antihbki

[antihbki]

People won't believe your words.

so show them hers.

https://archive.is/FmrsA

Thank you. To everyone seeing this, please check out the archived post. Here is the direct link; https://archive.is/FmrsA

This is extremely important.

[antihbki]

Hi. I am here to discuss the tumblr users @/kotocest, known mainly in the radqueer community as Ciel, and his girlfriend @/radikyuu, who is known mainly as Kyuumi or Opphie.

Potentially triggering content ahead. Please read forward with caution.

I met Ciel and Kyuumi in September of 2023. I met Kyuumi first in a syscord/system discord server (which I will not be naming for the safety and privacy of the staff and server members), and was later introduced to Ciel.

From the start, it was obvious things were a little off. Kyuumi would often vent in the previously mentioned server about feeling gross or horrible about doing things or behaving a certain way and included that she doesn't think she could change because "he" wouldn't like her anymore. A little down the line, I found out that "he" was referring to Ciel.

Her vents weren't the only concerning aspect, though. It was clear how unstable she was when Ciel wasn't around or when someone said something about him that ticked him off. Anytime someone pointed out his toxic behavior towards her, Kyuumi would get super upset and would eventually spiral and break down because of it. Ciel would use this to his advantage and claim that she experienced such strong feelings regarding him because she was a "part of him" or because she was a "clone" of him, which would only serve as a way for Ciel to strengthen the leash he already had on Kyuumi. These are still things Kyuumi still seemingly believes, which only leads me to assume that he is still pushing this belief onto her.

There would be numerous occasions of Kyuumi coming to panic to me in DMs about these things, too. One time was especially alarming, and I am only comfortable talking about this because she herself has publicly admitted to this situation taking place. Kyuumi messaged me around 2 in the morning, telling me that she thought she was going to die. Her messages were vague and barely readable, but from what I could understand, she had injured herself in some way and was losing a lot of blood. I told her to call an ambulance, to which she responded that she couldn't. After asking why, I was blocked. After hours of staying awake, waiting for her to tell me that she was okay, I received a message from Ciel at around 10 pm. He informed me that Kyuumi was in the hospital but claimed he didn't know what happened. I asked why she blocked me, but he told me he didn't know. The next day, he admitted to encouraging her to harm herself, saying that he never intended for her to be harmed so bad, but said he didn't know why she said she couldn't call an ambulance.

Fast forward to Kyuumi coming out of the hospital, I approached her about the topic and told her what I knew, and this was when she told me about Ciel threatening her into not calling an ambulance. According to Kyuumi, the two of them were in a vc when he encouraged her to do it. Here is a screenshot of what she said to me.

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While I am going to try to be neutral for most of this post, I fully believe that he was trying to kill her. This is not the only time something like this has happened.

As you can see in that last message, Kyuumi had told me before about the fact that she had sent pictures to him. She came to me after she sent them to him and told me about what she did, and said it made her feel disgusting and horrible about her body. When I tried to comfort her, she broke down and told me the things he said about her after he saw the pictures of her. She also told me about some transphobic behavior he was displaying. Here is a screenshot of her explaining that to me.

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I point this part out because Kyuumi is a trans girl. She mentions in the screenshot that she asked him to avoid making comments about that specific part of her, and he disrespected that boundary and made those comments anyway. After this, she was left feeling very dysphoric and did not speak to me much.

This part is especially upsetting because Kyuumi was closeted about being a trans woman at the time. She was going by he/him pronouns and was almost exclusively using masculine terms and publicly claimed to be a trans man, but Ciel and I (as well as one other mutual friend) were aware of Kyuumi's identity. Despite Kyuumi trusting Ciel with such an important part of her identity, he went out of his way to upset her and make her uncomfortable.

She forgave him for this situation very quickly, but this behavior from Ciel continued and went unaddressed.

I witnessed Ciel manipulate her on many different occasions, and he was comfortable doing it with me present. Oftentimes, when they would argue, he would briefly mention the argument to their mutual friends, but he would always paint her out to be the one in the wrong. This led to many of our mutual friends hating Kyuumi for a while, and we even had a group chat made for the purpose of discussing what we thought was Kyuumi being an abuser. After a while, and after multiple friends cut Kyuumi off due to her supposed abusive behavior, Ciel confirmed himself on a call with me that he had been portraying her like that with the goal of isolating her. I tried to speak up and tell him how wrong that is, but I was threatened with never hearing from either of them again.

I didn't believe that he would make her stop talking to me, but I didn't take any chances and instead spoke to a friend who went on to confront him. After xe confronted Ciel, xe was blocked by both of them and removed from all of their group chats and servers. As far as I can tell, this is still something he has her do (cutting off people who call him out or who he doesn't like).

Ciel's emotional and physical mistreatment and abuse of Kyuumi is something that I have kept my mouth shut about due to the fear of being cut out of Kyuumi's life, but that ended up happening about a month ago anyways. I no longer have contact with her or Ciel, but given some of the things I have heard about their relationship, this abuse is still going on, and Kyuumi has begun to claim it is consensual.

I am not expecting this to be spread or have much attention paid to it, but I made this because I am tired of being quiet.

Thank you for your time.