thedailyinch-blog

[thedailyinch-blog]

#13: Replace Calls with Text Messages

I don’t know if I can keep up writing on here every day. It’s hard to come up with new content. Some changes happen intuitively and others just take a few extra days to sink in. One day is not enough always. It’s a daily struggle.

Today, I want to talk about family dynamics. I realize my self esteem has been tied to my parents all my life. This would not be a problem, perhaps, but because my mother is unreasonable in her expectations of me and lays on the guilt anytime I try to assert myself, I feel a deep rooted sense of shame. I want her approval so badly that I have ignored my own needs for years. Finally, I am realizing the change I need to start making is to distance myself from her. I still love my mother with all my heart, but she is not healthy for my self esteem. Today, I am starting this journey by replacing phone calls with text messages. That way I don’t have to listen to the tone of voice she says things in, because it upsets me. 

[thedailyinch-blog]

#12: Sleep is your friend

I really need to catch up on my sleep. This lack of sleep, then crashing out at unexpected moments is not working very well. Once things start getting busy for me in a couple weeks, I won’t be able to keep this up. Need to get back into my routine. Bed at 10, wake at 6.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#11: Art Therapy

Rose: I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste. I can’t imagine Monsieur Monet blushing. Jack: He does landscapes. 

[thedailyinch-blog]

#10: Art doesn’t talk back

I paint to deal with my demons. After a few hours, I forget I ever had them. I have another beauty. Good night.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#9: Grief and Helplesness

Say the things you never had the chance to say. Let them know how much they mean to you. Grieving the loss of someone who hasn’t died. It’s hard..because I feel everything so intensely... I need to learn to detach a little bit.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#8: Touch

Touch communicates understanding and acceptance at a level words cannot.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#7: Memory

Something embarrassing happened to me the other day. I was on the phone with the husband of a woman with Alzheimer’s. I asked him for her name. His response: “I already told you; don’t you remember?” I looked down at my notes and sure enough, there it was. What was going on with me?! I couldn’t concentrate or remember information from minutes ago. Was I developing early signs of dementia? “No! It couldn’t be. I’m too young,” I thought to myself. For a moment, I experienced what a lot of people who are in the early stages feel: embarrassed and inadequate. Today, having dealt with my symptoms for over a week, I know it’s related to lack of sleep. It’s a relief to know the cause is something I can correct. No such hope exists for people with Alzheimer’s right now. I sympathize with them; I don’t know how they do it. The saying “growing old isn’t for sissies” applies here.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#6: Just Woosah…

Next time I want to explode with anger and frustration, or experience anxiety, I need to remember this: inhale…exhale…and be present. This moment will pass and I’ll be okay.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#5: No Offense

Today I’m learning not to be offended when people treat me as a nobody. After all, I’m nobody important in their universe, just like they’re nobody important in mine. It’s pointless to want it to be different; it is what it is. Other people’s actions are not a reflection of me or anything I have done; they are a reflection of those other people. No matter what I do, I cannot control or influence their actions / reactions; I can only control my own. So, the next time I am treated with indifference, I will check my ego, practice kindness, and focus on the important work at hand.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#4: The Path Least Traveled

I took side streets out of downtown today. They are a peaceful alternative to the usual hustle and bustle of our stop-and-go highway system. While I only averaged 35mph, it was faster than I’ve experienced on my usual path. Plus the view was beautiful and path clear in front of me. It beat being stuck in traffic!

[thedailyinch-blog]

#3: CPR Classical Music (88.1)

Classical music calms me. I find it’s especially helpful when I’m in heavy traffic and tempted to road rage. If I feel the need to rage, I quickly change my focus to the music... and all is well in the world again.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#2: Teeth Clenching

Today, I’m making a conscious effort to stop clenching my teeth. I don’t want to live with a sore jaw or headache anymore. It takes away from living the relaxed life I want. By faking it in my body, I hope to convince my mind I am relaxed.

[thedailyinch-blog]

#1: Road Rage

I allowed myself an extra 20 minutes to commute to work this morning. The extra time improved my day. I stopped for coffee and actually enjoyed the drive downtown. Before today, I only allowed myself the time it “should” take. Because the limited time didn't have any wiggle-room, I was enraged and bitter, sitting in what I call “6th avenue parking lot” often.  I recognize how unhealthy my behavior was and have decided to make a change. Starting today, I’m going to allow 2x my usual time for commutes. While I know it won’t always be necessary, it will feel good to know I have extra time if I need it.