#which is like. fine. doesn't mean I'm stupid or that I'm not actually reading what is supposed to be there

[followerofmercy]

I get insecure about the strangest things. I've been sitting around mildly anxious that I'm bad at media analysis because I don't read enough/watch enough/expose myself to enough new stories and I especially don't get into enough Adult Media

Because I really don't. I watch maybe one show, one movie and play one new game a year, and read between 0 and 10 books/short stories

and then my roommate floored me by saying "No yeah Arcane is a difficult show to understand. It is Really Adult. So was Gideon. It's a really difficult book for most people to get, even the first one" and now I feel a little silly asldfj. Yay good grade in story analysis and being able to engage with a story without just Projecting on it

[misscrawfords]

The following plot is so tedious to me:

- heroine is supposedly bad and clumsy at stuff, an underdog, doesn't believe in herself

- there's a guy who is very, very hot but in a dangerous way and he's real mean, guys, real mean and she really hates him and there's good reason because he is so mean, just so mean

- he clearly hates her too for being the enemy or for being weak or being clumsy or whatever

- except that he keeps failing to kill her when he has the chance and his insults sound weirdly like ~advice on how to survive the difficult situation they're both in and sometimes he smirks at her and it's weirdly ~hot except that's IMPOSSIBLE and she is so definitely not attracted to him because that would be STUPID when he is so MEAN and he wants to KILL her

- until one day it turns out to her COMPLETE AND UTTER SURPRISE that isn't trying to kill her at all, he's actually PROTECTING her and he's been so HARD and MEAN to make her tougher because he has seen her POTENTIAL

- and then they kiss

The thing is. I could absolutely love this plot and I do when it's done right. Because enemies to lovers can be excellent and people concealing their motivations and not being what they seem is also excellent. But the problem is how poorly it's executed. There are several issues:

- this plot and characterisation is now so standard that as soon as a male character is described as antagonistic and yet conventionally attractive, I expect him to be madly in love with the heroine for no reason and I'm instantly reading a double motivation into everything he says or does. This is a problem in the hands of an unskilled writer because it means his antagonism poses absolutely no threat. Of course he's not going to kill the heroine! He's growling in a threateningly constipated way because he's trying to conceal his boner! The apparently subtle, hidden motivation is neither subtle nor hidden to the reader.

- Well, okay, fine, you might say. Why should it be subtle or hidden? It's okay to know genre expectations in advance! We all know Poirot will find the killer! Yes, but we don't know who the killer is, right? There needs to be some kind of mystery! If I can see the massive plot twist coming from the first paragraph in which the character is introduced then it's a really shitty plot twist!

- Furthermore, it makes the heroine look UNBELIEVABLY STUPID. This is particularly a problem in stories which are setting the heroine up to be SUPER SMART. If they are this clever, getting by on their wits, self-aware, why are they SO FUCKING OBLIVIOUS to the fact that the hot guy who they're obsessed with is really into them? "Why isn't he trying to kill me?" she muses thoughtfully to the reader. "I wonder what Machiavellian game he's playing?" she debates with herself endlessly. HE WANTS TO FUCK YOU, ROSEBUD, it's not that deep. If this were a genuine mystery, the reader could analyse it alongside the heroine, and feel shock at the revelation too but instead she comes across as an absolute moron and none of her internal debates are remotely interesting.

- ah, I hear you say, but haven't you forgotten the concept of dramatic irony? Knowing that Hector will die doesn't lessen the impact of hearing him debate whether to go out and fight Achilles and in fact increases pathos and tragedy. So surely knowing where a plot is going doesn't lessen its impact? Well, first of all you're not Homer writing the Iliad, Shirley, so jot that down. I just think you have to have some concept of writers craft to pull of dramatic irony successfully. If the narrative was ironic or even mocking towards the supposedly smart heroine's blindspots that would be one thing. If there were actual consequences to her for being a dumbass that would be another. But the narrative doesn't do that. It asks us with complete seriousness to believe Hot Mean Dude is a massive threat to heroine and that heroine is a very super intelligent super smart person. The narration of these books is SO flat. And first person present tense? Good grief, it's the WORST.

Beyond all this, I realise yet again how different my taste in men is to, apparently, most women. Massive dudes with muscles, tattoos and weird eyes who insult me continuously just aren't of any interest to me at all. I'm bored just reading a description of their appearance clearly designed to arouse female readers. Physically, emotionally, anything. I'd be off pining over a scrawny bookworm with asthma who's a minor character there to make witty quips under his breath, show me no interest whatsoever, and die pathetically in the final battle of book 2 out of 3.

And relatedly, I'd love to read about a heroine who is clever and competent and interesting. Like, genuinely. But the problem is their stories being told in first person, present tense. It's the most intimate of narrative styles which means if the narrative is dull, wooden, lacks flair or style or interest and yet is apparently the inner narration of the Smartest Person Ever, it's quite hard to suspend my disbelief.

Writers need to study the art of narratology a bit more and how being an unreliable narrator should extend beyond not picking up on the fact that you have the hots for your hot enemy who also has the hots for you.

[omgfangirlland]

Dude.. I imagine a neglected reader who's into wattpad, qoutev, ao3 or any app.. Then one day she stumble upon a Bruce Wayne x joker or any weird ship of her family. Imagine the batfam just seeing her laugh at the corner while looking at her phone, thinking that she's got a boyfriend something but the truth is she's actually reading those weird fanfics. Just imagine the look of Batman when he sees the Batman x joker x Bruce Wayne or just Batman x joker.. Plus the tiktok edits.. Lmao (plot twist, it was reader who actually wrote those fanfics under a fake user and it became famous)

-🔱

OMG IMAGINE

Finding ships like Batman x Joker, Nightwing x Slade, SUPERMAN X ROBIN?!

THE INCEST ONES-

They may think reader is laughing and smiling because of a boy- but she's about to become worse than the rogues by simply spreading lies and fiction.

(Reader is quite mean, kinda a brat. This is also honestly more crack than serious.)

She doesn't hide the fact that she hates them, all her profiles say "I'm doing this because I hate them". All of them. She doesn't believe they'd care or that they'll find out, they didn't with the ones that already exist, so-

She doesn't do it half assed- she gets better and better, more and more poetic, the biggest masterpieces always being the Joker x Batman fics, but the tiktok edits are all of Nightwing getting choked by Slade(she enjoys those the best) and are just as popular.

Dick is on the verge of crying if he gets one more "Slade's lover" catcall, he almost hit a light pole the first time it happened. Bruce is just tired, but it's nothing new, the batman x joker happens at least once a year.

But Jason? Jason's eyes are on you. He doesn't like you smiling and giggling, kiking your feet like an anime school girl- he thinks you're talking to someone. Not a boy- but some weirdo on the internet. He's even more stressed because he has no proof, and you're not on the best terms for him to just ask-

He goes to Tim. And while Tim finds it weird, he does it. Timothy finds it even weirder how much security you have on your laptop and phone, and he shrugs. "It isn't worth it. Just to see what? The stupid shows she watches?"

But Jason falls even deeper into the pure paranoia- You're talking to an old man who does cybersecurity- that must be it.

Dick found the tiktok account. He screamed with Bruce right across him. He's not fine, mainly because the clips aren't public, they're from videos locked deep into the Batcomputer and Teen Titans systems. Your accounts have officially become a problem.

You notice, and sadly, you say goodbye to the crazies who read and watched with a simple "The bats found me😢" and nothing else. Accounts deactivated, deleted, and the only glimpse of them existing is people on Twitter crying about you getting got by the vigilantes.

You still read them, just to laugh, and Jason's still worried. Too worried. So worried, he started talking to you. You hated it.

"... You know- you could talk to me. Maybe we could go get some batburgers on my bike-"

"I'd rather get waterboarded and hung by my ribs."

"Alright."

He decides to bring it to Bruce's attention, which result in the man sitting on the edge of your bed as you huddle in the corner, as far away from him as possible, looking like a kit ready to hiss her little lungs away.

Now- you could tell the truth, just say you were actually jokergagglingbatsballs35, but what fun was that? You took the opportunity to stab. Psychologically.

"I'm not. I'm talking to friends I know in real life- you know? I have those." You roll your eyes as you spew a half lie, half truth. "And since when do you care about me and whoever I'm talking to? Stop acting like you're a caring father and go back to being Batman. You're weirding me out with your two-bit act."

It's super effective!

And now, the family has forgotten about the edits and fanfics- they have a bigger problem. You taking their worry and affection as threats and fakeness.

----

I definitely see this batsis starting to manipulate them once she realizes they're not faking, and when she gets bored, she'll literally take some money and just move away.

[pomefioredove]

hello hello! i see that the headcanon requests are open, so i have arrived 🐺🐺 i'd like to request the housewardens + chenya, neige and ortho with a reader that's mute! i feel like this would be an interesting thing to go off of. feel free to write it as something reader gained after a certain event, or as an illness that they were born with. platonic would be great, but i think romantic would be absolutely adorable too (minus ortho obviously) so go wild, do whatever you want >:) if this is fine for you to write of course!! love your writing, youre my favourite blog on tumblr hehe (runs away)

thank you so much!! and ofc ofc. I'm writing this based off my own experiences with being semiverbal so if I get something wrong,,, that's on me 😔

summary: nonspeaking reader type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, che'nya, leona, azul, kalim, vil, neige, idia, ortho (platonic), malleus additional info: romantic or platonic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu

I think Riddle is more adaptive than others give him credit for

it's not like there's any rule about not speaking

(and if there was, he would make an exception for you. he's not completely unreasonable)

I can see him learning sign language with you

and if that's not your thing, he'll figure something else out

he's a fast learner, after all

and he wants to make you comfortable, too. not that he'd ever outright admit it...

(obvious favoritism)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Che'nya is always quick on his feet

or... on air?

anyway

that means that he isn't one to let the absence of conversation stop him from his usual mischief

and he does love charades...

it's almost like he can read your thoughts. or your... hands? expressions?

whenever someone is giving you a hard time, they miiight just end up talking back to a floating head

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Leona actually never really... brings it up

before he had the full story, he just figured you were shy around him

(which went straight to his head, of course)

so he was already used to it when he found out it's not something you can control

and... he treats you no different for it

he knows you're not stupid or rude just because you're not yapping all the time

and if anyone else gave you a hard time about it... they'd be answering to him

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

no worries with Azul

I mean, the guy can really do it all

sign language, pen and paper, text-to-speech, body language...

he's rather adaptable, and, trust me, being unable or unwilling to speak won't stop him

the offer to give you the voice of a beautiful singer is still on the table... but he can't blame you for not taking the deal

of course

in the meantime, you can come to him for anything and he'll help you out

on the house <3

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Kalim's heart is in the right place

is he disappointed you won't be able to talk and sing and cheer with him? a little

you're used to the disappointment, unfortunately

but he doesn't give up so easily

or... at all

no singing? he's handing you an instrument

no talking? no problem, he knows you're still listening!

no hummin, shouting, cheering? he can make enough noise for the both of you

he makes sure you're included in everything

very sweet

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Vil has high expectations, but he isn't unreasonable

if you can't talk, you can't talk, and that's final

that doesn't excuse you from everything else in his strict regimen, though

what may be a weakness to others is a strength to him

you can improve yourself tenfold by focusing on what you can do rather than what you can't

writing, dancing, music...

however you choose to express yourself, he's very supportive

much like Kalim, he includes you in every conversation, every decision, every yes/no question

he's pretty great

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Neige! Neige is a sweetie

I like to think of Neige as someone who's actually quite timid in person, despite his career

it's probably your quietness that draws him to you in the first place

he is so very supportive

he's the kind of introvert to suddenly become extroverted when someone needs help

"excuse me, they asked for no pickles" type of guy

he'll hold your hand through everything if you need it, and remain by your side if you don't

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ortho and Idia are probably the best people to have on your side

Idia just feels so much more... comfortable around you, since he struggles with speaking, himself

he'll let you use his tablet if you need it to speak

...and then he'll get you one of your own, so he doesn't have a heart attack when you accidentally switch tabs

he'll even program a custom voice or two for you

Ortho is a walking translator for you

with a database full of information on body language and expression, he can determine your emotional state in a single glance

he's happy to help in any way he can, of course!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

at some point, Malleus needs a shirt that says "#1 Prefect Defender"

you haven't said a single word to him but if anything happened to you he would curse everyone in this room and then himself

(he means well, I promise)

he's never minded, nor questioned your silence

certain fae communicate through lights or movement rather than sound, so it isn't even anything strange to him

you fit right in at Diasomnia

and you're welcome to stay here for as long as you please

(hint hint)

[orionhelluvaranting]

Debunking the Myth about Stolass' Lack of Awareness

Justifying Stolass' harassment by his ✨unawareness✨ is such a popular tactic of the stans. "He didn't know his behavior makes Blitzø uncomfortable!" they say. "He was sheltered all of his life!" they say. Some of them are bold enough to headcanon Stolass as autistic even.

However, what if I say there's the scene - the one single scene - that wrecks all those statements about Stolass' unawareness? And just the one shot expresses the whole essence of my point. Do you want to see it? Okay, here it is:

If you didn't comprehend it (maybe you forgot this moment from the series) that's fine. I was going to analyse this anyway 🔎

Here's the context: S2E4, "Western Energy". Stolass, Stella and Andre-blah-blah are sitting at the cafe for privileged jerks and discussing S&S' divorce. Then Striker breaks into the building and fires a series of shots at the prince (all missed the target). Right in the middle of the shooting Stolass turns to Stella, looks at her evil smirk... and he gets it all! Immediately! This is literally what's happening. Stolass understood that his wife has put a hit on him. And how did he come up with that conclusion?

