#this was supposed to be a serious blog

[theelegantmentalist]

What would you do if Xeno whispered in your ear mihoy minoy

If Dr. Xeno Houston Wingfield leaned I n all dark and brooding and fucking whispered "mihoy minoy" in my ear?

I’d lose structural integrity instantly. Knees? Gone. Panties? Ghosted. Self-respect? Never heard of her. I’m popping my husband stitch like a champagne cork at an orgy. Don’t ask how it got there just know it’s gone now, and so is my last shred of dignity.

He says it in that low, gravelly voice and suddenly I’m bracing myself on the nearest desk, begging him to whisper “are ya ready kids?” while he rearranges my insides and drops his kids off in my ass. He’d better be ready because once this magician drops the act, I’m not pulling a rabbit out of the hat. I’m pulling his soul out through his dick.

You sure Xeno didn’t hear minor minor? I heard he likes to email the little boys.

[ynnie631]

I shifted I FUCKING SHIFTED

The little bunnies were sniffing me, they were nibbling my ear.

The birds were calling me, singing songs that soothed me.

And someone was caressing me, their hands were soft and gentle. They were GROUNDING ME.

UNTIL MY MF FAMILY DECIDED IT WAS TIME TO BLAST BASS MUSIC ALL OVER THE HOUSE, PLAY THE PIANO AND BE LOUD AS FUCK

Now of course, I STOOD my ground. I affirmed, focused on the sensations and ignored these bitches.

But the bass kept getting louder, it threw me off and now I'm here. IM FUCKING HERE.

Are you serious? I shifted, I DID. I'm genuinely so upset, i hate them so much

[bethanydelleman]

Listen, I know that you can't take anything Trump says seriously until suddenly you do, but a world leader cannot joke about the sovereignty of another nation from a nuclear superpower and neither can a nation like mine ignore clear threats of annexation, so

Dear US Americans,

In case you weren't aware because your media lies to you, Canadians do not want to be American. It's actually our whole thing. You can pry our sovereignty from our cold dead hands. I am completely serious, we did a poll and it was 90% opposed.

The vast majority of us would rather die than become an American state. If there is an attempt to annex our country, we will become the Ukraine to your Russia and the world will be on our side.

Sincerely, Canada

P.S. Canada unequivocally supports Ukraine

P.S.S If you think it's in poor taste or something to compare Canada's situation to Ukraine's, well I really hope that you are proved right in the end

[onlytimlexfan]

Issue 3.5 if Alex was nonchalant

[leroiestmortvivelareine]

Do Browning and Towns call each other 'Agent' when they kiss

[pastadoughie]

6-25-25 || Made in Microsoft Paint (W10) Otonashi Ayana from Wonderful Everyday (she/her)

shoutout 2 all my schizo bitches

alts under cut

+ rough process 4 ppl who go "ough how do in msapint", I Did record it tho. So. Maybe ill edit it and upload that at some point.

[10hourshift]

Evil touys 😈

I lost the og concept I had for them so I remade them last night

Why do they exist?

They're filler characters for the contest (I have a lot of those :/), and go against the toys in the first round. The toys realize their team is kinda ass when they see how well the Evil toys perform and get along with each other. The toys then instead of trying to improve as a team fight and their relationship strains a little (btw their team completely falls apart at the end of the contest)

Reasons their team works:

Gloom is the leader, and White Bon is the first one to support her.

They're all committed to the contest bc they know they are all important for the performances.

When they lose (bc they lose against the toys) they don't get angry and are happy they got to enjoy that experience with their friends 😄 (corny af but that's the point)

[gifti3]

i have a tier list in my head of characters that i really like that goes like

soulmate, husband, boyfriend

and im adding a fwb and friend tier to the list

soulmate - asmo (this one feels obvious 🐸)

husband - orion, bruno

boyfriend - grim, flea(?)

fwb - griffin

friend - aoba

[prismbearer]

Idk why there's disbelief over Mark S/Helly in terms of motivation. Helly is just as capable of cruelty and selfishness as Helena. They are at the core of it, the same person with different memories/experiences. They can be two perspectives worthy of indulging their own dreams and desires and also be the same person. Narratively here especially, this isn't about morality, it's about human nature.

Helly was never cruel, sure, of course. Helly felt like she was the same as the other people in MDR. But Helly has something right now that she never even achieved as Helena. Someone who loves her. Someone who is choosing her. Helly is Winning over Helena here.

Jame Eagen wanders down just to be a freak and reinforces the reality of it. Helly is "More" than Helena, hasn't been worn down by the weight of experience and the world (and their cult and corporate bullshit). She still has, in some way, the innocence of youth and lack of experience with the world. She doesn't have the same fears and burdens or triggers as Helena in her conscious experience. She still has the ability to express her passions and outrage and defend herself. And to love and not feel sorry for it.

