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xlovingcupcakex · 2 years ago

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M!Kylar x F!Reader - Gaming (Part 1)

You and Kylar meet through League. Two dorks in love. Fluff. I could make it into GN!Reader but I need the reader to be female for the next part, so yeah. There's not much League things, it's more like a plot device. So anyone can read it, even if you don't play league I made it pretty vague on purpose. As always, love y'all!

No trigger warnings, unless you count in League. Kylar is Kylar. Yeah.

2.1k Words. Not including headcanons.

As your game came to an end, the bold letters flashed on the screen. Although the game wasn’t won, you still had a lot of fun. Especially since your support was good, and it seemed like the both of you had a good synergy.

It was no surprise that you sent them a friend request and an invite to your next game, hoping to play some more with them. A feeling of joy rose up in your stomach as they accepted both invitations, their preferred lane positions already picked and ready. You were already ready to start the next game as well.

As you started up the queue, you asked them the basics, getting to know them better. If your synergy together was as good as you suspected, you definitely wanted to play more with them. And you for sure wanted to keep them around if that was the case! Making new friends in-game was fun, after all.

Music played on Spotify as your anonymous support was answering your questions. The answers were short and curt, giving your duo an aura of mystery around them. However, in the end you found out a few things about your lane partner.

First off, they were a man, and his name was Kylar. He was also around the same age as you, he even studies computer science! Although his answers were short, his questions about you were plentiful. You answered most of them without a second thought, as long as they weren’t questions about your exact location. However, you didn’t mind giving him a vague answer, like which major city you live close to.

You also made sure to cheer him up through the messages as best as you could when something didn’t work out on bot lane. His Nami was on point, he was actively using his ability to slow down the enemy, only to follow up with a bubble that would stun them, thus giving you a kill. But sometimes, things didn’t work out the way they were supposed to, all thanks to random visits from the enemy, which would catch both of you off guard.

But you made sure to calm him down each time, giving sweet words of encouragement, effectively bringing him back to his composed state almost immediately, or at least, it looked that way after you saw his playstyle improve. You also made sure to praise him each time he did something good. Although you weren’t sure if it had any impact on him because of the lack of voice chat, you still hoped you made his day, since he kept writing back “Thank you.” each time you gave him a compliment.

Unbeknownst to you, Kylar was a melting mess behind his computer screen after each time you have him a compliment. You were so nice and so easy to talk to! Not to mention, you were really good at the game. And you knew what to say to him to make him calm down. It’s like it was fate for both of you to meet!

Oh, how much fun does he have playing with you. He was actually the first one to ask you to play with him next day, too. Kylar spent the whole day being online as soon as he woke up, since he didn’t want to miss you and he really, really wanted to spend more time with you. He has made sure to give you lots of compliments as well that day.

Hiding behind the screen gave him the anonymity, hence making him more courageous. You appeared slightly later than usual, which made him worry as he started to overthink as to why you could be late by two hours compared to your usual time. So, it’s no wonder he went ahead and asked subtly, disguised under the pretext of asking how your day was.

Oh, so you had to do some grocery runs and buy a few things! Oh, it’s getting colder, and you bought some sweaters, as well! He was sure you looked so good in the virgin killer you bought. Kylar is so sure you bought it for a potential meeting with him, his Darling dressing up all nice and pretty just for him.

Although he didn’t know how you looked like yet, he was sure you were just the most beautiful Goddess on earth. It’s impossible for someone as kind and nurturing as you to not be beautiful to him!

He could only hope that you felt the same excitement whenever you spent time with him. You had to. Otherwise, why spend time with him? You surely had a thing for him too. You had to.

The more you played with Kylar the more attached you got. He was fun to text to and play with, and his mysterious nature made you more curious about him. You tried asking more questions over the last few weeks and lately, you’ve been curious about what he sounds like. At some point your head made up a deep voice, fitting for his mysterious personality.

It didn’t take long for you to take matters into your own hands, asking him whether not he wanted to join a Discord call with you. You were so ready to hear his voice. The thought actually made you all giddy and excited. As you exchanged Discord nicknames, you glanced at the screen. His nickname was Yamada-Kun, the same as his in-game nickname. He also had a picture of Yamada from ‘leveling up Yamada-Kun to lv999’.

Your heartbeat quickened up as you clicked the call button, ready to hear Kylar’s voice for the first time. Kylar answered instantly, which surprised you. You barely even heard the Discord call noise; you were instantly connected to a call with him.

Kylar shuffled about in his room, stumbling over his things. His hands felt shaky. His hands were sweating. He dried his hands by brushing them against his pants, hopefully less sweaty now. Kylar was so excited that he knocked over the microphone by mistake! Getting it took some time, since he had to be sneaky about it, but it was so worth it. Now his Darling can hear him in the highest possible quality! He was such a good boyfriend for you!

As the microphone fell, you shrank a little at the noise, curious as to what happened. “Hello?” you said. “Is everything okay, Kylar?”.

Your voice was so nice to him, so pretty and calming. It felt so good to hear you that he almost forgot about the microphone completely. He gingerly picked it up and placed it back on his desk. Then, he cleared his throat. “Y-Yeah, I’m good. My microphone just fell.”

Oh, he did not sound like you expected. Not in a bad way, of course! You didn’t expect him to sound so shy and nervous, that’s all. But it was so cute that you just had to tease him.

“Feels good to finally hear you, my Dear Duo! I was so excited. And I’m still excited for playing today. You ready?”

Although you couldn’t see it, Kylar was nodding his head repeatedly, black locks of hair flying around and messing up his hairstyle, making it more messy than usual. “Y-Yeah, that sounds absolutely great, my Lovely.”

Oh, he was using back pet names as well. He was so shy you thought he wouldn’t use it. You leaned back in your chair, pulling up League and logging it, then picking your preferred role to play before inviting Kylar to the game.

God, his voice was so nice to listen to, even with all the stuttering and occasional voice cracks when he complimented you on nice actions you did in-game. It was so soft and delicate. Your ears felt hot and you felt a flush come to your cheeks as you listened to his voice. You desperately wanted to hear more, so you gradually asked him more questions, which he seemed to answer gladly, happy to satisfy your curiosity.

The atmosphere on call was comfortable and it was nice to talk to someone during ranked games. Whenever he gave you a compliment or used a pet name, each time more confident than the other, you felt your stomach buzzing with energy.

You reflected the same energy back to him. You did have some kind of crush on him. But that’s because he seemed so curt and mysterious in the beginning, and now you found yourself falling for how cute and shy he was being on voice.

Your throat sometimes squeezed up, making it harder for you to say what you wanted. You didn’t even notice when you started to get nervous whenever you complimented him. Or used a pet name. You don’t remember when the last time was you felt so hot and giddy around someone else.

But you knew that the feeling, despite it being slightly uncomfortable, made you feel mostly good. Happy.

With how cold it was getting lately, your hands started to gradually become cold, to a point where you just couldn’t bear it anymore.

“I think I should lay down and heat up, Kylar. My hands are cold as fuck.” You said. You exited the game and started to slowly close up other tabs you might have had open.

“You could lay down a-and I’ll stream for you, Love! P-Please stay!” he sounded so desperate, it almost made you feel bad for wanting to go and lie down. A chuckle left your lips. He was so adorable. Like a bunny.

“Sure. I’ll call from my phone in a few minutes. Need to change into my night clothes. Be right back, Darling!” and so you ended the call. You got ready and as soon as you laid in the bed, Kylar instantly called you, almost as if knowing you are in bed already. Huh. He must have some crazy 6th sense.

You answered the call, getting comfortable under the covers. You already felt warmer, but not warm enough. Kylar pulled up some videos on YouTube as you guys chatted. Soon enough, he changed to Osu instead, showing you off his skill. Trying his best to impress you.

“Jesus, my hands still feel so cold. F-fuck, my whole body is cold.” you mindlessly complained, snuggling more into the comfort of your quilt and soft pillows, impatiently waiting for your body to generate enough warmth.

“I can be your blanket, Love!”

You almost choked on your salvia as your breath hitched, suddenly feeling shy as you mulled over his words. He wants to cuddle you. Or was it something else? You felt so light-headed you weren’t really sure. You hid your face in your covers.

“S-Sure. And I can be your pillow.”

This time it was Kylar’s turn to blush. He stopped whatever he was doing in Osu, his brain short circuiting. He destroyed his own streak on the current Osu map he was playing and because of the level difficulty you soon heard an old retro melody that would signal that the map has been failed.

His hands felt... Grabby. He desperately wanted to hug you. Feel you under his fingers. Give you the warmth you need. Slightly sweaty, too. He gulped.

“W-We should meet up, if you really want to c-cuddle, Love.... Can we meet? Please, Love. I want to meet with you so badly. Give me the address and I’ll come as fast as possible, no matter how far you are.”

His phone was already in the palm of his hand, looking up how far the busses and trains in his area would cost and how far they can take him. He was pretty serious about it.

You felt so embarrassed by your words. You gripped your pillow tighter, bringing it close to your chest. You were unsure on what to say as you contemplated your next words. You really wanted that hug.

“Okay, but... Only if you are somehow not that far away. Okay? You can come to (address)” you said. It wasn’t your home, but a place that was near enough. A gas station. A place where there are always people. It’s late and it would be the safest.

Kylar immediately looked up the place and noticed it’s 40 minutes away by buss. He started grinning, a red flush took over his cheeks, reaching his ears and neck. He gripped his phone tighter, already packing things he might need into his bag.

“G-Great. I’ll be there in an hour and a half! Jus-st wait for me, Love!” he ended the call, getting ready to meet up with you as fast as possible while you collected yourself and thought about what you have gotten yourself into.

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A few other things I've thought about while writing this one.

Some Kylar headcanons ahead!

They are probably into Otome dating games.

In games like Osu! or Killing Floor, they are a casual player.

More competitive games make them aggressive, although they don’t show it on chat if there’s a penalty.

They do, however, make noises/sounds of frustration, maybe slamming their hand against the desk or keyboard, but never anything full-on destructive.

Of course, Kylar will hold those reactions back when playing with you!

To be honest, you have a calming effect on them.

I feel like Kylar would be a Nami main when it comes to support, alternatively other cute champs like Lulu, Soraka, Lux. But enjoys an occasional Pyke or Senna.

You bet they play anime songs/openings, Hatsune Miku or other Japanese music while beating the maps on Osu!

If they are not playing anime songs/openings, they sure as fuck play emo/scene music. Pierce The Veil, Breaking Benjamin, Asking Alexandra. Sounds about right to me. Oh yeah, also listens to Night Core.

I feel like at first, they would be court and short when it comes to messages. Mostly because they are shy and so they would seem cold at first. And yeah, you can’t hear their stuttering.

But writing stutters and such also suits them lmao. I think they would use a lot of (…) whenever they write something.

I am sure they would be voiceless at first because they would need to steal a microphone/headphones with microphone first, just so they can talk to you.

#loving's writing #dol kylar #kylar the loner #degrees of lewdity kylar #kylar degrees of lewdity #kylar x reader #male kylar #dol kylar x reader #kylar dol #dol x reader #dol #degrees of lewdity x reader #degrees of lewdity

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sourw0lfs · 1 year ago

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dance with the devil - part six

I've decided this will eventually be available on AO3, but I want to get through some major plots points for everyone following along here before I have to spoil them with AO3's tagging system.

Words: 525 | Rating: E (mostly parts 1 & 2, but also future parts) | CW: dead bodies, Eddie is having a bad time

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six || part seven || part eight || part nine || part ten || part eleven || part twelve

Once the front door of the apartment closes, Eddie spends the first few minutes by himself just staring at it. He isn't sure exactly what he expected when Joyce gave him this assignment, but he's pretty sure what he got isn't even near the list. Having to help cover up a murder definitely isn't on the list. And now that he's done that, Eddie isn't even sure that's what he was supposed to do. The only instructions Joyce gave him before sending him on his way was take care of Steve Harrington. No details, no helpful hint or clues. Nothing but the world's vaguest instruction and a stern warning not to fuck it up.

