#bruce and clark

[ryemiffie]

More quotes from my day as more superbat incorrect quotes:

Bruce: To say I would move heaven and earth for you would not be a just testament to the love my heart harbours for you, for I would tear the realms apart and meticulously recreate the universe in your image if it meant to please you.

Clark: Babe, I literally just wanted to know if it would be chill if I took the last fry, all that was not necessary.

Bruce: Oh. No, I wanted the last fry.

Clark:

Bruce:

Clark: Duel you for it?

Bruce: Sure, I'm gonna win though.

Clark: No you're not.

Bruce: Yes I am.

[arlos-warm-drpepper]

Love the ship dynamic of a character played by Tyler Hoechlin having super-hearing a being in-tuned with his partners heartbeat. And his partner being someone who has great detective skills and helps fight evil-doers with him. Or, in other words:

[353dollars]

just finished reading batman superman world’s finest. the name is well chosen.

i really want them to be my dads. they’re so perfect together and babygirl together.

[asongofstarkandtargaryen]

Fans who appreciate the relationship between Batman and Superman were well fed this week:

[coyote-nebula]

Tip for a Successful Interview: Lie (Down) 

TAGS: Clark Kent & Bruce Wayne, Old Injury, Whump, Hurt/Comfort, casual use of superpowers, Back Pain, references to Batman: Knightfall

FIC SUMMARY:

Clark discovers Bruce in the middle of an “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” dilemma.

Getting him on his feet is complicated.

WORDS: 5,891

CHAPTERS: 1/1

NOTES: A collaboration between me (coyote) and @batbirdies !

ao3 link (archive locked)

[goodknifeboy]

I know there are a lot of fanfics about Jason being caught by the Justice League and usually getting bailed out by the batfam, but imagine if it was Brucie Wayne bailing him out:

In the JL interrogation room:

Superman: Alright, Red Hood, who is your supplier helping you move drugs in Star City?

Red Hood, who was undercover investigating a drug ring and got caught in a JL bust and sesnses an opportunity to mess with Batman: Look, I know you guys aren't cops, but can I get at least get one phone call?

Justice league looking skeptical?

Red Hood: You can even monitor it.

Green Arrow: Fine one phone call, but it will be monitored.

Hands Hood a phone

Red Hood: Hey Dad, I got stopped by the Justice League. Could you come bail me out? Really, okay, see you soon. Okay, my Dad said that he would bail me, so could we go over to the teleporters?

Green Arrow: Okay, firstly, we aren't cops, you can't just post bail and get out. Secondly, how would this "Dad" get up here?

Red Hood: You'll see.

Minutes later, Brucie Wayne walks in with a trail of Heroes, trying to explain why he cannot be at the Watchtower.

Superman: Mr. Wayne what are you doing here and how did you get here?

Bruce laying the Brucie persona on thick: Well as one of the Justice League's biggest doners and tech suppliers I have access to the teleporters, as for why I'm here it's to bail out my son. Hi Jaylad!

Red Hood fully expecting Batman: What?

Green Arrow remembering his friend's grief over loosing Jason: Ummmm, Mr. Wayne this is the Red Hood. You know "Bag full of severed heads" Red Hood.

Brucie: Yes, I know he's had some issues with his big feelings, but he's still my sweet little boy.

Superman: And you think that he's your late son Jason Todd?

Brucie: Yes, Batman even confirmed it was him. It turns out that after he died, he was brought back by an organization that planned on using him as a weapon against Batman. But he left them and has been working to improve Crime Alley, I'm so proud of him.

Green Arrow: We caught him in Star City with Drug runners.

Brucie: I'm sure he has a good explanation, don’t you Jaylad?

Red Hood still reeling from Bruce showing up as Brucie and not Batman: I was undercover?

Brucie: See perfectly reasonable, now can I please have my baby boy back? Alfred will be so upset if he's not home for dinner.

Surprisingly, this works , the Justice League is to stunned by this revelation and later confirm this with Batman that yes, the notorious Red Hood is the son of Billionaire, philanthropist airhead Brucie Wayne. Jason, meanwhile, has suffered a huge blow to his cred in the Hero community because of the association with Brucie instead of the Batfam. The bat siblings do not let this go anytime soon.

[arguablysomaya]

from left to right: clark, bruce, diana

[koroart]

I put way too much effort into this ( based on this meme, it wouldn’t leave me alone until it was drawn — I am freee )

[ditzybat]

clark, discussing what to do about kon with bruce: you know what this means right?

bruce, nodding: yeah, you owe luthor a buttload of child support

clark: what - i - no??

bruce: i mean, it sucks that he baby trapped you but you don’t want to be a deadbeat

clark: he did not - i am not his father, luthor stole my DNA and put that [pointing at kon] into a tube

bruce: i want you to take one good look on how damian came to be

clark: … oh my rao… i am dead beat aren’t i?

[ryemiffie]

More quotes from my day as superbat incorrect quotes:

Superman: Okay I have a plan.

Batman: ?

Superman: ...kissey kiss maybe? Maybe a little kiss kiss?

Batman: ...

Batman: We are about to die you realise that right?

Superman, what can only be described as pouting: Well sorry if I want to die feeling loved.

[arlos-warm-drpepper]

I don’t think he got it..

[jesncin]

Relationship advice from your opportunistic Bat-friend.

[unidentifiedgothamite]

duke: who do you guys think is bruce's favorite child?

jason: it's probably fingerstripes

dick: me?! it's obviously you, jay

tim: it's jason

steph: facts. b lets him get away with everything, including murder

cass: jason

damian: as much as i loathe to admit it, father does treat todd differently

jason: ya'll are trippin'

meanwhile...

clark: b, just curious, but, do you have a favorite child?

bruce: hn, what date is it?

clark: um, may 12th?

bruce: then it's batcow

clark: what

bruce: did i stutter?

[frownyalfred]

Dick is probably the nicest civilian ever when he’s in Bludhaven and all the little old ladies who bring him baked goods and his coworkers at the station have no idea he spends the night beating criminals half to death with his escrima sticks, has the kind of insane family & family loyalty you can’t buy, and would have the entire Justice League at his side with just one phone call.

[begaycommittreason]

officer: are these your children sir?

damian, forcefully raided a petco to liberate the animals: hello father

jason, released said animals on unsuspecting tourists for fun: sup old man

bruce: …nope

officer: oh, then them?

steph duke and cass, covered in equal parts confetti, dirt, and blood, waving:

bruce: oh no, im not touching that one with a ten foot pole

officer: …so it has to be one of them?

alfred, got into an altercation with someone at home goods over the last crockpot: i have no regrets master bruce

tim, hacked the cia to put himself higher than jason on their wanted list and accidentally implicated himself in an unrelated crime: i’m more disappointed in myself, really

bruce: …i’ve never met these people before

assorted incarcerated batkids: *various outraged clamor*

officer: then who are you here to collect?

bruce, pointing to a different cell, sighing: that one’s mine

clark, was pulled over for following all the gotham road laws (incredibly suspicious behavior): hi bruce!!!

[kal8elle]

Art by https://twitter.com/hokkemaruyaki