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[askthegemgrumps]

Okay so,,, Im just getting into this and I have no clue what’s happening can you help me with like backstories and such? Idk man

@dinah-kitty-52

Okay, 1? I love you, and I wish you luck surviving in this content desert.

I’ve scrolled through some of my old posts to jog my memory, so I’ll give you the best rundown that I can for not having used this blog in a while and having a computer with none of the old CG files. Most of my headcanons or speculations for this au line up with the general consensus for backstory and characters, but little things differ here and there.

Also, please note that some of this au’s content... didn’t age well... From my scan of the Crystal Grumps blog, a few people have technically been removed from this au (which I support) but I will do my best to report things as they were.

Arin: I think he’s a pink rhodochrosite? He was a gem technician on Homeworld and was tasked (I believe by Orange Diamond or Blue Diamond) to do experiments on fusing shattered gems. Arin quietly objected to the work at first but he did his job and made many half-formed abominations. However, he did have one truly successful experiment on Homeworld: the fusion of two gems named Sunshine and Zyanne. Two halves of two gems combined to make someone entirely new: Suzy. Arin defected with Barry and they landed on earth together (I’m pretty sure)

Barry: Orange Diamond. In this au there is no large revolution, but Barry leaves behind his life on Homeworld for reasons that I can’t entirely remember. I think he just wasn’t happy? Also, there was some messed up stuff going on behind closed doors (ninjas, Arin’s work, etc.). He befriended Arin over some time on Homeworld and they escaped together. I don’t think anyone ever made any content about Barry faking his own death like Rose Quartz from the main show, but he may have done it?

Brian & Dan: Brian is a bloodstone and Dan is a Cummingonite because we had to. They are elite warriors, specially produced gems made for their ability to move undetected and to strike before their enemy knew they had company. Dan and Brian are ninjas. They always come in pairs (I think that is well accepted but I can’t remember), so Dan and Brian have been together since the very beginning. However, ninjas have a more nefarious purpose beyond the murder on the tin- ninjas are supposed to kill so thoroughly that there is never a chance of their target reforming. Ninjas shatter and eat other gems. It’s thrown around here and there that ninjas need to eat gems but its honestly just used for angst. These boys can get real sad.

Holly: was a commander in the past? Uh, I’m pretty sure she was shipped with Ross because this was all like 3 years ago so things are very different now.

Kevin: Ok so Kevin was supposed to be some sort of Prophecy Gem? He was a special boy or something. For some people, he was shattered and the two halves of his gem were combined with other stuff to make Matt and Ryan of Supermega, but I never got on that train.

Jacksepticeye: Green Diamond. I can’t remember much about him but he was there.

Jontron: Was Blue Diamond. Slightly malicious but just missed Barry. No longer included in some of the main au sources and has no replacement.

MatPat: Peridot equivalent. I can’t remember how much actual characterization he had.

Mark: He was an amethyst soldier, Jasper equivalent. In some of my writing, he previously commanded Matt and Ryan.

Matt and Ryan: In my writing, they are a pilot and a soldier respectively. Other people had them as halves of the Propechy, created by Arin (I think) after Kevin’s death. People are weird around them, especially Barry as he and Kevin were so close.

Pewdiepie: Yes, I know. He was White Diamond and is no longer included in main circles of the au. I never touched him in the first place. No thank u.

Ross: Remember the ninja partner thing? here’s where it gets sad. Ross was a ninja, left in a kindergarten by mistake for a while with another gem who became his sister. They were ninjas without knowing it, and they were there as partners. However, Ross’s sister’s gem was defective and cracked, and eventually she shattered. He keeps her shards with him when he leaves the kindergarten to live with the Grumps. Dan and Brian figure out that he is a ninja and both try to protect him from the horrors of what he was supposed to be and at the same time try to keep him in check for his safety and everyone else’s. I also did some toying around that he had persuasive powers and that he could (unknowingly) influence gems with his emotions.

