1ddiscourseoftheday

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Did everyone hear the huge news from Rome today? Yes that's right: Harry Styles popped up outside Vatican City! He was doing, you know, normal stuff: watching a shaft waiting for it to blow (...smoke obviously, what did you think you perv??), while wearing a hat reading "techno is my boyfriend." RIP Pope Francis, you would have loved saying unprintable slurs about that pairing! But will HS4 really be telling us we should be at the club, or is this just another fake relationship? Only time will tell...

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Liam was a boy, and then a man, who suffered so much trauma and pain. He was bullied as a child and then lived a nightmare that I think none of us can really imagine of having that triggering experience replicated on a literally global public scale. He became a man who inflicted trauma on others. He was an addict who was unable to find a way out of that disease, and now never will, but who was open and vulnerable about his struggles. He was an incredibly talented musician and artist and an absolutely integral part of one of the most important bands of a generation; his voice and songwriting and skill in the studio shaped every aspect of what One Direction became at their best. He loved that band and being a part of that experience with his whole being and would never have stopped celebrating what they meant to us and to the world. He had problems and did bad things; that doesn't mean he was a bad person who didn't deserve to be loved and helped to heal- everyone deserves that- and the fact that that's not something that can ever happen now is devastating. I was very distressed by many of his actions; and I cared deeply about this man I didn't know and wished for better for him than this outcome.

I'm so deeply, deeply SAD tonight. I'm sad for Liam, who will never now have the chance to look back on this hard time and reflect on how far he's come, and for Liam's family, for his parents and his sisters who loved and supported him so much, and for everyone in the 1D band family and circles. And I'm sad for us. It feels like nothing will ever be quite the same, and that's hard and sad and shocking. It's a special kind of doubled grief, to mourn the loss of the person, and also of what he meant to us in this strange world of parasocial fanning, for the real him and also for the version of him that we made up and attached so much meaning to and for the escape that brought us. For him, and also for the easy uncomplicated joy of listening to those beautiful songs from happier times, which might never feel the same again. For the other boys, who we love so much and wish we could shield from suffering and loss and pain. For our fellow fans, who we also worry about the impact of this on. Everything about this is terrible, and I am sending so much love out to all of you. We are not alone, and it's okay to feel complicated emotions and it's okay to mourn and it's okay to care about how it effects you and your life, whatever you're feeling- it's okay. We are here with you. We are 1D family.

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🐒25 Dec '22🚴‍♀️🦴

Twas the night before christmas Louis' birthday when suddenly I recalled- I sat bolt up in shock- I'd forgotten a promise to yall! It was a christmas day, you see, back in 2018, that Simon Cowell dramatically demonstrated exactly how brilliant he is when thinking things up all on his own rather than taking credit for a woman's ideas- he would be starting a new band he said, of CGI monkeys!! One of them would be modelled after Harry Styles! Sadly someone slapped him out of whatever drugged stupor led to telling the press about that brainstorm, and we never heard about it again... except from me, who had made a vow to Never Forget and to bring it up every xmas forever and ever (because I can only assume Simon would hate that.) He still hasn't learned though, just this year he hyped up an AI deepfake of himself made with that very same technology- he really just so transparently wants a band without any pesky rebellious humans in it, yikes. The fact is, the man is a clown all year every year, so may I present… a 2022 review!

Sadly, the year's biggest Cowell news was but a hoax- he did not in fact die, yet. However, he did lose a tooth, get COVID, and fall off his electric bike and end up in the hospital AGAIN, proving that ill wishes (mine) can come true to some extent! And not to worry, there's still hope for next year- apparently he still bikes around without a helmet daily. A recent TV appearance had his fans (??! sounds fake but okay) "distracted by his incredibly smooth visage"- allegedly his botox and other modifications got to the point that his son was "in hysterics" at the site of him, a clever turn of phrase that implies tears but could also mean he was laughing his ass off- me too kid, me too. Although The Sun continue to print only flattering and respectful articles- almost as if they had some kind of relationship or agreement with him?! wow this is Brand New Information- the Daily Mail definitely got the brief that tis the season for making fun of Cowell, and have been running an endless series of articles about his "many faces through the years" and "melting mug". They were denied the opportunity with his most recent TV appearance however, as he did that interview with a shadow strategically cast across himself like a low tech witness protection gambit. Perhaps, I thought, some of the issue was with the confusing and scary sounding 25 pound face masks he was reportedly doing, but it turned out that was merely an audio based misunderstanding- it was sponcon for a £25 face mask, boring.