Eddie's eyes wander to the body still in the middle of the floor and he grimaces slightly. "Guess it's just you and me, buddy," he tells the man as he pulls the fourth angelic miracle of the hour to cover up the murder even further. A pool of ochre colored vomit appears next to the body. Hopefully it's enough to throw off any suspicion of foul play, because it's all Eddie's got left. He's only even had the ability to do things like that for a handful of hours at this point. He probably shouldn't be testing their limit. Or cleaning blood off people with them, but what else was he supposed to do? He can't help a guy that gets slapped with a murder charge five minutes into his assignment.

Sighing and taking one last look around the apartment for anything he missed, Eddie finally lets himself go after Steve. There's a chance it's been long enough for him to have the breakdown he was clearly teetering on the edge of. Or maybe he's actually fine and Eddie's just assisted a psychopath or something. That'll look great on his soul's record. All it takes is a blink for him to find out.

And yeah, maybe he should stop with the magic for now, considering the dangerous wobble to his landing once he let's it guide him back to his charge. And maybe he should have made sure Steve was alone before teleporting to him, because a shrill, frantic female voice is the last thing he needs when his head is already kind of spinning. "Holy shit! Where did you come from?"

Blinking hard to clear his vision, Eddie looks in the direction of the voice. He sees Steve first, looking just as frazzled as he had when he’d stormed out before, but now there’s a girl, too. “You want the long answer or the short answer?” he asks, lips already spreading into a grin to hide his discomfort. “Because short is some guy’s apartment and long is, well, a long story.”

The girl looks at Eddie for a moment longer before glancing at Steve, seeming to have a full conversation with him with just their eyes, before they move back to Eddie again. “Long,” she replies with a smirk of her own. “And it better include how the hell you just popped up in my apartment out of nowhere.”

Grimacing, Eddie takes a deep breath and launches into his story.

Did a quick little Google about why some people might not be showing up, so if you're down below and your tag didn't work, check to see if your blog is searchable in your settings! If it's not, I can't tag you.

If you want added to the list, let me know!

tags: @chaosgremlinmunson @soaringornithopter @hbyrde36 @shares-a-vest @dreamwatch @quevadilla @tboyeddie @penny00dreadful @momotonescreaming @stevesbipanic @dawners @steddiejudas @just-my-latest-hyperfixation @estrellami-1 @vthx @lolawonsstuff @gleek4twd @littlebluejane @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lawrencebshaggoth @sadisticaltarts @queenie-ofthe-void @r0binscript @anaibis @hairdressersdoitwithstyle

#fox writes things #steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve x eddie #steddie brainrot

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mybrainismelted · 1 month ago

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Shameless DVD Commentary - Battlefield Chicago

@callivich was nice enough to suggest that I do one of these, so let's give this a try.

Which fanfic is your DVD commentary about?

Battlefield Chicago - a Dystopian Future AU set in the Omegaverse. Alpha Ian has been declared as an undesirable, and needs a purpose. When his best friend Mandy asks him to help her search for her missing brother, he will uncover a whole world he never expected to find.

Give us some stats - (when you wrote it, word count, how long it took to finish, is it a one-shot/multi-chapter, etc)

Battlefield Chicago is my longest fic, coming in at 137, 247 words. Insane, since when I first came up with the idea I expected 20K max. I started writing it in September of 2024, posted the first five-ish chapters in October 2024, and posted the 43rd and final chapter exactly one year later (which I didn't realize until later!). If the story is written from a character’s POV, why did you choose this character?

This one alternates POV's. Early in the story we see what happened in each of their lives to bring them to the critical point of them finally coming together, and then it varies sometimes even within a chapter as they live out the rest of the story together. What was your favourite scene to write? The first major battle scene was a good one, but I think Terry's death might have been my favourite Are there any little moments or references you hope readers will notice? So many in this one. There are a lot of little hints early on that will answer some of the questions that come up during the story, and it's always my hope that either on initial read, or maybe on a re-read, people will see those and have that moment of something that clicks. "Where are they?" is one of the biggest examples of that. Was there anything you struggled to write? If so, how did you overcome this? Honestly, the last few chapters as a whole. Sorry for soap-boxing here, but... the engagement had dropped off so badly that it was getting hard to see the point in continuing. And I think those last few chapters probably suffered a bit as a result. I overcame it simply because I refused to leave it unfinished. I needed to tell this story, and even if only one person was still reading, I felt like they deserved to know how it ended. Also I had written the epilogue months before, so I had something to drive towards. Did the storyline change in any way as you wrote the story?

It did, actually - there were a few pieces that I only had somewhat vague plans for, and some reader speculation in comments completely changed the direction for how those pieces ended up falling in the end.

If you are writing a particular trope or genre, was it your first time writing this? Yeah, this was my first Omegaverse fic, and my first Dystopian AU. Combining them into one big story was probably a bit insane, right?

What are you most proud about in the story? (plot, characterisation, dialogue, twist/cliffhanger, etc) The world building, I think. That and the fact that I completely pantsed this one - 137K of intricate details that I had ZERO outline written down for!! But I think all in all I did pretty good job with this one of building out the background, current day, and potential of the world this story lives in. Are there any ‘easter eggs’ in your story - e.g. references to other stories you’ve written, a trope you often use etc? Absolutely. There are massive muffins. And... IFYKYK. If you’ve chosen your most popular story, are you surprised by the popularity? To date, yeah, this one is my most popular by all metrics. I'm not surprised, really - it is my longest and most involved work, and it started posting before the recent downturn in engagement. Nowhere near the stats of the better-known writers of course, and the combination of tropes is probably going to turn off a lot of readers, but this one has done well for itself all things considered.

Were you nervous or excited to post this story? So, so nervous. I'd published a few other small things before this one, but they were mostly fluffy and sappy stuff. I had no idea when I started if I had the ability to pull this one off, or if anyone would be interested in reading it! Anything else you’d like the readers to know about the story?

Battlefield Chicago is best read as a historian's account of events. The start is assembled from their research and other second or third-hand accounts of what happened. Later, you can see where they tracked down the main characters and started getting their direct tellings of the story. Also... I completely lost track of one of my OC's in this one for a few chapters (drawbacks of no outline!). I think I recovered pretty well though and nobody has noticed so far!

@shamelessdvdcommentary

#shameless dvd commentary #my long fics

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flying-fangirls · 8 months ago

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Arthur's Story

Okay so now that Part 46 is out and we got that moment of John explaining what Arthur's train story meant to him, I kinda want to talk about this particular allusion myself. Arthur's retelling is mostly pretty close to the original, but I am going to get into interpretation/implementation stuff. So if you want to read the original story for full context, it's "Solitude" by Ben Ames Williams!

To start bluntly: I do not like the Lilly comparison /nm

I'm not saying it's wrong per se, but I do believe it's a fairly weak conclusion that misses out on a lot of other compelling potential.

Let's back up.

Where It Falls Short

Alright, so if you go and read it, you'll quickly see that the original short story, "Solitude," is ridiculously well-aligned with the tone and mood of Malevolent. There are ideas of cosmic insignificance, perseverance and despair, questioning morality and "goodness," and helping others in dark times. (it does have some of the weird hallmarks of early 1900s white dude writing, but otherwise I actually quite like this story! it's got nice vibes and pretty words)

Now, an allusion is a reference within a story to an outside piece of information, and its entire purpose is to add new depth. A good allusion considers the full context of whatever it's referencing, and uses that context to its advantage. It challenges the audience to work through that outside context and uncover some new perspective(s) on characters, themes, and/or plot— something they otherwise had not seen or considered before.

The thing is, when Part 46 applies the "Solitude" allusion to Lilly specifically, there's nothing new gained whatsoever. What does John tell us during this moment?

Lilly took care of him, showed him his first glimpse of humanity, and gave him a name— all good stuff! But also all old stuff, these details have all been said in the show before, some more than once. Since we know that the main point of an allusion is to bring something new to the table, then this implementation fails on that point because all it's done is simply rehash previously established perspectives on Lilly.

Not only does this take on the allusion fall short, the show's interpretation also limits our ability to understand it. This isn't a moment where the podcast shows us new information and lets us draw our own conclusions. This is a moment where John stands in for the podcast's voice, and he tells us what it considers the "right" interpretation. Even if we had formed our own interpretation about this allusion, the show has now essentially told us that those interpretations are "wrong" (which isn't an antagonistic move on the show's part, by the way! just the message it's unconsciously implying)

I agree that John's connection between the story and his experience with Lilly in Part 46 is a genuinely sweet moment! But unfortunately, because it neglects to take a new path, it's also a predictable moment that loses its strength among all the other sweet Lilly moments. And that takes away any chance for the allusion to impact the audience in a unique way, wasting its full potential.

Where It Misses Out

(now here comes the English major moment when I tell you why I'm right and you're not /j)

Alright, again, the Lilly comparison isn't wrong. I think it's totally legitimate to see this story about a woman helping an injured and lonely man, and think of Lilly! But personally, when I heard Arthur's retelling, I never once considered Lilly until the show told me to (12 episodes later). When I listened to Part 29 and the first half of the story, I admittedly was totally lost and dug through those lines over and over to find a meaning. And the only real interpretation that naturally came to me was a parallel to Arthur and John's journey. A man lost in a terrifying world, at the whims of forces much stronger than him, who has lost all of his loved ones to death or abandonment? Yeah, that's literally just Arthur and John.

And the conclusion in Part 39 only seemed to support that interpretation more— Moll abandons her entire life to follow Mat into the cold and dark, John and Arthur both (literally and figuratively) throw their lives away to help the other through the dark. We can even swap who's who here— either Arthur or John could be Mat struggling to survive as a "good" person, and either one could be Moll extending a hand to that person.

There's also a particular line that John says in Part 46 that feels completely out of place with the interpretation the show tells us:

He implies that Lilly did the same as Moll and shut out everything around them. But when Lilly takes care of John in the hospital, his development there isn't that she "drove out the world." Lilly brought the world closer to John, not further away— she helped him expand his focus outward, not close it off.

However, this line does fit extremely well with John and Arthur's dynamic! How often have we heard about these two's edges blurring, about their minds and emotions and internal selves blending together? How many times have these two expressed a love so codependent that it rejects everything outside of themselves? Heck, John's major emotional plot in s4 revolved around the desire to shut out the outside world and isolate himself together with Arthur.

Just like how Moll's arrival drove out the world for Mat, the arrival of John into Arthur's life certainly drove out the rest of the world, pulling him away from his job, home, and friends. Likewise, the arrival of Arthur into John's life most definitely drove out the rest of the world, removing him from the legacy of the King and literal world of the Dreamlands.

The podcast tries to push its Lilly interpretation into a mold that it simply does not fit. And in doing so, it completely misses the perfect connection between Moll/Mat and John/Arthur that already exists. "Solitude" offers a naturally perfect bridge between its story and Malevolent's, but Part 46 steers us away from that bridge and straight into the river where we're left without any strong understanding or impact.

Where It Could Go

Not only does a Jarthur interpretation of Arthur's story connect the allusion to the podcast well, it also gives us a new perspective to think about Jarthur with (again, the most important part of a good allusion).

Earlier I said that Arthur's retelling of "Solitude" mostly followed the story, and that's because he leaves out one key detail: Moll had spent most of her life trapped as the victim of abusive men who forced her to neglect herself and care for people who didn't care for her back. (Admittedly, I think it's weird the show ignored this specific detail, but most allusions do intentionally require outside work on the audience's part, so for now I'll hesitantly just say that was Guthrie's aim.)

If we consider this backstory in our interpretation, we can find a really fascinating view of Jarthur's dynamic. Both Arthur and John could be Mat: a man who has seriously harmed others before and is now left broken and lost in a dangerous world. Then we can have John as Moll: trapped by the King and the Dark World and Arthur's body, powerless to take control of his own self, forced to neglect his identity/values for others' wants. And we can have Arthur as Moll: stuck in relationships/lifestyles that restrict him, autonomy stolen by social expectations and eldritch beings with far more power than him. Both of them as Moll: escaping a past of abuse, but nevertheless still finding yourself in a position of supporting men at the cost of your individuality.