He! Just! Read! Facial! Expression!

The line that's addressed from Stolass to Striker confirms this unambiguously:

So what is the unawereness we could talk about after all this? No, really! Stolass not only identified Stella's emotion (schadenfreude) correctly but also connected it to the current situation and his wife's general attitude towards him from which he deduced the reason for Stella's emotion (she craves his death, therefore she's the one who put a hit on him). And all this in a matter of seconds. To the whistle of angelic bullets!!! Like usually people become less analytical in moments of danger. But here's Stolass suddenly showing us miracles of emotional intelligence! Bravo!

So why can't he apply the same tactic to Blitzø or Octavia? Why is he able to grasp emotions of his abuser - who he hates and despises - very easily; but he stays unaware for so long when it comes to his loved ones? Why it took him almost a whole day to see that Via doesn't enjoy being in Loo Loo Land (although she openly said this from the very beginning)? Why it took him nearly a year (!!!) to see that Blitzø doesn't enjoy being his "impish plaything" (although he made it clear constantly)?

Isn't he able to understand them? Or maybe just doesn't want to?

Draw conclusions by yourself. And those of you who wants a few more thoughts of mine - I'm gladly inviting you under the cut!

You know what's the funniest part? This little detail doesn't have any impact on the story! At all!!! You literally could cut it off, change the dialog between Stolass and Striker a bit and TA-DA! Nothing would've changed. Because Stolass doesn't remember that his wife tried to kill him. He doesn't take any precautions even! Like, apparently, Via spends almost the entire second season with her mother.... and Stolass' totally OKAY with this?! Huh?!?

Why was that moment pushed into the series regardless? Well, I think Viv just wanted to praise her babyboy.* Like, "Oh, look how smart and cool he is, not like that stupid cow, Stella!" But ironically this decision has exactly the opposite effect.

I mean, it's a normal thing not being able to understand something in a few seconds in an emergency. Just a normal thing. Honestly, see no reason for judging. But if you, Stolass, have actually realised your abusive wife's desire for unaliving you and then you don't do shit preferring to chase your butty call while your precious daughter lives with that abusive wife of yours... Then I have a question:

Besides, as I just said, this all levels the whole "Stolass' unawareness" excuse to the ground. And you can't fix this by making excuses below your own video, Vivienne 🙄

If you want your audience to grasp something, then you should follow the "Show, Don't Tell" rule. Also it wouldn't hurt you to try and not contradict yourself. This time you had every chance to do so but you've just missed it... Congrats?

So what was the point?!

*By the way something similar was showed at "Oops" when Stolass stayed with Ozz (for some unclear reason) and explained to him - the Deadly Sin - how deals with the Deadly Sins are working! Yeah, what a nice fellow Stolass is, saved helpless dumb Ozzie from losing everything! Isn't that adorable everytime Stolass needs to look smart somebody must lose all of their braincells? Looks like somebody doesn't beat the Gary Stu allegations, huh?

[howi99]

The Nest chapter 5

13 yo Adam: *waking up, not feeling the burning sensation on his face anymore* What the-

???: Oh, you're awa-

Adam: *picking up the first thing he could find, brandishing it as a weapon towards the voice*

11 year old Jaune: *looking unimpressed by said "weapon"* You know, i think it's the first time someone tried to threaten me with a porn book.

Adam: *looking at his hands, seeing the cover of Ninja of love* AH! *Drop the book in pure disgust*

Jaune: *picking it up, posing it back on the nightstand* It's actually quite the good read-

Adam: *trying his best to get as far away of Jaune, which was complicated since the bed was against the wall* WHO!? WHERE?!

Jaune: *perplexed* ... Dude, you are like twice as muscled as me. Heck, i'm probably more in danger than you are-

Adam: *snarl, looking ready to fight*

Jaune: *putting his hands in the air with a timid smile* See? No weapon! Just, calm down and-

Adam: *tries attacking Jaune, who grabs his arm and use the momentum to throw the other kid on the ground* Argh!?!

Jaune: *sigh, twisting the arm of the angry teenager behind its back*

Adam: *trying to move around but being unable to do so as Jaune used aura to strengthen himself* L-let me go!

Jaune: *deadpan* You just tried attacking me! Fuck no i wont!

Adam: *angrily* You humans are all the same! Taking pleasure in hurting us! *Trying to move even more so and again, failing* GET OFF ME!

Jaune: *annoyed* Hey, i just fucking saved your eye you stupid bull! The least you could say is thank you!

Adam: LET ME- *realising what Jaune just said* ... Uh? *Blinking, then closing each eye one at a time* What-

Jaune: *feeling the bull faunus weaken his attempt to escape* Shit man, took you long enough.

Adam: *looking around, seeing the inside of a tent* ... This isn't the mine?

Jaune: *sigh, releasing him, dusting himself* Tell me, what would i be doing in a fucking mine? Do i look like a god damn employee to you?!

Adam: *quickly getting up, still wary of the other kid* ... No?

Jaune: *sigh again, pointing the bed* Sit down, there's a shit tone you need to know.

_ _ _

Adam: *touching the almost invisible scar on his eye, looking himself in a mirror* That's... Woah..

12 years old Vernal: *grinning* Not bad, eh? Jaune's semblance is the shit, man! Can heal almost anything as long as it's recent enough!

Adam: *looking back at the teen talking to the weird lady* So you guys-

Vernal: *cutting him with a smile, looking proud* Are badass? Awesome? Exactly like Robin Hood?

Adam: *deadpan* I was going to say "you guys are the bandits i've heard of?"

Vernal: ... Really? We save you and that's all we get?! *Annoyed* Fucking transported you on my back for not even a thank you!?!

Adam: *nervous* I-i mean-

Raven: *walking towards them* So, kid, how do you feel?

Adam: *a bit (lot) intimidated by the woman dressed in war gear* I-i uh-huh-

Raven: *confused* What's wrong with you? You got a concussion or what?... *Looking at Jaune, worried* He didn't have a head injury, right?

Jaune: *shaking his head* Nope, just a dumbass who can't think before acting.

Adam: *glaring at Jaune* You- *sees the big grin on Jaune's face, seeing his lack of seriousness* ... *Sigh* Yeah, i'm fine.

Raven: *nod* Good. You were too hurt to be sent with the first batch, but the white fang should be back in about 3 months to take the others.

Adam: *confused* ... What?

Raven: *looking back at Jaune again* You didn't explain him?

Jaune: Yeah, but i think he was too focused on playing with his scar instead of listening... *Shrug* Which i mean, i'd probably do the same, not gonna lie.

Adam: What's going on?

Raven: *sigh* In short, we raid mines in exchange for food from the white fang. They'll also bring you to menagerie, since you're still a kid.

Adam: ... *Shaking his head* Man, can't believe i was saved by a bunch of humans. Criminals no less.

Jaune: Hey, it's not like we are a bunch of killers. *Smirk* Human, faunus, it doesn't matter much when the law wants you dead, right?

Adam: I... Guess not? Huh... Never thought about it that way before.

Raven: Ah! Can't blame you! *Smirk* It's hard to think about others when you're suffering.

Adam: *looking at both Jaune and Raven's smirk* ... You both have that same punchable face.

Vernal: *nod* You think so too, huh?

[abyssalpeach]

in the case of the people vs. bell's hells...

and also the campaign 3 finale overall. disclaimer: this is gonna get long bc of my propensity to yap so i'm gonna simultaneously try to keep it short but also put it under a "read more." spoilers will be referenced throughout.

i wouldn't call these rent-lowering gunshots, but i desperately need some of the folks in this fandom to get a grip. so instead i'm asking: walk with me. hold my hand. i am looking you in the eyes and want this fandom to be a nice place. please forgive me for any attitude but i am tired of being talked down to.

"they never faced any consequences" consequences are the result bad dice rolls. of which they had plenty. if you think their narrative choices should have resulted in more punishment, say that. but i think you missed the part where they have targets on their back from several factions and now-mortal deities and you need to kill the cop in your head.

"it was too confusing and the pacing was bad" i don't even disagree with this takeaway. i will say this was actually the easiest campaign for me to follow. m9 is so fun, but was very narratively scattered at times. however, i think this is just the nature of ttrpg/actual play. it's not scripted. it's messy and sometimes you'll zone out about it. sometimes what the players want isn't what grabs you personally. it doesn't mean they're wrong or bad to play it that way.

"i fell off c3 and everything i've heard about the finale is stupid" fall off, then. totally fine, i'm not here to stop you, sincerely. and not to hurl cliches, but with tabletop it really is more about the journey than the destination. without context, you are missing too many pieces to pass judgement. that's all i'm gonna say on that.

"the other PCs were just so much better" i gotta say this one seems like a skill issue lol. there's not a single party i haven't loved with my whole heart, but they satisfy different purposes or dynamics! vm was destined for greatness. m9 was destined to pull important strings. bh was destined to shake up the order of things. they were supposed to be controversial in-world. they're salt of the earth, rising far beyond their stations ever expected. they became important at work and it very nearly ruined their lives.

"it was like sitting in a philosophy 101 class" praytell what philosophy classes that you've sat in discussed the ethics of magic, direct divine involvement in human* lives, and potential outcomes that would come along with killing all the gods or releasing something called the god-eater. look. i grew weary with the rehashing of these conversations too, really i did. that said, i think it needed to play out this way in order for the finale to go the way it did.

allow me to explain. one of the defining qualities of bell's hells was how different they all were. whether it's their perspectives, life experiences, backgrounds, desires, aspirations... you get it. this was the point. they were bound together by compassion and love for each other. and this extended to those they stood for personally, and those their friends cared about. it was how they approached ruidus, the gods, the people of vasselheim. and they walked the walk and trusted the process, prepared to face anything. including death.

*obviously including all exandrian/ruidian races beyond just human

"the finale cheapened the ending of vox machina" it didn't. i'm sorry but it very fundamentally did not and if that's your takeaway from a change of circumstance ~30 years down the line, i am worried that you are too lost in the sauce due to favoritism. if your takeaway from vax being allowed to return to the material plane is that now his conclusion from 30 years ago was just him going on a work trip, that is a you problem.

the narrative doesn't treat it like that. the characters don't treat it like that. the cast doesn't treat it like that. let me repeat myself: if you think vax's c1 ending is now nothing more than a glorified work trip, that is a you problem.

life goes on. the state of the world is changing constantly, especially in a world with gods and magic and different planes of existence. matt allowed these players to have direct involvement in the ways it changes. if vax was allowed to return in some capacity as a result of those changes, the cast made that happen. it wasn't even on bell's hells priority list! this was a natural change of circumstance. if that's the kind of thing you find upsetting, maybe unpack that elsewhere.

i'm gonna wrap it up here but i hope you keep this in mind: if you don't like a thing anymore, you can absolutely drop it. you don't need anyone's permission. but what i ask is that if you want to engage in thoughtful conversation and criticism about it, you keep these things in mind.

i don't believe this show or cast to be above criticism. i have plenty of critiques of my own. but the campaign three finale was the opposite of bad. it was the most satisfying conclusion we could have possibly gotten. it was the culmination of the last 3 years with almost everyone who encountered bell's hells and honored the last 10 years of their hard work. i am so so proud of matt and the cast and i think you should be too.

[artsarasp]

Hello! I love your art! Do you recommend the Italian sv translation? It's so much prettier than the English one i keep just going into bookshops and stroking it 🤣 But i haven't been able to justify the expense since I've already got them all in English 😭

Ahhh!! I'd say no??? I'm sorry as much as I'm having fun noticing all the differences between the English edition and the Italian one the more I read the more it becomes clear I should have just gone with the English edition (it's fine in the end cause I bought it when I was out with my friends and I was just very high on spirits!)

They got rid of all the suffixes as well as the glossary about them and the pronunciation guides at the end of the book. Being that there are no suffixes except Shizun (which they don't explain what it means btw, it is mentioned in the general glossary in the suffixes section which is very funny since they got rid of them all) sometimes the text becomes much longer because they need to explain a lot more.

"This was the most senior of the original Shen Qingqiu’s disciples, Luo Binghe’s shixiong, Ming Fan." becomes "Ming Fan era il più anziano tra i suoi discepoli e fratello marziale di Luo Binghe, ma sopra di lui nella scala gerarichica." ( Ming Fan was the most senior of his disiples and Luo Binghe's martial brother, but of higher hierarchy) It's not that bad but it makes everything a little bit longer. Also, all the names of the places have been translated, which is great for understanding but some names are a bit of a mouthful in Italian. They also keep repeating the translated sword's names, first, they go the "Xiuya sword" and right after there's "La spada dell'eleganza spirituale" which would be fine if it wasn't for the fact that it seems to be doing it multiple times AND the fact that the translated names are already available at the end of the book in the character profiles. Idk, maybe it gets better later on but it's irking me a little bit.

There are some diffrences that are very funny if not that they change how a character comes across.

YQY in English saying "Shidi, Don't be angry" has become "Smettila di prendertela con quel ragazzo" (Stop picking on that boy) which was so weird for him to say that it had me opening the English edition to check what he was saying.

