"I was too. You were the hot, older, more outgoing boss and I thought you'd never look at me that way." She chuckled, recalling how she'd spent nights groaning into a pillow at how her heart wouldn't let her useless, pointless love go, believing Ray saw her as a mere friend, or god forbid, a sister. 

Little did she know that he was in a similar situation two doors down, trying to tell his mind to stop thinking about her and go to sleep since it was looking for love where there was none. (y/n) saw him as a mere friend, or god forbid, a brother. 

They always ended up with her feigning a nightmare and hopping down the hall to sneak into his bed. He pretended to be annoyed at having to scooch over, but his petty complaints were silenced when she snuggled into his side and settled in for sleep. Then, they always woke up in a tight embrace, his lip brushing her forehead whilst she practically laid on him with her entire body. 

They couldn't sleep unless they were together. Hadn't that been a clue on how they both felt?

"I think I've always known that I love you. Even when we first met, I felt something I'd never felt before and I kick myself every time I remember a moment where I could feel how much I love you but I never said anything" He said, having thousands of memories, but somehow, the mundane ones stuck the most...

~

"Mi vida, te necesito! Maria, I love you!" The man onscreen shouted at his mirror, not caring if his neighbours thought he was weird. He just needed to get it out into the open and it proved highly entertaining for the viewers, namely being, (y/n) and Ray. 

Well, she was watching, he wasn't, not really; firstly, it wasn't his kind of movie, secondly, she was lying in his lap and thirdly, he much preferred to take the golden opportunity of playing with her hair. Years had passed since Ray had fought Drex and scraped a win, crawling home battered but alive and in all that time, they had only fallen deeper in love. Now, they were central to a proper family, who were all waiting for the moment when they saw just how much they loved each other.

It was her natural movie-watching position, stretching her legs and torso out along the couch, which left her head on his legs and his hands with one place to go, her silky locks. She was busy giggling at the crappy jokes filtered into the plot every five seconds and that meant that she was distracted from the dreamy look on his face and how it took every fibre of restraint he had not to bend over a trail of kisses from her temple and around to those lips, which were probably even sweeter than he imagined from the popcorn she'd been snacking on. 

Ray didn't care about the rom-com. It was dumb, really fucking dumb, something about two office workers or maybe two nuclear reactor researchers; he wasn't sure, but either way, they were stupid and she was way more interesting. 

He didn't know how one person could be so perfect, it shouldn't have been possible and he didn't know if it was possible to be in love with a moment, just them together. It didn't matter; he was in love with her either way. That's all he knew. 

It was dangerous to wander in his thoughts, he often got lost in them and he was terrified that his mind might go on autopilot and do or say something he'd regret, but he couldn't help it and secretly, she was thinking the same. 

Fuck, his fingers felt so good scraping across her scalp and she was trying to stay awake as they dragged through the tangles and knots, causing her to shiver. 

She often wondered if there was any possibility that he could feel the same, dared to let her heart dream and reach out for his, only for it to stumble when he turned to someone else and then another someone and another and so on. It was a fantasy, so as always, she delved into a fabricated romance to satiate her need for it, her eyes refocusing on the movie as Maria and Rafael flirtatiously bantered at the photocopier. 

"Do you think those two are stupid?" (y/n) asked, chewing slowly on a piece of popcorn as the lead woman blushed and batted her eyelashes, but when she got no answer, she was suddenly distracted again. How had he not heard her? 

Little did she know that Ray had been telling himself not to kiss her exposed shoulder after sweeping her hair to the side, the unblemished skin shimmering under the light from the TV. When she called his name softly, his mind snagged that she'd been talking and he'd not been listening, too caught up in his heartbreakingly unrequited love to realise it. "Wha-what did you say?"

At his stuttering, she rotated her body, turning from her side so she laid flat on her back, the back of her head laying on his thighs so she looked directly at him. He gazed down at her with innocent eyes, hoping that she didn't accuse him of ignoring her because that really wasn't the case, the exact opposite in fact. 

But, thank god, she smiled, causing him to relax; she thought that like the doofus he was, he'd zoned out from the lameness of her rom-com and had been thinking about what they needed to do tomorrow, one of his lucky dates or just stuff in general, definitely not because he was daydreaming about her as she had about him, no way. 

"I said, doof, do you think that Maria and Rafael are stupid for not realising they're in love?"

That made him stop and glance back at the movie, where the workday had ended and the guy was walking his girl home since it had fallen dark and he wanted her safe. He knew what she was talking about vaguely, having kept one ear open since he was a superhero and that's what he had been trained to do, and when he thought about it and saw how Maria gazed at old what's-his-face, he agreed.

"Yeah, they must be. He buys her coffee every morning and she turns down guys to have Chinese takeout at his apartment. They must be really dumb, sweet girl." He grinned, watching as her face contorted into an unreadable expression, making him pray that he'd watched enough of the story to make some good points, which she valued from her viewing partners.

"Oh my god, you have been watching!" (y/n) squealed, leaning up on her elbows and giving him a brief hug, the burn in her core muscles not mattering since she got to feel the slightest stubble scrape against her cheek and neck. The sensation combined with the elation that came from the knowledge that he'd been paying attention and she felt drunk from the ensuing happiness, leading to them giddily laughing with each other as the movie played on without them. 

