a-mnhia - Tumblr blog

[a-mnhia]

THIS BLOG HAS BEEN ARCHIVED,    you can find me over at @mnhia​

[a-mnhia]

THIS BLOG HAS BEEN ARCHIVED,    you can find me over at @mnhia​

[a-mnhia]

THIS BLOG HAS BEEN ARCHIVED,    you can find me over at @mnhia​

[a-mnhia]

she

for halloween mina is dressing up as persephone but specifically persephone from the ww comics : )

[a-mnhia]

for halloween mina is dressing up as persephone but specifically persephone from the ww comics : )

[a-mnhia]

a wild card appears

[a-mnhia]

a wild card appears

[a-mnhia]

hey guys,  i apologize for having to ask for help but with how things are in florida right now,  we’re really struggling.  i’m a trans & disabled he/him lesbian working in pharmacy,  my wife is a lesbian working in healthcare.   we have $7 left until friday in cash,  and then this is our current bank balance because of them charging us a late fee on our rent with hurricane ian.   we have to pay our electric and water bill combo which is now past-due.  i am still suffering with this respiratory illness ( which we think is covid now, due to the length of it messing up my lungs ) and our rent is going up $250 in november/the end of our lease,  so we’re struggling to find another place to live in 15 days and food is just absolutely ridiculous ( two lb of ground meat,  for example,  is almost thirty dollars at winn dixie ).  I can handle the food part with the new food bank that opened up, but we really need help with our electric bill. 

if anyone can help us, i’m more than prepared to make graphics in the style of headers,  promos,  dash icons and icon borders.  as this stands,  when we get paid on friday its going to eat the entire cheque, leaving us with no food,  no power and likely when rent rolls around on the third,  no place to live. 

if anyone can help,  please donate to $my wife’s cashapp,  $kaylamundsen,  or their paypal, which is here,  and let me know what sort of graphics you want.  i can  get a head start on them as soon as i am feeling a margin better and the coughing starts to subside.  if you can’t donate, please consider sharing this post.   i apologize again for having to ask for help.   hurricane ian really set us back in ways that we need help to recover from,  and neither of our families are supportive in our relationship and will help us on that account.

[a-mnhia]

hey guys,  i apologize for having to ask for help but with how things are in florida right now,  we’re really struggling.  i’m a trans & disabled he/him lesbian working in pharmacy,  my wife is a lesbian working in healthcare.   we have $7 left until friday in cash,  and then this is our current bank balance because of them charging us a late fee on our rent with hurricane ian.   we have to pay our electric and water bill combo which is now past-due.  i am still suffering with this respiratory illness ( which we think is covid now, due to the length of it messing up my lungs ) and our rent is going up $250 in november/the end of our lease,  so we’re struggling to find another place to live in 15 days and food is just absolutely ridiculous ( two lb of ground meat,  for example,  is almost thirty dollars at winn dixie ).  I can handle the food part with the new food bank that opened up, but we really need help with our electric bill. 

if anyone can help us, i’m more than prepared to make graphics in the style of headers,  promos,  dash icons and icon borders.  as this stands,  when we get paid on friday its going to eat the entire cheque, leaving us with no food,  no power and likely when rent rolls around on the third,  no place to live. 

if anyone can help,  please donate to $my wife’s cashapp,  $kaylamundsen,  or their paypal, which is here,  and let me know what sort of graphics you want.  i can  get a head start on them as soon as i am feeling a margin better and the coughing starts to subside.  if you can’t donate, please consider sharing this post.   i apologize again for having to ask for help.   hurricane ian really set us back in ways that we need help to recover from,  and neither of our families are supportive in our relationship and will help us on that account.

[a-mnhia]

activity update

on monday,   i will be starting a new job ( yay! )    while it will only be a part - time position,   i will be starting classes up at the beginning of novemeber ( also yay! )   because of this my time spent specifically on the dash will be limited.   in light of this,    i will marketing my blog as slow to reply and will also be moving to a queue - based system within the next month as i begin to navigate my new time schedule   ( working on writing when i have dedicated time and then letting my queue publish those replies during the week. )   this decision will have no direct impact on threads or plotting.   i will still be available on dis.cord outside of work hours.   if you have any specific questions,   feel free to reach out to me!

[a-mnhia]

activity update

on monday,   i will be starting a new job ( yay! )    while it will only be a part - time position,   i will be starting classes up at the beginning of novemeber ( also yay! )   because of this my time spent specifically on the dash will be limited.   in light of this,    i will marketing my blog as slow to reply and will also be moving to a queue - based system within the next month as i begin to navigate my new time schedule   ( working on writing when i have dedicated time and then letting my queue publish those replies during the week. )   this decision will have no direct impact on threads or plotting.   i will still be available on dis.cord outside of work hours.   if you have any specific questions,   feel free to reach out to me!