Suzy: Like I said before, a fusion of two broken gems from Homeworld. She doesn’t really remember either of her past selves and is pretty stable.

Also NateWantsToBattle is there? I don’t remember much about him.

I have to cut this off because I need to leave for class here in a minute, though I’ve basically covered everyone? Other people try to include other YouTubers of note, but I never did. This au needs a lot of polishing (get the joke?) to fit to 2020 game grumps and everything that has happened in SU/SU: Future (even though we don’t follow that source material too strictly) but I hope you enjoy whatever content is out there now!

I can’t cover the fusions today bc there’s a ton and I don’t remember most of them but they’re there too.

[askthegemgrumps]

sketching some things for an au of an au based on a certain four monarchs from a recent NSP video ;p

[askthegemgrumps]

Size comparison site!

FOR ARTISTS AND WRITERS WHO NEED IT IT’S AMAZING

I know some of you need this! (you don’t need to have giant or tiny characters either. it’s a great ref for everyone!)

[askthegemgrumps]

Barry got poofed. It was nearly impossible to believe. In Kevin’s eyes he was by far the strongest Grump. He is the strongest Grump in truth as well.

He was on a mission with Kevin, a one-on-one to help with training. The violet peaks of the mountains stretched high above both of their heads into the wispy clouds overhead. Kevin was absorbing the view when the earth shook beneath him and Barry. Rocks from peaks above crumbled from the mountain walls and began to rain upon the two gems.

“Kevin, watch out! It’s a landslide!” He leapt with incredible speed and power that Kevin would not believe, had he been looking. Barry shoved Kevin out of the way which caused the younger gem to stumble under an outcropping of rock. Barry, however, was not so lucky. He got crushed under the hail of stones and poofed almost immediately with a wheeze. Kevin waited for the landslide to end, and ran to the pile of stones that crushed his mentor and best friend.

He cried Barry’s name as he tore the heavy boulders away. Underneath the piles of boulders on the dusty ground was Barry. His shining gem was thankfully not cracked or scratched in the disaster. Boy, Kevin thought; Barry must sure be tough. He carried Barry gently in his hands down the slope to the warp pad when he tripped on a rock and flung his mentor’s entire source of being into the air. Kevin screamed Barry’s name again in disbelief that he was going to be the cause of Barry’s death.

But Barry’s gem didn’t hit the ground. At about 20 feet above the rocky ground, Barry’s gem froze. A white light grew out of it and took Barry’s form. Normally a reforming gem shuffles through their past forms in a memory slideshow. Barry didn’t. Had he never been poofed, or could he just hide his reformations? The latter shouldn’t be possible; it would take immense power that just didn’t exist in the Grumps; right? Just as Barry was about to completely form, his body flickered. It flickered again, and the light retreated into his gem, leaving what looked like a tiny body that was just larger than Barry’s gem itself and then exploded outwards into what looked like a Mega-Barry. His silhouette which was usually clothed in casual Earth clothes, changed into a short cape and a tasset that bloomed from the waistband of his pants. Barry came into his usual colors, and it was revealed that all of his clothes -spare his brown gloves and black boots- were differing shades of orange.

“B-barry? Is that you?” Kevin was not sure what to trust right now. Maybe he was hallucinating. Was his gem cracked? Maybe that was it: His gem cracked a bit and Barry is carrying him to Dan for some healing.

Barry’s shining carrot-colored eyes looked down to the young gem, his gem really. How was he so high up, anyways? He looked down at his palms. “Shit,” he whispered. That was too fast and now look what he did: he had reverted to his original form. It was a Diamond thing- they always had the option to reform to any past state as to not worry their underlings. “Kevin.” He stated gently. His voice sounded different too, like how it did back in the day. It was hard to sound gentle with his first voice, that was why he changed it. His first act of rebellion against Felix. “Kevin,” he tried again; thankfully sounding more like his normal and gentle self,” come here please.” He held a palm next to the rock ledge Kevin was standing on and the young gem stumbled bewilderedly onto Barry’s glove and leaned on his thumb for balance. Barry lifted his hand slowly and carefully until Kevin was at eye level. He spoke anxiously and confusedly.