It didn't matter. That wasn't real, no matter how many speeches Rafael made in the mirror or how many dates Maria turned down because her man was waiting. What was real was the love between them, burning brightly as they laughed at the characters and how unrealistic they were.

"Yeah, they're real dumb." She continued, feeling the warmth in her heart when he'd fed her another piece of popcorn, which led to her hand stroking his cheek, rubbing over his cheekbone with such fondness it made him want to close his eyes. But he didn't want to miss a single moment either. "I mean, who can't tell when someone's that in love with you?"

Oh, the irony.

~

That drew some laughs, most of them coming from Schwoz, Henry, Jasper and Charlotte as they teased the adults for being so dumb and ignoring all of the advice and incessant encouragement they'd given them over the years.  Schwoz had suffered the longest, watching the ember grow into a blazing inferno that warmed the entire family, but the kids had suffered the worst of it, seeing how desperate they'd grown towards the end and that had rubbed off on them, but all's well that ends well for them to end up together, even if they had been basically laughing that the movie versions of themselves.

"I'm glad we told each other in the end, though. I was gonna explode if I had left it any longer, sweet girl." Ray smiled, the long, lonely nights becoming worth it since he now had her in his bed at night, not just because she had a fake nightmare, but because she belonged there. He belonged there. It all felt completely right like it had been written in the stars.

"Me too, doofus, me too..." (y/n) shared his pleasant gaze, not even noticing how tight his right fist was clenching or how he had a slight nervous sheen on his forehead, so she just moved to turn the chair back around, plenty of scrolling left for her to do. The trip down memory lane was probably a result of exhaustion, her, him and Henry feeling the strain of post-mission tiredness looming over them and consequently, his mind was losing its ability to constrain the good times as well as the bad. 

But after so many years together, he still knew how to shock her and really, he wasn't tired at all. In fact, he was finally ready to go. He'd had a chance to reflect on how they met, how their love grew and laid dormant and ignored for aeons, but now, he knew how she felt and how he felt; he was ready to say it.

"I know and that's why I'm certain, sweet girl." He called out, making her eyebrows knit together when she heard him, wondering what the hell he meant by that. 

"What do you mean cert—?" Leaving the computer alone since her curiosity had been piqued, she turned in the chair again, rotating one-eighty degrees and seeing the most awe-inspiring, jaw-dropping, goddamn perfect sight that she'd ever been blessed with. 

Using the stealth that a six-foot man could only achieve through years of study and training as a superhero, Ray had taken one step forward, feeling like his legs were made out of jelly, but all the same, he was able to take a deep breath and sink to one knee. He brought the box up to the right height, cracking open the lid to reveal the gleaming ring inside - the tiniest, most delicate piece of treasure and it was all hers if she would take it.

Gobsmacked, speechless, every word in the dictionary could barely describe the thundering of her heart and the barren desert that her mind turned into when she saw him kneeling there, close enough to touch, not that she could actually move. 

All she could manage to do was raise a trembling hand to cover her mouth, concealing her choked gasps and tiny hiccups as tears pooled in her eyes upon seeing the ring, the pure love in his gaze and how he was also on the verge of crying. They were both lost in trepidation, her body shutting down and feeling alive all at the same time, but strangely enough, his hands weren't shaking, the velvet box perfectly level as it hovered in front of her, another trait gained from a lifetime of working under pressure.

The others could feel the buzz in the air, trying not to squeal or jump when it zapped their skin and electrified their nerves, making them want to clutch each other and shout something. They didn't though. They stuck to their promise and stayed as invisible spectators, despite the couple forgetting that they were there entirely. 

The group could've made noise or moved around, but the couple probably wouldn't have noticed. For them, it was just the two of them at that moment, protected by a bubble of love that kept her breathing even though (y/n) felt like she couldn't. The young woman wanted to say something and tried to command her tongue to garble a response or a noise, but she couldn't, leaving him to say everything his heart wanted.

"I had a whole speech planned out for when I finally got the guts to do this but I don't need it. I just know...You're the one for me, sweet girl. Always have been." Ray started, forgoing everything he had written down and practised in the mirror because it was just him and her. No audience, no one to impress, just their little family and he realised that nothing with her had to be scripted. He knew exactly how he felt and what her love meant to him.

"You've done so much for me. Changed me, made me a better man, just by being you and being here with me." He was surprised by how calm his voice was, how it stayed level and smooth despite how his heartbeat seemed to be stampeding through his body and causing everything to seemingly rattle inside of him.

"No one's ever stuck around, but you have. I drive you insane with my crazy ideas and my stupid mouth and sometimes I don't know why you stay but I'm so damn glad you do." The tears were close to falling for both of them, but he told himself that he had to stay strong and keep his voice steady, even though he had long since learned that with her, he didn't need to be tough all the time. Sadness, vulnerability and tears were okay, she taught him that, but still, he had so much left to say.

"What I do know is that I'm not always the man you deserve, god knows you deserve the world, but I promise that for the last eleven years, I have wanted nothing but for you to be happy and safe and loved, things that I thought you couldn't be with me." He had no idea where he was going with it all and some might have said that he was rambling, going off-topic to hide his nerves, but to her, to everyone listening, it was shaping up to be perfect.

