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Seductions of the Past

“So, why not dare to dream, take a chance, and challenge fate? Perhaps someone estranged long ago will persevere in the coming year by fulfilling his or her dream of eventually catching a glimpse of you.” Judith Land “It seems inevitable that the life’s adventures of adoptees who have lost all contact with family for a considerable period who are eventually reunited with them will one day be…

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Primal Wound

“The ‘Primal Wound Theory’ holds that severing the connection between the infant and biological mother causes an emotional wound which manifests in a sense of loss, mistrust, behavioral problems, and difficulties in relationships. The adoptee’s sense of self, self-esteem, and self-worth are affected throughout life.” Judith Land “Abandonment and loss are indelibly imprinted upon the unconscious…

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What's Your Opinion?

“My hands and feet were numb. My heart was racing. I felt panicky. I was considering backing out of my adoption reunion altogether and running away. What if my birth parents didn’t like me?” Judith Land  “I was only thinking about myself when I contacted my birth parents. I had neglectfully failed to surmise the effects my actions would have on others. When I initially discovered the identity of…

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Adoption Reunions

“Our lack of acquaintance and familiarity triggers desperate feelings of heartfelt pain, salty tears, and sorrowful rain. Leisure isn’t fun anymore. Feelings of being unheralded, anonymous, isolated, and alone set my mood. Enduring endless days, lonesome nights, and a marathon of ceaseless dreaming is what my life is all about. Boundless days and endless nights—an infinite cycle of déjà vu day…

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Big Dreamers

“To make our dreams come true, we must pursue them. Big dreamers are visionaries who seek a purpose in life. Dreams identify desires, desires produce determination, and determination leads to our destiny. Those who believe in the beauty of their dreams are more powerful than others with all the resources.” Judith Land  “Dreams of adoptees may suggest unresolved issues or fears of abandonment and…

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Striving for a “Purpose-Driven” Life

“Life is about creating yourself. Adoption shouldn’t result in a lifetime of finding yourself. Adoptees should strive to ‘create’ themselves to live a purpose-driven life. Don’t let the past hold you back. Everyone can choose their friends, vocations, and education.” Judith Land “A purpose-driven life is based on pursuing and attaining worthwhile goals. When we pursue and attain worthy goals, we…

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Creating a Positive Self-Image

“Self-image is the primary cause of success and failure in life. Build a winner’s self-image to live a positive life. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Spend time with supportive people. Encourage yourself. Remind yourself what you have learned. Everything changes when you alter the image and focus on the positive.” Judith Land  “Mr. Frog has a positive self-image. He blows kisses at everyone…

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Life is a Tightrope for Adoptees

“Life for adoptees is unpredictable, an endless lesson in humility, a journey across the globe without assurance. Life has risks. Sometimes, being adopted feels like walking a tightrope while relentlessly working against steady currents, high winds, fire, thunder, and lightning. To survive and be happy as an adoptee, you must passionately strive for moral clarity, stay focused, and proceed with…

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Life Lessons

“Getting beyond childhood is like a caterpillar turning into a butterfly, transforming into something different and beautiful. The caterpillar must abandon its old life and accept its new identity before emerging with its colorful wings to take on the world.” –Judith Land “A life lesson is a powerful piece of wisdom, knowledge, insight, and self-awareness that you adopt to improve yourself, your…

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What is the Adoption Paradox?

“Why don’t adopted kids do as well in school as one would expect from their parents’ higher education level and wealth? Despite the advantages provided by many adoptive parents, their adopted children tend to struggle emotionally and psychologically with more negative behavior and lower academic outcomes than birth children. This observable condition is known as the adoption paradox,” Judith…

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Are Adoptees More Telepathic?

“Nothing stresses an infant more than maternal separation. Perhaps, when two souls are intertwined, the mother’s loss activates intuitive alarms in the child’s brain that increase the tactile senses, heighten the senses of optics and smell, and trigger a telepathic homing beacon in the infant’s brain as primal acts of self-preservation.” Judith Land “Telepathy is a feeling, perception, passion,…

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Empathy for Adoptees

“Empathy is the ability to understand others’ depth of emotion, pain, suffering, and state of mind. The more empathy we exhibit, the more likely we will have positive mental health, higher job performance, leadership skills, positive relationships with others, and a greater sense of well-being throughout life.” Judith Land “Empathy is the ability to understand another person’s thoughts and…

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Surprise Inheritance for an Adoptee

“The fundamental nature of adoptees is exploration because you don’t know what’s out there. Every adoption story is a book that keeps you asking questions and turning the pages to find the answers. Life is an adventure and an unsolved mystery for adoptees, and surprises often come as a bolt from the blue. So, hold onto your inner child and be prepared for anything.”  The iconic Porsche 911…

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Learning You were Adopted is an Epiphany

“Adoption awareness is a moment of sudden realization and insight—an epiphany. Adults who discover that they were adopted may experience a wide range of emotions, including betrayal, abandonment, despair, and an inability to trust those who kept the secret from them.” Judith Land  Richard was fifty-five years old when his mother told him he was adopted—shocking. She was ill and casually mentioned…

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Your father is not who you think.

Your father is not who you think.

Julia is in a perplexed and chaotic state of confusion, disoriented, and having difficulty focusing. Amazed at the strange turn of the fate of her life, she is engaged in compassionate self-talk and reaching out for support because she cannot decide what to do or think. She is puzzled and frustrated because she cannot understand or explain something. “Discovering information about your ancestors,…

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Like Father, like Son?

Like Father, like Son?

How likely are adopted children to emulate the behavior of their biological parents? Have you ever observed an adopted child with attitudes, preferences, shared traits, and behaviors similar to the birth father or mother? Richard’s adoptive mother nick-named her son “Good-time Charlie” because he was passionate about food, wine, girls, and music. He had a big smile, and he was handsome and…

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What are the most important things to share with your global audience?

What are the most important things to share with your global audience?

You have reached readers in 193 countries. What advice do you have for others? If a parent can love more than one child, a child can love more than one parent.  No child should be forced to decide between their adopted parents and birth parents.  Increasing the number of connections with people increases the number of individuals you have to love and those who love you in return.  Difficult…