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feyascorner · 1 year ago

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10 | The Fangs Between Us

summary. “The damage you’ve done to my stomach is plenty. Thank you, darling,” he frowns. “And if I may: It isn’t completely fair to place all the blame on me, is it? I might’ve been intoxicated, but I wasn’t deranged enough to miss the way you kissed me back. Aggressively, might I add?”

You roll your eyes. “I was trying to bite your lip off.”

“I would believe you if you hadn’t made such teasing sounds when I bit back.”

warnings. angst, comfort, slow burn, tav reader is a bard, italics are flashbacks, suggestive content!!!! (new warning hehe)

pairing. Astarion x GN!Reader

parts. TFBU masterlist

a/n. actual????? communication????? after 45k words?!?!?!?!?!? or is it...this chapter is literally them being loser teenagers i love them

To you, his touch is like a drug.

His breath, cool against your hot skin, presses against the shell of your ear as something dangerously close to a whine escapes your lips. You can feel him grin as he lowers his head and places a long kiss on your collarbone. His slender hands slide up your back, grinding you even closer than you already are as he mouths at every nook and cranny of your body. It’s almost like he wants to consume you whole. To drink you until all that’s left is a shuddering mess, your body still begging for his own.

White curls tickle your chin as the strings on your shirt finally come undone. His tongue brushes against the peak of your bare breast, and your eyes meet him in a lust-clouded haze, lips pursed as you swear you could reach your peak just by the way he looks at you. It’s so intimate, so vulnerable, so pleasurable that your eyes half close when the palm of his hand smooths against your clothed core.

He stills, lifting his head to kiss his way up to your neck again. As much as you want to beg him to resume what he’s been doing, he doesn’t let you. Instead, his fingers bring your face to his.

“Don’t hide from me.”

You shudder. You think you know plenty with how flushed your face is, but he doesn’t seem to care. He lowers back down your chest, grinning as he lays his cheek on your skin teasingly.

“If you look away, I’ll stop, my love.”

“Are you insane? Of course, he’s staying here!”

You lurch up from your pillow as the earth-shattering reality of the morning sun blares you awake. Cheeks burning, you rub at the bags under your eyes, humiliated in the face of nobody but yourself, as you hear more voices from downstairs. None of which even try to keep it quiet. You stare down at your legs, lips pursed.

Only still half-awake, you can practically feel his hands on your waist.

Curses. What are you? A prepubescent teen?

With a loud groan, you force yourself onto your feet. Considering how your dreams will only add to your stress, you might as well.

“Oh, thank gods you’re here. Tell him we’re not taking Astarion with us to the celebration, will you?” Shadowheart hisses as you descend the stairs, still half asleep. “Our wizard seems to have gotten the wrong idea about the leech upstairs.”

You swear Lae’zel snorts.

“It was only a suggestion. I wasn’t sure if we’d want to leave him alone here…isn’t that merely an invitation for him to run away?” Gale rubs his temple with his thumb, clearly exhausted.

You’re fully aware of Astarion’s nightly escapes into the city, but you don’t tell them that. It’s better not to cause a panic.

Shadowheart shrugs. “We’ll tie him to the counter. Hells, we can just lock him into the basement.”

Gale sighs. “He’s not a dog.”

“He acts like it,” Lae’zel grumbles, sinking her teeth into an apple.

“We could ask the Duke to spare some of his soldiers for the night. Make them keep watch while we’re at the party,” Shadowheart offers. “Anything to keep that dirtbag here instead of there. Isn’t that right, Tav?”

Gale’s eyes meet with yours. There’s a sort of expectancy in them that makes you squirm in your shoes as they bore straight into your soul as if he’s aware of your deepest secrets. There are bags under his eyes, surely from having to balance Astarion’s less-than-likable presence with all his other responsibilities in rebuilding the city. A part of you feels guilty for the work you’ve dropped on him, but both parties know it’s for the best.

It’s been made glaringly obvious that you and Astarion shouldn’t be anywhere around one another. It’s only a recipe destined to end in a yelling match or…

Your cheeks flare. Last night was a mistake. It won’t happen again.

“We’ll keep him here. Lock him in his room like Shadowheart said,” You finally blurt. “Can you send the invitation back with everyone who’s going? I have someone to visit in a few minutes.”

“Very well,” the cleric smiles, obviously pleased with your decision. Gale only frowns. “I’m glad that’s settled.”

So are you.

You hear the door of Astarion’s room open upstairs and decide you shouldn’t stay any longer. After rushing goodbyes to your companions and another questioning glance from Gale, you scramble to fly out of the house, barely grabbing your bag in the process. The contents weigh more heavily than they usually do, and for good reason. Hopefully, younger vampires feed less than fully grown ones because otherwise, the squirrel you found the night before won’t be able to satiate Berry’s appetite.

It’s hard not to wonder how she’s doing for most of your day. You were initially planning to visit her last night until the unfortunate ambush Petras released onto your already sore limbs. Even now, you constantly rub at the ache of your thighs and arms. The healing potions did plenty, but they couldn’t do everything.

She must be starving, you think. You grit your teeth.

Fortunately for you, however, when you arrive at the Highberry residence, Berry seems perfectly fine. In fact, she’s helping her adopted siblings arrange decorative plants around the house, likely to liven up the place after what’s been happening the past few months. There’s a sense of calm here that doesn’t currently exist in your own household. The scene makes a soft smile pull at your lips, which is more than welcome.

“You didn’t visit last night,” the young girl finally says when you’re with her by the window, far enough from the siblings to be out of earshot. She looks up at you sheepishly. “I thought you might’ve gotten attacked.”

She picks at her fingers.

“Were you worried?” you stifle a laugh, and she shrugs, albeit flustered. “I brought you some—prey. You must be hungry.”

“Not really,” she still takes the worn sack and clutches it close to her. “I went out to find food by myself.”

At this, your eyes widen. “What? You left for the forest? You know that place is dangerous, Berry; it’s not safe for someone as young as you.”

“I’m a spawn. It’s probably safer for me than you,” she squints, and you can’t bring yourself to deny it.

“...You’re still a child,” you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Where’d you learn to hunt anyway? The last time I checked, you could barely fight off a few forest animals.”

Her face flushes red, but she huffs regardless. “The haggard taught me.”

“Hag?...”

“Your friend,” Berry perches either of her arms on the windowsill, staring out at the passing civilians on the street. She whips her head to you and points at either of her fangs, opening wide. “He’s been teaching me to hunt with these.”

“Astarion?” you blink. “He taught you? Willingly?”

It’s rather hard to believe.

“No, I had to follow him. By the time he noticed, he didn’t have much of a choice,” she says proudly, puffing out her chest. Then she deflates again as if she just tasted something sour. “He got two big bears last night but wouldn’t share…So, I had to get my own squirrels because he told me I’d starve otherwise. That old hoot is selfish and mean.”

Well, it certainly sounds like him.

“You could’ve gotten hurt,” you scold her gently.

“Maybe by him.”

You want to say that she’s wrong and that Astarion wouldn’t hurt her, but the blasted comb flashes back in your mind, and reality sits heavy in your throat. So, instead, you bite your tongue.

“Have you found any of them yet? The other spawn?” she pushes herself off the wall to stand straight.

“I did—if fighting them counts.”

Her face falls and a part of you regrets even alluding to what happened last night. She begins to fidget with the sharp ends of her nails again and stares at your shoes. “There’s too many of them.”

You’d most certainly know.

“We have the Fist fighting for us,” you assure her, albeit pathetically. Even in your own ears, you don’t sound entirely confident. “And besides, the murder count has been decreasing as of late. If we keep going at this rate, we won’t have more than a body every two weeks—”

“It won’t work that way, though. They’ll just keep coming back.”

Were children always this perceptive?

You’re not sure what to say.

She clenches her fists. “Not all of them are bad, you know.”

“I know, Berry. You’re not a bad person at all; it’s just that—”

“I meant the siblings,” she blurts, finally meeting your eyes. “Aurora…she was nice. She was nothing like Petras.”

Aurora?

You’re suddenly leaning down to her, shoulders tense. “You’ve met the other siblings? Since when?”

“Only once, months ago. Petras tried to convince the others to stay here with him, but they said no,” her brows furrow. “He was furious that day.”

Of course. Why didn’t you realize that earlier? Petras, Dalyria, and Leon were the only ones of the main spawn that remained in the city, and being so swept up with their antics, you’d forgotten to ponder on the motivations of the others. You swallow the dry lump in your throat as realization slaps you across the face.

“So not all of them want to go through with the ascension?” you gasp. Berry pauses but nods slowly.

