artem-on-the-moon

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apologies if this has been done before but

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isopods

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hey if you don’t mind could someone identify this lovely little friend?

Found in western Washington, early May, after I was looking at some clovers patches

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landlord; this is the apartment complex

me (very smart); complex? heh. I get it: mini house in big house.

landlord; your credit score is in the negative thousands.

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people will say "why cant the eldritch gods just be nice to humans :((" and then kill a bug for existing near them

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Who up munching and crunching?

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My favorite jokes are about mispronouncing philosophers' names but I'm afraid it's a nietzsche subgenre

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a little concerned about Wade

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t-shirt that says ‘I LOVE BEING ALONE IN QUIET DARK PLACES.’ on the front and ‘I AM NOT A FUNGUS.’ on the back.

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It is possible that somewhere off the coast of Newfoundland there is an iceberg shaped like a giant dick.

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it's getting warmer and I just saw a bug. I'm so excited you guys. I'm so excited. I love bugs. they came back. they're back dude, I'm so excited

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"OK" SO IT SEEMS AS THOUGH MY GENETICALLY MODIFIED KILLER BEETLES HAVE ESCAPED. HAS ANYONE SEEN MY FUCKI🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲OH G🪲OD🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲 SHI🪲🪲T🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🧪AAAHHHHHHHHOOOHhh Hey. That One Learned thge basics of Chemistry . #Proud

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whoa I just realized it’s called deodorant because it de-odors you like it takes away your odor and you’re an ant

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i love poison omelette

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Wizards are not naturally immortal, in fact creating their own form of immortality is their graduate thesis.

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my favorite coworker told me the scenario she thinks of to fall asleep is she stumbles upon a baby sheep and has to raise it and it grows up and she has to shear it and she says she envisions shearing it so carefully that she always falls asleep at that part

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