askalison-blog

[askalison-blog]

Should I bring back Ask Alison?

[askalison-blog]

You guys are amazing!

I am really happy to see that you really want my advice. I try to do my absolute best. I also try to think what I would do if I was in your situation. It sort of makes it a bit easier to think about it that way. And if you ever need someone just to talk to I am here. I am thinking about making an AIM or MSN account for anyone who just wants to message me to just talk. I know some people just need someone to listen. Remember; I am here for you. 

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Hello, so my boyfriend and I of about a year broke up a month ago. It was mostly because I got mad at him for not contacting me this one day (clingy I know.) But when I asked him why he didn't, he said, "When I'm not with you, I don't really think about you." And that just really hurt. So we met up later that day, I was really impulsive and said, "What's the point of being in a relationship if we don't feel the same way about each other?" I asked him if he wanted to break up, and he kept saying he did, but didn't want to at the same time. He was really indecisve. We ended up breaking up, but mutually because we thought it was best. Then a week later I thought I made a huge mistake and asked if he wanted to try again. He said no because he didn't want to make me go through more heartache. I really believe him. I know that he's not lying. But the truth is, I miss him so much. We see each other at school every day so we say hi and it's hard I want to tell him everything I feel. How much I miss him, how much I've been crying of him lately compared to before. How I really truly feel like I made a mistake. Our mutual friend said he still loves me too, but his feelings are still confused. Other people have told me not to talk to him about getting back together yet. But I feel like if I wait to long then he'll move on and forget.I know that's not really possible but I feel like I should talk to him soon? Is there any other advice.

Let things cool off for a bit longer. If he doesn't know what he wants then let him figure it out. If you continually pester him he may get the wrong idea and just stop talking to you all together. I know this may be hard to hear but if he moves on during that time then you might just have to get over it. Ever hear the saying "If you let someone go and they come back it's meant to be but if they don't they you must move on"? Well I think that counts here. To me it sounds like you two are in high school? If so, don't let a boy rule or ruin your life. I know right now it seems like the end of the world and you feel like you can't survive with out but trust me you can. Everyone is born alone, lives alone, and dies alone. You are you and only you. You are the only one in your own head living your life. You know? Like I said, if it's meant to be then things will find it's way. Just give him some time and see what happens.

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im moving 2000 miles away from my mom. i am starting high school next year. my sister is starting her senior year next year and because my parents dont want her moving for senior year, i am moving with my dad next summer and my mom is staying here with my sister next school year. i will only see my mom(my bestfriend) on winter break, summer break, and spring break. i dont know what i will do. my dad just doesnt get me and i cant do things with him i can with my mom. i dont know what to do

Awe, okay so I feel really close to this one because my mom is my absolute best friend. I don't know what I would do with out her. But shit happens, right? If your mom knows how to use a computer then make her sign up for a Skype account and tell her to Skype you when ever she wants and vice versa. I know it's not as good as seeing her in person but it's better than nothing. Plus it's better than just talking on the phone where you just hear her voice. I can't say it is going to be easy, because it wont be, but it may make things a little easier to deal with.

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To the person who sent me a three part question.

Don't worry I am not ignoring your question I am just answering the short ones first so I can answer your question with the best advice I can give. Not something half-assed because I want to get it done. But it is coming! I promise! :D

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This goes with the one you just answer. He hasn't hung out with me during the day, yet the times ive slept over at his frat room, i was there for a while in the morning, and many of his frat brothers came in and out of the room, and at some points he was still semi-cuddling with me and didn't budge. So I don't think he's hiding it or anything from people. at the parties the nights before I'd slept over he would hold me a lot around everyone at the party.

Alright well hmm. Maybe he just isn't ready for anything serious. If that's the case you just have to accept it. Boys are weird. I've said this a few times before but I will say it again; let him make the first move. If he wants something more he will make a move. 

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hi. me and my boyfriend have been dating for 5 months. he's 18 and i'm 15. we we were just gonna be friends at first, but we starting talking and ended up dating. i honestly love him, but i dont know if i can trust him. he had an ex girlfriend of 3 years and never cheated on her, but i'm just scared hes going to or when he goes to college he finds someone new. i just wanted to know if im going crazy, or is this like okay for me to be scared ?

It is perfectly natural that you are having these thoughts. However you never know how relationships are going to work out and you need to reason with that. But for now I say just trust him. That's the best thing you can do. And if the time comes and something does happen, not saying it will, break it off. He doesn't deserve you if he does something to screw it up. Just remember that.

Also, you are young. Don't let a boy rule your life. Make your own life. :)

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this guy i like always txted me first he does not txt me alot but he doesnt txt me a little bit its like in the middle but the other night i was at a party and i was drunk and i txted him first and i had to walk home with my friend and he kept on saying r u okay dont get hurt and he said that like & times. and he asked me to date him on this game on fb and im just really confused cuz today i found out he likes someone else :( andhes not the type of guy that flirts but sometimes he did..HELP:'(

First of all is the game Sims Social? I love that game! Anyway he honestly could just be trying to be a good friend you know? A lot of guys, good hearted guys, do that. And it sounds to me that you could just be getting mixed signals. Let it cool off for a while. If he is interested in your let him make the move first. Or he could like you as well as this other girl but he just doesn't know if you like him and he could be pursuing the other girl because of that. In that case when he texts you or talks to you in person flirt it up a little. Test the waters a bit.