He continues to talk up his son in interviews, bragging that the kid is a great talent spotter and he "leans on him" for opinions (that I can believe) but if you're skeptical that Simon would actually let himself be upstaged, you're quite right! Consider: he also had some things to say about what his cancelled show The X Factor would look like if it came back. The tabs report that he "is adamant that the judges should be industry insiders such as A&R people rather than artists because they are better judges of talent and less jealous of bright young artists.” Sounds like SOMEONE is jealous all right but it's not an artist judge! I think we all remember who stole the show and the hearts of multiple nations- not to mention those of scores of allegedly straight men- on the last season of TXF while spotting and nurturing the talent who went on to win it all, all while making fun of Simon at every opportunity: yes indeed, it was bright young artist and Guest Judge Louis Tomlinson! Gosh who could have seen THAT coming? Possibly the actual visionary of TXF, Nicole Scherzinger, another guest judge who upstaged Simon- most recently when footage of her forming 1D was finally released on the 10th anniversary. She said she was surprised it had survived, that she assumed he had "burned it" (to bolster his decade long lie that it was he who had had the world-changing idea.) But no, she says, in fact it was "the way that my mind grapes were working" which is, um, a very weird way of putting that, but it WORKED OUT GREAT so who am I to quibble with the way her grapejuice flows.

Meanwhile just when you thought we were free of NFT type annoyances Zayn invited us to join the metaverse, no thank you, but get that cash babe and a happy holidays to you and to all our boys: to Liam, acting like he has to make up for the few months off the radar by posting an equivalent amount of insta stories before the end of the year, to Niall, taking a break from taking over tiktok to tease about how busy he'll be next year, to Harry, dousing himself in freezing water in the UK while pap pics of him in LA were dropped, and to Louis, 31 (!!) now and hopefully with some wonderful plans over his long awaited break before another jam packed year of winning. And to all out there, a very let me be your good night and all the love!

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Those who don't simply tune out sports related tweets may have noticed an increasing number of distressed posts from Niall about his beloved lifelong football club Derby County and thought "what the hell is going on... oh whatever I don't care enough to look it up." Well that's my bat signal! I am here for you! So here ya go: the club (or team, in american parlance, but it isn't quite the same? but close enough for now) is bankrupt and in serious debt; if they do not find a buyer very soon (like, in the next 2 to 3 weeks), the entire club and team could cease to exist which would be extremely sad for Niall, an entire region of England, and kind of just in general too. Derby County are literally one of the first football teams to exist, like in the world, they were one of the 12 teams who formed the league in which they still play! They shouldn't simply cease to exist just because some shitty capitalists screwed them over!

Anyway back to the fandom, everyone's big question of the moment is: Niall is a rich guy, his favorite team needs a rich guy to step up and buy them, so if he cares so much why doesn't he just do it? The answer is, he's not THAT rich. The net worth of the club (which even in its current very depleted state is, as mentioned above, a big one) is pretty close to Niall’s entire personal net worth, and Derby's cost could be considered quite a lot more if you add in their £83 million of debt. We wouldn’t be a fandom if we didn’t stubbornly believe our faves could do anything at all, but as entertaining as team owner!Niall would be- we’re gonna have to buy a hell of a lot of Heartbreak Weather merch before it’s a realistic option for him.

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Zayn, who recently posted some new music for fans on social media without formally releasing it and may or may not be with a label currently, was in Vogue today and the article closed with this; “Malik says his next big project will be getting back in the studio to finish that much-anticipated forthcoming album. “I’m always writing and recording. I’m currently working on my next record,” he says. “I plan to release this album differently than I’ve done before, so it is exciting.” And no, there is no release date as of yet—you’ll have to keep waiting.”

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Zayn’s tweet-- “DadBod logic”- is a song rec for a rapper named Logic. It’s a song about loving being a new father and being out of the game; “Used to be up to date on that rap political shit/ But nowadays I'm up to my elbows/ And every single inch of my body in my baby's shit/ I could tell you more about diapers than modern rappers in cyphers.... Don't do hard drugs or beat my wife/ But the paparazzi still wanna start shit/ I don't answer their questions, I leave 'em in the dark, bitch...” and much much more. Guess Zayn found something about it relatable ;)

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Hey everyone- I am very sorry to have to tell you that I /the discourseoftheday blog will be going on hiatus, effective immediately. Will I be back with daily updates, you ask, and if so when? I genuinely have no idea, but I have enjoyed doing the blog a lot so it’s possible. If so I don’t know when though; could be a short time, or a long time, or maybe I’ll return in exactly 18 months just to flex on One Direction. Faith in the future? In the meantime, while the detail of the day roundups are suspended indefinitely, I expect to pop up with the occasional commentary or explainer, and lucky for you all there are loads of hardworking people scouring the internet for content and keeping the regular update accounts running on a daily basis. You’ll be fine, just remember the golden rules of figuring out what’s really going on- click through to the source or check the notes and tags for info, just google things, and if it came from tiktok or deuxmoi it’s something someone straight up made up; it might be true just by luck, but no real reason to think so.