When SQQ describes Ming Fan in English it goes "Ming Fan’s appearance was respectable enough, it was just that his face was a bit unfortunate, with a sharp mouth and sunken cheeks." In Italian it goes "Se non fosse stato per le labbra sottili e il volto che ricordava il muso di una scimmia, avrebbe avuto un aspetto accettabile" (If it wasn't for his thin lips and his face which resembled a monkey's snout, he would have looked acceptable) WHICH IS SO MUCH MEANER BUT FUNNY- MING FAN MY POOR BOY.

But now I got to a bit that actually made me a bit annoyed. Like, it doesn't make sense in Italian.

When the system lists what SQQ can do to get B-Points, point two is "Avoid landmines that break suspension of disbelief." and in Italian it got translated to " Eliminare i trigger" (Delete the triggers) which doesn't make sense??? In Italian or English?? This is not how we use the word trigger. I've even asked some friends if maybe I was stupid and forgot my own language but no, it doesn't make sense, no one understood what point two was! This is bad.

I'm gonna keep reading because I can have fun spotting the differences but honestly, treasure your English edition.

[fairestbeard]

Why Fakrichie makes sense

I know when a lot of people in the bear fandom think about Neil Fak and Richie, they think comedically sexually charged banter but not actual flirting or possible romance.

One of the reasons is probably because Neil is accidentally a little bit annoying even though he is written to be a kind of comic relief character - a little bit cute, a little bit (or a lot) stupid and a little bit useful. Some people find his stereotypical-ness a little bit much and it doesn't help that he goes around complicating a certain matter.

The other reason, and I know a lot of people will hate to admit it, is the aesthetics of it. What it looks like. It's an unusual sight for a guy like Richie to be smitten with a guy like Neil Fak even in the queer world and especially in media and this is exactly why I eat it up.

1. Because woke

(Richie breaking the 4th wall for the first time while making his infamous announcement to the Ball Breaker nerds)

I love wokeness. I love woke shit. I love inclusion. I want to see all types of people and all forms of (adult and consenting) relationships on my screen. With Fakrichie, as with Sydcarmy, I know that the unspoken sentiments and unacknowledged theatrics of desirability politics is always obviously in play in different forms. And just so you know, everything is political. Everything you see in media plays a political role and there's no such thing as leave politics out of it (for those getting ready to yell at me lol).

I've always read Richie's announcement to the nerds as a way to subliminally convey to the public that some wokeness is going to go down on the show (which I'm still waiting for). Calling out the incel, 4chan, Snydercut crowd who expectedly would naturally be a part of the audience in that manner couldn't have been for nothing on a show where every interaction has several layers of meaning under the surface. It is also very interesting to me that this announcement was made by the most reddit bro-y character on the show as at the time (and still current messiah of the reddit bros). Talk about a perfect messenger.

The general assumption is that Jess is the one and obvious choice for Richie. This is because people tend to naturally favour more heteronormative relationships and Jess is the only woman Richie has really had a close friendly interaction with apart from ladies of the bear family. Also he's been known to be in and pursue relationships with women.

And Jess is fine. She's beautiful, intelligent, ambitious, driven, kind and all the good stuff. If it is the story they want to tell, it makes sense. It is perfectly normal and interesting. They fit aesthetically in the desirability hierarchy of things which makes them acceptable to the wider audience and there's nothing wrong with being acceptable.

However, personally, I don't think that is Richie's story. It's a good story but I don't buy it. Interestingly, the possibility of Richie and Fak being genuinely into each other is never brought up in mainstream discussions and even any suggestion is dismissed even though these two have had very sexually charged interactions throughout the seasons. Everyone just assumes they can't be doing anything else but trying to be funny. Because Fak is the exact stereotype of the fat, gluttonous, idiot comic relief character.

But what if they're not?

2. Richie is written as a queer character

You can't pay attention to Richie, in my opinion, and not see that this guy has a little sugar in his tank. I wouldn't imagine there's a lot of people who see Richie as a straight guy (except his subjects on reddit). I know I've seen a few posts and comments on other platforms pegging him as bisexual at least.

Richie is written as a common trope in my opinion. He is the queer guy whose struggle and character arc is based on his identity. He has built his entire identity around things that can be taken away from him but who is he, really? When you take away his being Mickey's best friend and Tiff's (ex) husband and Eva's dad, who is he? He keeps trying to hold onto being a fringe Berzatto and the ex who wouldn't let go or the dad who wonders if he is enough of a dad because deep down he has a hard time accepting himself for him. He is all of those things but his struggle to define himself based on these things points to a struggle to accept himself as something else that is a crisis for him.

He is portrayed initially as a homophobic and sexist character all the while displaying very homoerotic behavior. He seems very strangely fixated on Fak, showing very aggressive homophobic and simultaneously homoerotic displays to him. He's is a very old and unpopular queer trope; the guy who struggles with his sexual identity and manifests it as a violent aggression towards the person he's most attracted to. Even his baseline bodily mannerisms and the way he carries himself subtly hint that he's a little sweet on the inside even as he tries his hardest to display classic toxic masculinity on the outside.

3. The material is there

Even as we sydcarmys scream that the crumbs for that romance has been strewn around since S1, this has also been happening for Fakrichie. The same way a lot of people never see Fak as a viable love interest is the same way a lot of people deny seeing it with Syd. It's a classic desexualization of certain characters on TV as a way to diminish their personhood. Even us sydcarmys are guilty of this as well and vice versa, because there are layers and filters to desirability politics and what is being perceived and allowed in media.

Richie is strangely obsessed with Neil Fak in my opinion. He zeros in on him once he's mentioned in the episode, eavesdrops on his conversation with Marcus, sexually harasses and bullies him (think Adam and Eric in Sex Education), singles him out unprovoked when Carmy is telling the story about the scar he got on Mickey's 15th birthday, works with him on fixing the machine in the S1 finale with all that flirty compliment Fak was giving him about getting stabbed.

We see him carry Neil along as he improves on his own lifestyle, getting him to not say the banned words, making him wear suits like him and being sweeter and more encouraging to him as he learns to be a better person himself. He defends Neil when he makes the hilarious mirepoix mistake during service. All in all, this could be explained as him having a soft spot for Fak.

The curious case of Phil

This is the scene where I firmly clocked Richie as queer. There is a scene that is never explained further in Dogs (an episode which I find very exposing for both Carmy and Richie).

Remember this guy?

Phil.

There was never a real explanation for why this very short but insanely odd and charged interaction took place. The way this guy came by and made Richie clearly uncomfortable- calling him by his full name "Richard", the only time anyone ever called him that on the show with Richie mumbling a response not wanting to engage with him.

He looks clearly hurt by Richie's lack of acknowledgement and very abruptly walks away

Cicero of course notices the strangeness of the interaction and comments as much wondering whether Richie had ruined any of his property with his neglectfulness which Richie jumps on and explains in terms of what was happening between him and Cicero at that moment. What Richie never actually does is answer honestly what the real deal actually was between him and that guy. He just deflects.

Richie is been known to love to squabble. He's not afraid to get in a fight with anyone especially guys like him. But this guy? Crickets. He couldn't wait for him to get out of there. Why was that?

For me I read it as him encountering someone he had a secret with. He wouldn't acknowledge him because he wasn't ready to deal with that side of his identity. The DL queer man. If he had tried to have a conversation with him it probably would have been too obvious so he avoids it and so does the show.

Another thing I noticed was how the guy looked. Does he bear a resemblance to anyone else on the show? The chubby guy with a mustache? To me he looks like Fak in another font. Just a cleaner, more put together and a thinner version of Neil Fak. So not only that Richie might like men, he might actually have a type LOL.

I'm even suspicious of this interaction

I feel like it was awkward and charged for no reason. The way this guy kept beating around the bush with the subject as if he was going to say something more serious, only ending up just saying that he should have given Richie a heads up? The conversation felt like a waste of time to me (the only interaction I hated more than Claire's) which is why I started overthinking it. I feel like more was being said than what was said. I feel like they know each other way more than what is being shown here.

There may have been a hint that the Berzattos know him a little more than just the guy Tiff got with after Richie. Their relationship with Frank seems to go way beyond that based on this little sneak (now, of course, it could be a different person but what are the odds?)

However, whatever extent to this relationship is not known. In fact, the history of Richie and Tiff's relationship has been neglected through the storyline and that might throw some light on this. But the conversation feels weird to me. The way it seemed like Frank had more to say and Richie had his guard fully up. Frank commenting about his looks in the middle of this "important" conversation. He was talking to Richie like he knew him differently to what was assumed all along. Cornplating? Maybe. But it still seemed very strange and left a lot to be seen.

All of this is to say that there's enough material to explore Richie's arc as a queer man coming into himself and finding love in a relationship that has been there and has been fleshing out under the surface. Classic slow burn style.

4. Subverting tropes and stereotypes

A trope is a plot structure, theme, storyline, character trait, motif, or plot device that is commonly used in storytelling.

There are a million tropes you can find in the storytelling of The Bear. They deliberately lean in ever so slightly into those tropes with the aim of subverting, upholding, subverting the subversions and so on and so forth. There's so much going on in there.

The characters are also very archetypal, as expected, with some leaning ever so slightly into the stereotypical. Now the problem with stereotypes is not the image in itself, because characters like these actually exist, but in the perception and subsequent flattening of whole groups to that image, making the stereotype.

Not to wax too academical about it, I'm trying to say, for example, fat, gluttonous, goofy people do exist but fat people do not exist solely to be gluttonous and goofy. And there are many iterations of this but I want to focus on the fatphobia of it all and Fak for now.

Society and media has made fat people a subject of derision and the butt of jokes. It's like they exist in media only to make people laugh and to be laughed at, so much so that they almost seem to have no value as anything else. You see a fat person on your screen, you instinctively expect them to be comic relief. Then especially when they fit that bill, it is almost an absolute impossibility to also see them as people who could be an object of desire or adoration.

Sydcarmy has received pushback from the media simply because, in as much as they deny it, they can see the potential of them breaking out of a particular trope they love to see with a black female lead. They write unnecessary think pieces waxing lyrical about the beauty of complex platonic relationships because they do not want to see Syd as an object of Carmy's desire. They have to do this because one thing they can't deny is that Syd is objectively beautiful and believable as desirable.

But with Fakrichie, it's absolute crickets. I haven't even seen a just for fun article about the chemistry between them and if it means something, haha. And this is even after Ebon has kissed Matty on live television!! It's like Fak doesn't even exist. I saw a random post talking about the brotherly love between Richie and Fak and they didn't mean the Philadelphia kind. Sure, they've joked about "calling mom" and all that but I doubt (normal) brothers want to dry hump each other in the bathroom.

Now I'm not saying Fakrichie is absolutely a thing or have to be. Maybe all he's meant to be is a fat gluttonous goofy character. Maybe Storer meant for him solely to be a joke as per usual. Maybe all that flirting and tenderness is meant to be for the laughs after all, because fat people amarite?

But imagine if it wasn't a joke. Imagine if Storer set this up to shake things up by making them real lovers. Imagine if a character can be fat and even goofy and still be an object of desire and adoration to another objectively beautiful main character. Imagine if this wasn't some fucked up queer bait (maybe alongside an equally fucked up straight bait) but a real slow burn love story simultaneously happening.

Goofy? Nah, I think, iconic!

[thatoneguydownthestreet]

Howdy! I was wondering what the twst guys would do if apocalypse mc came to twisted wonderland with a rifle and handgun? Like rook learning they can be used for hunting or lilias reaction to the weapons of war from their world

You don’t have to write this! I’ve just been brainrotting about this 😮‍💨

Anyway thanks for your time!💕💕

I really need to add a character limit to this.

I'm doing one from the first 5 dorms and if you want more characters I'll get to them once requested open again.

FEM ALIGNED DNI

Yuu pronouns are he/him

Characters: Ace (technicallyduece too ig), ruggie, jade, kalim, and rook

Warnings: Dueces slight suicidal ideation, ruggies lowkey nihilism, you kill a monster in Jades part, slight body horror in Kalims part, not proof read

________________________________

Ace:

Ace was pissed. Why? Because he was fucking stupid.

He was stupid. Duece was stupid. And that weird kids with the weird mask and the fucking fire monster was fucking stupid.

Because someone thought it would be a great idea to run away from their clean up duty (Grim (ace quietly chose to ignore that he had tried to do the same thing first)) by hiding in a chandelier was a good idea, and someone else thought hurling him into said chandelier with questionable at best magic was an even better idea.

So now ace trappola was running for his life in a crystal mine, with only the same people who got him into this situation in the first place here with him.

These feelings only seemed to be amplified after duece decided that the crystals were worth more than his life! Also it didn't exactly help that he had seen the magicless guy almost get impaled with one of the oversized pickaxes that...that thing was swinging around.

"My....m.y..Give me back..my. STONES"

The adrenaline rushed through aces body like a wave, it's only purpose being to make sure he survives dammit! He doesn't even care if he gets expelled anymore. His brother has told him enough stories about NRC to write a novel. Ace had come here with a picture already painted in his head and this was not it.

He made a sharp turn left. They had walked down this tunnel on their way in right?

He saw a little light poke out just around the next turn.

Yeah, they had come through this way.

Ace heard a small yelp and the sound of dirt being scattered and a small thud of someone hitting the ground.

He didn't look back. He just kept running.

