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alasitsearwax · 5 years ago

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Aludra | Prologue|

Copyright © 2017 by Jahleesa J. Thornhill. All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

SUNDAY 2nd NOVEMBER, 1981

MALFOY MANOR

____________

It was night, and darkness shrouded the corridors of Malfoy Manor. Only the dim flicker of candles mounted on the occasional coffee table or bookshelf provided some form of warmth to the cold mansion. From the master bedroom, two hissing voices conversed quietly, but the venom behind their tones bounced off the stone walls and settled bitterly.

"She cannot stay here, Narcissa," said Lucius Malfoy.

"She's my sister’s child, Lucius! Where else do you expect her to go?"

His wife, Narcissa, was barely a woman of twenty-two, yet it seemed many years of pain and disappointment had aged itself onto her face already. Her brown eyes swam with tears as she glared at her husband defiantly.

"Send her to live with that other sister of yours!"

"That bloodtraitor? Lucius!"

He pinched the bridge of his nose and gritted his teeth; it was clear that for once, his wife would not wordlessly agree with him, and this infuriated him.

"Narcissa, The Dark Lord is gone! We must make a better name for ourselves, for Draco! How are we supposed to do that when the daughter of Bellatrix Lestrange lives under our roof?" he demanded.

Narcissa all but shrieked with outrage at his words. "How dare you? We are no better than Bella! We've killed people, too - !" Narcissa began, but Lucius was quick to cut her off.

"Yes, but it’s not exactly public knowledge what we’ve done! Your sister is rotting away in Azkaban, and the entire Wizarding world knows of her crimes. We’re lucky they didn’t throw us in there with her!" he yelled.

Suddenly, a baby's cry could be heard and Narcissa was out of the bedroom and across the hall, Lucius hot on the hem of her long nightgown. She briskly walked into the nursery and leaned over one of the two oak cribs in the room. Her nimble arms reached inside the cot a lifted out a red-faced baby.

"Now, now, Draco. No need to cry, Mummy's here." Narcissa whispered, gently bouncing him and calming his wails to small hiccups.

"That child, our son, is my concern, Narcissa." Lucius said forcefully. "Think of Draco,"

"Who are you to suggest I don’t care for my baby?" Narcissa whispered angrily, trying not to startle Draco. "I will protect both of them with my life. Your family is fine, Lucius, but both of my sisters are gone! My parents - gone! I’ve lost too much to this god forsaken war, and I’ll be damned before I just toss her to the side!”

Hot tears spilled onto Narcissa’s cheeks as she watched Lucius’ face contort and redden with rage. A broken plea left her lips. "My love...please...just look at her..."

Lucius grumbled and spun around to look into the crib where the other child lay in peaceful slumber, narrowing his cold eyes in scrutiny. Long black lashes brushed her rosy cheeks and a layer of dark fuzz adorned her head. Soft breaths passed between her pink lips. As much as Lucius wanted her gone, he could not deny that she was a beautiful, if not an angelic, child.

"Who else is to know but us?" Narcissa said. "We haven’t left this house since Draco was born. We’ll say she was an unexpected twin and terribly ill, so much so that we didn’t want to announce her arrival, out of fear she wouldn’t live for long. What are they going to do, call us liars?”

"And when she finds out we’re not her parents?" Lucius questioned, his back still turned to Narcissa. She shook her head.

"She won't. Bella..." Narcissa swallowed and took a deep breath. "Bellatrix has life in Azkaban...the baby will never know who her real mother is, let alone meet her."

She lowered Draco back into his crib as she continued. "We’ll raise them as brother and sister - a son and a daughter, Lucius, didn’t you always want that? - and they’ll attend Hogwarts together. It’s the right thing to do.”

For a few tense seconds, Lucius was silent. He gazed down at the sleeping baby and he noticed some distinct similarities between the child and his wife, like the arch of their eyebrows and the shape of their lips. It would make up for he fact that he looked nothing like the girl in the slightest.

"Fine. You win, Narcissa," Lucius sighed. Narcissa's smile lit up the dark room and she stepped around her husband to plant a sweet kiss on his lips.

"Thank you, thank you. I love you," she said. Lucius muttered something unintelligeable under his breath. Narcissa watched her sleeping niece affectionately, her heart swelling with joy and pride.

"Sweet dreams, Aludra."

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alasitsearwax · 5 years ago

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Aludra | A Harry Potter Fan Fiction | SUMMARY

Hi all! So I wrote this story and published it on Wattpad way back in like 2016, and I’ve been meaning to rewrite it, seeing as my writing’s matured a lot since then. Y’all ever look at your old work and cringe so hard you consider deleting it altogether? Yeah, well I didn’t wanna do that, so here I am. All parts will be available on my page. Enjoy!

_____________________________

[BOOK 1]

"She cannot stay here, Narcissa,"

"She's my sister’s child, Lucius! Where else do you expect her to go?"

"Send her to live with that other sister of yours!"

"The bloodtraitor? Lucius!"

Lucius pinched the bridge of his nose and gritted his teeth; he could tell that for once, his wife would not wordlessly agree with him. For once, she had a mind of her own.

"Narcissa, The Dark Lord is gone! We must make a better name for ourselves, for Draco! How are we supposed to do that when the daughter of Bellatrix Lestrange living under our roof?"

___________

Aludra Malfoy inherited many traits from her mother's side, the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. Dark, curly hair, brown eyes and impeccable intelligence. But her Legilimens...?

It's Aludra’s first year at Hogwarts, and there are already so many expectations she has to meet; get sorted into Slytherin, befriend only the children of the Sacred Twenty-Eight and achieve academic excellence. Aludra’s determined to prove herself, but when she’s suddenly exposed to a new environment and new people away from the watchful eyes of her parents, she find herself wondering if her family’s values are something she truly wishes to uphold.

FACE CLAIM

Lilla Crawford as Aludra Malfoy

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Connor: *breaks Hanks window in the middle of the night*

Connor: I have a - please stop screaming Lieutenant - I have a question ‘Can I pet Sumo?’

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Detroit: Become Human Masterlist

Detroit Become Human Imagines

Connor

Tricks and Talents Peace Falling Falling Pt 2 Goner Guilt Thirst Parched (Thirst Pt 2) Alone Tears Hi-Fail Feelings Stay (Feelings Ending 1) Siren (Platonic) Lucky Day Close (M!Reader) Family (Trans Reader) Deviate (Feelings Ending 2) Expectancy Accidents Break In the Dark [NSFW] Quenched (Thirst Pt 3) [NSFW] {AFAB Reader} Quenched (Thirst Pt 3) [NSFW] {AMAB Reader} Walk Winter You Are My Fire

Markus

Weight Spares

Kara

Ice

Luther

N/A

Hank

Siren (Platonic)

Simon

Luminous Words

Daniel

Help Blue (Help Pt 2) Fluster (Help Pt 3) Coping

RK800-60 (Colin)

Not Connor Replica Favours (Replica Pt. 2) [NSFW]

RK900 (Conan)

Unstable Secret Interesting (Unstable Pt 2) Jump For My Love

Detroit Become Human Headcannons/Reactions

Connor

Reacting to an S/O w/ a child Reacting to S/O w/ a hiccuping fit

Kara

Falling in Love

Ralph

Relationship Headcannons

Chloe

Relationship Headcannons

Detroit Become Human Playlists

Connor x Reader

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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To protect you (part 1)

Infos :

Connor x fem!reader

words : around 2,3k

Summary :

A man you sent in jail some months ago because of some red Ice traffic just escaped. There is only one problem : he promised he would find you and would make you pay for it. For your protection, Hank decided to assign you his partner Connor - and you still don’t know how to react with all of this.

