#totally not based on that one couch meme..

[sinfulpatata]

happy belated bday LWJ!

someone save this man from the twinks..

+ closeups:

+ the most superior version of wwx...

[kaiyunsim]

guilty—

pairing : best friend!ni-ki x male!reader

summary : you invite ni-ki over and things get kinda hot inside…

warnings : fluff, maybe slightly suggestive, idk ni-ki is shirtless, based on guilty performance

a/n : i WOULDVE used the guilty pics but i just saw these pics and really like them. also probably not taking requests like this anymore cuz i don’t really like writing them… (sorry)

queueing : guilty - taemin

[requested]

— wc : 2.2k — not proof read —

it's not like inviting ni-ki over is weird. you guys are friends. close ones, even. you talk all the time, send each other dumb memes, argue about the best gaming strategies, and hang out like it’s the most natural thing in the world. so this shouldn’t be a big deal.

except it is.

because having a massive, painfully obvious crush on your best friend tends to make things complicated.

when you text him to come over, it takes him all of two seconds to respond with a casual yeah, be there soon, like it’s nothing. because to him, it is nothing. but to you? it’s an hour of trying to calm your racing heart, of overthinking everything, of pacing around your room and wondering if your place is clean enough, if you should change your shirt, if you should act any different than usual (no, that would be weird, right?).

by the time the doorbell rings, you’re already a mess.

you take a deep breath, shake out your hands, and open the door like you weren’t just standing there having a crisis.

ni-ki stands on your doorstep, grinning as he swings a convenience store bag in one hand. “yo.”

“hey,” you say, proud of how normal your voice sounds.

he steps inside like he’s done a hundred times before, kicking off his shoes and heading straight to your couch. he moves so comfortably in your space, like he belongs here. which, in a way, he does. you’ve known each other long enough for this to be second nature, so you really need to pull it together.

“i brought snacks,” ni-ki says, plopping down onto the couch and digging into the bag. “oh, and these.” he tosses a pack of your favorite candy at you.

you barely catch it in time, blinking at him. “you got this for me?”

“yeah?” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “you always steal mine, so i figured i’d get you your own.”

you want to scream into a pillow. instead, you swallow and mumble, “thanks.”

“no problem.” he leans back, stretching out his long legs. “so? what’s the plan? are you finally ready to accept that i’m the better gamer?”

you scoff, grabbing the controllers. “you wish.”

the game starts, and for a while, everything is normal. you fall into your usual rhythm. trash-talking, shoving each other when one of you pulls off a cheap move, laughing whenever ni-ki yells at the screen. it’s easy, familiar, and for a second, you forget about the whole i have a ridiculous crush on my best friend thing.

but then ni-ki shifts next to you, knee knocking against yours, and just like that, you’re reminded.

you try to focus on the game, but it’s impossible when he’s sitting so close, when his fingers move effortlessly over the buttons, when his face lights up in triumph every time he wins. and god, he’s so pretty. it’s not fair.

“dude, you’re losing so bad,” ni-ki teases, nudging your shoulder. “what’s up with you today?”

“nothing,” you lie, gripping the controller tighter.

he squints at you. “you’re acting weird.”

“no, i’m not.”

“you totally are.”

“just play the game.”

he shrugs, turning his attention back to the screen, but the damage is done. you’re spiraling again, overthinking every little thing, and before you know it, you’ve lost another round.

ni-ki stretches his arms over his head with a satisfied sigh. “man, it’s getting hot in here.”

you barely register his words before he reaches for the hem of his hoodie and pulls it over his head in one swift motion. underneath, he’s wearing a plain t-shirt, but then… then he tugs that off too, leaving him in nothing but his sweatpants.

your brain short-circuits.

he doesn’t even hesitate. just tosses his shirt onto the couch like it’s no big deal. “that’s better,” he sighs, shaking out his hair.

you, on the other hand, are not better.

you are not fine.

you are actively malfunctioning.

your mouth opens and closes a few times before you manage to choke out, “what are you doing?”

ni-ki blinks at you. “taking my shirt off?”

“but why?”

he gives you a confused look. “because it’s hot?”

“you can’t just—” you gesture wildly at his very bare, very toned torso, “—do that!”

he frowns. “why not? we’re both guys.”

and logically, sure. there’s no reason for this to be a big deal. but logically, you also shouldn’t be hopelessly in love with your best friend, and yet here you are.

your face is burning. your entire body feels like it’s on fire. ni-ki is still looking at you like you’re the weird one, and you know if you stay here any longer, you’re going to say or do something humiliating.

so you do the only thing you can think of.

you run.

“i need to—uh—get something,” you stammer, practically launching yourself off the couch.

ni-ki watches in confusion as you bolt to your room, slamming the door behind you.

he stares after you for a moment, then shrugs and picks up his phone, completely unaware that you’re currently on the other side of the door, having an actual meltdown.

you press your back against the door, heart pounding like you just ran a marathon. your hands grip at your shirt, trying to ground yourself, but it does nothing to stop the sheer chaos in your brain.

ni-ki is in your living room. ni-ki, your best friend. ni-ki, shirtless.

you squeeze your eyes shut, willing yourself to calm down. it’s not like this is the first time you’ve seen him like that. you’ve been to the pool together, changed in locker rooms after practice, but something about this is different. maybe because it’s just the two of you, in the privacy of your room, where your stupid, hopeless crush feels ten times heavier.

you shake your head aggressively. get it together. he’s just a guy. a guy who doesn’t even realize what he’s doing to you.

outside, you hear ni-ki shift on the couch, probably wondering what the hell is wrong with you. you know you can’t stay in here forever, but the thought of going back out there, of sitting next to him while trying to act normal… it makes your face heat up all over again.

you take a deep breath, then another, pressing a hand to your chest like that’ll somehow slow down your heart rate. okay. you just need to play it cool. pretend like nothing happened. act like a normal, sane person.

with one last deep inhale, you push the door open and step out.

ni-ki is still on the couch, legs stretched out, casually scrolling through his phone. he looks up when he hears you, tilting his head. “dude, what was that?”

“what was what?” you say way too quickly.

ni-ki raises an eyebrow. “you, running away like i just said something weird.”

you force out a laugh. “i didn’t run away.”

he just stares at you. “you literally ran.”

“i—i needed to, um, check something,” you mumble, walking past him and pretending to be very interested in adjusting the snack bags on the table.

“...right.”

you can feel his eyes on you, and it takes everything in you not to combust on the spot.

“you good?” he asks after a moment, voice softer.

“yep. totally fine.” you turn back to him with what you hope is a normal expression. “let’s just keep playing.”

he doesn’t look convinced, but he shrugs, grabbing his controller again. “alright, if you say so.”

you sit down next to him—not too close, just enough that it doesn’t seem weird. ni-ki doesn’t seem to think twice about it, immediately starting the next round. but you? you can barely focus. your eyes keep betraying you, flickering to the curve of his shoulders, the toned muscles in his arms, the way his collarbones shift whenever he moves.

it’s ridiculous, really. he’s not even doing anything. he’s just existing, and it’s driving you insane.

you suck in a sharp breath, forcing yourself to look at the screen. focus. focus on the game. not on ni-ki’s stupidly perfect body.

“hey,” ni-ki says suddenly, breaking you out of your thoughts. “why are you playing so bad today?”

you blink, realizing you just drove your character straight off the track. “uh.”

he laughs, nudging your knee with his. “you’re totally off your game, man. maybe i should take my shirt off more often if it distracts you this much.”

you choke.

ni-ki looks at you, amused. “...wait. is that what this is about?”

panic. pure, unfiltered panic floods through you. “w-what? no! obviously not! why would—why would that distract me? that’s so dumb. you’re dumb.”

ni-ki squints at you, his grin growing. “oh my god. you’re flustered.”

“i am not flustered.”

“you totally are.”

“shut up.”

he laughs again, and it’s so unfair how effortlessly good he looks doing it. he leans closer, a teasing glint in his eyes. “i mean, it’s fine if you are. i am pretty good-looking.”

you want the ground to swallow you whole. “i’m going to throw you out the window.”

“uh-huh.” he smirks, and it’s infuriating. “so you don’t think i’m hot?”

your brain short-circuits for the second time that night. “what?”

“you heard me.”

“i’m not answering that.”

“so you do think i’m hot.”

“ni-ki.”

“it’s okay, i get it.” he leans back, smug. “i’d have a crush on me too.”

your soul leaves your body. he says it like a joke, like it’s nothing, like he has no idea how dangerously close he is to the truth.

you grab a pillow and smack him in the face with it.

he bursts out laughing, dodging your second attack. “okay, okay! chill!”

you groan, slumping back against the couch and covering your face with your hands. “i hate you.”

“no, you don’t.”

you peek through your fingers, glaring. he’s still grinning, completely unbothered. and, worst of all, still shirtless.

you exhale slowly, trying to gather whatever scraps of dignity you have left. “put your damn shirt back on.”

ni-ki smirks, stretching his arms behind his head like he’s enjoying this. “nah, i’m good.”

you gape at him. “what—ni-ki.”

he grins, tilting his head. “what? you were the one acting all weird about it. now i feel like keeping it off just to mess with you.”

“that’s literally the worst reason.”

“or the best.” he shrugs, completely unbothered. “besides, you never actually answered my question.”

you hesitate. “...what question?”

his smirk grows. “do you think i’m hot?”

you make a noise that’s half a groan, half a dying animal. “i’m not answering that.”

“so yes.”

“so shut up.”

he laughs, absolutely thriving off your suffering, and flops onto the couch like he has no care in the world. “guess i’ll just stay like this, then.”

you stare at him, horrified. “you’re evil.”

he grins. “and you’re flustered.”

you grab the pillow again, ready to smother him with it.

ni-ki smirks, leaning further back into the couch like he has all the time in the world.

you stare at him, exasperated. “ni-ki. put. your. shirt. back. on.”

he raises an eyebrow, clearly enjoying your suffering. “hmm. no.”

“why not?” you huff, crossing your arms.

he shrugs, completely unbothered. “kinda nice seeing you all flustered. didn’t know this was all it took.”

you groan, feeling your face heat up again. “you are the worst.”

he grins. “and yet, here you are, still staring.”

you snap your head away so fast you might get whiplash. ni-ki laughs at you, full-on cackles, and you swear you’ve never been more embarrassed in your life.

he stretches lazily, arms above his head, on purpose, you know he’s doing it on purpose now. “so,” he says, looking at you with a glint in his eyes. “you got a crush on me or something?”

your stomach drops. your breath catches in your throat.

and ni-ki? ni-ki just smirks like he already knows the answer.

you could deny it. you should deny it. but the way he’s looking at you, teasing, but also strangely expectant, makes you hesitate.

after a long pause, you exhale sharply, rubbing the back of your neck. “...maybe.”

his smirk grows. “maybe?”

you roll your eyes. “fine. yes, okay? i like you. happy now?”

he hums, tilting his head like he’s considering something. “hmm. yeah. i think i am.”

you blink. “wait—what?”

he grins, leaning forward slightly. “would’ve been nice to know earlier, you know. would’ve saved me all this effort.”

you gape at him. “effort? what effort?”

he shrugs, like it’s obvious. “the effort of making you admit it first.”

you stare at him, speechless. “you knew?”

he laughs. “not really. but i hoped.”

your brain short-circuits. “you hoped?”

he just winks, and finally—finally—grabs his shirt off the couch. “now that you’ve confessed, maybe i’ll put this back on.”

you groan, shoving a pillow in his face as he cackles. this is not how you expected today to go.