He kept running until he came across the small cottage that they'd gone into earlier. Duece stumbled in right after him. The masked boy and the fire cat-weasle thing on his shoulders.

The guy was covered in dirt. He's probably the one that fell.

Ace was bent over, panting like he had just ran for his life, probably because he did, but he's pretty sure he heard duece half gently set the kid, whose name he still didn't really know, down before he joined ace in his desperate attempt to catch his breath.

Ace closed his eyes. What the hell is happening right now? Why was he here? Why did he have to go tease that weird magicless freak this morning and pick a fight with their freaky cat?

You know what? Fuck this. If he gets expelled, so be it. There are plenty of other magic schools, including ones closer to home. He'll be just fine.

Duece however, didn't seem to get the memo.

"It was right there...we have to go back!", duece had so much determination in his voice...

Ace felt his eye twitch. "Like hell we do!"

Duece snapped his head towards him, and the mystery bro was still sitting on the floor, now cradling grim like he was an actual cat.

"Yeah, no. Sorry, but that crystal ain't worth it"

"So...so you're just gonna take the expulsion lying down? Just like that!? What are you, some kind of coward!?", duces voice got progressively more angry, which ace thought was bullshit.

He thought he was being perfectly reasonable with his choices, thank you very much.

"Uhhh. Yeah! Sorry not sorry, I choose life!"

I mean sure, his brother is gonna look at him all disappointed and shit, but hey, at least he'd be alive to see it.

Ace looked back at Mr. Mask-Man, who was still quietly petting grim, acting like they weren't even there.

It kind of pissed him off a little.

"Hey", he looked up, Ace count see their eyes, but somehow he knew they weren't making eye contact "do you have any better ideas? Or are you just gonna sit there the while time and not do anything?"

Was he being unfair? Probably. This guy (he should really ask for his name) wasn't even supposed the be in night Raven college, not to mention here? And he probably didn't want to be here any more than he did.

Did he care about that though? No. Not right now anyway.

Ace expected him to just put his head back down and go back to petting his freaky weasel. He expected them to just shrink up on themselves while ace went back to yelling at duece.

He did expect the guys head to perk up the smallest bit, he didn't expect the sudden feeling of very intense eye contact either.

And he definitely didn't expect him the nod and stand up so fast ace almost stumbled back.

But you know what the absolute last thing he expected from this guy? Going back to the mines.

Going back to the mines and waiting with duece for grim and the masked guy to come hauling ass back up the hill with the ...inky monster in tow. Because that's what's going to happen. Apparently.

...fuck. This guy was some type of maniac wasn't he?

Ace just glared at the ground. There wasn't anything he could do about it now, but he was still gonna be pissed if he died with a possible psychopath currently running towards him, and this blue gumball son of a bitch standing next to him.

"Bring me....my...stooones!"

He took a deep breath, possibly one of his lasts.

But I mean hey, might as well go out with a bang right?

The next few minutes all seemed to happen in slow motion, and somehow ace could already see the moment when the reality of all this would all hit him. At 3 am or something like that. Probably.

...yeah. 3 am.

"Ace watch out!", a panicked, exhausted voice called out to him. Probably duece.

His head snapped over to where his dormmate was. What's happening?

The answer seemed pretty damn obvious, when a large shadow seemed to swallow him whole, a product of the monsters looming stature.

Ace froze. Seeing his life start to flash before his eyes. Memory after memory replaying in his mind.

You never really know how little you've lived until you see it all right in front of you...

BAM.

Aces eyes shot open (when had he closed them?) To see Mr. Mask standing just roughly six meters away from him, holding a...

...uh....what the hell was that?

BAM. BAM. BAM.

The loud noises rang out one by one. One right after the other.

Ace booked it to the side, trying to catch his breath.

Only for it to get caught again once he looked up.

The creatures head, the glass ink jar, was leaking. It had six small holes in it, and cracks spiderwebbing out from said holes. As the cracks grew larger, the glass began to break off, and more and more ink began to pour out.

"Duece!"

Aces eyes snapped to their third member, who responded immediately with another cauldron.

The head finally shattered. And the monster disappeared.

Slowly, aces gaze fell on the Ramshakle resident once again. Blinking slowly as he watched the guy put the...loud..thing away, before picking up grim once again.

Ace opened his mouth, and before he could even begin to realize what he was doing, he asked, "what was that?"

You called it a gun.

Ruggie:

Listen. Ruggie wasn't new to violence. You can't live in the slums all your life and make it out completely sheltered, no matter how hard your parents try.

And sure. Ruggie wasn't exactly a saint himself, But at this point, was anyone? He certainly didn't think so.

Yeah. Almost getting killed by leona fucked him up a little. But really, it wasn't that new when he really thought about it.

And yeah, leona never really apologized to him for all that, but at times like that, in an environment like savanaclaw? He didn't need to. His actions, no matter how small they were, still spoke for themselves.

So yeah. Ruggie bucchi has a lot of experience with violence.

But if you were to ask ruggie if he's ever seen anything like this before? Yeah. He'd have to answer no.

Everything was going shit. They were following the plan, he did his part flawlessly might he add, and then Azul decided he didn't want to follow the script. So now he was surround by black ink, panicking students, and slightly less panicking... allies? Allies.

But yeah. This sucked.

And so began the fight for his life once again. Honestly, this shit was getting old.

Whipping his head in every which way to look or for flying debris and tentacles (and wasn't that a sentence), and keeping his ears open for shouted commands and warnings, his attention landed on you for half a second, before quickly turning away; In that half second he saw you pull something out from jacket pocket.

About five seconds later, he heard a loud bang.

And not like when the construction workers accidentally drop a metal beam on concrete or something. No, this was just a loud, earth shattering bang that demanded attention. And attention it got.

Several heads snapped to you, holding a...uhhh. You tilted your head to the side, either in confusion or trying to get an angle on Azul.

BANG BANG

And then there was a scream, distorted and pained, with a faint sound of gushing and sloshing, a liquid being spilled. Ink being spilled out of the overblot phantoms head.

"Huh...the other one just died immediately..", he heard you mutter.

Ruggie shot a pointed look over to leona, who just looked at him in confusion. Ok. So he didn't miss anything during his housewardens little episode. He took a quick glance at the heartslabyul duo, who looked like they understood. Well, Ace understood. Duece wasn't close enough to hear and didn't have the hearing to pick up the slack.

Ok. So maybe yuu also decided to whip the thing out when riddle when crazy? He'll ask around later. Probably.

A tentacle slammed right next to him and started writhing around with another loud scream as the phantom lost more and more ink, and Ruggie remembered where they were.

The damage you did the overbloted octopus wasn't enough to downright defeat him, but it was enough to at least make the rest of the way a hell of a lot easier. So they're odds were looking much better than they were. Small mercies.

When everything eventually came to a head and the ink was beginning to melt off of Azul and he could finally breathe, he let his mind drift back to you.

Ok. What the hell. What was that? Why did it make that noise? What did it even do? How'd it shatter thick ass, magic glass? Did it launch blades at it or something? Also, why are you pretending like this whole thing was completely normal?

You weren't freaking out about this, you honestly seemed more focused on combing the gunk out of Azuls hair with your gloved fingers while the twins tried to asses his mental state, grim flopping on the ground off to your side. Now, this is probably your third, or maybe even fourth time you've been in this situation. But perfect, you treating it like it's just another Tuesday isn't exactly. Uh. Normal?

Not that you were normal, you had just began taking regular baths, which he was immensely grateful for. Seriously, he could only hold back leonas hair as he puked so many times before it got old. But even your (lack of) personality raised a few questions. Sometimes he wondered if you where really even there half the time.

After he caught his breath, he began to walk over to where you were, Ace and duece now scolding you and jade trying to check if you were hurt or not, and holy shit that is a big ass gash.

But he was already standing right behind you, so he honestly might as well ask.

"Hey. So uh. What did you do? What made the bangs?"

Your head snapped in his direction, pausing to just stare at him for a few unnerving seconds.

And then you pulled something out and called it a gun.

Jade:

Jade didn't really question why you wanted to join his club, he was just glad someone did. Even if that someone was a fucking weirdo like yourself.

Listen, jade wasn't picky when it came to his clubmembers ok?

Plus, aside from a few conversations about a bird or plant species you liked, and many more questions about basic things that you had apparently never seen before, and him acting like he knew any better than you about it, things went smoothly.

He collected his mushrooms and occasionally stopped to do a fieldsketch and you rolled around in moss and somehow became an instant bird whisperer. It was a good system.

About as good as it could be while you were running from a big ass monster.

Ok. Listen. He knew that there were monsters on this particular mountain, and he knew that some of them were man eaters. But dammit he did the research before hand! He made sure the two of you avoided their natural habitats at all cost! But apparently, this particular one could smell human blood much better than the rest, and apparently, you thought it was a good idea to not tell him you had cut yourself on a rock and were now bleeding.

"There's a cave right there!", he saw you point to an opening in a rock wall that was most definitely the small least cave he'd ever seen "do you think we could hide in it for a minute"

"I don't know!", you didn't really have any other options, running forever until you reached the place where the mirror had dropped you both off was more than inconvenient, especially on a mountain that had more steep cliffs than average. So he quickly signaled to you and began running towards it, awkwardly running into the small hole and barely seeing you baseball slide your way into there with much more ease.

Desperately trying to catch his breath, he started to plan. You only had a few minutes at best before the monster caught up to you, so the best thing they could do with the time they had was treat your wound to the best of his ability, and hope that the smell of blood would gradually fade and the beast would be thrown off your trails.

Click

He looked to you, hunched over and sill slightly panting as you loaded small, but long pointed metal cylinders into...something?

You had stopped wearing the mask, being one of the few people you trusted enough to see your face, which was sweet if he thought about, you were even getting better to look at! Looking a lot less like you had come back from the dead after the apocalypse and more like a recovering drug addict, but hey! Progress!

But he point is, he could see your face, and the look on your eyes, and...

Ah shit.

Perfect. Listen perfect, he knows you're batshit crazy, he is too, but please, you're going to get them killed. Even with your insane amount of luck, your half baked plans only work most of the time so for the love of the sea witch please just-

"I have an idea"

...Dammit.

So that's how you both got here, kneeling just barely out of the cave opening, and him standing on the Rocky formation right above you outside the cave. Waiting for the monster, and possi ly for death. If he survives this the first things he'd doing when he gets back to his dorm room is write his will so that he can make sure his precious mushrooms aren't thrown away by his brother. Would riddle accept them?

"Jade!"

He blinked, got his magic pen ready, and you cocked your gun. Staring at the place where the sound of heavy footsteps and snarls were coming from.

You both waited with baited breath as themonsters form came running up the steep hill and charged towards the two of you.

The sensation of water and earth magics filled the air as spell after spell was released, hitting the creature a good majority of the time. Meanwhile, you were shifting slightly, getting into a position that didn't look the most comfortable, but apparently it worked for you because you quickly gave him a small warning shout.

Jade covered his ears. You had warned him about the sound guns make, and how many people went deaf fro them due to lack of proper equipment and training, you sounded like you were repeating a quote that was all but drilled into you, a saying that everyone knows but never really says out loud. Did he belive you were exaggerating? Slightly.

That went away when he heard the loud boom though, even through his covered ears. Jade grew slightly concerned at the fact that you didnt seem to be too affected by all this.

You didn't seem too surprised at the loud noise. Just angling and adjusting the gun position until you could hit your target more accurately as it moved.

He heard ten shots go off. Out of those ten, at least seven actually hit. The monster, being as huge as it was, was about to ignore the first three. The rest, however, were clearly starting to take a toll on the thing.

He saw you pull the trigger a few more times, nothing more than assumed clicks coming out. Jade couldn't be too sure, as the pained roars of the monster completely drowned out the sound. Wordlessly, he got took his hands away from his ears and readied his magic. Letting it burst all around him and borage the monster as soon as your hand shot up into the air. The signal that you needed to reload and he had to momentarily take over.

The whole event took about fifteen minutes that felt like they were stretched into hours. Ending with him feeling a bit lightheaded, and you firing three extra shots into what he was pretty sure was a monstrous corpse. "Just in case".

Wanting to sit down and take a moment to collect himself was only just outweighed by the urge to make sure you were alright. So, jade jumped down from his little rock podium; he reached the ground just as you completely crawled out of the cave entrance.

Gently, he asked, "are you alright perfect?". A perfectly appropriate question to ask after...that.

To which you, in reply, completely flop down on the rough ground and let out a loud groan, both of you pretending that there wasn't a dead, three-metter tall monster right next to you.

An equally appropriate response.

"Four magazines jade! Four! I'm going to have to make soany bullets now!", jade only nodded, like how you do when he starts ranting about his beloved mushrooms.

Oh well, he'd understand soon enough. He has plenty of questions regarding you and you gun for the walk back to the mirror location.

Kalim:

Kalim felt like was caving in on him.

This was all happening so fast, way too fast. The one person that he thought he could trust whole heartedly, the boy he saw as nothing less than a brother, had done all this.

It was a lot to take in. Everything from his supposed verdict of keeping his dorm members in school, to yuu and grims vague comments, comments that he now recognizes for the warnings they were, to the guys from octavinnle, jamil overblotting, getting flung to the dessert, and now to be back here? Fighting for not only his, but his best friends (were they though?) Life?

