asmara--pd-blog

[asmara--pd-blog]

12 Qualities of a good leader

1. Focus “It’s been said that leadership is making important but unpopular decisions. That’s certainly a partial truth, but I think it underscores the importance of focus. To be a good leader, you cannot major in minor things, and you must be less distracted than your competition. To get the few critical things done, you must develop incredible selective ignorance. Otherwise, the trivial will drown you.” —Tim Ferriss, bestselling author, host of The Tim Ferriss Show 2. Confidence “A leader instills confidence and ‘followership’ by having a clear vision, showing empathy and being a strong coach. As a female leader, to be recognized I feel I have to show up with swagger and assertiveness, yet always try to maintain my Southern upbringing, which underscores kindness and generosity. The two work well together in gaining respect.” —Barri Rafferty, CEO, Ketchum North America 3. Transparency “I’ve never bought into the concept of ‘wearing the mask.’ As a leader, the only way I know how to engender trust and buy-in from my team and with my colleagues is to be 100 percent authentically me—open, sometimes flawed, but always passionate about our work. It has allowed me the freedom to be fully present and consistent. They know what they’re getting at all times. No surprises.” —Keri Potts, senior director of public relations, ESPN 4. Integrity “Our employees are a direct reflection of the values we embody as leaders. If we’re playing from a reactive and obsolete playbook of needing to be right instead of doing what’s right, then we limit the full potential of our business and lose quality talent. If you focus on becoming authentic in all your interactions, that will rub off on your business and your culture, and the rest takes care of itself.” —Gunnar Lovelace, co-CEO and cofounder, Thrive Market 5. Inspiration “People always say I’m a self-made man. But there is no such thing. Leaders aren’t self-made; they are driven. I arrived in America with no money or any belongings besides my gym bag, but I can’t say I came with nothing: Others gave me great inspiration and fantastic advice, and I was fueled by my beliefs and an internal drive and passion. That’s why I’m always willing to offer motivation—to friends or strangers on Reddit. I know the power of inspiration, and if someone can stand on my shoulders to achieve greatness, I’m more than willing to help them up.” —Arnold Schwarzenegger, former governor of California 6. Passion “You must love what you do. In order to be truly successful at something, you must obsess over it and let it consume you. No matter how successful your business might become, you are never satisfied and constantly push to do something bigger, better and greater. You lead by example not because you feel like it’s what you should do, but because it is your way of life.” —Joe Perez, cofounder, Tastemade 7. Innovation “In any system with finite resources and infinite expansion of population—like your business, or like all of humanity—innovation is essential for not only success but also survival. The innovators are our leaders. You cannot separate the two. Whether it is by thought, technology or organization, innovation is our only hope to solve our challenges.” —Aubrey Marcus, founder, Onnit 8. Patience “Patience is really courage that’s meant to test your commitment to your cause. The path to great things is always tough, but the best leaders understand when to abandon the cause and when to stay the course. If your vision is bold enough, there will be hundreds of reasons why it ‘can’t be done’ and plenty of doubters. A lot of things have to come together—external markets, competition, financing, consumer demand and always a little luck—to pull off something big.” —Dan Brian, COO, WhipClip 9. Stoicism “It’s inevitable: We’re going to find ourselves in some real shit situations, whether they’re costly mistakes, unexpected failures or unscrupulous enemies. Stoicism is, at its core, accepting and anticipating this in advance, so that you don’t freak out, react emotionally and aggravate things further. Train our minds, consider the worst-case scenarios and regulate our unhelpful instinctual responses—that’s how we make sure shit situations don’t turn into fatal resolutions.” —Ryan Holiday, author of The Obstacle is the Way and former director of marketing, American Apparel 10. Wonkiness “Understanding the underlying numbers is the best thing I’ve done for my business. As we have a subscription-based service, the biggest impact on our bottom line was to decrease our churn rate. Being able to nudge that number from 6 percent to 4 Percent meant a 50 percent increase in the average customer’s lifetime value. We would not have known to focus on this metric without being able to accurately analyze our data.” —Sol Orwell, cofounder, Examine.com 11. Authenticity “It’s true that imitation is one of the greatest forms of flattery, but not when it comes to leadership—and every great leader in my life, from Mike Tomlin to Olympic ski coach Scott Rawles, led from a place of authenticity. Learn from others, read autobiographies of your favorite leaders, pick up skills along the way... but never lose your authentic voice, opinions and, ultimately, how you make decisions.” —Jeremy Bloom, cofounder and CEO, Integrate 12. Open-mindedness “One of the biggest myths is that good business leaders are great visionaries with dogged determination to stick to their goals no matter what. It’s nonsense. The truth is, leaders need to keep an open mind while being flexible, and adjust if necessary. When in the startup phase of a company, planning is highly overrated and goals are not static. Your commitment should be to invest, develop and maintain great relationships.”