[lightsoutmatthews]

hi :) so happy for you hitting 250 followers!!! i have a request for auston so it can for sure wait until your done with the celebration fics lol. but i was wondering if you could write something based on the song packing it up by gracie abrams. just something cute about auston and reader not looking for something serious but then they cross paths :,) thanks!

Packing it up – Auston Matthews

word count: 1.5k

pairing: Auston Matthews x female!reader

warnings: none

authors note:

you know I always love to write for my favorite hockey man

part of my 250 followers celly

---------------------

You weren’t looking for anything.

That was the agreement you made with yourself the night you decided to move back to Toronto.

The job was solid, the apartment was temporary, and your heart? Officially under construction, maybe forever.

After one too many almost and one too many too-long, too-wrong relationships that left you feeling like an extra in your own life, you were done signing up for things you couldn’t return.

When one of your girlfriends dragged you out for a birthday party downtown – some NHL guy´s thing – you made it clear that you were just there for the free thinks and maybe the cake.

What you weren’t prepared for was Auston Matthews.

He wasn’t what you had expected from someone whose name kept popping up in conversations and headlines. He didn’t carry himself like someone who cared about all that.

He was calm, friendly and lowkey, like he wasn’t interested in being the center of attention, even though people kept trying to hand it to him.

You had meant to avoid small talk and to stay on the periphery but somehow, you ended up on the balcony with him, watching the city lights, a half-warm beer in your hand.

“I´m not usually a fan of these things,” you admitted, a little too honest.

He glanced over. “Same. I usually sneak out after thirty minutes, but it´s hard when it´s your name on the cake.”

You snorted. “You´d think being a hometown hero would come with more perks. An exit plan maybe.”

“Working on it,” he chuckled. “Are you from here?”

“Born and raised but I left a while ago and just came back recently.”

“Why?”

“Honestly? Needed a reset.”

He nodded like he got it and maybe he did.

There wasn’t a spark, not at first. Just ease and mutual understanding. Like talking to someone you´ve never met but kind of already know.

You kept it light. No exes, no big career dreams, no dramatic stories. Lighthearted talk of music, your mutual hatred of overpriced cocktails and shared appreciation for late-night pizza.

At the end of the night, he didn’t ask for your number. You didn’t offer it either.

It felt perfect that way.

-----------------

Two weeks later, you ran into him again. total fluke.

You were at a coffee shop near Queen, head buried in your laptop, trying to pretend you weren’t about to miss a deadline, when someone said your name.

You looked up and there he was standing. Hoodie, cap, sunglasses pushed up like he wasn’t trying that hard to hide.

He smiled, and this time it felt different. More familiar then on the balcony.

“Do you live around here?” he asked, casually.

“Sort of. I like working here.”

“Mind if I sit?”

And that was it. No flirting. No big moment. Just two people who didn’t really want to be seen, finding each other.

---------------

It started small from there.

You had exchanged numbers at that second meeting. You would text sometimes. Memes mostly. A bad pun here, a link to a song there.

You never talked about feelings. Never crossed any lines that could be interpreted as anything other than two people being friends.

You were just orbiting.

He would swing by sometimes after games with two containers of takeout you would eat on your couch while you watched trash TV.

You didn’t talk about it. Not to your friends, not to your family. Your heart still guarded but somehow it still started to feel like something.

---------------

One night after a win, he showed up with that look in his eyes. Tired but happy.

“I don’t want to be around people,” he sighed.

“Come on in,” you mumbled, letting him settle on your couch like he belonged there.

That night you fell asleep next to each other, fully clothed, with some of sitcom playing in the background.

When you woke up, he was still there.

And that scared you a little.

--------------

At that point you tried to pull back.

You told yourself it was getting blurry. That you weren’t supposed to feel warm when his name popped up on your phone. That this wasn’t what you signed up for.

You deleted a few drafts of messages that said things like “Hey, maybe we should take a step back” or “This is getting too real” but never sent them.

Because every time he texted, it still made you smiled and when he showed up, he always made you laugh.

You weren’t in love. You weren’t even sure you wanted to be but he made it easy to forget why you were packing up your heart in the first place.

--------------

One night he caught you off guard.

You were at your place, finishing dinner after one of his games, when he looked at you and said, “You´re kind of my favorite post-game tradition now.”

You blinked. “Don’t say stuff like that.”

“Why not?”

“Because it´s not supposed to be like that.”

He didn’t push, just looked down at his plate, then said “okay”.

But something shifted after that.

---------------

You tried dating someone else, briefly. A guy from work. A safe and normal option. He liked hiking and spreadsheets not scoring goals and winning games. He texted you good morning and good night every day.

He didn’t make you feel like Auston did when you caught him humming along to your favorite song or when he remembered how you took your coffee or when he reached out and squeezed your hand during a particularly bad day just because he knew.

It ended before it started.

You didn’t tell Auston.

You didn’t need to.

---------------

Late spring came fast. The Leafs exited the playoffs in mid-May. Your job was stabilizing. Your apartment felt less temporary and yet, every time Auston came over, your brain ran in circles.

He starched out on the couch like he belonged there, making comments like “You know you snore, right?” and laughed when you threw a pillow at him.

But he never crossed the line.

Never kissed you.

Never asked for more and neither did you.

It was all unspoken, like both of you were too scared to see what would happen if you said the quiet part out loud.

At least until one night.

You were watching some dumb cooking show, sitting too close for two people who were supposed to be “just friends”. He looked over over at you, eyes soft, voice low as he spoke “Do you ever think maybe we´re avoiding something?”

You didn’t look at him. “Like what?”

He didn’t answer, just let the silene settle.

Maybe that was your answer.

--------------

A week passed. Then two.

He didn’t text, neither did you.

You missed him more than you wanted to admit. Not because of some grand romantic thing but because he was your favorite part of the day. The person who made everything a little less heavy.

Still, you held the line.

You weren’t looking for something serious. That was the rule.

--------------

On a random Tuesday he knocked on your door.

You opened it confused.

“I was in the neighborhood,” he explained.

You raised an eyebrow. “You live twenty minutes away.”

He smiled. “So, I took the long way.”

You let him in. He looked around like he hadn’t been there for years not a few weeks.

“I missed this,” he mumbled.

“Me too,” you whispered in reply.

He looked at you, mor serious now. “Can I ask you something?”

You nodded carefully.

“What are we doing wrong?”

You hesitated, your heart skipping a beat at his question. “I don’t know.”

“Because I keep telling myself that this is nothing and that we´re just hanging out and I shouldn’t feel this way about that.”

You swallowed and nodded in agreement.

“But I do,” he said firmly. “I do feel this way.”

You looked at him, really looked at him and realized maybe you had been lying to yourself the whole time because you felt it too.

Even if you didn’t want to. Even if you weren’t ready. Even if this was the scariest thing you had done in a long time.

Still, you said it, quiet but clear. “Me too.”

He kissed you once that night, a promise of more to come but not overstepping whatever just happened between you two that night.

You didn’t crawl into each other’s arms like a movie ending after that. You sat on the couch, side-by-side, hands brushing, your head falling onto his shoulder and finally let yourselves be in it.

It still wasn’t serious, not yet, but it was real, the beginning of something that would eventually turn into more with time.

You had guarded your heart carefully, you didn’t expect him to come into your life and claim it with the speed of one of his slapshots, but you weren’t mad.

You were content with this and whatever the future would hold for the two of you.

[dirtyoldmanhole]

using this from @kidlightnings as a selfship meme :P sfw/nsfw questions under the cut!

note: some of these answers may make far less sense without the brighteyes/zihark lore/timeline essay i typed up here over on dreamwidth (especially since i imagine they're involved in both FE10 and FE:Heroes. you don't have to read given it's long, but fair warning ~ this is also all crossposted on dw.

SFW questions

Do they have petnames/nicknames for each other? Is there a reason why not, or a reason they picked what they did?

zihark (even in canon) tends to tease more with witticisms and backhanded compliments verses pet names ~ i think pet names are a touch too kitschy/maudlin for him.

on the other side, bright eyes knew she was fatally fond for him when shit like 'my love' slipped out completely unironically much to her horror :D that said 'zi' as a shortened version of his name is the most frequent way she refers to him ~

Who cooks? What's their favorite thing to cook?

zihark cooks since she's horrid at it, and doesn't even try to resist when he metaphorically elbows her away from the counter. :3 the logistical timing honestly works too given she's usually occupied with hours-long mage-work for pay (tellius) and/or constantly held up at strategy meetings (askr).

when he's gone on his occasional long diplomatic/mercenary trips he'll leave behind little prepared lunches. ;u; the first time it happens it totally takes her off guard and melts her heart ~

i'd say both of them in general prefer lighter portable foods - fish, rice, vegtables, sushi-esque type of rolls. i get the sense food is one of his minor ways of showing affection since he's gone out to restaurants before and makes a point of paying.

Are they ok with PDA? What counts as public to them? Are there levels?

they're both quite reserved/have a peculiar sense of piscean detachment when it comes to outsiders, so not really.

that said - notably, when he can tell she's about to make a very bad tactics call on an emotional instinct and lets the mask slip in anger (quite rare; the amount it's happened can be counted on one hand), he'll lay a hand on her shoulder from behind. and then she'll snap right back to the ever-pleasant-charming mask. it's quite unnerving to those who witness it, almost like a glitch.

What level of pain/sickness are they comfortable showing each other? Is there anything they hide?

endearingly, way back in early Radiant Dawn she knew she was down bad for him and there was Something from his side too when he had the flu and he let her fuss over him and stick around longer than was strictly necessary for platonic "old friends" :3

bright eyes is pretty pragmatic/independent when it comes to sickness/(recovering from regeneration-spirit-charmer powers); having been invalid for so long means it's a natural instinct to try to quietly minimize the amount of help from everyone. he's remarkably courteous about being sensitive to it.

Are they the marrying types? Or something else?

yes, post-RD by a few years :) i kinda go back and forth if they marry again in heroes-verse (or do some kind of re-commitment ceremony); most likely yes if they stay there for more than ten years.

If they lived together, whose name(s) goes on the lease/mortgage?

bright eyes! mind you, zihark's good with paperwork (and she passes it off to him quite frequently lmao) but she came with more resources and more of a home-base mentality wheras he's always more the wanderer. give him a couch much less an actual bed and he's grateful for that alone and doesn't have a habit of asking for beyond that. (a bad habit of his, she thinks. more reason to spoil him.)

that said heroes-verse when they've been together for a while, i do see him purchasing a small little studio away from everything. generally as a safe house-slash-place for him to retreat in his moody spells, but it eventually becomes a getaway for them both.

Is there any early bird/night owl split? How do they deal with it, if so?

annoyingly he's the early bird of the two by far :p that said, watching him get up and dress makes bright eyes a lot more amendable to cracking the eyes open to begin with, something he mercilessly uses to his advantage ~

Do they have hobbies that take up a lot of space? Is this ever a problem, if so?

he keeps an incredibly small footprint (able to travel on a dime with just his sword, bright eyes never understands how he does that).

she on the other hand, always has more stuff she's attached to -- most notably a library of books, but she always has a residence in general to keep them, even if it's long term storage. mage-work takes up a workroom as well, but sanaki/anna pays her well enough that's not an issue. :)

that said, i think zihark would genuinely have fun in askr developing an antiquing/furniture restoration hobby at her encouragement ~ by then it's pretty clear they're not needed to be on the road as much so he's gradually little less frugal as he gets older and feels safer to put down roots.

