an-eddy-in-the-river

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anyway just a reminder for the myth lovers out there

king arthur was welsh. merlin was welsh. camelot was in wales. the lady and the lake she pops out of; welsh. excalibur; magic inanimate welsh object. etc.

on the way to see family, i drive past a lake that in which is welsh legend, is the last resting place of excalibur.

i’m just saying in my experience a lot of these legends had been so anglo-fied in the past and it’s like, all this cool shit is celtic welsh legend.

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at meal times i like to use my molars to crush seeds and fibrous vegetables, while my incisors handle any puncturing or tearing required

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well, well. you thought it would be fun having an icecreamgirl gf. you thought it would be cool that she's plural and has three flavors. now she's trying to conquer europe, and you come crying to me

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8 delicious batteries

Please refer to the graph

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literally so embarrassing to have someone go "i don't go here" or "what's this from?" on my art and it's a rarepair/crackship that is in no way representative of the source material... and i have to be like. well you see, the rest of the restaurant's menu is not like this. i'm doing my own thing eating black olives right out of the can in the back-of-house. whether or not you want me to throw you a can, you have to understand that's not what they serve out front

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t shirt that says "my body is NOT a machine, I wish it was, I could fix it"

and the back says "I own many screwdrivers"

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Anyone wanna spread animal ears like a fungus together

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He charges you then has a heart attack before he can tell you anything he found.

All your preparations are always for nothing. You prep for a test, it's canceled the next day. You make lunch, everyone's already eaten. You dress for a night out, the club's closed that day. You hire a private investigator to find out why.

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I just want you all to know. When I'm sitting there staring at a screen, doing nothing while entropy takes the word I've constructed around me. The part of me that is currently speaking to you is standing beside my living corpse screaming at it like Shia LaBeouf.

people who dont experience it cannot comprehend how awful executive dysfunction is. I WANT to do the task, i have the resources TO do the task, i will feel better having DONE the task

but i cant fucking do the task

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Rain World art month day 1: Noodle flies!

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In the distance you see a blue lizard get knocked off a wall by a squidcada it was trying to catch.

The squidcada immediately flies into a pole plant.

TC: Er... I guess that's what it gets.

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Begging everyone on the internet to stop smoothing out their middle aged men and draw wrinkles for the love of god I promise it's so fun you'll love it Come into my wine cellar

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Frothing at the mouth every time I see a sex ed resource that says "use condoms" without any further elaboration. "Condoms prevent STIs and pregnancy in the vast majority of cases when used correctly" but then they don't talk about what correctly IS

Correct use of a condom means

Using the right size, because if it's too big it can slide off or leak and if it's too small it can break or come off. Condoms usually come in 5 sizes, I'm sure you could find others outside of that as well but in ten years of sex work I found they covered everyone

Using lube, even if you think you don't need it. With the exception of oral sex, condoms should always be used with lube, 100% of the time. Most important lube should be applied to the outside but a drop in the tip of the condom before putting it in is also a good idea

Being mindful that latex is prone to wearing out, being damaged by heat etc. Condoms should be kept somewhere cool, not folded in wallets or sat on in back pockets and should be changed between activities and after about 15 minutes of any vigorous activity. Ask me how I know (a condom snapped on my leg when a client was pulling out, because I didn't change it when I should have)

The penetrative partner should hold the base of the condom when they pull out, and should do so immediately after they ejaculate so the condom doesn't leak or come off as the penis gets flaccid

Bonus: a lot of people think hand stuff can't transmit STIs. Wrong! If you give your partner a handjob and then touch yourself you can get HPV, herpes (low risk), and infections like chlamydia and gonorrhea

This isn't meant to be stressful, and the most common STIs are the most treatable - and often curable - but getting gonorrhea in your eyes after a facial still extremely sucks and yet no one talks about the fact that any mucous membrane can be effected, not just your genitals (yes this includes your mouth and throat)

In ten years of doing sex work where I saw 10 clients a day most of the time I've had 4 condom fails ever. One was what I mentioned above when it snapped on my leg, one was a client on top of me didn't get off fast enough after he finished and the condom came off, and the other two were a Glyde brand magnum that was inexplicably twice the thickness of a regular condom and didn't stay put on anyone so I suggest just avoiding Glyde entirely (their water based lubes also stain fyi). With all other brands correct use = extremely safe

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🥰 is truly the best emoji there is it can be used for a myriad of different occasions like for example when you see a bird or when you hear a bird or when you think of birds

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Two brothers , a planet fractured

This feels like a reference but I can’t for the life of me figure out what it’s referencing! Great name though.