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the tragedy of tumblr is you will inevitably meet people who you should be having a sleepover with. you should be rolling around on their floor and rummaging through their fridge and watching shitty movies with. you should be shopping with should be going out to a cafe with should be wandering through the aquarium with. people who you should be experiencing quotidian joys with... and you cannot! because they live one million miles away

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worst most clumsy things cas could say:

“i care… i have equipment”

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for the lost ep titles game: "something nice back home" s4e10, i think.

no rush no pressure but i'm now very curious. what will u create this time? heheheh

thank you so much, this was a great title selection :)

couldn't help but write some s4 era domestic jate for this one, and i went with a pretty similar vibe as what we get from most of that ep. i love seeing jack and kate talk about their parenting abilities in particular. for one, i always find it really sweet and healing, but more importantly it's just sooooo delicious for them to be having these convos about the child they literally KIDNAPPED lmfao. the contradictions!!!!

anyway, here it is! hope you enjoy :)

Like Yesterday

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the line of reasoning i'm following is this one: lie/truth and fiction/reality which is very simple but it's not easy because sometimes the lines get blurred, sometimes the distinction between what constitutes lie/truth and fiction/reality is way too strict. I'll give it a try, though.

very broadly speaking, before S15 Chuck, only Sam and Dean (and all the other hunters/people who know about monsters, ofc) were actually living in Reality while the rest of the world was, as a matter of fact, living in Fiction. There were two worlds and the knowledge about monsters was the prerequisite to access one world (Reality) from which one could never, EVER, go back. Like, once you know that monsters are real there's no "new normal" like Michelle tells Dean in "Red Meat". So, in a sense, the Reality of Sam and Dean (and the hunters and the victims of monsters who discover the truth etc.) with all its horrors served the purpose of sustaining the Fiction for all the other people. Therefore, in the world of SPN, the only reason for Reality to really exist was for... making it possible for Fiction to exist. Like, all these people living in the Reality lead a miserable and quite dangerous life (to very varying degrees, tbh) so that people could "happily" and unknowingly live in their Fiction. In other words, there is an issue of knowledge here. Sam, Dean and the others are the ones who keep the knowledge among themselves and only reveal this knowledge when it's necessary because there's no returning from it. Once you know, your access to Fiction is lost forever and they think it's their job to keep safe&protect people from this knowledge (which is debatable but pointless for the scope of my ramblings bc in-universe this is a Fact).

However, however, that doesn't mean that those people living inside Reality don't have access to fiction with the lower case "f". Sam, Dean and the other still have their human right to access their ability to create their own fictions. They still have their "what if" skill, aka they can still try and imagine different outcomes for their lives.

So when Chuck reveals that there is no Reality because it was ALL a Fiction, what's really happening is that we're forced to mourn the death of fiction (with lower case "f") itself. If inside Reality access to Fiction was lost forever, access to fiction was not. So Reality, in and of itself, was never really an issue because the ultimate purpose of Reality was to keep the Fiction intact and everybody inside Reality was already aware of that. With Chuck, then, the thing that ceases to be Real is not Reality (because it already served Fiction), but fiction (lower case "f"). Chuck subsitutes his own Fiction with these people's personal fictions.

In light of this, when Dean says "Nothing about our lives is real" what he's really saying, then, is that their lives have stopped their purpose of serving Fiction and that's more or less okay but, more importantly, that they've ALSO lost access to their own fictions. It's not about whether their lives are actually theirs or not, it's about whether their fictions are theirs or not.

What happens when Chuck is revealed to be the author is that the fictions the characters had created to make sense of their own lives inside Reality cease to be theirs, so, in a way, they cease to exist as they were. That everything that was done in order to sustain Fiction was pointless, not because it wasn't Real, because of course it was, but because, it turns out, it wasn't a problem of Reality but a problem of Truth. The only thing that is discovered to be True is not Reality, not even Fiction, but it's the fictions Sam, Dean and the others had created for themselves.

lately i'm flirting with the idea of seeing s15 Chuck acting towards Sam and Dean just like Sam and Dean usually act towards "normal" people. I mean, these two come to town one day, knock on someone's door and then, in one way or another, proceed to completely destroy someone's perception of reality. Yeah, sorry to inform you but monsters are, like, real-real. Fiction bursts into reality in the worst possible way and there's nothing anybody can do about it. Unless you're Doug. In that case you could just dump your girlfriend/coworker and pretend that nothing ever happened.

Chuck does something very similar but way worse to Sam and Dean because what Chuck really does is taking away from them their claim to fiction. Like, it's just so much more interesting if I look at Chuck as someone who's not appropriating Sam and Dean's perception of reality, rather their right to fiction.

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Tumblr isn’t uniquely full of moralists it’s just one of those terrible truths of any society that most of everyone has to be a moralist. Tumblr *is* uniquely full of people that label themselves Agents Of Chthonic Devilry while operating as campus police though

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Me and the mutual I pulled by being actually I have no idea why they followed me but I'm glad they did

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Archangel Michael, attributed to Raphaël Sadeler I (c. 1600)

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I have this theory Dean only let Meg drive the Impala to get back at Cas for kissing her

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theirs was a rocky start but it's not lost on me that, sudden, weird, passionate kiss aside, cas could see meg's true form and call it "thorny beauty" after she roleplayed as a nurse for him back in that mental hospital. and, if that wasn't enough, when cas got back from purgatory and naomi's brainwashing he still looked at her and her crazy, dirty, greasy, badly died hair and was like "oh yes of course, I will move furniture with you, absolutely".

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me: hey 

tumblr classics major who really likes halsey and thinks that the romantic poets were the only people to ever make contributions to english literature: you once made flowers grow within my ribcage but you were like icarus flying too close to the sun and your ichor wings are melting and now divinity stains your bronze fingertips like a pomegranate and you are holy holy holy 

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also thinking about rowena studying under letitia di albioni, the milanese witch. i wonder where the inspo came from, witches are kinda big in milan, also tarots and magic, generally speaking.

also the idea of rowena in milan in whatever century just fills me with joy.

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lately i'm flirting with the idea of seeing s15 Chuck acting towards Sam and Dean just like Sam and Dean usually act towards "normal" people. I mean, these two come to town one day, knock on someone's door and then, in one way or another, proceed to completely destroy someone's perception of reality. Yeah, sorry to inform you but monsters are, like, real-real. Fiction bursts into reality in the worst possible way and there's nothing anybody can do about it. Unless you're Doug. In that case you could just dump your girlfriend/coworker and pretend that nothing ever happened.

Chuck does something very similar but way worse to Sam and Dean because what Chuck really does is taking away from them their claim to fiction. Like, it's just so much more interesting if I look at Chuck as someone who's not appropriating Sam and Dean's perception of reality, rather their right to fiction.

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This image was captured last weekend at Malin Head, County Donegal, during Storm Éowyn.

Pic. Michael Mc Daid S Photography

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pessimysm

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The Pervert's Guide to Cinema (2006)