Who slams the oven, and who plays the trombone? ( https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/when-mama-isnt-home ) Is it a trombone, or a different instrument?

skkjkjjhajka. bright eyes = oven, him on the trombone, absolutely.

Who can keep plants alive? If nobody, who has the best rate of success?

bright eyes is like the personification of death/decay (both cheekily and also significantly thematically), so hell no :p zihark would be able to handle a plant with instruction given he's detail oriented, but he wouldn't be around with regularity to start it, and he'd question the commitment.

Are they in agreement over shoes off or shoes on inside?

i feel like this is more cultural than individual, for some reason ... honestly i see them having their 'marching/muddy boots' but then a general pair of shoes for domestic stuff. like..... his boots are gorgeous. shame not to see them indoors just sayin'. :)

Do they stick to fairly fixed roles in their relationship, or is it flexible?

oh this is funny since i've been thinking about this in more detail for the last few months. it's interesting - early on in RD when they were just genuinely getting to know each other, they were settling in comfortably in a bodyguard/employer dynamic, and a lot of their life roles extends from that.

he's always been a hired sword and even after that initial stint (where i headcanoned that tauroneo was the one who hired him for her), she's had the resources to keep him on indefinitely. not solely as mercenary protection - she's quite physically/medically frail given the whole spirit-charmer-pact and the downsides there; there's a few notable times when she's been bedridden. on his side - stability's always been an illusion since timeline-wise he would have grown up right in the worst of Daein's plague and likely moving from place to place for money, and ideals when it was possible. having that guarantee - and frankly, a certian kind of rare, open emotional non-judgementalness from bright eyes that he doesn't see elsewhere - makes him inclined to stick around.

and later as she learns a little more about him (headcanons, here), there's a .... strong desire? to ensure that he's never ever left financially vulnerable again or coerced by an employer.

(...somebody needs to tell bright eyes that getting romantically involved with your gorgeous bodyguard is the definition of coercion. :p) (the fact this plays into similar sketchy themes as the askr contract isn't lost on me)

that said it honestly works out for both of them. he's got some of his own sketchiness in that he likes playing with subtle control/coercion/'i have the upper hand even when it doesn't look like it as a kink' vibes right back(i swear i wrote an essay on this somewhere??) behind a pleasantly bland pretty smile, so it's very much a grey-area-mutual-winking-knowing-dependency..... Thing.....

(alphonse is a little grossed out when he figures it out, he's no dummy lol.)

Who would take up more of the closet? What do they have the most of?

oh zihark, unquestionably. :p man's a peacock. honestly both of them are quite sparse in the "quantity" of clothes but he would absolutely hold himself to a higher degree of quality and something for different occasions wheras she takes on the steve jobs mindset of 'one iconic outfit for everything because my god i do not have the fucking brain for this shit'

NSFW questions~

Are they particular about where to/not to have sex, like nothing on food prep surfaces, only in bed, nothing outdoors? If so, what are the rules? Are they in agreement about said rules? :3

"nothing in public" was one of the original.... agreements...... except funny thing is they both keep getting awfully close to skirting that rule. :p

i think zihark specifically has a low key thing for it. cough. anyway. alphonse does not want to know how many times the war table and/or the summoning stone has been utterly defiled right before a meeting. :3

or as @kidlightnings said on that last one: 'between a rock and a hard place' lol

Are sex toys something casual, or reserved for special occasions, or not used at all?

toys, nah.

objects on other hand like, uh. sheaths/boots/swords? :)))))c

given the next strip late on this year has a strong chance to be sword-cleaning-with-the-most-obvious-bootblacking-overtones?

i'll let you guess ~

How about roleplay? Casual, or something that would be meticulously planned out? Can they stay serious during it?

nah, not really a thing for either of them -

Do they change the sheets after sex, or just avoid the wet spot?

he's fussier about being clean and sensory details and not messing up the nice sheets so the Fuck Towel is a thing as a easy compromise.

he rolls his eyes every time she calls it that :D

How pressed do they get if the other doesn't orgasm during sex? Is it personal?

nah, not at all. for bright eyes it's wound up far more in the act of service/intimacy, and just by the ahhh, mechanics of it, he's usually satisfied either way.

on his side he's patient enough to figure out what makes bright eyes tick, and she's a much easier puzzle than some than he's dealt with. :) his nose alone. jesus. ahem.

Would they be bothered by a pet walking into the room?

lol. nah. a pet jumping on the bed would merit the critter getting nudged off ungracefully with a leg (and the door closed afterwards) but that's about it.

Are they comfortable being intimate if a housemate was at home? If so, do they try to be quieter?

bright eyes in particular is very much a private animal socially and they'd both probably refrain if there's anyone over at all, which there probably wouldn't be.

it cannot be stated how much she hated the tent life, lol, given she's a little spoiled/far more of an urban person. it was major reason of buying a house and splurging on actual rooms at inns whenever possible, as well as wanting to spoil him rotten as well after surviving so long as a sellsword.

Are their sex drives pretty well aligned, or different? How do they handle it?

pretty aligned ~

Is the relationship open to other partners? If so, what are the rules around it? How would a conversation around opening it go?

absolutely not romantically. also not in tellius in general.

but in askr, sexually...

i do see him as a very skilled infiltrator of types and bright eyes in askr sends him on those kinds of missions with the idea of 'only if you're comfortable/the initiating party, if you see some information you can get thatways, the door's open to play around.'

it's more of a 'don't ask, don't tell' thing. sometimes the telling happens to make sure it doesn't become blackmail for somebody else (given it's usually an enemy party) but it's kept brief.

on the other side, bright eyes isn't interested in anyone else. valter in askr came the closest (before zihark was summoned when she was feeling emotionally low), but frankly the guilt at the thought of doing anything was enough that nothing happened.

(i know there's probably a few of you on here surprised i don't mention gunter. :p nah, for me his thing's with corrin and a certian somebody else in different worlds~. i have eyes, sure, lol, but i think our personalities would clash horribly, and i truly see him as a fellow leatherdaddy-coworker-to-have-a-beer-with after writing as much with him.)

If applicable, is contraception something they think about?

to be honest, with FE worlds i just take the easy 'there's a magical charm that'll take care of that~' route. (I do think due to the spirit charmer demon pact bright eyes is simply infertile as well.)

Are marks/bites something they'll let be done to them? Do they cover them or have rules about where they can be done?

he's the all over this, both giving and receiving. :) always have headcanoned him as bit of a flagrant masochist especially when it comes to shallow cuts versus impact play (impact play being a squick).

generally they'll both stick to places that are covered; it helps that they don't really show a lot of skin in the usual outfits.

How long did they wait after getting together to have sex?

a few weeks - they both talk about making a point of wanting to take the romance slow. really, it only happens when it does because he gets wounded and hurt/comfort vibes are just too irresistible :3

Any uncommon kinks/fetishes? Would they bring it up, and how so?

mm~~ there's a bunch for both partners i'll decline from mentioning.

The only hotel they can get accommodations at is a sexy themed one – how do they feel about it? What room theme are they picking?

y'all are going to die laughing but i kinda. headcanon this happening. already..... in canon when they're having that week-long stint free in Crimea between the marching.

a lot of the inns are already booked solid with half an army encamped around Meilor, and given the seedy nature of armies, the usual red-light districts are doing a good business and advertising prominently. Mind, Ike and Titania would keep a tight leash, but (imo) realistically, there's only so much discipline one can have with hired soldiers and the types of businesses that follow an army column. (Especially when there's other factions in that particular march. I imagine there's a few hawk tribe soldiers that get some good beorc puss. :p)

he wouldn't go for one of the tackier ones, but if it's classy enough with a humorous edge, he would. :)

[ryanhamiltonwalsh]

A Rick Rolls a Nation — a timeline of the JD Vance couch joke

July 15th, 2024: "can't say for sure but he might be the first vp pick to have admitted in a ny times bestseller to fucking an Inside-out latex glove shoved between two couch cushions (vance, hillbilly elegy, pp. 179-181)." — @ rickrudescalves (the now deleted tweet)

Arguably, this ground zero tweet overly complicates things. Soon, the "latex glove" element will be completely forgotten and JD will *only* be fucking couches "raw dog style" in almost all subsequent variations on the joke.

July 15th, 2024 - Present: The joke goes absolutely bonkers viral. Comedian Kathy Griffin, who famously overstepped in 2017 by posing for a photo with a model of Trump's bloodied, disembodied head, believes the joke to be true, boosts it as if it is.

July 24th, 2024: The Associated Press publishes a fact check of the "claim," which is inherently hilarious.

July 25th, 2024: The Associated Press retracts the piece, causing fans of the Vance/couch meme to go wild with delight, the joke being that they retracted it because there's actually something to it. “The story, which did not go out on the wire to our customers, didn’t go through our standard editing process. We are looking into how that happened" — AP spokesperson Nicole Meir

July 30th, 2024: Business Insider tracks down the originator of the joke and interviews him --->

"@ rickrudescalves hid the post within a week of publishing it, but the couch joke had already left an impression."

He says he was uncomfortable with the attention the joke received, and is mildly worried about being accused of election interference, but has no regrets.

Rick cites Werner Herzog, Jorge Luis Borges, John Fowles, and Hunter S. Thompson in explaining precedents for the form and details of the joke.

July 31st, 2024: JD Vance either intentionally makes a lame joke embracing (or trying to claim ownership of) the couch meme, or does so accidentally via free association. Either way, it falls totally flat and the man continues to dazzle America with his complete lack of charisma and his disgusting views on women's rights.

August 6th, 2024: Tim Walz is selected as Kamala Harris's Vice Presidential running mate. That night, in Philadelphia, Walz kills with a Vance/Couch joke.

August 7-8th-ish, 2024: The far right, led by Laura Loomer and Don Jr, makes an unfunny, clumsy, intentional attempt to do the same kind of joke with Walz by claiming...he...drinks horse cum? Because this is so...just gross—a classic over-escalation, you might say—and completely manufactured, this attempt seems to be dead on arrival.

August 9th, 2024: The non-GOP backlash officially begins. New York Magazine pubishes:

"Besides the tiresome-but-correct moral case, leaning on fake memes also just isn’t necessary, much as it may delight Democrats’ online base. Good political candidates have always known how to get vicious while staying within the lines of accuracy. This means homing in on opponents’ real weaknesses, a task the Harris campaign has thus far excelled at."

To which there was an excellent Twitter response:

Right. Who owns the joke? Is it democrats? Is it officials or citizens? The answer is no one, and therefore the idea it can be policed is itself a kind of joke, I think.

Where will it go from here? We shall see.

I wonder if we'll ever learn the identity of Rick, because, I agree, I think a joke made in mid-July may have altered history.

