always-pining

[always-pining]

music tag game! 🎶

thanks for tagging @the-verity!

really didn't know what to expect just shuffling wildly, but these are 5 great choices (in my humble and correct opinion). <3

Rules: Put your music library on shuffle, then list the first five songs that come up in a poll to let people vote for which one they like the most!

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freshly gotten together wolfstar are two little fuckers

sirius, who knowing how feral remus gets over the back of his neck, starts wearing his hair up, purposely leaving it a bit messy. remus, who’s usually insecure about himself, noticing how flustered sirius gets when he’s tutoring other students, starts spending extra time bent over his notes, glancing at him from beneath his lashes.

sirius, who then starts casually squeezing his arm more and more often when he laughs, leaning into him, sharing the same space, whispering dangerous things under his breath. remus, who’s slowly going mad, forgetting the importance of description, sneaking his hands under sirius's sweater just to watch him squirm.

sirius and remus, who begin spending way too much time in "study sessions" in the empty wings of the castle, returning to the dorm with swollen lips, messy ties, and smiles a little too smug.

[always-pining]

13 Going On 30 (2004)

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Lost Time - Chapter 7: Why Can't I?

this chapter was powered 90% by a recent rewatch of 13 Going on 30 and 10% by religious trauma! a powerful combo.

James looked skeptical. “That’s it?”  “That’s it.” Sirius nodded, feeling very small and forlorn. “He said I need to figure out what I wanted.”  Why did I say that? Sirius flushed and felt his stomach twist into familiar knots.  James laughed and rolled his eyes. When Sirius didn’t join him—his stupid, bullshit facial expression probably giving him away—James’s features changed into something ominous. “What does that mean?” “Who knows? Ha,” Sirius forced a laugh. “What does Remus ever mean? Probably nothing. I should go.”  “You can’t go, you’re staying the night and your car’s not here—Reg took it, remember? What does that mean, Sirius?”  These questions made Sirius incredibly uncomfortable and, also, angry. He felt angry at Remus for asking him to figure himself out in the first place—what did he know, anyway? And now, he felt furious at James for pressing him on the subject, especially when it was clear he did not want to talk about it at all.  He said nothing. James took off his glasses, cleaning the smudges away with his ragged, worn-out Alabama Football t-shirt. “Sirius, I mean…” he seemed to be fumbling for words, trying to figure out the right thing to say. Sirius wanted to grab him, cover his mouth with his hand, press the words back down his throat, and beg him, please, please, don’t say it. 

[always-pining]

maybe growing up is just becoming who you were at 14 again but learning how to love her this time

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Pic Crew Tag Game!

ty for the tag! @the-verity

pic crew and last song!

you can find me wearing a sweater no matter the weather & listening to extremely sad songs on any given day. so this feels like a fairly accurate representation :)

tagging @birdy-anne :)

[always-pining]

The Count of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas

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something something “heaven” by mitski etc etc

details below the cut but they’re not hq bc i made this before i figured out canvas sizes on procreate lmfaooo

[always-pining]

artist : sybillgray

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Chapter 4: Promise Me?

Lost Time (A Walk to Remember AU)

It wasn’t cold yet, not really, the air already crisp but lacking a real chill this time of year. And still, Sirius shivered when Remus said, “Promise you won’t fall in love with me, or anything.”  And really, what a thing to say. 

There was an odd note in his voice when he said it, like even he was surprised to hear the words. The wind picked up around them, pushing Remus’s hair out of his face just slightly. Sirius wanted to brush it back down. He wanted to laugh, but felt like his throat was starting to collapse. He coughed again, then let out an entirely unconvincing laugh. The worst thing about it was he didn’t know what Remus meant. Don’t fall in love with me? Was it a joke? A warning? A pickup line?  Sirius didn’t know which option was worse. He hoped it was a joke, obviously he hoped it was a joke. That’s why he laughed; it was supposed to be funny, clearly. That Remus Lupin and his wacky sense of humor. Weren’t people always saying that? Sirius swore he’d heard that one before, probably. Somewhere.  Alright, so it was a joke. Not a funny one. But who could blame Remus? He was a strange guy, didn’t have many friends. Sirius couldn’t blame him for the odd joke. His heart was still beating too quickly. Sirius added that to the long list of things wrong with him: heart attack. He should really get his heart looked at; surely his dad had connections to at least one of the nation’s leading cardiologists. Because that was the only explanation for the way his heart was still racing, the way his entire body felt fuzzy, the way he suddenly noticed Remus’s long fingers and the particular curve of his lower lip. 

[always-pining]

The irresistible urge to make a playlist for every WIP.

This one is for Lost Time (and is still, itself, a work in progress).

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Hawaiian series of HP art 🏝️🦜 Sirius and Remus are having a great time (and sending letters to Harry by parrots)

[always-pining]

Ioanna Tsatsou, from a journal entry featured in Hours on Sinai, originally published in 1984

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Chapter 3: Honey, I Love You

Lost Time - A Walk to Remember AU

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Quick tips for writing kisses

⇰ the pause. THE PAUSE. like “are we doing this? oh god we’re doing this.”

⇰ looking at each other’s mouths like it’s a life-or-death decision

⇰ someone whispering “can I?” or “just once” before going for it and RUINING ME EMOTIONALLY

⇰ hands. gripping shirts. cupping faces. hovering like “do I touch?? I WANNA TOUCH”

⇰ breath hitching?? yes. shakiness?? absolutely.

⇰ that stupid moment where one of them pulls back a few inches like “wait are you sure” and the other just goes for it again

⇰ kissing like they’re scared it’ll be the last time

⇰ kissing like they’ve been waiting ten goddamn years

⇰ teeth clashing awkwardly and both laughing about it but STILL FEELING IT

⇰ one of them freezing for a second mid-kiss because the feelings just hit

⇰ the post-kiss moment of “uh. so. yeah.” where neither knows what the hell just happened

⇰ OR the post-kiss forehead touch. destroy me.

[always-pining]

Chapter 2: Everyone is Welcome Here!

Lost Time - A Wolfstar AU of A Walk to Remember

“Didn’t McG tell you? I’m your newest volunteer tutor.” Sirius plastered on a sarcastic grin and gave a weak thumbs-up. “I’m a model student now.”  Remus raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. Sirius almost wished he would say something biting and sarcastic, like he’d done to Barty the other day in the cafeteria. For some reason, he wanted to hear what Lupin might come up with; wanted to see if he’d be able to make him laugh. Wanted to see his mouth once again fight back a grin, curling over his crooked tooth. But Remus said nothing. The silence was unbearable.  “I’m serious.”  “I know your name.” Remus wrote something down on the piece of paper in front of him. It was incredibly infuriating. Sirius used his right hand to push his hair out of his face.  “No, I mean, I’m really here to be a tutor. I’m paying my debt to society.”  He felt inexplicably happy to see Remus’s mouth twitch slightly at this comment, like he was carefully considering what he might say next. Sirius wanted to press further, say wilder and wilder things, until Lupin finally snapped and said something mean. It would be a kind of reassurance to know he was capable of it, that he wasn’t perfect. Finally, Remus looked back up to meet Sirius’s eyes.  “Well, that could take years.” 

[always-pining]

Wolfstar reunion 1979

Studied from a painting I saw on Pinterest