(Sooo, here the first part of this short story ! There will be probably three parts. Like always, english is not my first language so sorry if there is some mistakes, don’t hesitate to contact me by PM to correct them :))

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 1

“You don’t have to do this, Hank,” you insisted with a little frown at the corner of your mouth. “I am perfectly able to protect myself and handle this.”

“You know that he is an important man in all this traffic stuff,” Hank replied. “He probably have some people under his orders. It will be safer for you this way.”

At the sight of your raised eyebrows, he added :

“Don’t act like a child, (Y/n). You know I am doing this for you. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

A little sigh escaped your lips.

“I know Hank, I’m sorry. It’s just that…”

“You are incomfortable having Connor at your home, right ?” the lieutenant guessed.

“Well… You know I never wanted an android in my life or at home. I don’t want someone else doing all the tasks for me, I am capable to handle it myself.”

Hank rolled his eyes at you like you said some shitty joke - well, it probably seemed like a joke to him.

“I’m not telling you to ask him to do your laundry!” He sounded almost offended that you can think about his partner like that and a chuckle escaped your lips. “Its just in case, until we catch this asshole again to put him back in jail.”

“I get it.” you replied with a light smile.

Hank suddenly raised his head and looked behind you and you can’t help but turn, watching the famous android coming near you two. He gave a cup of coffee to the lieutenant and greeted both of you :

“Hank, (Y/n).

You can’t stop yourself from rising a brow at the sight of the coffee and you whispered to Hank :

"Not doing my laundry, huh ? But I guess a cup of coffee is okay ?”

“Shut the fuck up, (Y/n)” he only said, and you started to laugh at his grumpy face.

Turning back to the android, you found him watching the two of you with what looked like curiosity in his eyes. He was staring a lot since you knew him, and you eventually grew used to it - even if sometimes, it was really way too long to not by noticed - it was strange, really. Since you were being reassigned at Detroit, you started to work with them two, and that was the hell of a journey. Between the grumpy side of Hank and his alcohol, and Connor and his I-don’t-have-any-emotion sort of talk, it was… kinda exhausting, sometimes - but still funny, in a way. After the shitty partners you always ended with in your previous police station, you felt relieved.

“Did Hank told you about this…protection job for me ?” you asked to the android.

“Yes, we talked about it this morning when you were doing paperwork. You don’t have to worry, I will protect you until we catch the guy.”

A smile on your lips, you joked :

“I am counting on you. If someone kill me and you fail this, my mom is gonna run at you to strangle you.”

Hank started to sneer in his coffee cup and you acted like you didn’t saw it while Connor said :

“If it help your mom feeling better, I would be glad, but I can’t die of stangulat-”

“ I know ! Uh, that was just a joke.”

Damn, was it so difficult for him to understand this ? Or maybe it was you - yeah, you had a shitty sense of humor, after all.

“Oh, I didn’t see it was this late ! I have to go buy some food for tonight.”

You waved your hand at the lieutenant before leaving, Connor following you without a word - yeah, it was going to be strange for you.

__________

“How do you find the place?”

The android looked around. Your apartment was at the last floor because you needed a little greenhouse, but the rest was cute too : you got only one bedroom and a kitchen open to the living room. Everything was in colors of soft brown and green, and all the furniture were made of wood. You were someone who liked nature, after all.

“If I compare to the data about human houses, its lovely”.

You frowned at this answer. Obviously, it was a typical android answer, and it strangely crushed your heart.

“I don’t ask about data. I want your own point of view on this.”

The RK800 looked lost for a moment before his LED started to light up in yellow and he finally said :

“I think… it looks calm. Almost peaceful, it suits you.”

You smiled at the android - it was far better than having to hear about the stupid data.

“You should go to the greenhouse on the balcony, its the last door right here.” you said as you pointed the said door with a finger. For a human, it was difficult to notice it because the door was in the same oak color than the wall, but he perfectly noticed it and listened to you, going to open it.

Taking this time for you, you headed to the small spot in your kitchen with a hot cholocate in mind. Screw Hank and his coffee, milk and chocolate were far better. Grabbing some cocoa powder and sugar, you started to put everything in a mug without looking at how much you needed - the more the better !

“I didn’t knew you liked books this much.”

You jumped away with a muffled sound coming from your mouth, looking at Connor, right behind you, with wide eyes.

“Damn, you scared me ! You are really silent when you walk.”

“I am sorry (Y/n), I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“ ‘ts okay. Mhh and yeah, I really love books. I love reading stories to help me escape, sometimes.”

Well, it was more of an obsession - you owned hundreds of books, if not thousands. Thats why you needed a greenhouse, because you always loved to put them together, to let the flowers bloom and the ivy grow on the bookshelves, even if sometimes you had to cut it in order to prevent it to grow around the books and damage them. It was perfect, with the sun coming from the glass windows.

“Escape ?”

“Well… you know as much as me how life can be a dick, right ? So, the books… they… help me. Sort of. I know it probably doesn’t make sense for you but-”

“It does.”

You stopped dead in your monologue, looking at him. His eyes were almost soft while looking at you and you can’t help but blush a little.

“Really ?! Hum, I mean…okay, then.”

Wow, what a good talk ! You wanted to hit your head on your kitchen workshop. A sigh escaped you and you opened your mouth in order to say something interesting for once but some knocks at the front door stopped you and you raised a brow.

“At this hour ?” you mubbled to yourself. “Who the fuck-urgh.”

Why the hell Gavin Reed was at your door ? The guy already annoyed the fuck out of you at work, you didn’t need him to be here too ! And how did he find your place ?! After telling at your partner to stay in the kitchen - Gavin hated androids, you didn’t want to see him being rude at Connor - you headed at the entrance again and opened your door.

“Reed ? What are you doing here?”

“Don’t need to sound so rude. I wanted to know if you were fine.”

It was… strangely cute to see him concerned and you can’t help but frown a little - okay, that was definitely scary.

“ Really ?” you asked - and fuck him if you sounded so unsure about his words.

“Really. The guys at the office talked about this asshole who escaped and wanted you dead. I was coming to protect you.”

You looked at him for some seconds, trying to figure the things out. That was not usual from Reed, he was the type of people doing this with a reward in mind. You almost asked what he wanted from you but stopped - wasn’t a good idea. Instead, you gave him a smile and said :

“This is really kind of you, but I don’t think I need a protection. I got my service gun, it will be fine.”