[gabessquishytum]

Hello Again Friend,

I wanted to thank you for your kind response to my last submission - it has given me the encouragement to actually start this outrageously large fic that I have going on in my head. We shall see if at least part of it will be ready for AO3 by the end of the year😅

I have been considering sending you a snippet I was working on but it’s not nearly as flushed out as the first scenario (emotional Dream kneeling fic idea, just to confirm) I submitted to you. (read: I haven’t had a 2am anxiety-induced writing frenzy over it lol). But seeing your reblog of deviantly-inspired’s post made me feel like I could share it with you no matter how unfinished. The concept in my mind is similar and is also inspired by multiple fandom headcanons/fic readings so here goes nothing~

*****

Before Dream begs Hob not to love him, before he kneels at the power Hob’s love has over him, and even before he allowed their relationship to slip unacknowledged past “just friends” into “what are we?,” territory, Dream had ignored his growing feelings for Hob. They had been friends seeing each other quite regularly for the better part of a year when Hob invited him upstairs to get away from the rambunctious new college graduates swarming the inn. Dream blamed their drunkenly hopeful and untamed dreams for the excitement he felt at following Hob to his private quarters. Of course, it was just a friendly invite considering Dream’s dislike for crowds and it was just a regular apartment for all intents and purposes. Except that it wasn’t. It was Hob’s apartment filled with Hob’s things and it was cozy and welcoming just like The New Inn. So how could Dream resist when Hob suggested they move future meetings there. “For the convenience, ya know? Less bothering the staff and saving money eating out ya know?” Hob is only rational so why disagree. “Not that you ever were an expensive date, ha! Seeing as I don’t think you ever ate at one of our meetings when I think about it. Hmm, do you even eat?”

Dream meets his eyes from where he sits across the couch: “If you mean do I need to consume sustenance for energy than no I don’t need to eat. But I usually abstain because like all things I consume I can sense the dreams of their creators which is unsatisfying in most cases.”

Hob’s eyes widen, “Unsatisfying because the dreams are bad or…?”

“Some. Often, the wishes are for riches or fame in cooking and sometimes they are dreams of being delicious or fulfilling which I find gratifying. But usually they are simply wishes to go home and rest which I believe you could see my hesitance for eating them in your company.” Dream smiles that tiny one-sided smile of his and Hob brightens up because he has a new goal based on what Dream said. He’s going to cook him a meal to enjoy just for him.

*Spongebob meme voice: Three Weeks Later”

Dream smells everything before he even knocks on the door of Hob’s flat. Hob has a bright smile despite the sweat on his face and he bows mockingly to say: “Your highness, dinner is served.”

Dream arches an eyebrow ready to decline the invite but even he knows it would be rude to deny as a guest. Especially when he can see Hob put a substantial amount of effort into the steaming pot he is currently scooping from. The drone of the oven fan fills the silent camaraderie of the moment as Dream sits at the small table set with two spoons and two glasses of wine. ‘How intimate,’ he thinks and is glad his embarrassed flush is covered up by Hob placing a gently steaming bowl in front of him and sitting across the table. “It’s just some beef stew but I hope you’ll like it. And it’s a totally odd companion dessert but I made some chocolate chip cookies to go with it. I’m just preheating the oven now.” Hob gives Dream a blindingly kind smile before he starts to eat and launches into a story about his Tuesday class.

The lack of pressure to eat or even talk is one of the things Dream appreciates about his friend. But to return this kindness he chooses to at least politely take a few bites before outright denying the cookies. On sight the stew is nothing more than dark gravy with hefty chunks of tender beef, soft carrots, fluffy potatoes, and translucent onions. A good hearty stew to be sure but nothing crazy for the palette and definitely not anything worth writing home about.

Dream scoops a single spoonful into his mouth and freezes. His natural stillness allows the moment to go unnoticed by Hob but the entire collective unconsciousness comes to a halt. The simple stew resonates with a multitude of wishes that coalesce into one overarching dream. The single most important dream of its creator imbued into every molecule and Dream can more than taste it. Run his human tongue over it, crush it between his teeth, and swallow it into the empty cavern of hunger too large for this human form to possess. The oven beeps so Hob excuses himself to quickly shape some cookies and get them into the oven. In the meantime, Dream is allowed to continue being overwhelmed in private.

He stares at where his spoon disappears into the comforting brown stew until his vision starts to blur. Tears are starting to well up in his eyes and though he has not been breathing this entire time his hands begin to shake. Shake with want, he wants to eat the entire bowl stew and all. The dream buried within that bowl begins to call to him and the intense fervor with which he wants to consume it all almost scares him. He wants to grab the still simmering cast iron pot and absorb it’s entirety into his being. Is it rude to eat Hob’s remainder? Could he lick the remaining flavor from within Hob’s lips so that he may always know it’s flavors? Is it too much to feel this way for a friend’s kindness? Is it too much for him to beg Hob for more sustenance? Is it too much to admit to Hob he is starving and only this will nourish him? What taste will his longing tears add to the broth? What more would Hob give him when he had nothing to offer in return?

The oven door shuts and suddenly the thought of an even sweeter food causes Dream to take in a lungful of air in fear. It would be too much to bear. It would be too much because he is too much.

“Are you okay, Dream? You look a little shaken.” Shaken? Yes, he is shaken to his core. The stinging tears threaten to fall but Dream blinks them back with immeasureable control because he cannot lose control. Not here.

“It is of no matter. My apologies for your efforts but I do not believe I could partake in your dessert. Thank you however, for the stew.” Dream carefully says only the truth. He does not say that it was ambrosia and the only reason he does not gorge himself on it is fear that there will be no more left. That’s not true, he fears acknowledging it would mean no more would come. Better to take this single bite now and have many singular bites in meetings to follow than to choke it all down now and never be able to feast again. He returns the spoon carefully to where it was initially set and puts his hands into his lap to hide their trembling.

“Of course, it’s totally fine, Dream! I would never force you to do anything you didn’t want. Besides, I’ll eat all of this myself eventually,” Hob smiles and tries not to let it be strained. He had hoped pouring all of his emotions into this meal would show Dream that he wanted to have more than just friendship with him but he must have misunderstood. It’s just plain soup after all and the cookies are the Tollhouse recipe so what was he expecting? A dramatic and mutual love confession? Was he thinking Dream would fall to his knees and rejoice in Hob’s regard? No! Of course, he would only stare at the soup with his starry eyes and take a singular bite before denying more. Maybe eating was painful and that’s why he had a pained expression on his face. Maybe Dream did know what feelings Hob put into the stew and was kindly ignoring them to allow Hob to save face and for that he was grateful. For that, he could continue their friendship without shame and choke down his soup and two cookies while still trying to play that he wasn’t bothered. He knew once Dream left the food would be thrown away.

Dream waited patiently for Hob to finish his stew and eat his warm cookies a little too soon after pulling them from the oven. Hob barely avoided choking on the burning dough through a series of undignified swearing about the temperature and blowing puffs of hot air from his open mouth. If Dream weren’t so caught up in his mind he would have done more than laugh his braying laugh. When Hob finishes they retire back to the perfectly worn out couch and Dream takes a last glimpse at the pot on the stove.

In that pot was a stew filled with unfathomable care and gentle regard for Dream. Every morsel flavored with warm feelings of positivity and each piece a wish for nourishment. The time taken imbued every spoonful with a wish for happiness. The mixture of textures and wishes gave the stew a singular flavor, a singular dream that Dream could not ignore. The stew, because its creator created it so, dreamed of comfort for Dream. A dream so beautiful and heartfelt it filled him with tears to be so cared for. It would be torture then to taste the cookies and know he could never have Hob. To know that he should not have Hob.

They said their goodnights and Hob packed away the stew because he couldn’t really bear to waste a perfectly good few meals. He did however, throw away the remaining cookie dough because it felt wrong to eat them or give them away when he made it for Dream. When he imagined Dream’s laugh with every scoop of flour, when he imagined the stars in Dream’s dark eyes for every grain of salt, the baking soda his smirk, the egg yolks his sunny small smiles, the white sugar his pale human skin, the brown sugar his dark unruly hair, the vanilla extract his unique scent, when every stir was a loving caress he longed to give and with every chocolate chip a sweet kiss. He would throw this declaration of love away if only to keep their friendship.

Dream returned to the Dreaming in a sweep of sand and he was glad to be away from Hob. From his flat’s intoxicating warmth and his easy smiles if only so he could think. He had to stop this from going further. He could not love Hob. It would ruin him. He would not let himself do that to his dearest friend…his only friend. He would not love Hob and it would be okay. Because they could be friends! Because it would be enough.

It will be okay because Hob does not love him.

****

You know, I am so sorry for coming to you a second time and just dropping my long ass scenarios on you lol. I just can’t get the imagine of Hob making Dream something yummy and it being so full of care that it makes Dream well up with tears. He has never been loved so quietly before, so patiently, so unobtrusively and I just want that for him. Hopefully, this will get worked into the same fic and hopefully one day we’ll all be able to read it lol. Once again, my apologies for dropping this on you but I hope you have a good day!!!!!!!!!!!!! ❤️

Sincerely,

🧶Anon

Oh beloved 🧶 anon!!! I'm so glad to hear that you felt encouraged by my last response, I'm absolutely thrilled and so excited by the prospect of reading what you create! Even if it takes some time, I promise that the effort will be worth it.

I'm absolutely obsessed with what you've done with Dream and food and love here. It's so beautiful and it's one of my favourite things to think about. How does Dream interpret love, as an Endless being with access to the entire collective unconsciousness of humanity? He seems very much to feel emotions in the same way that we do - perhaps even in a more heightened way. I'm so interested in the way a home cooked meal imbued with all of Hob’s thoughts and good intentions and love would make him feel. How overwhelming would it be to have those things directed at him specifically for once? Hob’s love is not overwhelming, in itself. It's an ember that's burned softly for many years, and nothing can put it out. But even though it is so gentle, Dream just can't... hold it. Not without coming apart.

And Hob, oh bless him. I'm totally in the "food is Hob’s love language" camp. I'm so emotional about the idea of him sadly throwing out the cookie dough, respectful of Dream’s wishes but still feeling a little bruised that his love doesn't seem to be enough. I think that he won't stop trying, though. That little ember isn't going anywhere.

So, once again: thank you for sharing this. You are wonderful and you're going to make a wonderful fic. I hope you have a great day, my friend!

[dazeddoodles]

The headcanons ✨ (turned into general raeda headcanons whoops)

When the two get married,raine takes eda's surname but also keeps their old surname and thus they become raine whispers clawthorne

The batts members become eda's unofficial adoptive kids after the two adjust with being together again

At home,Raine is the more nurturing type. While you think it may be hard for Raine to keep Eda in line,since they have a functional relationship,all Raine has to do is ask Eda and she'll comply.

Raine sleeps in Eda's nest only to make her happy,they didn't want to at first but ended up getting used to it.

Raine is actually the more responsible one out of the two when it comes to running hexside,we both know that eda would totally join in whatever chaos the kids get into. This is why the hexside students are more afraid of raine than they are of eda.