Kalim just wanted to cry. The drop the the floor and cry. But he'd already done that and there was no time to do it again now. Not when he could see the ink and the snakes sucking out more and more of jamils life, when he could see jamils body begin the break down and contort in ways that shouldn't be possible. Not when his eyes grew more deranged with every second.

No, Kailm couldn't cry now. Not when Jamil was dying.

Magic attacks meeting the emotions of dread and rage that jamil had kept professionally buried only served made the air more tense. Yuu occasionally shouted directions from he sidelines, directions to use fire magic instead of water, or to dodge an incoming attack that very well could have killed him if it made contact.

And that just raises the question. Did jamil..? Was it his intention to kill him? Was that his goal the entire time?

....No. No, if Jamil wanted Kailm dead, then Kailm would be dead. He didn't want Kailm gone he just wanted him to go away. And for that reason, Kailm had the hope that he needed that he could fix this. And by the seven he'll cling to it for as long as he lives if that's what it takes.

"Perfect!", Jades sharp voice took Kailm right out of his thoughts.

"Yeah? Kailm move to the right!", he moved to the right, just in time for a borage of ink and thron covered vines to come crashing into the exact spot he was standing not even five seconds prior. The vines writhing around like they were alive, and he could see the sharp, jagged edges of its thorns cut into its self with the ease of cutting through soft butter. Not that he would know. "What do you need?"

"Do you have your gun?", Jade svoice was deathly calm, which was a bit jarring all things considered.

He didn't know what a "gun" was, but he guesses floyd knew, because he groaned louder than some of his youngest siblings when they had to get up early.

From out the corner of his eye, he saw you stop for a few seconds. Then you answered.

"Yeah", something in your voice that he couldn't quite read. "Yeah, but I only have like five shots"

Both jade and azul looked less than pleased with that, and Kailm still didn't know what was going on, so he just threw more fire at his friend.

"Well then. You better make them count", azuls matter of fact voice rang out.

He didn't see if you nodded or not. And for the next minute, he didn't hear you at all. There were no more instructions being shouted or anything like that. Just the continued onslaught of four peoples magic, all trying desperately to snap Jamil out of his current state. Who was being bent into more and more inhuman shapes as the seconds passed.

His jaw was opening a little too wide as he laughed, his fingers seemed to be getting longer and more claw like, and his voice was so now so distorted that he could barely even understand what he was saying.

But what freaked him out the most what the loud cracking and crunches of bones breaking. Jamils spine now seemed too long, bent in an unnatural way, accompanied by a crack everytime he moved. He only laughed.

Kalim didn't laugh. There was ink running down his body, all from where he had been contorted. And as time crawled on, his eyes grew more and more crazed, and his distorted laughs turned more like screams.

Kalim wasn't the best at magic, he had never been the best at magic, he knew that, even before now. So when he felt himself become light headed as his energy and magic supply ran low, he started to panic.

Oh no. Oh sevens, oh no. Please no. Not now. Anytime but now. He couldn't lose now. What would happen to jamil? How would he get Jamil home after this?

How was he supposed to tell Jamils family that their son and brother was dead?

BANG

A distorted scream ran out as floyd began to cheer, and his stomach dropped.

BANG BANG BANG

More screams. Blood curdling screams that froze Kalim where he stood. Watching jamils face begin the crack, ink pouring through the cracks on his face like blood as his eyes rolled back and his entire expression turned to one of pain. A perfect mirror to the shattering phantom that loomed behind him.

"I have one shot left and I am not wasting it! Aim for the cracks! Use fire! It'll weaken the glass!", your voice rang out, carrying a determination with it, but also the reality that they were in no way out of the woods yet.

"You mean the magic glass?", azul was skeptical

"Its magic fire", Kailm could hear the shrug in your voice.

Kalim is ashamed to admit it. But he wasn't much help after this. Jamils vpice had random breaks from the distortion. So he had a perfect audio of jamil screaming his vocal cords raw in his actual voice. Something that would haunt him until the day he died.

Ink was still pouring out from his wounds. Bones were still breaking. And it almost looked like Jamils body was melting off of him in a grotesque manner.

Kalim closed his eyes and prayed.

Eventual, the distortion completely went away, so the screams and the sobs seemed less monstrous and more tortured. Jamils attacks completely stopped as well.

And with one final bang, so did yours.

When Kalim opened his eyes again, I was only after jade prayed his hands off his ears, something he doesn't even remember doing.

Azul and yuu were standing over jamils blood covered body, and for a second, he feared the worst.

It was only after you kneeled to check if he was still alive, and he saw Jamil moving did he allow himself to breathe, and to finally cry.

Through blurred vision, he saw you put the gun away. He never asked what it was. He didn't need to know. You saved Jamils life with it, and that was good enough for him.

Rook:

Rook enjoyed beanfeast. Honestly, he could say it was one of his favorite days of the year. What other time? What other opportunities would he get but this? To hunt his fellow classmates for sport like this? To see their determination wither away as they accepted their fates as his prey!

Now, normally rook would go solo on this. Others found it a bit hard to keep up with him until now. Until yuu.

Ah his dear little trickster and his admirable kill or be killed mentality that he had taken up as of late! My, when rook had looked into his eyes, he saw nothing less than the eyes of a killer! A tiger on the hunt!

Or perhaps, he mused, a lion. Because there, right underneath them, was leona kingscholar himself.

Yuu has proposed they move from above, to stay in the wooded area and maintain the high grounds. Yuu had made his way up a tree with the swiftness and elegance of a bird taking flight! Walking steadily along the branches like he was simply made for it.

Together, the two of you had taken out quite a few farmers. With rook silently stalking them and you communicating your predictions with hand signals that he could understand blind. Those predictions of what the farmers would do, or even who would be in the area were proven true to an uncanny extent.

Rook wanted to know how, but that conversation could be saved for a different day.

Rook could barely see you chest rising up and down as you breathed so slowly you might as well haven't have been. He himself was holding his breath as you both angled your bean blasters. The slightest noise could tip the beastman off, after all.

You had temporarily split off to different trees, him being about a dozen meters away from you, just to the left of Leona, while we're were to the right.

He saw you hand slowly raise up, carefully avoiding the rustling leaves as you gave another hand signal. Thos one being significantly more simple than the majority. Just three fingers raised to indicate three seconds. Three seconds and you both shoot. You closed you hand, starting the timer.

Three.

The two of you, perfectly in sync, found your final aims of the beastman.

Two.

You carefully placed your fingers on the trigger. Taking caution not to shoot too early. The last thing would want to do was ruin this seemingly special moment for the two of you.

The wind blew in you direction. Thre leaves began to rustle, and leonas head shot in your direction.

Three.

You both pulled your triggered in perfect harmony, and, like a beautiful dance coming to an end, the mighty lion had fallen. And you both ran across the tree branches, making your ways to eachother as soon as possible.

The happy, adrenaline filled giggle you let out when he finally found found you again was nothing less than precious. Not to mention it fit the moment. Oh how he wishes you would stop trying to compose yourself all the time! The world deserves to see your joy!

He let out a laugh of his own, being rewarded with a smile that you couldn't help. This imagine of you in perfect juxtaposition with how you looked upon first arrival to this world.

And, if he may, rook would like to say that your face was shaping up to be something he wouldn't mind staring at. Ah, recovery was a marvelous thing indeed! He couldn't wait to see your progress by the end if the year.

When the laughter subsided, you took you hand and laid a gentle kiss to the back of your fingers, as a small congregation and a job well done.

"Yes, very nice monsieur. That was very nice indeed", his soft voice suddenly taking on a more mischievous note to it, a not that you matched with those shinning eyes of yours. "Now, I belive we have more game to secure, yes? Let us be off, my dear trickster"

You smiled, the corners of your mouth moving into a smirk. Your eyes, however, he'll the glee of a giddy boy, finally getting to experience something he was robbed of long ago. Rook only hoped that much later in your life, when you think of how many shots you've ever fired, this day will be included.

So smile, dear trickster, that all he asks. That's all you deserve.

________________________________

YALL I AM SO SORRY."I'm working on requests" fucks off your 5 more months omg what am I on. Eat your food, yall gotta be starving rn shit I am a terrible father.

[alien--cookie]

I'm like 8 years too late, but oh well - I've had this Captain America Civil War rant stuck in my head for a while and I need to get it out after re-watching it. (This is gonna be long af, but bear with me).

I feel like a lot of people missed the actual point and plot of the movie (and the marketing definitely didn't help). The whole "team cap vs team iron man" stuff becomes irrelevant after like the first 20 minutes of the movie. But of course, it's still quite a big part of the movie and I'd like to take a moment to explore what I think, the different character motivations are around why they signed or didn't (or would / wouldn't).

The only reason Tony "I successfully privatised world peace" Stark signed the accords in the first place anyway is because of his massive survivors guilt complex which we see triggered by the woman who approaches him at the end of his speech to the MIT students. Like this man does not give a single shit about the government, and much like Steve Rogers, he just wants to keep people safe. Unlike Steve, however, he doesn't trust himself to do so and thinks of himself needing the be kept in check, for someone else to take the blame (though he'd probably internalise it anyway, let's be real).

Rhodey has always kind of been more on the side of the government, even if that meant going against Tony - think Iron Patriot - so it makes sense that he'd want to sign. He understands that a group as powerful and dangerous as the Avengers needs to be kept in check, but what he doesn't understand are the risks around that. In a perfect world, it would be fine, but unfortunately government systems are stupid and corrupt.

Peter was only really in the fight in the first place because he was a child blindly following this big celebrity guy he idolised. He didn't know enough about the situation to properly analyse it, just being fed and believing whatever Tony told him (and he had no reason to go against him, so why would he? This was his shot, he's been chosen by THE Tony Stark to help). "Mr Stark said you'd say that" "he said you're wrong, you think you're right, that makes you dangerous." I 100% believe that if Peter had read the accords, that he would have been on Steve's side anyway.

Vision is an embodiment of 'good' and 'peace' - essentially everything that Ultron was supposed to be, but wasn't. He has no reason to be against the accords if it will keep people safe and he makes the point during their conversation of "our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict ... breeds catastrophe. Oversight ... oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand." It's also very much the beginning kind of puppy love between him and Wanda in this movie, meaning that he will want to protect her. No matter what. Even if it means "locking her in her room."

Nat was seriously one of the only people in this movie with a brain cell lol. I firmly believe that if the accords had been properly put in place, she would have followed them until she no longer thought the government's instructions were 'right' and would have gone against them anyway. Her main goal in this movie was trying to keep the Avengers, her family, together and ultimately do the 'right' thing.

T'challa didn't give one shit about the accords lmao, he's damn king. No, he was only there in the first place to take revenge on his father's death (which at the point of the airport fight scene he still thought it was Bucky's fault. He later discovers, after following Steve and Bucky to Siberia, that it's Zemo's, and locks him up).

Steve's concerns with the accords are valid, and honestly I wouldn't have signed them either. To be told "sign, retire, or get locked up" isn't really a big winner for me lol. And the thing is, Steve's done this. He fought in WW2, he got paraded around like some big hero while men died, and he did nothing. It wasn't until he went against orders, that he actually did something helpful (saved the captured 107th division in Azzano). So, no, he's not going to be side-lined when people out there need help. That's just not who he is.

Bucky had no part in the accords, and as soon as he got introduced into the movie, that plot point became irrelevant. He was framed by Zemo, and then used to rip the avengers apart. The accords was just another log to add to the fire at that point. He followed Steve because "till the end of the line" and all that. He literally, heartbreakingly, says "I don't know if I'm worth all this," but he follows anyway.

Scott, much like Peter, is kinda just happy to be there. He's following CAPTAIN FREAKING AMERICA into battle without hesitation. But like, let's be honest, given his whole movie and character, I very much doubt Scott would be on Tony's side if he had read the accords.

Clint got dragged out of freaking retirement for this shit, and he didn't actually get involved until after Team Cap already knew about Zemo. That's why he's there. Not because of the accords, but to help Steve get to the Quinjet to get to Siberia and stop Zemo before he can go through with his assumed plan to wake up the five super soldiers who'd been stashed there. (Of course, this isn't actually Zemo's plan, but we'll get back to that later).

Wanda is going through some serious self loathing during this movie, and the incident in Lagos doesn't help. Like at all. Ma girl just wants to live her life and be left alone at this point and she's getting all of these horrible things thrown into her face by Secretary Ross. She doesn't want to be controlled, she doesn't want to be a weapon, she wants to be free. "You locked me in my room." - Girl already probably hates Tony Stark due to her family being killed by one of his bombs and Ultron, so she's mad anyway.

Sam is on Steve's side from the start. With the accords, to fight Zemo, all of it. During the 'discussion' between him and Rhodey, he says "So let's say we agree to this thing. How long is it gonna be before they LoJack us like a bunch of common criminals?" He doesn't trust Secretary Ross, and is clearly hesitant to add his signature to the accords. (not that I blame him).

The main actual villain and 'plot' of the movie after the first part with the accords, was the whole thing with Zemo wanting to tear the Avengers apart to get revenge for his family dying in Sokovia. He takes advantage of the accords, and of Bucky / The Winter Soldier to do this but it's not really discussed which annoys me. It's a MAJOR part of the film, yet all I ever really see being discussed are the accords affecting the decisions of characters throughout the film with no consideration of the wider picture.