Help. You could ask them for help. Surely, if they don’t want another Cazador running rampant in the city, they’d be willing to stop the ritual as a whole. You gnaw at the inside of your cheek as your mind races. Were they even aware of what Petras was up to? How many lives he’d taken?

You take her hands to stop her from picking at them, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “Berry, where are the other siblings?”

“They told Petras they were leaving for the Underdark like they promised you.”

Gods, bless this girl. Somehow, she’s been more helpful than any other resource you’ve had the past few months—including the Duke, and your vampire spawn. You’d think she might be a blessing from the heavens if it weren’t for all the other bullshit they’ve thrown your way as of late.

“Tell Cora I dropped by,” you smile brightly. Though it’s rare nowadays, you feel almost hopeful. “I’ll come back in a week. Stay put until then.”

By the time you realize how much time has passed being cooped up on your bedroom floor, the sun is already setting. You reach for a candle, flicking a match against the box before lighting a flame to illuminate the pages sprawled around you. In anyone else’s eyes, you might look nearly hysterical, but to you, it feels as if the weight of the entire city is on your shoulders again. In a way, you suppose it is. Unless you want more than just a couple dozen bodies on the city streets in a few months, that is.

Your eyes scan over Dalyria’s drawings for what seems like the millionth time. And for the millionth time, you find nothing. Since the last time you obsessed over her journal, there have been a few additions to your collection: some books on ascension, vampires, and, for some reason, a book on vampire lords.

You’re not sure you see the point in picking up this particular book, considering the spawns’ master is long dead, which means none of them can become a true vampire unless they were to ascend—the exact scenario you’re trying to prevent. But perhaps spending an entire day at the library blossomed a newfound curiosity within you.

There isn’t much in there you don’t already know from first-hand accounts Astarion would recall on the nights you couldn’t fall asleep. There are parts, however, regarding the vampire spawn they can compel that lure your attention.

“Vampire spawn were the masters of stealth and charismatic cunning,” you read mindlessly. “...vampire spawn would seek vengeance on their creators.”

Vengeance. Is that what it was when he tried to strangle you?

Your jaw clenches, and you feel a sort of buzzing on your lips. What an asshole.

Quickly, you shut the book with a slam as you decide that dwelling on information you’re already well accustomed to is a waste of time. You’d likely be a better source of knowledge than the book itself because of how basic its contents tend to be.

You stare at the cover, which simply illustrates a set of fangs. Cliche, you think, but it’s effective.

The room suddenly feels too quiet.

Fortunately, the uncomfortably loud growling of your stomach snaps you out of your trance.

Shoving the book under your bed, you swing the door to your room open to pace to the kitchen. Hopefully, there’s some dinner left over from last night—-worst-case scenario, you have to eat one of those days-old fruits gathered in the bowl on the counter. You don’t have much time to ponder, though, because you hear a familiar groan from downstairs as soon as you reach the top of the stairs.

“Will you please stop leaving dead animals in the cabinet? As grateful as I am that you’re feeding on them rather than our friends, it bloody reeks, Astarion!”

Shit.

Astarion stares up at you with wide eyes on his way up to his room while you blink down at him wearily. Gale continues to mutter mindlessly about whatever trouble the spawn has caused in his sacred kitchen, but Astarion doesn’t seem to pay him any heed. You feel naked under his gaze, but you think putting on at least four more layers of clothing wouldn’t even scratch the surface of how you feel.

“Good morning,” he blurts.

He never greets you. Not like this, anyway.

It’s not even morning.

Fortunately, he looks just as confused at his words as you do.

Searching for a response that won’t come to you, you refer to the lamest solution. A scapegoat, if you will. “I need to walk past you.”

Astarion immediately nods. “Right. Yes, of course.”

He stands to one side of the narrow stairs, and you cautiously squeeze past him. Has it always been this much of a struggle to fit two people on the stairs? It’s terribly awkward as you shuffle by, holding the air in your lungs in hopes that he doesn’t recognize how uneven your breath is. You’re sure he does, but it was worth a try anyway.

Suddenly, Gale is standing at the bottom of the stairs in front of you.

“Where are you going? I thought you needed a healing potion for your stomach,” he aims at Astarion with a raised brow.

The said spawn coughs. You almost choke on the air. “No, I—I’m alright now.”

“Are you sure? That bruise was pretty nasty, my friend. Letting something like that fester will surely only hinder you…”

Astarion closes the door to his room. Slams, more like.

You glance at Gale pitifully, who only crosses his arms with a sigh as he turns to return to the kitchen. “He’s moodier than I was when I was going through puberty.”

Wordlessly, you trail behind him until he resumes whatever dish he’s cooking up inside a pot while you reach for an apple. There’s a comfortable silence as you perch yourself on the counter, legs gently swinging as you chew, cringing whenever you feel a mushier part of the fruit. Gale lifts his ladle to his nose and takes a quick sniff before nodding in satisfaction. He then puts the lid over the pot.

“I’ve never seen Astarion as awkward as he was earlier,” he comments, and you cough.

“He wasn’t that charming in the first place,” you grumble.

“I never said he was charming. Just that he isn’t awkward.”

“Maybe he’s still drunk from last night,” you scoff, blood boiling at the mere thought of how he acted. A strange sense of pride spreads through you, knowing you hit him hard enough to do some damage, but you still think you could’ve hit harder. All those months pent up should’ve garnered far more strength, surely.

“Or perhaps it’s from the kiss.”

You do choke on your apple this time.

After you wheeze out whatever apple chunks were lodged in your throat, your head whips in the wizard’s direction. “Gale, you–”

“It wasn’t voluntary, I’ll have you know,” he cuts in, crossing his arms. “I just happened to leave one of my books on the couch, which I only wished to retrieve for my nightly routine of reading at least 100 pages.”

You’re at a loss for words. Your face deepens in color, even as you beg it not to.

“I, of course, being the most fortunate lad I am, had to walk into the room when his tongue was halfway down your throat.”

You nearly shriek. “There was no tongue!”

“Well, that’s certainly a relief!” he laughs. “I likely would have had to pry my eyes out with one of Lae’zel’s swords otherwise!”

On any other occasion, you’d bite back at him, but you’re too busy drowning in your own humiliation to register half of his words. A blessing and a curse in this case.

“It didn’t mean anything!” you blurt, even though he never really asked. “It was—he kissed me. I punched him afterward, too.”

Gale raises a brow. “Really? It appeared to me that you were kissing back, though it might have just been the angle. Quite passionately, too, but that might’ve been the trick of the light…”

You slap your palms over your ears, praying to the gods that he shut his mouth for once in his damn life. “It didn’t mean anything!”

“Does he know that?”

“He hates me! And he’s kissed hundreds of people—I doubt one stupid kiss even bothers him.”

“Yes, but it’s a kiss from you. His ex-lover,” Gale shoots back. “And he doesn’t seem unbothered. Neither of you do.”

“So what?” You know exactly what, but it’s difficult to acknowledge at the moment.

“Tav,” Gale says carefully. “If you’ve—by any chance—begun to grow accustomed to his presence again…and I don’t blame you at all, by the way. I’ve become rather fond myself of forcing him to listen to magic lectures that nobody else is willing to listen to; however…if it’s becoming something more on your end–”

“It’s not,” your tone is more stern this time. Colder. “It never will be.”

“Really?”

“Do I need to punch him again for you to believe me?”

“That’s not quite what I’m getting at. I just witnessed the tension between the two of you, and it would be irresponsible of me as a friend if we didn’t work through what you’re feeling before things start to get out of hand.”

You groan, throwing your hands in the air. “There is no tension, Gale!”

“Now now, I might not be the most experienced out of all of us in romantic affairs, but I’ve had my fair share of them. With a goddess, no less! It would be wise if you heeded my advice and discussed what the kiss meant to both of yo–”

You clap a hand over his mouth, words gritting through your teeth. “Stop saying it!”

His response comes out muffled against your palm.

“Fine, I’ll talk to him. I’ll go up to him right now and tell him how I’ll bury him alive if he tries anything again. Would that be enough to shut you up?”

Gale smiles. You don’t return it.

The angry march up to Astarion’s room should’ve been enough to wake up your other companions, but it doesn’t. You knock heavily on his door, foot tapping impatiently as you glare at Gale, who stands halfway up the stairs, grinning from ear to ear in a pathetic attempt to be encouraging. It only makes you want to shrink into your shirt.

When Astarion fails to answer after multiple knocks, you decide you have no time for this. “I’m coming in. Please don’t be naked.”