Raine overworks themself when doing their vice principal duties and Eda makes them take break by literally carrying them to a couch kicking and screaming

Eda has a second attachment for her hook to use when she and Raine are being lovey-dicey (knife kink-)

Eda kisses Raine’s possession scars when they are intimate,as if to kiss and make better and to show they are loved. Eda secretly thinks the scars are roguishly hot, but doesn’t say because of where they came from

Raine likes giving owl themed gifts to eda,even pre epilogue

Eda and raine occasionally go for a fly around the isles once raine gets used to eda's harpy form

Raine has nightmares after Belos’ possession and the collector’s puppet-ing of them. They were aware the entire time, but couldn’t respond to Eda at all. They wake up some nights panicking that it’s happening again,and Eda just holds them

Eda uses her harpy form when the two are getting it on since she knows how much raine loves it based on how they reacted to first seeing it

When Raine was in the emperor's coven they kept track of Eda and made sure she didn't get arrested. Or killed

The Owl Beast sees Raine as its mate and Eda lets the beast come out so that it can cuddle with Raine

Eda tied up her hair because it kept getting in the way whenever she was making out with raine

Eda steals their glasses when they need to go to work so they have to stay until she gives them back (which is immediately, because Raine pouts and Eda gives in to their puppy eyes)

Owlbert and raine's palisman are best friends which is why they often look out for eda/raine when either isn't around to do so, especially during the break up

Eda is ironically the better cook out of the two despite her definitely having a tendency to get "experimental" with cooking,this is why when the two go on dates it's at home with raine enjoying eda's cooking.

Eda just eats the bugs that scare Raine instead of exterminating them

Raine cries reading sad books and Eda doesn't understand but she tries her best to comfort them

Eda's love language is physical touch which is why she absolutely ached for any affection during the break up. The two cuddle a lot post epilogue to make up for this.

Raine has a sweet tooth and eda often makes or buys them pastries/candy as gifts because of this

Raine uses 8 different soaps and eda uses one for everything (like that one 10 in one shampoo meme)

The two never have any biological children,however they do have eda's many adoptive kids and the batts members

Raine has given up on the phrase "let's think about this rationally" post epilogue lol

I LOVE THESE 💕😭

[musemash]

BOND VILLAIN APPRENTICE IS A RASPUTIN WANNABE – unhinged rant by the Canuck Crank

"Musk: a greasy secretion with a powerful odor" – American Heritage Dictionary

Judging from countless rants, memes, videos, and comments online, many Americans evidently have accepted the official 2024 election results – and consequently, have resigned themselves to four more years of insane misrule by a TREASONOUS PSYCHOPATH and his misbegotten coven of DELUSIONAL MISCREANTS. This phenomenon is bizarre, to say the least.

For one thing, the ATTENTION WHORE IN CHIEF has actually won less than 50 percent of the popular vote. But that has not stopped the legacy media from feeding into the dubious narrative that MAGA has somehow mysteriously acquired a BIGLY YUGE MANDATE to usher in the agenda outlined in the FASCIST BIBLE known as Project 2025.

This is happening despite the fact that a lot of people have been raising serious concerns about the integrity of the election over the past several weeks. So far, no absolute empirical proof of fraud has been revealed; but too many questions still need to be satisfactorily answered as soon as possible, before DOUBLE AGENT ORANGE ascends to America's rusty Iron Throne.

Indeed, there are good, solid reasons to wonder whether the election result may have been SABOTAGED by various bad actors. If that was proven to be the case, the perpetrators would doubtless include tech trickster ELON MUSK; couch connoisseur JD VANCE; reliably devious RUSSIAN AGENTS; stupidly unscrupulous MAGA operatives; and certain FAUX NOISE propaganda parrots.

But sadly, many Democrats and antifascists seem to have suddenly come down with a kind of STOCKHOLM SYNDROME – meekly acquiescing to the NEW ABNORMAL, and falling for the corporate MEDIA GASLIGHTING aimed at trying to discredit these concerns. The understandable suspicions about the election are being glibly and condescendingly dismissed as mere conspiracy theories – allegedly the product of something called 'BLUE ANON', a supposed left-wing equivalent of QAnon.

But this is obviously a totally different situation, with none of the factors that spawned Trump's unhinged STOP THE STEAL movement. Democrats did not prime their base for months on end with dubious propaganda predicting rigged elections. They perpetrated no insurrections. And they have not engineered countless frivolous lawsuits promoting idiotic speculations. They are simply wondering how anyone can be stupid enough to think that voters in the swing states went for Trump, but also voted blue on so many other key races.

Of course, it is indeed possible that election skeptics are grasping at straws as consolation. But the documented irregularities cited by various observers are clearly legitimate red flags. A comprehensive recount and FORENSIC AUDIT are absolutely warranted, before the election results should be taken as gospel. After all, in 2021, Trumpers were allowed to file more than 60 fricking COURT CASES challenging the results. So why should the Dems just roll over and placidly accept this outcome?

If the election was sabotaged, one of the motives was surely to perpetrate a DIABOLICAL PSYOP, whose purpose was manyfold: to provoke Americans ever further into fearing and hating each other; to hoodwink them into drowning in profound despair; to get them to accept the notion that they are part of an incurably failed nation; and to motivate them to give up on the idea of ever returning to democracy.

In the face of all these suspicions, if Democrats don't vehemently insist on conducting an immediate autopsy of their WOUNDED BODY POLITIC, it would constitute a feckless dereliction of duty. Instead of standing up for democracy, they would be joining the ranks of too many media pundits and money-grubbing CEOs, who are capitulating to encroaching fascism.They would essentially be handing their country over to the psychotic GOP LOONIES on a red white and blue platter – and giving them a license to CANCEL LADY LIBERTY.

But this is no time to give up. While valid concerns about the election will doubtless be dismissed by cynical skeptics as conspiratorial LIBTARD FANTASIZING motivated by wishful thinking, I maintain that there are more than enough valid reasons to justify a thorough investigation. Most notably, a recent PLANET CRITICAL article presents a sobering scenario:

"Computer scientists and hacking experts have detailed how the USA’s election software was compromised – and the relatively simple hack which could have then been used to FIX THE RESULTS in the seven swing states. They are calling for an immediate hand recount in key precincts which, they say, should swiftly show that a number of these ballots NEVER EXISTED."

Furthermore, as cyber threat expert JACKIE SINGH recently stated on X, America's enemies "want us to believe our society is DISINTEGRATING, and that our streets aren't safe. This is part of the KREMLIN PLAN to foment suspicion and violence amongst Americans. Their gambit relies on us being unable to put the dots together…. They muddy the waters by using American or deep cover local intermediaries to provide the impression of organic DOMESTIC EMOTION – when in reality, the events and resultant emotions endured by the manipulated public are often fully manufactured and paid for by PUTIN."

Judging from the variety of allegations, there are many other plausible scenarios that need to be explored. Some claim that ballot drop boxes were BURNED in blue districts, and areas with a lot of minority voters; that thousands of mail-in votes were simply left uncounted, or discarded; that some ballots were stolen from post offices; and that seals were broken on 13 ballot tabulators in Milwaukee.

More than a million Democrats were apparently PURGED from voter rolls in Texas; Dems in red states were not sent the mail-in ballots they requested; postal employees were accused of ballot theft, and forging ballot signatures; some Dem mail-in ballots were rejected for supposedly mismatched signatures in swing states; and in one district, ballots were allegedly sent to an estimated 325,000 people who were not registered voters.

Disturbingly, voters in some Dem-leaning locales were reportedly threatened by MAGA voters. Even more troubling is the fact that over 50 phony BOMB THREATS, evidently originating with Russian agents, forced evacuations at various left-leaning sites in battleground states. During the distractions caused by all this chaos, saboteurs could quite possibly have manipulated voting machines.

Despite vociferous media assurances that Musk's STARLINK system was not involved in some way, it is nevertheless a real possibility. Considering his tech expertise, the SPACEX CADET could have found a way to surreptitiously connect a satellite to vote tabulating systems, to alter the counts in swing states. It is well known that Musk did a variety of unethical things to install PRECEDENT TRUMPERY in the Oval Office; so it is hardly far-fetched to think he might have tried to hijack the vote via technology.

Elon retweeted Tenet Media's Russian disinformation multiple times; he also approved DEEPFAKE ATTACK ADS; and disseminated propaganda filled with grotesque distortions of Kamala Harris' beliefs and political positions. Most concerning is Joe Rogan's claim that Tesla's boy genius actually possessed an app that gave him the election results FOUR HOURS before they were officially revealed. W the actual F????

There were also evidently a record number of new VOTER REGISTRATIONS this year. Does it sound plausible that there were 20 million fewer people voting this year than in 2020, when the pandemic kept many folks housebound? Considering how much malfeasance has been revealed about the TRAITOR IN CHIEF since that election, it beggars the imagination to think Democrats would NOT have turned up in overwhelming droves to make certain he could not possibly win.

Why would so many voters choose Democrat senators and congress people, but then turn around and vote for a CONVICTED FELON – who is also an exhaustively documented LIAR, a financial FRAUDSTER, an adjudicated RAPIST, a dangerous INSURRECTIONIST, and a traitor stealing NUCLEAR SECRETS? Are Americans' memories really that fucking short?

Dems won down-ballot congressional races in swing states; but mysteriously, those same voters also supposedly chose the CELEBRITY INMATE APPRENTICE as their top guy. Given the vast amount of evidence demonstrating the manifold crimes of the FELON IN CHIEF, why the actual fuck would any sane Democrat choose him over Kamala? And how credible is it, that Trump would win ALL SEVEN of the swing states? None of this makes any sense whatsoever, dammit!

Further, prior to this election, MAGA agents were known to have tampered with voting system technology. The most high profile culprit was TINA PETERS, a Colorado operative who recently got a richly deserved nine year sentence for a data-breach scheme she engineered a few years ago.

Also, as Rachel Maddow reported, several times at rallies Trump told followers he didn't NEED ANYMORE VOTES. He also stated that he and Speaker Mikey 'Moses' Johnson had a cute "LITTLE SECRET" that would guarantee they won. He promised he would divulge the secret after the election. We're still waiting, dumbass!

Of course, it is obvious that the USEFUL IDIOT IN CHIEF owes much of his "victory" to his close personal dominatrix CZAR VLADIMIR. Russian official Nikolai Patrushev recently confirmed this, asserting: "To achieve success in this election, Donald Trump relied on certain forces, to which he has corresponding obligations."

America now faces the consequences of allowing an arrogant SMIRKING SOCIOPATH like Elong MuskRat to purchase and install a sexual predator, adjudicated felon, and archtraitor in the White House. Since DEMENTIA DONOLD's slimy orange hands will be on the NUCLEAR CODES once again, it is crystal clear that drastic action is required. Thus, while some will doubtless dismiss the following scenario as naive and far-fetched, I happily offer this MODEST PROPOSAL for what it's worth.

Before he becomes a milkshake guzzling retiree, JOLTIN' JOE needs to cut the malarkey and unleash his inner DARK BRANDON one last time, to prevent the fascist heist of his nation. He should exercise the prerogative granted to him by the SCOTUS IMMUNITY decision, and order the FBI to conduct an independent investigation of any credible allegations of election cheating. Ideally, a detailed DOJ report on the results could be made public before INAUGURATION DAY. But if necessary, Biden could simply order that the inauguration ceremony be postponed till the process is finished.

If there is sufficient concrete evidence that the November 5th results were indeed hijacked, then Musk, Trump, Vance, Johnson, and any other MAGA cronies that are seriously implicated in the crime, should be detained in GITMO, pending trial for treason. The subsequent legal proceedings should be televised, live and unedited, to reassure a terrified world that the USA has indeed learned from the deadly mistake of the ghastly TRUMP ERROR.