From when the UN meeting is blown up, the Avengers are being manipulated by Zemo working in the background throughout the film. He frames Bucky for murder, and Steve - who has been looking for Bucky for the past 2 years - goes after him like ‘tf man’. Bucky gets taken in and Zemo uses the opportunity to activate the Winter Soldier programming, learn about Hydra’s super soldier program, and of course - “Mission report. December 16, 1991.”

This leads to Bucky’s escape and attack, Steve and co going on the run, and eventually the airport fight. The meaning of this scene gets lost, I feel, when people relate it back to the accords because it’s not about that anymore. Not really, not for anyone. Especially not for Steve, or even for Tony.

Tony at this point, most definitely feels like his world is being torn apart. He’s losing control, he’s spiralling, and Steve just isn’t listening. He’s blinded by his anger to the bigger picture and he just wants to get a handle on the situation to deal with it further.

Steve’s forgotten all about the accords, his priority is keeping Bucky safe and stopping Zemo. He tries to tell Tony, tries to talk to him, but Tony isn’t listening either. I mean their whole interaction just before the fight shows this:

(the dialogue below has been condensed to show the key lines - basically I got rid of other characters talking irrelevantly)

-

Steve Rogers: Hear me out, Tony. That doctor, the psychiatrist, he's behind all of this.

Tony Stark: Anyway, Ross gave me 36 hours to bring you in. That was 24 hours ago. Can you help a brother out?

Steve Rogers: You're after the wrong guy.

Tony Stark: Your judgment is askew. Your old war buddy killed innocent people yesterday.

Steve Rogers: And there are five more super soldiers just like him. I can't let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can't.

- later -

Tony Stark: And you've been a complete idiot. Dragging in Clint. 'Rescuing' Wanda from a place she doesn't even want to leave, a safe place. I'm trying to keep . . . I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart.

Steve Rogers: You did that when you signed.

Tony Stark: Alright, We're done. You're gonna turn Barnes over, you're gonna come with us. NOW! Because it's us! Or a squad of J-SOC guys . . . with no compunction about being impolite. [Steve looks aside.] Come on.

-

Not to mention that Tony, after learning that Zemo impersonated and killed the actual doctor dude that was supposed to see Bucky whilst he was in confinement, he DISOBEYED the accords and Secretary Ross to go and help Steve stop what they thought at the time was the reactivation of the five super soldiers who'd been left in cryo freeze.

He follows Steve and Bucky to Siberia to help them, not to fight them. That only changes because of Zemo showing the footage of Bucky, WHILE UNDER BASICALLY MIND CONTROL, killing Tony’s parents.

In this scene, Tony 100% has every right to be angry. Unfortunately, he’s the kind of person who cannot see past his anger. He gets in his head, he spirals, and he tries to kill Bucky based on blind rage. (IT WASN’T BUCKY’S FAULT DAMMIT).

And yes, Steve was 100% in the wrong for not telling Tony. This whole scene could have been very easily avoided if Steve had just pulled Tony aside and had the difficult conversation about his parents death. Tony deserved to know, and Steve was only sparing himself pain by doing it. Dick move Steve, 0/10.

The fight between the three allows Zemo, having successfully completed his plan of eliminating the super soldiers and tearing the avengers apart, to slip away. With his work done, he tries to end his own life, but T’challa stops him and arrests him instead.

Steve and Tony’s fight was unnecessary, dramatic, and heart-breaking, and I’m very glad they managed to make up later, but ye. I think, at the end of the day, they’re all just dramatic idiots with communication issues lol.

-

Thank you for reading my long ass essay lmao, apparently I have a lot of feelings about this movie 😂

[pandapool]

-- Panda's Poolverine Recs -- ❤️‍🩹Hurt/Comfort Edition❤️‍🩹

an inconclusive list of Hurt/Comfort Poolverine Fics I've read & enjoyed

💛 You've begun to feel like home by Katirina_caffrey Mature | 15,7K

3 time Wade and Logan hurt each other, +1 time they healed each other.

❤️ i wanna know what it's like to feel your heart beating from the inside by NotesAppWitch Explicit | 15,3K

“Warm like…” Wade hears himself say, and he slurs a little because he’s actually drooling. “Like good warm.” “Good warm,” Logan repeats uncertainly. He says it like Wade is dumb, like he’s a dumb idiot and he’s gonna yell at him and make him feel a little stupid and Wade loves when he does that. Wade can feel Logan’s eyes on him, mean and hot and heavy on the bit of Wade’s exposed face and then lower, down his heaving chest to where Wade is twitching his hips up against nothing, desperate. “Wade,” Logan scolds, and Wade swallows back a little noise at his name being used so harshly and in that tone. “Now is not the fuckin’ time.” “Would you believe me, babygirl, if I said that this time—“ the car hits a tiny bump and Wade makes a little mmh! “—this time it’s not me?” “What are you saying? That the powder in the bullet made you horny?” he laughs wryly. “Sure you don’t just have a thing for guns?” “I have a well established thing for guns,” Wade pants as he grinds a hand against himself through his suit just to relieve some fucking pressure. “As do you, mon petit chou.”

💛 Feel Good, Broken Man by farmhandler Explicit | 11,5K

Logan lifted his head to watch Wade walk into the room like he hadn’t just done the electric slide with a toaster and plop into the chair next to Logan. “Penny for your thoughts, peanut?” “Don’t fucking call me that,” Logan rumbled. “I mean it, Wade.” “You don’t actually hate it, do you? This is just our thing. I call you a cutesy nickname and you react like it’s the worst thing you’ve ever been called. You think about punching me. I think about that passionate kiss we shared, more often than I should or is healthy. Then we move on and do it all over again.” Logan leaned back in his chair and sighed. He really, really, really, really wanted a fucking drink.

❤️ If It Makes You Happy (Living In A House That Doesn't Slam Doors) by anderscones, RingDangDoo Mature | 8,8K

Unfortunately, Valentine’s Day doesn’t pan out for either Wade or Logan. They find that spending it together is better than spending it with the assholes they were meant to. Something hopeful flickers between them, but Wade will have to find an abundance of courage before they can even start to figure it out.

💛 Oh God, I think I'm fallin' by WonderWriter Teen and Up | 8,5K

Slowly Wade peels open his eyes, to find a large hand wrapped around the wrist of the Fucker. “Touch him again”, a voice says behind him, calm, deep, almost a growl, “And you die.” Wade falls in love, gets kidnapped and gets the guy. Exactly in this order. And then he even gets to keep him forever.

❤️ no strings to bind your hands by WhatIsAir Explicit | 5,9K

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Wade snaps, rounding the table to jab a finger into Logan’s chest. “Was I meant to pretend it’s perfectly fine that you’re running around regularly getting the shit beaten out of you for a few grand?” “You followed me!” “You came home last week covered in blood!” “You come back from work covered in blood every day!” In which Logan makes rent through cage fights, and Wade thinks his talents would be much better spent joining the X-men.

💛 Seeing You by RogueFroggo Teen and Up | 3K

Logan’s gaze trailed down Wade’s body, his usual web of scars now overlaid with angry bruises and deep cuts. Blood had seeped through the suit, staining his skin in streaks that made Logan’s stomach twist. “Fucking hell, Wade,” Logan breathed out, his eyes wide with a mixture of horror and disbelief. “It’s worse than it looks,” Wade said with a weak attempt at a grin, but even he winced, knowing how clearly untrue that was. “God Wade,” Logan exhaled sharply, “Why do you do this to yourself? I don’t fucking get it.” Wade looked away, his eyes refusing to meet Logan’s, shame etched into his face. Or; Wade is always throwing himself in danger as he doesn't care what happens to his body because he can heal anyway. But Logan doesn't like seeing Wade hurt and hates that Wade does that to himself.

❤️ life was good by rebslinger Not Rated | 2,3K

Nightmares were not exactly foreign to either of them with one of them being a 200+ year old vet and the other one being literally insane in the head with a tragic backstory. However, that didn’t mean that Wade was prepared to deal with Logan’s. aka Logan gets a nightmare and finally receives the comfort he deserves and they accidently confess their undying love for each other

💛 No Light, No Light by connorcosmics Teen and Up | 1,5K

"Sleeping wasn't hard for Wade. It rarely was a conscious decision, as the life of a merc wasn't the most forgiving. Passing out was the best way to go, especially when it involved a comfy bed and three to four warm blankets on top of him." or Wade has a nightmare and overheats, Logan gets worried and miscommunication ensues.

❤️ Night Vision by PurpleHippo666 Mature | 1K

Logan and Wade always have sex in the dark; Wade hates it because he thinks Logan doesn't want to see him. Logan loves it because he can see Wade best with the lights out.

If you have requests what trope/tag I should do next, feel free to drop them in my Inbox!

[dewdr0pz-alt]

goin' back to old yazoo 𝜗𝜚 ‧₊˚ ⊹

summary: headcanons about Vox with an old-fashioned reader (like Alastor)

warnings: Vox is a bit of a stalker, mentions of Valentino, one mention of slavery from Valentino (talking about the reader's time), reader is an overlord (not really a warning but just a heads-up), Vox being a little jealous

a/n: hello, readers (i need to think of a name for you guys lol)! i know this wasn't requested, but i played Bad Parenting recently and the intro song has been stuck in my head for days 😭

tags: (as always, just tagging a few people i think would be interested in this, please let me know if you would like to be on or off of the taglist!) @o-kye @zuuriell @strangleetomz@ax-y10 @stars-around-scars-collective@blu3-lemonad3@myheartticks@mochamuff1n@unbeleevable@danvstheworld @radio-to-trenchcoat-demons @average-vibe @back-totheoldhouse @prettysinners @lovevxle

(listen to this while reading if you want!)

When Vox first saw you at an overlord meeting, he was pissed. Was there another one like Alastor?

He took a little bit of a liking to you when you retorted back at him when he made a passive-aggressive comment about you.

^^ "How'd you even get here? You probably don't even own a cellphone or a car with your old-timey ass. I bet you don't even know what those are." "First of all, cars were invented in the 1920s, so I know of their existence. Second, just because I'm old-fashioned doesn't mean I'm stupid or incapable. Being a tech-savvy businessman doesn't make you smart; I'd say all that screen usage has fried what's left of your brain, Mr. Vox."

You two eventually became friends and even let him ramble about his technology (even though it took a little explaining)!

I think he'd realize at some point that you weren't as interested about technology as he was and would be fine with letting you talk about things from your era.

If you two started dating, at first he might try to make you dress in a more "modern" way to better suit his brand, but soon enough he'd just let you dress however you wanted (he would love it if you had a blue flapper dress 🤭)

He wouldn't try to explain security cameras to you (he wouldn't want you to know that he watches you whenever you leave the house), which he claims is "just to make sure you're safe"

I think Vox would eventually become a know-it-all about your era

^^ "So like...wasn't there slavery in the 20s, cariño?" "Actually (🤓☝️), Val, slavery was abolished in 1865." "I was asking Y/N, Voxxy." "I don't care. Get educated."

He would for sure dance with you to vinyl records of your favorite songs to give you a feel of nostalgia <3

[izzyy-stuff]

For your 300 follower bash, can I request a short story/drabble where the reader is either the sixth member of TXT or a member of a gg like maybe Le Sserafim or Aespa and is in a relationship with any member (I'm ot5 so it really doesn't matter who <3) I do kind of like the idea of Hyuka being the love interest and can totally picture the other members teasing him a lot, but again any member is fine <33

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 - 𝐇𝐔𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐊𝐀𝐈

bf!blond!Kai x fem!reader

in which no matter how much his friends tease him about his girlfriend, he knows they love her just as much as he does.

wc 1.4k

warnings kissing, slightly suggestive

↪ izzy speaks... first fic for the 300 bash!! I am happy it's with huening too! I've been meaning to use these pictures for a while now.

event post | event masterlist

The smile on your face slowly fades away as you watch the three dots disappear, leaving you on ‘seen’. You raise an eyebrow in confusion, but you don’t get a chance to pay it any more attention as your best friend, Yunjin, wraps her arm around your shoulders, smirking.  

“Look who’s being all lovey-dovey again,” she teases, giggling as she snatches your phone. “You guys are so adorable it makes me sick.” Kazuha and Chaewon share a laugh with her, shaking their heads at the brunette. “Hey! Give it back! I’m in the middle of a conversation!” You try to take your phone back, but it only leads to more of Yujin’s laughing. 

Little did  you know that your dear boyfriend Kai is in the same situation as you, hiding his face in embarrassment as Beomgyu holds his phone. 

“Can’t wait to see you again,” Beomgyu reads out loud, running around the room. Usually, he wouldn’t dare to do something like this. It was Kai’s privacy, and there was no way he would cross the line, but a dare was a dare. 

“Just read it all! Get it over with,” Kai whines, his cheeks red as he stares down at his lap, listening just like everyone else. “Oh, god. I’m not reading that. That’s for sure,” Beomgyu frowns, catching Yeonjun’s attention. The youngest’s eyes widen as he realizes what chats one of his best friends has just stumbled upon. “No, no, no, don’t look through that! This far is enough. Give it back,” the blond looks up again, his eyes full of fear and awkwardness. 

But before Beomgyu can do as he asked for, Yeonjun is already up, stealing the phone from him. “Yeonjun!” Kai yells, his mind too clouded with thoughts to use honorifics. “Oh my god!” The eldest gasps. “How can our fans call you an angel?” He dramatizes. “You’re nasty.” 