"But I want to be the one to give them to you because I love you so fucking much, with everything I've got, no matter who I am. You don't just see Captain Man. You see me...all of me."

"There's gonna be no one else for me. This is it. No one else could ever be my wife. So please, give me the honour...(y/n) (y/l/n), will you marry me?" He asked in a steady, quiet voice, eyes hopeful and feeling like the world was caving in on him as the few seconds passed like millennia, his fingers pinching the ring box so they wouldn't shake too much now that the question was out and his fear was running rampant. 

A tear dropped from her eyes as her trembling hand slowly lowered from her mouth, the emotion and utter surprise of the moment causing her throat to seize up, making him falter for a split second. His heart clenched at the sight of her tears and he took her silence and strained expression to mean that she didn't want this, she didn't want him, fuck it was too soon, he knew it. 

The pristine serenity he'd built around them began to crumble and whilst he regretted the day he thought this was a good idea, she swallowed, lubricating her vocal cords so they'd actually start working and he braced himself for his demise but...

"Yes..." (y/n) said hoarsely, barely able to the two syllables out from how raw her throat seemed to be and the tiny sound made his head snap up from where it had been drooping slightly from what he took to be rejection. His lips parted, one, two, three breaths leaving them before she carried on, her head clear of the tidal wave that had drowned her senses and numbed her brain. "Yes, a million times, yes!"

Her delighted cries snapped him out of his fleeting heartache and his face broke out into a huge grin, childlike and carefree laughter leaving their lips as he giddily plucked the ring from its plush cushion and held it between his forefinger and thumb. Relief and pure, shining happiness flooded him, and his hand reached for her left one as it rested on the edge of the computer's chair. With her loving eyes gazing into his, he brought the delicate band to her ring finger, sliding it down until it snugly reached the base, a perfect fit.

"Oh my god, I love you," Ray mumbled as he stood to his full height, pulling her up with him so their lips could meet in the sweetest kiss they'd ever shared, the tears lowly freely down her face as she brought her hands up to cup his cheeks, the ring's cool gold brushing against his skin. 

Neither wanted to let go, perfectly content to drown in their love and the thought of an entire future spent together until reality crept back in and they realised that they were being given a whole standing ovation, Henry, Schwoz, Jasper and Charlotte beaming proudly as they applauded the scene. 

They'd never seen anything so precious, pure and right, and their cheers and whoops were genuine, their happiness matching that being radiated from the lovestruck, blushing couple, who pulled apart to share the moment with their closest friends, one of whom wasn't taking the emotion as well as the others.

"Henry, are you crying?" (y/n) gasped as she fanned her own wet cheeks and caught her breath. She wasn't close to fainting yet, although Ray would be there to catch her if she did. He'd always be there now, always by her side as it was meant to be. 

His bemused smirk was directed towards the kid, who was furiously wiping the crystalline droplets away, sniffing like nothing was wrong but everyone could see how moved he was, how damn happy he was for the both of them and they understood that. Hell, they were on the verge themselves.

"Nah, man. It's liquid pride. I don't cry..." The boy fibbed, making them all chuckle as Schwoz stepped forward and shook Ray's hand, a few firm shakes exchanged before he yanked the man into a tight hug. A surprisingly strong move for one so small, but nevertheless, Ray returned it happily as his sweet girl, his fiancée, hugged Henry, Charlotte and Jasper in turn, admiring her newly beloved ring over their shoulders each time. 

It was simple yet detailed and small but beautiful and everything she could have ever asked for, the greatest gift she'd ever received from the greatest man she'd ever known.

"I love it. I love you." She whispered to her fiancé once they'd been congratulated fully and allowed to return to each other's arms, the diamonds sparkling under the blinding lights as Ray ran his thumb over it. It felt so right that it was on her finger, a promise between them that they were gonna make the ultimate commitment and he couldn't wait for that. Why had he been so afraid? This was bliss...

"I can't wait to marry you, sweet girl," Ray told her earnestly, lifting her hand to kiss the ring as she teared up again and stepped closer, pressing herself against him completely like she needed his warmth to live. All these years and he could still floor her, make her ball her eyes out and find something new to love. This man...her Ray, the one she had waited a lifetime for through heartache and hardship, now she just had him and their love, perfect.

"I can't wait either, my handsome doofus." She replied, smiling as she kissed him again to more applause, her safe in his arms as their family celebrated their love. They laid down their teasing and faux annoyance just this once, inevitably going to return to it once it had sunk in, but the moment could be left alone for a while because they didn't want to groan. They didn't want to roll their eyes or retch; they wanted it to always be like this. 

Just them. Those two. Those lovey-dovey idiots. Ray Manchester and (y/n) (y/l/n). Captain Man and Miss Danger. Fiancé and fiancée. The hero and his helper.

[bisluthq]

Is it all over between you and FG or would you make another go of it?

