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Big fan of characters in magical fantasy settings whose #1 spell is Right Hook

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Something so consistently amazing about a world of magic that introduces you to characters with such unique weapons or cool powers and then there’s just. A guy with a gun.

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if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.

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Turns out the horsemen of the Apocalypse now prefer to go by Shareholder Profit, Private Equity, Corporate Personhood, and Workforce Optimization.

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call my bed an ashtray the way there's fags in there

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but of course mark s feels nothing for gemma that’s what he was born to do

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My cats have this meow that means "please come with me to fix this" after which they'll lead me to the problem in question, usually a empty (or 'empty') food bowl or a closed door they want open. They look at the 'problem', they look back at me, clear message.

What fascinates me is how this illustrates what they percieve as being in the realm of my 'power.' I control the food, I control the door, sure, but my cats love to sit on the balcony in the sun, and it has happened plenty of times that on a rainy day they come get me, go to the balcony and show me... the rain. "Please fix this" they say. "Please get rid of the wet"

"Silly kitty," I say, "I can't control the rain." I then walk into the shower and turn on the rain.

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Pisses me off how good Shakespeare actually is. Like yeah he's actually that good. People hype him up like he's the best English writer ever, and yeah he's actually an S+ tier writer.

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Imagine scarfing down chinese food like a rabid animal only for jeff bezos to come and sit next to you and insult your dead wife, so you go home and get a lobotomy about it

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ITS WINTER WHILE GEMMA IS IN THE UNDERWORLD AND SPRING WHEN SHES ON EARTH. WHAT KIND OF PERSEPHONE SHIT

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the vibe i bring to the function.

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a lot of people say Thomas Doherty’s acting decisions as Harry Hook are lifted from Captain Hook’s character in OUAT but I straight up disagree. Harry’s look might be aesthetically inspired by OUAT Hook but on a personality level those are two completely different men.

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Worst dog name, go.

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encountering an inconvenience while cold: damn that sucks, oh well, i’ll figure something else out!!

encountering an inconvenience while hot: we all deserve to die right now, come on everyone, lets all go die

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mark finding out that his innie is obsessed with ricken’s shitty book so funny to me. imagine learning that your worksona was revolutionized by colleen hoover. i’d kms

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Hamlet Act III Scene II