The door doesn’t even have a lock. His room is empty except for the cold air that hits your cheeks. You realize that the window is swung wide open, allowing the moonlight to pour onto the wooden floors where he’s left his cloak in favor of what you assume to be usual nightwear. You pull the door behind you and cautiously step into his room, eyes glazing over the rest. It’s a stark contrast from your own. Despite how much time he spends in it, there isn’t a speck of dust or an article of laundry where it shouldn’t be. His bed is neatly made, his chair pushed into his desk, and if it weren’t for his books organized on his desk, you’d think nobody even lives here.

You slowly inch toward the window, running your fingertips over his books. They’re worn but somehow still well taken care of. You can feel how old they are, yet their pages remain perfectly intact, without a single crease on any corners.

When you reach the window, you finally notice the vines growing on the sides of the building that protrude just over the window sill. You hear soft thumps from the ceiling, resembling the pace of his footsteps. Or at least, what do you think they’d sound like if he made any sounds while walking.

The asshole knows you’re here. Of course, he does.

With a wary glance at the vines, you firmly grip both hands on the roots and slowly lift yourself off the windowsill. Thankfully, the stones making up the building make for good boosters to haul you up toward the rooftop, even though your instincts suggest you’d likely fall and die an unfortunate death here. Still, somehow, you manage to haul yourself onto the roof's edge with a final groan.

You slump rather unceremoniously onto the angled edge, and the slight snicker from the other occupant of the space doesn’t go unnoticed. You glare at him, and Astarion only grins, leaning back on both elbows. “Should I have lent you a hand?”

“I can climb a wall, thanks,” you snap, crawling to a spot that allows you to lie back and stay a generous distance away from the vampire spawn. The tiles of the roof feel cool against your skin. From only two stories up, you can see a full four streets further than you usually can from your window, where only a few people now shuffle through the city given the time of night. While you think it should be peaceful here, all you can focus on is the undead individual lying a good few feet away from you, staring up at the sky rather than the city.

“As much as I enjoy all the colorful insults you throw at me, I was hoping for some peace tonight,” he finally says.

“This is my rooftop that I paid for. I’ll go where I please.”

Astarion sighs, his eyes still gazing up at the stars. “Then to what do I owe the pleasure of your presence tonight? If it’s about the dead animals, I’ve already told Gale I’d store them outside from now on—”

“Last night didn’t happen.”

There. It’s like a weight off your chest. At least, it should feel that way.

He stops, moving to stare from the stars to you. “And since when could you manipulate the very essence of time?”

“Don’t get smart with me unless you want another repeat of yesterday. Maybe I’ll knock out a fang this time,” you hiss.

“The damage you’ve done to my stomach is plenty. Thank you, darling,” he frowns. “And if I may: It isn’t completely fair to place all the blame on me, is it? I might’ve been intoxicated, but I wasn’t deranged enough to miss the way you kissed me back. Aggressively, might I add?”

You roll your eyes. “I was trying to bite your lip off.”

“I would believe you if you hadn’t made such teasing sounds when I bit back.”

This boils your blood just enough for you to tear your gaze away from him and back onto the city. “Just forget it happened.”

“Must I?”

“Yes! It was clearly a lapse of judgment!”

“It was,” he affirms. From the corner of your eye, you can see him put his chin against the palm perched on his elbow, fully turning on his side to face you. “An exciting one. I thought I knew you well enough that I could trust you would never kiss me again.”

You glower. “I was bleeding half to death—I was barely conscious. For all I know, I thought you might’ve been someone else.”

You can both hear the obvious lie in the statement, but neither points it out.

“I do wish you’d stop doing that,” he mutters, staring through lidded eyes. “It’s hard not to pay you any attention when you constantly smell like fresh bait. It’s like seeing an entire feast before you but being unable to have a taste.”

“Yes, because I wanted to get attacked by your brother.”

“Right. That.”

He stares up at the sky again. Hells, if he stares any harder, you’d think his damn eyeballs would fall out. His white curls blow gently against the breeze, and from here, it appears like nighttime was really made for him. Or do all vampires just glow during the night?

“For all it is, I’m truly sorry.”

Your eyes resemble barrels as you turn to look at him. He’s now occupied with his hands—those flawless hands of his that, by some miracle, don't have a single scar on them even after all the two of you have been through. Those very same hands you’ve once loved and that you’ve grown to hate.

“I, of all people, should know what it feels like to have someone forced upon me. And if I had any sort of control over my body at the time, I assure you what happened last night wouldn’t have happened.”

Though it’s not the main point of his apology, you find yourself focusing on the implications. He would’ve never kissed you if he was sober. You know this—you’ve known this—so why you’re so preoccupied by this confession, you have no idea. Internally kicking yourself, you steel your mind to remain calm. He hates you. You hate him. Simple. You only notice, moments later, that he’s still talking.

“---and I’m aware we aren’t on good terms,” he says, softer. “But that doesn’t mean I’ll stoop down to the levels of the dirtbags I had to deal with for two centuries. I might have questionable morals about all else, but in that aspect, I’m unlike them.”

Still wide and unblinking, your eyes slowly relax as you soak in his words. It’s been a while since you’ve heard him so sincere (in a manner that isn’t insulting), and it feels like a breath of fresh air. For a moment, you want to deceive yourself that you’d never reached Baldur’s Gate. That you and your companions are still camping in the woods, and Astarion is still only learning to care for another. That he never went to Cazador’s palace, and you never needed to stop the ascension.

You would’ve indulged in such fantasies months ago, but now, they feel too artificial to derive joy from them. They feel too hollow. Fake. Like biting into a poisoned apple. You can sense him waiting for your response, and it takes a moment, but you manage to mumble it out. “It’s fine. I did kiss you back. We were both not in our right minds. Just…forget it happened.”

You don’t know how to decipher the look in his eyes, but you’ve long given up on how to do it in the first place. Because every time you think you finally understand him, it turns out to be a mask or a plot to deceive you. And every time, you don’t see it coming. It’s better not to try at all because it means he has no way to lie to you in the first place.

“Very well,” he says numbly. “It never happened.”

Both your heads turn to look up at the dark sky. The stars twinkle overhead, glistening in their own respectful glories. There’s one in particular that shines the brightest, floating right beside another that dims compared to all the other stars. It seems to drag behind the brighter star like a shadow, always following but never truly acknowledged.

You pity it.

“Why did you quit music?” he asks suddenly. “I thought it was…your passion.”

“I can’t see the beauty in it anymore,” you say simply.

Astarion hums. “A shame. I was rather fond of your lyre.”

The brightest star almost appears to move again. The darker one trails right behind.

You raise your brow. “Is this where you run off to every night? To stargaze? It’s pretty, but doesn’t it get boring?”

“It’s not pretty at all, darling,” he grins, attention never leaving the sky. “I watch every night, hoping that the dimmer star dies out before the brighter one notices it’s there.”

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byoldervine · 1 year ago

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Motivation For Writing

Getting Off Your Butt:

1. Aestheticise it. Let the light in through the curtains, turn on your fairy lights, lay a blanket over your lap, light some candles, whatever you need to do to feel like a writer. The right vibes can go a long way

2. Picture that one scene. There’s almost always a moment you’re super excited about that basically inspired the whole book. Picture it, play it out in your head in full cinematic fanfare, gush to yourself about how cool it is and how everyone will love it, picture a future fanbase going nuts for it. You might get excited enough to go back to writing

3. Set a word count goal. During NaNoWriMo this year I think I wrote more than I ever have in one go. The thing that kept me coming back was the desire to not fall behind. I ended up with ~45K words after some complications irl caused me to drop off in the final few days, and that’s all just because I was adding up the 1667 a day word count goal and realising where I needed to be at to keep up. I definitely can’t stay as rigid as I did with 1667 words every single day, but seeing that you’re only a few hundred words off of a goal is super motivating - just be sure to set realistic, easy to achieve parameters for just general use, like 1000-2000 words per week. I know 200 words per day is a popular one for people trying to establish a writing routine that can’t dedicate forever to the craft

Maintaining Motivation:

1. Writing sprints. Writing sprints are a godsend for me, I like to set myself up in the living room with Abbie Emmons’ writing sprint video on. The video lasts two hours and is broken up into two parts; 25 minutes to write and 5 minutes for breaks between writing, so four 30 minute sprints overall. Having the timer and countdown with peaceful music and an aesthetic background is both relaxing and encouraging, as well as giving me a specific time for how much longer I have to push through. It’s easier for me to say “Okay, only ten more minutes, then you can take a break” then it is to say “Just keep going, we’re not stopping until I say so” which is too arbitrary for my brain to accept