A Jarthur interpretation frames Arthur and John's pasts in a concept of abuse and neglect, which is not usually (if at all) how the podcast presents their backstories. It also forces us to reconsider the full scope of their dynamic with each other. Normally the show presents Jarthur as a messy, yet overwhelmingly restorative and supportive relationship. However, when we place Jarthur into the context of Moll, we are forced to stop and acknowledge how their dynamic still harms them both: They're codependent to a self-destructive degree, protective enough to harm anyone else who gets close, so closely connected that they lose a part of who they are for the other's sake. Neither one of them exist as a wholly independent individual anymore, both of them losing pieces of their minds, emotions, and bodies to accommodate for the other's needs.

While s4-5 John and Arthur are clearly at a point in their relationship where they openly express their love and gratitude to the other for "saving" them, this allusion presents us with a perspective on their situation without the rose-colored glasses. We have the opportunity to recontextualize their dynamic and remember just how much Arthur and John have lost for the sake of each other, no matter how loving and compassionate that sacrifice might be in their eyes.

Where I Conclude the Ramble

From the moment Arthur first told this story in Part 29, its ambiguous inclusion captivated my little overthinking brain. It was incredibly fascinating to mull over Arthur's words and John's reaction, and then to dig deeper into this obscure story outside of the podcast and uncover answers!

Which is why I think I'm so disappointed with the final answer that Part 46 told us. If anyone else has looked into "Solitude" outside of the podcast before, they likely saw the same well of potential depth to work with that Harlan Guthrie clearly also found. Yet, for some reason, the podcast offers a conclusion that barely scrapes the surface of that well.

Instead of giving us new depth to the story, a Lilly interpretation really just brings up more questions for us. Did Lilly neglect herself in some way when she took care of John? Was Lilly the victim of abuse at some point in her past? What parts of Lilly's past led her to this point? There's so much more information that we need for this layered allusion to make sense, but we never get that information, so all we're left with is a weak conclusion and wasted potential.

On the other hand, a Jarthur interpretation does answer questions for us, and it adds depth to our previous understandings of their dynamic. We better understand how John and Arthur's bad decisions lead them to their darkest moments, how lost and afraid they both felt at the start of the podcast, how they found relief and protection in the other. And we consider new possibilities of how John and Arthur's past circumstances abused them, how they were trapped in cycles that stole their autonomy, how they still cannot escape these cycles and keep throwing their lives away for others.

Part 46 told us a single interpretation to have for the train story, but there is no reason we can not (nor should not) look for other interpretations— especially when the story itself shows us evidence that points to a different answer.

(final disclaimer: I absolutely do not intend any of this as any sort of attack! this is just general literary critique to try and explain why I'm a little annoyed at a single line lol)

#going back to my less sappy literary critique #again i cannot stress enough that hg's interpretation isn't wrong #i just don't particularly like it and think there's a more... impactful. interpretation out there /nm #also: go read solitude pleaseee it's so malevolent-coded i promise you'll love it (hopefully)#malevolent #malevolent podcast #malevolent meta #malevolent analysis #cherrys rambles

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dusty-siltstrider · 9 months ago

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Alright I'm gonna ruffle some feathers I think but idk I gotta say something.

For this moment and this moment only I'm going to set aside the rabid Viktor fan that I am and speak as a slightly less rabid Vi fan. She's a very close second and I relate to her the most out of the cast. Love her. So on and so forth. At this point the marketing is frustrating me less as a Viktor fan and more as a Vi fan.

When the Annecy people talked about a goth Vi fighting in the pits piss-drunk mad seeing crazy things I was ECSTATIC. Like holy shit that's such a major turn in her personality! Really fills out that whole "what does Vi do when she has no one left to protect" thing! Wow! Not to mention she's gonna be hot but that's a given. What a shocking thing to see when November comes around aaaand there she is in the trailer okay. Along with what is presumably her act 3 timeskip design judging by the longer hair. Element of surprise gone. Cool.

So where the Viktor part of me gets to waste hours yapping about where he's gonna be in season 2, what his arc will be, what he's gonna look like, what's gonna cause divorce era... feel like we're running out of room for speculation for the main 3. Room for imagination, if you will.

Like WE'VE BEEN KNEW ABOUT PIT FIGHTER VI. This isn't a surprise sneak peek anymore, everyone's either seen her in the trailer or at least heard about the Annecy stuff. Personally I no longer have the same level of insane jittery excitement to see how that arc goes in s2 anymore. Her new design is no longer a surprise and they're going to show even more tomorrow lol. I have little room to ponder "huh wonder what VI's gonna be up to." Pit fighter arc gets started and instead of my jaw dropping going "oh my god Vi honey you really are broken aren't you noooo" it's just... yeah that thing I saw during a Netflix event. Damn. Looks cool still but it's not a shock.

This massive point in both the plot and Vi's arc has become a marketing hype machine. Which dampens, you know, the whole "telling a story" thing.

What do I have to speculate about? Cait's whole iron-fist arc is fairly obvious via marketing, Vi's three-act structure has been pretty clearly laid out, they even spoiled Noxus/Ambessa turning on Piltover. Yeah, think we saw it coming, sure, but I kind of like being able to speculate on stories I enjoy. At least Jinx's revolutionary thing is pretty up in the air (which I still believe is a misdirect but I digress).

Please don't get me wrong, I really like her design and I'm still very excited to see where it goes! Obviously there's still plenty of details in between to fill out and yes I'm being slightly dramatic and yes my salt towards yet again no Viktor may be contributing to this frustration and YES pit fighter Vi is sick and the clip will be cool as fuck no matter what. But I'm honestly a little surprised everyone's so thrilled about this. I'm (likely) not watching it solely to preserve at least some element of surprise because I'm so excited for Vi next season and it sucks that they're just giving this all out in marketing.

Assuming this is the Annecy clip, that's just kinda lazy to reuse btw. But whatever this is lengthy and poorly worded enough.

Anyway bringing back the Viktor fan that I am yes I'm bitter yes I miss him yes I will not stop insisting that throwing in a few voice lines is not only perfectly reasonable as a teaser but would be more effective marketing wise than burning out the Cait/Vi/Jinx stuff bc deadass what else can they show us at this point okay thank you goodnight

#anyway... that is my presentation #if I'm proven wrong tomorrow you can idk call me a dingus or something #vi honey you're becoming marketable I don't like it #arcane #arcane season 2 #arcane vi #rambles #yeah I'm prob still gonna watch it wanna fight about it

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blushblushbear · 6 months ago

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BEAR'S EPIC BLOGGING

so I already feel bad for the anon who asked my opinionated musical theater ass to look into Epic.

Gonna attempt to keep my thoughts succinct and all on the same thread/under read more--

but with that said if you wanna avoid this all together, which is very fair, I'm gonna be tagging this as bear's epic blogging

with that all said DOWN INTO THE CUT WE GO

So right off the bat I will say the musical IMMEDIATELY looses points cause the majority of the songs are 3-4 minutes long

I'm very much of the mind set that all big feelings and plot points SHOULD have a song, but the issue with a lot of modern musicals is that they think all songs need to be 'song' length (so about 3 to 4 minutes long)

they're wrong and I think my favorite example of how to do 'give a feeling a song but don't let it over stay it's welcome' is I guess this is Goodbye from Into The Woods (side note if you saw disney's movie of this musical, I'm so sorry, that was insulting, go watch that PBS recording with Bernadette Peters, she's amazing)-- it's about fairy tale characters, this is Jack of Jack and the Bean stock fame and this is the moment he's saying goodbye to his beloved cow in exchange for magic beans. This is a big moment for Jack and is the driving force for his actions for the first half of his story so it's important, and since it's an important beat in a musical, we sing! -- for about 30 odd seconds and then we continue with the plot cause we have A LOT of story to get through.

And on the note of A Lot of story to get through---

SO-- I'm a broke bitch, so how I experience musicals is I read through the plot summary on wiki, and as songs come up, I listen to the song.

This approach is especially apt here since there is no stage production and low key THANK GOD cause this opening number is actually pretty bad as opening numbers go.

But put a pin in that cause we'll come back to it, NOW--!

I actually gave the wiki a dry read before putting music into anything cause--- well, admittedly it's partly curious but also low key uh--- so I'm not as Hot on The Odyssey as everyone else seems to be? It's a story about a captain who gets mad lost, and losses most of his men, and cheats on his wife, and yeah I GUESS it's an epic tale of his journey home or whatever but like----

I feel like it puts a damper on things when you take some details into account--- like how it's mostly just HIS journey, fuck all the dudes he brought with him I guess. This ain't about them meme. Also 'Her white arms round him pressed as though forever' does loose some cache for me when I know cha boy like---- full on cheated on his wife on the way there. He never gave up coming home! Buuut he did take a break to get laid and loose a lot of his men on the way.

I know it's like-- cunning and he out smarts the odds and blah blah blah but like-- he's still an asshole ya know??

So I was curious how they were gonna spin this, so I read the wiki. I still have not finished the wiki cause HOLY SHIT this thing is long. I know it's supposed to be An Epic but like--- I feel like things could've been stream lined SOME. ESPECIALLY when the songs are 4 minutes a piece BRUH.

I'm going to try and have an open mind here but the odds are already against this thing from word go.

BUT OKAY, the opening number.

I know it's not a stage production but like---------

If you're gonna call something A Musical, on some level you have to treat it like one.

A lot of musicals lately seem to want to REMOVE the theater aspect of musical theater (god forbid we have some incidental music or like------ A THEME or anything)

At the start of this I'm already missing the sort of Establishing Song that's in a lot of my favorite musicals.

Or I guess I should say like--- the establishing melody or stanza or something. Not all of them are full numbers but they help set the stage (sometimes literally, fucking the way the Beetlejuice musical has all it's pieces like light up or roll in and just like the scene fades in MWAH glorious I DROOL)

But yeah, Prologue: Invisible from Beetlejuice, Overture from The Producers (which I only just realized has a bit of Prisoners of Love in the full version WHICH IS THE SECOND TO LAST SONG they really said MEDLEY! with their whole chest lol), Little Shop of Horrors from Seussical the Musi--- JUST KIDDING IT'S FROM LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, No One Mourns the Wicked from Wicked, The Ballad of Sweeney Todd from Sweeney Todd (2012 London cast my beloved), Seasons of Love from RENT, Alexander Hamilton from Hamilton (which say what you want about Miranda but DAMN this musical is so efficient and well crafted ARGUE WITH THE FUCKING WALL) HELL, EVEN HOLD ME, BATBOY FROM BAT BOY THE MUSICAL

Ever single one of these starts with a song or a bit of music that sort of Vibe Checks the audience into the world we're gonna be living in for the next 2 to 3 hours and if they don't also act as a whole on establishing number (aka a Welcome To This World song or Here's The Start of The Plot song) then it's the very next number in the show and usually follows IMMEDIATELY after

(Opening Night from the Producers, Rent from RENT, The Whole Being Dead Thing from Beetlejuice, Aaron Burr, Sir from Hamilton, No Place like London from Sweeney Todd, AND Downtown/Skid Row from The Little Shop of Horrors MY BELOVED, HAZBIN HOTEL FUCKING WISHES SHE COULD BE YOU SO BAD, MY BEAUTIFUL FLAWLESS, DARLING!!! {okay but seriously Happy Day in Hell wanted to be Skid Row so fucking bad but she tripped over the starting line and broke her neck, deadass. Though to be fair Hazbin sweetie, you never stood a chance, Skid Row does SUCH an AMAZING job introducing it's world, establishing it's characters and their wants and feelings, No One can beat it. THAT FUCKING PART WHERE THE BUMS ARE CLIMBING THE DAMN FENCE LIKE FUCKING ZOMBIES you live in my head rent free! You and the lady who starts the song-- DAMN! Sing it child INDEED.})

But yeah, back to Epic.

I'm not going to hold the fact that it doesn't sound like Full Musical Theater deal against it since it's basically a handful of people headed mostly by One Guy (there is no pit, there is no orchestra, it's not a whole ensemble of singers), but I WILL hold the fact that it basically doesn't have an establishing number at all at it's start against it.

No Vibe check, no settling in, just BAM! In medias res! Hey dude, I know you're in a war right now, but you gotta kill this baby dude, trust.

