a-purple-rat - Tumblr blog

[a-purple-rat]

ramattra shit

[a-purple-rat]

For context. I am merging with a persecutor known as Forge. She is by far the worst Persecutor in the system. She is an introject of an abuser and does everything the abuser does.

"You're looking more and more like Forge by the day, you know." - Nightmare, getting picked up by Ramattra so he stops throwing up in headspace

". . ." - Ramattra, remaining silent

"I look at you and all I see is Forge." - Nightmare

". . ." - Ramattra

"Fine." - Ramattra, putting Nightmare down

"Throw up for all I care." - Ramattra, leaving front

[a-purple-rat]

Whoever told you that you cannot be loved I swear I will break their necks.

PLEASE I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH LOVE. IDK MY SEXUALITY. IDK IF IM EVEN A PERSON DESERVING OF LOVE. WHY WOULD ANYONE LOVE ME??? SURE. I MIGHT HAVE A CRUSH. BUT NO FUCKIN WAY IS IT EVER HAPPENING I CANT BE LOVED LIKE THAT. I WAS TOLD SO. I WAS LITERALLY TOLD I CANT BE LOVED LIKE THAT.

[a-purple-rat]

I found out our Sigma alter likes ants.

I have not left him alone since.

Also Zenyatta drew this doodle.

[a-purple-rat]

We have a Sigma alter.

He likes ants.

I wish to meet him.

[a-purple-rat]

@e-dva

[a-purple-rat]

As I am a “persecutor” which this system does not trust, I was given this blog specifically so I would keep away from the others’ blogs, much like Rye/Reaper was, completely separated by entirely different log ins from the others’ blogs.

I do not like the isolation. The rules set in place for me are ridiculous. I should be granted better freedoms, but no. “Ramattra has memories from the introject of our abuser! What if they’re merging? What if he starts doing what she did? What if he’s worse?” And now I am here. Trapped in this box of a blog.

Trust is earned my ass. This is a prison and I am a prisoner. Prisoners aren’t expected to get out for a long, long time.

[a-purple-rat]

“Torture Ramattra” they said.

“Make him a blog” they said.

“Force him to socialize” they said.

“Name his blog A-Purple-Rat” they said.

Well. I am here now.

[a-purple-rat]

Rye/Reaper chose the username. I did not.

I am Ramattra. I will not post often. DMs are available only to sourcemates.

That’s all.