2. Give yourself a choice. If you’re struggling to keep your focus, come up with a finish line and tell yourself you don’t have to do any more work once you’ve reached that point. Finish the paragraph, go for another five or ten minutes, keep it up until your next scheduled break. Whatever sounds realistic and doable without being overwhelming. And once you’ve met this goal, ask yourself if you still want to stop. With any luck, you’ll have gotten back into the zone and will choose to keep going. Maybe you’ll want to take a quick break but you’ll come back later on. And maybe you’ll decide that now actually is a good stopping point. Just remember that, if you do still want to stop, don’t force yourself to keep going. You can’t strike deals with yourself if you know you won’t keep your word and all you’ll end up doing is burning yourself out, which will lead to even less writing getting done

3. Try a new angle. If you can’t be bothered to write anymore, is there anything else you can do for your book? Plotting, editing, worldbuilding, character sheets, one-shots all that sort of thing can still be productive for your book while still being different enough to give your brain a slight respite. It also means less work in that particular area later on

Afterwards:

1. Organise. Clean up your workspace and put everything away so it’s nice and neat for when you come back to it. Or if you don’t need to pack things out the way, set it up in an aesthetically pleasing way so it will tempt you back next time. Let it give you the writer vibe

2. Take care of yourself. Get a drink, have a snack, walk about, stretch your limbs, take a breath, cuddle your pet. Something that gets you away from straining your eyes looking at text for a bit. This is also a good time to reward yourself if positive reinforcement is something you use on yourself. If you always feel shitty after your writing sessions, you won’t want to go back to it

3. Positive reflection. Make sure to tell yourself you did good, even if you didn’t get as much done as you would’ve liked or it isn’t up to a standard of quality you’re aiming for. That can all be fixed later on, and you’re infinitely better off than you would’ve been if you didn’t do it. Be proud of yourself. Tell yourself you’re proud of your hard work and your dedication and your effort. Remind yourself that this is a fun thing you like to do. Marvel over how insane it is that you’ve gotten this far - not many people do - and that you’ve got all this tangible work to prove you’ve accomplished something so many people wish they could pull off. If this isn’t fun overall, there’s no point

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gulliblelemon · 4 months ago

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Young Royals Fic Recommendations 5

Find previous lists here: 1, 2, 3, 4

And weather fic lists here.

I also have my own fics here.

running with wolves by intothelight @enjoythesilentworld 28k words. WIP. Rating E. Wilhelm and Simon are on two sides of a war on drugs and corruption and greed. And yet, they just can’t seem to stay away from each other. (Honourable mention to call ur crush! by the same author).

Met You At The Right Time by itsme_hi_imtheproblem @iwouldnevergetintofanfic 45k words. Complete. Rating M. When their kids get into a fight at school, single dads Simon and Wille are brought together at a meeting with the teacher. As the experienced professional that she is, she suggests a joint craft activity to repair the damage that was caused. Both Wille and Simon expect sticky paste fingers and potential meltdowns but surprisingly enough discover that they have more in common than they thought. Their friendship starts out easy, yet the growing attraction between them threatens to make things a whole lot more complicated. (Honourable mention to Crossing Lines by the same author).

Sabotage by @dreamyelectronicmusic 419 words. Complete. Rating G. A moment on a balcony at a party where Simon's boyfriend confronts Wilhelm. “I see the way you look at him,” a voice startles Wille out of his reverie, “when you think he can’t see you.”

land between our bodies by phnelt @phneltwrites 95k words. Complete. Rating E. Simon holds up his phone on his notes app. He’s been brainstorming. It reads: Hi, Wilhelm. Sorry to message you but I’m having a situation at school with some bullies that I could use your help with. I get if you don’t want to. Thanks. An exes fake dating fic. (Honourable mentions to joy that lights the fire and this life’s for you go outside by the same author).

come closer and see into the dark by @bigalockwood 52k words. Complete. Rating M. A ghost pandemic has descended over Europe, the dead back from their restless sleep to haunt the living. When a case goes horribly wrong, Wilhelm’s agency is thrust into a fight against an unknown opponent – and suddenly, staying alive seems harder than ever. If only Simon cared a little less whether stupid Wilhelm lived or died.

your breath lives in mine, even if it’s been a while by allforyoumylove 45k words. Complete. Rating E. Wilhelm isn’t sure exactly when he fell in love with his best friend. All he knows is that it’s taken root deep inside him, that he loves Simon always and unwaveringly, even when he hates everything else. But the timing is cruel. He’s found what he wants, only for it to slip away before he gets the chance to hold on.

If only you dared to watch by @larrylover3000 24k words. Complete. Rated M. A school camp takes them to the woods, leaving Wilhelm face to face with his sexual awakening - and it’s not pretty.

Never Not You by @pagegirlintraining 81k words. Complete. Rating E. It's been twelve years since Wille publicly denied being in a viral sex tape with Simon, and they've been great friends for years. While Simon's in a committed, long-term relationship and his dreams of becoming a successful musician finally seem to be within reach, Wille's still struggling with his fate of being the Crown Prince, and everything that means for his love life. When nothing goes as planned for Simon, though, and friendly comfort turns into more, how will they cope with the consequences? And what if Wille's been keeping a secret from Simon all these years that might very well destroy whatever it is they have? (Honourable mention to Missing you missing me by the same author).

Now we’re falling like snow by @skibasyndrome 7.8k words. Complete. Rating E. The first heavy snow of the season - what a great opportunity for a slow morning and keeping each other warm.

Fools in a Fable by @unfortunate17 39k words. Complete. Rating E. Simon, a journalist at a left-wing magazine, eagerly accepts the chance of a lifetime to write a scathingly honest piece about the newly crowned King Wilhelm, who has a history shrouded in parties, drugs, and gay allegations. His plans, however, go to shit when he realizes that Wilhelm is nothing like he expected.

Can I be close to you? by @vvachillessongvv 1.4k words. Complete. Rating G. Sitting on the sofa they've sat on together a thousand times before, Wille realizes he's in love with his best friend. (Honourable mention to lovers & friends by the same author).

futile devices by @jordensgolde 73k words. WIP. Rating E. Wilhelm is caught in a consuming infatuation with someone who can never truly be his. Struggling to reconcile his feelings, he tries to ignore the longing, but it lingers, a constant ache beneath the surface. Meanwhile, Simon is overwhelmed by the burdens of his work and the unresolved ghosts of his past, leaving little room for anything else. As he navigates his tangled emotions, love seems like the last thing on his mind — until, perhaps, it isn’t.

Falling in Love is a Full-Time Job by signedmeraki @invisiblewille 4.3k words. Complete. Rating T. Wille and Simon are colleagues and roommates and it feels like there's always been... something between them.

The honeymoon suite by @stretchoutfics 14k words. Complete. Rating E. Wille is stuck up in the far north doing his military service, Simon in Stockholm studying. They've come to an arrangement about how they're going to handle their relationship while they can't be together: they're no longer exclusive. After three months apart, Wille has a weekend's leave and they can finally see each other again. They have a lot to talk about. Amongst other things.

#yr fic rec #yr fanfic #young royals #wilmon #gulliblelemon #lemon recommends #yr fanfiction #young royals fanfic

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ckret2 · 8 months ago

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If I’m right, since last part was part five, does that mean there’s only two more parts left of the axolotl/backstory arc before we’re sent back to the present? I’ve really been loving the lore we’ve been getting, but I must admit i feel a mighty need, to not just see present bill again, but the pines as well.

The number of chapters the plot arc will be is my best guess based on how much I've posted, how much I've written but not posted, and how much I THINK I still need to write.

My first draft of this plot arc was 5600 words.

When I started rewriting it, I thought "I can probably keep it around 10k, maybe 15k maximum."

It is currently 45k and unfinished.

Don't trust anything I tell you about how many parts are left.

All I can tell you, right now at this exact moment in time on the afternoon of Saturday November 10, is there are AT LEAST three more chapters. I'm probably wrong.

#rainbow beanie #ask #bill goldilocks cipher

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applysome · 12 days ago

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You’ve Always Been Here

Chapter Six - I Need You

Pairing: Miles Kane/Alex Turner

Rating: Explicit (... yes)

Word Count: 11,253

Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Mutual Pining, Second Chance Romance, Regret, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Smut, Praise Kink, Happy Ending, Cute, Sharing a Bed, Pining, The Car era Alex, One Man Band era Miles, Longing, Feelings, Maxie has more brain cells than Miles and Alex combined, Second half of the story has been beta read - we’re no longer floundering

Chapter Summary: Miles reaches boiling point with Alex - will Maxie be able to save the day?