I answered this a few days ago but I post a lot so also acknowledge things change lmao and the short answer is I’m fairly confident we’ll be making another go of it. I said to him I’d like to do visitation once I’m moved in properly and he said he’d really like that and… this evening actually he messaged me to ask if I’m home and moved in lol. And I said not really (true) and I’m not home (very true, I’m at the cinema). He then told me he’s at the beachfront (which is like 10 mins from me as opposed to 30 mins where he/we live/d). I’m confident he was vying for a “pull in and visit” invite but like I can’t yet because I haven’t fully moved in and… I’m out. We took a few days off talking last week and then he told me his friend is visiting town and will be staying at the house as her accommodation plans fell through (this is very standard for this chick, she’s stayed with us before under the same circumstances) so I kinda left him alone lol while he’s entertaining? But ya tonight he surfaced with a meme, which I laughed at because it was funny, and then tried to score an invite to my place seemingly (because also he grey ticked me the minute I said like “no I’m at the cinema and it’s still a moving/construction process”) so idk.

we’re obviously both not done yet. Either we both have not been hurt enough - and are sekrit masochists because seemingly we have a bottomless desire for pain from one another - and we need to get SO hurt that we legitimately cannot look at the other person OR we need to work through the overwhelming fucking remainder of the romantic feelings and be friends because we really get along sooooo well. Fucking most fun, interesting and compatible person with me I’ve ever met.

we cannot try with the pre-existing conditions tho. For either option lol like even if we’re gonna wind up fucking with each other even more profoundly - impressive - like we cannot just go back to how it was. We need to figure out a new way forward (which we’ve now charted, I’m just not set up for it yet).

So basically no we’re not done and we both know that but how it WILL end is still unclear.

Last night Sam was asking me about this and also pushed regarding if we’re monogamous or not (I suspect for selfish reasons because I suspect like he was pondering if he should try harder than the jokes at the same time I was cognizant of how I only want the jokes) and as I said here before like… yes, formally per both of us we are. I obviously don’t have a fucking ankle monitor on him and even if I did like I wouldn’t know who he takes home to blow him lol and he doesn’t have a fucking ankle monitor on me and if he did he wouldn’t know if I hooked up with someone. So it’s genuinely just trust. Which would be absolutely shattered if either of us “cheat” rn (it’s not fully cheating but it’s not not cheating lol) and maybe that’ll make it easier for us both but also back to above lol like we’re so fucking fixated on one another and fucking batshit insane (me clinically, him like… I mean he’s stressy depressy and kind of weird but like he’s not on meds for crazy and does have a therapist so one assumes he’d know if he were so he’s just WEIRD) that I personally can’t imagine fucking going on a date or taking someone home currently and I do believe he’s the same. Sam tried to tell me last night he’s prob not but…. Lmfao I shared my heartbreak about him playlist with him and he wrote back with thoughts of how the songs apply to him too soooo… no. We’re just both a little psycho and very very deeply in love but also, I acknowledge, fucking the worst thing that can happen to the other person.

we both actively make each other worse people lol and prevent the other person from achieving their goals/visions but we also unfortunately cannot get over this just yet lmao and maybe we can stop the fuckery and just be happy?

and like I’m well aware that if he makes another attempt to see me tonight while he’s 10 mins away, I’m 90% confident I’d say yes even if it’s with the annoying friend and even if he’s drunk (he is likely gonna be, he mentioned they Ubered to the beachfront - again I think trying to score an invite - and knowing him like he’d only Uber if he planned a big night). I’d still go.

but also I have boundaries and pride so like no my place is not ready, no I don’t want to see HIS version of Susan, and I’m sitting smoking at the cinema and people watching and blogging so 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

and I also have a dinner plan like I know what I’m gonna order so that’s also important and I don’t want fucked with. But I’d obviously let him fuck with my plans if he made a proper effort to. "Wreck my plans, that's my man" vibes.

[andrewlovely]

The Adjutant and the Collector Part Deux

- So you get the wiretaps in? - Yeah, we got 'em in. We've had 'em in for quite a while now. - Good. So how'd you do it? - What do you mean, "how'd we do it"? - Social engineering? Did ya get some malicious code in there? That's how we used to do it. - God, you're old. No Bob, we didn't "social-engineer it." <rolls eyes> We don't have to anymore. - <pauses> So? - So, what? - So how'd you do it?! - Bob, an American company owns their telecoms now. We don't have to do anything. They have to comply with our requests. - Is that legal?

- It's been legal for some time now. Didn't you used to be a lawyer? - Well I'll be damned... <stares off into distance, then suddenly recovers himself> Uh, yeah... yeah... I used to be a lawyer. But that was a long time ago. - Well I'll tell you what, this guy should've been a fucking lawyer, that's for damn sure. We can't get anything from this guy. Nada. Nothing. - What do you mean, "nothing"? - Nothing we can use. He clarifies every goddamn thing he says. It's like he knows we're listening. - How could he possibly know? - I don't know. But he knows. - Well, maybe Cheri was right. But how do you know he knows? - Well, because numerous times in the middle of a phone call we're monitoring he'll pivot mid-conversation to address us directly.

- What do you mean, "address you directly"? - I don't know how else to explain it, Bob. He'll just start talking to us as if we're all in the middle of a goddamn three-way conference! - How do you know he's talking to you? - Because he prefaces by saying, "and to those listening..." - Jesus. - Yeah. And even other times, it's like... it's like he's not even really talking to the other person he seems to be ostensibly talking to on the phone. It's like he's really talking to us. It gives me the creeps, Bob. - Well, what does he say? - He goes on these diatribes... He makes these... proclamations. It's... weird. He gets quite animated. - How do you know he gets animated? - We have visual. - Cell phone?