“Barry, are you okay? What’s going on? Why are you so huge? Is this draining all of your energy? I tried to save you but I dropped you, I’m so so sorry Barry please for- “

“That is enough Kevin, it’s okay. Let’s just start going down the list. Yes, I am okay; this is more of an energy saver form really and it is not draining me at all. Thank you very much for taking care of me Kevin and accidents happen. It’d take more than a drop to hurt me. You might have noticed I left two question out because they are to be answered in tandem with each other. It is time for a story Kevin, and it is non-fiction.”

“Back on Homeworld, everything was ruled by four gems- the mighty Diamond authority. Felix was the oldest, known as Yellow Diamond by everyone spare his brothers. He was cunning, cruel, and logical. He cared little for affectionate companionship. The next oldest was Orange Diamond. He was the backbone Homeworld didn’t know it needed. He was just and kind and cared for his subjects. Then Jon, Blue Diamond: strong and resilient, dependable. A really good guy. Then the youngest, Jack; Green Diamond: passionate and naïve. He cared too much about his subjects and was too kind to those in need of punishment. He had to be broken so he would harden into a real diamond. He was broken and then he was. Easy. But Orange Diamond had seen enough, had enough. A rebellion was brewing and he wanted in. The news broke one morning: A Jasper soldier snuck into the chambers of Orange Diamond and assassinated the ruler and all of his pearls. The pearls were really given to the Green Diamond and the now- ‘dead’ monarch fled to spots where a rebel base was suspected to be located. He shrunk his form and changed his clothes to look like the others. He was just a soldier, that’s all. The rebellion came and went and he remained on Earth. He stayed and he will stay forever protecting the planet. Why do I know the stories better than anyone else who lives with us? Why do I say the least about my life and my beliefs? Why am I always giving everyone another chance? Because I am the Orange Diamond. Homeworld’s ghost. I chose Earth over my family and I don’t regret it, I have a new family now.”

Kevin knew the end of the story as it was progressing, it was obvious, but he hung on every syllable Barry said. His best friend and mentor was now so much more astounding to him. He had so much more energy and questions but knew they’d be best saved for later. Barry put him down next to the warp pad and shapeshifted himself back to his “normal” height and with the same outfit he’d left the Temple in. He and Kevin warped home with a hush and a wink and promise of more to come.

[askthegemgrumps]

This fusion could hold incredible power. Anything it asks could be graciously delivered, no matter what because THAT VOICE is so beckoning and smooth. Between the four gems, one of the voices heard when they speak suits them the best and thats all they hear

What if the scariest thing about them was they didn't really sound good? The four voices going discordant when speaking as one. But people and gems still fall prey to the giant fusion's siren voice.

if Mark, Mat, Dan and Nate fused, holy hell, their fusion would sound like an angel !

I was thinking of a name for this fusion and I was going to propose ‘Denmark’ but maybe that could be Dan and Mark’s fusion.

Yes. They would sound absolutely incredible. Everyone in a 50-foot vicinity would start crying when they speak or sing

[askthegemgrumps]

Barry hides about 50% of his strength in most missions. He slowly amps it up as the battles progress. He does this so he does not scare the other (newer) grumps.

[askthegemgrumps]

ok but imagine this

“19062889 (mark), you have been re-assigned.” It was an order from his higher ups. He wasn’t a researcher anymore, he was to be a soldier now until the end of his life. It wasn’t surprising with the rebellion kicking up. He was a quartz anyway; he only had his scientist position based on his above-average intelligence for a gem of his kind.