“Just kill me,” Huening sighs, closing his eyes. Taehyun chuckles, patting his back. “It’s not the end of the world,” he reminds the blond, rolling his eyes when he notices Yeonjun taking pictures of the chats on his phone. Sometimes, he doubted if Jun was actually the eldest of them all. “It might be, though! She is going to kill me if she finds out you’ve read our chats.” 

“I won’t tell a soul,” Yeonjun proclaims, still laughing as he hands Kai his phone back. “But I’m glad you don’t act like a complete angel, at least with your girlfriend. Honestly, the whole innocent act has been freaking me out.” 

“I’m not even going to say anything to that,” Kai answers, gripping his phone tightly as if he were scared someone might take it away from him again. “Now, answer your girl. You don’t leave a girl waiting when she asks to hang out.” Hyuka rolls his eyes at him, opening his phone again, “I’m not stupid. I know what to do and what not.” 

“Right,” Beomgyu is the first to scoff, but it doesn’t move Kai a bit. Once his girlfriend had his attention, nothing bothered him anymore. 

♡⸝⸝  

You watch Sakura, Yujin and Kazuha go over the choreography repeatedly, mentally going over the steps along with them. You definitely couldn’t say you would excel the dance yet, but you’ve had enough for today. If you went through the choreography again, your legs might as well give up. 

“Okay, we’re clocking out now! Have fun!” Eunchae grins, swinging her bag over her shoulder while Chaewon stands beside her wearing the same annoying smirk. You catch Yujin rolling her eyes and have to laugh. “I am going to leave in a bit, too,” you say, and your best friend immediately turns to you. “What? I thought we were grabbing dinner together after practice!” She complains. 

You open your mouth to answer her, but all that leaves your lips is a shaky breath full of regret. You squeeze your eyes shut as you remember the plans you made, clapping your hands together and muttering a quiet “sorry” through them. Yujin sighs when she notices your eyes. She can’t even blame you. Not when you seem so genuine with your apology. “I kind of…forgot about it,” you admit. “And made plans with Kai instead.” 

“Alright then. You’re lucky I know Kai has been busy, and you haven’t seen him much lately,” she shakes her head, and you smile again, jumping up to hug her. “Thank you, thank you!” Yujin smiles as she wraps her hands around you. “We can have dinner tomorrow. What do you think?” You ask hopefully, and she chuckles, nodding. “Go hang out with your boyfriend now,” she says, pushing you toward the door with a laugh. 

“I’ll see you tonight! Bye!” You quickly wave at Sakura and Kazuha before the door closes behind you, and you stand in the hallway, beaming as you notice your boyfriend sitting on the side, scrolling on his phone. “Hey,” you greet him quietly, making him raise his head immediately. “You should have come in. No one would mind.” Kai grabs his bag from the bench, slightly shaking his head as he walks to you. “It’s fine,” he assures you before gently pressing his lips on yours, one of his hands wrapping around your waist while the other rests on your cheek. “Hi, pretty,” he mumbles his greeting against your lips, making you bite your bottom lip to constrain your smile. 

Hyuka holds your hand as you walk through the HYBE building, telling you about his practice and some of the stupid dares they did during their break – purposefully not mentioning the one involving his friends reading your chats – while you tell him about your practice and the main points of your new choreography, bragging about how fun they are. 

He only lets go of your hand when you get to the entrance, smiling as he lets you walk outside first, watching you walk to your car while he waits for a few minutes, just like he did many times before in order not to get anyone suspicious about your relationship with him. People don’t need to know that you’re on your way to his dorm. 

♡⸝⸝  

You chuckle at the familiar voices as you step inside the dorm room. You feel at home. Not only because of your boyfriend, but also his friends, who’ve never been anything but welcoming to you. 

“Don’t mind then. Beomgyu and Soobin got immersed in League again,” Yeonjun simply waves at you as he passes the front door on his way to his room. “Taehyun just finished making dinner, or you know where the snacks are,” he smiles. “Thank you,” you smile back, taking off your shoes. 

It doesn’t take much longer for Hyuka to arrive, too, pulling you in for a hug as soon as he gets to you. You giggle, wrapping your arms around him and relaxing. “Have they been bothering you a lot?” Your boyfriend asks softly, and you swear you could get lost in his eyes when they lock with yours. You shake your head, grabbing his hand. “You know that’s not possible.” You’re right. No matter how much his friends tease him about you whenever they get the chance, they love you just as much as Kai does. He has to smile, remembering all the times they had told him how happy they were for him. 

“Right,” Kai mumbles quietly, his eyes on your hand holding his as you take him to his room. 

No matter how much time he spends with you, every moment and touch will always be as important to him as when you first got together. “Get a room!” Beomgyu yells, making Hyuka snap out of his thoughts. “Shut up!” He yells back at him, hiding his flushed cheeks as he follows you. 

You never need to do much with Kai to have fun. Honestly, you prefer not to do anything when you’re with him. Being able to relax after a long day with some lazy kisses and back rubs sometimes means so much more than having big plans. And today is no different. 

Kai tugs your hair behind your ear and pulls you in for a kiss as soon as he sits on his bed. You get comfortable on his lap, grinning into the kiss as you close your eyes. “You’re so pretty,” he mumbles against your lips. “I haven’t been in the shower yet. I’m all stinky,” you laugh, cupping his cheek. “Still beautiful,” he assures you, not wasting any time and pressing his lips on yours again, unable to get enough. “I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you whisper back with a smile.

⋆✶ izzy's tags @beomiracles @seoulzie @adel222 @inkigayocamman @flowzel @love-be0m @virgo-and-libra @hwanghyunjinismybae @liaatiny @minaateez ✶⋆ Want to get notified? Join taglist here !

[moghedien]

obviously there are a bunch of issues with the MCU and I'm not gonna sit here and try to convince everyone that MCU movies are cinema or whatever so don't get what I'm gonna say twisted. I do find their kinda mainstay in cultural media and the dominance they had to be interesting, especially now in an era where the MCU is undeniably falling off and struggling. just as like a cultural analysis I find that interesting and everyone has their opinions of why it happened.

my opinion/theory on why the MCU just crashed is because they sort of forgot what it means to be telling a comic book story, especially a marvel comic book story. Because I've read thousands of issues of various marvel series at this point, across tons of different eras and events, and the thing that makes them last (which is also a thing that drives me personally crazy and I hate so much) is that the status quo doesn't really change. Or when it does, it lasts for a few arcs or years at most and then gets reverted back to the norm eventually. Like the fact that everything is pointless and nothing is a risk is something I loathe, but it is admittedly what keeps them going. If someone just got into comics, they can pick up a modern issue and expect to find Spider-man or Captain America or whoever. They may be introduced to new characters, but the big ones will show up eventually.

And after the last Avengers movie, like half of the mainstay cast are just gone. Which as someone who likes good stories, I think is a good opportunity (which is arguably being wasted but idk I haven't watched any MCU thing in years) to actually shake things up and develop characters that mainstream people are less familiar with and give them a chance to shine and tell interesting stories. But that's not why people like marvel comics.

People like marvel comics because if they want to read about Iron Man, they can pick up any random issue about Iron Man and it will most likely be the Iron Man they know. People like the status quo, and Marvel has never been high literature and has always basically been pulp storytelling, and it gave people status quo and familiarity. And I think Marvel Studios figured this out waaayyy too late.

Because if Marvel actually understood what people like about the comics, they would have embraced recasting major roles from the start. They wouldn't have tied characters' identities so strongly to their actors and would have made it clear that characters can and will continue on with different faces. There is no reason why Tony Stark needs to be RDJ or Steve Rogers needs to be Chris Evans. They would have had plans to not write these characters out of existance the second actors wanted to exit or died or were fired or any of the various reason why actors are no longer involved with the MCU. Hell they had precedent. They didn't have a problem replacing Terrence Howard with Don Cheadle, who are very different looking people who give very different performances, but we know why they felt ok with that recasting but won't recast any of their boys named Chris...

Anyway it seems like they realized that general audiences don't actually like change if its permanent and are learning the wrong lessons with the Doom casting nonsense and the fact that they seem to keep changing what the new story is to fit what they think audiences want.

I'm fine with the MCU dying off and its probably better for media that it does, but again I'm just kinda interested in the fumble from like an objective standpoint because it seemed like they just locked themselves into eventual failure in such a stupid way. Like they could have told the same safe representative Avengers storylines for decades and wouldn't have a meltdown every time an actor in a major role needed to be removed from production if they just accepted that people would be recast as needed. It would be worse for actors and it would be worse for movies in general probably, but it would have kept the MCU churning out pulp like the comics do to this day. But now people are realizing its not just pulp but pulp they don't want and its gonna kill the MCU eventually.

[ghosty-zero]

Sonadow one shot number #13: Hot Pockets

{I kinda wanted to try a clueless Shadow this time, oblivious to the dating world}

Shadow was a confusing hedgehog to read. Like a stone wall he stood unmoving and unwavering. His eyes were always in a stern glare, like he was just naturally angry all the time. If you were an outsider looking in, you'd probably believe him to be just that, but Sonic had been through enough with Shadow to know he wasn't just a stone wall. He was actually very expressive. He had emotions and thoughts. Sonic could tell there was an entire life story behind those eyes.

What Sonic wanted to know, was what that life story was.

Getting Shadow to talk was a chore enough on its own. The only times he seemed to actually speak up were when Sonic did something stupid, or when he felt the need to correct someone on something. Even then it was pretty hard to get him to continue talking. He didn't like being pushed to talk, and he wasn't one for small talk either. Which meant that Sonic didn't have much material to work with, but he had nothing better to do this evening and he had been thinking about it all day.

So, determined as ever, Sonic cornered Rouge one Tuesday afternoon at a local diner. He had asked her to meet him there after his racing session. She came in a bit late, but she came.

"Hello dear, I hope I didn't keep you waiting." She said with a smile as she took a seat across from him.

Sonic sighed dramatically. "You took forever, what happened?"

She shrugged. "I was busy. Work stuff."

Sonic rolled his eyes. "Well, now that you're here, I wanna ask you something."

"Oh?" She asked. "What is it?"

Sonic shifted in his seat. "How long have you known Shadow?"

"A few years. We've worked together for a while, why? What's up?" She tilted her head curiously.

"I've just been wondering about him a lot lately." Sonic said with a sigh. "He's just so confusing and I wanna know more about him, but he's not exactly one for opening up to people."

"Hm," Rouge leaned back in her chair. "Well, what do you want to know?"

"Anything really. Like where he comes from, what he likes to do for fun, what his favorite color is..."

Rouge laughed softly. "His favorite color is red."

"Really?" Sonic raised an eyebrow. "I thought it would be black."

Rouge shrugged. "Everyone thinks that. His favorite color is actually red."

Sonic sighed again. "I wish he'd tell me things like that."

"To be honest, he's not a big fan of yours either." Rouge said with a small smirk.

"Yeah, yeah I know." Sonic pouted. "He's told me he hates me, and he's not one for lying. He doesn't have to tell me twice."

Rouge nodded. "Well, why do you want to know these things?"

"I told you, I wanna know more about him."

"Could this be stemming from a, oh, I don't know, a crush maybe?" She gave him a knowing look.

Sonic blushed. "No!" He exclaimed quickly, then lowered his voice. "It's nothing like that..."

"Mhm," Rouge hummed. "You seem very concerned with his tastes in colors and hobbies."

"I'm just curious, okay?" Sonic folded his arms.

"I don't believe you."

"When have I ever lied to you?" Sonic asked.

"I'll admit, you're not really one to lie. But I also know you're not one to admit your feelings either." Rouge smirked.

Sonic blushed harder. "W-what feelings? I don't have feelings."

Rouge laughed. "You tell me the truth, and I'll tell you what I know."

"Well..." Sonic started, but stopped himself.

Rouge smiled at him, waiting patiently for his answer.

"Fine... maybe I do have a tiny crush on him." He finally admitted. "But that's all it is. A tiny crush. Like, super itty bitty. Barely even noticeable."

Rouge chuckled. "Right. And my favorite color is orange."

"What? No way! I thought your favorite color was purple."

"Sonic, you're missing the point here."

"Oh. Yeah."

"Anyway, you like Shadow, and you want to know more about him because you want to get closer to him."

"Well, yeah." Sonic nodded. "I mean, we are kinda friends and all, but we don't really talk much. It's kinda hard to get close to someone when they don't give you anything to work with."

Rouge sighed. "I know what you mean. Shadow has always been difficult to understand." She paused for a moment, then grinned. "I could try talking to him for you."

"Really?" Sonic asked hopefully. "Would you do that for me?"

"Of course." She replied with a smile. "Anything to help out a friend in need."

"Thanks, Rouge!" Sonic said happily. "You're the...wait...what do you want in return?"

She shrugged innocently. "Oh, nothing much."

"Nothing much?" Sonic raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"Just your eternal gratitude and perhaps a little favor down the line." She said casually.

"Deal." Sonic replied without hesitation.

"Great!" She said cheerily. "I'll see what I can do. No promises though."

"Alright, thanks again Rouge."

When Rouge was assigned with a task, she was known to see it through till the very end. She set out right away to get more information on Shadow, but the first step was to actually find him. Which proved to be quite difficult, as he was a master at hiding when he didn't want to be found. They lived together in the same apartment, however he was like a rare creature. If you didn't see him at least once every few days, then you would probably never find him.

