asinusxasinorumxhortus

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(Ben Solo/Kylo Ren has finally been moved over to @solo-returned but I’m playing him very canon divergent this go around)

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Update!

Tom has been moved over to @enigmaticheir and Akechi has been moved over to @deuspascitcorvos

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(Dunno if I’ll ever actually bring this blog back, but there are a couple of muses on here that I wanna try and revive, maybe on their own blogs? Dunno yet. Tom Riddle is definitely one of them. So is Goro Akechi. The others I really don’t know. *insert shrug emoji here* Gonna see if I can reserve some urls, maybe screw around with some new icons?)

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Real lawyer plays Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney

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-🐺 for a starter where my muse is a werewolf

-😈 for a starter where my muse is a demon (kind of demon can be up to the mun!)

-⚰️for a starter where my muse is a vampire

-💻 for a starter where my muse is a sentient AI

-☠️ for a starter where my muse is a zombie

-👻 for a starter where my muse is a ghost

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Casual reminder to all my partners;

                                    I am not fast.

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Villains with tragic backstories:

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Goro Akechi (@DetectivePrinceOfficial): Gonna go stand in a creek you guys need anything

Sumi Yoshizawa (@RedRibbons): Yeah I need you to find a leaf and gently set in the water and watch solemnly as it floats away

Goro Akechi (@DetectivePrinceOfficial): Finally a reasonable request

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Goro Akechi (@DetectivePrinceOfficial): Helpful grammar tip! Farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance!

Makoto Niijima (@MakotoNiijima): Who hurt you

Goro Akechi (@DetectivePrinceOfficial): My father did you not read the post

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Akira Kurusu (@JustJoker): The first rule of chess is you can make the pieces be friends. Or even lovers ;)

Goro Akechi (@DetectivePrince): Delete this

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@chopperpirate liked the thing!

Goro looked down at what appeared to be an anthropomorphic reindeer with an adorable blue nose, briefly wondering if he’d finally been driven mad enough to hallucinate something so strange. This being couldn’t possibly be a Shadow. That he knew for sure. They were in the real world, not Mementos. The young detective studied the creature for a moment more before deciding to bite the bullet and ask some questions. If he truly was talking to a figment of his imagination, then so be it.

“Hello there,” he politely greeted, the look of shock he’d previously worn flawlessly melting into the flustered yet pleasant smile of the Detective Prince. “I apologize for my rudeness. You just startled me, that’s all. Are you lost? You seem a little young to be wandering the streets this late at night.”

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Please reblog this if you’re someone who would be interested in roleplaying polyamorous relationships.

As someone who is poly, there is very little representation of my relationship structure in media/RP, and that’s sort of frustrating. I would like to find more people to rp this type of relationship with.

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~Like/reply for a starter from Goro Akechi~

|non-rp blogs, please don’t reblog|

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multi-muse blogs deserve the same respect as any other roleplay blog.

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People who use they/them pronouns are valid

People who use they/them pronouns are valid

People who use they/them pronouns are valid

People who use they/them pronouns are valid

People who use they/them pronouns are valid

People who use they/them pronouns are valid

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THINGS MARKIPLIER SAYS SENTENCE STARTERS

Am I supposed to be scared?

Bitch, what are you gonna do now?

Come on! Come at me! Get some.

Excuse me, but what the fuck?

Forgive and forget.

Fra - gi - le. Must be French.

Goddamn it you sack of tits

Hello, 911? I’m breaking into my neighbor’s house.

Hello, neighbor!

Hello, you look tired! Also stupid.

Hello? I’m new to the neighborhood.

He was just mildly concerned that someone was in his house.

Hey, that’s uncomfortably close.

He’s stuck in his own trap like an idiot.

I am not Benedict Cumberbatch.

I don’t know what that is but I think it’s really stupid.

I don’t know what the fuck happened there.

I don’t like this place at all. Nothing in this place is cool.

If I do that, I’m gonna die.

I know that sound. I know exactly that sound.

I played with all the doodaddies.

Is it never going to be daytime?

Is that a crime? Probably.

I still got your remote, bitch.

I still have the flashlight.

It doesn’t work - wait, fuck - does it? Oh, it does.

I think that was a lie.

It isn’t too weird of a thing to imagine.

I’m assuming I did something wrong.

I’m gonna get up there and do the thing with the people.

I’m just going to barge into your home, don’t mind me.

I’m just gonna go to bed.

I’m not in your house! You’re in my house!

I’m so lonely.

Just gonna steal his milk, and his broom, and his pot.

Let’s get a good look at that ass.

Let’s keep the lights off, I like to make it creepier.

Looks pretty wimpy to me.