It really did just smack me in the face with it's plot. (full palm)

AND THE FACT THAT THIS IS GREEK MYTH LIKE-------

HELLO??????? GREEK CHORUS??????? WHERE ARE YOU GREEK CHORUS??????? GODS AND OR MUSES???? OUTSIDE OBSERVER TO TELL THE STORY THAT COULD'VE GIVEN US A PROPER ESTABLISHING NUMBER???????? THAT CONCEPT IS /LITERALLY/ FROM GREEK MYTH?!?! ESPECIALLY SINCE THE GODS ARE APPARENTLY ALREADY HUDDLED AROUND WATCHING ANYWAY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

like.......................................

Like I said at the top of things I literally feel so bad for that anon. They probably did not know I am Mad Opinionated About Musical Theater but I am. And they did not know the land mine they stepped on by low key suggesting me to give it a listen.

Unfortunately I am Anton Ego here. I don't LIKE musical theater-- I LOVE IT.

THIS ALL BEING SAID---

I will say I think a saving grace for me during this is that Jorge Rivera-Herrans has a pretty solid singing voice.

It's very modern musical pretty boy which I'm not the hugest fan of by I can def see why people want to draw a face to match it and/or apply it to their blorbos and ocs.

This ride is already starting out bumpy for me, but my butt's probably just sensitive, so take my bitching with a grain of salt.

Also know that just cause I'm complaining doesn't mean I hate it. I complain about Blush Blush all the time in the discord and I basically spend most of my free time doing shit on here so--

Alright, I'm gonna get through a few more songs before I tune back into yap some more

I'd say stay posted, but like--- maybe don't I'm always a complainer when it comes to modern musical theater <XD;

#bear's epic blogging #also regardless of it's a good or bad musical Fuyu would probably love it #Fuyu would love two kinds of musicals #REALLY GOOD #and GOD AWFUL #camp QUEEN #WELP #*cracks knuckles*#GUESS IT'S TIME TO TALK MUSICAL THEATER

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worddevourer · 4 months ago

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Well, I finished Locked Tomb 1. In point of fact I resumed right after the first trial completion, and then finished the whole book in a straight shot, which took until 5 AM, because there's really not a great place to step off.

And like... I don't think I've seen another book with so many bleeding holes where a sequel needs to go.

Knowing what's technically inside the Tomb only raises more questions, and it still feels like there's a big hole in why the 9th exists. Literally like the second page of the glossary notes that most planets are thalergenic, because can be extracted for thanergy, but are almost never thanergenic, meaning they produce death energy on a stable basis. And boy, doesn't the 9th feel like a planet that is constantly dying. But as to how that interacts with the contents of the Tomb? Powering the wards? Containing the contents? Sustaining the contents? I'm still not entirely sold on the official story that this is some kind of monster the Emperor defeated. I had actually initially suspected, before I fully understood Lyctorhood, that the Emperor's body itself was in there, sustained by the 9th, and he was remotely puppeteering whatever convenient body he so desired somewhere else.

But also, after everything that happened... 4 bodies missing? Coronabeth and the member of the 2nd were both alive at last check, so fair enough. Moreover we've got some pretty hints that seem to imply Coronabeth desperately wanted to be her sister's Cavalier, and that thread has not been pulled yet. Camilla was... badly hurt, but she was also medically capable.

The one, of course, that really gets me is Gideon. No surprise there, I imagine. Fucking inexplicable is what she is. Lives through nerve gas, survives the awful living conditions of the 9th and comes out the other side as an extremely competent warrior, is somehow of strong interest to an OG Lyctor, to the point of specifically sparing her while killing someone in the next bed over, makes it through the energy drain trial with apparently no lasting injuries, despite the fact that she absolutely should not have. Has her name appear on a random scrap of paper in a 10,000 year old laboratory. And now her body is missing.

Barring time shenanigans, that would imply Gideon dates back 10,000 years, and was somehow involved in the original Lyctor trials. Which really is kind of at odds with the story of her landing on the 9th as a child 20 years ago.

I have aggressively little information about what her deal is. What it boils down to is that she survives things she simply shouldn't be able to. I assume either that Harrow is either going to have some very weird Lyctor experiences related to the fact that that's who her battery is, or that, somehow, despite literally giving her soul away, she's still going to somehow survive and do things.

My narrative brain is at war, saying at once that her somehow surviving would cheapen her death, and that there's so much mystery still left in her backstory that the plot cannot possibly be done with her yet. What I'd expect, and frankly what would make all of this line up perfectly, is for her voice to somehow remain intact in Harrow's head, like it did when Harrow first became a Lyctor, but that stopped in the first minute or so, so I'm curious if it'll somehow resume? Unclear.

(As an aside, this is all putting me in mind of the Johnny Silverhand thing from Cyberpunk. I am very compelled by the image of Gideon kneeling over Harrow's body, like 'wake the fuck up, Harrow. We've got a city to burn.')

On less major notes:

I still do not know why Cytherea really just seemed to hate the 4th. Like... She killed other people, yeah, but these kids were fully on edge for like several days beforehand, talking about how they felt like they were being stalked, and she painted, in blood, on the walls 'death to the 4th' before killing them. Baffling.

There's definitely something about the salt water thing. I'd almost discount it as some 9th tradition, with Harrow's parents doing it just because 'that's how it's done,' but for the fact that Teacher, in one of his few actual statements of personal opinion, talks about his hatred of water, and we later find out he is about as close to a sentient undead as we've seen. I half expected that to become relevant by the end of the book, but no such luck.

Anyway. Book is good, and one must imagine these questions will be dispelled, and new, even more baffling questions will take their places when I move on to the next book.

#The Locked Tomb #gtn #gtn spoilers #I had also heard that this book got freaky #Or possibly the series as a whole #So far so normal #You know #Some fucked up implications #And some bone monstrosities and soul siphoning #But what's a little soul siphoning between Kismeses?

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comicgeekery · 6 months ago

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Sherlock & Co.: The Sign of Four

New Sherlock and Co. Thoughts!

Ok, so of course I HAD to talk about The Sign of Four. I was intrigued from the first episode. I’d been wondering when and how Sherlock and Co. would tackle the novels. They sprinkled in a few elements of The Valley of Fear early on, but that novel is a whole other situation, seeing as the majority of it isn’t a Sherlock Holmes story at all. And of course A Study in Scarlet is unavoidable as Watson and Holmes’ origin story. I suspect S&C will visit those again in different forms at some point, since neither mystery was really explored.

So The Sign of Four was an interesting choice at this stage. The show’s gotten into a good grove with 2-4 part adventures, they could have done for ages more, but it looks like the S&C team is ready to tackle more ambitious ideas.

I admit I was nervous at the start. Some of the four-part adventures have felt over-stretched (particularly Silver Blaze), so a TEN-parter might have been a disaster. Thankfully, I had nothing to worry about! The Sign of Four was captivating every week, brilliantly balancing interesting elements in every episode while also keeping the listener engaged with the larger mystery.

There were excellent deductions, familiar humor, some genuinely gripping suspense, and SO much fun when the gang all went to India! Whoever it is on the writing team who loves to write in poetic descriptions of landscapes had an absolute ball about that long train ride. I really felt like I could feel the scenery, not to mention the peaceful comradery of John, Sherlock, and Mariana. It’s so heartwarming to see how close they’ve all gotten.

I also really appreciate the tactful way that the writers and characters dealt with questions of Indian culture, British colonialism, and the connections between superstition, history, and the many things a big diamond might mean to different people. Everything seemed super respectful of India and British people of Indian descent. I don’t know if anyone at S&C is Indian themself or if there were sensitivity advisers or what, but it all clearly came with significant effort and that was SO nice.

(Note: I am white though, so it’s also possible that I missed some inaccuracies or insensitive elements.)

However, the real star of the show was always going to be the often-reimagined Mary Morstan. I was VERY curious about her, as in the original canon she and Watson get married shortly after the events of The Sign of Four.

In canon my opinion of Mary is…fine. She’s fairly brave in her adventure and it’s cute how she and Watson fall in love. But…yeah. That’s it. She’s mentioned offhand in a few other stories. Her presence is actually so vague that Sherlockians struggle to establish a timeline for her after The Sign of Four. She becomes Mrs. Watson. She’s there. She dies at some point so Watson can move back in with Sherlock. Then she’s back again? Or maybe she’s a second wife, also named Mary? It’s another one of those areas where the fans care more about Sherlock lore than Doyle ever did.

So there’s been various versions of Mary in the hundreds of Sherlock Holmes adaptations over the years. She’s usually pretty boring, a plot convenience for Watson to talk to about his latest adventure with that master detective what’s-his-name. I’m not sure if she ever showed up on Elementary, since they were focused on that whole Joan/Irene/Moriarty thing. And BBC’s Sherlock got…interesting with her. I wasn’t a fan of Mary as a secret elite assassin, but I give them credit for at least doing something with her. Until she died. Which was stupid.

The trouble with Mary is that, no matter how incredibly straight Holmes and Watson are, Mary functions as a wedge between the BroTP. She is, explicitly, the reason Watson moves out. And, since so many writers struggle to convey that people generally love and cherish more than one person at once, that means Mary must to an extent replace Sherlock in Watson’s heart.

I say all that because I want to emphasize that, hands down, Sherlock & Co.’s portrayal of Mary Morstan is the best I have ever seen.

I’m on record as really rooting for Sherlock & Co. to evolve into a gay romance. Fans have been waiting literally over 100 years for Sherlock and John to fall in love and be a couple in a professional production. I’ve felt shipping vibes in some episodes and in others John and Sherlock seemed completely platonic to me. I knew bringing in Mary could mean confirming the show as another Strictly Straight interpretation. Which would be disappointing, but not actually a sign of poor quality in any way.

First off, Mary was introduced as not quite a new character. She was meant to go on a date with Watson in the first episode, but got held up because of a traffic accident (and Sherlock did a bunch of deductions and was very clever). In functioning as a call-back to the first episode, she also easily illustrated the growth that John has had since the start of the show, when he was so freshly traumatized and uncertain about his life. Back then, it just made sense to him that his date would ghost him. He was the kind of person to be ghosted.

But we also got beautiful insights into Mary’s character. I think it was a brilliant idea to open the story with a recording of Mary as a child getting her plot-relevant bedtime story from her father. S&C is often limited in what it can portray because of the “true-crime podcaster” premise. This diagetic flashback was super clever and excellent way to tell the listener “We’re doing something different this time. Something big.”

Mary is such a FULL character too. She’s smart but shaken from her own military PTSD. She has a goofy, self-deprecating charm that complement’s John’s similar humor. She’s bisexual, a trait that informs her past and personality without feeling like just a token element to please the fans. She’s got complicated feelings about her father and his legacy. She’s understandably torn between wanting to help save a missing boy and bring criminals to justice or just washing her hands of a situation that seems to hurt more with every twist.

She and John do have an easy chemistry. They bond over their similar humor, their military trauma, and just being a warm piece of comfort for each other. As a fan of pairing John and Sherlock, there were times where I outright groaned because of how great Mary was and how sweet her budding relationship with John was. Beautiful, infuriating, 10/10.

SPOILERS BELOW

By the last episode of The Sign of Four, I was ready to admit defeat. Clearly Mary was going to be a new regular cast member and I was going to love her for the rest of the show….which is also basically what John thought.

I sincerely did not expect for her to die. Why would she? She was such a great character! I didn’t expect to end a Sherlock and Co. adventure with a real, lasting tragedy. Other characters have died, but never ones I would expect to be mentioned as on-going sources of grief in later adventures.

Her death also felt surprisingly real. It took her a week to die from her wounds and she was touch and go in the hospital. She easily could have lived. And now she’ll always be a point of a divided timeline for John. Of what might have been.

When BBC’s Sherlock killed off Mary, it felt cheap and perfunctory. She died to raise the stakes and the drama for Sherlock and John. I was never especially clear on why John was so in love with her, honestly. (It didn’t help that he’d been considering an affair at the time.) Sherlock and Co. has just delivered a masterful lesson on how to introduce a character, make her sincerely matter, and then make her death hurt for the simple reason that now she’s gone.

Bravo to Sherlock and Co. and bravo in particular to Acushla-Tara Kupe for her excellent performance as the best damn Mary Watson who never was.