He was trained with new kindergarten gems. The training was grueling, but he could take it. All of his time in a lab had made him soft, that was all. Before long, he surpassed all of his classmates. He was admired by both warrior and general. Even though he hadn’t truly fought yet he was called the “ultimate Quartz”. He broke and set records for tests and drills, often surpassing his own records later on. Finally, Homeworld sent him to the front lines.

In all of his training, he wasn’t ready to shatter his first gem. He felt the crack under his boot and winced. He swore he could her a whine of grief and acceptance as he destroyed the life beneath his foot. The second gem was much, much easier. He was filled with adrenaline on the battlefield, a killing machine. He now didn’t hesitate as he crushed gems. Once, he crushed one in his mouth for the hell of it after hearing rumors of gem cannibals. The shards stabbed the inside of his mouth and tasted so horrible that he couldn’t place the words to describe it. He retched and tried to clean his mouth with his hands.

He was sent back home with honor and glory. At first, he thought that he had the best life possible. He controlled a small regiment of varied gems that had also served under Orange Diamond before being moved to Green Diamond’s jurisdiction. He missed Orange Diamond; everyone did. But life went on. The rebellion ended in what is described as a win or loss depending on who you asked. 19062889 didn’t care. He was offered his old job back and declined. This was who he was now, who he was made to be and he loved it.

Then one day, he was sent to Earth on a scouting mission with a confused and terse informant and a seemingly useless Era 2 peridot that had nearly failed his primary objective. He was never the same since.

[askthegemgrumps]

Sometimes, when he’s surrounded by loud sounds and is over-tired or over stressed, he gets “headaches”. He’ll sit still and hold his head in his hands and then out of nowhere, will yell. “SHUT UP, JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!” He flings himself back against his seat and groans. Everyone near is scared and worried, spare Brian, who does not audiate his pain.

Okay, I feel like someone has already done this, but whatever. Remember in the show how all the shards in the cluster desperately needed to form, like it was their one purpose? What if the shards in Dan and Brian are the same way. Constantly screaming "form, form, FORM!" and only our ninjas can hear it.

Oh, that’s a good angst.

[askthegemgrumps]

omg, imagine if someone poofs a gem in the temple, and they're only partially healed, and holly realizes it's one of her former soldiers (like in the centibeetle episode)

I’m betting she’d be frozen in tears as the corrupted gem screeches in agony.

It’s her fault, she’d tell herself.

(AHHHHHH)

[askthegemgrumps]

Holly ran into the bubble room of the temple. A monster had gotten popped, and it had reformed into a gruesome half-corrupted form. She spread her razor wings as the monster lurched towards her steadily. In agony, it cried out among garbled screams:

“Com…….Ma…nder… Com…Man……..der… He…lp….Me……”

Holly covered her mouth with her hands standing frozen in panic. “Im so sorry, soldier,” she choked out, kneeling near the dangerous creature, “You served me well and I am so, so-” a tear rolled down her cheek- “proud of you. Mama bird will make it stop hurting, okay? You’re gonna go to sleep for a little while.” The thing nodded the best it could as she stroked its head. She whispered an identification number into its ear as proof that she remembered exactly who her fallen soldier was. She stood up and launched a crystal feather that moved faster than a bullet in between its eyes. The fallen soldier’s physical form vanished. Holly bubbled the gem and carried it out of the bubble room and into hers, where she laid for a few hours after in tears and solitude. 

When Ross asked about the situation, Barry responded with “She lost a soldier. She lost a child. It’s… very difficult. Let her rest alone for a while.”

omg, imagine if someone poofs a gem in the temple, and they're only partially healed, and holly realizes it's one of her former soldiers (like in the centibeetle episode)

I’m betting she’d be frozen in tears as the corrupted gem screeches in agony.

It’s her fault, she’d tell herself.

(AHHHHHH)

[askthegemgrumps]

Disrupting the angst

After Mark’s saving, the Grumps find two less than happy scouts at the barn. An arrival, a found friend, and new rebels are the product of this bizarre turn of events.