The final chapter is here! This was supposed to be a short comfort fic that probably wouldn't get posted, to help me work through some personal stuff. But of course it ended up growing to over 45k words, which isn't surprising when I start writing about feelings 🙈

Not only is it the longest thing I've ever written and finished, it's been with me all through my recovery so it holds a special place in my heart 💖

It might also be the best thing I've ever written...

Huge thanks to @uhbasicallyjustmilex for being a wonderful beta that corrects a million stupid mistakes, suggesting I write this kind of fic in the first place to work through some stuff and for being an all around amazing person – you have my endless gratitude 💜

As always, comments mean the absolute world if you would like to leave one ✨ (but there is absolutely no obligation, reading and enjoying is more than enough! 🌈)

Anyway, enough waffle – the link is up there if you want to read!

If you do, I hope you enjoy 💜

#i may have a short follow up in the works about an amazing idea from @daddy-long-legsss – thank you 💖#i may also be considering writing another follow up relating to something in the chapter – details in the end notes #i will not be commenting on the size of my WIP/draft folder at this time lol #but they will all get written at some point i'm sure #genuinely really surprised and grateful for the response my little story has received #thank you so so much to everyone who has read or commented or left kudos #i know i'm repeating myself but i can't help it and the post was probably too long as it was #ahhhhhhh describes my excitement and feelings in general at being able to share the story in its entirety #i'll shut up now don't worry #alex turner #miles kane #milex #tlsp #milex fic #milex fanfiction #my fic #my writing #arctic monkeys #the last shadow puppets

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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AITA for not wanting to get a better job?

I (20s F) work at a job related to my degree that earns a salary of $45k a year. I’m not really invested in my job, it’s boring office work, and as it’s a small company, there’s not much opportunity for growth aside from yearly raises to match inflation. My true love is writing, and I feel comfortable with my job and our finances that I don’t need to aspire higher in a demanding career that will distract from my writing ambitions.

My husband (20s M) has always been way more financially minded than me. He’s getting a masters in finance and works as an investment banker. He has moved up the ranks at his job and currently earns $60kish with promises that upon certain milestones, that pay will increase to $80k, $90k, and so on. Between the two of us we make around $100k. Despite this, he constantly brings up that I’m not ambitious enough, I rely on him to do all the heavy lifting for our finances, and am settling when I’m smart and could get a better job. But as previously noted, I do have ambitions, they just don’t involve getting a secure office job that earns me a ton of cash (that I’d probably have to get a second degree to even be capable of being hired anyway since with my current credentials this is about as much as I can get).

So basically, I told him that I AM contributing, even if it’s not as much as he wants, and I’m comfortable where we’re at (he dreams of traveling and having fancy stuff which i don’t really care about, but to achieve that it requires me to contribute more. I once told him I don’t want to sacrifice my dream of being an author to achieve his dream of being super rich).

Anyway, we stopped talking about this much because we can never agree, and he gets annoyed when I work on my books because he sees it as a time sync that’s taking time away from him and time I could spend on a “real career.” Sometimes I feel like he just wants me to not write and do nothing with him, as if denying myself of what I want to do will be proof that I love him most. Anyway. Am i the asshole here? Am I selfish, and should I be contributing more?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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itficlibrary · 4 months ago

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This Week's Theme is hurt/comfort fics!

the following are fics where the main theme/one of the main themes is hurt/comfort. remember to check the tags and leave a comment on your favourites.

For fans of eddie angst and hope in spite of the pain, try:

filthy/unwell by thatmalu

(2.6k words)

a steddie (stanley x eddie) fic wherein stan cleans eddie up after a homophobic assault, and they unpack their respective feelings about homophobia and eventually each other. soft, tender vibes and classic hurt/comfort goodness in this fic. it does discuss child abuse so please take care!

For fans of second chances & healing, try:

make this cold world beautiful (with every seed you sow) by nondz (pinkjook)

(20.8k words)

a touching stanpat fic that sees stan and patty’s reunion after stan is brought back from the dead. the main ship’s lovestory is so powerful in this and it also features peeling + feeding oranges as an expression of love.

For fans of depressed Richie & forcing that man to recognise he is cared about, try:

fall apart or stay intact by kaspbrak_kid

(19.2k words)

This is a holiday fic but still a perfect & comforting read year round! Follows a seasonally depressed Richie as he and Eddie stumble through confessing their feelings for each other, with a wonderful first kiss and so much Richie-learning-he-is-loved-and-worthy deliciousness.

For fans of teen fic & role reversal, try:

down my arms, a thousand satellites by rosemallows

(6.5k words)

A cozy, gently angsty coming of age fic set just after Eddie gets his cast taken off, where he accidentally injures himself on broken glass. Takes the trope of Eddie fixing up Richie and reverses it, shows a realistic panic attack and generally does confusing teenage emotions lots of justice.

For fans of Eddie taking care of Richie in his time of need & deadlights lore, try:

In case of emergency contact E. Kaspbrak by stitchy

(6.3k words)

This fic is just a pure pick me up. It follows Richie and (alive!) Eddie after the events of IT 2, after discovering the deadlights have left Richie temporarily blind. Featuring cute & shatteringly in character banter, lots of hospital trips and Eddie taking extra close care of Richie.

For fans of famous Richie and reddie being so sickeningly in love, try:

Richie Tozier: Weirdos, Clowns, and Bozos by witchietozier

(16.3k words)

A super fluffy & satisfying look at reddie’s relationship as adults, particularly the craziness of Richie being famous within that dynamic. We’re treated to a full Richie comedy set, touchy feely benchie best friendship, and Eddie the world’s best most comforting boyfriend!

For the fans of quintessential fix-it and tender eddie-in-the-hospital scenes, try:

in the morning by fe3hlix

(3.3k words)

A good old-fashioned, reddie-hospital-confession fix it, published right after IT 2019 came out! Featuring emotionally wrecked crybaby Richie & various losers keeping a careful eye on him, and book accurate amputee eddie.

For fans of teen Losers and insecurity, try:

Beep Beep by itried

(3.1k words)

After the events of It Chapter One, Pennywise still haunts Richie, convincing him that his friends hate him and that it would be better if he just stopped speaking. Happy ending where the Losers comfort Richie < 3

For fans of explicit fic, try:

digging out the bullet and holding it up to the light by seeingrightly

(45k words)

The day before they arrive in Derry, Richie and Eddie meet in a hotel bar and sleep together. When they remember each other, they have to figure out how to deal with not only Pennywise, but also each other.

For fans of post chapter two caregiving fics, try:

up off the floor by kaspbrak_kid

(15.3k words)

A classic post chapter two confession fic where Richie cares for an injured Eddie. They talk and work through their feelings and are just in general super cute!

For fans of highly stylised fics, try:

trashmouth for sale, gently used by stitchy

(19.4k words)

Bev ropes Richie into being auctioned off as a bachelor for charity. Eddie has a lot of feelings about it, and none of them are simple or easy to deal with. The style in this fic is amazing!

For fans of emotionally constipated Eddie, try:

The places you will be from by glorious_spoon

(15k words)

After the events of chapter two, Eddie has to deal with all the feelings that arise. Even worse, he has to actually talk about them instead of just stewing in them like usual.

For fans of communication and fics that'll get you in your feels, try:

A new philosophy by dizzy

(2.7k words)

Eddie survives the events of chapter two, but only just barely, and Richie has to come to terms with that.

For fans of Eddie comforting Richie, try:

live on your wire by glorious_spoon

(3k words)

Post the events of chapter two, Eddie comforts Richie during a nightmare. Super sweet fic!

Sorry to be late with posting this, we've both been super busy TToTT

Also! Posting for the It Valentines Collab is ongoing, be sure to keep an eye on the collection!

#themed lists #hurt/comfort #reddie #it fanfiction #it stephen king #it 2017 #it 2019 #it chapter 1 #it chapter 2 #it chapter one #it chapter two

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hlficlibrary · 1 year ago

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HL Fic Library 💙 Disabled Character Fics

Remember to leave kudos and a comment on the fics you enjoyed to show your appreciation! You can find the library's other recs here.

✨ Take My Breath Away by @realitybetterthanfiction {E, 153k}

There is a prestigious school in the British Royal Navy classified as Premier Delta - or as it is known by its flyers, 1D. These select pilots are an elite set of Naval lieutenants who are trained in the skill of aggressive aerial combat. They are instruments of war, trained in times of peace. They are dogfighters, relentless and fearless in their mission to protect their beloved country. From their lofty vantage, they are always watching, waiting, and ready to lay it all on the line.