- Sometimes. - What do you mean, "sometimes"? - Well, we got cameras in there too. - How in the hell'd you manage that? - Security company. Guys who installed his alarm system. We, uh... "social-engineered" it, I guess you could say. - Ha! I knew it! You see Tom, you can teach a new dog old tricks. - Right. - So whaddya got? - What do you mean, "what do we got"? I told you, nothing. - There must be something. - There's nothing. I'm telling you, this fucking guy knows we're listening. - But how can you know that for certain?

- Bob, you got Alzheimer's or something?! I just told you, the fucking guy tells us, "and to those who are listening"! - God this guy is crazy... - How is he crazy? We are listening! <laughs> - Yeah, but he doesn't know that. - What is this, "Who's on First?" Listen Bob, I- - It's Bill, by the way. - Right. Listen, Bill, we've had this guy's phones tapped for so long now, we've got full teams on his social media, analysts pouring over countless transcripts and multiple data points to maybe try to get a sense, maybe get some kind of a fucking sense of precisely when he became aware of the surveillance, so then maybe we can have a control, and- - We need a new strategy. - Well that's the fucking understatement of the year.

- Listen, my boy, you just need an old dog to teach you some new tricks. - You've really committed to this "old dog" analogy. - It's a metaphor. Listen, we need to scratch up the tapes and punch out the takes. Punch in, punch out. - What the hell are you talking about? - It's an old agency trick. Whenever he starts clarifying something, or whenever he starts saying something that doesn't fit into our narrative, you stop the recording. Then you start it back up again when he gets "back on track." Punch in, punch out. - <sigh> Bill, I don't think you quite understand how our processes work. You can't just muck up the recordings; in any case, the "punch ins" and "punch outs" will be obvious. - They have editing software for that now.

- Well God damnit Bill, I ain't doin' that! And ethical concerns aside, our operations are regulated by Congressional Fucking Acts! We can't just manipulate evidence willy-nilly, and there's no fucking "evidence" to begin with! The guy never says or does anything indictable! You realize the kind of con job you'd have to splice together to- - <Bill suddenly leaps across his desk, splayed out, and cups his hands over the bald eagle displayed prominently in the center> <sprawled out on top of his desk, he begins to whisper, seething> You think any of the shit you're talking about fucking matters in the kangaroo courts they have set up for these poor bastards? Go along to get along, Tom. You know the kind of people I got breathing down my neck? - <whispers back angrily, even more intensely, right back in Bill's face, who's still sprawled out on his desk, face-to-face with Tom> This guy ain't a saint, but he's better than 99% of the fucking people I've ever met in this walk a' life, I can tell you that much. Everything he's saying is true, and you fucking know it!

- <Bill still sprawled out on top of his desk, desperately reaches over sideways behind him and grabs a coat, muffles it over the bald eagle, whispers even more intensely, almost losing his voice, barely able to get out the words> Have you completely lost it? They're gonna send us to Gitmo, man! Get your shit together! - <looks away, defeated> <mutters, almost to himself> I find no fault in this man, Bill. I find no fault in him... - <Bill suddenly recomports himself, taking the coat off of the bald eagle and sliding off his desk, back into his chair. He adjusts his clothing and wipes the sweat off his brow> - <Tom remains dejected, looking down and to the right, at the blue carpeted floor> Well, maybe AI can help us... - There's guys in IT working on that. Compiling recordings of his voice. But we may still be a few years from a convincing reproduction. - Well, as long as it's "kangaroo" quality... - <Bill widens his eyes in anger, as if to give Tom a warning>

- <Tom continues, unfazed> Won't need long for that... - <Bill clears his throat awkwardly> Uh, no... yeah... it... uh... <clears throat and adjusts neck tie> It shouldn't be long.

[aajjks]

DHP!JK

it’s safe to say you didn’t leave him. how could you? he needs you now more than anything, and despite your threat, every time you try to leave, something always pulls you back to him. there must be invisible strings connecting you to him because you swear you can never stay away. while jungkook is in the shower, you go to the surveillance room and notice mi-cha still on the floor wheezing. “how could you do this mi-cha” you say as you walk closer to her body, her neck swollen and eyes bloodshot. “y-y/n” she wheezes out, her eyes filling with tears when she weakly reaches her hand out to you but your arms remain folded. “get your shit and get the fuck out of our house. you won’t ever hear from me ever again” your cold tone sends a pang to mi-cha’s heart. “i hope this shit was worth it, mi-cha. you better be gone when he wakes up tomorrow because next time, i’ll make sure to send you back to mom with your tail between your fucking legs”

with that, you turn around and walk back to your bedroom, happy to hear the shower still running. mi-cha weakly rises to her feet and limps out of the surveillance room. she grabs her stuff from the living room and exits the home.

from mi-cha

i need help

can’t breathe

come get me

she barely manages to make it to her car before collapsing onto the ground.

meanwhile, you change into a short, light pink satin nightdress and style your in a messy low ponytail braid. you check on junseo one last time and turn the baby monitor on before returning to the bedroom. you hear the shower stop along with jungkook’s sniffles. minutes later, the bathroom door opens, and you’re already in bed waiting for him to join you. you know the last thing you need to do is stare at him provocatively, but how can you when he looks so good?