Alternatively, Brandon could use his immunity to release all the evidence accumulated by JACK SMITH, regarding the Insurrection, the stolen classified documents, and Trump's many obstructions of justice. This would demonstrate that Joe has every reason to reopen ALCATRAZ to corral Donnie and dozens of complicit MAGA MINIONS. The next step would be to ANNUL the 2024 election and order a shiny new one, rigorously overseen by CYBERSECURITY agents and U.N. ELECTION MONITORS. Under the obvious emergency conditions, these would all definitely be legitimate "OFFICIAL ACTS."

But to be entirely realistic, we must also contemplate an even more troubling scenario than the ones I've outlined. What if the election was NOT stolen by the MAGAGOP? This would mean that a majority of the electorate, who were sufficiently motivated to get off their asses to vote, were also comfortable with the idea of having their country's worst WHITE COLLAR CRIMINAL be put in charge of their nation's destiny and their children's future.

Thus, they were content to basically trash America's legacy of FIGHTING FASCISM; metaphorically, they casually pissed on all the graves in ARLINGTON CEMETERY. How very disgraceful, and monumentally tragic, such an outcome would be. Now emboldened, the RAPIST IN CHIEF could very well take a wrecking ball to the USA, to satisfy his vengeance, and suck up to BIG DADDY VLADDY. If this happens, it will be a literal miracle if America survives the next four years.

By handing him the White House, myriad incredibly stupid voters have made it almost certain that he will NEVER FACE JUSTICE for his many documented crimes – and everything good about America will be run into the ground, by the most sickening lawbreaker in its history. But those who idolize this treacherous barbarian have nothing to gloat about. God help them if they ever have to face the truth about what they have ENABLED. We'll see who will be weeping in the end.

All that said, I still refuse to underestimate the tenacity and courage of the true patriots and "BETTER ANGELS" of the USA. So while the Yankee homeland won't be the Land Of The Free for the next several years, we will hopefully soon find out that this nation is indeed still the HOME OF THE BRAVE. It may still not be too late to witness the downfall and comeuppance of MUSKPUTIN and his MAGAMOBSTERS.

Best wishes to every one of America's citizens who still treasure democracy. To them I say: Many of us living outside your borders still care deeply about what happens to you. So STAND STRONG – and please don't give up! This is no time for despair, or to wallow in disgust. It's time to get determined – and hopeful. As labor union martyr JOE HILL put it just before he was executed: "DON'T MOURN – ORGANIZE!"

In conclusion: If y'all think I'm just a gullible type, over-reacting and living in a dream world, feel free to call me DON QUIXOTE – then just saddle me up, and point me to the nearest WINDMILL! But to make my case, I submit a very comprehensive archive of related news items, editorials, and satirical videos; I respectfully challenge you to check them out with an open mind.

If enough American voters become sufficiently aware of the deadly serious reasons for the aforementioned concerns, it may not be too late for them to demand that Dark Brandon rescue their nation from the UNBRIDLED DEPRAVITY of Trumpism before it's too late. You'll find the archive at the first link below. I urge you to share it as widely as possible.

HOW MAGA MINIONS & KREMLIN GREMLINS STOLE XMAS https://musemash.tumblr.com/post/42536218614/ TRUMPERY’S FOLLY VS THE MOMALA FACTOR https://musemash.tumblr.com/post/766200584914288640/ DARK BRANDON PASSES THE TORCH https://musemash.tumblr.com/post/736140385977597952/ THE KARMALA PHENOMENON https://musemash.tumblr.com/post/721712158853955584/ MARALARDO’S BROMANCE FOR THE AGES https://www.flickr.com/photos/aeon999/54233325168/in/album-72177720322854833/lightbox/ HOW LORD MUSKPUTIN CONQUERED MARS https://www.flickr.com/photos/aeon999/54233312564/in/album-72177720322832375/lightbox/ FINAL DISPATCHES FROM THE KAMBRAT ZONE https://musemash.tumblr.com/post/771191287661690880/

[rocambolestim]

Début De Soirée-La Vie La Nuit (1988) (song) stimboard!

Requests open 24/7!

x/x/x/x/o/x/x/x/x

Please read my pinned post before interacting, thank you!

(original banner created by @/catsquishy, i just simply edited it)

[id: a stimboard based off the 1988 euro disco song "la vie la nuit" by début de soirée, there are 8 gifs in total. 1st row's gifs are: 1. a camera zooming in on a vaporeon themed hoodie, 2. a small capybara plush is placed next to a capybara munching, 3. someone holding a blue crystal cluster. 2nd row's gifs are: 1. someone crossing out the word home on a worksheet w/ an out of the lines coloured red car in a red marker & putting a question mark next to it, 2. someone holding a holographic/sparkly pin of the "sparkle on, its wednesday" jerma meme. 3rd (final) row's gifs are: 1. someone doing various hand motions while wearing fursuit paws, they are rainbow & leopard print in colour w/ black fingers/inside & lenticular? (cant tell if theyre lenticular or holographic) claws/pawpads, 2. someone holding a double sided acrylic charm w/ tails & eggman sitting on a blue couch, one side reads "i miss my wife, tails" & the other one reads "i miss her alot" & the final gif of the 3rd (final) row is: closeup footage of someone walking on a dancerush stardom dance pad.

there is a banner w/ a black/white doodle of miché (a white furred cat wearing brown jester clothes) doing a heart sign w/ his hands on a dark grey background. there is text which is white coloured w/ black outlines , the banner reads: "please do not interact if: exclusionist, truscum, terf, cgl(re}, nsfw blog, (no)map, pro-ship, anti-mogai, anti-kin, anti-blm, anti-mspec gays, anti-endogenic systems."]

[4dorks-1windmage-1shadow]

oooh ask game! vio and/or shadow? (obviouslyyy)

You didn't say which ask game you wanted so you get one of the ones i didn't do haha

2-4 songs that are probably on their iPod

Vio -

Perspective - Cafune

erase me - Lizzy McAlpine ft Jacob Collier

Noises - Pale Waves

Miasma Sky - Baths

Shadow -

Mr. Brightside - The Killers

The End. - AS IT IS

Kick Me - Sleeping With Sirens

LosT - Bring Me the Horizon

the one place they sometimes end up falling asleep – where they’re not supposed to

Vio - Public transit, as long as it is quiet enough and he is tired enough

Shadow - In a tree or some other place high up, because he is a fool and in most cases if he falls he'd be fine

the game they'd destroy everyone else at

Vio - Tetris or Dr Mario, some sort of speed based puzzle games. Also, card games but thats because he cheats and counts cards

Shadow - Rhythm games like Guitar Hero, DDR, and Just Dance. Also charades and improv games

the emoticon they’d use most often

Vio - : /

Shadow - >: 3c

what they act like when they haven’t had enough sleep

Vio - total zombie, communicates exclusively in grunts and grumbles, thousand yard stare into the abyss

Shadow - either grouchy and irritable or loopy and cuddly, could be mistaken for stoned. There is no middle ground

how they like to comfort/care for themselves when they’re in a slump

Vio - Tea or coffee from his favorite cafe, a big book and a fluffy blanket, a comfy chair, and his room is locked and no one is bothering him for at LEAST a day

Shadow - garage jam session with pizza. He plays music until he's sore from it. Alternatively, he's vegging out on the couch, bingewatching anime or playing minecraft

their preferred hot beverage on really cold nights. or mornings. or whenever.

Vio - Chamomile tea

Shadow - Caramel hot chocolate

what they wanted to be when they grew up

Vio - Librarian or author or archeologist or teacher or- (he couldn't decide)

Shadow - he wanted to join the circus LOL

their favorite kind of weather

Storming in the early summer

thoughts on their singing voice (decent? terrible? soprano? alto?)

Vio - His singing voice is somewhere between Lizzy McAlpine and carolesdaughter . He sings better when harmonizing with someone, otherwise he has a complete lack of rhythm

Shadow - He can scream/growl, higher singing voice. My voice claim for him is Patty Walters of AS IT IS.

how/what they like to draw or doodle

Vio - likes to draw plants, bugs, and birds. If he's doodling out of boredom, its probably animal patterns or flowers

Shadow - graffiti and silly emotes, memes. He has body safe markers to doodle on his hands and arms when he's bored, otherwise he is using whatever he can get his hands on (even if it's sharpies)

[the-tmnt-ficfinder]

Ficfinder finds: Though the Truth May Vary

Rottmnt Oneshot Summary: “Um, obviously, there’s something wrong!” Leo said, emphatically throwing his arms. “Why else would I have asked in the first place if there wasn’t?” Multiple blank expressions came at him, but Leo dismissed them with a petulant huff and crossed his arms, flopping back against the couch. “There’s also the fact that April hasn’t sent a single meme to the group chat in, like, forever,” he grumbled, “but who’s paying attention?” Three, simultaneous blinks, and then— “Sweet Lovelace! Leo’s right!” Donnie exclaimed. “Guys, the last meme April sent was eleven days ago!” “Say what now?” Raph yelped. Leo rolled his eyes. “That’s what I’ve been trying—” “Ohmigosh, guys!” Mikey suddenly straightened up, unfolding his legs and smacking Leo’s and Donnie’s knees in the hasty process. “April didn’t even caption this meme!” --- OR: April is a big sister first and foremost, and copes with the End of the World™ accordingly. Leo is a little brother two-point-five-fourths of sometimes, and copes with his sister's coping accordingly.

Though the Truth May Vary: Appraisal and Ratings

(Don't know what fanfic "Appraisal and Ratings" means? Check out my explanation on my Main Masterpost! Looking for a different fanfic to read? Head on over to my Fanfic List Masterpost!)

Disclaimer: This fanfic is a oneshot, and is completed! This fanfic is written by @kattythingz, so go show them some love and support!! This fic is only available to those who have an Ao3 profile.

The fanfic ratings are not based on quality, favoritism, or how good I think it is, but rather, how intense a subject may be. Like a movie review, or the tags on Ao3, letting the readers know what to expect.

Plot: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Plot is three out of five!! The plot for this story, is not actually the main focal point of the story. The plot happens around the emotional growth and experience that April goes through. Not a wildly intense plot, though certainly riveting!"

Suspense/Mystery: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Suspense/Mystery two out of five!! The story hold some suspense and mystery, though as stated earlier, its not the main focal point of the story, mainly revolving around emotions, rather than story points."

Angst/Hurt: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Angst/Hurt is three out of five!! This fic is very April and Leo centric, and centers around their emotional struggles. There's some good angsty moments, and some good moments full of emotional hurt as well!"

Fluff/Comfort: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Fluff/Comfort is three out of five!! I'd say the comfort levels of the fic are about the same as the angst levels. They're very well balanced out!! Just enough of both to make a good story with a happy ending!!"

Emotions Conveyed: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Emotions Conveyed is two out of five!! This fic won't really screw with your head much. Its not highly intense, and instead is mostly a wholesome, and slightly upsetting read. Both April and Leo struggle with feeling good enough during this fic, and I'd say the writing there is quite good!"

Drama/Tension Level: 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Drama/Tension Level is four out of five!! While this fic doesn't have a lot of tension, it sure does have a lot of drama!! Especially regarding the plot portion of the story, a lot of drama goes down!!"

Triggers: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Triggers for this chapter are two out of five!! Very very little triggers in this oneshot. There's some violence, and some blood, along with over all feelings of inadequacy. Remember to read the tags!!"

Legibility (Reading): 💛💛💛💛💛

"Legibility (Reading) is five out of five!! This oneshot has two hand drawn images in it, which you'd totally miss if you only listened to it."