When he didn’t say anything, and instead decided to make a move like he wanted to enter inside, you clenched your teeth and insisted :

“Reed, I will be okay. I don’t need you.”

Maybe it sounded too rude, because his eyes darkened while looking at you. Man, why did you have to open to this idiot ? You should have acted like you weren’t at home ! Gavin started to close the gap between you two and you opened your mouth, but before you can say anything you felt something on your back and a voice :

“I think (Y/n) asked you to leave.”

Your eyes widened and you raised your head to look at Connor. It was his chest you were feeling in your back, and this sudden proximity was…unexpected. He seemed firm, his body not moving at all when you decided to lean on him a little in order to stay away as much as you could from Gavin. The guy looked at the android with a visible disgust and you started to be afraid.

“I don’t think I’m going to leave this fast, dickhead.”

“But you will have to. You scare her.”

The voice of Connor at this words almost sounded like a growl and your eyes widened. What was that ?

“She’s not scared ! Not when she is looking at me like she always do at the office !”

“What the fuck, Gavin ?!” you blurted out. “I’m not interested in you at all !!”

“You heard her. You should leave now-”

“Don’t talk to me, you garbage !!” Reed scolded. “What do you think ? That she needs you ? A piece of plastic ? No, she needs a real man, with a real- ”

The man never finished his sentence, because you cut him in his monologue with the biggest slap you ever do, right on his face.

“Reed ! Say that again and its not your face that I’m going to hit next time !” you growled - a furious light shining through your eyes.

You thought it was going to calm him down but instead he just looked more enraged, if it was even possible. He raised his hand way too fast and you just had the time to look at him with a scared gaze before feeling Connor pushing you aside and grabbing Reed’s wrist. His LED was beeping furiously and- it was red ? No, yellow. But, it looked red the second before…

“What do you think you’re doing, deepshit ?!! Don’t touch me !!”

“Sadly, I don’t think you understand. Try to touch her again, and I will break all the bones in your arm.” Connor said coldly.

A gasp escaped you at this words : androids weren’t supposed to hurt any human - and right now, Connor seemed… angry, ready to break the wrist he caught in his hand. Gavin opened his mouth while looking at you, ready to say something probably bad but a grin painted his face, and you swear you could almost hear a crack coming from his wrist. It looked painful and Reed finally decided to step back while the android released his arm, looking at the both of you with - well, it looked like disgust and now it was towards you, too.

“I read your file.” he said suddenly, looking right at you. “You are so fond of those plastic shits, right, huh ?”

Your eyes widened at this words and your mind seemed to blank out. Who gave him access to the file from your previous police station ?! Only the captain was supposed to have it ! An anger you never felt before seemed to boil in your veins and you made a move towards your colleague but Connor stopped you with a hand on your right shoulder.

“(Y/n), please.” he called, and it sounded helpless. “Don’t do this. He doesn’t even deserve your attention.”

You stopped for a few seconds, and Gavin slowly gave up his victorious grin - it was probably because you watched him with rage and the android behind you looked annoyed. Finally, your shoulders fell and a sigh escaped you - you were so tired, suddenly - you never wanted to have all those bad memories thrown at you !

“Uh…okay, then…you should go, Gavin.”

The guy didn’t answer this time and left quickly, leaving you and Connor at the foot of the door, without a word. Slowly, the android decided to grab you and closed the door, leading you to the kitchen. He finished to prepare your cup of hot chocolate and gave it to you before sitting in front of you at the table of the little kitchen. Silence settled uncomfortably until Connor managed to ask :

“Are you ok, (Y/n) ?”

“Yeah, don’t worry, I’m perfectly fine.”

Hell, you knew that androids like him could probably detect your lie, but whatever. You weren’t ready to talk about the past - and especially not with him. And if he noticed the lie, he didn’t say anything and just watched you - and as you looked down at your chocolate, you totally missed the worried gaze Connor gave you.

_________

Done :) How you liked this first part, and like always tell me if there is mistakes if you want me to correct them :) Requests are open too ! (and ask me if you want to be tag in the next parts)

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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“You want me to kick your desk in half?” CONNOR AT GAVIN. PLEASE.

Break

Connor x Reader

Warnings: Violence, workplace abuse.A/N: Honestly I can’t imagine Gavin staying on the police force after the good end. The guy is physically and verbally abusive to his co-workers and an HR nightmare. He’s the epitome of violent police officers and deserves to be fired tbfh.

Connor didn’t get angry. That was the one emotion you simply never saw from the android. Sure he’d been frustrated and irritated and annoyed. You’d seen Connor get like that before, with furrowed brows and sharpened words. But you’d never ever seen him snap, not before today.

