aromanticdayout

[aromanticdayout]

opposite of a wife guy im a my friends guy. oh you like that flower thats crazy my friend literally gardens. oh you ate a bagel today thats crazy when i hung out with my friend we got bagels. oh you took a walk by some water that's crazy because a year ago me and my friend took this specific walk by the water and it was meaningful. phone screen of my friends. always talking about my friends. starting to think nobody else has my friends in the same way that i have my friends and im really sorry about that you know what i mean

[aromanticdayout]

AROMANTICISM ISN'T ASEXUALITY BEING ACE DOES'T MAKE YOU ARO AND VICE VERSA STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP ENFORCING THE SOCIETAL IDEA THAT SEX AND ROMANCE ARE FUNDAMENTALLY INEXTRICABLE

[aromanticdayout]

TO ALL AROMANTICS:

*Amatonormative romance, conforming to typical ideals of romantic partnership

I’m an aroace guy trying to take a census of how many of us are partnering vs non-partnering. Please reblog to increase reach!

[aromanticdayout]

Being aroallo is hard.

That’s it. That’s the post.

[aromanticdayout]

EDIT: This meme is not about aroace people who are sex/date favorable. It's about the people who are constantly using "aroace can still date/have sex" to erase the representation of aroaces that don't feel that way. I don't believe romance/sex repulsed aroaces are better or "superior" to those who are.

[aromanticdayout]

Hi I'm one of those romance-favorable aros that people keep bringing up and I'd just like to say:

Stop using my identity to invalidate my aro siblings

And if you're truly set on making aro characters romance-favorable, then do that!

My experiences are not the same as someone who is alloromantic just because I'm romance-favorable. You can't just slap 'romance-favorable' on an aro character to write them how you would an allo.

Have them grapple with being in a relationship and feeling guilty that they don't feel what their partner feels. Have them have tough conversations with their partner over how they feel and their specific limits. Have them fight the internalized arophobia they feel that tells them they can't really be aro if they're in a romantic relationship.

But for the love of God, stop just slapping 'romance-favorable' on aro characters to ignore the fact that they are aro.

[aromanticdayout]

Starting off small: friendship isn’t inherently romantic

Getting bigger: living together isn’t inherently romantic

Even bigger: going on dates isn’t inherently romantic

Getting larger again: kissing isn’t inherently romantic

Oh my god is this too big: having sex isn’t inherently romantic

[aromanticdayout]

was brave and talked to my boyfriend today about how i been fighting w one side of my brain being arophobic to me and making me doubt that im doing/feeling enough in our relationship and his response wss basically "yeah iwl me too", what a relief, what joy

Aro4Aro relos be wilding

[aromanticdayout]

aro culture is being the one all your friends go to for dating advice because you can view is from an outsider's perspective and this apparently makes it more reliable

.

[aromanticdayout]

aro culture is LOVING FRIENDSHIP. I LOVE HAVING FRIENDS I LOVE HANGING OUT WITH MY FRIENDS AND BEING SILLY TOGETHER HELL YEAHH

.

[aromanticdayout]

Aro culture is feeling a difference between couples who are just couples and couples who are friends, and that (subjective) distinction is often the determiner for if I'm annoyed by it or not. Idk like you gotta be able to shut off the romance switch and be chill (+ not single out your partner as the only person you seem to care about) or else I'm lowk not hanging around you.

now i am wondering how many alloromantic people might be aplatonic and not know it

[aromanticdayout]

The "wait I might be asexual" to "idk am I?" to "wait you're supposed to be able to tell the difference between romantic and platonic feelings?" to "I'm aroace" to "I'm aro and I'm not sure about the other one" pipeline

[aromanticdayout]

When i am tryna find a song about being aromantic and all the songs are like...

I don't like romanceeee~~~

**pause**

BuT i LoVeeEeEe hiMmMm~~

Like, every song is like "I don't believe in romance but this random guy is the exception"

SORRY NOT SORRY...

yeah, it kinda sucks.

[aromanticdayout]

okay update: ive gotten over myself a bit idk what this panic was about maybe it was hormonal, maybe it was because i was just so sleepy and exhausted from busy life that week but ive read some posts from partnering allos and i got some advice here in the reblogs (tysm again <3)

think i just needed to calm down tbh. Yes i like him, i like spending time with him hes v fun and kind and a genuinely nice person. I dont have any aspirations to build a life with him or anything at this moment but im enjoying having him in my life right now and hes enjoying me being in his life right now and i think thats all that matters actually.

i just got too in my head about not feeling or acting similar to how my two besties who are both alloallo act about their partners but Obviously itll b different for me, im aromantic. (and i also had to remind myself he knows im aro, hes 100% okay with it and knows what it means, and hes said he thinks he might be on the aro spectrum too) so idk what i was worrying about there idk got in a tizzy hahaha all good now tho!

fellow aromantic people in relationships, how do you know if you want to be in a relationship? how do you deal with feelings fluctuating?

because ive been casually dating this guy for months now and we only just made it official a few weeks ago and now i am just hyper aware that all i feel for him is platonic, despite fully letting him know throughout that im aro so its not a secret but idk i feel weird abt it now, like i should be more excited to see him when i do or should feel more than i do, now that hes my Boyfriend and all

idk i just feel like id like some insight in how i know if im just dealing with a Me issue of internalized arophobia or if i should break up w him or what, bc how do you know if you should just be friends when just friends is all you can ever feel for someone

i do really like him, and i enjoy spending time with him, ig im just hyper aware of how different i feel that

[aromanticdayout]

do people actually look at other people who they don't know at all and think "damn that person is hot, yeah i would have sex with them" like no shot, right? surely not. w h u t . like SURELY not.

[aromanticdayout]

The aromantic agenda is a good one.

Go and think about what kinds of relationships you want. Don't think about labels like romantic or platonic or sexual, think purely about what relationships would make you happiest.

When I realized I was aromantic, I was asked things like "Would you still date? Would you have a QPR? Will you ever kiss?"

But the aromantic community didn't ask that. Instead, they focused on "What do you want in a world where anything is possible?"

And I realized I want to be alone, surrounded by friends and family I love who are close enough, I can bring them fresh baked scones when I overbake.

They asked me "What do you want?" and the question was so broad, I could weigh labels in my hand like queerplatonic partner and nonpartnering and significant other. I could look at these and shrug and say, "What I want is to not worry about questions I don't care about." I could shelve these indefinitely. Maybe even forever. And just enjoy being myself.

The aromantic community celebrates exploration. Tells people asking if they are aromantic, "This is a personal decision. Your personal decision. If this label helps you, take it. If this community helps you, stay as long as you need. You don't have to be labelled anything, aromantic or otherwise, unless it would bring you comfort. You don't have to be anything you aren't."

It's a good community with good philosophies born from a unique experience, not rooted in missing out, but in being forced to consider what you want when you don't want what's expected.

[aromanticdayout]

fellow aromantic people in relationships, how do you know if you want to be in a relationship? how do you deal with feelings fluctuating?

because ive been casually dating this guy for months now and we only just made it official a few weeks ago and now i am just hyper aware that all i feel for him is platonic, despite fully letting him know throughout that im aro so its not a secret but idk i feel weird abt it now, like i should be more excited to see him when i do or should feel more than i do, now that hes my Boyfriend and all

idk i just feel like id like some insight in how i know if im just dealing with a Me issue of internalized arophobia or if i should break up w him or what, bc how do you know if you should just be friends when just friends is all you can ever feel for someone

i do really like him, and i enjoy spending time with him, ig im just hyper aware of how different i feel that