No reason to be nervous, I’m a human just like you.

Oh, look - a skull.

Oh, this has not been taken care of.

Oh my God, he’s got a glue collection. At least I hope that’s glue.

OH MY GOD I GOUGED HER EYES OUT I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW I COULD

Okay, well that’s terrifying.

Ring around the rosie!

Screw you. Screw you a lot.

Take one more step, I’m gonna call the police.

That was a screaming head. Okay then.

That was rather profound - but did it have anything to do with what’s going on right now?

The land value in this town must be shit.

There is no reason to be upset.

There’s a key in an apple.

There’s been a lot of changes.

These look fun.

This apple is my goodwill offering.

This is awesome - freaky, but awesome.

This isn’t exactly a good hiding spot.

Uh oh - blood.

Well, I need to get inside.

What did I just get myself into?

What is this all about?

What was I supposed to do?!

What’s wrong with me?

Who be bangin’?

Whoop - shit, didn’t mean to throw that.

Whoosh - okay, whoosh.

Who’s knocking on the other side of that goddamn door?

Why am I here?

Why are there doors on the ceiling?

Why did I buy this house?

Why is his car crashed into his yard?

Why is it oozing?

Why is there a big demonic symbol on the wall?

Wire, wire, where do you lead?

Yay. Good for me. I did it.

Yes, good - yes excellent - the baby’s crying.

You are a trusting individual and I like that. I like that a lot.

You didn’t hear shit.

You know how much of a genius I am.

You know what? Come on, kill me, I don’t even care.

You’ll never have any control in your life.

You’re not allowed to be that fast.

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five word prompts

[inspired by this]

“actually… i just miss you.”

“alright, i’ll leave you alone.”

“and slowly… i was forgotten.”

“and then everything just disappears.”

“and where do i go?”

“anyone could tell from here.”

“are you finishing that or…?”

“are you stupid or stupid?”

“anything, just call me, okay?”

“bitch better have my money.”

“bro… that’s so… not cool…”

“but did you do it?”

“call me now. it’s urgent.”

“can’t you listen to me?”

“cross that. don’t answer that.”

“don’t even think about it.”

“don’t you dare walk away.”

“do it. i dare you.”

“did you think i forgot?”

“eventually… you just move on.”

“even if you still do.”

“everything will fall into place.”

“fight me, you attractive stranger.”

“for once, i need you.”

“for once… i was right.”

“for once… i was wrong.”

“forget i even asked you.”

“forget it. you fucking suck.”

“fuck’s sake, what’s your problem?”

“fuck off. i mean it.”

“give and take. that’s life.”

“great. perfect. nice. fuck this.”

“have you lost your mind?”

“hello? it’s me. i was-”

“hey… that wasn’t so nice.”

“here’s a glass of whatever.”

“how about a hug, hm?”

“how about you make me?”

“i haven’t forgot you yet.”

“i can’t be around you.”

“i don’t need you, really.”

“i don’t need this now.”

“is this your first time?”

“it’s just a cut, really.”

“it wasn’t me, i swear!”

“i said i love you.”

“just don’t fuck it up.”

“just… come back alive, okay?”

“just make sure you’ve eaten.”

“kick his ass for me.”

“killed him? wait, what, literally?”

“life really sucks. feel better.”

“letting go hurts… a lot.”

“let me live, will you?”

“no, i don’t need you.”

“nothing can hurt me now.”

“nothing matters anymore to me.”

“okay it was me… so?”

“people lie all the time.”

“pipe the fuck down, asshole.”

“please, you can’t die now.”

“please don’t leave me alone.”

“quiet. they can hear us.”

“quick! give me your phone!”

“quicker, you freaking piece of-”

“quit it or i’ll bite.”

“quit staring! they’ll notice us!”

"really? do i look stupid?”

“real smooth, tripping over air.”

“rise and shine, sweet thing.”

“rise and fucking shine, motherfucker.”

“seriously? give me a break.”

“so… what are we now?”

“so… did you miss me?”

“so… can we go eat?”

“so… when’s the next flight?”

“so… how did everything go?”

“sometimes, i wish you died.”

“so what? you did it.”

“time passes slower without you.”

“then what do you suggest?”

“the fuck? who are you?”

“then you tell me why.”

“this is not working out.”

“this isn’t what i wanted.”

“this is all a fucking disaster.”

“when did it all happen?”

“who knew you’d be here?”

“why do i even bother?”

“why do i love you?”

“why didn’t you tell me?”

“you’re just… so, so stupid.”

“you can’t be here now.”

“you look like an accident.”

“you really need to go.”

“you know who to call.”

"zero fucks given. next please.”