The police station was fairly empty. It was nearing the night shift, and most officers were heading home. There was a calm settling within the bullpen as one by one, human and android alike packed up their things and left offering waves and mumbles goodbye. The air in the room was cold and empty by 6 pm, a few of the lights flickered out in uninhabited areas like the breakroom. Here, it was only you, Connor and Detective Reed.The past week had been a stressful one, with an anti-android riot breaking out in one of the busier districts of the city, a few officers were hurt while trying to protect androids caught in the crossfire. With androids gaining more rights by the day, those who felt prejudiced against them became more vocal and violent with their attacks. You felt lucky that these groups were becoming less sympathetic in the eyes of the public by the day, but you were sure your android friends and co-workers were still antsy. Who wouldn’t be?Taking a pause from your work you took a moment to stretch your aching muscles, raising your hands and cracking your fingers as you cast a nonchalant glance over to Connor’s desk. Unlike the last few times you’d looked over at him (it had been more than a few) Connor seemed to be reading a magazine on a tablet. With one hand he held it in front of his face, the other resting on his cheek, propping himself up with his elbow. The sight of him taking a few minutes to himself brought a smile to your face. He was always working hard, you felt he deserved a break. This was not a shared opinion apparently, as Reed walked back from one of the vending machine, as disgusted sneer adorning his generally sour features.“Are you taking a fucking break?” Gavin nearly sounds horrified as he stops at Connors desk. You feel a lurch in your stomach as Connor looks up, placing the tablet gently on his desk.“Yes?” He asks in a calm voice. You know he doesn’t want any trouble, but that’s difficult with someone like Reed. The man was born looking for conflict. Anyone he could bully or demean he’d lock onto without a single shred of remorse.“You’re a machine, you don’t need to fucking rest- get back to work, you’re gonna have us lagging behind,” Gavin swore at Connor, knocking over a cup full of pencils, making them clatter to the floor. The loud noise is startling, but the least of your problems. You knew how Gavin got when he was stressed, and you were not about to stand by and let him get violent. Jumping to your feet and out of your chair, you failed to notice the way Connor’s jaw set.“Reed, would you fuck off?” You yell, stalking over to take Connors side. Reed rolls his eyes and scoffs, turning his attention to you. Well, at least he isn’t hassling Connor.“He’s made of plastic- He can handle it! Huh, can’t you, you prick?” Nevermind. You rest a hand on Connor’s shoulder and narrow your eyes at Reed. At first, the android says nothing, sitting still with the LED he never removed flickering wildly on his temple. 3 seconds pass, and you wait for him to retort with some calm sass. Connor does no such thing as he stands up suddenly, slamming his hands on the desk with frightening force. Both you and Gavin flinch.“I’m fucking things up? You point guns to the heads of your co-workers, and I’m the one causing problems?” Connor’s voice is raised, in a tone that you’d only ever heard him use during investigations. In those instances you knew he was putting on an act, trying to make someone talk. Right now you could hear his voice shaking, and the toxicity of the words. This wasn’t just anger, this was fury and it was real and visceral. Despite such a scary display, Gavin (ever the idiot) does not back down.“Yeah, you are. Ever since you and your fucking people started making trouble, works been getting a lot harder for all of us around here.” Connor’s eye twitches and you know he’s crossed a line. Your own rage is building in your chest, but it’s still nowhere near that of Connors’. He tilts his head in a way you would usually call cute. This was simply threatening.“If you think this is me making trouble, then I clearly need to be a little… harsher with you, Detective Reed.” Connor takes his hands off his desk, slowly walking around as he talks until he’s standing in front of Reed. Reed’s eyes narrow.“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He says through gritted teeth, taking a step forward. The two were getting closer, and a fight was bound to happen were they to get any closer. You feel a spark of fear on Connor’s behalf, but Connor doesn’t back away. Instead, his eyes trail over to Reed’s desk, cocking an eyebrow as he crosses his arms. If he was trying to look casual, it wasn’t working.“Do you like your desk, Gavin?” Connor asks with a dangerous lilt to his voice. It’s such a strange, innocuous question, yet you can see his words still chill Reed to the bone.“What-” He starts, taking a step forward before Connor interrupts him with a commanding and hate-filled tone, that you simply cannot ignore.“Would you like me to kick it in half? Destroy any of your property? Maybe your car, or your terminal? Or perhaps I could just take my anger out on you? Since you already seem so set on abusing your co-workers with your infantile tantrums.” Your mouth drops open a bit as you laugh out of nervous shock. As insults went, that was one difficult to come back from. You’re close to high-fiving Connor when you get a better look at Reed. Whether or not he’s is red in the face out of anger, embarrassment or both is unknown to you. His mouth presses into a hard and ugly line, and his body tenses in a way that is all too familiar.“You little-” Gavin lunges towards Connor, deadly intent in his eyes. You’d seen him lash out like this a billion times, but not today. Not with you around. No, this time, Gavin never reaches his target. This time a resounding crack echoes through the station, Gavin stumbling back with a hand to red, welt marked cheek.“Don’t you fucking touch him.” You spit through gritted teeth, an inferno burning viciously in your eyes as you stare Reed down. How you’d managed the speed to step between both men, you did not know. You’re half ready to explode and engulf yourself in an angry tirade when the sound of sharp retreating footsteps break you from your thoughts. Connor is stalking out of the bullpen, towards the bathrooms, and with not a single thought more about Reed, you follow him.He’s already halfway there when you start power walking his way, calling his name as he throws open the door, storming inside. When you reach it you pause. Would it be better to simply leave him alone? No. It’s more important to make sure he’s alright.With a slow creak, you push open the door, finding Connor leaning over the sink, both hands resting either side and curled into a ball. With a voice just louder than a whisper, you call his name, watching his body tense. “He’ll never see me as a person, will he?” He doesn’t look up, but you don’t need to see his face to know that he’s hurting. You can feel your heartache as you step forward, shutting the door quietly behind you.“Connor, I-” You begin but are cut off as he straightens up suddenly, looking at you with brown eyes alight with anger. It’s a frankly terrifying sight.“I’m a living being! I deserve respect! I deserve to be able to go into my workplace and not have to worry about being shot!” He points a finger to his chest, and you can now see tears brimming in your eyes. Your heart goes from aching to wrenching as you stand there, wordless. Connor slams his fists against the counter, far harder than before.“I’m- Fuck!” He swears loudly -a rarity to your ears-, and you make a small noise of surprise as you jump back, a hand going to your chest as he looks back at you, anger giving way to guilt. He raises his hands up apologetically.“I’m-I’m sorry, I didn’t want to scare you, I…” He trails off, leaning against the counter with a deep sigh, his hands going to his hair. Was this… the first time he’d had an outburst like this? It would explain why he reacted so badly to the situation. You let out a soft sigh. Oh, Connor.“It’s okay. You have every right to be angry right now,” You take another few steps forward till your by his side. His eyes flicker to your face briefly as you offer him a small smile, looking at you both in the mirror.“Just maybe don’t take it on anything. There are much better ways to cope.” Connor nods slowly, eyes turning down to the sink as he sighs, rapping his fingers against the marble counter-top sink with increasing urgency. His body is shaking, something you were unaware that he, an android could even do. There were few times you’d seen him in a state like this, and every time it was like taking a bullet to the chest. You want to help steady him- to say something, but it’s hard to even try beginning to understand what he’s going through. His fingers continue to rap against the counter, and an idea pops into your head.“Are you okay with being touched right now?” You ask, and he jolts, eyeing you nervously.“I-I don’t know…” He answers honestly and you bite your lip, hoping he’d be okay with this as you extend your hand out, resting it atop his lightly. You watch his fingers flex a few times, but he does not flinch away. Looking back up you find his cheeks painted a slight, pretty shade of blue.“Is this okay?” You ask after a few seconds, smiling and holding his hand tighter as he gives a nod. His hands are so cold.“Yes.” He says quietly, looking back down at your hands. The change in his demeanour is almost instant, his shoulders dropping and the tension leaving his body. You can’t help but smile, unable to stop your next words from tumbling out of your mouth.“Would you like a hug?” You ask a little too casually for your liking. Why had you done that? What if he thought something of it? The shade of blue in his cheeks darkens as his eyes widen just a little. And then he nods.He nods.“… If it’s of no inconvenience.” He says gently, and you only nod dumbly in return. In seconds his arms are wrapping around your waist, his face pressing into your shoulder as your hands plant themselves on his back. You try to stop yourself from having a heart attack as you realize he’s nuzzling into your neck.“This is good?” You ask in a nervously pitched voice, and he hums almost happily. You relax just a bit at the noise, rubbing his back gently.“And this?” You ask again, terrified that you’ll do something wrong or upset him. Or make him hate you. You really were starting to panic, completely unaware that he was feeling the absolute opposite of your fears.“Yes, Y/N-Thank you.” He mumbles into your shirt, and a shiver runs itself up your back. Had you ever been this close to Connor before? You didn’t think so. You had to do this more often, you decided. For his sake, of course.

“We’re partners, Connor. I’ve got you back. Always.” You tell him, throwing inhibition to the wind as you pressed a kiss to the side of his head. You don’t feel anything but the subtle, painless dig of his fingers into your shirt and skin.

The two of you stand in complete silence that way for some few, treasured, seconds, you patting his back and his hair. It’s Connor who speaks up, sighing as he rests his chin on your shoulder.