Kevin, Ross, and MatPat hadn’t even reached the barn before they heard the annoyed gems that had been tied down by Nate. Holly and Suzy arrived at the same time, running from the nearest warp pad.

“Nate, this was the issue? It looks like you handled it well,” remarked Holly pleasantly. She raised an approving brow at the knots that the zircon had tied.

Matpat finally came up the hill and ran towards Nate shouting loudly in celebration and wrapping him in a hug. Nate stood stock still and shrugged, “I don’t want anyone surprising me.” His voice was mischievous and contained surprising hints of malice.

The tall, lanky gem with a smooth white cabochon of a gem on his shoulder spoke up. “Hey! You stinking rebels lied to us! We searched high and low for that Amethyst and he wasn’t there! You better have an answer or we’ll… We’ll…” He struggled against his bonds and tried to think of a way to finish his threat. He was a pilot, not a warrior! He shouldn’t do this stuff! When the white jade realized that he could neither free himself or think of a threat, he sighed.

“Who are you? What do you want,” demanded Kevin. He had been told that some of the other gems met two odd Homeworld soldiers recently, but he didn’t expect them to come back.

Ross denied the Homeworld gems a chance to speak. “They’re Homeworld scum Kevin, just look at them,” Ross spat.

“Hey, don’t be rude,” said the larger gem. He had some sort of quartz where his bellybutton would be, obviously a soldier. He didn’t come off as the brightest, which added to the Grumps’ guess of his status. “Our outfits are cool! My partner here is a white jade, a pale form of nephrite- a pilot. I’m his brawn: a citrine soldier! We serve under or-Green Diamond and our mission is to locate the amethyst leader of the failed Earth mission,” he finished his sentence and seemed proud of himself for doing so. “So? Where is he?” He snapped the ropes holding him and summoned a vicious looking knife which he used to set his companion free. Suzy, Holly, and Ross summoned their weapons; while Kevin, Nate, and Mat decided that it would be best for them to take a few steps back. The white jade summoned a puny looking energy gun (probably for last resorts) and held it up threateningly, even though it was apparent that he didn’t know how to use it properly. All hell was about to break loose, but a sudden and deep shout broke the tense standstill.

“Hey! What the hell is going on here,” shouted Mark. He looked surprised by the skirmish, he didn’t think there was anything out here. He slid down the hill and ran between the two opposing groups. He attempted to size up both parties, but was smooshed between the two homeworld gems.

“Mark! You’re okay! I can’t believe it!”

“I could; I knew you wouldn’t let those rebel clods shatter you!” It was impossible to tell who had spoken first, as both of their voices were muffled by tears and the fact that their faces were pressed into the amethyst’s chest. Mark took one arm off of the gems hugging him to wave at the excited Kevin, who asked if he was okay from afar. He also totally didn’t wave at Nate, who gave him the finger.

“Yeah,” he shouted over to Kevin. He looked down to address his apparent friends, and then up at everybody gathered there. “Yeah, boys, I’m alright. Dan healed me; saved my life. I’d be corrupted and dead if he didn’t come. I owe everything to him.” He stepped free of the new gems. “These shmucks are Ryan and Matt.” He pointed to each gem when he said their name: first the citrine and then the white jade. “They’re my friends from my ex-home. Yep, I’m leaving Homeworld behind- I wanna be a rebel like you guys!” Ryan and Matt gasped, and the assembled grumps were less than joyous. Nobody did anything for a few moments, until Holly stepped forward and extended a hand to Mark.

“It won’t be perfect at first, but we’d be happy to have you, Mark.” Mark shook her hand graciously.

“Matt, Ryan.” He turned away to speak to his friends. “I’m staying here. You don’t have to, but I am. If you stay, you won’t have to answer to Green Diamond. Remember those stories about Orange Diamond? That he faked his death to serve the Rebellion? The stories are true; he’s here. If you stay, you can be free gems, you can be whoever you want to be, and do anything you want to do,” he sounded a little more caring and knowing in those last few moments. He took their hands. “Please. Come with me.”

