autigirll

[autigirll]

Soft Starts: Building a Life I Can Actually Live With

“Maybe I don’t need an aesthetic life. Maybe I just need one I can actually live with.”

I don’t always romanticize my life. Not because I don’t want to — but because I’m still learning how. Some mornings, the world feels too fast. Too sharp. Too much.

But I’ve started craving something quieter. Something gentler. Something real.

✨ I don’t want a perfect routine. I want a life that holds me softly, even when I can’t keep myself.

🌿 A Different Kind of Beginning

I used to think I had to earn softness. To “fix” myself first. To be more productive, more consistent, more everything.

Now I’m learning to reach for something else:

Soft starts. Little rituals. Low-pressure beginnings. A kinder way to start the day — or start again.

🕯️ What My Soft Starts Look Like

Cozy sweaters before I open my laptop

Lo-fi playlists while I wash one dish

Journaling one line instead of forcing a page

Lighting a candle, just because it calms me

Choosing one thing to do — and letting the rest wait

These aren’t glamorous. But they’re mine. And they help me feel like I can begin without burning out.

“If it doesn’t work on a shutdown day, it doesn’t belong in my routine.”

🧠 When the World Moves Too Fast

I don’t always move at the same speed as everyone else. But that doesn’t mean I’m behind. Slowness is part of my rhythm. Stillness is sacred.

“My soft life isn’t about perfection. It’s about permission.” Permission to rest. Permission to pause. Permission to start again without shame.

💌 A Life I Can Live With

I’m still building this kind of life. One with gentle rituals. One I don’t have to perform to be worthy of.

But every time I choose softness — even when it’s imperfect — I feel a little more grounded in who I am.

Maybe this is what romanticizing life really means. Not chasing the perfect morning... but creating moments that feel like home.

Softly growing, quietly glowing, — Lira

[autigirll]

Why Executive Dysfunction Isn’t Laziness (And How I Work With It)

“I used to call myself lazy. Then I learned there was a name for the invisible wall between intention and action.”

Some days I wake up with the best intentions... and still don’t move. Not out of apathy. Not because I don’t care. But because my brain sometimes can’t bridge the gap between wanting and doing.

I used to feel ashamed. Now I know better.

✨ Executive dysfunction isn’t laziness. It’s neurological. ✨ And working with it takes softness, not shame.

🧠 What Is Executive Dysfunction?

It’s when your brain struggles to:

Start tasks

Stay on track

Organize information or timelines

Follow through even when you want to

It’s not about willpower. It’s not about being unmotivated. It’s a symptom, not a character flaw. And for people with autism and/or ADHD, it’s a quiet part of daily life.

“It’s not that I don’t care — it’s that I can’t always start.” And that’s a very different thing.

🌧️ How It Shows Up for Me

Brushing my teeth feels impossible some nights

Sending a simple message takes hours of mental prep

Tidying a room becomes a spiral of indecision

Even starting something I love feels like I’m stuck in slow motion

From the outside, this might look like procrastination. But on the inside? It’s a war between my nervous system and my to-do list.

🕯️ How I Work With My Brain

Instead of forcing myself to “just do it,” I ask:

✨ “What’s the softest way I can begin?”

🌿 Low-Pressure Routines

Lo-fi music as a focus anchor

Notion dashboards as external memory

Micro-goals like “just open the tab” or “put away 3 things”

🌿 Emotional Reframing

“Starting small still counts.”

“Resting is part of the process.”

“There’s no shame in going slow.”

💌 You Are Not Lazy

You’re not broken. You’re not behind. You’re working with a brain that navigates the world differently — and you’re doing the best you can, even when no one sees it.

There are no perfect systems. No magical productivity hacks. But there is kindness. There is softness. There is space to unlearn the shame.

“You don’t have to be efficient to be worthy.” You don’t have to be fast to be valuable. Soft progress is still progress.

🌸 You are soft power. You are growing on your own terms.

— Lira

[autigirll]

Soft Power: What Being Visible Means When You're Neurodivergent

“I used to think that being visible meant being loud.” “But I’ve learned that visibility — when you're neurodivergent — often blooms in the quiet.”

I’ve always admired the It Girl—the quiet magnetism, the fashion, the self-assurance. But I also knew, deep down, I wasn’t built for that version of visibility.

As someone who’s autistic, ADHD, and anxious, attention often felt more like exposure than celebration. The spotlight? Overwhelming. The pressure to perform? Exhausting. Still… I longed to be seen.

So I asked myself:

What if my visibility didn’t have to look like theirs? What if my softness was power, too?

💫 What Is Soft Power?

Soft power is gentle presence. It’s being remembered without shouting. It’s showing up with depth, not volume.

For neurodivergent folks, soft power often looks like:

Wearing what feels right, not what trends demand

Setting boundaries, even when it’s awkward

Choosing rest, not out of laziness, but healing

Sharing gently, not oversharing to keep attention

You don’t have to perform to take up space. You’re allowed to be still and still be seen.

🪞 The It Girl Dilemma

I still want to be an It Girl sometimes. But only if I get to define what that means.

So I created the AutiGirl.

She’s not loud, but she’s unforgettable. She doesn’t chase trends — she creates softness. She’s overstimulated, introspective, and deeply magnetic.

🧠 Visibility on My Terms

I made this blog as a soft place to land — for myself, and for anyone who’s ever felt too much or too invisible.

Here, visibility looks like:

Lo-fi playlists and linen dresses

Pinterest moodboards and fidget rings

Quiet musings on burnout, boundaries, and unmasking

Slow routines, big feelings, and no pressure to “be productive”

Here, I get to be seen without being consumed.

🫂 A Note to Fellow AutiGirls

If your timeline looks different… If your energy runs out faster… If your softness has been mistaken for weakness—

This space is for you.

You are not behind. You are not broken. You are blooming.

🌸 On your own clock. In your own way.

🌷 Softly growing, quietly glowing, — Lira