“I just- I can’t even retaliate, or else I’ll be the one in trouble.” He vents and you realize he’s talking about Gavin. He wasn’t wrong, Fowler has to have a soft spot for the guy, or else he would have been fired years ago. You sigh in agreement.

“I can do it for you.” You feel Connor laugh into your neck, not grasping the sincerity of your statement. You would do it in a heartbeat, for him.

“I’m serious, I mean- I already did.” You giggle as he pulls away, arms still hooked around your waist, yours now resting on his shoulders. The warmth in his eyes seems to have returned, sending your stomach into flutters.

“I couldn’t ask that of you.” He says, and you fight the urge to say that you’d kill for him. That maybe wouldn’t go down so well.

“That asshole has had it coming for years, I’d be doing the world a favour.” You decided on, with a smirk. Connor laughs again but you can hear it’s a little forced, and your brow furrows. Had you said something wrong?

“And if he retaliates back and attacks me?” Connor asks, sounding perturbed. It hits you then how futile he must think this all is. The times he’d sat and taken Gavin’s abuse, the times he never fought back or talked to Fowler. He really thought nothing would be done about it. That he would be blamed.

“Have you talked to anyone about this? HR? Fowler?” Connor flinches, and before he’s even begun speaking you can feel your stomach sinking.

“He said it was a personal issue, something I had to work out on my own.” You stop at this. You pause and rewind, looking at everything Gavin ever did to Connor. All the disgusting threats and physical assaults. All the times that everyone in charge blew him off.

No wonder Connor got so angry. No wonder he snapped like he did- he should have snapped months ago, you should have snapped months ago. Connor was more than capable of handling Gavin on his own, he’d done it before during the android protests last year. But now there were consequences- and figures of power who wouldn’t necessarily choose his side. Your blood is boiling as you bite your tongue to hold in the stream of angry insults. Instead, your hands move to cup Connors face, holding his gaze in yours.

“We’re talking to Fowler about this. Hank, you and I. You’re a member of the team and deserve to be treated as such, okay? And if he does nothing then we’re going to HR, we’ll download security footage, we’ll convince the others to talk- We’ll get this fucker fired.” You were tired of inaction. You’d storm into Fowler’s office yourself, Hank at your side if it meant knocking some sense into your boss.

“…Okay.” Connor nods as you stop fighting the urge to get any closer to him, standing on the tips of your toes to press a kiss to his forehead, humming when his arms only wrap further around you.

“I’m gonna fuck them up so bad.” You mutter into him, pressing a few more quick kisses to his face before falling back on your heels, unable to keep the anger in your expression as you soften, staring into his tender brown eyes.

“I know you will.” He mumbles, a smile playing on his lips, and no trace of the turbulent emotions from before. “You said it yourself, we’re partners. You’ll always have my back.”

TAGLIST

@glitch-girl318

@roseval221

@im-not-insane-im-a-fangirl

@pokengirl2

@chee-woozled

@haikyuu-imagines-and-others

@sweetsailor000

@missgoddessdenicia

@samsternelly

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@yvning

@herstorycallyinaccurate

@heaven-eather

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@maellem

@imthatonemarvelbitch

@pinkrose423

@lilyflower

@terrainhead

@classycookiebailiffstudent

@prettylightskindoll88

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Now you’re not a machine anymore, you have to understand how heavy a life can weight.

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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*PLEASE* reblog this if you’re a Detroit: Become Human fan and/or blog

especially if you post a lot of connor

i need W A Y more dbh blogs and friends to follow i literally want it to be the only thing on my dash

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Water

Part 1

Pairing: Connor RK800 x Reader

Summary: Shower thoughts and existential crisis.

Word Count: 1653

A/N: im dodging responsibilities rn

You leaned into the bathtub, sleeves rolled up and safely tucked away from the spraying water. You aimed the nozzle against the wall, pressing fingers in front of the spray to test the temperature. You knew it wouldn’t affect him, but you made sure it was comfortable anyways.

“Okay, I’m gonna wash your back first, is that alright with you?” You asked with a low voice. You didn’t want to startle Connor, especially in the state he was in.

“That’s okay.” He quietly replied. His LED still flashed yellow.

Connor was bare in your bathtub. His blue stained clothes were tossed on the linoleum, ripped and torn beyond repair. Hank had dropped him off at your house, asking to take care of him while he was at the station. He needed to file a report, there was a deviant android killed at their investigation. Something about Stratford Tower, the reason why channel 16 had such a chilling message on display earlier.

From what Hank told you, it was this same android that Connor was connected to at the time of death. He felt every emotion, before and after the deviant pulled the trigger. Connor hadn’t spoken about it since, but Hank told you what little he knew.

So he left Connor with you, Hank’s neighbor, to try and calm the android back down. He has been unresponsive and even at some points hostile with other officers. He couldn’t go back to the station like this, so you were trying your best to help him out.

And to do that, you decided to rid him of the other androids blood, perhaps that would be a good start.

He was shot in the shoulder, so you took a washcloth to that wound first. Connor didn’t flinch, didn’t even acknowledge that you were wiping away the remnants of his wound. Maybe Cyberlife can repair the damage, you took mental note to take him to an engineer later.

You carefully wiped away at his freckled skin, minding the clean hole straight through his shoulder. With a gentle spray of water, you rinsed the soapy suds and watched as they trailed down his back. For the most part, the blue blood was easily rinsed off. But grime mixed with the substance created a more thick gunk of a liquid, sticking to his skin and hair. He was practically covered in it, needing a gentle scrub to remove it all.

“Can I wash your hair now?” You asked, pointing the detachable shower head away from him.

“Yes.”

His voice was still a low rumble, barely audible next to the sound of rushing water through rusty pipes.

With a gentle tug and reassuring words, you tilted his head back. His eyes were closed, face still stained with dirt and blood. You would get to that in a moment.

You rinsed his hair, combing gently with your fingers to remove what you can.

Connor’s eyes were still closed, but with each passing of your hands through his hair made the harsh furrow in his brow slowly disappear. The worry lines in his face melted at your touch and his LED quickly flashed a welcoming blue before dropping back to yellow. He was starting to feel better.

You popped open the shampoo, giving a few quick smacks against your palm to try and squeeze out what ever was left of the emptying bottle. You soon had enough and began to work the cucumber scented soap into his synthetic hair.

You let Connor straighten out his poster while working the shampoo in. He soon began to roll his head, allowing you to reach better behind his ears or at the back of his head. You focused on the ways his muscles contracted and loosened. How each fiber worked to support his body much like any other human. It was interesting, amazing, even.

“Can you put your head back again? I’m gonna rinse of the soap.” You asked him, a little more confidence in your voice.

He did as you asked, awaiting the warm spray of water to his hair. And so you did, gently combing through his strands once more, watching the tinted water run down his back and into the drain.

You kept rinsing until the water ran clear. Luckily, it didn’t take long. So you shifted on your knees, positioning yourself to better reach his front.

