aura-quartz333

[aura-quartz333]

im so fucking fat

[aura-quartz333]

im the fattest person i know

[aura-quartz333]

[aura-quartz333]

watching old monster high movies for thinspo

[aura-quartz333]

your intrusive thoughts disgust you for a reason. your intrusive thoughts scare you for a reason. your intrusive thoughts send you into a panic for a reason. your intrusive thoughts distress you for a reason. your intrusive thoughts upset you for a reason.

they're not things that you secretly think. they're not things that you secretly believe. they are the worst things your mind could conjure in order to make it difficult for you to get through the day.

[aura-quartz333]

looking at meanspo and pretending its my prettier friends x

[aura-quartz333]

i felt like binging so bad, but i just smoked and chewed avocado instead. food isnt worth it, and i can control my disgusting body. im going insane but atleast i will be pretty.

[aura-quartz333]

too accurate ;-;

me wanting to go on walks to lose weight 🤝 me being too nervous to go on walks because i hate how i look and think everyone is judging me

[aura-quartz333]

- 35kg/77lb

cw 65kg/143lb

Im still a fucking pig so pls don’t judge me lololol but I’m getting there ig 🤘🏻👺

[aura-quartz333]

i want to be dainty, thin and sharp

[aura-quartz333]

reasons to be skinny (personal) -people finding me attractive/ being able to approach people -the jawline and face fat loss -high heels and cute shoes looking dainty instead of gross on my legs -the people i hate being jealous (im pretty stubborn lol) -my arms losing fat, i can wear vests and tanks without looking like a fucking whale -buying more clothes, not having to shop in the "plus" section like a desperate fat bitch. -comfortable naked, especially around other ppl and staying overnight. -i can run and go to the gym without looking like some fat person trying to lose wieght, people will see me as healthy and consistent. -lastly, the confedience i will have once i get my ugw. anyway im going insane and im still a fat ugly bitch, but soon ill be pretty and slim. i am in control. i want this more than food, food isnt worth all this. ✿◕ ‿ ◕✿

[aura-quartz333]

Im starving because....

• I hate the feeling of my thighs touching

• I hate the way my stomach looks

• I hate how my legs look in skirts

• I hate how big my arms look

• I can't look in the mirror without feeling disgusted by what I see

• I hate feeling self conscious about how my body looks when I go out

• I hate how huge my hips look in any style of jeans

• I hate feeling insecure next to my skinny friends

• I hate my every single fat on my body

• I hate that overthink every movement I make, to make sure no one notices how fat I am

• I'm tried of bring fat and gross

• I worry ill never lose weight if I do eat

....

I'm starving because I want to be pretty

[aura-quartz333]

its scary how whenever people look at me they see this disgusting, greedy fat body before they even hear my voice. i guess its good motivation tho <3

[aura-quartz333]

you don’t “feel” fat you are fat

[aura-quartz333]

Just found out normal people don’t watch mukbangs and chug water when they’re hungry…. Weird.

[aura-quartz333]

Safe Foods (っ◔◡◔)っ ❤ -broccoli -cauliflower -carrots -peas -lettuce -tomato -cucumber -spinach -watermelon i wont be fat soon, ill be wanted and looked at and people will love me, i want it so bad, i want it more than food. i am in control. i will be delicate.

[aura-quartz333]

What i do when im craving food -chew ice (i know its like bad for ur teeth but at this point who cares) -do my hair/makeup, a good distraction that reminds me food is ugly but i can choose not to eat, i can choose to be pretty. -think about someone i hate/intimidates me watching me eat it. works wonders if the person you hate is skinner than you. -if ive made it, chew and spit, kinda gross but not as gross as being as fucking fat as i am. -think about my mother, how disappointed she will be -think about college, do you want these people to meet the fat, disgusting unlovable whale or the dainty, artistic girl you will become -take a shower or bath, again just making myself feel pretty without food im planning on losing 20lbs before the start of september, i will bully myself, i will cut the fat from my body if i have to, i will do it so people will love me. people will want me.