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I dont know what to do. We are both in highschool and my sister, who is in an older grade, is upset because she thinks everyone uses her to get to me. She doesnt share this with me but she posted it on her tumblr and i ran across it one day.. I dont want her to feel this way. But i dont know what i can do. I dont want her to feel used my other people especially if i am involved. I love her to death and i just want her to be happy. What can i do to make her happy?

Well you may have to just let it run it's course. My younger brother and I went through the same thing. I am two years older than him and in high school he used to have guys act like they were his friends and then they would try to get to me through him. It was pretty obvious. This made my brother super upset. Eventually he got over it and realized worrying about it was pretty stupid. Just talk to her about it. Get her point of view of it and if you feel it's right, apologize for it even though it isn't your fault. It's still nice to hear. 

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my boyfriend and i have been trying to have sex but it won't work. i don't know how to like explain it. the first time he lost his erection cause he was so nervous (we're both virgins) but then the other night we tried again and he didn't lose it and it just wasn't working. he's really upset and i keep telling him it's alright, that we'll figure it out, but he keeps emotionally beating himself up for it. is something wrong with him/me or do we just have to keep trying til we figure it out?

Okay that is a hard question. I don't exactly understand what is going wrong. Is it just not going in or...something else. You know? But my advice to you, if it's just the not going in part, is to go to the store, Walmart(self checkout), and get a bottle of KY Lubricant or something along those lines. It's a big help. Trust me. If it's something else then feel free to message again. :)

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I've been in a relationship for nearly three years with someone I have been entirely faithful to and loved. But part of me has always loved someone else, and has done for over six years. Recently we started getting close, but then we argue all the time now and I've found out he likes me too. It's really confused me now as all these old feelings are stirring again and I'm becoming increasingly unhappy with not being able to be with him. What should I do?

Have you ever seen the Notebook? Or even the Wedding Date? Well there is a quote from the Wedding Date that says "I rather fight with you then make love with someone else". If you think this other guy is worth it then go for it. It's been to be happy with the one you truly love then forcing a smile for someone else. If your current boyfriend truly loves you then he would rather you be happy then upset. 

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Theres this guy, and Im gonna list some pros and cons and if you could analyze it, thatd be great! Pros- he's sweet to me, he seems interested, he likes to cuddle with me, we've had a three night streak of me sleeping over with him, he asks me what I'm thinking about when we're cuddling, he doesn't pressure me. Cons- I'm a frosh in college; he's a junior, apparently he's known for getting any girl he wants, we havent hung out during the day really, he could be playing me.

Personally to me he doesn't sound worth it. If you have been hearing things about him getting any girl he wants then it's probably true. It most like always is. And if you haven't hung out with him during the day it's probably because he doesn't want someone else to see you with him. I.E. another girl or something of the sort. Just tell him you want to be friends. If he wants something more he'll come after you.

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There's this guy who I've known for most of my life. Just recently we've started having feelings for each other. We recently slowdanced at a party and I loved it so much. But, he has all these girls chasing after him and though he tells me he doesn't care about any of them, I once found him all over one of these girls. This girl later asked him out and he said no, telling me that it was because of me. We've just become fuck buddies. I think I enjoy being fuck buddies, but maybe something more?

Okay, so let me be brutally honest. To mean it just sounds like he basically get's whatever he can get. You said he doesn't want anything to do with those girls yet he was all over one of them and that is what it sounds like to me; he just wants to mess around. A way to kinda see or test the water to see if he wants something more as well is to ask him what he thinks of you two and if he sees it going anywhere past what you are. Guys really like girls who will just be honest with them. Straight up.

[askalison-blog]

Hey there :) Umm, the other night this guy kissed me, he caught me completely off guard and I wasn't expecting it at all. Our friends were close by and I was really surprised so the first thing I said was "that didn't happen". Looking back I feel really bad about saying that now, like what if he got offended by it? He didn't seem to mind, we still chatted and stuff after. But I stress about things and I'm just worried he might have gotten offended or something.... This is a weird ask I know :P

Don't let it get to you. I mean plenty of us have seen movies where the guy kisses the girl and all of a sudden she goes "Whoa." Kinda like what the hell just happened. But if it really bugs you that much just go up to him and be all "Hey, remember when we kissed and I kinda muttered something? Well I didn't mean it in a bad way." I am pretty sure he get's it. You were shocked. We all are when something totally random happens. Like I said, I am pretty sure he get's it. 

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Thank you for your help (: Im glad I could confide to you, or anybody at all. Telling my girl friends, I get worried of annoying them with my rants :p It is hard to think of ideas.. I'm doing my best to think, he's as hard-headed as me. Talking to him won't work, actions will though. Ill keep you updated. -October

No problem love! :D Like I have said to plenty, I am here to help. And I know exactly where you are coming from that's why I made this blog so people would have a place to ask for advice and not have to worry about if they are ranting or being judged. :) I am totally nonjudgmental. Haha. Yes, let me know how it works out!

[askalison-blog]

Sometimes you just need to distance yourself from people. If they care, they'll notice. If they don't, you know where you stand.

[askalison-blog]