Lt. Harry Styles, call sign Sparrow, is a prodigy when it comes to flying. The owner of an unrivaled Naval pedigree, being a pilot was always written in the stars for Harry. With his trusty RIO, Lt. Niall Horan, Harry has made an unprecedented ascension in the ranks of the Naval aerial combat elite, and has been recruited to the esteemed Premier Delta flight school, carrying on his family’s legacy. What he finds there are unexpected friendships, perilous challenges, and something beyond what he ever thought possible. Because as his father had always told him, before the great Captain Styles went tragically missing in combat, you don’t fall in love with the sky, you fall in love with what keeps you on the ground.

✨ And What If I Were You by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom {E, 109k}

For Louis, will losing his sight give him the clarity to realise what is right in front of him?

For Harry, will losing the love of his life give him the strength to finally open his heart?

And can they find their way back, before they lose each other forever?

A story of love. A story of loss. A story of fighting for each other, no matter the odds.

✨ We're What's Right In This World by BriaMaria / @briannamarguerite {E, 48k}

“Why did you talk like that in Brighton? If you weren’t planning on ever telling me?” Louis asked. “Is it because you think you’re going to die?”

“It’s war, Lou,” Harry said finally.

The words were a knife slipped between his ribs. Everything hurt and he was bleeding. He shifted up, his palms cradling Harry’s jaw, his lips against his boy’s. Not kissing, just resting there, so Louis could feel him. “Promise you’ll come back to me.”

Harry’s hands smoothed down the sides of Louis’ body. “You know I can’t do that. I’ll never lie to you.”

“Promise me. We’re going to have our cottage. And our dogs. And our breakfast in the garden where nothing grows because of the wind from the sea. Promise me.”

“I won’t.” Stubborn as always, his boy. “I’ll promise you, I’ll love you all my life. I’ll promise you, you’ll never leave my thoughts. I’ll promise you, you’re my forever and my always. But promising you something I can’t cheapens the things I can.”

Or the World War II AU where Harry goes off to fight and all Louis wants to do is be the boy who brings him home.

✨ Seeing Blind by zedi {E, 46k}

Louis finally turns his head in Liam’s direction, knows his face is showing the longing he’s been aching with ever since it took root in his chest. “What the fuck do I do, Liam? He wouldn’t want me like that, but I want-” his voice cracks, and he turns his face back downwards. “What do you do when you’re not perfect for the person who’s perfect for you?”

OR the one where Harry’s an independent omega who likes to have his fun and Louis is the blind alpha that changes Harry’s priorities.

✨ It Feels Different When You’re With Me by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings {M, 45k}

Harry fell in love with sign language as a kid. He never imagined the first love of his life would lead him straight to his second.

✨ fondre ton absence by @scrunchyharry {T, 41k}

Harry had never really given much thought to the future. He preferred to let life steer him forward and to follow in the footsteps of Louis, his best friend from as far as his memory went, his lover, his everything. Louis knew better than he did what was good for him.

It changed drastically when Louis was ripped away from him, drafted and sent to the front to fight in a war that Harry had always been sure would never reach him. Too young and too sickly to follow, Harry was left on his own for the first time in his life.

When he thought things could not possibly get worse, Louis went missing at the Somme and was declared dead. While everyone buried and mourned him, Harry never moved on. If Louis were dead, he was sure that he would know it. Their lives were too entwined, he would know if half of his heart had died.

Determined to find Louis, Harry did everything he could in his quest to be reunited with him, except prepare for the state Louis might be in.

He did not prepare for the harsh truth he would have to face: was love possible without memories?

✨ Bitter Ends Turn Sweet by @allwaswell16 {E, 30k}

It had been four years since Harry first heard the song his ex wrote about him and far longer since they broke up. He forgave Louis long ago, and now his life was focused on his career, his family, and especially his son, Max. But Louis was back in Chicago, after all this time, and he’s not an easy man to ignore.

Or a songfic inspired by the song Chicago

✨ my strange girl by curlockholmes / @dykesteddie {E, 30k}

Harry works in a cafe kitchen; making bagels, snarking with Zayn, and generally trying to exist as an autistic girl working in hospitality.

Louis is the captain of the local women's rugby team who takes a shine to her.

✨ To Give You a Hand to Hold by gettingaphdinlarry {NR, 26k}

When he spoke again, Harry’s voice was low. “Ever think of how many birthdays they don’t get?”

Louis avoided Harry’s eyes. “What do you mean?”

“Martinez was what, nineteen? Missed a good sixty of them.” Harry took the last of his cake and passed the plate to Louis. “Figure sixty missed birthdays each. Just on our side. How many is that?”

Louis used the edge of his fork to scrape frosting off the plate. “Never thought about it.”

“What would your shrink say?”

“‘Focus on the positive.’”

Harry ran a hand over his head and scratched the back of his neck. “How’s that working?”

Marine Louis Tomlinson is medically discharged when an IED explodes in Afghanistan. Months later, he's reunited Stateside with his Navy medic Harry Styles. The two of them shelter each other even as they refuse to admit they're in the throes of PTSD, until one night nearly destroys them.

✨ the dead things we carry by MediaWhore / @mediawhorefics {M, 25k}

September ‘49 He hasn’t seen him since that day in France, that horrible muddy day where for one terrifyingly long second, Louis really thought he was going to die. He winces with the phantom pain, the hand not holding his cane going to his stomach automatically, remembering the franticness, the tenderness, of Harry’s hands while Louis was bleeding out.

This is the man who saved Louis’ life.

For one second, Louis fears Harry won’t recognise him, but his eyes widen when he turns to his left and they meet Louis’. He takes a step forward, reaching for him with a shaky hand before stopping himself.

“Louis,’ Harry says with a shudder and Louis doesn’t think his name has ever carried more weight.

This is the only man Louis ever thought about kissing for real.

“Oh,” Mrs. Padley says, clearly taken aback. “You two know each other?”

There are some things people never fully come home from. Until, one day, if they’re lucky, home comes to them.

✨ Don't Act Like It's a Bad Thing to Fall in Love by nightwideopen / @themarshalstale {G, 23k}

Louis was born blind, completely blind, leaving him with nothing but the absolute blackness that his lack of vision produces.

Harry, on the other hand, is deaf. No sound can be registered by the two tiny ears his rowdy, chocolate curls obscure so well.

The first time Louis and Harry meet, it’s sort of an accident.

✨ the sanctity of patience by @scrunchyharry {T, 22k}

When young Lord Harry was chosen by King Louis of Bavaria to become his husband and prince consort, Harry thought all of his dreams had come through. His illusions came crashing down when he understood it meant living in isolation in the alpine castle of Neuschwanstein with a husband who turned out to be far from what he had hoped for.

His illusions vanished, Harry will have learn to appreciate what has and even, perhaps, fall in love with his imperfect husband and his castle.

✨ some evening in springtime by delsicle / @eeveedel {M, 20k}

Fresh out of veterinary school, Louis moves to a sleepy small town in Texas to take over the local animal clinic. But his new life is quickly interrupted by a middle aged rancher with a bad leg and a mysterious past, who really needs Louis's yoga skills.

✨ Blind Faith by @2tiedships2 {M, 18k}

“Harry?” Liam prompted.

“I’m blind,” Harry eventually said, trying his best to keep himself from crying.

Liam was silent for a few moments, before responding, “That’s not exactly news, H. You were blind when I met you a year and a half ago. Have you been in denial this whole time or something?”

“No, Liam,” Harry cut in. “This is different. I’m not legally blind like I used to say. It’s not just my night vision. The tunnel from my tunnel vision has closed. I’m fucking blind! I moved halfway around the world in the hope of finding my soulmate and it’s obviously not happening now. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Not even a soulmate is going to want to put up with a blind alpha."

✨ Our love is special because it's you and I (series) by sweetkisses {NR, 11k}

"So what are you studying?" Harry asks.

"Accounting." Louis says quietly.

"Sweet. I don't know much about accounting but I do know that it means you must be pretty damn smart." Harry says nodding his head.

"Thanks." Louis giggles out and Harry didn't know it was possible for him to be more beautiful. "What, um, what are you studying?"

"Law." Harry says and lays his legs out in front of him as he places his hands behind him and tilts his head towards the sun.

"You must be pretty smart if you're studying law." Louis mocks with a smirk. Harry didn't expect the next words to ever come out of his mouth but this boy just does things to him.

"Two smart people make a genius couple."

or the four times Harry sees the beautiful boy in the wheelchair

✨ Heart Eyes by @snowy38 {E, 10k}

He fidgeted nervously, long fingers pushed through his soft fringe, fingertips lingering on the thick curls that he felt formed there. He hoped his hair looked okay. He hoped he looked okay.