Legibility (Audio): 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Legibility (Audio) gets a two out of five!! This oneshot is not one really designed to listen to. First of all, it has some artwork closer to the end that would be missed if listened to. Plus, throughout the story, as Leo is speaking Spanish, his words are referenced with little numbers in correspondence to a language chart in the notes at the bottom of the fic. You can listen to this oneshot, though I'd say the experience is better if you read it."

Length: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Length is three out of five!! This fanfic is a oneshot, takes 1 hour & 25 - to 1 hour & 26 minutes to read, and has a word count of 15.5k words!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Personal thoughts on chapter below cut (Contains Spoilers)

First of all, it seems that this fic is inspired by two different songs!! The title for this fic was taken from Little Talks by Monsters and Men, and the fic was inspired by Kaibutsu by Yoasobi!

“Yes, exactly!” Leo interrupted him. “When was the ‘last time’ we actually, properly saw her, Mikey?” Mikey opened his mouth to no doubt say, we saw her three days ago, Leon, or something equally sassy and disrespectful, but Leo beat him to it by adding, “Outside of JJ Night and Pizza Runs. Everyone knows skipping on those is grounds for disownment, so they don’t count!” Mikey heaved an exasperated sigh (See? Disrespectful!) and said, “That doesn’t even make sense, Leon.”

I like the little details of Leo being a little more obsessed with respect and disrespect, as this is post invasion, and he's been leader for a while now. Before, he wouldn't have really cared to much, as he wasn't leader. Though now that he's been leader, he's picked up Raph's habit

“—April is legally bound by the Sacred Covenant to attend JJ Nights and Pizza Runs unless she has more pressing matters to prioritize, which in that case, she’s also legally required to inform us beforehand so that we know not to wait up for her.” Donnie stopped to actually breathe, before continuing, “All that is to say, JJ Nights and Pizza Runs do not, in fact, count as ‘seeing’ April. It only counts as ‘seeing’ her if April herself planned something spontaneous that we totally didn’t know about but were totally down for anyway.”

Good set of lungs lol. I tried speaking this aloud, to see how long I could go, and yeah, I was out of breath at the end.

“Nobody said you were incapable, Leo,” Mikey said in that sweet, genuine tone of his, and on any other day, the concern would’ve warmed Leo’s heart. But today wasn’t one of those days. Today was chilly, and Leo needed a thicker jacket.

Oh goodness, I absolute adore this analogy!! This is beautiful!! Like a new way of saying putting up walls. I also enjoy what this all implies. Leo feels like his brother are being 'cold' towards him, hence the statement 'chilly'. As such, he blocks out the cold, with a jacket. A mental jacket.

“Well, there is the fact that you came here wearing your favorite jacket,” she said, raising a pointed eyebrow at the brown jacket. “Please. As if that’s enough to—” “And also, you’re bouncing your leg.” Said bouncing limb suddenly halted in its motion, before restarting a second later. Leo sighed.

Ah yes, the ultimate anxiety stim. The leg bounce.

“Actually, I’m not really in the mood for horror right now,” she said, waving off the invisible condensation around her.

I quite like that, 'invisible condensation'. What an interesting little concept to think about. What it means metaphorically, and imagining it.

Five slumped against the pavement. “I told you it was your attitude, Kasper,” they said sullenly. “Hey! No names on the—!” Leo couldn’t help the loud chortle that escaped him. “Wait, wait, wait! Hold on!” He squatted down to get a closer look at Four. “Your name’s Casper? As in, Casper the Friendly Ghost?” Casper—Casper!—groaned. “For the last time, it’s spelled with a—”

Y'know what's fun about little things like this, is that they're only immediately known to the readers, with the characters being none the wiser.

It shamed Leo to admit that, when half was said and done, it wasn’t his uncharacteristic and uncalled-for viciousness that snipped the sentence short in his mouth. No, rather, it was April, who’d all but frozen. April. April frickin’ O’Neil, who notoriously did not put up with Leo and his brothers’ bullshit no matter how snappy they got with her— Just froze in wide-eyed dread.

Its interesting to think of how this scene would play out from April's POV rather than Leo's. Perhaps April feels scared by Leo's uncharacteristic violence, not because of the violence, but because its new or different. Like too different, and that's wrong, because she's supposed to be watching him, and making sure he doesn't get hurt. To Leo its just a burst of rage, but to April, its like a little display of how she thinks she's failing.

She smiled, small and forced, and for a moment—for one, damning moment, it was like staring into a mirror. A dark, shadowed mirror.

I'm assuming, Leo saw this, and was reminded of himself. Of his own fake smiles, and fake cheer.

Standing in front of a plain store building was none other than her ex-boss and the turtles’ Foot-face One, Mr. Ashimoto. He looked to be carrying a box of metallic-looking knick-knacks and kept checking his surroundings as he edged toward the store entrance.

I like how in April's POV, The Foot Leader has a name.

“I don’t think that was Gram-Gram that just protected me,” he told her solemnly. “Gram-Gram’s aura was that bluish green, remember? And, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this already, but…” He tried for a grin. “You’re kind of glowing yellow right now.”

Ooh I like this!! The little details, and the fact that her nimpo is yellow is a very clever idea!!

“Typical April O’Neil fail, am I right?” she continued with the miserable joke. “I try way too hard to do the easiest, simplest thing—that I shouldn’t even have to try in order to do in the first place! And—” Her voice cracked. “And I failed. Just like I always do.” “Woah, hey,” Leo’s own voice pitched awkwardly. “April, what are you talking about? You didn’t fail. You literally beat that guy to home run! And you made it look super easy! Even though we both know it’ll probably take any of us years to ever be half as badass as you are.” He reached for her shoulder again, ducking his head to April’s angle when she didn’t look up. “With or without your scary bat.”

I can see how she's gained this perspective. After all, she does think her birthdays are cursed. I was recently rewatching some of the Rise episodes, and I noticed that April tends to smash before thinking. Even in situation where peace could have been brokered, April goes right ahead and attacks, angered that her brothers had been messed with.

My last little thing to say, is the text conversation right at the end was hilarious!! The names were great, and the content very amusing!!

[wolffyluna]

Ask meme 1, 2, ,3?

1.name ur politically correct ship that no one ever questions

I'm not sure Celebrimbor/Maeglin should be considered politically correct, but when people question it it's much more "...how are you getting them in the same place at the same time?" and not because it's ~~problematic.

Though I bet you could make it problematic, if you tried hard and believed in yourself. (There's a fic I haven't written because I somehow lost the WIP between the couch cushions, but it was based around [wiggle hands] deliberately taking spikier interpretations of Maeglin and Celebrimbor than fandom usually does. Still not sure people would consider it problematic, though.)

2. now name ur trash ship

sigh. I have found myself unironically like Mystra/Gale. I am a sucker for being in a romantic relationship with a god. I'm also a sucker for being in a romantic relationship with the anthropomorphic concept of physics, that point where worship and study and love meet*. I love having a nasty break up with physics because you tried to impress her!

I'm just. Occaisionally irritated by the fandom interpretation of it. I'm only partway through the game, so I may need to hunt and kill a crow later for the pure purpose of eating it, but I don't agree with the interpretation that Mystra was malicious? Were there massive power dynamics and that's part of why things broke? Hell yeah! (Though, like. I like worshipper/god ships in part of the power dynamic.) But I don't think Mystra was trying to take advantage or set Gale up to fail and-- like. "Don't do stuff with Karsite weave" and "if you are one of the few people who can save the world, you should probably sacrifice yourself to achieve that" are not unreasonable asks.

*Before I started playing Baldur's Gate 3, I was on a kick of reading non-fiction about the history of physics, and that has almost certainly coloured my reading of Mystra/Gale. A lot of physicists would totally have smooched relativity if it wasn't too abstract to smooch. And that's relativity, and not say, radiation where-- yeah. a lot of physicist loved it. didn't stop it from killing them, though.

3. and ur really trashy im-going-to-hell ship

I have a few really trashy ships, but most of them I can ~artistically justify~.

I cannot justify Sevatar/Rushal. I just love it.

Romance is when you remove someone's tongue and they join your army anyways :3c

[brooklynislandgirl]

ヽ( ´O｀): What is their body language like when sleepy? 

(Дﾟ≡ﾟДﾟ): When they are surprised by somebody do they physically jump? Scream? 

(⸝⸝⸝ ̑ ̑⸝⸝⸝):  Does their face get red after they drink?

(„ᵕᴗᵕ„): Does their face turn red when embarrassed? If so, how else do they react when embarrassed? (I.E. Shifting of weight upon foot, etc.)

( ๑‾̀◡‾́)σ»: Do they have a sensitive spot/s?

Other People's Memes || Accepting

I. ヽ( ´O｀): What is their body language like when sleepy? 

Beth isn't the type of person who sits still very often. If she's watching television or listening to music, she's also drawing, painting, knitting. She runs in the mornings before or after work depending on when she's released from work. There's never really moment at work where she can sit and relax. When it does happen? She takes her break from the ER and goes down to the NICU so she can help with the smallest and neediest of babies. Beth dances and she surfs. She gardens with one of her favourite tenants. She's never met a volunteering or charitable opportunity that she's been able to turn down. So why would sleeping be any different? A chronic insomniac, she doesn't really get a night's sleep until she drops dead in her tracks. Or more correctly, she dozes off on the couch. Slouches down at the table and cradles her head right next to the cup of coffee she's just poured herself. Fallen asleep in the bathtub only to wake up in the freezing cold. Signs of sleepiness manifest as rapid blinks and nodding head. Hand movements slowing to a crawl. She tends to curl up almost protectively ~if she's on the couch, she draws her knees up to her chest, rests her chin or cheek against them~ if and when she's lounging. If she's standing, she tends to lean on something solid: door frames, appliances, and the like. Sometimes her speech slurs or her pidgin thickens, it might take her longer to reply to conversation and she becomes more easily confused or lost. She has to stifle yawns. II. (Дﾟ≡ﾟДﾟ): When they are surprised by somebody do they physically jump? Scream?  If the person who surprises her is lucky, Beth might gasp and flinch. Pulling her limbs back and making herself even smaller than she already is so that she isn't as easy a target. These are clear signs of residual trauma or abuse. If the person who surprises her is unlucky? Beth lashes out. She will instinctively cast one of her more violent, bloody spells. The kind that rupture internal organs, cause flowing and bloody lesions, and can easily cripple or incapacitate a being in the quickest, grossest way possible. III. (⸝⸝⸝ ̑ ̑⸝⸝⸝):  Does their face get red after they drink? Beth doesn't actually drink that often. At most she will have a glass of wine in the evening. A cocktail or two at a function, especially if she doesn't want to be there but feels as if she has no choice. She tends to drink slowly because she has such a high metabolism and she neither likes the feeling of not being in total control of herself and because she's always worried about how it will interact with or effect her medications. So it is incredibly rare for Beth to become flushed while drinking, though her eyes might sparkle a little more than usual and she finds it a little easier to relax. IV. („ᵕᴗᵕ„): Does their face turn red when embarrassed? If so, how else do they react when embarrassed? (I.E. Shifting of weight upon foot, etc.) Beth does blush for varied reasons. She cannot take a compliment easily, finding it either undeserved if it's based on merit, skill, or thoroughness of a job or task, or worse, if it's a compliment based on her physical appearance. When embarrassed, she does blush, tends to look down at her feet if she's standing or hands folded in her lap if she's seated, trying to avoid the gaze of the person or people she's feeling embarrassed in front of, and she can hear her own heart pounding in her ears, drowning out almost all other sound. Her shoulders might roll forward and she will find a way to apologise for herself. V. ( ๑‾̀◡‾́)σ»: Do they have a sensitive spot/s? All of her. Beth is extremely sensitive to touch, and it is her primary love language. That being said...the sides of her throat are particularly sensitive and it should be considered a badge of honour if she allows someone to touch, bite, kiss and so on, along her neck. She is incredibly ticklish at the spot above her hips and below her lower ribs. Likewise, the inner skin of her thighs are nearly as sensitive as her throat, and we won't even talk about the soles of her feet.