“Yn come cuddle me, please?… if you want to.” you come closer to jungkook and run your fingers through his semi-wet long locks just the way he likes before “Ew what the fuck? Yn my pillow is so fucking sticky.”

you look over his shoulder and notice a wet patch on his pillow. you gasp “what the hell?? get up” you pull jungkook away and pick his pillow up with two fingers. “if this is what i think it is, she’s a sick fuck” you get up and head to the pantry to grab a trash bag. once you toss it in there, you return to the bedroom and pull the blankets, sheets, and pillows off do the same with the blankets, sheets, and pillows.

“i bet that crazy bitch humped your pillow. look through your stuff and see if she took anything”

~🫧

He’s getting livid again because he hate people. He doesn’t trust touching his stuff and she fucking humped his pillow.

He’s so disgusted right now he might even throw up, but he is trying his best to compose himself for you because he doesn’t want to make you feel like he’s getting angry again because he doesn’t want to be that person especially not in front of you

As you ask him to look through his stuff, he does so when he notices some of his underwear gone, and when he looked through his jewelry, he notices some of that gone also

He looks at you and you’re actually getting angry too. He sees himself being mirrored in your face.

“Ugh I think I’m gonna go tomorrow and file a restraining order against her. I should’ve done this a long time ago. How the fuck did I not think of this?” he walks back to you and takes you into his arms before laying down on the bed.

“I’m sorry baby. It’s my fault. I don’t know why she’s so infatuated. I never did anything to lead her on or enable her behavior.” He climbs on top of you and caresses your cheek.

You are so beautiful and you are all his.

His fingers trail lower and lower until they’re on your stomach he gently massages the skin. And his gaze turns even more sultry.

Especially when it settles on your lip.

“Can I… can I please make love to you yn? I promise I will be gentle, I need you so badly baby, please? I just wanna feel close to you and even though I don’t think I have the right to do that after what I did, but I really fucking need you.”

He dips his head lower as his mouth trails hot open mouthed kisses onto your neck and collarbone, he’s so gentle and careful with his touch but there is a sense of urgency in his kisses.

“Please? I promise tonight will be all about your pleasure.”

[hellstobetsy]

Hussie himself explaining why he eventually stopped that insane schedule:

Let me put it this way. You may work a full time job. It may be that something happens in your life that makes your job more difficult, because you are preoccupied. Your work may suffer to some extent, but you can still approximately match what's expected of you, because there is a partition between your job and your home life. You may nevertheless feel your full time job seems to dominate your existence, saps your energy, and leaves your weekend respites feeling all too short. This is not an experience I share, because MSPA is not a full time job. If you have such a job, then I would have to RADICALLY REDUCE my workload to match your level of day to day preoccupation. The actual quantities involved have always been nebulous and I never made a point of keeping track, but 12 hours per day seems like a pretty reasonable average, since that is just shy of all waking hours. Time spent writing, drawing, animating, or just spacing out at my monitor while contemplating all the moving parts. This is what I did every day, including weekends and holidays, for two years, and to some extent another year prior to that with Problem Sleuth. Only a few weekends were missed due to conventions, and there was a single week off immediately following the infamous "robo smooch", and that's it. (Most of that week was spent wondering why the hell I wasn't updating…) There are other gaps in the archive, spanning days or a week, when I was animating. Those spans involved the usual work schedule, while simply omitting sleep! Not only is this an unreasonable workload to expect of anyone, it's practically impossible to pull it off. Maybe you can expect some committed guy out there to really buckle down and duplicate that effort for a month or two. But years? Too much can crop up in the white noise of normal life to destabilize it. Momentum is absolutely crucial for maintaining that kind of pace. I find that if I only do an hour of work in a day, I get ten minutes of work done. If I do 12 hours of work, I seem to get 24 hours of work done. This is especially true of animation. Such projects notoriously take a very long time. I feel like because of the crazy head of steam I've built up from years of nonstop effort, I can knock out in days something that might take another animator a week. Or in a week what might take a month. Without that momentum, it's not possible. Starting up Flash cold is excruciating. Getting your head back into the stride of a story wastes energy you wouldn't use if you never broke stride. Without the momentum, the pace reverts to ordinary. Getting distracted by life destroys the momentum. I've been pretty zealous about deflecting the distractions, even when I move, as I often do. A notable example was last year when I came back from the Emerald City con in Seattle, and found my apartment flooded. The con was already enough of a time sink, so I didn't have much of an appetite for going into personal crisis mode. I just kind of shrugged, picked my computer off the lone, miraculously dry part of the floor, dropped it in a temporary residence, and kept drawing. I think the flood mess occupied about a day of my attention, whereas something like that could easily take up weeks of your time and energy if you're living that "normal life". You know how it is, you come home and find water up to your ankles and go aw fuck, what's ruined, what needs replacing, gotta call whoever and deal with the fuckin landlord about stuff and auuuugh. I just didn't bother with any of that, because it just didn't seem to matter, and I preferred to keep working and not give a crap about all my soggy bullshit. And in retrospect, I guess it really didn't matter.

