avantgardecowboy
avantgardecowboy
evan
35 posts
my diary
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
When your bro promised he could deal with the quarrels of life on his own so you deadass have to ignore the somber tune that follows buddy where ever he goes.
But after watching his poorly played facade slip while playing the game you realize you gotta do something to help him.
So you embark on a quest to find a genie to help bro overcome his unending turmoil.
However after finding the genie chilling in a cave you find out there's only one way to get the wishes you desire.
After sacrificing your dignity and returning to help bro you find him tweaking tf out cuz he went on his own quest to rid himself of his humanity.
However to your suprise the beast speaks…
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Gonna kms 😂
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Can’t do this no mo 💯
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
What is stopping me from just ending my shit
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
i just be rambling
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
nvm
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
3 attempts but yet im still alive. it’s hard to be awake at times and not have any temptations but the earth is so beautiful and i want to experience it all before i pass
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
“someday all the love you’ve given to the wrong people will be returned back to you in someone who’s waited their whole life for your kind of love”
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
i’ve lived my whole life never knowing what it felt like having a large friend group, or any friends for that matter. i have never been asked to go to somebodies house as a child through my teenage years just out of the enjoyment that my presence brings to them. i feel like i’ve missed out on so many things that everybody else sees as normal to them. i’ve yearned my entire life to have people i can call or text or hang out with but i have never received that. my high school graduating class consisted of 45 students, and of those 45 students i was the only person who didn’t have somebody to hug and cry with as we said our goodbyes. i would do everything in my power to become ingrained with one of the many groups that has formed in my grade but yet none of them worked. i would spend nights learning about things that they liked and talked to them about but i would only be overshadowed by the friends they already had. was i just that much of an undesirable person that they saw no reason to connect with me? the only friend i have now as an adult has his own friends besides me, he has people that i do not and a part of me is jealous but i cannot put that on him because he was more desired than i was. throughout my teenage years i was picked on for liking the things i did, or being the way that i was, to the point where i would fake being who i really was just to become one of them, still to only be left behind. i wonder if i had grown up having the things that my peers and classmates had if i would’ve become different now. would i still like the things i do? be the person i am today? would i still look the same? talk the same? even walk the same? i’ve grown up surrounded by a large family, so i cannot say i am ever truly alone, but i feel it. there are days where i wish i wasn’t the person i am. even now as i start to make newer connections i feel as if i cling and latch onto them more than i should, and because of that they only begin to push themselves away because of it.
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
love is so complex but yet so simple. one person might see love as big gestures and gifts and trips overseas, while the other views love as having somebody to talk to in the kitchen after work or little kicks underneath the table from their shoe at a restaurant. maybe its the way we’re brought up, having our parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles and family friends as a way to base our perception of love is. there’s no right way or love somebody but there’s so many wrong ways, mistakes we make as humans that could ruin love. how does one even know when they’re in love? is it a feeling in their stomach they get when that person, or thing, isn’t around? is it the way that person treats us? like we mean something to them so we reciprocate that feeling back? is there a minimum amount of time you can say you love a person? you can go to the beach and see the ocean and fall in love with it once but when you meet a person for the first time it’s inappropriate to say you love them? why is that exactly? even as i’m writing this i am asking more questions than i am giving answers that i myself do not have, and if i can’t answer these questions myself then who can? i have loved many people in my life and i am continuing to love more people as it progresses. i am only 18 years old, i still have so many more years of my life that i can enjoy. maybe i’ll have a wife and daughter and son and cat or dog that i can say i love too, and if i don’t then who am i to say that “i cannot be loved”. pathetic excuses like “i don’t think ill ever love somebody again” are rudimentary. we cannot let a persons actions define our future for love, if we as humans let the past define us then we would have been stagnant since the way we evolved to walk the earth. i want to grow and love, i am so young and have so much love to give and i get excited thinking about it because it makes me think of what my future could hold for me.
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
we need to bring this era of punishment back into our 2024 to do list
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
me after wishing death upon anybody
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
why am i me
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
please please please
0 notes
avantgardecowboy · 2 years ago
Text
omg i think i fucked up
0 notes