All the love, June ‘21

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Tues 22 June ‘21

Louis tweeted Opinions about football, and a little “hope everyone has a good day” too, but one can’t help but feel that by “everyone” he meant “the England team and fans” and by “has a good day” he meant “win” but good news, they DID have a good day! So we can look forward to more pictures of Louis’ jerseys and general fanboying from him, what with the team making in through to the next stage, nice. Liam posted from in the thick of in-person Euros excitement, at Wembley for the big game- in his video he’s arriving (all masked up and hanging out with his hairstylist) and is excited because Drag Me Down happened to be playing, how cool is that? Love it! People who think Louis is in Italy with Harry now think so even more what with him seemingly choosing to just give going to the game in person a miss. Could be! Or maybe he WAS there or perhaps he’s just not comfortable being in a huge crowd of people, god knows I’m not; anyway we just do not know. Niall joined an all star roster who signed onto an artists letter taking a position against anti-LGBT legislation in the U.S. and supporting the addition of sexual orientation and gender identity (and a few other updates) to the Civil rights Act. And the Adore You video is up for two awards for excellence in ad campaigns, including one for Fan Engagement/ Community Building, plus Harry was nominated for a British LGBT+ award simply for being Harry Styles, which seems right.

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Mon 21 June ‘21

Louis checked in to see how we were (“How's everyone doing?”) and chat; he said he’s doing good, he’s “**excited” for the England game tomorrow and is watching “pretty much” every Euros match (that’s a lot!) but the “weather is shit” (“it’s England love. Rainy.”), and that he’s got the first of his two vaccine shots. He also followed Irish indie band Inhaler, who have a new album coming out pretty soon.

Bowen Yang, of Sara Lee SNL sketch fame, spoke about Harry and that piece. He talked about himself and sketch co-writer Julio Torres writing together, how they were “so easily able to write things that were just very, very, very queer, but not be concerned about it. He really taught me- and I internalized this idea- that you don’t really have to explain to the audience what this means” and Harry coming along and Yang being like well HE gets it. “The moment that I think is so important is that… Harry is just quietly flipping through it, the sketch, in my office and laughing. And I was like, OK, I think he got it. I think he’s on board. From there, I think it was all up to him,” he said, plus “he very wonderfully fought for it to go in the show, and he was just so good, and he took the note that Julio had for him: You should not be indignant; you should be like a little embarrassed and ‘sad puppy’ about it. And he took that note so well!” He DID! And he WAS just so good! What a classic… someday it’s gonna be the year like 2035 or w/e and Harry will be out and newbies in the fandom will be writing confused anons (because while the rest of the internet will be all different apps, tumblr will still be circulating the same 20 ‘heritage’ posts in the same format) like wait you’re saying the Sara Lee sketch was while he was still closeted? I don’t understand?? Bowen Yang would agree btw; here’s the interview segue to the Harry chat... “do you think Judy [gay male character of Yang’s] is a blouse? Yeah, I think he’s a blouse. So, a feminine top. Well, I was going to say that I think he is also a skilled bottom. And so I think he’s also a blouse and a flowery, billowy skirt! So speaking of Harry Styles… Yes, Harry…” WELL. Anyway our fave femme boy also won three categories in the Brazilian SEC awards including international male artist and fandom of the year.

And Niall posted to remind us to check out the stripped down Our Song- “The acoustic version of ‘Our Song‘ is special. This string arrangement!” You heard it here! We do love us some strings behind Niall’s voice, truly a winning combo.

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Sun 20 June ‘21

Happy Father’s Day- or maybe not if you’re among the many, MANY people who have reason not to find that much cause for celebration. Certainly not all of our guys feel the need to publicly engage with this holiday (in fact not one of them posted about it themselves), but there is a wee smattering of secondhand content; Gigi won by a mile with an actual picture of Zayn and Khai! He’s snuggling her and holding her in front of an illuminated globe, both of their faces mostly obscured, and she captioned it “Our Khai is so lucky to have a baba who loves her so much & does anything to see her smile!! @zayn Happy first Father’s Day, I’m so grateful for all the lil bits of her that are you.” Aside from that, siblings coming through; Niall’s brother posted an (old) picture of them with their dad, and Austin Clark posted a pic with Freddie labeled “lil bro,” HAHA.