It's always a trip seeing post-Homestuck webcomics try to emulate Homestuck's narrative structure without understanding that Homestuck's narrative structure only worked because of its extremely rapid update schedule. Like, yeah, you've got the whole elaborate acts-within-acts thing going on, but your comic has been running for nine years and you just hit the halfway mark on Act 1; I think maybe some reassessment is in order!

[evieolo]

hi! so i had a fluff fic idea?? idk if uv seen how nick and chris call matt "miserable matt" on the pod and stuff but it genuinly makes my heart hurt for him...but like maybe in the fic its after they film the pod and they tease him abt his bad mood the whole time and he acts strong but he comes downstairs after and cries about it to the reader and she has to comfort him about it? obviously u dont have to but i rlly miss the fluff fics, tumblr needs more!!

Miserable Matt — Matt Sturniolo x Reader

Word Count: 1k

Miserable Matt, Miserable Matt, miserable Matt. Every damned time he speaks, the words coming out of his mouth are ‘too sad,’ ‘too depressing,’ or something that, as Nick so loudly claims, ‘nobody wants to fucking hear about.’

Matt is having a particularly bad day, making everything Chris or Nick does even more grating than usual. He is growing increasingly overstimulated with every excursion they pull him into after deeming him the designated driver without consulting him. But who is he to say no? Instead of getting to catch up on much-needed sleep, he gets called a fun killer sixty times by Chris, who barges into his room, wakes him up, and demands a trip to the mall.

On top of all this, you are busy. The one person who doesn’t make his brain feel like it’s on fire is at work meetings all day, from six a.m. to six p.m. All he keeps telling himself is that he just has to finish the podcast episode, and then he gets to see you. But god, Chris and Nick are seemingly intent on testing his patience.

The topic of the podcast is "The Science of Happiness," but soon veers into the exploration of nature, a topic Matt revels in.

“Matt, you’re always reposting videos of trees and shit on TikTok, what's the significance?” Chris asks, pulling Matt out of his looping thoughts.

Matt adjusts the mic, pulling it closer to him and shuffling in his seat to get settled before he speaks. “I really like nature because of how calming it is,” he gushes, a passionate smile draped across his expressions. “If I’m ever really sad or something like that, being detached from people like that really calms my nerves,” he says with complete candor. He is content with his answer until Nick mumbles two words into his microphone.

“Miserable Matt,” he laughs.

Chris nods, joining in with the bantering laughter. “Detached from people is crazy,” Chris jeers, obviously getting a kick out of this. He and Nick banter back and forth for a good while until Nick brings himself back to seriousness and waves at the camera. “We’re cutting that part out. I don’t need to see any more edits of this kid being all miserable on my For You Page.”

Matt sighs, trying to hide his disappointment. He isn’t quite sure what emotion he’s feeling, but the buildup from being frustrated and tired all day makes him push the microphone away from his face, subtly enough so Chris and Nick won't notice, and lets them carry the conversations for the remainder of the night, only chipping in at times he feels he won’t bring the conversation down. All he can think of is three things: the amount of times he’s cursed Chris out, the amount of times he’s sighed, and you.

When Nick starts closing up the video, Matt can’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. He can’t help but clench his jaw when Chris butts into the outro, saying yet another dumb joke.

When the camera monitors turn black and the cameras shut off, Matt nearly skyrockets out of his seat. He snaps his hands against his thighs and sighs, “We’re done?” he questions. Nick and Chris look at each other, then to Matt. “Yeah, we’re done.”

Matt staggers downstairs lightly, passing by the empty merch boxes and large sofa on the ground floor.

You shift your head, hearing the tapping of his footsteps against the tile floor. “Matt?” you hum softly in question. You spot his bright blue Fresh Love hoodie and piece together that it’s him coming down the stairs.

“Matt, do you want to get food now?” you ask, recalling his previous requests that Nick and Chris have denied. Matt bites his lip in an attempt to stop a flood of emotion. “No, I gotta go to the bathroom,” he mutters, lying through his teeth. His voice is hoarse, and this gets your full attention on him.

You turn to him, throwing your arm over the sofa’s armrest so you can pivot in your seat, giving you easier access to see his face.

He shies away almost immediately when he realizes your eyes are on him. “Matt, what’s wrong?” you ask, shuffling from your seated position, nearly hurdling over merch boxes to reach his area.

Matt shakes his head. “Baby, you can talk to me,” you urge, palming his cheek with your cupping hand. Matt swallows harshly, a tough swallow - the kind that hurts your throat, all because of sadness.

“I-I’m not miserable, am I?” he asks, his posture slumping.

Your face drops at his self-accusation. He takes this as an end to your question and shrugs your hand off of him. “Why are you with me if I’m miserable?” he asks, teary eyes half on display.

“Matt, you’re not miserable,” you sternly say in a voice both demanding and childish.

You pull his arm, gesturing him to the sofa. He sits down dramatically and pulls you into him. You yelp at the sudden movement. You’re on his lap now, straddling him in the most non-sensual way.

“Nick and Chris say I’m miserable,” he sulks.