Rouge approached him casually one afternoon as he was making a bowl of black coffee beans.

"Hey, Shads." She said nonchalantly.

He grunted in acknowledgement, but did not respond.

"You know, there's this new movie that I've been wanting to see. It's supposed to be really good. You should go with me."

Shadow took a sip from his cup. "No."

"Aww, come on. We never hang out, hun."

"Your nicknames are unwanted and annoying." He responded coldly. "Do not use them."

"Okay, okay." She sighed. "But really, let's hang out sometime."

Shadow took another sip from his cup, then set it down on the counter. "I do not have time for such frivolous activities." He turned around and started heading towards his room.

"Ah, ah, remember that time I saved you from that angry mob?"

Shadow paused, then sighed. "Fine."

"Great!" Rouge clapped her hands together excitedly. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at seven. Be ready by then." She turned and walked off before he could argue.

Shadow just shook his head and continued on to his room.

The next day, Rouge was knocking on Shadows door, all dressed up and ready to go. When she received no answer, she knocked again. Still no response. She knocked harder, but there was still no sign of life behind the door. Finally, she gave up and opened it herself.

"Hey, Shads." She said loudly as she entered. "You ready to go yet?"

"I didn't say you could come in."

"I make the food in this house, I can do whatever I want." She said smugly. "Now hurry up and get ready. We're gonna be late."

Shadow stood up from his desk chair and turned around to face her. "I am ready."

"Well then, let's go!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room.

On their way to the theater, Rouge made sure to ask as many subtle questions as she could. However, she quickly realized that Shadow was not one for subtlety. He was very straightforward and blunt, which meant he answered her questions directly.

"So, Shadow." She started, trying to think of something to ask. "What do you like to do for fun?"

"I train." He said simply.

"Right, right. But I mean, like, when you're not training."

Shadow frowned slightly. "Why do you ask? Do you wish to spend time with me?"

Rouge chuckled. "Maybe."

"I suppose I enjoy reading." He replied after a moment of thought.

"Oh? What kinds of books?"

He shrugged. "Anything that catches my attention."

Rouge nodded. "Okay, I have another question. What kind of music do you listen to?"

"I do not listen to music."

"Really?" She raised an eyebrow.

"It distracts me."

"Fair enough. What about...food? What's your favorite food?"

Shadow sighed. "Why are you asking me these questions? I do not see the purpose."

"I'm just curious." She answered honestly. "We're friends, aren't we? We should get to know each other better."

Shadow glanced at her sideways. "Are we? Friends, I mean."

"Don't hurt my feelings." Rouge smiled playfully.

He rolled his eyes. "If you must know, I enjoy hot pockets."

Rouge blinked. "Really? I thought you would be more of a sushi guy."

"I like sushi too." He admitted. "But I also enjoy hot pockets."

Rouge nodded again. "Okay, one last question. What do you think of Sonic?"

"Sonic?" Shadow repeated, frowning slightly. "Why are you bringing him up?"

"No reason, really. Just curious."

"Hmph." Shadow grunted, but didn't press any further. "He is an annoyance."

Rouge chuckled. "I guess so. But like, is there anything you like specifically about him? Anything at all?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Very sure."

"I think he's pretty charming, don't you?"

Shadow glared at her. "Do you have a crush on him or something?"

Rouge laughed. "No, no, no. I just think he's a fun guy. And he's really good looking too."

Shadow scowled. "I don't understand how you can find such a thing attractive."

Rouge smirked, playfully nudging his arm with her elbow. "Aw, don't worry hun, I think you're plenty attractive."

Shadow huffed. "Wonderful."

Rouge reported her findings to Sonic the next day, who was extremely excited to learn what she had found out.

"So, let me get this straight." He said as she finished explaining everything. "You learned that he likes to read, he enjoys hot pockets and he thinks I'm an annoyance."

"Basically." She replied with a nod. "But it's a start."

"Not a great one, but it's something." He sighed. "Thanks for trying, Rouge."

"It wasn't a problem dear." She said with a smile. "I hope it helps."

"Is there anything I can do to get him to open up? Like, you know how sometimes people get drunk and tell you their life story? Is there anything like that I can do?"

Rouge chuckled. "Is that really the best idea?"

"I dunno." Sonic shrugged. "I just feel like I need to do something to make him like me more, and I'm not very good at the whole talking thing."

"Maybe you should try getting him drunk then." She suggested with a smirk. "That way, he'll tell you everything and you'll get closer to him."

Sonic laughed. "He'd kill me if he ever found out."

"Well, you could always just wait for him to open up on his own, but that could take a while."

Sonic sighed again. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He looked down at the floor for a moment, thinking. "Do you think he'll ever open up to me? Like, ever?"

Rouge gave him a sympathetic smile. "At the moment, he doesn't like you very much. But that doesn't mean you can give up. Give it time, he might warm up to you eventually. You never know."

Sonic smiled back. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks, Rouge. You've been a big help."

"Anytime, hun. Now go get 'em."

With that, she left and Sonic was alone again. He sat down on his couch and thought about what she had told him. If Shadow didn't like him now, then it would take a lot of effort to change his mind. But Sonic was determined, and when he wanted something, he went all out.

It took some time to come up with a plan, but when it finally came together, Sonic was confident that it would work. Sure, his plans usually didn't work out as expected, but this time was different. He had been thinking about this for a while, and he knew exactly what to do.

The plan was simple, but effective. He would corner Shadow and refuse to leave him alone until he agreed to spend some time with him. It sounded silly, but it worked on Tails all the time, so Sonic figured it would work on Shadow as well.

Unfortunately, finding Shadow turned out to be harder than he expected. The guy was incredibly good at hiding, and Sonic was beginning to think he had gone into hibernation or something. After a few hours of searching, Sonic finally found him in his usual spot in front of his apartment working on his motorcycle.

"Hey, Shadow." Sonic greeted casually.

Shadow grunted in response.

Sonic took a deep breath and prepared himself. "We need to talk."

Shadow stopped what he was doing and turned to face him. "About?"

Sonic crossed his arms and stared straight at him. "You. And me. Together."

"What?"

"Look, I know you don't like me, but we're friends, aren't we?"

"No." Shadow answered bluntly.

"Well, then maybe we can be more than just friends." Sonic suggested hopefully.

Shadow raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm saying, I want us to be closer." Sonic explained. "I want to get to know you better."

"I do not understand."

Sonic sighed. "Look, I like you, okay?"

"In what context?"

"I dunno." Sonic shrugged. "Just, romantically, I guess?"

"You guess you like me romantically?"

"Yes! No! Maybe?" Sonic ran his hands through his quills frustratedly. "I don't know. But I do know that I want to spend more time with you."

Shadow stared at him. "Why?"

"Because!" Sonic exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air. "I like you, and I want to get closer to you."

"But why?" Shadow repeated.

"Because I think you're cool."

Shadow quirked a brow. "Cool?"

"Yeah! I mean, you're strong and tough and mysterious. And I like that about you."

Shadow shook his head. "I do not understand."

Sonic groaned, grabbing Shadow's shoulders. "Listen to my words. I want to date you."

Shadow blinked, processing what he had said. After a moment, his expression softened slightly. "You wish to court me?" He asked quietly.

"Yes! Please!" Sonic nodded vigorously. "Let's go on a date."

"A date? Right now? Why?"

"Because I like you! That's why!"

Shadow sighed heavily, turning back to his work. "You are confusing."

"So, will you go on a date with me?" Sonic asked hopefully.

"No." Shadow replied simply.

Sonic frowned. "Why not?"

"Because I am busy." He gestured to his motorcycle.

"C'mon, you can finish that later. It won't take long." Sonic insisted. "I'll take you out to eat or something."

Shadow shook his head. "No."

"Please? Pretty please? With sugar on top?" Sonic begged, getting down on his knees.

"What does sugar have to do with anything?" Shadow questioned.

"Just say yes and I'll tell you." Sonic replied.

Shadow rolled his eyes. "Fine."

"Really? Are you serious? Yes! Thank you!" Sonic cheered happily, jumping up to hug Shadow.

Shadow pushed him away. "Do not touch me."

"Sorry, sorry." Sonic apologized, stepping back. "Anyway, let's go then. There's a great diner just a few blocks away that has amazing food, according to myself, it's super awesome, you'll love it, maybe, hopefully."

Shadow sighed. "Alright. Let us go then."

"Great! Let's go!"

The walk there wasn't long, but it was awkward. Neither of them said anything, and Shadow seemed to be lost in thought. Sonic wanted to ask what he was thinking about, but he figured it would be better to wait until after they ate.

When they arrived at the diner, Sonic lead the way inside and sat down at a booth. Shadow didn't try to sit next to him and instead chose to sit across from him. They both picked up their menus and began looking over them.

"So, um," Sonic started nervously. "Have you ever been here before?"

Shadow shook his head. "No."

"Well then, I'll recommend you something good." Sonic said with a smile. "Their burgers are great, according to Amy. I personally wish they had chili dogs on the menu, but whatever."

Shadow glanced over at him. "You like chili dogs?"

"Love 'em." Sonic replied excitedly. "They're my favorite food in the whole world. Well, second to pizza. And third to hot dogs, and fourth to hamburgers, and fifth to-"

"I get it." Shadow cut him off.

"It's better than hot pockets." Sonic joked.

Shadow blinked. "Who told you that?"

Sonic panicked, realizing he had accidentally revealed that he had talked to Rouge about Shadow.

"Oh, uh, no one." He lied. "I just heard you liked them."

"Hm." Shadow hummed, unconvinced. "Who else have you talked to about me?"

"No one, I swear! I don't...uh...talk to people. Ever. Except for you, obviously, but that's only because we're friends now!"

Shadow narrowed his eyes. "We are not friends."

"Well, I consider you to be." Sonic said 

defensively. "And I want us to get closer."

"Why?"

"Because I like you!" Sonic exclaimed. "I've already told you that! Don't make me repeat myself!"

"You speak so informally."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. So, how do you feel about chili dogs?"

Shadow shrugged. "I have never had one before."

Sonic gasped dramatically. "What?! You've never had a chili dog? What kind of life have you been living? Okay, we are getting you a chili dog right now."

Shadow didn't protest as Sonic went ahead and ordered them both a chili dog. When their food came, to say that Shadow was unimpressed was an understatement. He stared at the food in front of him like it had personally offended him.

Sonic tried his best not to laugh. "So, what do you think?"

"This is...different." Shadow answered after a moment.

Sonic grinned. "Go on, try it."

Shadow hesitantly took a bite, chewing slowly. After two seconds, he spit it out onto his plate.

"Wow." Sonic said, surprised. "It's that bad, huh?"

"That is the most disgusting and vile thing I have ever eaten."

Sonic laughed. "Guess chili dogs aren't your thing."

"No. They are not."

Sonic took a bite of his own chili dog. "Don't worry, this place has some pretty great burgers."

Shadow nodded. "Perhaps."

They sat there for a while, Sonic doing most of the talking while Shadow listened silently. When they were finished, Sonic paid for the meal and they left the diner.

"Thanks for coming with me, Shadow." Sonic said as they walked down the street together. "It means a lot to me."

Shadow didn't respond. He just kept walking.

"So," Sonic continued, not wanting to let the silence hang. "Got anything to talk about? Maybe some deep dark secrets?"

"No."

"Nothing? Nothing at all? Not even one tiny thing?"

"No."

"C'mon, you gotta have something."

Shadow sighed. "You have an apparent crush on me, hence the asking out on a date. I can only assume you spoke to Rouge in order to learn more about me."

Sonic cringed. "Is that bad?"

"Yes. And also no. It was actually quite flattering. I haven't been courted since-" He cut himself off abruptly, glancing away from Sonic. "It does not matter. My point is, I do not understand why you would like me."

Sonic tilted his head curiously. "I could list the reasons, but it's not exactly the best way to get closer to someone, right?"

"I suppose not." Shadow agreed. "I suppose I should try to open up more."

"It's a start." Sonic said with a smile.

Shadow paused for a moment. "I enjoy reading."

Sonic raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

"You wanted to know more about me, did you not?"

Sonic stared at him. "Are you serious?"

"Yes." Shadow answered simply. "I also like sushi."

Sonic laughed. "Okay, that's-"

"I cannot sleep on wrinkled sheets and I greatly enjoy hot pockets."

"Oh, wow, I-"

"My favorite scent is lavender and I hate being touched unless I have given explicit permission."

"Shadow-"

"My meals must be prepared as they were on the Ark, otherwise I will become agitated and leave the room."

"Shadow, please!" Sonic laughed, putting his hands on Shadows shoulders.

Shadow blinked, startled. "What?"

"Just...stop for a second, I can barely keep up." Sonic chuckled. "

"Is this not what you wanted?"

"Well, yeah, but not all at once." Sonic smiled. "Take your time, we'll get there eventually."

Shadow nodded. "Alright."

"Great!" Sonic placed his hands on his hips, his iconic smile on his face. "Now, how about we go for a run? You're pretty fast, right?"

"I am faster than you." Shadow stated confidently.

Sonic grinned. "We'll see about that. Last one to the beach is-"

Shadow teleported out of sight before Sonic could finish speaking.

"A cheater!" Sonic called out, already running after him.

Sonic lost the race, but he didn't mind. He got to see Shadow smile, which made up for it.