[asmara--pd-blog]

‘which type of woman is the best?’ 'when you look at her, you feel happiness’

my kind of love has to be the one that i don't have to think about. the kind of love that i never have to convince myself to love any certain part of someone because i'm hoping it will all come naturally. the one that is quiet on the outside, but loud in the inside. I will love you like the space between the lightning and thunder —electrified and alive, but silent and knowing. And I want to be loved like the clouds love the rain. There are times where I want to be let go off on my own, but I will always come back to you and we will always be two parts of the same thing. the kind of love that I know that even though, feels so wrong, I wouldn't mind. I don't want to be right. The kind of love that terrifies me. that terrifies me of the things that I would and could do.

[asmara--pd-blog]

she's got bite marks on her tongue from all the things she never said.

growing up I’ve always been so quiet about the things that bothers me a lot. I believe this has been one of the dangers of my teenage life, people often think I’m always okay because I have mastered the pretending game, which results to everyone, thinking it’s okay to keep on hurting me. I like to be quiet about what I feel because I believe life is too short to let everyone know what I feel and I feel like I am in a constant battle between telling them what I feel because they’re too much or keeping it to myself because it’s not worth it because I know they wouldn’t take it seriously. It’s not that I don’t feel like talking, in fact, I love talking, but it’s just that I don’t think I’m someone worth listening and I love to just keep everything to myself and I love to reflect it on my own. I hold in a lot, but I believe it’s the only way that I know that wouldn’t make me plant hatred to anyone. I should just reflect and forget what they did and just forgive. FORGIVING IS ALWAYS THE KEY TO MANAGE EMOTIONS. 

[asmara--pd-blog]

things we should have told each other before distance took place.

[asmara--pd-blog]

here are some of my ways on how I cope up with stress:

the first thing on the list has to be hanging out with friends. Simply because I feel complete whenever I am with my friends, they make me forget my problems and it’s nice to forget it for a little while. Drinking coffee when raining, I’ve always been a coffee lover and people say I have to avoid caffeine whenever I’m stressed, but that’s not how it actually works for me. Coffee while hearing the sound of the rain is a stress-reliever for me. Watch movie, read books and listen to music, it’s a stress-reliever for me because whenever I do these things, they make me feel like I’m in an another world. Find support from others, I find this very relieving because I get to listen other ways on how to cope up with anything that's bothering me, especially when I'm with my friends they give me advices and it’s actually the best feeling, having to hear other people's (esp. the people that matters) perspective on something. Exercising has to be one because it makes you forget everything and the only thing on your mind is to finish the session because you’re tired and you just want to sleep. Organizing the closet and cleaning the room has to be on the list too. I don't know why, but I feel like the OCD in me unleashes when I'm sad or not in a good mood and right after cleaning, I'm in the best mood. Strolling at the mall with friends or family is one because I get to spend time with people that I love. Last and my favorite, eat. 

BONUS: RELAX, STOP PRESSURING YOURSELF. DO THINGS ONE AT A TIME, BE PATIENT. 

[asmara--pd-blog]

Goals. 

I am actually unsure of what I want to become when I grow up, but there’s one thing I am sure of; I just want my future self to thank me for working hard to satisfy my own self. I have four choices on what to pursue in the near future -- pilot, doctor, psychologist and interior designer. I’ve always wanted to become one of those mentioned.

Pilot- I want to become a Pilot because I’ve always loved the thought of how complicated it is to operate an airplane and I’ve always wanted to fly an aircraft. It’s not really something that I am serious about, but it will always be one of my dreams --to fly an aircraft. I also love the fact that I can fly to other places and bring other people to places safely. (But my mom, she doesn’t want me to pursue this because she’s afraid of plane crashes and she thinks I can’t fly an airplane because I am tanga daw,I will just put other people’s lives at risk daw hahaha) 

Doctor- I am afraid of bloods, the smell of hospitals, injections and surgeries, but I want to be a doctor. It’s funny how I badly want to wear a white coat in the future, but is afraid of the things that I may encounter before I finally get to wear one. I want to become a doctor because I want to build a hospital someday and  cure the sicks. 

Psychologist- I’ve always loved how a psychologist can understand you without you, having to tell him/her what’s going on. I want to become a psychologist because I want to understand other people’s behavior and how their behavior affects their response to certain things. 

Interior Designer- I am very particular with interior designs. I have a knack for designs. I love putting up things, mixing colors and anything. I love how interior designers know exactly what the customers need and it’s about creating something out of your passion. I want to become an interior designer because I love collaborating my designs with other people, putting things together and anything that involves design.