#sherlock & co #mary morstan #sherlock holmes

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tears-of-boredom · 3 months ago

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a thing. hester, sam, dean, castiel.

hester and sam are friends, dean doesnt recognise this new guy, castiel is awkward meeting her. hester ends up joining the brothers for a hunt when castiel has to leave.

some details are meaningless, some are hinting to major "plot" points. have fun guessing which are which.

hester uses he/she. it might be confusing, sorry.

i formatted this in html, but because of the read more i needed to turn it into rich text in-between. hopefully it didn't mess anything up.

"I think she is doing this to you."

"No, Baby, come on, you can't do this to me right now."

"What have I done wrong? I've been so good to you, Baby."

"Dean, you're being really pathetic."

"Well, so-rry for caring about the only family we have left!"

"Just get out. Let's see what's wrong with her."

"Could both of you, just, let me take care of her in peace, alright? Go read your articles or something."

"No reception, of course."

"You know I probably could just, fix it."

"Don't you dare use your freak ass powers on her, alright? Just give me a minute and I'll have her up and running again."

"We've given you three hours, Dean."

"And if you guys stopped distracting me, I'd be done already!"

"Wait- Dean, we're in Wisconsin, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Wait, was it ghosts or demons last time?"

"Well, doesn't this seem familiar to you?

Car breaks down on some deserted back road in Wisconsin, we don't have service, and you spend hours trying to find the problem, with no luck?"

"I think we ended up on 'human'."

"Hey, should we do something about that?"

"Cas, what- ...oh."

"Hi to you, too," Sam says.

The only thing missing from the otherwise perfect recreation of a past event appears: A ginger farmer biking towards them on the road.

The bicycle is tossed aside near the impala. "Sam!"

The stranger runs to them, hugging Sam like the two are old friends.

"Oh and- Gene, was it?" The stranger seemingly recognizes Dean.

"No it's-"

"Wait, Sam, didn't you say your brother quit, though?"

"He did, but he came back."

"Ah, like an addict."

"Dean, you don't remember?"

"Pretty much."

Castiel seems content on waiting for an explanation.

Not Dean:

"Sam, what the hell's going on? And did that guy just call me a drug addict?"

"Wait, hold on, I think I remember you," Dean says.

"Hey, let me-" The stranger clears his throat and does a dramatic bow before continuing:

"Sampo Hester Tuline-Gonzalez is the name, at your service once more."

"I tried to paint your car? You punched my dad? I punched you, multiple times?" the stranger, Sampo, provides.

"Wait, you're the- the witch girl! But wait, you're a dude now?" Knowing who the stranger is only seems to confuse Dean further.

"Was that like a rhetorical question or...?"

"Weren't you a girl before?"

"No, 'cause 'Hester' is definitely a girl's name."

"Nah, I think you're remembering wrong."

Hester's nonchalant tone is starting to annoy Dean.

"Okay, but my name's Sampo, though."

Sampo seems to contemplate his answer before saying:

"You- You know what? Forget it, never mind. You gonna help us with the car or what?"

"No thanks; I don't make a habit of helping strangers."

"Wha- but you-!" Dean stutters, and then settles on:

"We're not strangers, Hester!"

Castiel is caught off-guard by the sudden attention on him:

Instead of answering, Sampo pointedly stares at the quiet man standing behind Dean.

"Ah-" He looks to Dean for help.

"Guess we're not strangers anymore."

"Sam?"

One word yet it seems like the brothers are having a full conversation with just their eyes.

It's over in a few seconds as Dean addresses Hester:

"That's Castiel, he's a hunter too."

"Come on, just go tell your daddy to come tow us."

"What's in it for me, huh?"

Dean glowers at him, "You know, I'm really starting to remember you."

"Good for you, man. Now, what do I get for getting my daddy, huh?"

Dean lets out a sigh of frustration, then looks to his brother: "Sam."

"You pimping out your brother now? Didn't know you rolled like that Dean."

Sampo just laughs; "Dude, Dean, you're so fun to talk to, man. So easy to piss off."

"Sam, please. I'm gonna punch your gi- boy- whatever-friend if you don't fucking say something."

Sam lets out his own sigh, but obliges:

"Come on, Sampo, Dean'll pop an artery if you keep going."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that for your own sake," Dean looks about ready to give Hester a brand-new black eye.

"Confident now, are we?"

"Sampo," Sam insists.

Sam tries his best to not laugh at that, and keeps his hardened gaze on Sampo.

"God forbid a woman does anything!"

"Fine, I'll go!" She walks toward her abandoned bicycle.

"I wasn't even speaking!"

"But Dean better think of a way to thank me by the time I get back!"

Dean was about to tell Hester just how thankful he is, but she's already out of earshot when he opens his mouth.

He directs his anger towards Sam instead:

"Shut up."

"But you were thinking about it."

---

"How come I have to sleep in a shack when these two get to sleep inside?"

"Because I don't like you, Dean. Plus; there's only one couch."

"Wait, are you guys sharing the couch?"

"No, we're not."

"There's space upstairs."

"Dean, the bed in the garage is literally better than the couch, I don't get what you're complaining about."

"It's cold."

"Look, if you really want to, you can sleep on the floor in the living room. I just think your back's gonna kill you in the morning if you do."

"Why can't I just take the couch? Cas doesn't even need to sleep!"

"...I'm taking the floor, but don't think I'm happy about it."

"Everyone needs to sleep, Dean, and like I said; I don't like you, so you don't get the couch."

"Wasn't going to."

---

"Oh yeah, I know that place. Like my own pockets." Sampo's voice is full of confidence.

Dean is already growing frustrated with her. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Are you gonna tell us?"

"What have we been discussing this whole time?"

"What d'you wanna know?"

The smile on her face shouldn't annoy Dean as much as it does.

"Wait, you think there's a ghost there?"

Hester is either a very good liar, or she genuinely wasn't listening at all.

"I don't feel sorry for you," his brother responds.

Both options piss Dean off equally.

"Sam, I can't do this."

"What? What have I done?"

"Dean, just use the name he gave you. It's really not that hard."

"It's her name, though!"

"So is Sampo, and I'll introduce you to Onnikki soon if you don't start addressing me properly." The lighthearted tone in Sampo's voice is gone now.

"...Sammy, which animal was Onicki again?"

"The horse."

Dean's expression to hearing that is priceless, but Sampo is too busy, counting down from ten in his mind, to laugh at it.

"You know what, I think you misunderstood me: I meant that 'Sampo' is your name, not the other one!"

Dean's smile hasn't worked on Hes- Sampo so far, but it never hurts to try.

Especially when his hoof-kick virginity is on the line.

She seems to accept his surrender:

"Dean, just, I'm going to make it clear, okay? 'Hester' is my first name, 'Sampo' my second name.

"Fine. Can you tell us where the house is, now?"

I know you got to call me 'Hester' in the past, but nowadays I really only let people who I'm close with call me that.

It doesn't bother me if you slip up sometimes, but the next time you call me 'Hester' on purpose, I'm going to let Onnikki give your 'Baby' a remodeling."

"Okay, well, I might've exaggerated about how well I know the place."

"Of course."

"-But! I do know how to get there. Approximately."

"And can you share with us this approximate path?"

"Okay, don't get mad, but I kinda can't..."

"Well, I have been there. And I do know how to get there, probably.

Dean, decidedly, does not get mad.

"...Go on."

But, it's one of those things where I just kinda wandered around randomly and ended up there. So, I kind of have to see the path to know that it's the right one."

"God damn it."

"Why couldn't we just like, send you pictures once in a while and ask which way to go?"

"Dean, if you can get a camera to work here, please tell me how."

"There's no way it goes this far."

"...This magnet shit is annoying as hell."

"Like I said; if you get it to work, I'm happy to make a change of plans. Just don't have high hopes."

...

"Told you so."

"Genuinely, how far does this go?"

"Wait, so, you're the source of the interference?"

"I mean, people in town can use shit just fine.

Except me. When I try to even change the volume of the TV at Tom's, it immediately goes to static."

"Oh."

"I mean, it's possible, I guess.

Though, dad said it was happening already when he and mom moved here."

"Yeah, I don't recommend thinking about it too hard. You wont 'figure it out' anyway, and you'll just get a headache."

"Are you calling me dumb?"

"I'm just speaking from twenty years of experience. Unless you've joined the freak-o club, you ain't getting farther than I have."

"Fine."

---

"Maybe if you wouldn't have take us on a god damn hike beforehand, we'd have gotten here earlier!" Dean, like everyone else, was speaking in whispers.

"Did we really have to do this during the night, though?"

The house looked ten times more haunted now than ever.

"If you guys would plan better, we could've left in the morning and made it here before dark!"

The squabbling seemed even more childish when both parties were whisper-yelling their words.

"And how long did it take you to even say if you knew the place or not, huh?"

"Guys, shut up already!"

She really needed to stop spewing so much bullshit.

She could've just told them that she didn't know shit about ghosts; the famous Winchesters would've found a way to kill the thing without her.

The table Sampo was hiding under probably did absolutely nothing in terms of cover. Maybe the ghost would find the stupid hiding spot so funny that it would die of laughter when it found him.

Yeah, that's definitely likely.

Sampo would have to paint green and pink polka dots on the impala when they got back. If they got back.

For what fucking reason did they ees leave him on his own. Ees joku vitun warning ois auttanu. Mut eei, jätetään tää skidi vaan yksin, se on todellakin todistanu skillssinsä. Miks niitten piti luottaa vi-

The was a sound. Like something sharp dragging against a wall.

Vitun fuck.

Suddenly her breathing was the loudest thing in the universe. How could the ghost not immediately hear it.

The source of the sound kept getting closer and closer. There were no footsteps.

Vittu Jumal auta en ikin valehtele enää.

The table flipped. Sampo shot.

She shot again.

She could hear the table crashing into a wall behind her.

The ghost seemed to stagger slightly from the salt before recovering.

The ghost staggered less this time.

It was a double-barreled shotgun.

The ghost was counting. Sampo vaguely remembers it speaking about the number seven earlier. And "ankle-biters".

She somehow managed to put up a fight against this thing.

Now though, it was over. She had cuts on her arms, there was a lot of blood.

It made a new cut on her left arm and laughed at the wince Sampo let out.

"Five," the ghost spoke like an old radio.

Another cut. She managed to not wince.

"Six."

Why Mötley Crüe of all bands. Maybe I'll at least obsess over something cooler in my next life. Like Hendrix, or even CCR.

It raised the fan blade above his head.

The ghost's weapon of choice would've been funny if every regret he had in life wasn't running through Sampo's mind:

Since when did I believe in reincarnation?

"Se-"

CRASH! CA-THLUNK! KRRSH!

"Hester!"

What? Where did the ghost go?

Something grabbed her around the ribs.

It was going to crush her alive now?

"Can you please just get it over with. I'm so tired of this fucking game."

Was she really going to spend her last minutes begging to die?

"What the fuck..." Sampo realised that the arms around him weren't hurting him.

"Yeah, I'll get you out of here."

...That's not a radio...

"You've lost a lot of blood, Est; you're probably in shock as well. But you're safe now."

"Yeah, hi, it's me. I'm carrying you out of here, okay?"

Her hands climbed up to the collar of the familiar jacket.

"Sam."

"Sammy, you're an angel."

"And you're getting blood in my hair."

"I'm sorry," her hands stayed where they were, though.

"It's okay, it'll wash out."

"Miks sie oot nii enkeli. And puppy."

"I'm still not fluent in Finnish, Hester."

"Sorry," she placed an apology kiss on his neck.

"Umh...It's- it's fine. Let's just get you home."

"'Kay...It's cold..."

"Jesus, what happened to her, man?"

"What do you think, Dean?" Sam tried to look for a relatively un-filthy spot on the ground to place Hester down.

"I'm gonna paint your car, Dean."

"At this rate, you'll die before you can even see Baby again." Dean was already bandaging her left arm.

"Nah, I won't." Sampo's slowed speech is not exactly reassuring.

"You have to stay awake long enough to guide us back, alright?"

"It's so bright here," Hester answered.