Deuxmoi said Niall is in New York, but was that his girlfriend Amelia’s hand seen on (London based) Horan cousin Deo’s insta story seductively massaging a chicken carcass? <whatisthetruth.gif>

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Sat 19 June ‘21

Niall and Louis tweeted about football (“keep the faith!”- Louis’ ability to be over the top inspirational about pretty mundane events remains unparalleled) and LOUIS USED AN EMOJI stop the presses when was the last time we saw that, WHAT IS THIS 2015 (my ability to overreact to mundane events also remains intact TYVM!) Niall, not so dramatic as Louis and myself but definitely not shy with the emoji use, simply felt that today’s match was a “proper game of football,” but emphasized that with an exploding head emoji.

Liam boxed in the great outdoors (and we got video) and Hugo posted cute father’s day content about him and his dad- he answers some yes/ no questions about their relationship, somewhat astonishingly choosing ‘no’ for the question of whether they’d ever gone to a concert together. I guess he doesn’t count ones he’s played?

Harry Lambert said “I never want it to feel like he’s wearing a costume, I never want to feel like something is wearing him. We’re not doing it for lols — it should feel like part of the performance or part of the whole, you know?” and “it’s always been, it sounds cheesy to say, heavenly” about dressing Harry, and lots more pics of Harry definitely not wearing a costume (or much of anything) in Italy were posted.

Eleanor followed up yesterday’s post of her “watching the football game with Louis” aka the biggest most obvious blunder she’s made since… well, last time, with another hilarious nod at the fact that they never actually see each other except when they’re getting pics taken for public consumption… and possibly not even then! In the footie post Louis could be heard in the background but despite the emojis which, well there is literally no other way to understand them but as suggesting they were watching the game, the footage was definitively, indisputably, without any question or doubt, identifiable as being from when they went to Nizam’s wedding last month, ie the only time they’ve hung out in months and months. LMAO WHOOPS. Not QUITE as good but definitely on the same theme IMO, she then posted a throwback to being in Ibiza dated August 2019. That was a very brief stay there her and Louis allegedly enjoyed after his festival appearance- but the only pics of them from it were at the airport in LONDON when she got back, causing many to wonder if Louis was ever there at all (my kind of throwback, love remembering that, hilarious!) The fact that he isn’t in the pic she posted today certainly won’t change any minds about that, and if she had pics of him there it sure seems like she’d be using them today…

And in (even more) fandom discourse news, author Kaitlyn Tiffany is back if anyone wants to block her; I guess she had just privated her blog for a bit, not deleted. Do it now is my advice. I hope she’s enjoying coming up with ways to explain why Eleanor is pretending that old footage was current when her and Louis oBviOUslY live together and see each other every day, but perhaps she’s a fan of the UA that helpfully explained that Eleanor posted that hotel footage “to show how she feels about football,” HAHAHA WHAT. This is about the level of analysis I expect from her upcoming book so it would be fitting...

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Fri 18 June ‘21

Louis cheered on England- he posted ANOTHER vintage England jersey (that’s one we’ve seen him wear) and a pretty straightfoward “COME ON ENGLAND!!!” Then he continued his animal naming suggestion streak- cause yes who wouldn’t want to name their cat Gareth! (Pretty sure he’s referencing England team manager Gareth Southgate here.) Anyway even the official UEFA account wanted more Louis then that, and got him to make a score prediction- “2-0 England” he said, loyal as can be, and the official England account weighed in appreciate the positivity. Well he was half right anyway; the final score was 0-0.

Liam, with some kind of Lonely Bug swag in the background tucked in next to his toaster and other kitchen stuff, showed us where his new house’s ceiling is leaking, oh NO, and complained that so far it does not seem that blonds have more fun. But he did post video WITH BEAR (“Father’s day has started”), that’s super rare! Bear remains unseen but you can hear him off camera, which Liam keeps on himself; they’re talking cookies and toys.

Our Song acoustic is out! “WOW I love this song so much!!! We stripped it back to how the song started. Just guitar and two voices. Hope you enjoy x” said Niall. His golf company has also signed on to support the English under 18 championships which will “see boys and girls competing together for the first time, in the same championship, for a single trophy,” so I’m sure we’ll be hearing more about that.

Meanwhile Harry posed sexily under an outdoor shower in Italy.