Connor opened his eyes, watching as you struggled outside the tub to find a comfortable position. Before he could say anything, you brought the nozzle forward, giving him a gentle smile.

“Can I wash your face?” You asked, warm eyes looking at him in a way he’s never seen before. No one ever looked at him like this, no one even wanted to look at him. He was an android, and yet you looked at him like a human. Why?

“Yes.” He answered, voice wavering for just a moment. Your eyebrows twitched in worry, but he leaned in, helping you to better reach him.

You struggled to reach across him for another bottle, face wash. You used it to remove your makeup, but you assumed it would work well against the grime stuck to his face.

Squeezing a generous amount onto your hand, you lathered the product into his cheeks, taking note of the way his face feels. It stretches like human skin with each swipe of your hands, his freckled cheeks feel poreless, though. Not a single flaw or imperfection could be felt. It was strange, though, that they took the time to add moles and freckles to his skin. All the while keeping any other impurities away.

The dirt and blue blood gave way, floating above soap suds and removing their hold on Connor’s skin.

“Okay, hold your breath and keep your eyes closed for me.” You asked of him.

“I can actively hold my breath for hours, should the need arise.” Connor commented. You let out a laugh.

“Well, we don’t need that now. Just for a few seconds, okay?” You clarified.

“Okay.” He answered.

You aimed the nozzle at his hairline, letting the running water rise away the soap and debris.

You rubbed against his cheeks again, scrubbing away any stubborn pieces. It was a little difficult, however, because certain spots you were actually rubbing against his darker freckles.

But soon his face was free of blue blood and dirt, and so you aimed the water away again, letting him breathe and open his eyes.

“How’s that feel?” You asked, watching him blink away the water.

“Clean.” He replied. A standard answer. But little did you know, he wasn’t talking about his body.

His LED was a more steady blue, but every now and then would flash back to yellow.

“Can you tell me what happened?” You asked cautiously, worried that the question would throw him back into the quiet abyss of his mind.

You grabbed the wash cloth again, bringing it under his neck and down to his collar bones. Connor kept his eyes on your face, watching the gentle furrow between your brows as you wiped away the dirt.

“The deviant,” Connor started. “…He shot himself.”

You paused your work, looking up at him with a worried glance. He was staring forward this time, no longer focusing on you. You chose to continue wiping at his skin, allowing him the comfort to tell his story without your scrutinizing glare.

“I was—he had information. So I probed his memory.” Connor explained. You wiped away at more blue blood, this time on the front end of his wound. You could see right through him, and yet he seemed unbothered. “I was… I…”

He struggled to answer, you watched his LED go from blue back down to yellow, flashing quickly to red a few blinks. He was falling back into that place again.

“Hey, it’s okay, you don’t have to explain.” You whispered to him, brushing away wet locks from his forehead. The feathered touches made him lean in, trying to catch more pressure. He liked the feeling of your hands he realized, the way they dragged so gently over his freckles. Unusual, he thought, pleasure wasn’t written in his original program. Must be an adaptation.

Connor looked up at you, his face trapped between your palms. “I think… I have to.”

You ran a thumb over his cheeks, giving a smile as a silent approval to continue.

“He died…while I was still connected.” He stared into your eyes as he spoke, gentle brown hues flaked with gold. He had wonderful eyes, you realized. “I felt it. It was like… I died.”

He grasped your hand, still over his cheek. You felt him press against you even further, desperately.

“I felt… fear.” He admitted. It was as if he was opening his heart to you, letting you in to view his deepest and darkest feelings. But that was the scariest part, he wasn’t supposed to have feelings. “Am I deviant?”

You held his gaze. Absorbed the very way he desperately asked for an answer though his eyes, the tightening grip on your hand with fear. He was scared to even know what you’d say. That, in itself, should have answered his question.

“I don’t know, Connor.” You tried to assure, leave this issue for another day. For now, you wanted him to be rid of these thoughts, rid of the evidence on his body. “I think… only you know the answer to that.”

You pulled your hand from his grasp, running your fingers through wet locks once more. His eyes slowly shut, allowing the gentle massage to calm him. The red turned back to yellow, eventually blinking into a steady blue.

You aimed the nozzle back to his chest, rinsing away the work you had left. If only his problems washed away as easily.

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Humans Are Oddities [Connor DBH]

SORRY I’VE BEEN FCKN GOD KNOWS WHERE (Uni is actually so much than I thought and I have a grad project due so soon and i highkey am so stressed and instead of actually doing anything about it i was like ‘YEA ITS COOL IF I WRITE AND NOT DO ANYTHING FOR MY DEGREE’)

So here we are.

DBH in a matter of less than a day has me obsessed and i thought of this fun little one shot that could turn into a ‘reader x’ series but here we ARE. (other requests are coming I PROMISE)

Pairing: Reader x Connor

Fandom: Detroit Become Human

Prompt: It’s always a risk being one of the few people who aid and assist Deviants, but its an even bigger risk being located deep in Detroit. A selfless act of helping Deviants is soon to turn sour when you arouse the curiosity and suspicions of Lieutenant Anderson and his partner Connor.

Part(s) 1 of ??? [[PART 2]] [[PART 3]] [[PART 4]] [[PART 5]] [[PART 6]] [[PART 7]] [[PART 8]]

Tags: @crazy-rafe-madler (if you guys wanna see more - let me know and I’ll tag ya! xx)

Word Count: 2,203

A loud knocking had jolted you awake and alerted you from a mediocre sleep. It was only 1:43 AM according to your clock, the brightness of the LEDs made you wince. It was placed haphazardly on the bedside table, on the brink of falling off and to be honest some days you wouldn’t mind if the blasted thing fell to the floor and smashed. Hastily, you ripped a thick coat off the back of the door attempting to shield your body from the biting chill in the house by shrugging it on as you answer the door with confidence.

The neighborhood you lived it in was less than ideal, it wasn’t encouraged you’d let strangers in past sundown with the red-ice epidemic. And it certainly wasn’t ideal to let someone in who was urgently banging on the door at the early hours of the morning. But, typically that sense of urgency meant one thing and one thing only.

“Y/N…I - I was told you could help me…” A frightened Android that looked like it was barely holding together in some places stood in the harsh rain that your doorstep could hardly shield. “Come… quickly… “ You ushered her inside and shut the door after a quick once over on the street. “No one followed you? Cops?” You quizzed, seating the deviant android on your couch.

She shook her head before looking back up at you, it made you soften your face with an apologetic smile, “I’m sorry, you guys aren’t exactly making it easy to keep evading cops… this street gets patrolled too frequently now…” You explained with a reassuring smile as you kneel down to flick up the rug under the Android’s feet.

“Do you fear the authorities are becoming suspicious?” She questioned nervously, the LED on her head turning yellow indicated that. Ripping up two floorboard panels you shrugged whilst pulling out a canister of blue blood with minor biocomponents and placed them on the coffee table. “Not while I’m still working at CyberLife.” You answered, hope lingered in your voice as you reached over the coffee table and gripped onto the toolbox.