"...Dean, you have good memory, right?"

"I'm calling Cas."

"There's no service, Dean."

"Sam, I'm a mummy, look." She was holding her bandaged arms straight in front of her.

"That's great, Est."

"C'mon, don't look so worried. I'm not even in shock yet."

"Yet."

"Hey, my camera works!" Dean exclaimed.

"Okay? Is that supposed to help?"

"But it didn't work before!"

"Dean, we don't fucking care about your shitty phone camera, alright?"

"Hey, my bandages are bleeding through, is that bad?"

"When is it ever a good thing to bleed?" Sam found more bandages to wrap on top of the already red ones.

"Would you rather I didn't bleed when stabbed?"

"Look, I can handle you being some weird inhuman creature, but not you bleeding dry in front of my eyes!"

"Woah..." Sampo's blood loss was getting to her, judging from the far away look she now had.

"Dean, we're going."

"What, and leave her here?"

Sam lifted Sampo again, making sure her legs stayed raised. "Obviously not!"

"Aw, bummer."

"Shut up."

#spn #my art #hester tuline #tried to edit the formatting. the <br/> all are lost in this tumblr rich text

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cannibal-walleye · 6 months ago

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I've been thinking about TSotS a lot lately, and I can't stop thinking about how I didn't realize BOTH of them didn't know eachothers hybrid status.

I've already talked a bit about how this effects Skizz and his perception of what's going on, but I've been thinking about Impulse a lot more.

At first, in one of the first chapters, 3, I think, when we first see impulses not-a-crush-crush on his angel classmate, and I thought it was fueled by his.. let's say growing fondness of his angel bestfriend (id specify "online" but... he doesnt seem like a very social creature)

But now that I know he doesn't know Skizz is an angel (which tbf i probably should have picked up on lol, i feel like if he knew it would have been a much more major plot point by now) it makes his crush feel a lot more real and present and important. Because at the end of the day, it is. His crush wasn't influenced by Skizz, making it (unknowingly) more important to him because this is his first crush, ever. He truly did just become enamored with an angel for seemingly no reason. And it's scary.

This makes for a couple interesting directions this story can take when he does eventually learn skizz is an angel (assuming that happens before he meets Skizz in person and they live happily ever after with no problems at all. Definitely.).

A) he becomes even more enamored with his classmate

B) full on falls head over heels for skizz

C) unintentionally ghosts Skizz (and avoids his classmate at all costs) because he's having multiple gay panic attacks ("skizz is an angel? Like that guy in my class? Are his wings as pretty? Is the guy just as nice as skizz?")

D) begins to put the dots together and starts to freak out... or alternatively does the opposite and sees no connection what so ever. Silly guy.

Or E) some secret 5th thing that only an author could come up with because being a writer is actually just playing 3D chess with the characters (and readers)

Also I'm so. So. normal about the apology pastries. I will not survive that interaction. (And for the sake of this ramble, we're not thinking about the outcome possibilities. Because i will be here for hours if i so much as think about how that will go down + the aftermath)

Insane rambles that make little to no sense, probably missing some stuff I wanted to mention, and also very rushed because. Well I need my thoughts on some kind of paper or I will explode/pos. They take up an insane amount of my thoughts. Send help. (And to think, i was somewhat normal about skizzpulse before this fic... i regret nothing)

I feel like I've achieved absolutely nothing with this long ask, but, oh well. As always love your tippy taps and your scritchy scratchs (writing and art) remember to drink and eat! Don't Let the concerned-for-your-wellbeing Skizz bite!

Hi hi hi it's been like,, a month since u sent this in. I'm so sorry lol. I LOVE to get asks (THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU-), I just don't always respond in a timely manner rip.

Anyways! THEORIES AND STUFF my beloved >:))))

I don't think it's been mentioned explicitly, mainly because I don't like to do straight exposition and prefer to work information into the plot naturally, but they know next to nothing about one another's personal information. They've both been very strict about protecting their privacy for a variety of reasons, so yeah. Skizz didn't know Impulse was a demon, and while Skizz has certainly hinted that he's an angel, he hasn't explicitly told Impulse.

And that's one thing I really like about how their relationship is going to develop; it said in the tags, but it's simultaneously friends to lovers and strangers to lovers, because at least at the beginning, the online and in-person personalities have no direct association with one another. So yeah, Impulse just likes this random angel for no reason other than SMOKING HOT, and it has nothing to do with Skizz (yet ;))

ughh I love all your theories, there are SO many things that could happen from here. And of course, nothing is going to be directly confirmed or denied, but I will say at least part of several of your theories are going to happen >:)) With angst, naturally. ughhh you don't even KNOW. lots of 3D chess with multiverse time travel going on.

Hehe the apology pastries. An idea like that will pop into my head and I'm just like,, yes. this is it. I have been ✨enlightened✨ They're just cute and stupid and they deserve to have good things to eat, and PURRING ehehehehehe >:))))) fool's gonna fall so hard, he doesn't even know what hit him

And, like always, I don't mind rambles!! Ramble as much as you want!! Ramble more!!!!! I just don't always get to them in a timely manner rip, but don't take that as me being annoyed or uninterested because I want to knowwwww your thoughts, please and thank you :))) And don't say you've achieved nothing! It all adds to my motivation :D These asks and the comments I get really help to get me out of slumps in motivation and such, so I really really appreciate it <3

Okies that's all, haves a good day, I'm going to go write now :))

#walleye asks #skizzleman #impulsesv #hermitcraft #ao3 fanfic #skizzpulse #this side of the screen

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wayward-robin · 7 months ago

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2x08 – Parenthood thoughts

Lip might be incredibly intellectually smart but he really needs to learn to take some advice. Fiona trying to persuade him back to school if she gets her diploma too was a fun twist I didn’t see coming. Lip really shouldn’t underestimate her because I think she’s more than capable of doing it.

Kev knows what’s up too. Lip should just go to school, graduate college and rule the universe. Lip is never gonna be happy being one of those yes men in any sort of workplace. I can’t even see him at a desk job. That boy is always moving. He needs to be out there doing something practical and game changing.

I love Sheila. I’ve said it before and I’m sure I’ll say it many times more. She just gets some of the best lines. “My mother has cancer” / “The bad kind?” William H Macy has great comedic facial expressions because it was natural how he was just baffled by the encounter. Sheila and Frank genuinely have some of my favourite conversations. They’re always talking at cross purposes.

I had absolutely no idea what the heck was gonna happen with Sheila and Grammy Gallagher under the same roof… I was thinking the whole ep one of them is gonna kill the other and as it turns out, I was actually right! Sheila still sat on Peggy and telling Frank his mother died had me in stitches!

Jimmy/Steve coaching Carl’s football team to spend more time with Fiona? Yeah, ok that’ll go down well. Although Frank lusting after Steve and not realising it was him was pretty funny.

The other major plot point this ep was Ian and Mickey getting caught getting hot and heavy in the Kash & Grab by Frank (seriously, Ian, you’ve already been caught there once before, don’t be a dummy).

Mickey was really spooked. I’m sort of with Ian though, Frank sprouts all sorts of rubbish and goes on such long rants that I don’t think people even listen to what he’s saying anymore. If they’re gonna get dobbed in to Mickey’s dad, I think it’ll be something they do themselves to get caught. I’m not surprised in the least Mickey’s dad’s probably homophobic.

I’m actually kinda glad he decided to land his ass back in juvie rather than kill Frank to shut him up. I know I thought Mickey was a thug in his intro but I’ve realised since he layers and I’m not sure he could kill anyone unless they actually hurt someone he cares about. Which would be Mandy (and maybe Ian?).

I’m now back to missing Ian and Mickey together I guess. They don’t have a lot of scenes but they have by far some of the best chemistry together of the romantic relationships.

#robin watches #shameless us #shameless us season 2 #frank gallagher #fiona gallagher #lip gallagher #ian gallagher #debbie gallagher #carl gallagher #kevin ball #veronica fisher #sheila jackson #mickey milkovich #jimmy lishman #gallavich #fiona x jimmy

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tempenensis · 2 years ago

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I know you don't usually weigh in on non-canon content, but I've seen a lot of people say 236 was a bad ending, or like gege joked, that things are moving too fast or he's missed a chapter (or 20, I'm personally annoyed that we jumped from Nov to Dec 24, I know gege wants the manga to end for some reason, but those three weeks of training/preparation would have been a great time to let us get re-invested in the student characters since the culling game arc felt like it was missing so much)

Do you have any feeling for what could have been a better way to end things, if indeed things are ended, for Gojou Satoru? Or do you agree that things have been moving too fast?

Sorry for this and please feel free not to answer if this is not the kind of question you want to entertain, I am just curious if you have an opinion you're willing to share since I feel you have a very good grasp of the jjk's plot and themes! I trained as a literature major, so my interest is always in whether character consistency is maintained and what a story is saying and whether that message is carried successfully or not and what that might mean for us as readers. I'm personally still on the fence about this particular twist because I'm trying to withhold judgement of the piece until we actually see it as a whole, but I am starting to feel that the narrative started to unravel a bit after Shibuya, like somehow we didn't see a lot of the characters to their full potential (like Nobara T.T my baby Nobara). Maybe this is just part of gege's notorious fast pace.

Some of this I believe is due to JJK's titular meaning of the issue of curses and what they represent being an "endless battle" but there's only so many times one can show hopelessness and loss I think before it becomes almost redundant. We actually haven't seen that many on-screen sorcerer deaths, but somehow it's been two of the most popular adult characters so far, and only direct mentors, which is a frequent trope of the hero's journey in western literature. I think that even though I really wish it hadn't happened, Nanami's ending made a lot of sense. Power-wise, Gojo's current death also makes sense, and he's not the kind of character who instantly changes his mind or learns something in his heart from a single experience, but I think it feels somewhat frustrating from my point of view because despite the bodhisattva imagery, he had more to learn as a living person, rather than continuing to believe he was like a flower and maybe no one had the right to ask him to understand. I don't know, it's just a bit frustrating for me because I think it feels character consistent (which I think gege tends to be pretty good at) but somehow incomplete too.

Again my apologies for the long ask, you're always the one I wish I could sit down and have a conversation about these things with!

-raindrop anon

Hi, raindrop anon,. Good to see you again.

First of all, I don't really think Gojou's death is particularly bad, but yeah, as you said, there might be something leaves to be desired in the plot - if jjk is a traditional shonen manga, that is. But jjk is different, which is also the reason for its popularity. I feel that jjk storytelling has always been fast-paced, and one thing that Akutami-sensei does really well is to stick to the main points that he wants to tell with his manga. The last time we have a non-serious non-battle chapter was probably chapter 64 lol - but at the same time, this also shows how jjk departs from the traditional shonen jump manga custom where the mangaka tends to drag the story to make the manga runs longer. Gege on the other hand, seems adamant to want to end the story sooner than later (if his last estimation is to be believed, only a few months left for jjk).

I don't actually have a strong feeling of how gege should end thing with Gojou, but it's been a habit of him to get to the.. shocking side of things; we see this with Gojou getting sealed back in Shibuya. Nanami's death. Then we see the Culling game, and Tengen getting killed. And lastly for Gojou to die. The longstanding status quo is going to be changed eventually. And the next one with status quo is already targeted; Sukuna himself.

As I follow this manga, "things moving too fast" has always been the opinion I saw a lot discussed here in my askbox for many, many developments in the manga. And this is more of a personal preference, but I actually like the fast-get-to-the-point-storytelling that Gege uses with jjk, exactly because how it breaks away from traditional jump manga. I feel that this fast pace is just how gege do his storytelling since the beginning lol

tldr is all I can say is jjk has always been different and fast-paced, gege is unpredictable, and I'm in the opinion that Gojou's death does make sense, unfortunately :')

#le-ask #jjk #jjk manga spoilers #jjk236 #gojou satoru

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twistedtummies2 · 8 months ago

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Top 15 OTHER Disney Villain Songs

A couple days ago I went over my Top 15 favorite villain songs from animated Disney movies (not counting Pixar or previously non-Disney properties). However, as anybody who knows Disney is doubtlessly aware…yeah, they’ve got a LOT more you can look at than just those movies. Disney has expanded its mighty empire of media to all kinds of outlets: animated television, direct-to-video features, video games, musical theatre shows, and live-action screen productions. Just about every outlet, somewhere and at some point, has featured its fair share of villainous musical numbers. While the majority of these tunes aren’t as renowned as any of those in the theatrical animated pictures, some of them are pretty good villain songs in their own right, and I feel they deserve to be recognized. So, I’m going to go over just a few of those musical numbers today: terrifying and traitorous toe-tappers that come from all across Disney’s expanded media. Once again, I should point out, I won’t be including things from Marvel, LucasFilm, or other such properties that have sort of fallen under the Disney banner over time: these will be for things that were always directly Disney-related. With that said, however…just about anything goes. From the theme parks to the silver screen, these are My Top 15 OTHER Disney Villain Songs.

