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[aphprovincesheadcanons]

How would you describe some of the northern states, appearance and personality wise?

buddy this is a blog for Canada’s provinces, run by a Canadian, who has never stepped foot within the U S of A in his entire life. I’m pretty confused.

You’re better off going to a states headcanon blog, like @aphstatestalk, @aggressivelyfreedoms, @hetalia-america-headcanons etc. They’re all awesome, pretty underrated for the most part and you should definitely check ‘em out!

I’ll be honest, though - this sounds fun, so I’m doing it anyway. Going off on my (very limited) knowledge of the states, their history and stereotypes.

New York:

Male. Scrawny build. Olive skin. Short, curly dark hair. Blue eyes. Very talkative. A bit snobbish. Loves both the big city and the outdoors. Major workaholic. Lives off of apples, pizza and coffee. Will fight Ontario. Will also fight anybody who assumes he’s only New York City.

Maine:

Female. Sinewy build. Whitey McWhiterson. Long reddish-brown hair pulled back in a ponytail. Bluish-green eyes. Delicate appearance, is actually quite tough and outdoorsy. Loves lobstah, trees and the ocean. Doesn’t get along well with Québec, aside from their similarities (pretty, outdoorsy, logging, harsh weather) and mutual hatred of France & Massachusetts.

Vermont:

Female. Stocky build. Fair skinned with freckles. Short blond hair. Dark green eyes. Lumberjill and/or farmer. Seems sweet and humble, but can be rude and rough-around-the-edges. Hikes in the hills and mountains a lot. Loves ice cream and maple syrup. Québec’s little sister, having been ceded from QC’s land.

New Hampshire:

Male. Skinny build. Fair skinned. Short, messy red hair. Light grey eyes. Godless lumberjack. Incredibly impulsive and doesn’t like being told what to do. FREEDOM. Favourite season is autumn. Loves skiing, pumpkin pie, hiking in the mountains, and cats.

Minnesota (MN is northern, right? No?):

Female. Tall, chubby build. Light brown skin. Platinum-blonde hair, pulled back in a braid. Light blue eyes. Cheerful, hospitable, sort of passive-aggressive, pretty much every sentence that escapes their lips is a massive understatement. Probably works as a doctor or nurse.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Who do you ship Manitoba with (if you ship them at all)?

I’d ship Mani with Minnesota or North Dakota, maybe Saskatchewan.

Saskatchewan should be fairly self-explanatory. Minne because of their close partnerships and relations economically, and ND because c’mon, these two share an international peace garden. 

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

My grandmas from pei and she can't swim and apparently no one else in the Maritimes can either so I have a headcanon that none of the Maritimes can swim. Even if they practically live on a boat sometimes...

I’d feel sorry for the Maritimes, honestly. Being surrounded by the ocean, fishing and boating for leisure and/or for a living 24/7 and not being able to swim? Sucks to be you, b’ys.

The other provinces, if they know about it, find it hilarious, if maybe kind of sad. Even if they may not admit it.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

PEI can outdrink anybody under the table.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

What would Saskatchewan and Alberta do together?

Football, hunting, drinking, stargazing, horseback riding, pranking Mani, BC and the Upper Midwestern states- you get the gist of it.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

February 10th must suck for Quebec. It was the day the treaty of paris (1763) was signed, which made France give up all the French NA colonies, and it was the day where Ont and Queb officially became the province of Canada.

Québ needs a hug, a maple lollipop and a litter of puppies.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Calgary and Toronto once had a fight over who could create the biggest deep-fried monstrosity.

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Québec has some of the lowest church attendance rates in North America. This doesn't stop Louisiana from dragging them by the ear to Mass during Christmas and Easter, though.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Despite being generally wild and rowdy, Alberta is actually very neat and tidy with their surroundings, which can come as a surprise to some people.

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Manitoba secretly loves beadwork, and they're a big fan of floral patterns.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Northwest Territories is a polyglot, to the point where it's almost ridiculous. (They have thirteen official languages, for cryin' out loud)

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

A few of the Western provinces collect model trains.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

HC Ont is the one who flirts so much that everyone knows how shameless they are, and Queb can't flirt for their life. Ont has to help them hit on someone.

oh my God yes

Granted, though, I wouldn't trust Ontario as a wingman if I were you. Doubly so if you're Québ.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Imagine Ont and Queb singing '16 going on 17' from 'The Sound Of Music.' I think Ont would be the one going on 17 and Queb would be the one going on 18.

👌👌 I love this

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Montréal's primary language is Franglais, occasionally sprinkled with words in Arabic and Italian and liberally punctuated with the word 'bro.'

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

Ontario sold bootlegged alcohol to the States during Prohibition. They've got some pretty whacked stories about their rum-running days.

[aphprovincesheadcanons]

If Scotland was rated the most beautiful country in the world, and Canada the third, what does that make Nova Scotia?

NS is too pretty for this world. 

B.C. is only slightly peeved by this.