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*Sigh*
I’m quite sad and annoyed right now. A guy who I had thought was going to be coming over tonight (we’ve met a couple times before) has just canceled on me because his aunt who he hasn’t seen in years is visiting from Florida. I know I can’t really express my annoyance or sadness to him for picking family over a woman he just met a couple of times, but that doesn’t stop me from being disappointed and frustrated at the cancelation. I just want someone to want to spend time with me more than anyone else in the world and put me first. I’m tired of always being the second choice or the “when it’s convenient” girl. Maybe I’m overreacting to the whole situation, but that doesn’t make how I’m feeling now any less real.
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Blown Off
So yet another guy who said he wanted to meet me tonight ended up canceling because he supposedly had to babysit his nephew. I get that people have lives and shit happens, but this is the third guy in as many days to make plans to meet me and then cancel said meet up at the last minute. In all of these cases, I had to text them in order to get a response that they wouldn’t be able to make it. With this many instances, it has to be something I’m doing wrong. I can’t think of any other explanation.
#whatiswrongwithme#annoyed#amIactingsesperate#whyisthishappeningtome#whatthefuckguys#fuckingmen#lonelylady
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Annoyed and frustrated
I’m so sad and mad right now. I had an argument with a friend via text because he “couldn’t” talk on the phone with me because he was hanging out with another friend. I was upset because he told me that he has a “date” with someone tomorrow. It’s a complicated situation, but I’ve expressed the feelings that I have for him to him several times to no avail. We even had a brief (albeit intense) physical relationship that was abruptly ended by a mistake of mine. I’ve tried to remain friends with him, have helped him out countless times financially, emotionally etc, but it feels like no matter what I do or don’t do, I can’t make things right or okay again. I’m so annoyed and frustrated at myself right now.
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Rejection
I’m so sick and tired of being rejected by men in whom I am interested. It’s so depressing that even when I have low or no standards, it seems like I cannot obtain nor hold a man’s interest for any significant length of time anymore. I would love a relationship (I love love), but I also have an extremely high sex drive. At this point, I would even be willing to settle for a friends with benefits situation, so long as I was receiving oral sex and getting laid at least four times a week (once a day or more is ideal for me, but I’m being realistic. Man do I need to get some!
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“The rich telling the poor that other poor people are the problem is what’s wrong with conservatism”
-unknown
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“When it comes to the poor: No. Lives.Matter.”
-Ice-T/Body Count
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Fuck yes he is!
I used to wonder why people loved Criminal Minds so much but now I know…
Shemar Moore is hot as hell
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Heartbroken
A good friend of mine is feeling suicidal and I’m heartbroken that I can’t really do anything to help him. I just want to go to him, hold him close and tell him that everything is going to be alright. I want to cuddle him and tell him that even though he doesn’t feel like it now, he truly matters in this world and that things will get better. I want to tell him that I think I might love him and even though we haven’t known each other very long, that he might be “the one” for me. I wish I could tell him all that, but I can’t and so I remain heartbroken 😔😢.
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“Don’t say you miss me, just come get me.”
— Rihanna, James Joint
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Why do I bother?
I’ve been wondering lately why I even bother doing keto to lose weight or try to look nice. It doesn’t make me feel any better and it doesn’t make guys notice or want to spend time with me. I sometimes feel like I should just give up. On myself and life.
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