barksdalesballs

[barksdalesballs]

Rant.

Hi guys, I know I haven't been super active lately, but honestly I want to talk about some of the reason why/why I haven't been really *creating* anything for you guys to watch me yap about.

Over the last few months, I've been incredibly, incredibly drained, and at this point I just need to find an outlet so I can talk about it. For now, this post will be it. sorry, it's a lot to read.

I haven't been as creative recently and that majorly falls on the fact that I am trapped within an extremely toxic community. For the longest time, Instagram Roleplay has been a safe space for me, a place for me to make crazy crossovers (like Donnie Barksdale meets IT, or Scud meets Cyberpunk), but as of late, the community had been bleeding me dry of all of those creative juices.

for a while (about a month) I was in the Fear Street community on Instagram. I joined as several characters - ocs, crossovers, all sorts of things - but that community is squeezing the last of my motivation out of me. While in the community, a small group of people harassed me and a group of my friends for creating ocs that weren't just copy and paste nonsense, like theirs were. Two of my friends were called names for having disabilities, and while I wasn't directly attacked, I heard that they spoke of me when I wasn't around.

On top of them justifying literal CYBERBULLYING, three of them proceeded to roleplay as Tr*mp, D*ddy, and (K*n)Ye because they thought it was hilarious. this caused a downfall of one group chat, and led to another. I had spent time trusting one of these people, only for them to come through and decide to completely tear up the fandom.

But the problems didn't stop in the Fear Street fandom. People no longer want to write. I went about ten months without a single roleplay because people completely exclude lesser-known characters and crossovers, treating them like shit for no reason. And lesser-known fandoms? FORGET IT! you'll never get any interaction.

Or, if your oc is liked enough, someone will completely steal ALL OF YOUR WORK. I've seen many, many, maaaany original characters get completely copied and pasted by people who are too lame and too sad to come up with their own characters. (Thankfully, my ocs tend to not get pull, so I don't get copied.)

also? adults shipping with minors, people roleplaying BABIES, people sexualizing CHILDREN, people saying slurs they cant reclaim? this shit happens DAILY in this community. it's disgusting.

But really, this community was a safe space for soooooooo many people , including myself, and it's just turned to SHIT and ruined my desire to do ANYTHING. I'm sorry I haven't posted, I've been putting up with this shit & irl drama for ages now.

[barksdalesballs]

uuugh.

hi guys, I'm sorry I've been dead for a long time. in all honesty, I'm TIRED.

Ive been drained as hell & my desire to be creative is sloooowly being taken away from me because of a certain community (cough, the Instagram roleplay community) but I feel as if I should make a comeback sometime soon!

I just, uh, I don't know what y'all really want to see from me. should I post about ocs? orrrrr go back to my gross obsession with Donnie Barksdale that's been kind of dead as of late? I don't really know 😭.

[barksdalesballs]

mix왓처 The Watcher, 2000 WMV9 AC3 5 1CH CD1 ACE

Forgive me Father, I'm only a human being!😭🙏

[barksdalesballs]

Johnny Silverhoof 🐴🎸

[barksdalesballs]

Someone call them a Delamain...

[barksdalesballs]

I love Keanu Reeves

That is all

[barksdalesballs]

Bill is so quick with it my fucking crying

[barksdalesballs]

[barksdalesballs]

Attitude

[barksdalesballs]

love this part of the oil fields scene

[barksdalesballs]

Number one rockerboy

[barksdalesballs]

welcome to another episode of "james spader's characters saying the most atrocious things ever" T_T i can't stop laughing at the way he's gesturing HELPPPPPPPPPPP

speaking of sex (2001) // james spader as dr. roger klink.

[barksdalesballs]

this too could be silverv

[barksdalesballs]

I stayed up untill 4 am making this and you WILL see it

[barksdalesballs]

before and after

[barksdalesballs]

[barksdalesballs]

“check out this idiot” coded