[asmara--pd-blog]

Out of all the achievements that I achieved in the past, this has to be my favorite. The most recent, I must say. It would sound so cliche if I say, I am a Junior High completer and that is an achievement. (though it is really an achievement and not everybody completed junior high) but in a bigger picture, the best achievement here, is actually seeing mom’s genuine smile, and knowing you’re the reason behind her smile. And I believe that is my only purpose in life, to make her proud.

[asmara--pd-blog]

to Asmara, from Asmara

I DON’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE STILL TRYING TO FIND YOURSELF, BUT I WANT TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. I know how much you need this, so I’m just gonna cut right to it - I’m proud of you. I’m proud of you for so many reasons. First of all: You’ve created something that you’re consistent with and that you love to do, and that is writing letters to the things you pay more attention to than people think or that you probably should. You’re building an empire, a safe haven, that is benefiting you. And that makes me proud. Second of all: You’ve finally decided to put yourself before others. You may not always feel like this is a good thing, but let me tell you why it is. You are now in a better place to help others, which I know is the one thing that you want to do most in this world. You are put together and ready for whatever obstacles or challenges this world may throw at you. Your mind is clear and you are more focused than ever. This is all great. You are relaxed and calm and more pleasant to be around. You’re taking care of yourself, which I know you desperately needed and desired, but were always too scared to do. But you’re here now. You’ve been working so hard and getting more passionate about things. You are a better you than you were at the beginning of the year - and that, in itself, is something to be immensely proud of. Keep it up, you, because there will be days you don’t want to (although you think it’s impossible). But you musn’t stop. You must keep going. For everyone’s sake. Including mine. And, well, yours. I HAVE SO MUCH MORE TO TELL YOU BUT I GUESS THAT WILL BE FOR NEXT TIME WHEN I KNOW LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT YOU, BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW I’M PROUD OF YOU TOO BECAUSE YOU’RE STILL HERE LIVING AND BREATHING YOU’VE MADE IT THIS FAR AND I’M GLAD I NEVER THOUGHT WE WOULD EVER BE AT THIS POINT IN LIFE. GOOD JOB!

[asmara--pd-blog]

things I should actually say to you, my friend.

If you ever need a shoulder to lean on and someone who’ll listen, I’ll be here. Don’t succumb into the thought of being alone, isolated from everyone else. If you ever need reassurance that you’re not alone, know that I’ll always be here for you. If you ever feel sad for whatever reason, know that I’ll do my best to cheer you up. If you ever feel out of the loop, I’ll definitely invite you to hang out and include you in whatever I’m doing. In fact, I’ll even force you to, even if you feel like you’re intruding! Whether you read this or not, know that I’ll always be here for you, through all the bullshit and unexpected moments of happiness life throws at us ANDDDDD YOU THINK YOU SUCK SO BAD, BUT YOU DON’T AND YOU NEED TO LEARN THAT YOU ARE AN OKAY INDIVIDUAL ALRIGHT LIKE YOU ARE ATTRACTIVE AND TALENTED AND HOLY SHIT I JUST WISH YOU COULD SEE HOW GOOD YOU ARE. I GOT YOU!

[asmara--pd-blog]

Expectations.

I, as much as possible, do not want other people to have expectations of me. I am a realist. I want things to be practical. I hate when I hear people tell me how disappointed they are with me whenever I don’t meet their expectation of me.... (I DID NOT ASK YOU TO EXPECT SOMETHING FROM ME!!). There are things that I can do, but there are also things that I can’t, so I won’t. I can’t force things to happen. I personally don’t feel any pressure whenever I hear people expect a lot from me. I instead, just let it pass the other ear. If things are bound to happen, they will likely happen.. Same goes to me, I also don’t like expecting from people. I, as much as possible, avoid disappointments.

[asmara--pd-blog]

this mandala.

--- I chose this mandala to represent me. I like it that way. No other color, just black and white. Not that I am boring, it’s just that I like how simple it is. I want my life to be like that, simple. Like this mandala, my life may look very complicated (well, it’s at some point, it is really complicated) but, if you only look at the brighter side, there is no complicated life, just complicated situations. I am this mandala. People, when they first see or meet me, they have impressions on me like mean, unapproachable and etc., but it’s funny how after spending some time with them, they’ll tell me how their impressions to me are very wrong.

[asmara--pd-blog]

                                                     C’ EST LA VIE.

--the selfie project

Like a shadow, I am and I am not. I am Asmara Dagalangit, 16 years of age and a middle child. I believe I am a still stranger to my own self. In my sixteen years of existence, I still am, unsure of my own self.  There are usually times where I know myself too much and times where I don’t know myself at all. I, as person, have my weak and strong points, but that makes me who I am. Life is too short to be worrying about what other people has to say. I therefore am a lovely mess and a masterpiece, all at once.