You worked with a certain speciality to the Androids who look for aid in you, this droid was no different. Thrust upon their injured hands and arms was the canister of Thirium. “Drink up, you’re gonna need it.” Your voice wavered slightly, between pity and encouragement. Since the day you vowed to help Deviants escape it had become a blessing to let all these helpless beings come to you for you to give them hope, and it was even more beneficial given you were an engineer at CyberLife.

Studying the anatomy, the parts, the components were all apart of your profession. In fact, you seemed to be the one of few capable of doing your job to a high enough standard that you weren’t replaced by specific Androids.

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

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Paws

DETROIT: BECOME HUMAN Connor RK800 x Reader Request: Hellu! I’ve been watching people getting surprised with pets on youtube, and therefore I have been wondering, could you write a short where Reader does that with Connor, like giving him a puppy for a perceived birthday or some holiday. Our local precious boi loves dogs after all. - by @killergirlfuria

Words: +1000

A/N: This Requests was so damn cute!! I hope you guys enjoy the very fluffyness :)

MY MASTERLIST REQUESTS

“Shhh, you need to be quiet, I don´t know if he is home already!” she whispered to the small box in her arms and the people in the elevator threw her a concerned look until they heard a small whine coming from it.

“Hey do you really want to ruin the surprise?!” she shout whispered and left the elevator when it stopped on her floor, before struggling with the Front door of her apartment. Carefully looking around every corner it seemed like Connor hadn´t returned from his visit from Hank.

“We are lucky little guy!” she chuckled excited before letting the box down carefully.

Lifting the lid, the small dog immediately climbed out of the box and started to explore the livingroom.

While she watched him closely, Y/N pulled everything, she bought at the pet store, out of her backpack.

Placing the tiny collar around his fluffy neck, for a moment the small creature seemed to be confused and tried to look down at him but soon forgot about that when he saw the new toys she was placing in his soft dog bed.

“God he will adore you so much…” she sighed in adoration and the little golden retriever tried to bark at her.

“Aww.” patting it´s head the puppy thought it was now playtime and he easily convinced Y/N to engage in a little play of tag until they heard the key turn in the door.

“Oh no! You damn trickster had me wasting time.” grabbing the little pup, she quickly ran into their bedroom.

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

Note

Another Connor x human reader request (because I’m honestly obsessed) where the reader almost dies to save him, and it’s all fluffy and he’s worried and scared to lose her and stuff? Idk go with whatever you think of :)

Guilt

Request: @slytherinbedwithme Would you mind doing a Connor x reader where a deviant gets too nervous and hurts the reader badly? It’s a fatal wound but reader comes out okay but Connor gets so scared and protective when reader gets hurt? I’m not sure if I worded this correctly lol Warnings: Mentions of blood, injury, guns, violence.Words: 2,070A/N: I merged 2 requests which were pretty similar, hope that’s okay! Also I think this is my fav Connor fic so far!

Emotions were a human trait. They influenced impulse and bad decision making. They affected what should be simple scenarios, they complicated situations and soured even the sweetest thing.

Emotions were a human trait, exclusive to their living species. But Connor wasn’t sure how else to explain how he felt.

How could he explain the energy that thrummed through his synthetic veins as his foot tapped rhythmically on the cold, linoleum floor? An action that could only be described as anxious.

How could he explain the glances he cast, across the way to the ever opening and closing ward door? Searching for the face of the doctor that had greeted him some few hours ago?

How else could he explain the pain? Pain, that he had never truly experienced before. Twisting his artificial insides at an agonizingly slow pace, like a dull knife. Tugging at his chest and dragging his thirium powered heart to the pit of his stomach. Squeezing, crushing his head like a clamp, forcing painful memories of hours prior back to the forefront of his mind.

How could he explain it, when he didn’t even know how to process it? When the world around him seemed muffled, and blurry, where could he go for clarity?

The only clear thing at that moment was the hand on his shoulder, and the repeat of a gunshot, over and over and over in his ear.

“It’s not your fault, Connor,” Hank tells him again, patting his back in a rare show of affection. Not that Connor really registers. It’s all far too much, with him trying to run diagnostics every second, searching for the source of this… imitated emotion.

Because that’s what it was. He couldn’t be feeling, he wasn’t made for that. So something had to be wrong. He had to have damaged himself in the fight, knocked something loose while he wasn’t paying attention.

God, why had he not been paying attention?

The first time he doesn’t look to the door as it opens is, unsurprisingly, the time the doctor finally decides to grace Connor with any news.

“They’re awake and ready to be-” Is all he manages to get out before Connor is on his feet, taking long strides towards the room he’d been aching to enter for far too long now. Even Hank calling his name, and the shout of the doctor does nor cause his step to falter. No, that does not happen till he enters the room.

Pale, early morning sunlight came through the blinds of the hospital room in broken streaks, falling on the pure white sheets singular bed positioned by the window. Sheets that clung to a weak, but breathing body.

You looked bad. But, he supposed most people who’d been shot did. Bandages wrapped around like the strap to a handbag over your right shoulder to under your left armpit, covering bloodied gauze and a bullet wound only a few centimetres from your collarbone. A bullet wound that could have been prevented. You hadn’t seemed to have noticed the commotion outside, nor his entrance, your eyes fixed on the window, peeking out into a courtyard through a half-drawn blind. You looked peaceful. At least you did, before he took a step forward, and shattered whatever trance had been keeping your eyes on the outside world.

Meeting your eyes was like coming face to face with a higher power. His knees went weak, nearly buckling when a smile pulled the corners of his lips up. Yet another diagnostic told him nothing was malfunctioning. Whatever damage he’d taken must have rendered him unable to assess himself. Yes, that had to be it.

“You’re… you’re okay.” The words are like a heavy punch to the gut, winding Connor before he can move any closer. You’d breathed it out with a level of relief he didn’t think was possible.

“Why… why would I not be?” He speaks, but it’s not words familiar to him- rather, it’s not a tone he knows. Strained, like he’s pushing a weight off his chest. And it only gets worse when you sit up, an eagerness to see him that he knows he does not deserve.

“The fight…” You trail off, and it’s to the effect of a blade dragging down his back. You push yourself up, palms flat on the bed as you made small noises of exertion. Connor took another step forward.

“You shouldn’t be moving. Rest.” His throat tightens as the corners of your mouth tilt up, amusement flickering in your eyes as you took on a teasing tone.

“Don’t tell me you’re worried.” You wait expectantly for some snarky or cold response, but there’s nothing. Resting a hand on a nearby chair, he leans and sighs. There was no point in speaking. He couldn’t deny it. He couldn’t lie like that right now. Watching his movements, your mouth dropped open a little, smile long gone.

“Connor-” Your eyebrows furrow, and you go to move a little more when his hand raises, stopping you in your tracks. You weren’t about to get up an hurt yourself again. Not when he had questions.

“I don’t understand.” He hates how shaky his voice is right now. He’s a detective. He’d seen humans die. He’d seen the almost. The before, the during and the after a billion times. This time should not have been any different. This one shouldn’t have warranted such a strong reaction.