He hoped-

“Oi oi!” Niall’s loud, Irish voice cut into the small space along with the loud chatter of the party; the door assumingly opened. He swallowed.

“Fuck off!” A northern accent complained; the sound of bodies wrestling before it went quiet again; the clunk of the lock confirming to him that his suitor was now locked inside.

Harry knew the voice. He knew. And if he hadn’t known the voice, he would have known the smoky, sweet scent of the boy before him. Seventeen years old, friends since they were eight, and they’d never been pushed into the kissing cupboard together before.

✨ Deep Within The Mystery of Your Eyes (I Am Home At Last) by patdkitten / @babyarcanacasey {M, 10k}

It's a world where you discover your soulmate after skin contact and finding your world exploding in colour. Louis has been blind his entire life. He makes do quite well, thank you very much, and he's glad that he doesn't have to see colours fade in and out of his world. Harry trains disability dogs, and, during a chance meeting with Louis at a local market, he discovers that Louis' his soulmate. He comes up with a wild scheme - train his current dog to be the perfect dog for Louis - in order to keep Louis in his life, and maybe convince him they're soulmates.

✨ the pain never leaves, but neither do you. (series) by Anonymous {M, 10}

Harry has fibromyalgia and Niall is an idiot, leaving Louis to bump into Harry at 6am in a hospital corridor. It ends up as something much more wonderful than Harry ever could have expected, stood with a walker in his ratty PJs after a nasty flare-up, and he finally finds someone who can love him just the way he is.

✨ I Roll 'til I Change My Luck by larry_hiatus / @larry-hiatus {T, 8k}

Dating is hard enough when you're gay. When Louis reveals to his Tinder matches that he uses a wheelchair and has a service dog, things tend to get even more complicated. Too bad the guys on dating apps aren't as sweet and understanding as his best friend Harry...

✨ Struggle by @1diamondinthesun {NR, 3k}

Louis had accepted long ago that he would always be alone in the world. Yet he often wondered what defined us as people: the cards we’d been dealt, or how we played them to survive.

Or, Louis is living with a chronic illness and growing tired of going it alone.

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fallingrealms16 · 1 year ago

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Sterek Fic Recs PART 7 <333

I cannot believe I have read enough sterek fic to be able to make a part 7?!?! It's been over a year and between work and my social life all I do is read, read, read!

Well here it is, sterek fic recs part 7, LETS GO !!

(ps. this is a long post so buckle in)

This Might Be Irony by thepsychicclam

38K Words // Chapters: 1/1 // Hits: 190K // COMPLETED

//MATURE//

Stiles and Derek have been close friends since the Hale siblings moved in next door after their parents' death. But Derek's in the popular group, he's a star baseball player, and he dates popular Pep Squad captain Jennifer Blake. Stiles doesn't have any of that, just his skateboard and a hopeless crush on Derek (oh yeah, and his Vote Lydia Martin Prom Queen button). As prom and the baseball state championship grow closer, Stiles and Derek start rekindling their friendship. And it all begins with two white boards.

But Then What... by Stoney

24K Words // Chapters: 3/3 // Hits: 182K // COMPLETED

//EXPLICIT//

Senior year is almost over, and all Stiles needs to do is keep his head down to survive. A teacher calls in a favor, leaving him stuck tutoring Derek Hale, one of the most popular jocks in school and a member of a group of douchecanoes who have bullied Stiles for years. He's someone Stiles totally hates. Totally. Like, doesn't like him even a little bit. DEFINITELY isn't attracted to him. Except that is a total lie. Fuck his life, seriously.

When You're Close I Feel the Sparks by Leslie_Knope

39K Words // Chapters: 4/4 // Hits: 156K // COMPLETED

//MATURE//

The guy is hot as hell, sure—leather jacket and glasses, Jesus, be still Stiles' poor, bisexual, beating heart—but more importantly, it must really suck being new on the first day of senior year. “We’re adopting him,” he decides, tugging Scott and Kira by the elbow in that direction. “Let’s go.”

What To Expect When You're Expecting (A Litter of Sourwolf Puppies) by Brego_Mellon_Nin

17K Words // Chapters: 1/1 // Hits: 176K // COMPLETED

//EXPLICIT//

The Sheriff sighs and plops down in a chair opposite his son. “Stiles, I’m going crazy here. We need to get you to a doctor. You sleep like you’re trying to get into the Guinness Book of World Records, and your eating habits are bizarre! You vomit around the clock and for some reason only the tea your mother used when she was pregnant will get your stomach to settle down for any length of time. Is there something you aren’t telling me? Can werewolves get guys pregnant? I’ve noticed how you look at that Hale kid-” Stiles meeps and flails, sloshing tea down his front. Luckily it’s not scalding anymore, but still hot, so he jumps up and wrenches his shirt off. “God, dad, no! Guys can’t get pregnant, that’s ridiculous, it’s like...” “Like werewolves being real?” his dad questions, deadpan.

More Than Biology by DiscontentedWinter

45K Words // Chapters: 13/13 // Hits: 60K // COMPLETED

//EXPLICIT//

Stiles is a teenaged, unmated omega whose sixteenth birthday is fast approaching. Derek is the beta who loves him, and promises to claim him. And then it all goes to hell.

SPECIAL FIC RECS:

The Soul Knows What the Heart Wants by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)

163K Words // Chapters: 9/9 // Hits: 74K // COMPLETED

//MATURE//

“Holy—shit,” Stiles breathed, Bacon stopping in what he was doing, still staring at him intently, as if begging him to understand, for someone to finally understand. Stiles felt like he’d been electrocuted and he leapt out of his chair, kneeling in front of Bacon and grabbing at his furry face. “Holy shit! Oh my God, are you—wait, holy—you’re not fucking with me, right?!” Bacon let out two quick barks, which Stiles chose to interpret as ‘no.’ “Oh my God, are you a real person in there?!” Stiles shouted in the wolf’s face, staring him right in the eye. He was still holding the wolf’s head with both hands, but Bacon dipped his muzzle in confirmation and Stiles officially lost his mind. “Oh my God!” he shouted again, releasing Bacon to clutch at his own hair. “Oh my God! Dude, for real?! You’re—holy shit! Holy shit!” He didn’t know how to react to this news. He had no fucking idea how to react. This was a person?! But how?! How was this a person?! People didn’t just turn into wolves!

Whisper Through the Din by HyperLittleNori (Shiguresan)

38K Words // Chapters: 4/4 // Hits: 11K // COMPLETED

//EXPLICIT//

He wasn’t good at knowing the best thing to say, knowing how to comfort someone. He never had been. That had always been his mom or Laura. He thought of them then, of his mom’s warm eyes and Laura’s thoughtful expression. He remembered that night she’d tucked him into the Camaro, smoke still clinging to their hair and clothes, remembered what she’d said and he thought those words would stick with him until the day he died. He watched Stiles for a long heartbeat; his own head slightly cocked as he listened to Stiles’s heart simmer back from the enraged crescendo it’d worked itself into. When it settled back to something sad and steady, like the vibration on a string instrument, Derek offered an uncertain echo of Laura’s words. “We’ll work this out, Stiles.”

This isn’t the OK!Cupid I thought I was signing up for by changez

21K Words // Chapters: 12/12 // Hits: 8K // COMPLETED

//MATURE//

Stiles and Scott are enjoying their relatively quiet life on the East Coast, but everything is turned upside down by the appearance of a very familiar black wolf stalking the nearby woods. A lone hunter forces Derek to make a last second decision to give Stiles the bite to save his life, but the circumstances bring a seemingly fairytale legend to reality. Derek feels remorse for what he’s done to Stiles, but before he can make amends, he’s captured. Stiles will have to come to terms with more than just the bite before it’s too late.

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norefs · 1 year ago

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Gen (non-romantic) fics recs: DC, Dysfunctional Batfamily

Fandom: DC, batfam. Theme: Dysfunctional Batfam This trope is kinda close to the Bad Bruce one but it's not quite the same; a Bad Bruce often is a manipulative bastard in control of everything, or just uncaring, while to qualify for this trope Bruce (or another family member) has to genuinely try and still be objectively terrible - and not just comically bad at communicating either; it usually references the several canon instances where Bruce knowingly inflicted severe physical injury to Jason, or beat his kids (or the various assassination attempts between siblings); usually also involves complex siblings dynamics. And they fucked up, and they still love each other so much but they don't really know how not to hurt each other and they're trying so very very hard and they're learning.

