amztalksshit - Tumblr blog

[amztalksshit]

Had no one to speak to so ill just vent here

my mom married my dad in hopes of having a better life (it was an arranged marriage) she was on of the first women who got the chance to complete her degree and even had the chance to study abroad, but she fell into the trap being told to get settled. Soon they found my dad for her she married him thinking he was well educated and would support her career too. Damn she was so wrong idk what exactly happened cuz I was never told the whole story just bits and parts but my dads parents or my so called "grandparents" are quite backward they would verbally abuse my mom until she could no longer take it. When she was pregnant with me she went back to her hometown and for an year or so she and I lived with my maternal grandparents although I obviously don't remember it I just know it was a much happier time. Then my dad had come to visit me and it was about time my mom thought of me as in she figured I needed a father so she went back with them plus she thought they would change since I was born. Unfortunately that wasn't the case it got even worse she loved my dad that was certain. They had another child my sister, and then again one more in the hope of a boy but nope it was one more sister back then we weren't aware of anything we jus thought we were a happy lil family. As we grew up we noticed the constant arguments and it really affected us. This is hard to talk about but once we witnessed my dad and his parents dragging my mom onto the bed and beating her up I don't remember much but she had terrible bruises the next day. It happened once again many years later but i was able to stop my dad. Now seeing how terrible this was we started being distant from him and he realized for good how terrible he was. We have only seen improvement from then he has become so so so much better and I'm glad after all he was raised by his parents and was never taught what was right or wrong...…I do love my dad he genuinely cares for us and it evident but I don't want to forgive him I cant believe him I feel guilty for loving him and at the same time guilty for hating him idk how to deal with this... During his childhood he had to go through a lot by a lot i mean so much that he worked his ass out to get out of his own house except he was a mamas boy and always went back to them.

I miss my maternal grandparents I never got to spend much time with them we weren't allowed to frequently visit them. It hurts that good people are taken away first. My grandma would have cherished me and my siblings so much and we wouldn't be missing on bed time stories or them protecting us from those lil quarrels with mom , her and my grandpa would have took great care of my sisters. My youngest sister couldn't even meet them more than a couple of times she would have known what a real grandmas love would be like. My fathers parents are horrible they drink, smoke chew Tabaco all day and we cant do anything about it. They have threatened to kill me just cuz i spent time hanging out with my friends or just even talking to boys. They have threatened to file a case on my guy friends for hanging out with me what's more ironic is that my grandfather has worked under a court .What's tough is that I live in a society where everyone has been able to experience freedom, all my friends have such better families I get jealous when they go to the mall or just to a near by park when everyone gives birthday wishes with a hug I have to give them and even receive them on text even if we live beside each other. I feel shameful to live in such a family where both my parents are extremely well educated but still live like this I'm sorry ik there's much more important problems out there but I think we deserve our women rights starting from home. p.s ignore mistakes if any and thank you so much if you have made it all the way to the end cuz I doubt anyone would read this I have like 0 followers lmfao uh and don't think imp asking you to pity me i should stop talking shit...goodnight stay safe!<3

[amztalksshit]

Hello! tryna make a banner for this tumblr any ideas? also free feel to leave tips and suggestions or even constructive criticism, I'll do my best to improve :)) also its going to be a little scuffed so bare with me...

[amztalksshit]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[amztalksshit]

somehow I got 95/20 on an assignment

I hope they never fix it and leave it this way forever

[amztalksshit]

Challenges and struggles we face...

We don't have to face the challenges you have faced but that doesn't mean our challenges are non-existent, they might be different from yours, they may not be as difficult as the ones you have faced but they are valid. They judge us, pressurize us to always succeed but they never prepare us for failures, saying ''even if you fail we love you'' isn't gonna help, teach us how to handle it, teach us to not feel guilty, teach us to overcome it. I hope that each one of you can voice yourself without being looked down on. Yes, we are grateful for the sacrifices you have made for us but what is the point in those sacrifices if you don't believe us. In this fast-paced world, let us take a break or two or even three. One might be extremely fast at anything they do while one will be slow but if we want to we can achieve anything we would like to. It is unbelievable that we live in such a well progressed world but yet many do not have the choice to do what they want, those who are trapped work hard and get out of it no one is going to help you but yourself. Ending this by asking everyone who has read this to know that you are not the only one struggling but your struggles are just as valid as anyone else.