Ryan and Matt looked at each other. They had no reason not to, and their best friend was begging them. Matt spoke for the both of them. “Sure, Mark. We’ll stay with you on Earth.” Mark wrapped them in a bone-crushing hug.

“Mark,” Ryan wheezed, “can’t feel my body.” He dropped them with a soft apology.

“Well, this is cute,” said Kevin, who had walked over to the large group, “but there’s still an issue: how would the two of you disappear without Homeworld noticing?” The grumps and new rebels pondered and seemed out of luck, until MatPat gasped:

“Film-making! We make a video showing Homeworld that you got shattered! Oh-or a fake transmission saying you both killed a band of rebels but both of your gems are cracked so you won’t make it home. It’ll work!” The peridot ran into the barn without any sort of group approval, leaving everyone else confused and excited. They had a lot of work to do.

[askthegemgrumps]

|If I could, begin to be, half of what you think of me|

“W-what did you do? T-this isn’t what I-We wanted…” “I-I’m sorry! It’s all I could do!”

|I could do about anything|

“But why this? You could’ve done anything but this!”

|I could even learn how to love|

“I’m sorry! But please, calm down!

|When I see the way you act, wondering when I’m coming back|

“I’m going for the sake of this planet Jon.”

“But we need you here!”

|I could do about anything|

“I know you’ll do fine without me…”

|I could even learn, how to love|

“I’m sorry… I’ll see you on the battlefield…”

|I always thought I might be bad, now I’m sure that it’s true|

“No… Not now… Not here…”

|Cause, I think you’re so good|

“Dan? You okay buddy?”

|And I’m nothing like you|

“N-no! Go away!”

“Dan, please…”

|Look at you go, I just adore you|

“When I-I see you two together, I feel jealous, but I shouldn’t…”

|But I wish that I knew|

“I just have this feeling that something’s missing…”

|What makes you think I’m so special|

“Something, like a sibling… A friend…”

“A partner?”

“… A partner…”

|If I could begin to do, something that does right by you|

“I want you to create it for me… For Homeworld… For us…”

|I could do about anything|

“But… It’s not right… It’s not fusion.”

|I could even learn how to love|

“Not in the eyes of the elite. Please do this… For me…”

|When I see the way you look, shaken by how long it took|

“The project’s data has been lost!”

|I could do about anything|

“You know what? Enough!”

|I could even learn how to love|

“This… Is a one gem job… You all will just throw me off course.”

“Mat… You can’t…”

“I have to complete it… I need a new theory…”

|Like you|

(Wanted to write something based on the full Love Like You and I pulled out this crap. I’m in a crystal grumps mood today, soo)

[askthegemgrumps]

oKAY BUT I HINTED AT THIS IN MY COMIC

random thought I had a couple of hours ago, say that Mark is jasper and becomes corrupted, what if instead becoming all spiky and monstery he becomes warfstashe?

oh, no

[askthegemgrumps]

Mark: a diamond? Barry: *puts on sunglasses* Mark: oRANGE DIAMOND? WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?!?

is that a Phineas and Ferb reference?

[askthegemgrumps]

This was the product of two days of work. It's based on some theorizing Dani and I did, with thanks to @uncharted-constellations for giving me the base of this idea! It also goes with Dani's headcanon of Barry staging his own death.

[askthegemgrumps]

Mark/Jirard : "MY DIAMOND, YOUR DIAMOND... ORANGE DIAMOND" Kevin : "Oh dude, Barry isnt dead, he's just been trying to beat super mario 64 with Arin and Dan." Ross : "They are however, dead on the inside, and i guess thats what counts."

That’s absolutely fantastic.

[askthegemgrumps]

MY DIAMOND!! YOUR DIAMOND!! ORANGE DIAMOND!!!

Okay, okay…I have a GAME THEORY Crystal Grumps headcanon:

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