[hypostatic-oath]

I can see it depending on personalities and on the characters themselves tbh. It's an interesting thing about hsr - they have different perspectives on the Aeons (Yaoshi my controversial beloved) and other entities based on cultural and personal experiences and that is actually shown. Since hsr characters are familiar with videogames, though, it is easier for them to grasp the concept of what is actually going on. It is possible that some may see you as a sort of Aeon or spirit, some seriously and others for the meme (*cough* the trailblazer *cough*).

The first thought that comes to mind is that Silver Wolf has immediately gained a kindred spirit. Someone who also understands that the world is a game? Finally!

She'd 100% be the most talkative and the most nonchalant. Reality is a game, of course there's people playing. And if they happen to be chill, well, she's more than happy to lend a hand. Befriend your local Silver Wolf, y'all. She's onto you. Idk enough stellaron hunter lore to know whether she'd share it with the others, but this girl would know what's up.

The Trailblazer now uses you as an excuse for anything. Dan Heng and March wonder what the Trailblazer keeps looking for in the belobog dumpsters? Not their fault, it's definitely you who insists on investigating. They put their feet up on the couch and Pompom is panicking? You made them do it. They keep flirting with everyone? Clearly, your doing. They introduced themselves as something super dramatic and largely innacurate? Guess who's to blame. "The devil made me do it but I also kinda wanted to" vibes from them. Like yes, those are things they would've been naturally inclined to do or say... but it was totally, definitely the MyStErIoUs SpAcE bEiNg that made them do it. They will 100% think you're the Stellaron that is inside them at first. (I love the fact that we can just. Fuel the trailblazer's dumbass energy. Like hell yes eat garbage for the achievement. We're basically their intrusive thoughts at this point and we are winning.)

If you end up being considered an Aeon, oh boy. Prepare for the weirdest Simulated Universe encounter. Imagine pulling up to one of the worlds and

If that is the case, Herta is most likely smug about the fact that you get her for free, because essentially she gets unlimited access regardless of whether you pulled her or not. I wonder which type of blessings ya'll's Paths would have...

Idk enough stellaron hunter lore to base this on more than "sounds cool idk" BUT. Keeping in line with my interpretation of sagau, I'm gonna say that the player as an Aeon would be considered the kind of entity responsible for making events come to pass. (If you don't play the game, Kafka doesn't put the stellaron in the Trailblazer's body, no one defends the Herta Space Station from the Antimatter Legion, Bronya never discovers the truth, etcetera that I will not list to not spoil the game for anyone). This ties in with the whole "slave of destiny" thing Elio has. One of the player's Aeon titles could very well be "Bringer of Destiny" or "The Fate Enforcer" (kinda like Yaoshi is seen as "The Plagues Author" and Lan is "The Reignbow Arbiter"). Either way, the Stellaron Hunters are rocking with us for now. Silver Wolf knows the truth, Kafka is the first person we meet and the first person we help/guide/control in the game...

The Xianzhou's Divination Commission classifies the Aeons into three groups: "The Arbiters," who determine mortal births and deaths, and are highly connected to the rise and fall of civilizations, "The Sacrosancts," who are difficult to predict as good or evil, and "The Authors of Calamity," who are seen as the main culprits behind all disaster. With this in mind, I'd wager that you would fall somewhere along the Sacrosancts, but one can never be sure. After all, who's to say that the disruptive arrival of a force that sets catastrophe in motion just by existing wouldn't be immediately placed among the last group? I do believe that it'd depend on the way each of us as players interacts with the world.

sum thoughts about sahsrau, like would they hate your guts for stuff, idk or would they think of you as an Aeon?? It probably depends on your personalities or smth like that :P

[wonwooslibrary]

svt as boyfriends ♡ junhui edition

member: junhui <3 genre: fluff, bullet points word count: 940 summary: junhui's boyfriend things <33 warnings: none !! it's all fluff <3 author's note: hello and welcome to sam's new birthday-based svt bullet point series..and who better to start with than gasp junhui !!!

I think that Junhui is the type of boyfriend where you can’t predict his next move, but like. In a good way? 

Is he going to plan a movie night for the both of you? Or is he going to plan a week-long vacation to some kind of tropical island for you? 

Jun is truly the best of both worlds ! 

Quality Time 

Jun would love spending time with his s/o! For example, if you just wanted to sit on the couch and read a novel, there is no way he wouldn’t join! He would sit with you next to you in the living room, calm music playing, and playing Genshin 

bc even tho I know nothing abt it, I know that Jun is so addicted to mobile games there is no way he wouldn’t play Genshin

Jun also would love practicing a dance and looking over his shoulder and :O there you are! Studying for an exam while he pulls a twice and dances the night away! 

Even though you are doing different things, Jun loves just being around you <3 Being in the same room is enough for him !!!!

Words of Affirmation

This man is a man of compliments !!!

I feel like Jun’s way of showing love in words would be like. Dad jokes. 

He speaks in memes and I love that for him, so if he just wakes up and the first thing he says is a really awful pun, just know that is his way of saying “I love you” 

And this man is fluent in multiple languages pls he would totally say something under his breath in Mandarin about how amazing and beautiful you are, but when you ask what he said and be like ??? 

He’d just go “oh i never said anything hehehe” and it would annoy you 

But after a while you’d learn that he’s not making fun of you, but instead complimenting you in the language close to his heart !!! 

God I love this man

Physical Touch

I have one word for this man and physical touch. 

C U D D L E S 

He doesn’t care where you are, or what you are doing, he loves just hanging off of you like a koala 

You ran into a friend of yours from school? He’s got a hand on the small of your back encouraging you to not be nervous in front of someone you haven’t seen in a long time

You are doing chores around the house and are stopping for a water break? Junnie’s wrapping his arms around you in a back hug so fast you can’t swallow your water in time 

Also bonus points on this one if he scares the crap out of you bc he’d just be vibing and then walk so silently that you’d think he was a demon or something ! 

If you’re watching a movie or vibing on the couch together, he’d rest his head on your thigh (or visa versa ! ) and you’d just rake your fingers through his hair until he rubs at his face because his bangs are tickling him 

Or stabbing him in the eyes, whichever comes first ! 

Jun would never be nervous or scared to cuddle you or touch you in any way - if he sees that you’re nervous he wants to let you know that he is here for you, and if it’s not the time for words, he won’t stop himself from a back rub or a shoulder pat! 

Acts of Service 

Picture this: the both of you go grocery shopping, and you are pushing the cart. When Jun finally decides to stop filling the cart with snacks and notices you’re struggling to push the cart because it’s a bit heavier than expected…

He doesn’t even take a breath before shooing you from behind the cart and pushing it himself ! 

After you’re he’s done paying for the groceries and they’re all bagged up - he’ll do the heavy lifting of putting the bags in the cart and pushing it to the car! And he’ll even pick up the heaviest ones and put them in the backseat for you

When you come home from classes one day and he notices that you’re stressed out? Don’t worry - he’ll do the bulk of making dinner AND cleaning up! 

When you question him about it, he just shrugs his shoulders 

Jun is the type where he would do something without thinking - especially if it means helping you be more happy and comfortable ! 

Gift Giving 

I honestly feel that at the beginning of a relationship, Junhui is going to be SUPER awkward and since he’s not gonna know how to show you his love, he sticks with quality time! 

But the further you get into a relationship he learns that there are always better ways to show you just how he feels about you and that ….. Does not include buying gifts :((

But he has his reasons! He’d be too scared of buying you something you don’t like or won’t use! He doesn’t want to embarrass you in front of your classmates and coworkers by delivering flowers…so he just sticks to the basics ! 

Using his card to buy groceries, keeping your favorite snacks stocked up in the cupboards, and even leaving you some cash every day to get yourself a drink and a snack in the morning before work or classes 

Even though he’s not getting you anything too special, you appreciate the thought, and make sure to let him know that you love everything he does for you, and that you’re very thankful to be with him and have him in your life <3

[songbyrd-writes]

SFW John ‘Soap’ MacTavish headcanons

A/N: NGL I am weirdly in love with him, he's silly and these are probably ooc.

Edit: Added one new (long) headcanon (that's based IN CANON THO !!!)

On Base:

- Oh my gosh the PDA, he doesn't caaareee. He's got an arm around you at all times that you're nearby.

- Non-stop talks to you or Ghost through the comms unless he *has* to be silent.

- Probably follows you around the base cos he's clingy.

- Tries to show off around you all the time (whether it be getting a good shot or even trying to clear a house quicker than he already does.)

- The guys making jokes about how he acts all the time.

- Boasts about your accomplishments no matter what they're for ("yeah? well, have you seen how great y/n is at-")

Off Base:

- Cuddly as hell, if you're laying in bed or sitting on the couch he'll try to lay next to you or on you.

- Doesn't know how to cook and probably should not be allowed to ;;

- He probably talks about wanting to get a pet with you but knows he can't really because you're both gone so often.

- "Saturdays are for the boys" type motherfucker, he won't stop you from coming along with him and the rest of the 141 and he will obviously try to pay attention to you but he may be distracted by watching football (uk not us.)

- Would show you off and talk about you to ANYONE ("have you met my partner? they're amazing.")

- Keeps a photo of you and him in his wallet AND as his phones background. he also probably likes taking lots of pictures of you and posting them on his social media.

- On the topic of photos and social media, he would absolutely send you pics of himself after the gym and if you work out, he'll be happy to bring you along (totally will not be super excited even if you work out on the complete opposite side of the gym to him.)

In General:

- Soap is like a puppy, he loves you a lot and he has no understanding of personal space.

- Leaves hickeys anywhere you allow him, he doesn't care if the others notice them or if they need to be covered by makeup.

- Randomly shows you memes or tiktoks that he sees that remind him of you or that he thinks would make you laugh.

- If ya'll get into a fight and he makes you upset he'll leave you a little note telling you he's sorry and that he loves you right next to a cute stuffed animal.

- Definitely asks Price for relationship advice, he's not inexperienced but he is perhaps a tiny bit afraid of doing something wrong without realizing it ("what should we do for dates?" "what if they don't like this?" and more questions that Price sometimes can't answer.)

- Soap will try to get interested in something you like even if it's something that seems really strange for him to like.

- Picks up phrases and terms you use (bro def has ADHD and his ass cannot help but mirror you lmao)

- Soap loves to draw, it gives him something to focus on for a while. Whenever you're distracted doing something he likes to pull out his journal/sketchbook and just draw you, sometimes he'll show you the drawings he did which have a gritty comic style (think similar to Gerard Ways art style,) but other times he likes to keep them to himself because he gets a bit embarrassed by how frequently he draws you but he just can't help it!