“What?” Your voice is but a hushed whisper, laced with confusion. You were anxious. Of course, you were. He was not supposed to be acting this way.

“I don’t understand, why did you…” He trails off, hands trailing to his pocket, retrieving a cold metal coin, with which his fingers began to play with. Your eyes had moved down to your hands, clasped in your lap. For all his analytical ability, Connor, could not read a single expression on your face.

“Take the bullet?” You finish, and his fingers flinch, nearly dropping the coin altogether. Placing it back in his pocket, his fingers move instinctually to his tie.

“… Exactly,” He nods, finding some stability to his voice, but it doesn’t last long. “I can be rebuilt, but you are… fragile.” It’s your turn to sigh softly, as with some struggle you move, letting your feet dangle over the side of the bed. For a moment he’s worried you’re about to get up, but you sit still.

“You coming back doesn’t make it any less traumatic for me. Or Hank.” And there’s that coil again, tightening around his chest. He needs no breath, no air, but the compressions are the closest thing he can imagine to suffocating.

“C'mere.” Connor’s eyes snap up to meet yours again, but this time he finds your hand extended to him. Curling, signalling him closer. He feels he’s already overstayed his welcome, that the others- the humans, should get the chance to speak to you. But a part of him finds this opportunity to be too sweet. A part of him wants to be selfish. And for once, he lets that part take over.

It’s a short distance to where you sit, and he crosses it in a matter of seconds, stopping what he’d describe as close enough, and you’d describe as ‘leaving more than enough room for Jesus’. His hands go behind his back, standing to attention but for whatever reason, you don’t seem satisfied.

“Closer.” You say, both arms extended now. His throat closes up, but he follows his orders. Stepping forward, you’re now only an arm’s length away. He’s sure that suffices, but again, he’s wrong.

“A little closer.” You smile, fingers brushing his hands as you pull him in. It’s a good thing you do- for he can barely move. Locked up, the instructions he was sending weren’t going to the right places. His legs, his arms- they don’t respond. All that registers is the warmth of your hands as you hold his tight, staring up at his face with a gentle expression.

“I didn’t know an android could feel guilty.” You sound amused, and Connor fails to see the humour in the situation. You had been shot. Because he had not been concentrating on his mission. Because he had been distracted. You were hurt because of him. It should have been him- his body examined at some CyberLife facility.

That’s what he keeps telling himself, but it’s hard to keep his thought in line when your fingers begin to trail up his arm and over his shoulder, coming to rest on his cheek. Your thumb brushes along his cheekbone, and he swears he feels a shiver down his spine.

“Hank-” He begins, but you cut him off effectively with a swift movement of your thumb from his cheek to his bottom lip. Why, now, did his body seem to be overheating?

“Would have come in by now if he planned to.” You say, moving your other hand up to cup his other cheek. Thumb still resting on his lower lip, Connor fights the urge to lick his lips. He fights his urge to feel at all because he knows it’s too late. He’s feeling, and he had to put a stop to it before the situation escalated.

He can’t remember a time he’d been touched like this. He could barely remember positive physical contact at all. It was all fights, punches and kicks. A pat on the back or a hug from you or Hank, and then back to the fighting. This wasn’t like a hug, that was nowhere close to the definition of what was happening here, of what he was feeling.

Without a word you bring his head down, pressing your forehead to his with your eyes closed, breathing another long sigh of relief. At some point, his hands had found their way to your lower back, sitting there awkwardly as he stared at your serene face.

More specifically, he stares at your lips. Yes, he notices the few marks that dot your skin, and yes, he’d noted the colour of your eyes before they’d shut. But it was your lips that interested him the most. Slightly parted, inhaling and exhaling, quickened breath. A quick scan tells him your heart rate is higher than normal.

“I’m happy you’re okay.” You sound calm, while Connor can only make a soft sound of agreement in return. Eyes flickering open, the smile on your face tells Connor just what kind of expression he has on his face, and just before he can come up with an intelligible response, he’s silenced as you lift yourself up, pressing a gentle kiss to the bridge of his nose.

He’s shutting down. He’s sure of it. That’s why the world seems to be blacking out, or why every single motor, engine, scanner and what have you seemed to be malfunctioning, overheating, self-destructing. This was it. This was how he would die. At the hands of a kiss.

Your lips move up, kissing his forehead as his arms wrap their way fully around your back, seeking a comfort he did not know he needed until minutes- seconds, ago. Your hands threaded through his hair, and he feels utterly at your mercy. He wants to do something, to make up for the shot, the care you showed him now, but he’s at a loss, grasping at his memories of the few romance movies he’s seen. He can’t kiss you, for fear of ruining the moment by meeting your gaze. Or of inexperience- inadequacy. He can’t kiss your lips, so he opts for the closest thing.

The gasp that leaves you as he presses his lips to your neck is a wonderful one, and one he endeavours to hear more of as he does it again and again, soft pecks that grew passionate over a short course of time.

“Connor…” You breathe out, and it takes all his strength not to dig his nails into your skin when he hears his name on your lips like that. You were already injured enough, no need to cause any pain.

He pulls away, your hands back to his cheeks, his holding your waist. He doesn’t need a mirror to know his hair is a mess, that his tie is crooked, or his clothes ruffled. For the first time, he doesn’t even care.

“I’m happy you’re safe.” It’s not the most romantic thing he could have said, but you don’t seem to care one bit, looping your arms around the back of his neck before pulling him into a long-awaited, sweet- if clumsy, kiss.

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alasitsearwax · 7 years ago

Note

Guilt

Emotions were a human trait. They influenced impulse and bad decision making. They affected what should be simple scenarios, they complicated situations and soured even the sweetest thing.

Emotions were a human trait, exclusive to their living species. But Connor wasn’t sure how else to explain how he felt.

How could he explain the energy that thrummed through his synthetic veins as his foot tapped rhythmically on the cold, linoleum floor? An action that could only be described as anxious.

How could he explain the glances he cast, across the way to the ever opening and closing ward door? Searching for the face of the doctor that had greeted him some few hours ago?

How could he explain it, when he didn’t even know how to process it? When the world around him seemed muffled, and blurry, where could he go for clarity?

The only clear thing at that moment was the hand on his shoulder, and the repeat of a gunshot, over and over and over in his ear.

God, why had he not been paying attention?

The first time he doesn’t look to the door as it opens is, unsurprisingly, the time the doctor finally decides to grace Connor with any news.

“You shouldn’t be moving. Rest.” His throat tightens as the corners of your mouth tilt up, amusement flickering in your eyes as you took on a teasing tone.

“What?” Your voice is but a hushed whisper, laced with confusion. You were anxious. Of course, you were. He was not supposed to be acting this way.

“Take the bullet?” You finish, and his fingers flinch, nearly dropping the coin altogether. Placing it back in his pocket, his fingers move instinctually to his tie.

“Hank-” He begins, but you cut him off effectively with a swift movement of your thumb from his cheek to his bottom lip. Why, now, did his body seem to be overheating?

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