15. The Happiest Home in These Hills AND Every Little Piece, from Pete’s Dragon.

This entry is the one and only entry on this countdown where I decided to count two songs instead of just one, both from the same feature. Why? Well, not only BECAUSE they’re from the same feature, but because both are actually pretty similar in terms of tone and approach! “Happiest Home in These Hills” is sung by the Gogans - a rowdy family of violent mountain folk who have become the abusive surrogate family of our titular character, Pete, right at the start of the film. It is merrily performed by them as they hunt down a runaway Pete through the forest. The Gogans are the secondary villains of the story; the main baddies show up later. They are Dr. Terminus, a wiley con artist, and his right-hand stooge, Hoagy. When the two find out about the titular dragon, Elliot, they plot to capture the creature and chop him up, using and selling his body parts to make a fortune. (YIKES.) Both songs have this sort of “overlay” of being chipper, catchy ditties that have an upbeat tone…but when you really look at the lyrics and what’s going on, it’s actually VERY messed up in both cases. Songs like this can be hit or miss, and it’s weird how both primary sets of villains in the movie get such numbers. I like both songs, and I couldn’t decide which one I really enjoyed more, so I decided to just lump them together.

14. Brimstone & Treacle (and its Reprise), from Mary Poppins: The Musical.

The original movie of “Mary Poppins” doesn’t really have a villain to speak of. The closest thing one could argue fits is the creaky old Bank Chairman, who acts as Mr. Banks’ boss, and even he doesn’t really count. In the stage musical, however - which takes more from the books than the film, really - things change. Enter Miss Andrews: a nasty old hag who is the antithesis of Mary Poppins. While Mary can be strict and prim, Miss Andrews is just pure nightmare fuel: a foul-smelling woman who delights in tormenting children for the very slightest offenses, her “Brimstone & Treacle” elixir a direct contrast to the “Spoonful of Sugar” philosophy Mary has. While her time in the story is brief, Andrews makes quite the impression, as it’s revealed that she was Mr. Banks’ nanny AND the Chairman’s nanny when they were each children (which explains QUITE a lot, I fancy). When Andrews first appears, she sings the titular song as a means of justifying her actions: claiming, essentially, that one has to be cruel to be kind. Later, the song is reprised, as the two nannies face off, with Mary using her powers to humiliate and defeat the wicked old screw, and revealing her for who she really is: a bully with no soul. In the original staging, Mary even goes so far as to BANISH MISS ANDREWS TO HELL. I am dead serious. I…would be utterly SHOCKED at this, but frankly, I say good riddance to the sadistic witch!

13. Who’s Afraid of the Big, Bad Wolf? From The Three Little Pigs.

Hey, no reason I can't include songs from the old cartoons, is there? It is pure iconography and stubborn catchiness in the popular consciousness that lands this little ditty on the countdown. This classic song BARELY qualifies as a villain song, when you really look at it: it’s really just the same few lines repeated over and over, but somehow it’s managed to become just as recognizable and well-remembered as many, MANY other Disney Villain Songs, and Disney songs, in general! People quote it all the time, reference it constantly, and so on. I think it’s the irony of the tune that makes it so memorable, above all else: In the original cartoon, when the Pigs sing this song, it’s usually either just before or just after the Wolf attacks them. In the former case, it serves as slightly humorous foreshadowing: “Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? Let’s see if YOU are!” essentially. In the latter case, it’s kind of funny, because the Pigs were very, VERY clearly afraid only SECONDS ago. Personally, I’m a little more afraid of Virginia Woolf…but that’s another story.

12. Yo Ho (A Pirate’s Life For Me), from Pirates of the Caribbean.

Yep, a song from the Parks! I also considered including “Grim Grinning Ghosts” from The Haunted Mansion, but I decided against it because, while that song is certainly a “spooky” song, I don’t really think it’s a “villain” song. The ghosts aren’t singing about doing evil things, they’re basically just having a nice after(life)party. This song, however, I DO think qualifies as a villain song. Yes, it’s a fun tune - bouncy and merry and all that good stuff - but the lyrics literally have the pirates singing about how much they enjoy being absolutely awful scoundrels. They make no secret of the fact they’re crooks and thugs, and just revel in their own mad antics. It’s a humorous sort of villain song, but it’s still villainous in its lyrical content, and even its context! In the ride, the pirates are singing this WHILE BURNING DOWN AND RANSACKING A CITY. If that doesn’t make this famous little sea shanty a villain song, I don’t know what else will do it!

11. The Frigate That Flies, from The Pirate Fairy.

TOM HIDDLESTON SINGS. Did I get your attention with that? Good! In “The Pirate Fairy” - one of several prequels to Peter Pan made as part of the “Tinker Bell” film series - our main villain is…who else? Captain Hook! Of course, he’s not CALLED Captain Hook YET. Here, he’s simply “James.” In the movie, James and his crew of pirates manipulate an outcast fairy called Zarina, planning to use her powers to make their pirate ship fly, and thus allow them to go anywhere in the world and steal anything they want. However, for the first half of the film, Zarina and the audience are unaware of James’ villainy (I don’t think saying he’s the villain is really a spoiler, for various reasons, hence why I didn’t bring it up earlier). When we first meet the pirates, they sing this jaunty shanty as a way of celebrating their impending victory, as they make plans for what treasures they’ll go after. Much like the two tunes I mentioned from “Pete’s Dragon,” the song is very upbeat and humorous, which makes the underlying menace of these thieving scoundrels (and their later-revealed manipulation) all the more intriguing. For me, though, the highlight is when Hiddleston, as a young James, sings: he somehow makes lines like, “No wicked deed cannot be done!” sound so pure and wholesome, it’s absolutely insane. Not a tune many people are likely to recall, but definitely one worth looking up.

10. It’s Our House Now! From Mickey’s House of Villains.

If you’re a major Disney Villains fan, chances are you’re EXTREMELY aware of this song and its source material. “House of Villains” was a TV movie spin-off of the series “House of Mouse”: the show focused on the cartoonish happenings inside a Toontown nightclub, run by Mickey Mouse, where…basically every single2D animated character in Disney history (and even a few characters from the Parks, surprisingly) would congregate to eat, drink, be merry…and watch various cartoons, with the stories of each episode really just being framing devices that happened around the presented shorts. In this Halloween special, literally ALL of the Disney Villains - both major and minor - join forces. Led by Jafar, they take over the House of Mouse at the stroke of midnight (what better time?). As they lock all their nemeses up in the backrooms, and throw Mickey and his friends out into the streets, the villains all band together to sing this short but very fun song, rejoicing in their success. While the song is great, and it’s really, REALLY cool to see SO MANY VILLAINS all onscreen at the same time…my one complaint with it isn’t so much the song itself so much as the context. And it’s really my major problem with the special as a whole. See, once the villains take over the House of Mouse…well…nothing happens. Like…literally. The cartoons they share don’t take on a more villainous theme, they…don’t seem like they’re doing anything especially illegal or diabolical, when you really think about it. Literally all that seems to REALLY change is the lighting turns red and Jafar becomes the host instead of Mickey. (pauses) Like…that’s it? That’s really it? You have characters like Hades, Ursula, Captain Hook, and so on all working together and…all they do is sing, dance, and then just go back to watching cartoons like nothing happened? LAME. Again, the song itself is fine, and it’s a shining moment in Disney Villain history as far as seeing all the baddies together…but it’s REALLY a shame that all this story and the song itself led up to was…absolutely freaking NOTHING, really. I don’t know what I expected, exactly, but just about anything would have been more interesting than the final result.

9. Do What You Gotta Do, from Descendants 3.

Ah, the Disney Channel Musicals…I guess I couldn’t avoid THEM entirely, could I? As just about anybody can tell you, most Disney Channel Musicals are essentially cookie-cutter products that amount to the same thing: a bunch of teenaged stock characters trying to “stick it to the man” and singing pop-style songs that range from “okay, that’s actually pretty fun and catchy!” to “someone silence this vapid excuse for music IMMEDIATELY, please.” Needless to say, not a fan of a lot of these…and the Descendants films are no exception. These movies focus on the lives of the sons and daughters of many classic Disney Villains…and those sons and daughters are mostly teenage stereotypes, with the actual villains mostly depicted being about as out-of-character as it gets. I really WANT to like these movies, to be honest, and I know the series has its fair share of fans…but for me, these are just so utterly, UTTERLY disappointing. I will say this though: there ARE some good songs strewn throughout all the films, and given the subject matter, nearly ALL of them can qualify as villain songs. I debated what tune I’d place here - other options which arguably would have been more fitting were “What’s My Name?”, “Queen of Mean,” and “Evil Like Me.” (Because even if I can’t stand Kristin Chenoweth as Maleficent, I’ll admit that WAS a catchy song.) After some consideration, I went with the arguably more controversial “Do What You Gotta Do,” from the third film of the series. This old-time-rock-and-roll-style duet is sung by our main protagonist, Mal - the daughter of Maleficent and Hades - and her father…whose name I just mentioned. :P Hades is played by Cheyenne Jackson, and is admittedly one of the villains I felt was handled okay in this reimagining, which is part of why this song gets the vote. The song takes place when Mal tries to get something from Hades to help her on her quest, which leads to a confrontation between the two, as Hades left Mal and her mother many years ago, and the two have had almost zero contact since then. The fact that Mal has joined the heroes’ side doesn’t really sit well with the Lord of the Underworld, either. Hades tries to convince Mal to give him a second chance, not out of any real desire to connect with his child, but mostly because he wants to leave the island he’s trapped on and find new ways to commit evil schemes. Mal, however, is onto him, and is in NO mood to do him ANY favors, under the circumstances. While not STRICTLY a villain song in the typical sense, I felt it qualified enough to gain some recognition, and it’s also quite possibly my favorite song out of all these films. Therefore, I selected it for the coveted placement on this list. I can’t stand the movies, but this melody and sequence is a fun one.

8. I Want It All, from High School Musical 3: Senior Year.

I don’t remember enough to say if the “High School Musical” movies INVENTED the formula for the Disney Channel Musicals, but I think I can safely say they became the debatable gold standard for every single one that followed. Pretty much every Disney Channel Musical after these films has felt like it was basically the same story and characters, just with little tweaks here and there to give them their own unique gimmick, so to speak. While I really didn’t like the first or the second film of the series, I will admit that a.) all of the movies in the franchise have their fair share of fun tunes, and b.) call me crazy, but…I legitimately kind of like the third film. I wouldn’t say it’s perfect, or one of my favorite movies ever, but it’s a slight guilty pleasure for me. I could go into the reasons why, but that would probably take all day: suffice to say, it stands to reason, with that in mind, that my choice of villain song from the trilogy would come from that picture. “I Want It All” is unironically a GLORIOUS villain song, in my opinion: it’s catchy, has a great sense of humor, but also has this wonderful vein of manipulation and even underlying danger. The setup is that the main antagonist of the series - Sharpay Evans, who I can only describe as a G-rated version of Regina George - creates a scheme to sabotage her rivals, so she can get a special scholarship. To this end, she turns to her brother and former henchman from the past two films, Ryan. However, Ryan has seen the light by now, after several years of Sharpay’s knavery, and refuses to take part in whatever villainy she has in mind. So, Sharpay decides to try and persuade Ryan to join her in one last plot. How? By using the one thing she knows she and her sibling share: delusions of grandeur. Sharpay enthusiastically entices Ryan with the idea that, if he helps her this one final time, they could both benefit, and the results could catapult them to stardom. Ryan resists at first, but eventually he’s lured in by the temptation. Not only is the song really fun, but it shows some intelligence on Sharpay’s part: we’ve never really seen her manipulation on display in a MUSICAL form before, and it actually makes sense this would work, since while Ryan may be more or less reformed, it’s known that he’s a bit of an attention-seeker…and also isn’t necessarily the brightest bulb in the bunch. Plus, being an over-the-top, musical-loving thespian sort myself, I can’t deny that the ambition and flamboyance of the number speaks to me in its own way.