[a-mnhia]

Saint Catherine, After Bernardino Luini c. 1510

[a-mnhia]

nobody asked me but if mina was to pull a tarot card she would pull the eight of swords.

[a-mnhia]

same thing,   different font.

[a-mnhia]

It All Checks Out

[a-mnhia]

drusilla saying  ‘ i want to be good...i want to be pure! ’  and mina saying  ‘ unclean!  unclean!  even the almighty shuns me! ’  are the same thing.

[a-mnhia]

NOSFEROT ,     the count.​

            ‘  the lord?  …  so,  you would beseech God on behalf of the bloodshed you sought.   but hark,  allow me to correct you!   for you speak as though you are but a maiden trapped in the fields of wanton war.  ’      was she not the mastermind?    it was ms. mina that had been the brains of that entire outfit,  tracing back the fabled past lay hidden in his letters and in the diaries he could not read.    a sort of secret code that had unearthed his vile treachery and the cruelty to her husband.    but god was not there with her.     He was not within her church waging some holy war upon the creatures of romania.  for were they not his too?   He was meant to be merciful.  He was meant to be good.  was that not why the count had thus laid his life down for Him?   had been a brutal sacrifice,  a martyr for His cause,  against the tyranny of the king?     ‘  god is not here with you,  my dear,  mrs. harker.   he left us both to die far too long ago.   ’

a great,  deep music was repetitively pounding from some unknown place below.  dull and muffled,  it rose up like heat,  too distant to be felt.  a stifled, beastly heartbeat that rattled random torches here and there, and that filled the confined chamber with no melody of its own.  it seemed not to distract or disorient the count,  who standing before those windows,  made no move to gather ms. mina from the place where she’d been frozen.  instead they looked upon her,  locked their eyes with hers so she would feel the way he burned.

‘   …  still,  you speak as though you are expected to draw a sword.  what do you think i might do,  miss mina,  to exact my just revenge?  is it the dark that you fear most,  or the fate of poor miss lucy that you could not hope to stay?  ’     it was the count,  however,  that struggled to remember the prick of his teeth against her swollen throat.  the scent of that red hair that was as tempting as the fox.   but there was the memory of mina      half-kneeling in her bedsheets with the vampire’s breast ripped and left to bleed      threatening to swallow him whole.  

he spoke again with that soothing voice,  calm and void of anger.   ‘  but what if it was my wish to simply let you go?  to go back to those four heathens that you love and hold so dear?  to send you back to england with the knowledge of my threat.  to know that it is not so mighty as your predecessors thought,  and that one day it will be sieged and brought as low as those you conquered?           what if i want you to live with that nightmare,  my darling wilhelmina,  the way that i live with mine? ’

mina was not a monster.    misguided?    perhaps.     cunning?    more than she would care to admit.    but she was not a monster,    even in her transgressions.    all she had done,    all she had tried to do was to end his reign of terror upon the lives of those she loved,   upon her very own soul.    was that a sin so fowl as to incur not only the wrath of the count,    but the absence of the almighty himself?

yet he was right.     god had left her,     just as the men she had sworn her love had done.     abandoned at the mouth of hell to face what demons she had conjured of her own accord.   ( unclean.    wretched,    unclean thing. )    this was to be where she belonged.    sculpted in the very image of that which she had tried to resist for so long.    and yet,    in the den of lucifer himself,    her sins were considered too great and she was to be cast out once more.

“   you could let me go.   send me away as you have called me here.   let me live out the rest of my days in fear of you,   of what i have done.   ”     the thought of it brought terror to her breast.      to leave this place without a clear answer of what was to come.     to take the men she loved away with her back to the safety of england’s shores to wallow in self - pity.   for what was to keep him from returning a year later,   five years,   ten?    they were mortal,    all of them  ( god willing ).   he was eternal.    he did not age as they did.   he did not wither and decay.   he could come to them,   to her.     or he could not.

was it then that she was to be like cain:     marked and made to wander to the earth for all eternity without rest or retribution?   for surely that was what he called her to now until death.

“   but then i would die.   and this nightmare,   all of this will be but a dream.    ”      how beautiful the thought!    she would not be cain.   she would find peace in death,   in the arms of her beloved,    in the heaven that waited for her.   she would be made pure in the eyes of god once more.     but for him,    what was there?    her eyes depart his for but a moment,    fixing on some point beyond,    perhaps from where the music swelled,    as if to compose herself.        “   ...   yet,    would that not take away any comfort you have from my going?   for you will live eternally knowing what you have lost while my torment will be over.   ”         they felt so sweet,    the words that left her.    pitying,     almost as if her heart broke for him.    only a monster would be able to say such things and feel nothing,   and mina was not a monster.

“    in the end,   it is you who will live that nightmare.   for no matter what you do to me or anyone else,   you will always carry it with you.   nothing you do will ever bring back what you’ve lost.   ”