(… maybe don't read all of them in a row though, I don't think that could be good for anyone)

to the red planet Mars, by r_astra (https://archiveofourown.org/works/27613958) 6/6 Chapters, 36,912 words Not Rated, Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Main Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, the rest of the batfam

Official summary: Tim doesn’t notice the Batmobile roaring into the cave until the tires squeal as it skids to a halt. He starts, splashing long-cooled coffee across his lap as he lurches upright. Bruce is practically throwing himself out of the driver’s seat. He stalks around to the back of the car and Tim stares, confused. The trunk? He calls out. “Mask?” Bruce grunts a negative. Tim circles the car in time to see Bruce haul something—someone out. They’re big, but not quite as tall as Bruce, clad in black Kevlar and brown leather, wrists cuffed. Tim stops in his tracks when he recognizes the man. It’s Jason Todd.

Why I love it: This is about Bruce and Jason's relationship. This is someone going hey. Look at those canon events. If you stop and think about it, that's fucked up. And I love fics that look close like that at canon. And the characters in there are Not Okay - it's a story about abuse - but it's never hopeless. Because they're trying so hard to make it right and they've fucked up a whole lot, but they (the whole family) love each other and they're trying.

Excerpt: “We’re going to the cave.” Hood jerks his head up. “Hell, no.” Bruce starts walking towards the Batmobile. “No,” Hood repeats. “No way. I’m not allowed in Gotham, remember?” “Hn.” Bruce keeps walking, the pressure in his head building and then easing as Hood must start following. Hood doesn’t respond, but Bruce can hear him swearing under his breath in one long, continuous stream. When they reach the Batmobile, Bruce pulls out a pair of cuffs. “Seriously?” Hood sighs. He holds his wrists out anyway. Bruce slaps the cuffs on and checks to make sure they adjusted themselves correctly, then grabs Hood by the elbow and starts dragging him towards the back of the vehicle. Hood must be processing slowly, because he doesn’t start fighting until they get within a yard of the trunk. Bruce wins.

An Aquarium of Nameless Things, by husborth (https://archiveofourown.org/works/18308171) 4/4 chapters, 14.120 words (has a very good second work in the series at 45k more, with a wider batfam sample; the second work is technically unfinished but stops at a satisfying place) T, No Archive Warnings Apply

Main Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson

Official summary: After a difficult case, Jason learns a few things about Bruce, and deals with them about as well as Jason deals with anything.

Why I love it: I like this interpretation of Jason and the Pit, with Jason trying really hard to keep a lid on it but also being emotionally 15 (I know nothing about emotional development I just once read the phrase "emotions too big for his body" and liked it), and swinging between actually dangerous/hurtful and siblingly petty. And them all being in over their heads and Bruce not healed yet (never healing) from Jason's death and a Dick, over-protective of Bruce, who never really knew Jason before, and the crushing weight of responsibility. They just feel so strongly.

Excerpts: “You’re an annoying prick who didn’t even eat all of my ravioli, which you stole,” Jason said into the phone. “[…] Also my carpet smells like mildew, so if you want to come shampoo my carpet in apology for your whole everything, that’d be great.” - “No,” Dick admitted. “But it’s my turn. Bruce almost died of an oxycontin overdose in front of me. Did you know that?” Jason’s face turned red and hot and got tight—liar, liar, liar, pants on fire, the fire licking at his legs in just the millennium he lay there dying, sucking air through bloody lungs. A lie. A sham. He’d been tricked, Bruce had tricked him, Bruce had made him think he cared but this was a lie, these were all lies. He would die, he would pass in a storm before him, and Jason would be left to root through the garbage, he’d be—the dogs were barking loud and they tore his heels bloody. “No,” Jason choked out. “I didn’t.”

never be the first to believe, by ohnomydear (https://archiveofourown.org/works/17967926) 15/15 chapters, 98.132 words T, No Archive Warnings Apply

Main Characters: Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Ric Grayson

Official Summary: If Bruce 'made up' with Jason at the diner following the events at Sanctuary, the Red Hood shouldn't be reluctant to ask Bruce for permission to be in Gotham for a necessary surgery. Instead, Jason kidnaps Tim and asks him to make sure Bruce doesn't know he's in Gotham. Yeah, nothing about this sounds like they've forgiven each other.

Why I love it: That one is ostensibly about Jason and Bruce, and the aftermath of the big fight where Bruce beats Jason all to hell. But it's also (more so, imo) about each of the siblings' relationships with Jason, and with Bruce. Yay for Robins banding together against Bruce. People talking past each other, contradicting POVs, and what forgiveness means/looks like. Also this one has an amnesiac Ric, which creates fun character dynamics.

Excerpt: “How did you get me this far?” And whose car was this? “The truth, or would you like a face-saving lie that we can both pretend to believe?” Tim groaned and reached for the coffee. “Which board room did I fall asleep in?” “Your office. For once. But intern Jared noticed and called the car company, which showed up in record time.” Jason gestured with one hand at the car around them. “And then they ‘took you home.’” “Why not just wake me up?” Tim hissed. “And don’t even get me started on how I don’t have an intern Jared and I’m really suspicious that he and the car company driver look astonishingly similar.” “Guilty. And as Bruce has always said, if Tim falls asleep on patrol, it’s because he made poor decisions about how much sleep he needed.” Tim gaped at him. “He—he doesn’t say that.” “No, he doesn’t.” Jason grinned. “But let’s say that I say it. Now, to business. Sorry I didn’t get the copies of the agenda printed first, but I was busy finding a wheelchair to get you out of the building.” Tim dropped his head into his left hand, groaning. “You realize I do have to go back there, right? And explain what that all was?” “That doesn’t sound like intern Jared’s or Driver Ulysses’ problem. Both of them are more concerned with finding their respective missing twin brothers – and solving the terrible murder of their mother, which took place ten sad, sad years ago.” Great. He’d made up backstories for covers with a four second half-life. Tim took a sip of the coffee and found it passable. “The agenda?” “You know I’m not allowed in Gotham.” Jason’s voice had gone flat, as if the humor had just dropped out of it.

How Far Love Goes, by BeatriceEagle (@flybynightwing) (https://archiveofourown.org/works/31871722) 11/11 chapters, 99.549 words T, Graphic Depictions of Violence

Main Characters: the whole batfam

Official summary: Plenty of family reunions end in fighting. Not that many end in explosions. A mass Arkham breakout brings all of Bruce's children home, and with them, all the drama, secrets, and anger they've been keeping for years. Amidst rising tensions and a mysterious new threat in Gotham, the family has to work together to round up the rogues—and confront their feelings about each other.

Why I love it: A main plot peppered by tasty flashbacks (that inform our understanding of the present) of batfam interactions through twelve years, ranging from cute to heartrending. Complex relationships web that actually includes the girls too (Babs and Steph and Cass!).

Excerpts: “How about Nightwing?” said a voice from above, and then Nightwing somersaulted from the branches of a nearby tree, landing lightly on the ground beside Cass. Batman pivoted half a degree to face him. “Oracle called you too?” “Of course she did, B, there was an Arkham breakout.” “It’s handled.” Nightwing crossed his arms. “Handled like it was last time?” Batman mirrored Nightwing’s stance. “It’s handled.” “Excuse me, but I don’t feel like standing by and watching you get your back broken ag—” “Go back to Blüdhaven. They need you there.” Batman spun around and stalked away. Nightwing stared after him, his body leaning in the direction Batman had gone, like he was about to run after him. Then he slumped backward. “Unbelievable. Just unbelievable.” He turned to Cass. As always, his body language screamed awkwardness when he spoke to her. Even facing her, he angled his shoulders away, like he didn’t want to be in this conversation. “Is he letting you help him?” Cass shrugged one shoulder, deciding that was better than trying to put the mess of hers, Barbara’s, and Batman’s stand-off into words - [flashback from Dick's Robin days] Then, for the first time since they'd begun their stakeout, movement beside him. Dick looked over. Batman's hand stretched out towards him. In his gauntleted palm, a single yellow M&M. Dick looked up. Batman's face was unchanged. But the M&M was obviously for Dick, right? He picked it up gingerly, as if it were explosive. (And given that it had come from within Batman's cape, who was to say it wasn't?) Eyes still on Batman, Dick put the candy in his mouth. Just chocolate. No explosions. Batman's hand withdrew back into his cape. A moment later it emerged with another M&M. Green this time. Dick took it and grinned.

#genuaryficrecs #genuary fic rec fest #batman #batfam #dc #fic recs #r_astra #husborth #ohnomydear #beatriceeagle #flybynightwing #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #wow reccing 300k words that I read several months ago does take some time actually

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