You kiss his lips - a little quick kiss before speaking. “Nick and Chris are wrong, Matt. They're just teasing you.”

Matt nestles his head into the crook of your shoulder. “It feels bad, though,” his voice is small and mumbled.

You feel the wet drip of a tear onto your neck and lace a finger through Matt's hair. You know this is where he wants to be, how he wants to be. He doesn’t like showing his face when he’s emotional, happy, or sad; that’s just how he is.

“Hey, you went on that zip line at the zoo, right?” you ask. Matt hums in agreement, nodding his head slightly. “If you were this miserable fun killer you think you are, you wouldn’t have done that.”

“I guess,” Matt mumbles, muffled by the fabric of your sweatshirt.

“Matt, look at me,” you say. He raises his head slightly, just enough for you to cup both cheeks in his palms. “Just because you’re not at six hundred percent all the time like Chris is doesn’t mean you're miserable, baby.”

His lip quivers a bit at your sentiment, and you continue, “You’re perfect like this, Matty. I think if you were as energetic as Chris, it would be like babysitting, not dating you.”

Matt laughs, and his chest rumbles against yours. “Yeah, Chris is a big baby,” he mumbles. You bite your cheek, stifling your laughter. “I’m staying out of your sibling fights, baby.”

Matt hugs you tightly, wrapping his hooded arms around your torso into a borderline painful bear hug.

“I love you, Y/N,” he mutters. This is probably the loudest thing he’s said tonight.

You knot your fingers through his hair and kiss his forehead. “I love you too, Matty.”

Ten seconds later:

“What if he calls me Miserable Matt again?”

“Then I’ll bitch-slap him.”’

A/N: in about five days once I forget this ATROCIOUS piece of “writing” exists trust that I want no reminders that I wrote it

Ily thanks for sending in a request

[hardstraykidshours]

skz at a new years eve party

pairing: none, just ot8 skz

genre: headcanon, 18+ (minors dni)

length: 758

warnings: alcohol mention, this isn't honestly too nsfw but please just don't be stupid with alcohol

chan

chan is the ultimate party dad. he's not drinking, because he is monitoring everyone else. he also makes sure everyone stays the night. even though the party is at his place, he's the first one in bed. no matter what, the second the ball drops at midnight, he is going to his room and going to bed (except for that one year where he played a ball drop stream from a different time zone and went to bed early).

minho

minho stays most of the party, but this is the one time he isn't drinking. this is because when chan isn't looking, he irish exits the party around 11:30, so he can go home and spend new years with the cats. he steals a noisemaker from chan's party and takes some party hats for the cats. they all watch the ball drop together. even dori.

changbin

changbin is drunk almost the entire party, and he is so fucking loud because of it. he also ends up eating basically all of the snacks, like literally sitting on the couch with a whole bag of chips and the entire crockpot of buffalo chicken dip. if he runs out snacks, someone better walk to the store or a riot (of just changbin) will break out. he is felix's partner in crime until felix sobers up. he is also trying to kiss literally everyone at midnight but gets rejected by everyone.

hyunjin

hyunjin gets drunk really early on but hides it really well. he goes to the bathroom 2 hours in and stares at himself in the mirror for 10 minutes because the room is spinning. this makes him decide to sit on the couch in the corner for like an hour or two until he sobers up enough to rejoin the party. he knows seungmin is on the prowl for people doing stupid shit, so he's hyperaware of where he needs to be in order for it to be safe to mingle again. he insists on everyone drinking fancy champagne at midnight, but he ends up yelling at changbin for wasting it by spraying it all over people.

jisung

for some reason, new years is jisung's favorite holiday. he takes it very seriously. he even has those obnoxious glasses that look like the year number. chan may be the host, but it's jisung's party. he is dancing and drinking and socializing the whole time. jisung is a beer pong master, and he is trying to convince every person he sees to play. (he also made jungle juice in the bathtub even though chan told him he wasn't allowed to do that ever again since the jeongin incident last year).

felix

felix gets super drunk really fast, like shit-faced in the first hour and a half of the party. he does not handle his alcohol, so he definitely makes some regrettable decisions in this timeframe. chan has to cut him off, and once he starts sobering up as the night goes on, he realizes everything he did and how seungmin got all of it on video. He got so drunk so fast that by midnight, he's already low key hungover while everyone is just now starting to get drunk, so once the ball drops, he takes some ibuprofen and sleeps in chan's room since chan has already snuck off to bed anyways, so it's the only quiet, dark room right now.

seungmin

seungmin spends the majority of the night gathering embarrassing dirt on everyone. if someone does something stupid while drunk (or sober quite frankly), he has a picture or video of it. he also has a note on his phone categorizing every moment for each person based on how good of blackmail it is. because he's so focused on this, he really doesn't drink much most of the night, but the moment midnight hits, he is going crazy with the shots and will probably be blackout by 1:30.

jeongin

jeongin is just there to have a good time and will basically go with the flow of whoever he is hanging out with at that time. he has major beginner's luck with beer pong and wins every game, so jisung is constantly trying to get him to play. he clearly did not learn from his mistakes of last year, and he drinks waaaaaaay too much of jisung's jungle juice and is violently hungover for 2 days. like it's so bad that he doesn't even leave chan's couch for those 2 days.