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Thurs 17 June ‘21

Liam posted video from his run this morning, with pal Conor and a picture of… his new blond hair?! It’s TRUE, he really did it!! None of this Niall business (see below), when Liam teases a thing he goes right ahead and DOES THAT THING, love that for us. He said, “after such an incredible day with the art launch I felt the courage,” and “I was very nervous but I love it,” and “discord chat made me do it,” haha. Remembering him talking about wanting to bleach his hair in the past but being told he wasn’t allowed by management, this is a happy day! Go Liam. Fans flipped and his blond hair trended and Liam posted a shirtless blond bedtime video to say thanks for all the love.

And as for that art launch, well: continuing the ongoing theme of me being confused about Liam’s NFTs (I do like to be consistent) I guess he DID post all of it for us to see SORRY I thought those were previews or something? I DON’T KNOW I’M SORRY MY BAD. You would really think they would have made a bigger deal about that? Well; there was a lot going on. Anyway so the different ones ARE posted to his insta (or uh copies of them which is a whole thorny philosophical debate isn’t it, whether copies are or aren’t different than the versions one can own, it all depends on your view of NFTs) but ANYWAY we CAN see the Lonely Bug content and it’s poignant and very pretty honestly. The one of the bug trying and failing to rest while camera shutters and flashes click continuously in the background especially is really intense. APOLOGIES LIAM for my mistake, ugh.

Niall is making rash promises for if Our Song hits number one, only this time for Anne Marie instead of himself- he said she’d do a “live sky dive on tiktok”! Promises promises, but it was Ashe who gave the fans the content we want today; she not only posted shirtless Niall video to celebrate 1 year of their collab version of Moral of the Story, but also goofy rehearsal footage and, my personal favorite, Niall with an American accent impersonating a news anchor reporting on election returns! LOL. Anne Marie had a pretty competitive offer, saying Niall would get a TATTOO (live on tiktok) but that was simply too much to even kid about for Niall- “Ok jokes over. Just a number 1 would be nice,” he said.

And a ‘For Your Emmys Consideration’ ad uses a picture of Harry’s Grammys performance which raises all kinds of fascinating questions- would it be a special kind of EGOT if someone got the Emmy for getting a Grammy?? Way to streamline the process if that was what was going on, but sad news, the Emmy would actually go to Ben Winston for the broadcast, not to Harry: ugh. Liam, who unlike me actually likes Ben Winston, commented on the post “love this… my two guys couldn’t be more proud”, and Niall liked the post.

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Wed 16 June ‘21

My Policeman shooting is WRAPPED, for real this time it seems; both the book’s author and Emma Corrin said so, plus Harry was seen leaving Venice. Emma posted some real cute set pics with Harry and others (and edited herself into the end of shoot pics from Venice, HA). As mentioned, Harry was seen wrapping up his stay in Venice, and I do mean SEEN- with a huge crowd of fans on hand there are about one million pics of him loading his bags onto the boat and being motored away. He waved to the crowds and said hi and all that, and took a couple close up fan pics (but how did those particular fans out of so many get so lucky? by breaking into his hotel grounds, that’s how :/) and signed (and dated) some stuff. He looked real cute in white trousers and shoes and a very cool vintage-y shirt with his beloved blue bandana sticking out of the shirt pocket. Also in his hotel (but as paying guests, one assumes), Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry- Harry was seen hanging out in the hotel restaurant with them and playing with their wee tiny baby!

The Lonely Bug NFT sales are also a wrap (I think?? Still vague on the fine details of many parts of this operation...) At the very least we know that the fanciest of Liam’s 6 NFT packages (which included the dinner invite and other things) concluded its auction and it went for $122k! We don’t get to see Liam’s live reaction to the final number though, as that video was one of the things they were selling as an exclusive, but Liam posted a little video thanking everyone for everything throughout the big sale. He seems happy but anticlimactic for us huh? Will the big spenders who now own the art and rights to it show us more or simply hoard it like intangible toilet paper in a theoretical pandemic, I guess only time will tell. Whether or not they share, we certainly haven’t heard the last of the Lonely Bug hype, as they will be adding more extras for the buyers of the tokens they sold and so forth, including possibly selling toys of the bug according to Liam.

A preview of the stripped back version of Our Song (“where it all started”) was posted and much hyping up of the Friday release of it by Niall and Anne Marie is happening, including a contest to win handwritten lyrics to the song (handwritten by WHOM? It does not say; it does say deep in the rules that Anne Marie will sign the 5 copies which I feel like they should have led with but maybe that would spoil the vague-but-unstated-for-legal-reasons suggestion that perhaps, just maybe, her and Niall wrote them. Well let’s hope they’ve found an intern with nice handwriting I guess.)