7. Tree of Life, from The Lion Guard.

There are MANY great villain songs in “The Lion Guard” (and many great songs in general…seriously, the people behind the music for this show really brought their A game to it). Some marvelously fun tunes I considered that didn’t make the cut were “Outta the Way,” “Panic and Run,” “Let’s Bring Back a Legend,” “When I Led the Guard,” “Lions Over All,” “You Best Not Mess With Mama,” and “Beware of Poa.” I ultimately decided, however, to go with this tune, and not only because of the ironic title (although that certainly does give it some extra points). The song is performed by the central antagonist of Season 3 of the show: Makucha the Leopard. Makucha was a recurring villain in a couple episodes of the first two seasons, but it was in the third and final season where he really stepped up his game, becoming the leader of an army of villains out to take over a mystical place called the Tree of Life. Why does he do this? One word: gluttony. Makucha is interesting because his entire motivation is based around the fact he’s a giant greedy guts. He’s not out to take over the tree for power or glory, and even though he convinces others to join his cause by offering them a chance at revenge on the Guard, among other possible benefits…all that is secondary or even tertiary to him. In this song, he makes it very clear what his plan is: he wants to take over the tree for the simple and singular purpose of eating every single animal he can catch there. That’s it. I don’t know why, but the fact this character becomes such a threat, gathering a whole army to his side and becoming the main climactic antagonist by the end of the series, with such a simple and basic motive is kind of fascinating to me: other villains were ravenous before Makucha in this franchise, certainly, but most of them were either followers of greater foes, or had other motivations besides their hunger that were more prominent, or both. Makucha is just a voracious pig of a leopard, who takes delight in eating animals that are rare or one of a kind in particular, which would be something the Tree of Life is absolutely teeming with. The song has a fun rhythm and some good lyrics, but what I think sells it most is the performer: Makucha is voiced by Steven Blum, of all people, and he’s a surprisingly good singer. He sells this number deliciously, and I think that, above all else, is what gives this tune so much credit in my books.

6. You’re Only Second Rate, from The Return of Jafar.

As I think I said in my previous list, while I do love the “Prince Ali” reprise Jafar sings with such maniacal and mincing passion in the original film, I’ve always felt it’s a little sad that he never got a full and proper villain song all his own in the movie. Thankfully, later Aladdin spin-offs and materials have amended this problem: in the Junior Edition stage show, for example, Jafar originally had a song entitled “Why Me?” In later editions, as well as the Broadway musical, he and Iago gained a duet called “Diamond in the Rough.” And there are several other Jafar-related tunes you’ll find in other places. However, in my opinion, the very best is this one: in the sequel to the original film, Jafar got his own belated musical spotlight. Now with the powers of a genie at his disposal, the villain gets into a sort of magical spitting contest with Genie, and soundly defeats the comical blue fellow, mocking him relentlessly the entire time. The lyrics are wild, the visuals - considering the budget - have a lot of creativity to them, and it’s just great to have Jafar get a song all to himself that allows him to do what he does best: derisively mock people while losing his mind. A somewhat underrated entry in the villain song catalogue for Disney, in my opinion.

5. Snuff Out the Light, from Kingdom of the Sun.

This song is unique on the list, and if you don’t know about it already, you might be a bit confused. For example, you may be saying, “Hey, why is there an image from Emperor’s New Groove here? And what is Kingdom of the Sun?” Well, to make a long story short: “Kingdom of the Sun” was the movie that BECAME “The Emperor’s New Groove.” Originally the film was planned to be a sort of more “traditional” Disney movie, with a plot that combined elements of “The Magic Flute” and “The Prince and the Pauper,” with the familiar Aztec-or-Incan-inspired aesthetic motif that the final film had. However, somewhere along the line, the project changed…but one thing remained the same: the villain, Yzma. At least, a few things about her remained the same: her design was largely kept about the same (albeit handled by a different animator), her name was the same, and her voice actress - Eartha Kitt - was also the same. However, the character’s role in the story did change: in the final film, of course, Yzma is the Emperor’s advisor, and is depicted as a mad scientist who wants to - of course - take over the world. Originally, however, Yzma was a witch, who commanded all the creatures of the night, and her goal was to try and gain eternal youth. In this original version, she had a villain song…but when the film’s script and plot changed, the song was removed, as it no longer had a place in the story. While Yzma would get some other songs in later spin-offs, such as “Feel Like a Million” and “Yzmopolis,” her original song - in which she conjures an army of the night after making a deal with the demon Supei - is ironically her greatest moment in music, in my opinion. While I do like the final result of the film, it’s a shame such a brilliant song never got to see full fruition.

4. My Lullaby, from The Lion King II: Simba’s Pride.

“Tree of Life” was great, but when it comes to Lion King-related villain songs…well, let’s face it, nothing beats “Be Prepared.” BUT, I dare say this tune comes relatively close. In the direct-to-video sequel to the Lion King (which is actually one of the better Disney sequels out there, though still not as good as its predecessor), this song is performed by the utterly demented Zira: a former follower of Scar who acts as the mother to the dark lion’s chosen heir, a mysterious young cub named Kovu. After an encounter between Kovu and Simba’s daughter, Kiara, Zira begins to work out a long-reaching plan to take over the Pride Lands: as Kovu goes to sleep, she plots to train him to be an assassin, who will kill Simba, trick Kiara, and allow her return to power. The resulting “lullaby” is frankly one of the most bloodthirsty and sadistic villain songs not just from any Disney movie, but frankly just in general. Zira is basically fantasizing a bloodbath the entire song through, imagining the murder of Simba and his family and the glory Kovu will bring to her and her pride. It’s a delightfully dark and twisted tune…but in my opinion, it has one major stumbling block: the visuals. The setting, angles, colors, and even the “pattern” of the scene - where interjections from other characters take place, how they happen, when certain shots occur, etc. - all feel EXTREMELY close to “Be Prepared.” It’s pretty obvious that’s the intent, but I wish the visuals had taken a few more risks and gone for a more original approach. There’s a few good moments, mind you, and the song itself is fantastic, but it is a nitpick I cannot overlook.

3. Professional Pirate, from Muppet Treasure Island.

I debated whether or not to include the Muppets, but they’ve been part of Disney much, MUCH longer than Marvel or Star Wars, and this film was released under the Disney banner, so…eh. I’ll give it a pass. “Muppet Treasure Island” is quite possibly my favorite Muppet movie. While other films like “The Great Muppet Caper” are great showcases for the Muppets, and “Muppet Christmas Carol” is a fine adaptation of a classic story I love, this film is BOTH of those things, in my opinion, and balances the elements in a way that I think is more…well…balanced. This song is performed by the great Long John Silver: our central antagonist who leads a band of mutinous pirates on a quest to retrieve long lost treasure. Silver forms a bizarre bond with the main hero of the story, Jim Hawkins: the young boy who discovered the treasure map. In this song, after kidnapping Jim (and while some of his gang work on taking over the ship in the meantime), Silver and his closest confidantes (most of whom are Muppets) try to convince Jim to join their side. They claim that pirates really aren’t as bad as people think…with the irony being that, throughout the song (and the movie as a whole), they’re shown to be completely false in these claims. What I love about this song - aside from the fact it’s…well…just a darn good song, frankly - is two things. One, Silver is played by Tim Curry. Automatic win. Two…Silver actually MEANS what he’s saying. What’s interesting about the character in the Muppet film is that he genuinely and truly believes in a sort of “honor among thieves” mentality: he’s quick to turn on Captain Kermit-I mean, Smollett, but when it comes to the other pirates, he only seems to turn on them or get nasty when they aren’t following his personal code of honor. He also admits that he genuinely cares about Jim, and the two form a sort of father/son bond, which gets strained as the film goes on. He’s genuinely sincere in everything he’s saying, which makes the irony of the truth both hilarious and kind of tragic: it’s telling that, at the end of the film, he reiterates some of the lyrics from this song by saying to Jim, “You’re honest, brave, and true. You did learn that from me.” Jim’s response, “I learned it from my friends, Mr. Silver,” has to cut him to the quick.

2. Ready As I’ll Ever Be, from Tangled: The Series.

This song is very similar to “Savages” from Pocahontas. (Which makes sense, since I THINK this was written by the same people; feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, I very well could be.) Only about half of the song PROPERLY belongs to the villain, but it’s the villain who really drives the song and context of the scene, so I think it counts. “Ready as I’ll Ever Be” occurs in the final episode of season one from “Tangled: The Series” (which would later be retitled “Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure”). The villain of the hour is my favorite character from the show, Varian: a young alchemist who - for a LOT of reasons - has kind of gone off the deep end into crazy-ville, and kidnapped Queen Arianna - Rapunzel’s mother. The heroes form a plan to attack Varian from two different routes - one side trying to sneak into his castle hideaway and ambush him, while the other leads a frontal assault - but Varian, who is one step ahead of the heroes, is making his own preparations. There’s a lot of gret things about this song, but it really is Varian who sells it: first of all, he’s played by Jeremy Jordan. Again, like the previous pick, automatic win. Second of all…Varian is maybe 15 years old, at best, when he does all this. And it is taking an ARMY, and a LOT of strategy, to even TRY and beat him. And it’s made pretty clear that both of those attempts from either side are not going to be as successful as they hope. Something about those facts ALONE just makes the whole song, situation, and the character himself SO fascinating to me: the tension, determination, and desperation of the song are only intensified when you realize it’s literally a battle of the villain against the world…and, shortly after this number, the world nearly LOSES. Later villains would follow Varian, as well as later villain songs, but for me, none of them ever TOPPED this moment. It’s my favorite song in the entire series, and for good reason. That reason, in a nutshell, is Varian.

1. I Put a Spell on You, from Hocus Pocus.

If any “other” Disney Villain song arguably equals the iconic status of nearly any from their animated movies, I think it’s fair to say this would be it. Which is ironic, since the song isn’t even native to the film. “I Put a Spell on You” (originally the work of Screamin’ Jay Hawkins) was a staple of many a Halloween-themed music compilation long before “Hocus Pocus” came out…but nowadays, it’s hard to think of the song, for most people, without specifically thinking of the version performed in the film by the wicked and wonderful Sanderson Sisters: the trio of soul-sucking witches whose devilish antics are the crux of the story. The Sisters - played by Bette Midler, Kathy Najimy, and Sarah Jessica Parker - have the power to hypnotize people with their siren-like voices. They use this to their advantage when they find themselves at a Halloween costume party, where the parents of their victims are all dancing the night away. The witches perform the song to cast a spell on the rest of the partygoers, keeping them under their thrall for the rest of the night, and have a rockin’ good time while doing it! For many, it’s the most famous scene in the entire film, and the sequel tried to replicate it with a similar scene, which had the Sisters singing a cover of “One Way or Another” by Blondie. That scene was fine, but nothing can really top the original. It’s arguably become just as well-known as songs like “Hellfire” or “Poor Unfortunate Souls,” and for that reason above all else, it easily takes the top spot on this list. Case closed.

HONORABLE MENTIONS INCLUDE…

Things Are Not What They Appear, from Pocahontas II: Journey to a New World.

Don’t Fall in Love, from Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas.

Chow Down, from The Lion King: The Musical.

Run, from The Jungle Book Groove Party.

Petey's King of France, from Mickey, Donald, and Goofy in The Three Musketeers.

Impress My Professor, from Phineas & Ferb. (Dr. Doofenshmirtz has a LOT of songs, I chose this one simply because it was the first I thought of.)

#disney #list #countdown #best #favorites #disney villains #villain songs #animation #tv #film #movies #theatre #disney parks #top 15

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