Severance gave Helena a chance to exist without the learned perspectives and burdens of the Eagens and she is able to be free with herself and her passions and desires-- whereas Helena was likely drained of any dreams for potential beyond a strictly guided future decades ago.

Of course Helly is feeling a rush of joy and satisfaction over Mark loving her. Mark choosing her. She tried to do the "right thing" by being logical with Mark. "I'm her." Even outside of Lumon, if they bring it all down, there's no hope for an Eagen and an ex-severed employee in reality. In the Real World they will never be together. Mark couldn't love Helena, how could anyone love an Eagen? (Poor Helly really with like, the enemy is within etc, but that's kinda the situation framed by Lumon for everyone by setting the stage with your Innie isn't human kinda rhetoric.) (This was also reinforced by Helena trying to get close to Mark to see if he still had feelings or chemistry with her and finding out they were not going to work outside Lumon.)

What if the equator is a building that could be a continent? Can be their whole world? They're choosing to live Now. Together in the present despite knowing that with their half lives, they could be brought to an end at any moment. It's very willful young love of them. And why wouldn't it be? This is their First Love. They haven't even been "alive" that long or have any memory of romance beyond their current infatuation. They don't know the world or it's places, and maybe that's okay, maybe they can exist in this space so long as they have love and the others.

It's completely human for Helly to accept Mark choosing her. To run to him just to see him for maybe the last time. It's human for Mark S to run to Helly. It's human for poor Gemma, who doesn't even know her fucking husband is severed, to be pounding on the door.

But this is their Final Day to Mark and Helly. Maybe the very end of their world. It's Judgement Day. Of course they'd have them holding hands and running back to the unknown to face the end together. To die together.

There is also zero fucking chance Mark Scout would risk his life and brain continuing reintegration once his wife is back. Mark Scout is going to choose his wife. Mark is choosing Love on both sides here.

All of it is reasonable.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,

if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."

i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,

i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason

[rozewrites]

[selfship-confession-box]

to be quite honest. shipping with CANON (not headcanoned) exclusively gay/lesbian characters as someone of the gender they are explicitly not attracted to is a form of erasure and lowkey homophobic. 'just make them bi' is a bad take. bi people are amazing and valid but not everyone is bisexual??? 'theyre not real' is a bad take bc representation matters and i feel like that doesnt really need to be said. obviously the character isnt real and isnt offended but gay/lesbian selfshippers can see how much you dont gaf abt their identities. gay people exist in real life too!!! homophobia is still so acceptable in fandom spaces and its kinda wild.

Actually this one gets to skip the queue because we just had another anon push their luck about this. I WAS originally going to leave this in queue but now feels like a better time to nip this in the bud.

This is the LAST thing I'm saying about this topic because frankly it's the majority of what we've been getting recently and it's exhausting. All future asks about this topic WILL be deleted. AS STATED ABOVE. DO WHAT YOU WANT FOREVER. YOUR EXPERIENCE IS YOURS AND YOURS ALONE.

TAKING POTSHOTS AT EACH OTHER IS NOT A CONFESSION.

THAT'S CALLED BEING AN ASSHOLE.

k thanks bye

[meowdei]

Realistically someone being jealous of selfships would happen rather early on in a relationship because I can’t imagine being with someone for years before finally going on yeah! Btw I love these characters! I think it’s a situation that would be addressed rather early on if it arose because your partner would know early on what your interests and hobbies are and I simply wouldn’t be compatible with someone who cannot grasp the difference between fictional love and real life tangible love so. It wouldn’t work and I wouldn’t really be willing to spend time trying to convince them to accept a selfship

[jellobubblelol]

fuck it, Broozette

Happy April Fools, folks!

I spent almost 4 hours on this shitpost y'all better appreciate it-

[toolshedstool]

getting into a new fandom is waaayyy scarier than it used to be tbh. in my most recent fandom before sp (which im still mostly in, my hyper fixations have just shifted around) i made a lot of dark content, and got messages accusing me of crimes and trying to guess what type of abuse i'd been through over it. can't remember if i personally got suicide bait and/or threats to my well-being, but i saw mutuals get them and that sort of stuff genuinely scares me. i also just have anxiety in general so that doesn't help lol. idk, shit feels so hostile, especially if you aren't interested in keeping up with whatever rules that cyberbully circles make up.

[a-vibing-potato]

3 AM and I'm falling asleep while I play Roblox and think about Jim Hopper from Stranger Things. The vibes are impeccable, I'm calling it. Good night, everyone <3